a/n: hello this is nashi speaking and i am extremely shook by everything thats happened in the past few days omg ive never been this hyped to type
pairing: taehyung x reader
genre: fluff + angst
summary: you watched and watched as taehyung suffered from his one-sided love, comforting him when he cried, comforting him as he threw up those fucking flower petals. it hurt you whenever he would stare lovingly into that girl’s eyes, giggling and playing with her hair. it pained you when he kept throwing up flowers, pushing the thought that his lover didn’t love him away; he was so dejected, yet he never saw how much happiness he brought to you.
Oh fuck, oh fuck. Oh fuck. You watched in horror as flowers continued to fall down from your mouth, your continuous coughs seeming to last an eternity. ‘Stop coughing already’ you told yourself countless times - which was useless, your body hated your mind. Every time you tried to muffle your cough and fail, your eyes followed the stairs going upstairs, praying Taehyung couldn’t hear you in his sleep. Sure, he was a deep sleeper - but your coughs were damn loud in your ears. Was this how Taehyung felt when he first got the disease? The suffocating feeling that took place in your throat felt uncomfortable and scary - like you were going to choke. You raised your head towards the ceiling, closing your eyes. A wave of relief washed over you when the flowers no longer came out, wiping the tears away. “I need to clean this up..” You murmured, standing up shakily and walking towards the kitchen to grab a bag.
When picking up the flowers to dump in the bag, it was surprisingly dry. You’d expect it to be wet, but no - the world really was weird, you thought. After piling them all up into the bag, you threw them in the trash can and wrapped your arms around your waist. “I should see a doctor..” You bit down on your lip. You couldn’t tell Taehyung about this. Snatching your keys and slipping shoes on, you rushed out the house and into your car. Turning the engine on, you gripped the steering wheel tightly to the point where your knuckles became white. “Alright.” You took a deep breathe in, pushing down on the pedal.
The hospital was quite big - well, I mean, of course. How else would they keep patients? You walked in the building quietly, turning around a corner and into a small room. “Seokjin?” You asked quietly, knocking on the door. The well-framed man turned around, his round glasses sliding down his nose.
“(y/n)! What are you doing here?” Jin smiled, pushing up his glasses and gesturing for you to come in.
“Sorry for the sudden meeting,” you smiled back at him. “I was in a rush.”
“It’s fine.” He tapped his pen on his clipboard, settling himself down on his stool. “What’s up?”
Rolling your eyes, you sat on the bench in front of him and sighed. “You know how Tae has that..disease, right?”
Jin raised an eyebrow, his smile dissolving. “Yeah, why?”
You fiddled with your fingers, looking down. “I think I have it, too, Jin.”
He leaned back in his chair. “You understand that you just can’t..bam, get the disease right? It develops over time.” You shrugged, taking your time to think about it. Had your feelings for Taehyung been developing over the years the two of you had been friends?
“I-I swear, I have it, Jin,” you whispered, looking up at him. “The flowers came out today.”
Jin bit down on his lip, clicking the end of the pen a few times before glancing at you. “When did it happen?” He asked, positioning his pen onto the paper on his clipboard.
“Um..at around 1, I think.” You answered softly, butterflies swarming around in your stomach. Scribbling down on the paper, he looked up again.
“Who is the person you’re being involved with?”
His jaw dropped, eyes widened, breathe sucked in. “Are you sure? (y/n), you know he has a girlfriend! Why are you-”
“I wouldn’t call her his girlfriend when she cheats on him everyday!” You retorted sharply, curling your fingers around the edge of the bench. Adjusting his glasses, Jin let out a short sigh.
“That may be true, but..you got yourself involved in something weird.” He murmured, writing something down on his paper again. “Anyways,” he continued, “Do you want to have the surgery?”
“Surgery? What surgery?” Your eyes widened at the thought of surgery - the whole concept scared you. The fact that someone would be opening up your body and going through your organs and shit made you cringe. Jin stared at you with confusion.
“Have I never told you about the surgery?” You shook your head. “Alright, well..basically, in the surgery, it cures the Hanahaki Disease, but you loose the ability to love anyone.” His eyes gazed into yours, expression laced with concern and worry. “That would probably be the best, you know.”
You felt your stomach drop down, shaking your head again. “No.”
“No? Don’t you know that you’ll be suffering from this disease if you don’t get the surgery?”
“Jin!” You stood up, shoving your hands in your pocket. “It’s not that simple! You can’t just convince me to stop..having the feeling to have affection!” Pinching the bridge of your nose, you let out a groan of frustration. “Never mind. I have to go.” You grumbled, approaching the door to leave the room.
“You’re gonna be in a lot of pain. Mentally and physically, (y/n).” Jin called out, jogging after you and into the lobby. “Wait a sec!” You turned around, taking a step back.
“Are you going to bring Taehyung here?”
“Why would I have to do that?”
Jin flicked your forehead. “Because he also had the disease, you idiot.” He groaned, rubbing his temple. “He’s been dealing with it for months now. He’s probably going to die if he doesn’t have surgery, (y/n).” His voice softened at your gloomy expression, adjusting the cuffs of his sleeves.
“Look, I’m sure people in the past have died,” you murmured, turning on your heel to walk away. “But I’m sure Taehyung will survive this.” And with that, you exited the building and let out a loud groan. Checking your phone for a quick second, you shuffled over to the bakery across the street and peeked your head inside.
You slammed the car door while entering the vehicle, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear. Letting out a small cough, a tiny flower escaped out and into your hand. You shook it away, roughly running your hand through your hair. “What the fuck am I supposed to do now?” You yelled, slamming your head on the steering wheel. The choices weren’t good at all - if you do let Taehyung get the surgery, he would be free of his pain; but he couldn’t return your feelings. Sure, it was selfish of you, but you couldn’t help it. The next option was for you to have the surgery instead, or both of you could have it. The main problem was that it would make things complicated and awkward between the two of you. If you had to take the surgery, Taehyung would find out you had the disease and pressure you into telling him who you loved.
“Why me, out of all the people?” You quickly inserted your key in the engine, waiting for the car to warm up and driving yourself back home.
“Tae?” You called out as you entered the house, eyes locating a small note on the counter.
