sugar replacement

Godly Beauty Glamour

Intent: to look irresistible; to have a goddess-like presence. 

You know when you want to look like you can both kill a man or make his night? Somewhere between Cat Woman and Shiva? Or give off an unreal brilliance? 

Literally me. Daily.

Which is why this glamour is so useful. 

Start it off by taking a moment to envision the image you have for yourself. Imagine that you already have, that this is who you are. Then, begin to work the spell by combining cane sugar and pink sea salt in a glass container. 

Light an incense that fits with your desired image. Since my intent is to be intimidating as well as beautiful, I chose patchouli and dragon’s blood.  

  • patchouli = love, desire, fulfillment, attraction
  • dragon’s blood = strength, confidence, goddess glam

The next step involves every witch’s favorite thing.




Light a white candle and set it behind the glass. Combine cinnamon with sugar and salt blend, rotating clockwise. You can use ground cinnamon or a cinnamon stick. 

  • cinnamon = quick results, a bit of sass

Grind up two rose petals and place at the bottom of a second glass. Grind up another rose petal and mix it with the cinnamon, sugar, and salt. 

Put the objects you wish to enchant in the second container with the roses so that they fit comfortably. I enchanted several makeup items, but you can use jewelry, lotion, or a mirror. 

Pour the contents of the remaining glass over the objects. You may choose to say an incantation here. I used: “I am goddess, I am light. No one can resist my sight. Moon that turns from new to full, no one can resist my pull”. If you don’t want to use an incantation, you don’t have to. 

Envision yourself radiating light, as if sparkling from the inside out.

Allow the incense and candle to burn out fully. Alternatively, you may decide to snuff out the candle after the incense has finished burning. 

Keep reading

Ryder Pranks

- Scott is finally well enough to join Sara and crew on the Tempest. Sara forgets he’s on board, and makes the mistake of falling asleep in the common area. Scott immediately does the shaving cream on the hand prank. Sara swears this means war.

- The next time Scott falls asleep, Sara draws on his face using permanent marker. “Little Ryder” is written across his forehead in bold letters, plus a handle bar moustache and some choice swear words on his cheeks.

- Scott replaces the sugar in the pathfinder quarters with salt. Sara’s morning coffee is ruined. Scott doesn’t return the sugar for a week.

- Sara fills Scott’s helmet with glitter. Scott is fucking pissed, because that shit gets in his hair, his mouth, the creases of his armour, fucking everywhere. He demands to know where she even got glitter, but Liam and Gil have sworn loyalty to Sara and refuse to tell.

- The ship descends into all out chaos when Scott replaces the water in the water cooler with vinegar. Liam fills the shower heads with kool-aid. Peebee fills everyone’s boots with sand. Gil steals all the toilet paper on the ship and hides it.

- Nobody trusts anyone anymore. Sleep with one eye open. Never accept food from anyone else. Keep your stuff locked up. People start using mirrors to check around corners.

- It ends when Lexi takes a bite out of what she thinks is chocolate. She has to call a meeting and lay down the law. An “Absolutely No Pranks” sign is posted above the bridge.

Hannigram AU

everything is the same but Will is the world’s pickiest eater.

He prefers every food to be cold, the only meat he is ever interested in eating is fish (but even then he isn’t EXCITED he just liked that he didn’t have to get it from the store), he considered going vegetarian but then he’d lose his excuse to go fishing as often as he does.

The only foods he honestly enjoys seem to be starches (potatoes, pasta, plain unbuttered popcorn), chocolate makes him sick, he’s lactose intolerant.

He’s able to choke down most foods without complaining (mostly because hating 90% of all food means he’s used to eating it and would rather not make a fuss) but that also means at age 34 eating ice cream and actually LIKING it for the first time, then filling up his freezer with the brand and making himself incredibly sick over one particularly unpleasant weekend.

Will you can’t microwave and egg that’s gross. “Eggs are gross no matter how you cook them” then DON’T EAT THEM

Will would never complain about the food Hannibal puts in front of him (because honestly its about as unpleasant as anything else Will eats) but he also knows better than to say he likes it, because if he says he LIKES this then Hannibal will try to make it again for him, or might ask followup questions.

Will is fully capable of bullshitting ‘this must have been hard to make’ and ‘the presentation is gorgeous’ and ‘it just falls apart on my tongue’ meanwhile his gut is just twisting and miserable and he occasionally can not physically make himself swallow somethign without a swig of wine.

Hannibal is disgusted by Wills diet.

Luckily Hannibal will eventually find ONE type of meat that REALLY agrees with Will, and which he is actually capable of enjoying with real, bright, childish delight and very nearly actual tears.

(human. its human meat. in case. that’s….unclear)

Originally posted by this-is-my-becoming

^the face of a man that does not enjoy food

tag yourself
  • Light: angry child, likes murder and death, enjoys long walks to chip cabinet
  • L: refuses to sit in a chair like a normal person, bribes people with strawberries, no blood in body as it has been replaced with sugar
  • Mello: yummy yummy chocolate in tummy, thinks they're high fashion but in reality only wears sleeveless vests, always #2
  • Near: smol child, always #1 effortlessly, enjoys toys and puzzles
  • Ryuk: antisocial, has withdrawals when going too long without apples, constantly internally asks "lol what even am i"
For Everyone Starting Their Weight Loss Plans Tomorrow

1- Make sure that you

  • Have accurate weight / measurements recorded [make sure you weigh yourself early, after you use the bathroom and before you eat breakfast]
  • Think about what meals you want to eat for the day.
  • Start meal prepping for the week [if you have time, cook them, if not, just write them down]
  • Pick a time when you will be done eating for the day [mines will be 7PM]
  • Pick a cheat day [if you want one]
  • Pick a “weigh in day” [ don’t weigh yourself everyday, you will stress yourself out, weight fluctuates every 24 hours or so]
  • Go food shopping
  • Download a fitness / health / weight tracker app on your phone [make sure everyday that your pedometer is turned on, it will count your steps, calories burned and miles went. ] (if you have a Samsung Galaxy you should have the SHealth Fitness app)

2- Some Helpful Tips From Me

  • Aim for at least 30 minutes of exercise EVERY SINGLE DAY
  • Buy Vanilla Protein Powder [I use a small amount of it as a replacement for sugar / artificial sweeteners in my smoothies]
  • DON’T WORRY ABOUT COUNTING CALORIES [to me it’s tedious and as long as you watch your serving sizes, sodium intake and know that what you’re eating is already super healthy, then you are good!]
  • If you don’t have a set workout plan go on Youtube. There are so many long / short workout videos, create a playlist.
  • KNOW YOUR LIMITS. Do not feel bad that you cannot do certain moves or do something for too long. That should inspire you to want to build your stamina and endurance.
  • Set small goals. Instead of 100 pounds this year, aim for 2 pounds a week / 8 -10 pounds a month. 
  • Plan your workouts according to time. 


