I once knew every single one of your thoughts and ideas, passions and aspirations like the back of my hand.
Tonight, I struggle to remember even the exquisite details of your face, as if you are a faraway dream I had long ago.
Everything I wish I could say to Calum, in a fanfic.
The two lovers laid in the shaking bottom bunk of the large tour bus, and with the little light being shown through the thin curtain, she could see the marks and curves and dips in his features that made him exquisite to look at. Her back against the curtain, and his facing the wall, they stared. They didn’t know for how long, but time seemed like a distant fantasy and they were living on endless minutes. Those minutes turn to hours, and around 3 am, she knew they made a terrible mistake of staying up.
“You know you have an interview in about 3 more hours right?” She slightly smiled, inching closer to hear his voice that hadn’t been heard ever since dinner.
“Being up with you is worth it.” He said this with a staight face, but that was just Calum. He never dared to show too much emotion, in fear of becoming completely vulnerable. It just wasn’t like Calum to laugh at every joke or cry when someone died, he was almost like a brick wall. So she understood this about him, and accepted this new found trait, and actually, she grew to love it.
“It won’t be worth it when your makeup person has to use 6 tubes of concealer to cover up your terrible eye bags.” She rubbed under his eyes with her thumb, and studied the growing droopiness of his bags. But never the less, he was still beautiful.
“You should teach me how to use that thing, it could come in handy with me being on tour with you all year long.” He leaned over to kiss her softly, and then kissed her nose, making her move so much closer than their foreheads touched. Her fingers found their way to Calum’s slight curls on the back of his neck, and stayed staring into his glissening eyes.
“You won’t need it Cal, you’re so handsome already. No matter how bad you’re eye bags get, no matter how chubby your cheeks are, none of that matters to me. You could cover it up with all the makeup you want, but I’ll still love my brown skin Maori boy underneath.”
He huffed at her sudden emotional outburst.
“Where’d that come from huh?”
“Ever since I’ve met you babe, and I would constantly hear those reporters and even fans talking about how much weight you’ve gained, or how quiet you are during interviews, or how you’re just a man who sleeps around and doesn’t actually believe in relationships and connections. It’s never settled with me. And I know it gets to you too.”
Calum shook his head and tried to push her head back onto his chest so she’d sleep and let this whole thing go. Calum had parts of himself he knew he’d never like. But would he change them? Probably not, even if they were fixable. He didn’t want to fit society’s standards, or even his fans standards. Cal’s always been true to who he is. And if that’s a beer drinking, bass playing, smoking, brown skinned boy then he’d be just alright with that.
“It doesn’t get to me. I know how you feel about me, I know how the boys and crew feel about me, I know how my family feels about me, and I know how my fans and the rest of the world feels about me.”
She shot her head up looking just slightly upward at him.
“But do you know how you feel about yourself?” It was more of a statement than a question, and Calum’s gripped tightened on her, his lips drawing into a straight line.
“To some degree. I’m only 20, and being 20 you should be close to figuring out who you really are. Sure, I have my wonderful career, with opportunities I would never get the chance to experience otherwise. But sometimes that’s not all there is.”
He paused before saying what was to come.
“I don’t like not have privacy anymore. I don’t like seeing my name in headlines with untrue stories being told. I don’t like being a doll, getting made up almost everyday, and I have little to say about what goes on my face and body. I don’t like not being able to go online or on TV and tell the exact truth about my life, and having to keep some things like you to myself and the guys because it could mess up my reputation.” His eyes started becoming glossy, as his forehead laid on hers, eyes closed.
“I don’t like being away from you. I don’t like having to leave for months and come back to your apartment that I can barely remember. I mean, heck, I forgot where your bathroom was not too long ago.” She laughed, feeling yourself getting choked up and bringing her hand to stop the overflow of tears.
“I don’t like having to shield you away from my life. I don’t like not being able to show my love in more ways than I already do, which isn’t even enough. I don’t like being to guy that people talk down on because of my smoking and drinking habits, when in reality I’m perfectly healthy and happy. I’m such a happy man, Y/N, but I can’t share any of it. I’m trapped.”