‘Going out with Suha~~~~ I made ramen for you, enjoy okay bye save some for me BYE’
You glanced at the small pot on top of the stove and crumpled up the note, walking towards it and opening it. “Wow, how fancy.” Inside the pot was instant ramen, which everyone could damn see. Taehyung wasn’t very effective in cooking even after Jin gave him lessons; well, stressful lessons. You grabbed a bowl and chopsticks, pouring the noodles out and glancing at the clock. Six PM. You made your way to the kitchen table, setting your bowl down and grabbing your phone out. Halfway through taking a bite, you felt another cough come up.
“Shit.” You murmured, covering your mouth to stifle the noise. You just couldn’t get used to the feeling of flowers coming out your body, it was weird. As the flowers continued to scatter, a thought skipped around in your mind -
Would it be better to leave Taehyung?
You let out a rough cough, standing up from the chair and wiping your nose. Glancing at the clock, your eyes watched the hands tick and tick from minute to minute. Taehyung would be coming home at around ten o’clock - he always did and even made a curfew for himself. The thought made you smile as your walked upstairs, discarding the noodles and walking into your bedroom. The faint smell of perfume still floated around some places, but thankfully had weakened as time passed. It felt strangely empty in the house without Taehyung bugging you for snacks every five minutes, the only sound you could hear clearly was the faint sound of beeping outside.
Your fingers tapped on the small icon on your phone, bringing it to your ear.
“HELLO!!” The scream erupted from the other line, causing you to jump away from the phone.
“Hoseok, I told you not to-”
“WHAT IS UP, MY FRIENDLY FRIEND.”
You laughed and sat on your bed, checking yourself in the mirror. “Taehyung’s out, so I wanted to call you.”
“Ooo! Out where?”
“Out with Suha,” you grumbled lowly, letting out a sigh and flopping down on the mattress.
“Suha? That’s his girlfriend, right?”
“Why does everybody think she’s his girlfriend? Am I going crazy?” You kicked your feet up in the air, letting out a screech of frustration. “She is not his boyfriend!”
“Sounds like someone’s jealous~” Hoseok cooed, giggling loudly.
“I am not!”
“I have to go, (y/n)! Your angel has to go to work, ba-byeeeee!” He laughed, hanging up the call.
“Wa-” You shut your phone off, throwing it on the other side of your bed. “I forgot everyone has jobs..” You coughed, discarding the flowers onto the floor. You had no energy anymore to do anything to prevent it and drifted into sleep, eyes fluttering shut.
Taehyung came back late at night while you were sleeping. His loud knocks jolted you out of sleep. “You’re annoying!” You screamed, stomping out your room and down the stairs, opening the door swiftly. “Why are you knocking on my door at two AM?!” He stared at you blankly, letting out a small sigh and stumbling in.
“Answe- ohmygodhaveyoubeendrinking.” A strong scent of alcohol slapped you straight across the face, making you stumble back.
“Yeah,” he let out a deep breath, taking off his jacket.
“Couldn’t you just go back to your own house?!” You whined unhappily, covering your nose with your hand. “I don’t like being woken up.”
Taehyung shot a small smile at you in apology, ruffling up his hair. “Sorry, you were the closest house I could go to.”
“Whatever, don’t come in my room, I don’t wanna die.”
He stared at you again, raising his eyebrows. “But I always do when..you know..”
Uncovering your nose, you sighed. “..Get a cup of water ready.”
“Actually!” He piped up, his smiling growing wider. “Can we talk about somethin’?”
“Hm? About what?” You asked, stopping halfway between walking to the kitchen. Taehyung jumped up and down like a child, his eyes sparkling with excitement.
“Suha and I are gonna get engaged~~”
You could literally hear your heart shatter into pieces. Your smile disappeared along with the energy you had left in you after you woke up. Inside your mind, you were astonished; did he just really think Suha was working with her co-workers? You had to tell him - or he’d have to live with Suha and suffer even more.
“H-Hey..that’s a bit too fast, don’t you think?” You clenched your sweaty palms into a fist, forcing a small smile. “You’ve only been dating for what, three months now, Tae. You’re twenty two years old, you still have a lot to live up to!” Your voice went wobbly as you took a step towards him, looking hopeless. “A-And! I just..it..” Your words trailed off while staring at him, feeling an comfortable feeling spreading to you. Taehyung stared at you with furrowed eyebrows, chewing on his lip.
“She already checked in with her father, I dunno why you’re so worked u-”
“How many other boys is she getting married to?”
His eyes widened at the sudden statement, raising an eyebrow. “What? Other boys? Are you acting like this because you’re tired?”
“No!” You responded quickly and loudly, your hair falling in front of your wide eyes. “Taehyung, listen. Suha’s cheating on you, she’s been doing it this entire time. You..you’re..too naive and you fell for her tricks so easily,” the tap let out a small drop of water as you spoke. “F-For two months, Taehyung, and you never noticed.”
The two of you stared at each other silently. The room was so quiet you thought you could hear your heart thumping against your chest.
“Go to bed, (y/n).” He spoke quietly, looking down at the ground.
“I think I’ll sleep at my house tonight,” His voice whispered softly, gathering his jacket.
“You believe me, right..?” You squeaked quietly, the forced smile dropping. He paused, shrugging his shoulders.
“Taehyung, I swear on my life, don’t do it! Don’t you know you’ll die if you continue this!?”
“I don’t care!” Taehyung spat, rebelling against your words. “God, (y/n). Are you angry that I won’t be over at your house anymore? That I’m growing up?” He glared at you angrily, shoving his jacket on.
You gulped, grabbing his wrist. “Please,” you pleaded desperately, heart pounding and mouth going dry. “I don’t want you getting hurt.”
“Hurt? Suha isn’t going to hurt me.”
“It’ll hurt me!” You screamed at him, your eyes watering up. Don’t go, don’t go, don’t fucking go. You’d go into a dark hole, a hole which you had been scared of your whole entire life. A hole which where Taehyung disappeared from your site, only coming to you when he needed a drink or had a fight with Suha. You’re world was bright with him by your side; and he was leaving without another trace.
You coughed into your arm, your hand which gripped tightly on Taehyung’s arm trembling. “Oh god, not now..”
