sulphur

imjusthereforsupernatural  asked:

Fake fic! "Let's Take a Walk"

Sam and Dean go for a walk to talk about Y/N and Dean convinces Sam to finally confess his love for her. However, when they get back to the motel room, the room reeks of sulphur, the room is a complete mess and Y/N is laying on the floor, not moving and is covered in blood.

(Sorry. I’m such an angsty writer haha.)

Glee Nostalgia: TDB Rewatch 1x07 Throwdown

“I don’t trust a man with curly hair. I can’t help picturing tiny birds laying sulphurous eggs in there and I find it disgusting.”

Ok, so we have another heavily focused adult episode, but for the most part of this episode, the battles between Sue and Will are actually quite hilarious. Their ridiculous slow-motion fight with voice overs makes me laugh (and even I do not like the episode in which it appears in Season 6, I do like the callback we to this moment, with the kids looking on). We get some great one-liners from Sue (”Cockfight? Fantastic.”), the “don’t touch me” moment and Sue’s first storm out to ‘Oh Fortuna’ (is it the first? I can’t remember. Whatever- it’s funny).

And speaking of Sue’s quotable moments, can I just say, I love how the kids do not even question what she is calling them when creating Sue’s kids, they just get up.

The kids also get some great moments in this episode. We have a delightful Kurt and Mercedes moment when Will is asking the kids what they want to do in Glee, the fantastic ‘Hate On Me’ (Sue’s Kids clearly win this round. Not only is the performance dynamic, we get Kurt’s kicky feet), Kurt’s concern about Sue shaving his head, Mercedes stand up moment to Sue and Will and the gorgeous ‘Keep Holding On’. No seriously, this group number is beautiful, and as much as I am not really invested in Quinn’s narrative, this is one of my favourites (and Season 5 did an amazing job revisiting this number. You should have taken notes, ‘Raise Your Glass’).

But speaking of group numbers, ‘Ride Wit Me’ was one of the greatest little moments, and I had to wonder why the show did not embrace this concept a little more. They clearly have a talented bunch, and I just wanted to see them having this sort of fun a lot more.

So while there was some humour with the Sue and Will stuff, it started to drag by the end (and was convoluted by other shit Will was involved), it is- as per usual- the kids who were the real heroes of this episode, once again rising about the dramas of the adults to come together as a group.

@todaydreambelievers

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Popcorn: [SCREEEECH] Hi! 💕[SCREEEEECH] wha

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(via Sulphur-crested Cockatoo in highkey | Flickr - Photo Sharing!)

(Our tiefling warlock, Malveus, has a nasty habit of interacting with things by licking them. So far, this has included dripping dungeon walls, hallucinogenic mushrooms, a spider’s butt, a gray slime, and various other creatures.)
(Early on in our third session, the party comes across a corridor scattered with glowing crystals which shatter with a blinding light when handled roughly. A couple of us manage dexterity checks to collect a few, and then the expected happens.)

Malveus: I lick one.

DM: (exasperated) It explodes. And it takes all sensation in your tongue. You can still talk, but you can’t taste anything any more.

Malveus: What?! No!

Other warlock: Oh, man, that’s your special thing! How can you live without licking shit?

Malveus: Can I heal myself?

DM: A Lesser Restoration would do it, but none of you can cast that yet.

Malveus: (mutinous grumbling)

(We move on. After a minor scrap and some uneventful trekking through caverns, Malveus suddenly snaps.)

Malveus: I can’t take it any more! I need my freaking tongue back, guys! I summon Asmodeus to heal me.

(General commotion. Most of us think this is a stupid idea.)

DM: Fine, try it. But I hope you know just how high of a roll I’m going to make you –

Malveus: Natural 100.

DM: Bull!

Cleric: No shit, (DM,) he actually did it!

DM: Fuck. Okay, fine! Fine. Fuck it. Asmodeus the demon lord appears in a gout of sulphurous flame, and says, (scary voice) YES, MY SON?

Malveus: O my father, I beg of you, heal my broken tongue!

DM as Asmodeus: … WHAT THE FUCK, MALVEUS. YOU SUMMON ME FOR THIS SHIT? YOU’RE RIDICULOUS.

Malveus: Please, father, I –

DM as Asmodeus: SHUT UP, MORON. FINE, I’LL HEAL YOUR DAMN TONGUE. BUT IT’LL COST YOU YOUR SIGHT.

Malveus: Done!

Cleric: What? Are you nuts?!

Sorceress: Don’t be a damn fool!

Malveus: Guys, it’s fine. I can see through the eyes of my familiar, I’ll still be able to see. Ish. Totally worth it. Take my sight.

DM as Asmodeus: DONE. YOU’RE AN IDIOT. (regular voice) He heals your tongue, blinds you, slaps you across the back of the head and you take six bludgeoning damage, and then he vanishes.

Other tiefling: (waving cheerfully) Bye, Dad!

Malveus: I summon back my quozzit and put it on my head, so its eyes are about where mine are.

(So now our Malveus wanders through the Underdark with his centipede-formed familiar permanently affixed to the front of his face.)

Scene: a spaceship. A human and an alien are chatting over a cup of hot chocolate/brine. It is the first time the alien has ever mixed with humans.

Human: “So yeah, I slipped and Brad just started laughing like an asshole and…”

Alien: “Sorry, what?! Can you repeat that? I think my translator is broken.”

Human: “I said I slipped and Brad started laughing his stupid head off like the asshole he is!”

Alien: (takes translator off, checks it, puts it back on.) “Oh my [untranslatable, deity associated with surprise and sulphuric acid] you actually meant to say that!”

Human: “Yeah… why?”

The two of them stare at each other, the human in confusion, the alien in straight up horror.

Alien: “… your species, your anuses can… laugh?”