Please do not stress yourself out over a single thing because you will end up wanting to quit if things get overwhelming. Trust me, I know. It’s happened to me like 100 times. Some of these things cannot be done by everyone, whether it be lack of money or lack of time or even motivation. The #1 issue I have is that I feel like I’m not doing enough so I end up stopping. Some days will be better than others, do not let 1 bad day or 2 or even 3, be the reason you give up. Lastly, please remember that the idea / task of weight loss is MORE MENTAL THAN PHYSICAL. Whenever you get lazy, just think about every single day you’re uncomfortable. Think about how you’ve been trying to change for years.  Think about new clothes, the amount of energy and the new confidence and all of the new things you’ll be able to experience this year simply because you feel better about yourself…

I’d really appreciate it if you guys tagged me in your posts/ blog entries about your progress for the next few months… I’m giving out tips and advice but I myself need motivation…..

I have recently fallen in love with agave. I know, I know. I’m late but…I’m here! It’s such a wonderful substitute for sugar. My favorite use so far has been in iced teas or drizzled over grapefruit.

For those of you who are unaware, agave is a source of natural sugar extracted from several species of agave, which are succulent plants found mostly in Mexico, the southwestern United States, and central/tropical South America.

Interesting sidenote: I bought this Ojibwa tea the other day. Not because I knew what it was but because it was produced in the town I grew up in. Crazy to find it here in Puerto Rico! The flavor is not my cup of tea (ha-ha) but worth trying none-the-less.

cheap, quick, and easy vegan recipe

you will need

1. an obscure brand of gluten free flour
2. coconut sugar
3. egg replacer 
3. maple syrup
4. xylitol
5. pixie dust
12. agar agar
6. 6 cups of raw cashews
7. coconut oil (for flavour)
9. 4 more expensive non-standard ingredients marked as “optional” but you can’t really do without
9. honey (”but not for strict vegans!”)
9. an expensive piece of kitchen equipment 
8. chill for 24 hours

Finnish Kerroskiisseli; Vanilla Pudding with Strawberry Kisel Soup
(20 minutes)

Vanilla Pudding
6 00 ml milk
50 ml sugar
50 ml corn starch
1 teaspoon vanilla sugar

Strawberry Kisel
4 00 ml strawberry juice (if not optional, see second recipe below)
1 table spoon potato or corn starch
200 grams strawberries


5 00 ml strawberries
8 00 ml water
1 50 ml sugar
4 table spoon potato or corn starch
1 00 ml water

Vanilla Pudding
- Put all ingredients into a pot (best is a pot with thick bottom)
- Bring to boil while stirring constantly (milk burns easily!)
- When the mixture starts to boil, reduce temperature and boil about 4 minutes until the mixture thickens. Depending of your taste the pudding can be liquid like or very solid.
- Take out from the stove and sprinkle a little bit of sugar on top of it to avoid thick, dry layer forming on top of the pudding.

Strawberry Kisel from strawberry juice and berries
- Put juice and starch into a pot.
- Heat up constantly stirring until the soup thickens.
- When the first boiling bubble appears, remove the pot from the stove.
- Add berries carefully in the soup.
- Smooth the soup with a hand blender (optional)

OR Strawberry Kisel 2 from water and berries
- Mix water, berries and sugar into a pot.
- Bring to boil and remove from the stove.
- Mix starch into 1 00 ml of cold water.
- Pour starchwater into berry soup slowly while stirring constantly.
- Place the pot back on the stove and let it bubble ONCE ONLY. DON’T BOIL!
- Smooth the soup with a hand blender (optional)

When both vanilla pudding and strawberry kisel have cooled down, put vanilla pudding in the bottom of the class and pour kisel on top of it. If wanted, decorate the dessert with raspberries.

Can be eaten hot or cold! Milk can be replaced with vegan option(s). Sugar can be replaced with fructose. Berries can be replaced with any berries or fruits. Juice can be replaced with any juice. Kisel can be made from starch and juice only if wanted.
Day Fifty-Six

-It begins. Black Friday. Until today, I had thought stories of shoppers sprinting through the aisles were myths. I now know better, and I am terrified. Luckily, I found my register to be stocked with stickers, so at least I have been given this small beacon of hope.

-I witnessed Hipster Sasquatch lumber into the store, not to be seen again.

-A young girl, no older than eight, purchased five teddy bears much larger than she herself. She was entirely incapable of carrying even one of them, but, much to my inspiration, this fact did not stop her from trying.

-A mother told her young son that he could pick one pack of gum. After a moment’s contemplation, he picked the single largest value pack of gum we had, triple the cost of any other pack. This was still acceptable under his mother’s rules, and in my eyes, that makes him the single most thrifty Black Friday shopper I encountered tonight.

-I overheard a guest at a nearby register say, “I just killed a girl.” I do not know how serious they were or what the context was, but I am grateful to be working the registers and not the floor tonight.

-Several guests came into the store solely to buy a bottle of soda. I do not understand why they would take such a risk or sit through such a wait, but I admire their bravery and was happy to ring them up.

-Multiple groups of women traipsed through the store in matching homemade Black Friday shirts. These people embrace the chaos of the night far too eagerly. I feel they would thoroughly enjoy a purge-like event, but only so as to raid department stores, and I respect that.

-While there were, as expected, several guests who were unhappy with how their night was progressing, twice as many asked how I was doing, genuinely interested, and expressed their concern and gratitude towards me working tonight, apologizing on behalf of those with less respect. While these were just small gestures, they meant the world to me and made my shift bearable. 

-One of the biggest sellers of the night was a four foot tall Michelangelo statue. This was Michelangelo the teenage mutant ninja turtle, not Michelangelo the acclaimed Renaissance artist, but it was just as terrifying as if it had been the latter.

-I walked through the store on my break. Shelves had been ransacked. Displays had been picked dry. Sleepless and soulless faces passed me, scavenging for the last sales of the night. I did not expect this level of barren apocalyptic wasteland until Trump was at least inaugurated, yet I found it all around me.

-I was accused of hurting a woman with a powerful static shock, despite not coming within three feet of her at any point. I believe this to be my superhero origin and I look forward to becoming a much less cool and much more white Virgil Hawkins. 

-A woman informed me that she would only buy an item she had brought up if it rang up at $5. It turned out to be $4.26. She made me put it back. I do not understand the logic, but I admire someone so firm in their beliefs.

-Coworkers who regularly bring everyone candy during long shifts are the best kind of coworkers. 

-In hopes of making it through my shift and the drive home alive, I downed an energy drink. Unfortunately, I forgot that energy drinks tend to make me believe I am even funnier than I usually think. I would now like to apologize to the guests who found this out tonight.

-I am reminded of how grateful I am that I work at Target, as even in the midst of the conservative south, I am surrounded with people who are as upset about Trump and Pence existing as a concept as I am, and this leads to many a great conversation.

-A man was offended to find that the Red Bull he was about to buy was sugar-free. He replaced it with a full-sugar one, telling his father that he was trying to die and that was not going to do the job, and branding himself the most relatable guest of the night.