He ripped your hand off his wrist, staring at you with slight concern. “I know it’s hard,” he spoke loudly to overcome your coughs. Your hand hid the small flowers, turning around and trembling with fear and pain altogether. “But it’s not like I’ll leave forever.” He opened the door, slamming it closed. Your knees have in, crashing to the ground as the flowers came pouring out. They created a large pile on the wooden floor, more intense than last time. Your heart was broken, and he had left. Left without you, without your thoughts, but had brought your smile with him. Why was he going so fast with her? He should’ve had a few months left before making such a vast decision. Tears poured down your face, loud sobs escaping your shaky lips. “Don’t go..” You whispered, clawing at the ground. “Don’t do it..”
With a shaky hand you reached out for your phone in your pocket, dialing a number quickly. “Hello?”
Barely whispering, you let out a strangled cough. “T-Tae..h-hyung..leave- leaving m-mee..”
“What? Are you crying?”
The words came out butchered and unclear, trying your best to overcome the tears flowing down. “H-He went aw..ay so f-a-s.t,” you choked up, clenching a small flower inside your hand. “He wouldn’t even l-listen to me!”
A sigh floated into your ear from the other end of the phone as your sobbed into your hand. “Hey, calm down. I’m coming to get you.”
“N-No..don’t do th-aa.tt..”
“Are you stupid? I am, hang up this call, and don’t move.”
You were left with a quiet beep. Two minutes went by before someone slammed the door open, banging against the wall. “H-hey!” Crawling away from the sudden burst, you stared at the man in front of you, who was panting and wiping the sweat off his face.
“I tol- what the fuck is that,” he stared at the flowers, switching his gaze between the pile and you.
“I dropped a flower vase!” You hiccuped, rushing over to the pile and laughing nervously. You cupped them in your shaky hands, staring down at them with teary eyes. “Fuck, Yoongi..Suha is gonna take Taehyung away from me.”
“What?” Yoongi sat down on a stool near by the kitchen counter, running a hand through his hair half-way. “Aren’t they-”
“No, they are not girlfriend and boyfriend!”
“What the hell is wrong with you? Why are you so jealous?”
“What’s wrong with being jealous when the boy I love is with another woman who doesn’t give two fucking shits about him!” You screamed back at him, clutching the flowers in your right palm. “Girlfriend this, girlfriend that, shut the fuck up!”
Yoongi stood up from the chair, walking towards you and grabbing your collar in his fist. “You better calm your ass down and explain what this is all about.” His icy voice shook you through your body. His glare, not to mention his scolding, would be able to shut anyone down. His hand released the material, standing back and allowing you to cool down. “Explain.”
You let out a shaky breath, dropping the flowers. “Hanahaki disease.”
“What?” He cocked his eyebrows, folding his arms. “Isn’t that what Taehyung has?” You nodded.
“So,” he stared at the flower falling down from your hand. “You love Taehyung.”
“And why is he leaving?”
Your knees knocked against each other. “They’re getting married.”
Yoongi’s jaw dropped open, a small gasped escaping his lips. “Oh shit, really?”
“Yes!” You whined, shoving your hands inside your hair, nails digging into your scalp. “He doesn’t even realize she’s being such a slut!”
“Hey, calm down, don’t go that far.” Yoongi scolded, shooting an icy glare at you. After a few frustrated grumbles and stomps, you calmed down. “It’s weird.” He leaned his body against the couch, looking down at the ground with his legs crossed over each other. “You never act like this. Taehyung must be really special to you.”
“I hate this. I didn’t want to like him that way. The effects of the disease is gonna get worse, too.”
“Wait..what happens if it gets worse?” You shrugged, turning your chin.
“Death or somethin’.” Yoongi shot up, eyes wild.
“Are you fucking insane? Death? Can’t-”
“I will not get a surgery,” you snapped at him, taking a step closer and turning yourself to face him. “As much as I hate having this situation, I just can’t let Taehyung leave my love life this way.”
“Love life, who cares! Your life is fragile, don’t take it for granted!” Yoongi pressed, his hands shooting up in the air. You stood there quietly, avoiding his blazing gaze. Finally, he groaned. “Get in my car, we’re going to the club.”
“Hey! Yoongi!” You clung to his arm, eyes widening at the blasting music in the large building. Everyone swayed their hips, giggling and screaming as the lights blinded you. “Oh fuck-”
“You seriously have never been clubbing before? You really are sad.”
“I just wanted to sleep, it’s five AM!” You protested as you were dragged inside against your will.
“Yoongi! I missed you!”
Your head turned towards the source of the silky voice, eyes laying upon a short man with -
“Oh my god,” you whispered. “Is that an angel? Did I get run over? Did I-”
“That’s Jimin. I haven’t introduced you to him yet.” Yoongi rolled his eyes, waving at Jimin. “Hey! Come over here, meet (y/n)!”
The man rushed over, extending his hand towards you. “Yoongi has a friend, finally!” He yelped with pain as Yoongi punched him in the shoulder, cursing him out. “Hey, chill, man~”
“I swear to g-”
“I’m Jimin! You can call me Jimine, Chim Chim, whatever you want!” Jimin smiled while you shook his hand, giving him an awkward smile in return. “Okay! Yoongi! What drinks will we have today? I’m gonna beat you this time.”
Yoongi scoffed, taking your hand off his arm and whacking Jimin up his head. “You wish. We’re doing whiskey today.”
“Hey! You know I wi-”
“Exactly why I chose it, you midget.”
Jimin let out a screech of anger, waving goodbye to you and dragging him to the back of the room. You stood there, trying to avoid everyone bumping into you. “..You forgot me?” You sighed, settling down on the counter stool.
“Want a drink?” You looked up, locking eyes with a pair of dark, brown eyes.
“Uh..no. I don’t drink.”
The young male chuckled, wiping the glass with his towel. “Why are you here, then? This place was made for you to get drunk.”
“I was dragged here against my own will, buddy.” You smirked, leaning your chin against your hand. You studied his facial features, as well as the upper half of his body - he wore a loose tuxedo, which was quite bizarre, paired with a strong frame. His face was lightly tanned, eyes soaked with a deep brown color. His hair was also brown, which was literally shining in your face.
“Who brought you here?” He asked, sliding over a glass of water over to you. You took a sip of the water, eyeing him.
“Yoongi, my friend.”
He stared at you, confused. “Yoongi? Like, the Yoongi that can drink almost twenty drinks and still be okay?”
You groaned, setting the cup of water down. “Yep.”