“Oh baby, you are so much more incredible than you believe you are. Instead of thinking of those awful things and using them to hate yourself, look at the beautiful things you provide for people. Your fans, for example. You’ve given them an outlet: The New Broken Scene. They are able to listen to Sounds Good Feels Good with teary eyes and open hearts, relating to you, Michael, Luke and Ashton. They hear your bass line, and move to the beat even if they don’t have rhythm. You’ve opened up your journal entries to them, giving them an inside look into what goes on in that tragically beautiful head of yours, and makes them feel that much closer to you. Sure, you’ve had to give up some of the most important things in life. Privacy, truth, freedom. But when I see all you’ve done for millions of people out there, I’d say it was well worth the sacrifice. And I get to watch you open up your heart to thousands of people this year on tour alone.” She kissed his nose as a gesture of comfort. He smiled at her, pulling her even closer to his chest, feeling the overwhelming beat of his heart. Calum was happy.
He had his flaws, hell, we all do. His were just more public. He could walk around in public picking his nose and everyone would be calling him gross. But would that stop him from inspiring people to live outside of their comfort zone? Fuck no. He’d go out and do it again, and again, and again. His mistakes don’t define him. His flaws don’t define him. The things he hates about himself do not define him. They’re what makes him, Calum Hood. The one and only, nobody else could be a better Calum. And that is why, she, along with millions more, adore him.
I’m lagging so hard in the writing game. Still doing part 2 of “I Would Never Call It Love” if you guys are still into it. Much love goes out to my boy Calum, who deserves more love than he gets. And I know it’s Michael’s birthday and I wish him the best 21st fucking birthday, now he’s legal to drink in America so woop.
That was hands-down the best series finale in TV history. And we’ve had sherlock almost getting blown up to pieces, jumping off the roof AND shooting someone in the face.
The script was nothing but just perfectly exquisite! It had me screaming out loud, shaking my head laughing, pulling my hair out, and sobbing uncontrollably. That was the quickest 90 minutes I’ve ever experienced!!!
And that ending… where Sherlock and, his long-lost sister, Eurus play the violin flawlessly and harmoniously. And 221B being brought back to life. The balance in universe has been restored.
Tell me like you’re whispering into my ears // Don’t be like a prey // Be smooth like a like a snake…
Moonlight Sonata plays through the
speakers of the small desolate bookstore as I walk through each isle, looking
for my small and fragile prey. The first time I had visited the bookstore had
been after I had devoured a rather tasty meek coffee shop employee, in search of
some light reading. That was two nights ago, when I first saw her.
She had her head down reading a book placed on
the register. The glasses adorning her face appeared two big for her small
heart shaped face, as she worked to adjust them on her face. Her eyes caught
mine in that moment, her cheeks flushing a red. Remembering the smell she
brought forth as she blushed, she smelled exquisite. Slipping into character
quickly, my eyes quickly left her face as I shrunk in on myself, making my size
less imposing, weak. Adjusting the
round wire frames on my face, I approached the counter, sliding a tattered copy
of Romeo & Juliet across the
Happy 44th Birthday to this amazzzzzing woman, I always have a hard time putting into word how much llalalallalalove Winona and why. I can relate to her so much and she’s just such a kind beautiful soul and wherever she is today, i hope she has an amazing birthday!
tagged by the most exquisite star goddess @asteriea to post my favorite filter ☺️💐 actually quite some time ago but i didn’t have a favorite filter then. i just discovered this one and i think it’s so cuteee. tagging: everyone who sees this!
The wonderful thing about this drama is the delectable way it has been written. The writer keeps the tone exactly balanced between seriousness and lightness, which is not an easy thing to do. The little notes like the Goblin checking in on that boy he saved years ago or the friendship that is burgeoning between him and the Grim Reaper keeps the viewer engaged. We all know that the pain is coming but we can go there laughing till we cry.
Anyway, this piece I found exquisitely done:
That look of pain on his face and the DRAMATIC IRONY, you guys. We know, he knows, everyone knows except the girl who is going to be an instrument to his death and ooffff, it’s going to hurt. I love how there is a whisper of pain but it doesn’t try to converge like storm clouds all over the horizon.