-I am thankful for those who attempted to lift my spirits throughout my shift, but I would specifically like to single out the big daddy of dad jokes who tried very, very hard. Displaying a case of selective dyslexia, the man read out the card reader’s instruction of “do not remove card” as “don’t move,” and proceeded to pose and freeze in place for a solid thirty seconds. This man committed to an extent I would not have expected from him and he will never be forgotten. 

001. spaces

prompt: the space in the blanket between you and boyfriend!jimin that lets the cold air in, just had a fight so he’s mad or you’re mad and one or the other are fighting the desire to snuggle up for warmth. hope i explained it well! love your work ♡

There had been lots of instances where Jimin and I had fought. Like when I replaced the sugar with salt making his coffee taste extra bitter and spoiling his already foul mood on that particular Monday morning. Or when he had replaced my shampoo for blue hair dye and I had emerged from my shower crying. Our pranks were lighthearted and we had always made up before the day ended. 

However, this was new. 

As we lay in bed, Jimin’s body was curled away from mine. He lay on the edge of his side of the bed stretching the blanket as far as it would allow. The space between us letting the cold air caress our bodies robbing our warmth. The purpose of the blanket was questionable as it refused to warm our hearts. 

I gazed at the back of Jimin’s head and pursed my lips, trying to decipher what I had done wrong to make him behave this way. To make him curl so far away from my body as if any contact with my skin would end him. 

My mind wandered to the coincidental meeting I had with Jeongguk. As far as ex-relationships go, ours was the one relationship that had ended with both of us on good terms. So when Jeongguk asked me to have a harmless cup of coffee with him, how could I refuse? As we spoke Jeongguk continued to enlighten me with details on his soon to be fiancée who he was meeting that same evening to propose. 

Just as he had taken my number, to invite both Jimin and I to his wedding, Jimin had appeared. The concern was evident on his face when he saw Jeongguk and I together but he hid it quickly and brushed off any explanation I offered him saying it doesn’t bother him. 

Ah, I’m so dense. Of course he’s bothered. 

I let out a deep sigh and turned away from the ceiling to face Jimin again. I bit my lip and rolled towards Jimin as if I were as sleep. I wrapped my arms around Jimin’s torso, holding my body tightly against him. 

“Yah~ What’re you doing?” Jimin said, attempting to push my arms away. I tightened my arms around him and sighed into his shoulder, pretending to be asleep.

“I know you’re not asleep,” Jimin said, his hands pried weakly at mine, I intertwined our fingers and smiled into his shoulder as he let out a sigh of frustration. 

“I’m asleep,” I mumbled back, caressing the back of his hand with my thumb.

“No, you’re not.” Jimin said bluntly, I frowned at his tone, moving to untangle our limbs. However, he tightened his grasp on my hands, restricting my movements. 

“I know you’re not asleep because whenever you sleep you not only throw your arms around me but also a leg over me, completely immobilizing me.” Jimin said, his usual playful tone slowly creeping back into his voice. I fleetingly kissed the back of his neck, causing a shiver to run through him and wrapped my leg around him. 

“There,” I said, smiling against him. he abruptly let go of my wrist and turned around in my arms to face me, forcing our bodies to mesh perfectly. 

“This is better,” Jimin murmured, brushing his hand across the length of my face. He ran his hand down the length of my arm and intertwined our fingers once again. As I stared at his sleep filled eyes, I bit my lip unable to hold my words in anymore.

 “Jeongguk is engaged,” I blurted. Jimin looked up at me with his eyebrow raised. 

“He asked for my number so that he could invite us both to his wedding.” I continued, squeezing his hand in mine. Jimin’s lips quirked into a small smile as he quietly listened to my outburst.

“I know you said that you weren’t bothered, but I know you. I’ve been with you long enough to know when something has upset you. I’m sorry I didn’t clear this up sooner.” I murmured, my eyes drifting to out intertwined hands. 

“I wasn’t upset with you, I was upset with myself.” Jimin murmured, his hands playing with mine. 

“I was the one that acted like it didn’t bother me in the first place when I was dying of curiosity …and jealousy.” Jimin admitted bashfully, he quietly laughed at himself and ran a hand through his tousled hair. As he moved to turn away from me, I grasped his hand once again and intertwined our fingers. I leaned forward and placed a firm kiss on his unsuspecting lips. As I moved away from him, he gazed into my eyes, searching for an explanation. 

“The spaces between my fingers, in my bed, and in my heart are occupied by you, Park Jimin. I love you now and forever, don’t you ever forget it.”

konan headcanons for your headcanon needs

•she is the real leader of akatsuki- pein is just a figurehead. as she says, «behind every great man is an even greater woman».

•she is truly terrifying when she wants to be.

•all of the akatsuki (except for hidan and kakuzu) refer to her as «m'lady» or «lady konan».

•she cuts her own hair, and many of the other members’ as well.

•when drunk or on her period, she becomes very clingy and whiny. it’s very amusing to witness.

•she is the literal embodiment of the «mom friend».

•despite her serious demeanor, konan has a mischievous and playful side. sometimes she slips extra paperwork into pein’s desk and sees if he notices.

•she is the only one who can stop deidara and sasori’s arguments. they usually try to blame each other to escape her wrath.

•she loves it when the akatsuki get along.

•her and yahiko’s room was filled with origami cranes.

•she enjoys quilting and has several of her creations hanging from the walls.

•she wasn’t very good at cooking until she joined akatsuki. then, the other members’ incompetence forced her to learn so they wouldn’t starve.

•though she remembers everyone else’s birthday, she often forgets her own. this amuses the others, since she always remembers yahiko’s, and his is on the same day.

•she’s a dog person, but has a weakness for baby wildcats.

•if someone pisses her off even slightly, she’ll find a way to get back at them. once, she replaced the sugar in the coffee with salt.

•she’s usually quite busy, but sleeps in whenever she gets the chance.

anonymous asked:

What would VIXX be like if they were detectives and you were either their assistant or the person they were scolding the case for? Or even the one they were trying to apprehend? :0


