stop making me love your freckles more

‘  all i need is for you to stay by my side.  ’
‘  all of the love songs remind me of you.  ’
‘  all of the words in the world can’t show how much you mean to me.  ’
‘  boy,  could i use your love  &  affection right now.  ’
‘  concept:  we’re both awake at 4 a.m.  i call you to hear your sleepy voice.  ’
‘  cute thing that you do:  the most stereotypical giggle  &  then hiding your face.  ’
‘  don’t let this be temporary.  ’
‘  don’t worry about me.  i just want to know you’re okay.  ’
‘  every day i get to see your gorgeous face is a good day.  ’
‘  everything about our relationship feels so natural  &  perfect.  ’
‘  feelings change,  but mine about you won’t.  ’
‘  hey,  guess what?  i love you.  ’
‘  hold me tight  &  tell me you love me.  ’
‘  i always daydream about living with you.  ’
‘  i am so exhausted,  but i’d sleep so much better with your arms around me.  ’
‘  i can’t help but imagine living with you years from now.  ’
‘  i can’t keep setting fires to keep you warm.  ’
‘  i could listen to you talk about the things you love forever.  ’
‘  i don’t think i’ll ever stop wanting you.  ’
‘  i don’t want those memories any more.  ’
‘  i forget who  &  where i am when we kiss.  ’
‘  i get that warm,  pleasant feeling in my chest when i’m with you.  ’
‘  i hope with all my heart that you love me like i love you.  ’
‘  i hope you feel the same way you make me feel.  ’
‘  i just want to softly cuddle with you  &  count the freckles on your cheek  &  i want to run my fingers through your hair.  ’
‘  i know it’s getting scary,  but you’ve just got your perfect self out of bed  &  do the best with what you’ve got.  i believe in you.  ’
‘  i love looking into your squinted eyes while we laugh.  ’
‘  i love when you give me little kisses on my hand  &  cheek  &  neck.  it makes me feel so loved.  ’
‘  i never thought i’d deserve the love you give me.  ’
‘  i think you’ve shown me what love really is.  ’
‘  i want the only thing between our bodies to be our love.  ’
‘  i want the only thing between our love to be our lips.  ’
‘  i want to bury my face in the crook of your neck until we both fall asleep.  ’
‘  i want to listen to the beautiful song of your voice for hours.  ’
‘  i want to make you just as happy as you make me.  ’
‘  i want to wake up to your smile.  ’
‘  i want to wrap my arms around you at 3 a.m.  &  tell you i love you.  ’
‘  i want you to be my yesterday,  my today,  &  my tomorrow.  ’
‘  i want you.  ’
‘  i will always love you.  even when you don’t think it’s a possibility,  i am going to love you.  ’
‘  i would sleep so much better with you right next to me.  ’
‘  if only you could see your angelic self from my perspective.  ’
‘  if you frequently play with my hair,  i might just fall in love with you.  ’
‘  it’s amazing feeling the warmth of your love.  ’
‘  it’s okay to have a bad day every once in a while.  ’
‘  it’s so much easier to fall asleep when you’re in bed next to me,  running your gentle fingers down my back while we softly smile at each other through the darkness.  ’
‘  i’d wait a lifetime to be in your arms.  ’
‘  i’m all yours.  always.  ’
‘  i’m always going to support you.  without even a second thought,  i’ll be there when you need me.  i want what’s best for you.  ’
‘  just knowing you’re there comforts me.  ’
‘  just thinking about how you make me blush.  ’
‘  keep in mind all the things that you have to look forward to,  babe.  ’
‘  kiss me under the starry sky.  ’
‘  let me know if you’re in love with me too.  ’
‘  let today be the day that everything changes.  you are capable of so much.  ’
‘  let’s go on a cute,  cliché date.  ’
‘  let’s sleep together under the stars.  ’
‘  make yourself  &  your own happiness you priority.  ’
‘  make yourself happy before you worry about me.  ’
‘  my kindness isn’t weakness.  ’
‘  my new years resolution is for all our arguments to be settled because i know you’ll still have my love  ’
‘  oh,  what a privilege it is to matter to you.  ’
‘  our love could make flowers bloom int he dead of winter.  ’
‘  pet names are my weakness.  ’
‘  start setting boundaries.  enough is enough.  ’
‘  thank you for caring like nobody else ever has.  ’
‘  thank you for caring when nobody else has.  ’
‘  the world is going to do something amazing for you.  ’
‘  there are times to power through it  &  there are times to say no.  ’
‘  when i look at the stars i can’t help but think of you.  ’
‘  when you look at me,  the butterflies flutter.  ’
‘  you are my happiness  &  you don’t even know it.  ’
‘  you are my starlight.  ’
‘  you are the one i’d do anything for.  ’
‘  you are what puts my mind to rest when i can’t sleep.  ’
‘  you don’t need anyone to rescue you.  you can do it all on your own,  babe.  i know you can.  ’
‘  you feel like home.  ’
‘  you have a smile that lights up my world.  ’
‘  you have no idea how proud of you i am.  you’ve done so much for everyone.  thank you.  ’
‘  you stole my heart,  but i’ll let you keep it.  ’
‘  you’re made of stars  &  you’re my favorite constellation.  ’
‘  you’re my favorite notification.  ’
‘  you’re my home  &  i’m homesick.  ’
‘  you’re not just your mistakes  &  you deserve to be happy.  ’
‘  you’re so much more than good enough.  don’t ever doubt that.  ’
‘  you’re soft  &  sweet  &  too good for me.  ’
‘  you’re something special babe.  you can make a difference.  ’
‘  you’re the happy part of my days.  ’
‘  you’re the one i’m looking for.  ’
‘  you’re the one thing i think about when i wake up every morning.  ’
‘  you’re the reason why i want to get up every morning.  ’
‘  you’re waking,  talking,  living,  loving poetry.  ’

