strongest-person-i-knew

Nonno, you being taken away wasn’t fair. But I know now you are at peace and I’m sure you will be looking down on all of us with a cigarette in one hand and a glass of wine in the other, cringing when our hair isn’t tied up at the dinner table.
You were the strongest person I knew. You fought for so long, even though you were in pain. I know you fought for us.

It still doesn’t feel real. I don’t know how long this process will take but I do know that I’m going to try to be strong for you. I’m going to keep going because I know that’s what you would want.

I love you so much Nonno. Nothing will ever change that.

I love you, mom

Losing my best friend has been the hardest thing that I’ve gone through. She was the strongest person that I knew and there will never be another like her. She fought cancer for 9 years and raised three kids while being a widow. She was amazing and I was beyond blessed to have her as my mom. I’m so thankful for all that she did for my siblings and I. She was my favorite person on this world and I don’t think I will ever get used to her not being here. She doubled as my mom and my best friend. What more could I ask for? Everything I do, hear, or say just reminds me of her. I know that life without her will be hard, but knowing that she is no longer suffering and is resting in peace helps mend the pain a little. I don’t think I’ll ever get over losing her, but I now that she’s guiding and watching over my siblings and I. She is my guardian angel. I will forever love her and keep her memory alive. I love you, momma! I’ll see ya later. ❤️

My mom couldn’t make it through the MRI.  One of the symptoms of whatever it is she has is huge anxiety, depression, and all kinds of “invisible symptoms.”  She used to be the strongest, most sure person that I knew.  She has gained tons of weight, has trouble going up and down stairs, has become forgetful, has nightmares, mood swings, joint pain, she gets overwhelmed with things that used to be simple.  She used to be as thin as I am, super smart, great at remembering everything, energetic, athletic, helpful.  She used to surf when she lived in Florida, and when I started learning how to sail, she was right there learning too.  She had a photographic memory for numbers, if you needed something done, you just had to mention it, now you have to write it down.  I just want her to get better.  Maybe not as perfect as she was, that was a little annoying, but better than she is now.  She is always upset because she as very high expectations for herself and when she can’t meet them she gets very angry and sad.  For example, when she was decorating for Christmas, which she has always done, she would sit in the middle of a pile of decorations with her face in her hands because she was overwhelmed and couldn’t remember where everything was supposed to go and had to rely on last years pictures to remember.