  • world-renowned detective 
  • only works cases that even the government can’t solve, has an obsession with trying to solve cold cases that are over hundreds of years old
  • is a Gentlemen to the bone. wears nothing but the most expensive suits, addresses everyone formally, and carries a pocket watch in this day and age
  • doesn’t like working with partners, it isn’t his thing. like the government will offer him the opportunity to have the smartEST people in korea help him but he’ll always just wave the offer off because he’s got this on his own
  • he once accepted the help of a policeman and everyone was so shocked but in the end all he did was make the policeman run around making him coffee and at the end of the case hakyeon was like “thank you for all your effort!” and the policeman was like but i didn’t do anything,,,,,and hakyeon just smiled like nonsense, you made the best coffee ive ever had!
  • you meet hakyeon because you’re related to someone who disappeared mysteriously back in the seventeen hundreds and hakyeon just so happened to have taken on that person’s missing case as a side hobby and he shows up in front of your house
  • at first pretending to be a repairman and you’re like,,,,,,,are repairman always this handsome and courteous?? also you don’t understand half the big words he’s saying
  • but you let him in because your sink is broken and hakyeon,,,,probably because he’s like a genius,,,,actually does fix the sink and wipes his hands with this silk handkerchief he takes out of the suit he’s wearing
  • and in your head you’re doing math like suit + handkerchief + good vocabulary + beautiful face = sink repairman?? no no no it =,,,,
  • and it takes you more than normal but once hakyeon turns to suddenly ask you a question about your family tree you point at him and go
  • “detective cha?”
  • and he just smiles calmly and goes, “took you long enough to notice.”
  • that’s how he ends up sitting at your table, asking you various questions about where your parents are from, if you know this person or that person
  • and to be honest you didn’t even know someone in your family went missing that long ago
  • but hakyeon fills you in on what he knows and when he’s done, he says goodbye in his usual manner - with a bow 
  • but you don’t let him leave, you grab your coat and you’re like “you’re going to go investigate more aren’t you?” and he’s a bit surprised, but nods and you’re like “ill go with you!!!” 
  • and as i said before he’s not to excited about partners, and he does try to discourage you as you follow him out to the car outside but you’re determined to find out what happened to your relative and hakyeon,,,,,
  • looking into your eyes which are clear, and passionate,,,,,,
  • and actually interested in what he told you decides that it would be very “un-gentlemen” of him to say no to someone who is related to the victim and all that,,,,
  • so he let’s you come along and revisit some old sites and stop by a museum and question some more people about their relatives who knew the person at hand
  • and in the end hakyeon, in his mind, has managed to piece together a story that you like ???? could never have imagined
  • and hakyeon,,,,who sees how well you’ve kept up - even taking to recording notes on your phone while he questioned people,,,,decides to take you to his home and help you figure out his conclusion
  • and his home is just as elegant and as well kept as he is, everything is in the rich colors of mahogany and silver and with a kind of victorian twist to it
  • and hakyeon sits you down in front of a large board on which he’s pasted old photos of your relative who went missing, newspaper clippings, handwritten notes, scraps and all that and with the efficiency and lightness of a bird he goes from photo to photo, from article to article
  • and explains to you exactly what he believes happened on the night of  the appearance so so very long ago
  • it’s almost like you’re watching a documentary narration as he explains each clue and then at the end he turns to look at you and goes
  • “they never disappeared, they simply left to be with their lover in another country.”
  • and you’re like WOW how,,,how could you just get that from all this random old stuff, but you clap your hands and go “what a story! you could write a book!”
  • and hakyeon blushes a bit becuase ok he’s used to people being like “you’re a genius” or “it was so simple?” but,,,,,a book?? you obviously were more focused on the case than most people,,,,
  • and you get up to study his board closer and hakyeon is standing close to you as you point at pictures and ask questions
  • and in the dim light of the room, he sees your face glow and that same spark in your eyes he noticed before
  • and the way in which your hair smells faintly of something sweet when you lean up beside him,,,
  • and hakyeon has never been one for a partner because they just get in the way,,,but you,,,,,,,
  • there’s something about you that doesn’t get in his way,,,instead there’s something about you that comforts him
  • and when you look at him, smiling and go “do you have any other unsolved cases? another story you can share with me?”
  • hakyeon decides if there’s one person he wouldn’t mind having a long with him for the next case - it’s you


  • really silly private investigator who more than anything doesn’t solve actual cases, but just finds out if spouses are cheating on each other for a good amount of money
  • spends most of his time in his office with his legs up on the desk playing games on his computer
  • has an assistant that’s always trying to clean his messes, but literally the minute ken sits down at his desk there’s gum stuck in the keyboard and coffee spilled over files
  • his assistants always quit like two weeks in 
  • and it’s when the last one quits that ken puts out an ad for another, because god help him he wouldn’t be able to do his job without someone keeping him functioning
  • and by functioning is reminding him to take his keys and that no, wearing the long jacket and the fedora just makes him stand out more
  • and you, who’s just moved to seoul and has no job prospects whatsoever, decide that an assistant job can’t be that hard
  • until you meet ken
  • who,when you first come through the door asking to speak to the person in charge, is laying under thirty newspapers taking a nap
  • and you have to nudge him with your foot to see if he’s awake
  • and ken’s like OH RiGHT ,,, i DIDNT GO HOME LAST NIGHT!!! and you’re like yikes who is this crazy dude
  • but then ken dusts himself off and you’re like ok he’s kinda cute not the point and you’re like “where’s ??? investigator ken???” and ken grins and points at himself and is like “speaking!!”
  • and you’re like holy shit ok um and you’re like “im here for the assistants job here’s my resume-” but ken is just like “no need, you’re hired.  the first weeks a trial week though so no pay, but i will take you out to a complimentary lunch~”
  • and you’re like um ok but why are you here shouldn’t  you be investigating cases?? and ken laughs like “oh it’s alright, i already know that all our clients are all cheating on each other i just need to get photo proof but i can do it tomorrow”
  • and you’re like??????? what so you don’t solve like murders
  • and ken is like “an have to look at dead bodies? no sirrie”
  • and from that moment you’re like this,,,,,,this isn’t going to be an easy (or normal) job
  • and it isn’t because two weeks after you work there you’re really thinking of quitting because ken is like a child, both with clients and with you always making bad jokes and slipping over the trash he has scattered
  • but what stops you is that ken comes through the door with his hands both in casts and you’re like ????? and he’s like “i fell down the stairs in the subway,,,,,,” and you’re like how are you going to work ??? you need to take photos ???? can you use your foot
  • and ken just gives you a grin,,,,a very sly grin
  • and you end up in his car - driving to some shady looking street - holding the camera ken is supposed to be holding and ken’s like “you see the guy coming around the corner, that’s mrs. park’s husband, now see the lady over there? that’s his lover - quick snap a photo wait not yet ok,,,,now!”
  • and you try to take photos but you’re like kEN WONT WE GET ARRESTED
  • and he’s like no no i have license but you’re like OK I DONT THO
  • and you see mrs. park’s husband turn and you duck, stumbling a bit and falling into ken’s lap face first
  • and you hear him burst out into a chuckle and you’re like hitting his thigh like DONT and he’s like sorry sorry this is just so compromised,,,
  • and you get what he’s implying but you’re like DO N O T even think about it
  • but then you try to sit back up and ken’s like “don’t, he’s still looking” and you like move a bit so your face isn’t in his lap but like your leaning your head and shoulder against his chest,,,,which is broad btw and quite,,,,,muscular,,,,
  • but yeah you sit there like that for a bit and ken’s like “ok we’re clear!”
  • and you sit back up but the client’s gone and you’re like “i don’t know if i took enough pictures-”
  • and ken’s just like “if you ever need to cuddle into my chest again, feel free. i’d hold you but both my arms are broken and-”
  • and you’re like “don’t make me break your arms AGAIN”
  • ,,,,,,,,,but at the same time like it wasn’t ALL that bad,,,,,