Got You Under My Skin

How about a jun soulmate au where each time they make skin to skin contact, a freckle appears on each of them where it occurred, and once they realize who their soulmate is, the freckles stop appearing on the one who figured it out, but don’t go away. Bye! I love your list thingies by the way

lmao i made so many bad puns dont hate me i love puns

1.3k words unedited

Originally posted by wonnmoo

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

16 for sure, and whoever you want to pair it with!!

16. things you said with no space between us

Philip wasn’t the type to, well, let’s take that back. He was almost the spitting image of his father. He never let anyone step over him, or his family name. So when he met you, you were sure he’d hate you. You weren’t as outspoken as he was. You prefer working on the sidelines. It was away from all of the crowds, and that felt more comfortable. 

As you laid on your bed, his body beneath yours as you played with his curls. He kissed your neck softly, saying sweet nothings you couldn’t quite make out. You kissed his biggest freckle, and whispered into his skin.

“Do you really care about me? I’m nothing compared to you.” You mumbled it so low, and hoped he didn’t hear the words. 

His lips stopped on your neck, and he looked up at you. He touched the sides of your face, your eyes meeting his.

“Y/N, I love you. I love you more than the stars in the sky or the grass on the ground. I can’t imagine my world without you in it. You’re everything compared to me. You make me a better person. I love you.”

He pressed his forehead to yours, “And anyone who tells you otherwise is a liar. And, could you tell me if someone does? They have no right.” His tone turned slightly aggressive, like it always did when he began to argue.

You pressed your lips against his, still feeling your chest flutter, “No need.”

anonymous asked:

I don't know if you are still accepting fluff requests but maybe one where Dean stays the night for the first time and in the morning he notices your freckles for the first time because you aren't wearing makeup

This was fun to write, because I have freckles and I’m honestly not a big fan of them🙈

Pairing: Dean Ambrose x Reader

Word Count: 411

Keep reading

You. (Dean X Reader Soulmate AU)

Short description: Set in supernatural universe. You wake up one day, with no memory or knowledge as to how you got in the middle of a forest. All you know is youre a hunter and a good one. Almost getting killed, however, leads to you meeting the boys. Dean, instantly, feels different with you as you feel different with him. You fall in love, and knowing you have the name ‘Dean’ on your wrist calms you. But without being able to tell Dean your name, you panic. Little did you know, Dean already knows your name.

Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four

Characters: Dean, Castiel, Reader, Slight mention of chuck, Sam, Bobby

Warnings: Angst, lots of it, slight fluff, friends reference(let’s see if y'all find it)

Word count: 1691

A/n: Sorry I took a while to upload five ! Its just writers block *sigh* Anyways let me know what you think ! And sorry its a bit short. Promise they’ll start to get longer and more action ! If y'all want to be tagged, let me know. @supernatural-jackles @angelkurenai

