11:50pm, 1 March 2013 at FiFi’s Sex Brasserie, Paris:
I’ve been enjoying another fantastic night out on the town, on my impromptu Paris holiday. Unfortunately, old thoughts haunt me at this moment, even as I receive a sensual lapdance from Claudette, a friend of my lovely wife (who I also consider a daughter). It is the slander that has been leveled against me by my online detracter. I just can’t figure out how to stop it. It reminds me of my own, immortal lyrics from decades ago: “I tried but I could not find a way." Even as I think of it, I have the same inflection and tone as I did when I first sung those lyrics. Little could I have known at the time that those same words would haunt my thoughts as a reminder of the nightmare I’m now living. The only way I can imagine the slander once and for all being put to rest is via the combined efforts of my brilliant friend Mike and you, the fans. Mike has come up with an ingenious slogan to help in this regard - STS: Stop The Slander. I know through my years of observing various charities that these sort of slogans are most effective. In this case it benefits myself, but although I am currently doing quite well and still receiving a lap dance, the situation is very grave indeed. I fear I may not be able to cum until we all band together and STS. Claudette is getting tired, and the hour is late. I hope I can count on your help.
Bryan Ferry (real)