suagr baby

Mr. BIG

So about Mr. BIG he is CEO of his own company which is based in Boca Raton Florida, but he frequently travels to NY for business. He has been married twice and recently divorced from his second wife and seeking a young attractive women to spend his free time with. Mr. BIG prefers women of color, both of his ex’s are Spanish, wish works in my favorite! He flew me out to Florida for our first meet. Ladies I wouldn’t suggest flying out to see a POT you have never meet before. But I felt comfortable enough to do so because we were corrresponding for about 2 weeks before and he provide me with first and last name plus the name of his business. Of course he covered the flight fee and also booked a hotel for me to stay in (which was about 2 blocks away from his beautiful apartment). I stayed in FL a total of 3 days/2 nights. The first day my flight was delayed so didn’t arrive until 4pm, he arrange a driver to pick me up at the airport (the driver had a piece of paper with my name on it and everything, just like you see on TV). After settling in and taking a much needed nap he picked me up from the hotel and we went to dinner. He gave me the choice of picking the restaurant, knowing his favorite is Italian I decide to go with that. He brought me to a very upscale place, immediately when we walked in he was greeted warmly by the employees he’s a regular and everyone knows him there. The food was simply too die for! I was beyond nervous because this was my FIRST POT date ever, and really didn’t know what to expect. But to my surprise everything went great I actually enjoyed myself, conversation was easy and it flowed, there was a natural connection. Before he order our desert he placed envelope on the table and pushed it towards and I politely placed it in my purse. After dinner we went back to his placed, we kissed and things started to become “hot and heavy”  before things got out of hand I told him I wasn’t ready to be imitate with him yet. Just like a gentleman he his he STOP right in his tracks and asked if I was ready to go back to the hotel.  Finally, when I got back into my hotel room I open the envelope which had 1,500 dollars inside. The next day he was super busy with work so we weren’t going to meet until later that day. So I took it to myself to do some exploring, I went to the beach and grab some lunch. Date night 2, went smoothly just like the first we went back to his placed and watch a couple of movies, until I could no longer keep my eyes open. We did kiss and snuggle on the couch together but we didn’t engage in any sexual activities. I flew back to NY the next day 1,500 richer and I ain’t have to pop no pussy. Since then we talk regularly and he will be flying out to NY next week for business, so we get to see each other. Today he transfer 1000 to my PayPal account for Valentines Day. He’s a keeper! 

Sugar Baby Checklist

 As a sugar baby, I personally think it’s always important to list the things that I want to do or use, with the money I acquire via sugaring. I’ll admit, I have a bad habit when it comes to spending money, but budgeting and organizing a list for purchasing things that I need versus want is pivotal. Everyone should be able to make rent or bills on time.
* Monthly Allowance of 4K 
   - 300 for rent
   - 70 for phone bill 
   - 200 for makeup
   - 500 for clothing 
   - 700~2000 for updated headshots 
   - 900~2000 left over to save in a bank account 

* Brand new furniture for my room including:
   - A bed 600~800
   - A new mattress ???
   - A vanity table and chair 300~400
   - A side table <100
* Other accessories for my room including:
   - Paint <100
   - Mirror 30~130
   - Sheets, Shams, etc., <300

* A minimum of 5K in the bank at all times, hopefully it will be 10K instead. 

* Luxury items that I will not buy myself 
   - Bamboo Classic Blooms Top Handle ( Gucci; $2,490)
   - Soul Rockstud Sandal ( Valentino; $945)
   - Mike Sandal ( Chloe; $795)
   - Crystal- Embellished Satin Sandals ( Gianvitto Rossi $1,195)
   - Lauren leather D’orsay flats ( Chloe; $590)
   - Satin ankle-tie flats ( Gianvitto Rossi; $695)
   - Astro Couture Ankle Boots ( Valentino; $2,145)                                                    - Padlock Metallic Shoulder Bag ( Gucci; $1,750)
   - Pigalle pump( Louboutin; $675)
   -  Baroque Pump ( Ralph&Russo; $1,390)
   - Padlock Python Shoulder Bag (Gucci; $3,800)
   - Lowland Boot ( Stuart Weitzman; $875)
   - Lilith leather Top Handle Bag ( Gucci; $3,500)
   - Sylvie embroidered leather top handle bag ( Gucci; $3,500)
   - Dionysus Arabesque shoulder bag ( Gucci; $3,290)

* An  international vacation for 3-7 days at least once a year

Of course, the last half of this checklist is a goal I aim to work toward in eventually acquiring; It’s a new year, and hopefully I can accomplish all of these things. 


