stories to share

Fluffy the Tortoise

When I was a little girl, I had a pet tortoise. I named it ‘Fluffy’ because I always wanted a pet named Fluffy (furthermore I had no authority to name pets, my brother always gets to name our cats) 

We had 2 tortoises as a matter of fact. One for me, one for my brother. We kept them in this container and it was kinda high so they can’t flip over. One day, I went to visit Fluffy and it’s buddy but there was only one tortoise in it. I asked my brother, 

“What happened to Fluffy? I can’t see him!”

“Fluffy ran away” he said 

Fluffy is a tortoise so it couldn’t have gotten far. So little me searched high and low for it but to my dismay, it simply vanished. 

So a few days ago, I told this story to my cousin. While I was telling the story, I found myself stopping mid-sentence as a huge wave of realization crashed into me. Fluffy didn’t run away. 

FLUFFY DIED. 

My brother hid the truth from me to protect my feelings. 

It took me 20 years to realize this.

On Mermaids:

But what if mermaids only appeared humanoid at the surface?
What if, the deeper they dove, the more fish-like they became?

The light doesn’t penetrate as deeply as they swim lower in the ocean, so they adapt; eyes growing smaller, gills larger, scales along their backs emerge and spread out along their limbs, glowing softly at first, then more radiant as the darkness becomes more encompassing.

Mermaids at the bottom of the sea are hardly maids at all, but more like the creatures in dark fantasies that haunt children’s nightmares, with numerous limbs and sharp teeth. Pale and translucent skin, or else pitch black to blend in with their surroundings.

Maybe when they die at those depths, they rise to the surface and don’t change back to their human forms.
They wash up on shore as massive beasts, and humans cower in fear, afraid of the unknown things that lurk in the waters.

Stories of giant squids and colossal whales spread throughout mankind, and soon mermaids are more of a myth than anything, since the surface is a dangerous place now, and the hidden depths of the ocean are safer.

Over time their forms became less intimidating, as they still need the light to survive, but are shy of the ever present human gaze. Many take lesser forms; species of fish that can enjoy the warmth of the sun without becoming conspicuous.

And as time goes on, mermaids that once took humanoid forms no longer exist, but the variety of their species remains rich and diverse.

Some remain at the deepest of depths, introverted and peaceful with the silence of nothing. Others prefer the surface, where the light is constant and the colours vibrant, but grow smaller to avoid predation.

And then some, still fond of humans and more connected with their past selves, find they need air to survive, and breach surface frequently, living in relative peace along side us.

Maybe dolphins are these such creatures, sharing in human intelligence and mannerisms but no longer able to transform; a skill long lost to the ages.

The ocean is a mysterious world we know very little about, so why not?

ok so the other day i was at sears. I was in the baby section. Im standing there looking at clothes and a lady who works there comes up and is like “oh are you expecting?” And i was like “uhhhh” and because im a dumbass i was like “no i already delivered.” And she was like “How long ago?” And i was just like “two weeks.” And she said “wow! You look great! When i had my first son, i looked like a mess for six months. Is it a boy or a girl?” And i was just awkwardly like “a girl….” And she asked her name and i said Chernobyl and she was like “oh what a cute name! It sounds really familiar.” And i honestly just stood there going through all that and pretending i had a human baby two weeks ago named Chernobyl because i didnt wanna tell this poor lady i was buying baby clothes for my fucking baby opossum