“You..you don’t look like he’d-”
“I know.” You laughed. “My name is (y/n). Let’s get to know each other, shall we?” You introduced yourself smoothly, extending your hand out to him.
“I’m Jungkook, international playboy.” Jungkook grinned, taking your hand and shaking it roughly.
“International playboy?” You laughed along with him, watching the corners of his eyes crinkle as his smile widened.
“Yep!” He chuckled, setting the cup he previously cleaned earlier down. “So, you were dragged here?”
“Your eyes are red. Have you been cryin’ or something?”
Your hands shot up to your eyes, leaning back a bit. “Is it that obvious?” Your ears heated up when he nodded, slamming your hand back down on the counter. “I went through something earlier, doesn’t matter.”
“I’m sure it matters, (y/n).”
Your head snapped around, almost choking on your own spit. Taehyung stood there, staring at you with confusion. “W-Wha-”
“Who’s this?” Jungkook asked, obviously alerted by your discomfort by the sudden crash in. The music blared in your ears, staring at Taehyung with wide eyes.
“Y-Yoongi dragged me here, I swear.”
“Oh,” was all Taehyung said, sneaking a glance at Jungkook.
You turned around, almost stumbling off the stool while Jimin laughed and wrapped his arms around you. “What’s good!”
“Jimin, not now,” you whispered through your teeth, flinching when Yoongi joined the oh so wonderful club.
“Jimin, get your ass back here and finish it like a man!” Yoongi stopped, noticing the problem. “Oh. Taehyung, what are you doing here?”
“I just wanted a drink.” Taehyung responded softly, glaring at Jimin’s drunk actions. “When did you become friends with Jimin?”
You shivered, feeling as if he was pinning your down on the spotlight. His attitude completely changed - his aura felt weird and his gaze wanted to make you shrivel up and die. “A few minutes ago, Tae.”
Just when things couldn’t get any worse and confusing, Suha skipped over to Taehyung and crawled her fingers up his chin. “Hey, what’s taking you so long to get my drink?” Her eyes landed on you, her gaze sharpening.
“Sorry, Suha.” Taehyung smiled at her weakly, looking at Jungkook. “Whiskey.”
“Hey, don’t order me around, dude!” Jungkook barked, setting his towel down.
“Just do it, Jungkook.” You muttered, standing up. “Thanks for hanging out with me for a bit. I’ll see you whenever.” You shoved Jimin off of you, quickly walking out the club and outside. The air was cold, immediately hitting you and causing you to shriek.
“It’s cold, why don’t you have a jacket?” Taehyung’s voice called out from behind, you turning around to face him.
You lifted your left shoulder up and down, shivering so mch to the point where it started to make you sore. “’Cause.”
“(y/n), you’ve never went to a club before.” He sighed, shutting the doors to the club closed. “Why are you suddenly shy and..doing all this?”
“I don’t know.”
“How do you not know if what you’re doing are your own actions?”
“Speak for yourself, Taehyung!” You spat, stomping your foot in front of you. “All of sudden, you’re engaged with a fucking slut!”
Taehyung gritted his teeth together, walking towards you. “Don’t say that.”
“It’s true,” you laughed, walking backwards. “She’s been cheating on you, yet you never noticed. Was she there for you when you were on the verge of tears? Was she there for you when you were about to break down?! No! She was always in the background, her lips somewhere on someone else’s mouth!” Your words screamed into his ears, your lips turning slightly numb, as well are your fingers.
“Shut up! She’s not doing any of those things! Can’t you see, (y/n)?!” Taehyung argued, his voice reaching up to level up with yours. “I love her! Why are you being so fucking jealous?!”
“It’s not being jealous, it’s concern!” You stopped walking backwards, allowing him to get closer. “You don’t see it, Tae!”
“Don’t call me Tae.”
“I don’t care!” You sobbed, letting the tears fall out your eyes. The tears that had been holding back ever since Taehyung walked into your life were finally spilling and splattering onto the ground. “Why can’t you just trust me, Taehyung?! Are all our years of friendship just going to go down the drain?” Tears streamed down your face as you yelled at him, voice breaking at how loud you were. Footsteps ran closer to you.
You raised your hand up in reflex, shutting your eyes closed.
You opened your eyes, shaking with fear. Yoongi held Taehyung back, who was looked angry, as well as pained.
Jimin grabbed your arm, dragging you away. “Hey..why are you guys arguing?” He had calmed down and didn’t act as drunk, his eyes clouded with tears.
“He doesn’t trust me. He doesn’t..trust me.” You cried softly, you yourself calming down as well. You fell to your knees, sobbing in your hands.
You had broken off your relationship with Taehyung ever since that day.
Deleted his phone number, stayed in your locked house. You stared at yourself in your mirror.
The Flash 3x22 “Infantino Street” Sneak Peek - With only 24 hours left until Savitar murders Iris, Barry struggles to save the woman he loves and makes the choice to use any means necessary to do so. Realizing he has one option left to save her, the Flash turns to Captain Cold for help.
You fled the apartment through your bedroom window with a duffle bag of clothes and spare cash thrown over your shoulder. And it was of course not hard to catch a taxi this time around.
“Just two streets down, please,” you say. The cabbie grunts out a confirmation and the car begins to roll down the street. You peek through the window pane and see a lockbox near his seat. No, bad [Y/n], you tell yourself. You lean back in your seat and slowly open up your bag. You counted 800 dollars from your mom’s secret stash under the floorboards (”How does she think I don’t know about this?!”). There was a rough patch at her work and she had to start saving up just in case.
After the company followed through on their end of a comfort deal, your mom decided it would be a good idea to continue to save up just in case. Now that you know what’s going on with your dad, you figured maybe hewas the reason why all along.
As lucky as you are to have it, 800 dollars would get you a plane ticket to Georgia at the least.
So yeah, you felt guilty looking at the lockbox in a mixture of greed and fear.
Theft wouldn’t get you anywhere. Well, anywhere good…
You’d been so caught up in thought that you didn’t notice the cab had rolled to Peter’s apartment building. “Hey, lady,” the cabbie said. You looked up at him and shook your head. “I’m so sorry,” you exclaimed as you slid him the bills through the plastic window. “Thanks,” you squeaked out.
It was a week before you saw anything from the Arrow again, and it wasn’t him. Instead, when you pushed your door open with your foot, laden with several tupperware full of freshly baked goods courtesy of Jacob and Antony across the hall, it took you a heart pounding second to recognize Ragman.