Hopefully everyone in the sugar community can too with their own personal goals or checklists. 

Cheers to Myself for Not Falling for Another Man's Bullshit

So a little update since last I wrote, I was on the hunt for a new backup SD because one of mine flaked and it’s always better to have more than one. K? So here I am on the hunt.

I’ve gone on several first dates. One second but I’ll get to that in a minute. Some men I’ve kept in contact with and hope to see again. Some I’ve had to politely decline their offers of arrangements because they were just too fucking annoying. And others I knew weren’t serious and stopped communication on my part to see if they’d pursue - they didn’t pass my test. So lead to one POT who accepted my allowance amount and we made plans to meet tonight for an intimate date.

Keep in mind me and tonight’s POT had only discussed number and delivery method - cash. We had never discussed timing of said allowance delivery because to me, it would be pretty fucking obvious - when we start the fucking arrangement.

So I get over to his place - which is perpetual bachelor hideous keep in mind, but my eye was on the prize. He’s complimenting me, telling me all these lovely things. We kiss a little. He shows me fucking “thank you” cards from a previous SB (allegedly, could have been his handwriting). And then he says in his most sultry voice “Let’s get naked”.

Ew. Ugh, also keep in mind he’s like probably three times my age and so thin I could probably snap him like a twig if I wanted to. So he’s like the least intimidating person in the world and I’m experienced right? So I’m not afraid to ask for what I’m due.

So I look at him with my big innocent eyes and I say, “Well, I’ve told you my past experiences and I would like to verify you have my gift before we get intimate”. Standard.

He’s visibly flustered. He wasn’t expecting that. So he goes into this literal fifteen minute explanation of why he pays allowances at the END of the month, after agreed upon eight dates. Kind of confusing actually. Eight dates or every four weeks or at the end of every calendar month. He never specified.

This fucker gave me every excuse in the book. He sited facts and figures of ‘dozens’ of other sugar babies he’s known and apparently that’s how they ALL do things. Payment at the end of the month. He went on and on about wanting to establish a long term relationship and didn’t want someone to run out on him after one night. Which duh, I wouldn’t do as long as my allowance comes in a timely manner. But he didn’t see it that way.

Then he starts laying it on thick. Of course I tell him I’ve been screwed over before and that’s just not how I do things - very politely of course. I never turned into a bitch. I smiled and was gracious the entire time. He tells me he wishes I would have told him this all BEFORE hand. Hinting that I was wasting his time. Mother fucker you’re wasting MY precious time.

Anyway, he talks about how he wants to make sure I’m not bringing him drama and that I’m a good lover (test drive bullshit you know the drill), starts talking about what a skilled lover he is (omg I almost burst out laughing at this point), how much fun I was going to have, etc etc.

And I said, again very respectfully, ‘I understand and I can respect all that. But that’s not how I operate.’ Again, he wasn’t expecting that. I’m sure he was expecting me to be a pushover and just go fuck him but I’m no fool. He looks at me very irritated and says, 'So are we done then?’ And I tell him with a smile and a fakely regretful sigh, 'I guess so.’ Again, I don’t think he was expecting this.

He gets up wordlessly, back to me the whole time and opens his front door. I walk out it with no chip on my shoulder and tell him kindly, 'thank you for showing me out.’ He slams the door behind me.

End of that arrangement.

Girls, ladies, women, sugar babies.

We are better than this.

We do not have to put up with men’s bullshit if we don’t want to. Remember that. None of this nonsense about checking 'sexual compatibility and chemistry’. None of this, 'I’ll take care of you later’ or the ever so hilarious 'I’ll make you come real good.’

In the famous words from one of my favorite movies, Hot Chick - Boys are cheats and liars.

Get yours first.