My boyfriend told me over text that he didn't know the Minotaur story
  • Boyfriend: I... I don't even know the story that well babe, I can't even say xD
  • Me: Okay so
  • Me: Poseidon gives a bull to King Minos, the best and shiniest bull you ever saw, and he's like "You can have this, but only if you promise to sacrifice it to me later" and Minos is like "Sure yeah okay man whatever" so Poseidon sends this bestest bull ever galloping up out of the salty sea spray, and everyone standing around is like "Hot fuck look at that bull" And Minos agrees, and he likes the bull SO much he decides to just quietly sort of...keep it. And he does kill a bull for Poseidon but it's one of his own, lame normal bulls, and Poseidon's no pushover so of course he notices.
  • Me: Poseidon is also notoriously easily angered, and he's royal pissed about this, so he comes up with one of the most devious punishments ever, and he infects Minos' wife Pasiphae with a desperate, DESPERATE thirst for the bull. Like she can think of nothing but getting some of that hot Bull D.
  • Boyfriend: ..........Thefuck.
  • Me: But it's hard to convince a bull, especially a divinely spawned bull, to fuck you if you are in fact not a cow but a human queen, so she comes up with a plan
  • Boyfriend: I thought some god comes down in bull form and fucks her??
  • Me: Ohh, no no no, that's the much much more tame story of Europa, who has sex with Zeus in bull form. This is different
  • Me: She goes to the best inventor she knows, Daedalus, and she's like "I need this bull to fuck me I NEED IT" and Daedalus is like "That's really weird maybe you should talk to someone" and she's like "I am talking to you and I am your queen so you better fucking make this happen for me I am going to peel my own skin off if I don't get some bull dick ASAP. But he doesn't want me because I am not fat, four-legged, and mooing."
  • Boyfriend: Oh..... oh no.
  • Me: So Daedalus shrugs, probably shudders a little, and builds the prettiest, most fuckable wooden cow a bull ever saw, but he makes it hollow, presumably with some openings in some awkward places.
  • Boyfriend: OH GOD. NO.
  • Me: So Pasiphae puts this monstrosity in the field with the bull, climbs in it, and waits. And Daedalus really is a skilled inventor, and he apparently knows what a bull likes, because Pasiphae finally gets the hot bull loving she's been dreaming of
  • Boyfriend: I........ I need an aspirin. That is disgusting.
  • Me: Only she apparently hasn't been tracking her cycles, because she gets pregnant, and births the minotaur and King Minos is like "What the fuck?" and Pasiphae is like "Honey I need to tell you something"
  • Me: And that is how it happened
  • Boyfriend: That is NOT HOW THAT WORKS
  • Me: Welcome to Mythology.
  • fanfic writer: *writing* Oh wow, they are going to love this. This is by far my best work!
  • fic: *witty lines* *perfect love making* *fluffy enough to kill us all* *a dash of angst, a smidgen of hurt/comfort*
  • fanfic writer: Oh man. This is it. This will be my legacy! *sweats into fic* *bleeds into fic* *cries into fic* *spends days perfecting the grammar and verbage and sex scenes* *has 15 betas look over it*
  • fanfic writer: Okay. It is finally time to release my baby on the world. Here you go fandom. You're welcome.
  • fandom: Ha, cute. *like* *kudos*
  • fanfic writer: :/
  • * * *
  • same fanfic writer: *writing* Whatever. This is shit, I don't even care right now. A singing squirrel? Sure, let's do it. Haha, cheesy lines that make no sense, sure. Grammatical errors out the wazoo? Why not. No one's going to read this piece of crap anyway, I literally wrote it on a scrap of 1 ply toilet paper with a broken yellow crayon.
  • fanfic writer: LOL *post*
  • fandom: OMG THIS IS THE BEST THING YOU HAVE EVER GRANTED US WITH, WHERE HAS THIS BEEN ALL MY LIFE, OMG, I NEED A SEQUEL IMMEDIATELY, PLEASE. WHAT THE. I'M NOT EVEN WORTHY. *kudosrebloglikereccomment*
  • fanfic writer: *sigh*

Shitty knows way too much about housing codes and property law.  He initially learned property law to save the Haus from being condemned, but then he realized that reading archaic, flowery law opinions while high was the most fucking hilarious thing ever.  Everyone at his law school is confused by and a little afraid of Mr. B. Knight, because while no one else wants to touch all those old, mostly nonsensical British common law cases, Shitty eats that shit up

On Thursday, we reached the absolute a special number!

That’s right! Caretaker AU now has 9,999 followers! The community built around this blog is something far beyond our wildest dreams. This wouldn’t be possible without you guys! And that’s why we want to say…

Thank you!

Thank you to everyone who follows, likes our posts, and reblogs the comic pages. Thank you to everyone who submits and enjoys the memes. Thank you to all the translators and dub groups who introduce the comic to new audiences. Thank you to everyone who fuels us with coffee. Without all of you, this comic wouldn’t have made it this far.

We are so happy and thrilled to have such supporting and wonderful followers. Your excitement and love for this comic gives us DETERMINATION.

The story is far from over, and we hope you stick with us until the end!

Iwaoi Dance Au!
Story shared by sweet Anon!! Thank you!!! This is wonderful!!

INTRODUCING: Share Your Story

I believe that every person holds so many memories within that are precious and hold a very special meaning. Here in Reef Mag, we have decided to make a column where you can share your stories. We will be posting a question every week, for you to answer with a memory/story you cherish and submit to us. We will gather them all, and compile a huge article of all your stories and post them every Sunday, for you to read over a cup of coffee.

Hopefully they will make you cheer up if you’re having a bad day or make you have a good laugh reading other people’s stories. Whenever someone tells me a story I feel I have seen a glimpse of their soul, a lovely sight. I hope you do too.

This week’s question is:

What is your favorite autumn memory?

Tell us about your adventures, non- stop laughter, silly memories, anything that makes you love life.

You can submit your story here, make sure to write your name &  country (optional).

This is how we are going to divide each story (not with your tumblr url). Anonymous submissions are also accepted. 

Photographer: Caryn