Leo & Hyuk

  • leo is the veteran detective who has seen it all and is overworked and tired, while hyuk is the fresh blood detective who wants to pull his gun out every chance and go on high speed chases
  • and leo is supposed to mentor hyuk, but in reality hyuk doesn’t listen to a word he says
  • and leo has given up so he just let’s hyuk do whatever
  • but every now and then he has to hold himself back from knocking hyuk upside the head with a case file (sometimes he can’t hold himself and just. does it)
  • but hyuk always gets his revenge by replacing the sugar in leo’s morning coffee with salt
  •  which ends up with leo spitting the coffee all over himself and fellow policeman ravi and ken rolling on the floor laughing while hyuk runs for his life out of the precinct 
  • the two of them end up being assigned a case of a repeat jewel thief who has stolen from over five separate malls in the past month
  • and leo tells hyuk that no - he doesn’t need to bring a gun with him to the crime scene
  • but hyuk insists that the thief might still be there and leo is like yes, but we want the thief alive - but it’s too late hyuk is asking if the SWAT team will really show up and everyone’s like NO and he’s like “being a cop actually sucks”
  • so hyuk and leo show up to the last store that was robbed only a couple of hours before
  • and you’re still in the mall, wearing the stolen bracelet and watching from afar as the police scatter trying to figure out how you broke in and all that
  • and you just think it’s really funny,,,how hard they try and how they never get anywhere
  •  but you don’t notice the two new policeman, but hyuk nudges leo and shifts his eyes toward you - the sparkling bracelet on your arm only visible for a moment before it gets hidden by your jackets sleeve again
  • and hyuk and leo silently make an agreement,,,,but as always leo goes through with the plan hiding behind a pillar while hyuk,,,,,,,
  • hyuk decides that leo can go screw himself and runs straight toward you, going “hands up!”
  • and you, well hello you’re a thief, you get up quickly and push a trashcan over towards hyuk as you make your escape
  • and hyuk trip and leo screams at him for being an idiot as he chases after you
  • and so if leo catches you, he manages to corner you in a stairwell where the door you’ve reached is blocked
  • and you’re like,,,,,,,,,, trying to pretend that someone planted to bracelet on you after the robbery
  • but leo is watching you with narrowed eyes so you know he doesn’t believe you so you’re like “ok, fine. arrest me.” and leo does put you in handcuffs but he’s like “tell me how you managed to rob the store” and you just grin and shake your head like “uh-uh you can’t get me to talk, uncuff me and i will.”
  • and leo’s too seasoned of a policeman to know you’ll just sock him and run for it so instead he uncuffs one and cuffs the other to his own arm and he’s like “there, you’re practically free.” and you’re like lmao you call this free??
  • and he’s like “im not an idiot, but if you want both hands behind your bac-”
  • and you’re like fine whatever let’s walk out like this - but as leo takes a step forward you yank the cuffs and he teeters backwards with you and as he falls, you fall ontop of him
  • and leo is close to your face and you’re like “oops~ i didn’t mean it~” and he just,,,,well you’re close and you’re not exactly,,,,,bad to look at 
  • plus you’re pressed up against him and he’s like “get off” and you take a moment before you do and you don’t hesitate to notice how red he’s gone in the face
  • but then you also, very easily undo your cuff with the key you stole from his backpocket when you made him fall
  • and leo doesn’t see until he hears the ‘clink’ of the cuffs unlocking and he looks down but you’re already dashing up the stairs and laughing and you’re like
  • “i hope we see each other again officer-  i also left a giiiiiiiift~”
  • and leo is too stunned and angry, but he looks down at his wrist and sees that you slipped the bracelet onto his cuffed hand as well and he’s like HOW THE HELL
  • but all he’s left with is your laughters echo
  • and if hyuk catches you it’s because he’s still faster and more agile than you and ends up tackling you to the floor before you can escape
  • and as he’s arresting you, leo appears and hyuk just sticks out his tongue like he’s five like “hehe hyung i got them and you didn’t because your old and can’t run~~~” and leo is like shut it boy
  • back at the station hyuk and leo are questioning you about the other robberies and you’re like not interested in anything leo is saying
  • instead you keep making eyes at hyuk
  • and hyuk is kinda like,,,,,,what,,,,,because he’s oblivious until you’re like “id like to speak to officer hyuk. alone.”
  • and leo says something under his voice but leaves and hyuk sits down and is like “are you going to tell me how you did it?”
  • and you’re innocently like “did what? by the way are you single?”
  • and hyuk snorts like “huh, no!” and you can tell he’s lying 
  • because he’s still pretty young and the way you’re looking at him gets him a bit ,,,,,,hot under the collar if i may say
  • and you like lean over the table as much as you can and you’re like 
  • “officer hyuk, you’re cute. i think i know what i want to rob next.”
  • and hyuk is like “ah-aha! so you admit it, you did rob those places?”
  • and you just smile and bring your face a bit closer and you’re like
  • “can’t you uncuff me?~ it hurts~”
  • and hyuk is like “i,,,,,i can’t do that but if you sit down-”
  • and you’re like “i don’t want to~ i want to be closer to you.”
  • and hyuk swallows because,,,ok,,,,,your eyes are,,,,,,so,,,,pretty,,,but no you’re a thief. he just needs your confession
  • and so again he’s like “what do you mean when you say you know what you’re going to rob next?”
  • and you just giggle and hyuk has to fan himself because wow was your shirt this lowcut when they brought you in?
  • and you pull back slowly as if you’re going to sit
  • but then you stop and lean back in and you’re like
  • “i don’t steal jewelry or whatever. i only steal boys hearts~ and you’re next officer hyuk -”
  • and you tilt your head as if you’re going to lean up for a kiss 
  • and hyuk is sweating now but he pulls back and is like,,,,,,,, “officer leo will handle it from here!”
  • and he runs out with his hand over his mouth because,,,,,,goddammit you’re a criminal but why are you so ,,,,,,,,,,,, enticing,,,,,