You closed the door quickly and pressed your back flush against it. You cursed. “You’re all going to give me a heart attack.” You said, not moving from the door.
From his spot by your couch you saw him shift. “I’m sorry.” He said. The echoey tone of his distorted voice was still jarring. “I was told this would be a good place to hide.”
Okay, so I got inspired earlier – I wanted to write a little bit about one of my headcanons involving Jack. So of course I made it garbage. It’s really bad and long, and I’m not sure how long I’ll leave it posted – But here you go.
Crutchie gets stuck in a storm and seeks shelter in a small bookshop and discovers a secret about a certain charismatic union leader.
I left work and walked down the street, peeked down the
alley as I had ever since that man was shot. I kept my eye on the obituaries to
see if a picture of the man or the name Dean was mentioned, but nothing. Maybe
he survived? Passed out from shock? I continued down the illuminated street
when I looked at the bar on the corner. A man in a red button up and black
t-shirt stood under the street lamp, leaning against the post. I did a double
take, not believing my eyes.
“I love you, but I don’t know how to say it properly.”
“I love you more than life itself.”
“I don’t think you know what you mean to me.”
It was hard to watch. Watching your best friend since he became a prospect being with those damn croweaters every night. You knew you had no say in it but still it was hard as hell. He had no claim on you and you had no claim on him.
But it wasn’t as if you didn’t want it.
You loved him. You loved him deeply, but just didn’t know how to say it properly. You sighed as you sat on your couch late at night with the TV being the only noise through your small apartment.
You sat there while the party at SAMCRO was going on and though Juice had indeed invited you, you just didn’t feel like showing up only to watch him grinding up against some disgusting croweater.
You kept your eyes on the TV series you were currently watching. So much so that you didn’t hear someone pull up outside and coming up your steps outside until the pounding on your door had you jump from your skin.
You looked away from the TV startled and wondered who the hell was at your door at eleven at night. Grabbing the hunting knife that you had sitting next to you on your end table you held it by your side as you peered through the peep hole of your door before letting your body ease and you opened the door.
There standing on your doorstep with his hood up was Juice. He looked at you with that confused expression that he wore when he didn’t understand what was happening or when he was trying to hide something, but you normally seen right through that one.
“What are you doing here? Thought SAMCRO was having a party?”
“I came to ask you the same question.”
He replied. You rolled your eyes and walked away leaving the door open for him to come inside if he wanted – he followed after you, shutting the front door. He watched as you put the knife back down on the table and plopped back down onto the couch and continued watching your show in the dark.
Juice just looked at you. His brows were raised and almost didn’t seem like he knew what he was suppose to do right now.
“You going to answer my question?”
He asked. You refused to give him eye contact as you kept watching the TV.
“You going to answer my question first?”
You scoffed. He shook his head. What had gotten into you that made you so cold toward him all of a sudden? What had he done that caused this type of emotions toward him.
“What’s the matter with you? Why are you acting like this?”
“Like a – Like a bitch?”
You head snapped around toward him and sent him a glare. He knew damn good and well that those words didn’t fly with you. You both had been friends long enough that he knew better.
“Oh I’m sorry that I’m not allowed to be myself when I want and I have to put a filter on my emotions for you, Juice.”
You said picking up the remote and changing the channel.
“Why don’t you go back to the club and find a crow to stick your dick inside.”
He scoffed and shook his head.
“Are you jealous?”
He asked, which did not earn him a reply and instead just made you keep your eyes on the screen. You heard him move across the room and before you knew what was happening, Juice ripped the remote out of your hands and turned the TV off which left you both completely in the dark save for the street lights that peeked in through your blinds.
“Are you seriously jealous of the attention the crows get? Fuck, Y/N!”
Juice groaned as he tossed the remote across the room and it hit something unknown. He hated when you were like this which to be honest wasn’t very often, but when it happened he felt like shit for it happening.
You didn’t move as Juice stood there looking at the wall beside you. You bit your bottom lip and kept your eyes on your hands that were resting in your lap.
“You don’t know what you mean to me.”
You whispered, causing him to look down at you. You kept your eyes on your hands in your lap afraid to see how he was looking at you.
“I love you…”
You managed to choke. You had been afraid for months now to finally say it and when he didn’t reply you felt your heart drop in the bottom of your stomach so you continued on figuring that you’ve already ruined your friendship with him now.
“I love you more than life itself. Those croweaters, they could never love you like I do. They chase after the patch and not the man underneath it. Just like Wendy, they’d crumble under the weight and not know what to do in the end. But I – I know what it takes and I’d stay beside you every step of the way. I – I love you so much that it hurts.”
You said bringing your hands up to cover your face as you finally couldn’t help it anymore and you let all your emotions out in front of him. You heard a noise and then felt his hands on your wrists. He pulled free your hands from your face and you seen that he was down on his knees in front of you.
His eyes were wide and glistening from either the light or his emotions, you couldn’t really tell which one.
“Y/N… why didn’t you say something sooner? Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I didn’t want to ruin our friendship in case you didn’t feel the same.”
Juice just shook his head and placed his hands on your shoulders before they slid up to your face. He bit his bottom lip and pulled your face closer to his.
“You silly, silly girl.”
He whispered with a large grin before he kissed you softly.
Prompt: While spending the summer with your uncle Tony, you and Bucky become quite close.
Word count: 2181
A/n: I’m starting school tomorrow so I won’t be writing as much, sorry! And requests would be very much appreciated. Oh and P.S. thanks so much for over 70 followers!
“I still don’t understand why my mother made me come all the way to New York to spend the summer with you,” you joked as you sat in Tony’s lab, fiddling with some gadgets on his table while he tinkered away on one of his numerous suits.
“Because I’m your coolest uncle,” Tony argued.
“You’re my only uncle,” You pointed out.
“Yeah whatever, you’ll thank me one day,” He replied as sparks flew off his suit, followed by a string of curse words. Tony wasn’t really your uncle, your mother was sister to Pepper Potts, and Tony was basically her husband so you called him your uncle. Plus, you were really close, you had spent the last four summers with him, and you loved every second of it.
“Can I use this,” You asked, pointing to coils emitting blue tendrils of light.
“Do you want to die?” Tony responded. You pulled your hand away, picking up the mini arc reactor you had been playing with earlier. Just then, Bucky strode into the lab, his metal arm whirring and whining.