I can the next bit: Grim Reaper as a Therapist: A Comedy
But hey, at least he offers the best help he can…
It’s not his fault it isn’t exactly comforting.
I adore Go Eun’s acting in this drama. She nails the adolescent schoolgirl so perfect.
Poor kid. Her interpretation of marriage and the reality of it are so very different. It’s going to hurt when she realizes what she has to do.
But seriously, the following scenes were the funniest.
I want the Goblin’s house.
When you bride summons you…
IS SHE A DESERTED WIFE? Haha, this was so adorablee.
The caption for the next one:
“How dare you make the flowers bloom?”
The Importance of Dramas
When no one can see the dude you are talking to…
When the Goblin fell in love (conveniently with his bride)…
So I don’t know if it’s love… I mean, who was the Queen to him? His unrequited love? Sister? Relative? It’s pretty certain that the Goblin feels something for Eun Tak but I don’t know if I am convinced it is romantic love. Precisely because she is so young and innocent…but maybe that’s why he likes her? Because she’s young and innocent.
The power disparity is immense and I like that Eun Tak notes it and mentions it. I also noted that drama time is 2008 which means something will happen to bring it to 2016. Time jump?
And maybe the Grim Reaper really is the king and Yoo Inna who needs more screen time is the reincarnation of the queen.
Maybe Deok Hwa is going to be a love rival for the Goblin which is like saying maybe a peanut is going to fight ferrero rocher for position as a dessert…but you get what I mean.
My opinion on this: Oh my gosh he is absolutely perfect, devilishly exquisite, roguishly good-looking with that blood stain on his face that make him more mysterious but so, so handsome with that striking pose with two katana blades.
My little brother’s opinion: He looks like Kakashi without his mouth cover/mask
“[A]nd then he gaped, for coming down the stairs and into the room was Jerusha
Bromley, twenty-two years old, slim, dark-eyed, dark-haired, perfect in
feature and with gently dancing curls which framed her face, three on
each side. She was exquisite in a frail starched dress of pink and white
sprigged muslin, marked by a row of large pearl buttons, not flat as
one found them in cheaper stores, but beautifully rounded on top and
iridescent. They dropped in an unbroken line from her cameoed throat,
over her striking bosom, down to her tiny waist and all the way to the
hem of her dress, where three spaced bands of white bobbin lace
completed the decoration. Abner, looking at her for the first time,
choked. ‘She cannot be the sister they thought of for me,’ he thought. ‘She is so very lovely.’” - James A Michener, Hawaii (172-73)
Michener, James A. Hawaii. New York: bantam, 1966.
Carol is undeniably a revelation. A subtle romantic film, Carol’s power is exquisitely defined in the expression on Therese Belivet’s (Rooney Mara) face upon seeing Carol Aird (Cate Blanchett) for the first time. The look of love at first sight, as if Carol were the answer to questions Therese had been subconsciously asking her whole life, the film’s beauty and elegance is defined in that look. This film is the answer to the question: What is the most authentic romance film in years? Though I may not be gay or a woman, the romance here transcends any boundary between humanity. In this, director Todd Haynes crafts a truly universal romance film that is for the entire world to behold in awe.
The same look on Therese’s face is shared by Carol at the very end. As Therese walks slowly over to her and Haynes expertly uses slow motion to emphasize the moment, the look of subtle peace and joy highlights what this film does so well. It is not a teenage romance in any way. It is not excessive. It is not over-the-top. It is not cinematic love. Rather, it has a raw authenticity that is truly impossible to ignore. Instead, it consumes you and absorbs the viewer into this lush world that makes you experience the same love and pain as the characters.
This authenticity is translated into the screenplay, which is a thoroughly poetic and moving experience. The characters of Therese and Carol are so well defined, it is as if they are real human beings and this is merely their tale. The real emotions of love, pain, joy, and hurt, demonstrated by these women is impactful to the very core. However, its real success comes in the dialogue. Therese constantly shooting down Richard (Jake Lacy) and his offers to go away to Europe with him, while immediately accepting an offer to go away with Carol. The encounter between Carol and Harge (Kyle Chandler), in which Carol explains how having her daughter only for a short amount of time and being true to herself is better for her daughter than having her all the time and “living against her own grain”. Carol not only is a revelation for its power in terms of LGBT romance, but also in its communication of its character’s feelings. Instead of explicitly telling you how they feel, it leaves it open for you to pick up on their intentions. Above all of other elements, this is what makes the film feel so authentic. They act and speak like real human beings who express their feelings, but not directly. These women leave bread crumbs for the viewer to figure out what really makes them tick. Not only does this indicate incredible trust given to the audience by Haynes, but it also highlights his trust in the writing and the actors to convey meaning.