  • really clumsy and easily emotional policeman who can’t work cases like murder or kidnapping because ok he’ll cry at literally anything
  • but it’s ok!! he doesn’t mind doing the usual responding to cats stuck in trees or loose grandmas wandering the park calls
  • and he’ll try to help anyone out with any problem - big or small
  • even though he looks intimidating and though, the whole tattoos and bright hair
  • he’s actual a soft guy at heart 
  • and some of the other policemen make fun of him a bit, but for the most part people tend to take care of him at the station because he has the best intentions 
  • you come in one day with your friends who is terrified because their little brother didn’t come in from school yet and it’s been two hours
  • and while every other policeman rushes past you and tells you to wait a moment, policeman ravi immediately pulls you both aside and asks what happened
  • and your friend barely manages to say something before she’s in tears, so you explain for her 
  • and ravi scribbles down some notes and nods along and he’s like ‘ok, let’s go to her brothers school first.’ 
  • and your friend wants to come, but she’s in hysterics so you tell her to wait at the station while you and policeman ravi investigate
  • and as you’re leaving you’re like “are you sure there’s nothing important you’re bust wi-”
  • and ravi waves his hand like no- there’s nothing more important than a a missing child 
  • and you nod because he’s right, but also like,,,,,,,are cops usually this kind??
  • but yeah the both of you show up at the school that says your friends brother left by himself hours ago when classes ended
  • and you decide there’s only two places he hangs out - the park or library so you try the library
  • and ravi almost turns the whole place over, even manages to knock down a display of books as he looks for the kid
  • and he’s so devoted that watching him makes you work even harder too
  • and so it’s a no in the library so you two split up to search the park when you reach it
  • and when you meet up ,,,,,, you light up because ravi is there,,,,, holding your friends kid brother on his shoulders 
  • and you’re like you found him!!!
  • and ravi is like “i did!! he was hiding on the playground, but i let him play with my badge and he agreed to come out!!”
  • and you’re like oh thank god, it’s good he’s safe!!
  • and you three head back to the station where you friend jumps up when she sees her brother and she’s like @ policeman ravi like how do i ever thank you
  • and she reaches up to kiss his cheek and ravi is like !!!! oh
  • but he just touches the skin and smile shyly
  • and you like look around but then lean up and kiss his cheek as well except this time ravi turns a bright BRIGHT red
  • and is like “t-t-thank you???” and you’re like no no thank you !!!! and he’s like ,,,,,still blushing
  • and then you remember to get the badge back from the little boy and you pin it back onto ravi’s lapel
  • and as you’re pinning it on he’s like “i could get used to this,,,,,”
  • and you’re like “,,,,hmm????”
  • and ravi is like OH NOTHING I SAID NOTHING
  • but his face betrays his feelings and you 
  • plus the entire damn world knows that 


  • undercover detective 
  • everyone believes anything he says because well,,,,look at him,,,,,could a face like that lie to you???
  • the answer is yes it could hongbin is not only a good detective but also a very good actor
  • was asked to pose as a bartender at a club where the police believed there was illegal drug activity and he’s been doing it for a couple of months now that all the regulars have become pretty well acquainted with him
  • is the heartthrob of the station he works at and,,,,,at the bar he works out
  • basically anywhere he goes people are bound to find him attractive and therefore he’s always the “most popular” on holidays
  • from gifts from fellow detective to gifts from the shady people who think he’s just a simple bartender
  • the other detectives have a joke about how hongbin won’t even need to call a bust, one of the suppliers will just gift him the drugs one day
  • you’re also a detective, set to go undercover with hongbin just as extra security measure 
  • and you’re supposed to just be like another regular who comes by the bar for drinks and stays at the end of the bar where if hongbin comes over to whisper something only you two can hear
  • but for the most part you don’t interact as to not bring up suspicion
  • until one night you and hongbin are both minding your own business, doing your jobs separately 
  • when one of the suspected drug dealers sits next to you and starts being unnecessarily touchy
  • and you’re a detective, you know how to handle this so you just reply calmly to his advances and say you need to step out for a moment
  • and hongbin notices and watches from the corner of his eye as you leave,,,,,,but then the guy follows you
  • and hongbin has always gotten a bad read on this guy but he knows he shouldn’t leave his post or he could blow his cover
  • ,,,,but also you’re a fellow detective to he makes up some excuse about taking out the trash
  • and he goes outback to see the guy has pinned you to the wall and he’s about to pull him off when you push the guy off with your foot and knock him unconscious with one swing to the cheek
  • and as he like blacks out on the floor hongbin is like “,,,,,,,you,,,,i was worried about you but,,,,,,i guess for no reason”
  • and you just smile and shrug and you’re like “it’s fine, good to know you have my back - but you could have given us both away.”
  • and hongbin gets a bit red and he’s like youRE RIGHT but you know,,,a fellow detectives safety is much more important,,,,,
  • and you’re like that’s so sweet but go back in before they get suspicious
  • and hongbin nods as you like squat down next to the guy you knocked out and check his pulse to see if he’s alive
  • and hongbin inside is like,,,,,wow,,,,they’re,,,,,,,really strong about you
  • and tbh he can’t stop thinking about you even though they take you off the case because you did knock out one of the suspected dealers so you  can’t show yourself in that bar
  • but when the bust happens, hongbin is glad to see that you’re on the task force
  • and you two help bring down the drug smuggling business in a police raid
  • but as you’re hauling away all the guys the one who’d tried to hurt you calls you a choice name as you’re handcuffing him and hongbin out of nowhere ‘accidentally’ knocks his elbow into the guy’s face and you’re like
  • ???????
  • and hongbin, whose never been super confrontational is like,,,,,,, “sorry, i still feel kind of bad about that night from before”
  • and you’re giggling like ,,,,,ok cute,,,,,don’t worry though we won in the end!!!
  • and hongbin is like yeah!!!! and it’s cute you’re both like kinda smiling to yourselves
  • but you end up smiling even more when you find out your next undercover job involves the two of you ‘pretending’ to be lovers and well,,,,,,you know,,,,,,,pretend might end up being something more hehe,,,,,

anonymous asked:

Laf and Tjeff competing bc they look alike so of they have to find out who is the best. Salty fights. Like someone replacing the sugar with salt before the other enters the kitchen. Trying to bribe their commune friends. Laf doesn't speak for a week with Ham after he fucks TJeff. No one knows how those 2 always seem to get locked out of their own offices. Their chairs' legs always giving out.Important papers getting lost just before an important meeting.They end up being bffs. Ever1 is confused

whispers:,,,, threesome,,,,, WHAT

i love this so much?!? good prompt



As prompted by Anonymous.

Fili x Reader: “Do me a favor? Stand back.”

Warnings: Food mention, bickering.

Word count: 1,074 (went a little longer than expected, but that’s okay.)

“Fili!” you grumble, moving past him with your arms full; you hug the massive sack of flour to your chest as you navigate your busy bakery, hoping to the deepest pits of your heart that there will be a break in the flow of customers soon. Needless to say, you had neither the time nor patience to deal with the drama going on in your personal life, regardless of what Fili thinks is an appropriate place to carry on with your bickering. “I can’t do this right now.”

“Y/N,” he says, sounding far too close to you to not be irritating. “How are we supposed to mend fences if you won’t talk to me? It seems hardly fair to either of us that we should carry on about our days angry with each other.”

“There are no fences here, Fili,” you reply. “This is a bakery.”

“And a fine bakery it is,” he answers distractedly.

Keep reading

Helmet Heist Master (TonyxReader)

And, because I’m amazing(or at least decent), here’s my FIRST EVER ONE-SHOT

“Tony, why are we here? I want to be in my bed.”


Currently, most of the Avengers were gathered in the living room, all invited by Tony. You, Natasha, Wanda, Pietro, Vision, Banner, Clint, Steve, Bucky, and Thor. Sam was lucky enough to be out right now.

Natasha sighs. “What case, metal head?”

Tony stands to face the rest of you. He surveys the room before saying, “someone in this room STOLE my Iron Man helmet, and I would like to know who!”

Was he serious? “Tony,” you say. “Why would any of us steal your metal clunker?”


“Because nobody cares enough to take it?”

You hear Steve chuckle beside you. “She’s right, you know.” Wanda and Vision nod in agreement. Tony paces the room, giving each of you dead stares.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y., lock all exits,” Tony says as he locks eyes with Pietro. “Nobody leaves until the case is solved. Not even you, Banner. You’re a suspect, too.”