Don’t fall for the sob stories and the fairy tales.

It’s all lies.

Until next time sweetnesses

WTF!

I get so sick of seeing bad wigs, weaves, leave outs, & extensions on sbs and escorts. Like how dare you claim to be worth 5k a month taking selfies in a dirty room with a dirty mirror looking like you didn’t brush your teeth this morning. I’m not understanding. As a black woman in general we have to be a 20 on a 1-10 scale to get half the respect a bitch that’s a 3 of any other race gets. I’m appalled by the actual fucking facts of life rite now. If you’re going to market yourself at something be the BEST to ever do it invest in great photos, makeup, hair, etc. We all start out somewhere but fake it till you make it not everything has to be $200+ the way you present and carry yourself means the difference between making a $50 outfit look like a $5k one.

A few lessons I've learned from my last SD relationship

•Be yourself within your sugar persona… Makes sugaring a lot less mentally/emotionally taxing

•Be upfront with your needs and expectations… Don’t settle on potential

•Learn how to communicate effectively

• NEVER come off as desperate, even if you are! Guys will take advantage of that intentionally and unintentionally

• Trust your gut when making decisions concerning your SD (like moving in together 😅)

YOUR PUSSY, YOUR RULES!

Im ranting today. 

yesterday I was talking to a friend (Vanilla) of mine who was crying to me about a date she went on like 2 weeks ago. She met a man on tinder and after messaging back and forth for about a week, he finally asked her out to dinner. She said the dinner was great. He was sweet, a good listener, gave her a few compliments and so on. They both had an entree AND dessert, the bill rounded up to about $150 (she was very impressed). Then she starts talking about how HE ASKED to come in after dropping her off. She said yes. They had sex. She sent him a text and It has been 2 DAYS. Its all crickets on his end. 

BITCCHHHHHH when I tell you it took everything for me not to slap her. E. VERY. THING! I get so upset when I hear things like this for many reasons but the main one is: 

You can only owe someone something if you agreed to give it to them in exchange for something else in the first place. This logic applies to almost everything else in life yet women are made to feel as if we owe men sex just for breathing 🙃 

Imagine meeting someone who’s wearing a nice watch, telling them that their watch is nice, and expecting them to let you borrow it???

Her story brought it back to my attention that this message is not reaching enough women. It is YOUR PUSSY, YOU make the RULES. YOU decide who gets to see it, eat it, fuck it, touch it. NOTHING happens without your consent and your say so. Men know and understand this. Trust me, they do. BUT they know that some women don’t and they take advantage of that.

 I don’t care if he bought you a fucking Benz bitch if YOU DONT WANT to fuck him, don’t. Please. Unless of course it was agreed upon before hand (Even then, if you REALLY don’t want to, just give it back. Its not worth it) or you just simply WANT to. 

Stop “Guilt” fucking these men because they do not deserve your sympathy, guilt, or whatever it is that is making you feel like you should sleep with him even though you don’t want to. They do not feel any sort of remorse once they get what they want and dip. You will be the one feeling cheated in the end. He got a good meal and a good fuck. He wins. 

 By continuing to do so you are not only hurting yourself but the other women that he takes out with his spare change and has sex with. At the very least hold out for the big bucks. That whack ass dinner is only going to keep you full for a minute. If you don’t sleep with him and he doesn’t ask you on a second date, Its okay. There are too many men out there willing to wine and dine your fine ass. 

If you’re considering SW think long term. If you’re going to be giving that part of yourself in exchange for something, make sure whatever it is will be valuable to YOU and will help you move foward with your goals. 

STB 💅🏾

homeless and fabulous #sugar UPDATED

i go through the sugar tag weekly and i see an alarming amount of posts from girls who are homeless and having a hard time finding and a sugar daddy,so they resort to escorting for anything they can get,i do message them with advice when i can or get to know them and help.so heres some advice.