Visually, the film is equally as stunning. Cinematographer Edward Lachman’s camera is a magnet for beautiful shots. The heavy reliance upon reflections and mirrors is what truly caught my attention the most, especially when considering when they are utilized and the overall meaning of the film. Carol, above all, is a film about being true to one’s self. Carol could have stayed with Harge and kept her daughter. Therese could have married Richard. Yet, neither felt truly satisfied in that life when without one another. Lachman captures this in his use of reflections. In one particular sequence, Therese goes with Carol to visit her home, with Richard bidding Therese goodbye before she leaves. As they drive, reflections abound. Symbolically, this most closely represents the double life being led by these women. A mirror merely reflects who you are, but is not you true self. It is other. This reflection is Therese’s life with Richard. The camera then juxtaposes these shots with her in the car with Carol, highlighting how that is her true self. She is meant to be with Carol and it is her path to happiness.
Lachman and Haynes also use a notable color scheme for the entire film, with many shots being covered with an apparent green filter. These shots are accented by the heavy use of brown, red, and yellow. Interestingly, when Carol first visits with Therese, she is wearing red. However, after her daughter is taken from her and the two women see each other once more, it is Therese wearing red. As red often represents passion, one must assume that this is foreshadowing. Initially, Carol was the one pursuing this relationship. Therese knew she was infatuated with her, but was not confident enough to pursue her. Carol, meanwhile, had experience in the area and did pursue her. However, once her daughter leaves, she is more concerned with being reunited with her daughter, not being with Therese. The opposite is true for Therese, who has blossomed and is filled with passion and wondrous feelings for Carol. This initial power balance is encapsulated in the mise en scene on multiple shots. One such depicts Carol in the foreground, as a large and domineering figure compared to Therese. A later shot showcases Carol standing above Therese with her hands resting on her shoulders. Both indicate that, in this relationship, Carol has the power.
Finally, the cherry on top of the film is score. Carter Burwell’s score hits all the right notes and truly highlights the setting and feelings of the film. This is a very cozy and warm film. The colors certainly highlight this as well, as does the setting. With the green and red clearly representing Christmas, the brown and yellow for me felt like a fire. The score and this color scheme bring about feelings of warmth, as one sits next to a fire on a cold day around Christmas. This feeling is universal and one that everyone knows, but is hard pressed to be able to put into words. Yet, Carol encapsulates this feeling and spreads it around for all to be embraced within.
Overall, Carol is a truly brilliant work from Todd Haynes that I must rewatch. With tremendous performances from Rooney Mara and Cate Blanchett, terrific direction from Haynes, lush visuals, and an equally moving score, this film checks every box.
Former Professor Severus Snape was slumped forward in an emerald green chair, letting his dark locks cover his features. His slender fingers were entwined between the end of his knees, hardly hanging together. His usual black robes fit tightly against his form, and the only spot of white peeked out from the edge of his sleeve near the lengthy row of buttons.
All together, he looked like a heap of black inside one of the most exquisite paintings Hogwarts presently had on their walls.
Hermione’s face fell to see the once tall and stout man looking so defeated. Biting her lip hard, she felt her nerves beginning to spike, yet came to the conclusion that she was standing there far too long to simply walk away without saying something…
The sheer amount of vulnerability we see in Luke’s face during his final fight is exquisitely heart-wrenching and beautiful. This is the son who will always love his father, even after said father cuts off his hand and destroyed the perfect dream image of himself since childhood inside the young Jedi’s mind. What I personally adore here, is that Luke’s believes in his father’s goodness knows no bound. Every time Vader speaks; it is not the 23 years old man that looks back at him. No. The helpless child who always wanted his father to come through for him is. We see Luke go through hell, yet he still believes his father will save him. That his father will choose him and be on his side as he always should’ve been. He cries desperately not just for the galaxy hopeless fate, but for his father’s doomed soul. Luke knows he can’t bring himself to hate this man. How could he? When he knows, that without a doubt, his true father will break through for him. He can feel it. He can sense the silent war inside of the sad man trapped behind the mask and for that alone, Luke’s love for Anakin only increases when he finally does. Luke’s heart breaks more as he watches the father he always wished for wither away and die after sacrificing himself to save his son, Luke.