“I just want to be in the lab.”

You walk over to your boyfriend. “Babe, you’re being ridiculous. Nobody here took your helmet!”

“LISTEN TO YOUR GIRLFRIEND, PLEASE!”, you hear Clint shout.

Tony grabs your hand. “Babe, someone DID take my helmet, and I’m sorry, but you’re a suspect, too!”

You hear the room gasp. “OOOO, HE JUST MADE HIS GIRL A SUSPECT!”



You let go of his hand and sit back on the couch, throwing your legs over Bucky’s lap. He was your best friend, so you were allowed to do that. “Okay, then,” you start with a slight smirk on your face, unusually keeping your cool. “Who are you accusing first?”


You and Bucky have to keep yourselves from laughing as Tony keeps ranting.

“You’ve been eyeballing my helmet for a while now. Just last week, you were seen trying it on! WHY WOULD YOU TRY IT ON IF YOU WEREN’T GOING TO TAKE IT?”

Before Thor could speak, all of the lights shut off at once. When they came back on, Thor was gone!

Everyone gasped and stood up quickly. “WHERE DID THOR GO?!?!”, Wanda exclaimed.

“So it WAS him!”, Tony shouted.

“How could it be him when the person who stole it had to have disabled the cameras? Thor doesn’t even know how to properly work a laptop,” Clint says.

“So why did he vanish?”, Steve asks.

“Maybe CLINT made him vanish so he wouldn’t cover for him! He knows how to disable cameras! He had the perfect opportunity to nab the helmet when I walked out of the lab to get lunch and he walked in!”, Tony says accusingly.

“That doesn’t make any sense,” Clint mutters.

“Give it up, Legolas! You stole the helmet and didn’t want us to blame Thor!”

Before Clint could say a word, the lights went off again. When they came back on, Clint was gone!

“AGAIN?!?!”, you shout.

“What the hell?”, Steve and Bucky say at the same time.

“Whoever stole the helmet is making people vanish,” Tony says quietly. “IT’S ONE OF YOU PEOPLE.”

Everyone starts arguing. It’s not until you hear “MAYBE IT WAS WANDA” that something happens. The lights go off, and when they come back on, Wanda is gone!

“WANDA,” Pietro shouts.

You can tell this is getting out of hand. “Tony, members of our team are disappearing. What the hell is going on?”

Tony doesn’t hear what you said. “Who is strong enough and fast enough to make these people vanish?”

“Maybe it’s the SUPER SOLDIERS working with PIETRO,” Natasha accuses. And with that, the lights go off. When they come back on, Steve, Bucky, and Pietro are gone. As of now, the only lasting people are you, Tony, Natasha, Vision, and Banner.

“The exits are locked. How on earth are these people vanishing?”, Vision questions.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y., open all exits,” Tony commands.

“Exits are locked, override initiated,” F.R.I.D.A.Y., responds.

“By who?”, Tony asks.

“The Helmet Heist Master,” she responds.

Tony throws up his hands. “THAT’S NOT EVEN A CLEVER NAME.”

You put a hand on his shoulder. “We need to find out what’s happening, Ton.”

“Agreed,” Vision adds. “It seems as if whoever we accuse is the one who vanishes.”

“So one of us is the Helmet Heist Master?”, Banner asks.

“Apparently so,” Natasha answers. “Even Tony is a suspect.”

The five of you stare each other down, not trusting anyone. Soon, the lights suddenly go off again, but this time, they stay off. A warped voice comes on the speakers.


The five of you start to panic. “WHOEVER THE HEIST MASTER IS, DON’T COME NEAR ME,” you hear Banner shout.


“I am, how you say, out,” Vision says as he phases through a wall and leaves.


“OYE QUE PASO,” Natasha exclaims, referencing In The Heights.

“BLACKOUT BLACKOUT,” you shout back, laughing.

“VANEEESSA,” Bruce shouts next.

“HAS ANYONE SEEN BENNY?”, Tasha screams.

“THIS IS NO TIME FOR JOKES,” Tony exclaims.

“Ton, wait,” you say.




“USNAVI, HELP MEEEEEEE,” Natasha shouts as she gets dragged away.


Tony is still running around, trying to figure out how to escape. You find Bruce and grab his hand, dragging him to a secret escape you built under the floor of the bar. There, you see the other Avengers.

“He doesn’t suspect anything?”, Pietro asks, snickering.

“Not a thing,” you answer. “Where’s the helmet?” Thor hands it to you, the eyes still glowing. You climb out of the hiding spot and place it on top of the bar, the glowing eyes facing Tony. After a minute, you hear a high-pitched shriek. The rest of you collapse in laughter. Wiping the tears from your eyes, you command, “F.R.I.D.A.Y., turn on the lights and open up all the exits.”

“Yes, Helmet Heist Master.”

The lights come back on and you all climb out of the hiding spot to see Tony standing on the couch with his helmet on. He’s waving a pillow around as a defense weapon. When he sees all of you laughing, he takes it off and throws the pillow to the side. “WHAT THE FUCK?”, he shouts.

You climb onto the couch and place a kiss on his nose. “Are you okay, babe?”, you say with a smile, trying to contain your laughter.

“What just happened?”

Bucky speaks up. “This is revenge for the stunts you pulled last week!”

Tony thinks back to the week before, when he replaced the sugar with salt, covered Bucky’s metal arm with magnets, blasted Justin Bieber music for 5 hours straight while he was at a meeting, and spread legos on the floors of every bedroom in the building. “THIS WAS CRUELER THAN WHAT I DID.”

“Crueler than blasting the Bieber of Justins for 5 hours?” Thor asks.

You wrap your arms around Tony’s waist. “Sorry, babe, but you had it coming. It was kinda my idea.”

“And you’re gonna pay,” he replies with an evil smirk on his face.

“What do you mea- TONY!”, you scream as he throws you over his shoulder and starts walking to the elevator. “CAN SOMEONE HELP, PLEASE?!?!”

Everyone else starts to laugh. Natasha plops onto the couch. “I have a feeling you won’t be too upset with this punishment.”

Kitchen Witchery- Cooking With Intent

The fun thing about being a kitchen witch is that you can do it every day, you don’t need anything that you don’t already have, you can work it into your already busy schedule with barely any change in routine, and it is fun.

Here are some simple ideas you can use when Working in the kitchen.

1. make your own spice-rubs/seasoning blends. Go by your own nose and what you like to taste to create spices that are uniquely yours. You can raid the cheap $1 section of the spice aisle and spend some time mixing and matching. Don’t be afraid to add salt for protective qualities, as well. While you are making your blend, think about what you want it to accomplish every time you use it. My last mixture was a home-made Italian seasoning blend I put on breads before I baked them for the Lammas Holiday. I wanted the herbs to convey my thanks to the gods for a successful harvest season, and I wanted to ask for blessings for a warm and happy home. I use this seasoning every time I bake a holiday bread now…it just seems right.