“Hey Tony, can you help me, I think something’s wrong with my arm,” Bucky observed, flopping it around wildly.
“No kidding,” Tony whispered as he pulled Bucky’s arm closer to him.
“Up,” Tony commanded as he motioned for Bucky to hop onto the table next to you. He hopped up, offering you a small smile.
“Hey [Y/n],” Bucky greeted as Tony scurried off to find the supplied necessary to fix him.
“Hiya Buck, how’s a-goin?” You asked.
“Oh not much, ya know, Steve just punched me so hard that he shorted out my arm, no big deal,” Bucky dismissed.
“Why did he punch you?” You asked.
“Oh uh we- ah- well I… It’s a long story,” Bucky stuttered as he looked down at his dangling legs, swinging them back and forth lightly.
*Flashback to thirty minutes ago*
“Hey Buck, what’s up,” Steve asked as Bucky leaned against the counter in the kitchen, running his fingers through his hair, and sighing loudly, obviously frustrated.
“Oh uh nothing,” Bucky dismissed, peeling away from the counter, trying to avoid Steve’s pointed gaze.
“C’mon Buck, I know something’s up, tell me,” Steve prodded.
“I don’t think you-
“Just tell me,” Steve poked.
“Fine… Ya know [Y/n]?” Bucky asked.
“Yeah… Tony’s niece. She’s like a sister to me, I’ve known her since she was little, why, what’s wrong with her is she ok?” Steve asked, worry evident in his taut voice. Steve was very protective of you, ever since he had met you, since you had no other siblings he took over the role as protective older brother. Steve took his job very seriously.
“No, nothing’s wrong,”
“Then what about her,”
“I was, well I was kind of maybe thinking of asking her out on a date, maybe? Cause I’ve liked her for a long time, and I kinda even think I might be in love with her, she’s just so beautiful and witty and intelligent-”
“No,” Steve decided, cutting off Bucky’s ramble.
“What why not, you know I would never hurt her, Steve,” Bucky argued.
“Wait, did you say you loved her? How long has this been going on?,” Steve asked.
“Uh, since last summer when she came to visit, and yeah, I think I love her,” Bucky admitted.
“And you never told me?”
“It didn’t seem important,” Bucky muttered, shrugging his shoulders. Steve looked at Bucky, his features frozen in thought.
“Fine, but if you hurt her in any way,” Steve warned.
“Don’t worry Stevie, there will only be one reason she would ever scream my name, if you know what I mean,” Bucky joked, wiggling his eyebrows. Steve clenched his jaw and slugged Bucky in the arm, sending him staggering backwards. His arm let off a horrible mechanical screech and then hung limp at Bucky’s side, the dead weight causing him to lean slightly
“Please don’t ever make a gross comment like that about [Y/n] again, or I will punch you harder,” Steve informed as he guided Bucky to Tony’s lab.
“Noted,” Bucky wheezed as the arrived at Tony’s lab.
You looked at Bucky on the table, Tony sautering away on his arm.
“Does that hurt?” you asked, leaning over him slightly to see what was happening on his left side.
“No, not really,” Bucky replied.
“So how did you short this out?” Tony asked.
“Steve punched me,” Bucky told Tony.
“Why?” Tony prodded.
“Not important,” Bucky diverted. You looked on as Tony worked, with Bucky distracted by his arm, you were free to stare all you wanted. You had to admit to yourself, Bucky was hot. You had thought this since you first arrived this summer, about three weeks ago. And since then, feelings for him had hit you like a truck. And you had mentioned it to Steve and Tony, but neither of them did not seem to keen on the idea, sometimes those men were too protective of you for your own good.
“[Y/n]?” Bucky voice rang out, breaking you from your daydream.
“Huh, what?” You stuttered.
“Uh, never mind,” He decided, glancing between you and Tony.
“Ok, as fun as this is, I’m gonna go watch a movie,” You announced, hopping from the table and heading out the door.
“Bye Tony, bye Buck,” You shouted as you strode down the hall toward the living room.
“Absolutely not,” Tony mused as he searched through the mess on the table for the tool he needed.
“What was that?” Bucky asked.
“I said there is no way you are gonna go out with her,” Tony clarified.
“But I never-
“You didn’t have to, your look said it all,” Tony noticed.
“Steve said the same thing,” Bucky whispered.
“That’s why he punched me,”
“I don’t blame him,” Tony agreed. Silence hung in the air, the only sound in the room the crackling of sparks and the rock music turned down really low on the speakers.
“Why not?” Bucky asked, his voice quiet.
“Because… because I said so, and i’m her uncle, so my word goes. What if you hurt her?” Tony brought up, looking at Bucky through his tinted goggles.
“What do you mean?” Bucky asked, hurt slicing through his tone.
“You’re still a little unstable, and we still don’t know how to make sure no one can turn you into the Winter Soldier. And that arm could seriously hurt someone, even if you don’t want to hurt her you still could, it’s done enough damage already. I just don’t think it’s a good idea,” Tony explained. Bucky’s rib cage collapsed, all the air leaked from his lungs, his heart exploded into a million pieces.
“But I’ve gotten so much better i-I’ve made so much progress, I’ve healed. I’m not him anymore, and I never will be again, I can take care of her, I’m better,” Bucky defended.
“Yeah well not better enough, you’re still dangerous,” Tony continued.
“Well if that’s what you think than, fine,” Bucky spat, hopping off the counter and rushing out the door, angry words falling from his lips.
“Barnes wait…” Tony called, but Bucky was already gone.
Bucky stormed through the living room, his pace quick and determined.
“Hey Bucky,” You chirped. You got no response, he ignored you and got into the elevator, angrily pressing the button.
“Ok…” You whispered, getting up off the couch. You made your way back to Tony’s lab, bursting through the door.
“What did you do to Bucky?” You demanded.
“Nothing, why?” Tony lied
“He seemed really mad when he left the tower, and he was just with you so I assume you probably said something offensive,” you observed.
“Me, offensive? Never,” Tony chuckled.
“No, me and Barnes were talking about making some upgrades to his arm and he got… angry,” Tony implied.
“We both know that’s bull,” you argued.
“Would you be a dear and go for a coffee run? I’m beat and could really go for a chai tea right now,” Tony announced, changing the subject. You looked at him, your features turned down in a scowl.