IF YOU DONT HAVE A CAR,YOU NEED ONE..

get into school and sign up for very easy classes (i.e. english,voice) to receive financial aid,tell them your parents arent around and figure out how to get the biggest bang for your buck.there are grant and refunds given by the thousands,

 refer to my hustle/fast money jobs in my links

if you already have a car-

GET A GYM MEMBERSHIP

you can shower there get ready for your day and it looks like anyone else who is there doing the same,and youll work out and look good

GET A P.O. BOX

you will need things mailed to you,i e. last paychecks,statements,whatever,some are $20 every 6 months

GET A SUITCASE/BAGS AND ORGANIZE YOUR CAR

if you look needy people will take advantage of you.so keep your favorite clothes/heels in luggage or bags and all your toiletries in the trunk.have your back seat pretty much empty.front also

GET A BANK ACCOUNT OR AN AMERICAN EXPRESS GO CARD-

this is obvious.something that is free to fill up and its not hard for someone to deposit money into.

GET TEMPORARY FOOD STAMPS-

i know your like public assistance?come on.there are a lot of people abusing food stamps and you dont have to be one of them.they will issue you emergency stamps meaning you have to make it to the office to pick it up that day.they’re there for a reason,students can easily get them if they are enrolled not sure how much they need.also if you dont have a real job they will ask you to fill out a form saying how you make your money,lie and say mowing the lawn or babysitting and it all pays in cash.

IF YOUR GETTING EVICTED-

there are many public assistance places that will help you pay a part of the rent,the only catch is you typically have to have your part first.you can find these places by calling 211 typically im not sure in other states,but food banks always have this info.

**if you don’t really have friends,be friendly with people you meet with caution. you may meet someone nice wholl let you crash for a couple days every week and dont let them know you are homeless.meet a few people like that and dont out welcome your stay.im not saying it will be easy like the movie show girls but it happens to me all the time.

Four Things You Should NEVER Do on a POT or Sugar Daddy DATE.

Have you ever been on a POT/SD date where it just felt so awkward and uncomfortable that you ended up leaving early? Or maybe you thought it went well but never got a call back from the guy you met with? There are reasons for this, mistakes which will ruin your chances of hitting it off with a sugar daddy you want.

Here are four things you should NEVER do on the first date:

So let’s run over 4 big DON'Ts that you must avoid if you want a first date to go well.   

Don’t - Unload your emotional baggage

When we talk about not bringing baggage to a date let’s first clear something up. First of all, you never want to view something like your children as baggage.

What I really mean by baggage is the “emotional” kind, like complaining to your date about how much you need to pay your bills, or how hard you’ve found it to trust men since your last guy cheated on you. 

This kind of stuff spells neediness and desperation to a guy and is immediately going to make him freak out that you have all your hopes staked on him, which is way too much pressure for a first date.

Don’t - Start texting in the middle of the date

Getting distracted from your date and pulling out your phone to read and send text messages is one of the sure-fire ways to bore a man and even more, come across as rude and disinterested. He might smile politely and not say a word, but inside you can bet that inside he’s turned off of you in that moment. 

If it’s urgent, then at least make the effort beforehand to apologise with: “I’m really sorry about this.” If you don’t even do that, he’s going to immediately get the sense that you’re not really bothered about his company.

Don’t - Agree with everything he says

Some women think that building attraction with a sugar daddy is all about finding common ground and avoiding disagreements. Although you don’t want to disagree for the sake of it, if he mentions that he loves Harry Potter and you can’t stand it then tell him that!

It’s counter-intuitive, but when you break rapport by disagreeing with him it will actually builds attraction for you, because he’ll see you as a challenging woman who won’t just agree with whatever he thinks.

Don’t - Get deep into the biggies -  Religion, Politics and Marriage

It can very quickly kill attraction if you turn your date into a debate.

Obviously if religion or politics is a big part of your life you can happily say: “I go to church on a Sunday” if you’re talking about what you do with your time, but be very careful of prying into someone else’s views on these issues on a first date.

People’s views on these things tend to be very passionate and a discussion on this can easily lead to you both seeing each other as an opponent, instead of just enjoying the first date as a chance to connect and have fun.

So bottom line: Maybe steer clear of asking someone whether they believe in God on the first date, or how they vote politically. 

(If religious views happen to be an absolute deal-breaker for you, it might be worth knowing where he stands on this before you date in the first place)

Although these mistakes should never be made when out on that date, you need to try and make it the best you possibly can.