2. I saw an idea another witch had on making homemade sugar cubes and I loved the idea.

I did some experimenting and found that you can also use sugar in the raw or any sugar that is not powdered sugar. You can replace the water with a mixture 2 parts vanilla extract/1 part water for vanilla sugar cubes. The spice aisle sells other extracts as well. There are probably several different flavors you could create for your coffee or tea. I use silicone candy/ice molds to shape my cubes and I bake them on 200 degrees for 1 hour, then let them cool and then pop them out. Do not go above the liquid solid ratio of 3 teaspoons liquid/1 cup sugar. If you do, you will get a gooey sticky mess when you bake as the cubes will boil and try to become candy.  If you do not want to go to the trouble of molds or cookie cutters you can also roll the sugar out flat on a pan to the thickness you want the cubes, use a sharp knife to draw lines in the sugar where you want the cubes to break apart, and bake.

3. When baking you have the opportunity to draw or cut sigils into most anything. You could add a sigil to a cake before icing it. You could hide sigils in the patterns of the icing on cake or cookies. You could give blessings this way, or use this to enchant your own food for good luck, or good health. Art in the kitchen is always fun. As seen here:

4. Add a bit of salt to your mop water to help clean out negative energy. You can also experiment with making a deodorizing carpet powder- you know, the kind you pour down, then sweep up? Popcorn salt for spiritual cleansing, baking soda for deodorizing, essential oil for scent. mix in a bowl by whisk until the powder has absorbed the oil, add to a container you can shake out of, and voila. According to some online sources, adding Borax can repel fleas. You can do a search on homemade carpet powder for other ideas and recipes.

5. The important thing for a kitchen witch to remember is that anything can be made magical. In many places, the kitchen is considered the heart of the home. Where food and life comes from. Embrace that. Follow your heart and instincts.

Sub Drop

Subdrop and Aftercare
I thought I would write a little and provide some useful information about subdrop and aftercare, since I have just had to help a close friend deal with her first experience of subdrop and although she knew what it was, she did not realise that is what she was going through and did not know how to deal with it.
What Is Subdrop?
Subdrop is the emotional and physical symptoms felt by a submissive that is caused by tiring out the body and the release of adrenalin, endorphins, hormones and other chemicals that create a natural high during a scene, leading to a subsequent ‘come down’ afterwards, similar to the effects of illicit drugs. It can leave a sub feeling exhausted, depressed, sad and very emotional. This can include feelings of guilt, shame, embarrassment and other negative thoughts, but you should realise that this is simply your body’s natural response to a very intense experience, it is not your fault, you have done nothing wrong and you are not to blame.
Subs will often experience subdrop in different ways, some may feel the effects of it more intensely than others and it can last for varying periods of time, anywhere from an hour up to a few weeks afterwards, but it is only temporary and will eventually pass. It is important that you learn to recognise subdrop, because once you understand that you are feeling the effects of it, you can begin to address it and simply knowing why you are feeling that way will also help, especially when it comes to your emotions and feelings. Try to communicate, interact and stay in contact with your Dom or others, who can help you cope with your emotions and how you are feeling, by offering you support and talking you through it. Following the other advice I have included below will also help you recover from the effects of subdrop.
For the all the Doms, Dommes, Masters and Mistresses out there, this is just as crucial for You, as it is for Your sub. Subdrop is very real and not some myth, so aftercare and helping Your sub deal with the effects of it should be just as important as what You might do during a scene, especially as You are essentially responsible for Your sub feeling the effects of it and caring for Your sub is part of the responsibility that comes with being a Dominant. Aftercare should not be neglected and staying in contact with Your sub, offering them reassurance, validation and support will help during this vulnerable time and they should not have to go through this alone. Although some subs do prefer time to themselves, You should at least offer and ask what You can do to help, as everyone is different and their needs will vary.
If You do neglect aftercare and ignore subdrop, then the effects can begin to outweigh the benefits and enjoyment that Your sub may feel during a scene with You, which can cause problems for Your relationship with them and even end it. It is also worth pointing out that Dominants and switches can also feel a form of ‘drop’ after a scene, which I won’t address, but You can read more about it in the links I have provided at the end of this article.
So What Is Aftercare?
Aftercare is the name given to the process of being there with a partner for a sufficient amount of time, so they can feel safe, regain their emotional equilibrium and recover from the effects of a scene. It is equally important to recognise that aftercare is for both the Top and bottom, Dominant and submissive. If either person leaves too soon, then their partner may feel abandoned or a loss far exceeding the pleasure they might have felt during the scene.
Aftercare can include practical things such as making sure a sub is physically taken care of, treating any injuries, keeping them warm, allowing them to rest and making sure they have enough to eat or drink. Aftercare should also include attending to the emotional needs of a sub by offering them support, reassurance and validation. This can include showing them affection by cuddling or holding them, even gentle and loving sex, as well as asking how they are feeling, talking through the scene with them and their experience, answering any questions they might have and giving them a lot of positive reinforcement, such as saying how proud You are of them. This can continue after you have parted ways and for several days afterwards, by staying in contact and checking on their recovery.
Although like subdrop, everyone has a different experience and needs when it comes to aftercare, some for instance may want to be left alone to process this on their own and there is no right or wrong way, it simply involves doing whatever is necessary to help them recover.
How To Cope With Subdrop
A few ways you can help your body recover and deal with the effects of subdrop include:
ACE which stands for aftercare, contact with your Dominant and expression of positive reinforcement by the Dominant.
Drink plenty of water or a sports drink like gatorade, which help replace fluids, salts and potassium in the body that you have lost during a scene.
Eat foods to replenish the nutrients in your body, while you might crave comfort foods and sugary treats, which will not only replace the sugar and energy you have lost, but obviously give you some sense of comfort, the effects will be only temporary and will only leave you craving more, which is not ideal. Instead try to eat whole grain bread, meat, cheese and vegetables, while avoiding any foods that are white in colour, although milk is also very helpful.
Take some vitamins, especially the B-complex group that include folic acid, vitamin B6 and B12.
Be active and interact with others, even if you do not feel like doing so, as subdrop often leaves a sub feeling ashamed, depressed, isolated, confused and alone, so being by yourself and trying to cope on your own will only make those feelings worse. Even spending time with your pet can be helpful. Most importantly stay in contact with your Dominant and try to talk to them about how you are feeling, so They can help you cope.
Exercise will help release more endorphins, lessening the effects of subdrop, which is partly caused by the release of endorphins during a scene and the subsequent 'come down’ that occurs afterwards.
Try keeping yourself occupied, with a hobby or other activity which will allow you to clear your head or express your feelings.
Aroma therapy, warm baths, meditation and listening to soothing music is also helpful.
Try to stay warm.
Treat and care for any injuries you might have sustained during the scene, such as scratches, bites, welts or sore bottoms. I am not a doctor and I could not possibly hope to cover every potential scenario in this article, but generally applying basic first aid techniques and vitamin E cream will help your skin recover more quickly.
Rest and get plenty of sleep.
Try to get yourself ready before a scene, by getting plenty of sleep, trying to stay focused and preparing yourself for the experience.