“Fine, but only because I want coffee too,” You decided. You noted what Tony wanted and headed from the lab and out into the hall. On your way out of the tower you ran into Steve.
“Hey Steve, I’m going on a coffee run, do you want anything?” you asked. Steve thought for a moment.
“Sure, can you get me an iced coffee?” Steve asked, shoving a five dollar bill in your hand.
“Oh I don-
“Just take it for my coffee,” Steve demanded, and before you could tell him you didn’t need it he walked down the hall.
You walked down the street, enjoying the sun peeking over the skyscrapers and the sounds of the city. You arrived at the coffee shop, getting in line, trying to remember what everyone wanted. Once you got up to the front, you placed your order and sat down to wait. After a few minutes, your name was called and you went up to retrieve your tray of drinks. As you balanced all three drinks, your phone, and your bag, the man standing directly behind you went unnoticed. You turned around and ran smack into him, spilling both hot and cold drinks over the two of you.
“Oh crap, sorry, oh let me help you… [Y/n]?” The man asked. You looked up from the mess on the floor to meet the piercing gaze of none other than Bucky. His steely blue eyes flitted over yours, emotions you couldn’t place swirling over his irises.
“Hey I was wondering where you had gone in such a rush,” You commented. Bucky kept wiping the floor, not meeting your gaze. Once the mess was cleaned up off the floor you both stood up.
“Oh your shirt,” Bucky whispered, dabbing your chest lightly. Your cheeks flared up in red, a shy smile playing on your lips.
“Bucky it’s fine, really,” You assured, shooing him away.
“Um actually, I have to go- uh bye,” Bucky stuttered, looking like he was suddenly remembering something. He turned on his heel and left, pushing the door open and emerging into the busy street of bustling bodies and loud noises.
“Wait Bucky,” You called, maneuvering through the crowded street to catch up to him. When you were finally in stride with him you spoke.
“Are you ok?” You asked, looking up at him.
“Uh yeah fine,” he replied, his gaze falling everywhere but on you.
“Really, cause it doesn’t seem like it,” You pointed out.
“Did my uncle say something to you?” You asked, bumping your shoulders together as you walked along.
“No,” Bucky defended.
“Buck, please tell me what’s wrong, please, I can help you. I want to help you,” You pleaded.
“You can’t help me,” Bucky spit.
“Why not,” “Because I’m dangerous, if you get to close, I will hurt you, everybody thinks so, and so do I,” Bucky muttered, his words harsh, but quiet.
“What? Is that what Tony told you?” You asked. Bucky nodded, his lip tucked under his bottom teeth.
“Steve thinks so too,” He added.
“And you think it’s true? That you could ever hurt me? You know that’s not true, you are the kindest, most gentle person I know, you would never hurt someone on purpose,” You explained.
“No, you will never hurt me, because you are healed, and you will be ok, we will be ok,” You finished, lacing your fingers together with his, squeezing lightly. He gently squeezed back, smiling down at you. For a few minutes you walked in silence, enjoying the warm summer day at your hands snugly wrapped around one another’s.
“[Y/n] would you like to go out with me?” Bucky asked. Surprise caught in your throat, you hadn’t thought Bucky would come around so soon. You walked a few more paces, surprise silencing you.
“Oh god, sorry, that was a bit abrupt, sorry if I made you uncomfortable, you don’t have to go if you don’t want to,”
“Buck, I’d love to,” You decided as you arrived back at the tower, catching the elevator up.
“Good,” Bucky whispered as he pulled you in for a quick kiss. As soon as your lips met, the elevator dinged and the doors parted.
“[Y/n] WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT DATING MASTER ASSASSINS?!” Tony barked as he saw you and Bucky in the elevator.
“TO NOT TO,” You responded before pressing your lips back to Bucky’s. You pulled Bucky from the elevator and off to the living room. There you saw Steve on the couch.
“So you finally did it huh? Steve asked.
“If you hurt her, I will beat you senseless,” Steve warned, never looking up from his book.
“Noted,” Bucky gulped as you led him down the hall, giggling all the way. You came back around to the kitchen, leaning against the counter, Bucky pinning you there, smashing his lips to yours. This was turning out to be one of the best summer visits yet
It had been hours since you were supposed to be asleep, but
here you were, on your balcony, watching cars fly by on the streets below. You
didn’t care if you were in pajama pants and a bra, the cold air felt nice on
your skin anyway. No one should be awake at this time, you thought, but that
made you a hypocrite.
You ran through your possible stressors. Exams, loose
friendships, homesickness… none of them applied to you, at least at the moment.
You were just, well… awake.
You jumped slightly as the sudden tune of your cellphone interrupting
the quiet whispering of the streets below, the melody peeking through the crack
under your balcony door. You sighed; You were awake already so you might as
well answer it.
Padding inside and shutting the sliding door behind you with
a soft click. You made sure to lock it before plucking the cold phone off the
kitchen counter, “Hello?”
A deep yet soft voice rumbled through, “I knew you’d be awake.”
You smiled. It was Taeyong.
“How do you know you didn’t wake me up?” You whispered quietly,
laughing softly at his behavior. It only reminded you of how much you missed him.
He was just across the campus in the men’s dorm, but fuck if you cared.
Distance was still distance and you felt utterly alone.
“Your voice,” He
muttered, “It wasn’t course or quiet.
You smiled lightly, “Yeah,” Taeyong knew you best.
“Did you take medication?”
You scoffed, “You think I didn’t try that? It wore off hours
ago,” the line went quiet. The only sound was your breathing mixed with the
slightly staticky sound of his. You headed back to your room and collapsed on
your bed, curling into the sheets. Tears that would have slid silently down
your cheeks soaked directly into the sheets instead. You liked to imagine he
was there with you, wiping them off, “I can’t sleep. Why can’t I fucking sleep.”
“I know,” He
whispered, “Want me to come over?”
You sat up and laid on your back instead, rubbing your eyes
with the back of your hand to clear the blurriness. You didn’t respond,
pressing the cold phone harder against your ear instead. You whimpered, letting
a sad, pitiful “aghhhhhhh!” escape
into the receiver, “I swear if there’s some sort of sleep god who’s getting a
kick outta this, I’m gonna beat their ass.”
Taeyong’s chuckled, “You
do that. Open the door for me?”