By Lughnasadh, The Sun God has already begun his downward journey, facing now toward the dark frosts of Winter. The Goddess, however, never wanes. She simply changes appearance. At Lughnasadh, She wears a face of exquisite abundance. During the season of high Summer the bounty of our planet is in full swing. We reap the benefits of fresh fruits, vegetables, and herbs. This is a time when most of us experience exceptionally good health and robust living.
Lughnasadh marks the last heyday of the Sun God. Beneath the Barley Moon and Summer stars we, too, enjoy the expiring passions of the season. Marriages are often entered into at Lughnasadh as well as at Midsummer, and as Robert Burns tells us, it is a “happy night” that he spends among the cornfields with his lover. Lughnasadh is a tome when the symbolic aspects of the life-sustaining elements of grain spill over into every part of life.
Lughnasadh marks a turning point in the Earth’s life cycle. Although Summer is hot and bountiful, more visible signs of the Sun’s waning strength lie just around the corner in Autumn’s fallen leaves. During this time of year, Witches use herbs to bring good fortune and abundance in their cooking, healing, potions, and spellwork. All grains, seeds, herbs, and flowers gathered now can be dried for later use during Winter or for decorating the altars of future Sabbats. Like herbs, grains are considered sacred and should be harvested with a magically charged “golden” sickle.
In many regions in the northern hemisphere, Lughnasadh is berry-picking time. In the British Isles, bilberries are particularly plentiful. Gathering bilberries at Lughnasadh is an ancient ritual that has bearing upon the Summertime harvest as a whole. If the bilberries are bountiful, the crops will be plentiful. Just about every herb, flower, and grain reaches its peak of color, flavor, and magical potency in Summer. Garlic is a particularly versatile herb that is used for protection against negative energy and to cleanse and purify the body. Marigold helps us to communicate with Faeries and increase psychic ability. Moss is for financial gain, and at Lughnasadh vervain is used for wealth as well as protection. During this season of marriages, yarrow is a common ingredient in wedding gift philtres and oils for love and union. Hops, used in flavoring beer and ale, favorite Lughnasadh beverages, are also good for sleeping and healing. Witches make healing compresses and teas from comfrey to enhance the healing of broken bones, scrapes, and bruises.
Following is a list of herbs to use in your magic during the Lughnasadh season:
Queen Anne’s Lace
Our imaginations can easily be taken in by the magical charms of stones. They are simple enough in themselves, yet we watch and touch and remember, sometimes brooding upon their eternal composition. Witches believe that stones, despite their seeming lack of animation, are objects of wisdom and great positive energy and, like water, are one of the purest of all of Nature’s forms. For untold centuries we have paid attention to the effect of light on form. The geometric forms of crystals reveal fresh new perspectives that aid us in preparing for the future.
At Lughnasadh, as at all the Sabbats, we affirm the time-honored importance of stones as our friends. In addition to prosperity and growth, we seek confidence to face what lies ahead and a strengthening of our bond with Nature. The constancy of each individual stone on Earth centers on a mystical kind of compressed raw energy. Stones contain dynamic qualities and to us they exhibit a magical sensibility seemingly at odds with their concreteness. Within the core of each lies imprisoned, like the Young God himself, the concentrated, exquisite spirit of energy and light. Realizing these truths about about the magic of stones is particularly helpful during this turning point on the Wheel of the Year, when we straddle Lughnasadh’s amazing paradox of abundance and loss.
Following is a list of stones to use in your Lughnasadh magic:
(Source: Celebrate the Earth A Year of Holidays in the Pagan Tradition by Laurie Cabot with Jean Mills)