You knit your brow, “How did you get here so fast? And I
know you have a spare key, dumbass.”
He didn’t respond, making you pull the electronic away from
your ear when the silence got lengthy, “Taeyong?” He had ended the call at
least twenty seconds ago, you noted, still being shocked when then door to your
bedroom opened abruptly.
“You scared me!” You chastised, putting the phone on the nightstand
and crossing your arms over your chest. You had kinda forgotten that you weren’t
wearing a shirt.
He smirked and laughed lightly as you pulled the sheets up
past your chest, burrowing into the warm linen, “Sorry.”
“Shut up, I know you’re not,” You turned on your side, “Get
You could feel him smiling, choosing to ignore it and close
your eyes as you felt the bed dip with his weight. He shifted until he comfortably
laid across from you, jacket gone. A
pair of lips pressed against your forehead and he slung an arm over your
abdomen, making you curl up into him. He rubbed the small of your back as you
felt your thoughts fade, even losing focus on the soft ministrations he was
exercising on your body. He pecked your lips, smiling at your peaceful resting
My Knight of Hell (Demon!Dean x Reader) Part 1 (Did I ever post this?)
I’m posting this because I have no clue if I ever did? If I did, sorry. If I didn’t, very sorry.
One Month Later
I left work and walked down the street, peeked down the
alley as I had ever since that man was shot. I kept my eye on the obituaries to
see if a picture of the man or the name Dean was mentioned, but nothing. Maybe
he survived? Passed out from shock? I continued down the illuminated street
when I looked at the bar on the corner. A man in a red button up and black
t-shirt stood under the street lamp, leaning against the post. I did a double
take, not believing my eyes.
the Black Lives Matter Korea March and Vigil pt. I
as you guys know, the Black Life Matters Korea march and vigil was two weekends ago, on December 13th. i asked Sherita Rogers, the woman responsible for initiating and spearheading this event, about the creation of the march and vigil, and how it was put together:
“I was talking to friends the Friday of the 5th and I saw Seoul’s Michael Brown Vigil was scheduled for that Saturday and realistically I would not be able to financially make a trip up there. So I reached out to three people plus a friend who’s wife (who is over Brown and Busan, the Org, I planned the Awareness March and Vigil through) was in the hospital giving birth at the time. They are Tony (Courtney) Wong, Christy Swain, Rachel Werz and Marit Turner. I did it, because I was tired of just posting the wrong I was seeing on facebook, I was tired of being a silent voice and I am ultimately tired. I also realized I struggled with see what was tearing my group apart at home while I was living abroad.
I also know Busan has a large community of Expats and a good percentage of minorities that are still unknown to the Korean Community, so I wanted to 1. Put my face out there for them to see and 2. Express that the images they may see on television aren’t the whole picture of black population in the US.”
those who came met at Table Talk English Cafe in KSU to make posters [which i sadly missed]. after that, everyone assembled outside where Sherita got on the megaphone and gave us some instructions as to what we were going to do, reminded us we wanted to accomplish, and with the help of a Korean volunteer taught us one of the Korean chants, “소중한 흑인 생명”.
in a facebook post the day before, Sherita told us:
"This is NOT A PROTEST, it’s a March and Awareness Vigil. It’s intention is to bring an awareness to the community abroad about what is happening in the United States. It’s intent is to show a unified community against inequality. We have the cooperation of the police and the community, and an agreement the participants will have a peaceful demonstration throughout the event".
i met the others outside of the cafe feeling really vulnerable, feeling like i was on the edge of breaking down. as we began to walk side by side, chanting and raising signs and voices i started to warm up and feel stronger, that i wasn’t alone. employees and officers with the Busan Police department marched in front, and alongside us, stopping cars and holding traffic on the side streets so that we could cross together as one group.
many people just stared on, possibly because they couldn’t understand what was going on, or they were just surprised to see a group of foreigners walking down the street in a march, but not all of them did. there were some 아줌마’s and 아저씨’s standing on the side of the road, on scooters waiting for us to cross the street, and peeking out of stores who silently acknowledged us and what we had to say. a head nod, a smile, and even one older woman who pumped her fist along with our chant. one young woman stood to the side and yelled “화이팅!!” as we passed by. i think it meant a lot to us, that our message was being received, and accepted by locals.
we eventually made it to the beach and started the vigil. Sherita read us some facts about percentages of people sent to jail, frisked, and searched based on their race/ethnicity.
“Police killings by race: 1.47 million whites, 31.17 million blacks between the ages of 15 and 19 [according to a federal study from 2010 to 2012].”
after that, some volunteers came forward to read poems, excerpts, and shared their personal thoughts. afterwards, we lit candles and had a moment of silence for 4 minutes and 30 seconds, to represent the 4 and a half hours that Mike Brown’s body lay on the ground after he was murdered. when the moment of silence was finished, two children came forward, and with Sherita read the names of innocent Black victims of violence from 1955 to today, including Emmett Till. afterwards we blew out our candles, and those who stayed shuffled over to HQ to warm up and talk about the events of the day. i’ll post the videos i have of the vigil on here within the next week after editing them.
overall, i think we accomplished our goal. there was a good number of people who came together considering the event was put together in about a week, and we did attract quite a bit of attention. it was uplifting seeing some positive responses and support for our message, and i think when everything was said and done, our hearts felt a tiny bit lighter.
Niall parked the Range Rover in the driveway, and switched off the engine. “Deo texted me. Everybody’s inside waitin’ for us.” He leaned his head back and closed his eyes. “Let’s just sit here and enjoy the silence for another minute.”
You unbuckled your seatbelt and sighed. “So, would now be a good time to remind you that inviting ALL of our friends over for a Christmas Eve game night was your idea?” You tipped your head to the side to gaze at your boyfriend. You smirked at the scowl forming on his lips, with his brow furrowed and strong profile bathed in the soft street light. He peeked an eye open at you, scowling harder at you barely being able to hold back your smug laughter. “No, in fact it would not be a good time.” Your laughter burst out and you reached over and pinched at his side. He wrapped his long fingers around your wrist and yanked you over the console. You yelped and squealed, a rush of excitement flowing through your stomach at the sudden closeness of your bodies. “You think you’re so funny don’t ya?” You bit your lip and nodded. “Hilarious.” You pressed your lips to his, and moaned into the kiss.