Chapter Five


Why ? Father, why ? Is it your will to have me love her ? Is it your will to have me protect her while she is happy in someone else’s arms ? I don’t understand any of this. This is not a blessing, it is a curse. I am her guardian angel. I’m so confused on why you let me love her. She deserves her real soulmate. Who am I to be in the middle ? I may love her with every fiber, every feather on wings, with every ounce of my angelic body, she is my grace. We, angels, are not supposed to love or be loved, yet, you made an exception with me. Why ? Do you hate me so much, despise me that much to let me fall for one that was never mine ? She belongs to him. And you knew, even if I was given the opportunity, it was never me. It was him. I guess what I had done was for the best. But I was stupid, so stupid. I let it all happen all over again. Even if I erased her memories, she still has love in her heart for me. Are my powers not strong enough to remove her love ? I swore I’d never make her suffer again. And look what happened ! It happened just like the first time. I am poison. That is all I am. She is the antidote, the cure. I need her. Without her, I don’t serve a purpose. But, there is someone else out there, sicker. Worse than I ever could be. And she, she is their cure. Who am I to stand in between the salvation of this man ? She is his cure. You gave me one purpose, to protect her. I failed. I didn’t protect her. I hurt her. I could never forgive myself for that. I’ll just erase her memories again. But, I can’t risk her beautiful self. I know the consequences of doing it again. The first time went amazingly well. It erased her memories and she only lost the ones of me. But, if I do it again, I’m risking her entirely. She would die on the inside. She would forget everything, forget who she is, lose herself completely. I cannot do that to her. She is far to valuable to be lost. I should disappear. Be gone and never come back. As I said, I am only poison.

Please forgive me.

I flew off and headed to California where an old friend lived. He always had the best advice. He always helped. Why would it be different this time ? By the time I got to the state, I was tired. Well, my vessel was. I made my way to a room in a motel close to me and as I entered, I removed my trenchcoat. I walked to the bed and sat down and stared at the wall. It was such an interesting patterns. It was pineapples. Apples that pine ? That does not make sense. Apples…

F.   L.   A.   S.   H.   B.   A.    C.    K

“Castiel !” I heard my name. It was the soft voice that always gave me goosebumps at the melodic words. I flew as fast as I could towards the voice.


“There you are.” She smiled with such grace, it would put mine to shame. “I was beginning to think you wouldn’t come.”

“Why would I not come ?”

“Its an expression, Castiel.” She laughed. I didn’t know what was funny but I smiled at her sweet laughter. She was leaning on a tree so I inched closer. She got close to me and hugged me.

“Why are you squeezing me with your body ? ” she laughed even more. I could not find the reason for her laughter.

“Its a hug Cas. Here, put your arms around me.”

“Will it make you happy ?”

“Yes, it will.” I placed my arms around the small of her back. It was…. Nice. It felt warm. I liked this hug thing she was doing. I pulled her in closer, embracing her smell. It smelled of beautiful apples. Her signature smell. I never told her but when I would catch a bit of her smell, it would bring happiness to me. I kept hugging her, as she called it. I didn’t want to let her go. In my arms, she was safe. I felt her move a bit and slowly kiss my cheek. I tensed up but it felt very nice. It was warm and her lips were so soft. When she moved away, her touch lingered softly on my cheek. It was a beautiful feeling. It was in the moment I knew deep inside I was gone. I was completely and utterly in love with (Y/n).

E.   N.   D.   F.   L.   A.   S.   H.   B.   A.   C.   K

Dammit. This is never going to work. I’m never going to stop loving her. This leaves only one option left for me and its probably the best.

I will fight for her.


Sometimes, life can be unfair. Sometimes, it could be rewarding, and sometimes, it can kick you in the crotch and spit on your neck fantastic. Dean had taken you strolling in his impala. God, what a beautiful car she was. You couldn’t help but stare in awe. The first time you didn’t pay attention at all. You were just freaked out. But this time, it was beautiful. It made you feel home. Dean was driving with a small smirk on his lips. You sneaked glances here and then, trying to continue your mission of counting all of his freckles. He caught you once and you turned around, turning fifty shades of red. He laughed at your sudden embarrassment. “Aw, sweetheart, you don’t have to be embarrassed. Its just me.” You couldn’t turn around. He stopped the car at a red light and lightly grabbed your chin, making you face him. His beautiful green eyes locked with yours. It sent shivers down your spine. You had know this man for 3 days tops and you felt more for him than you’ve ever felt for anyone. You couldn’t say you loved him. You wouldn’t say those word until you knew that every drop of your soul meant them. But you couldn’t deny this sudden jolt of happiness, curiousness, sense of adventure, of things that got your blood boiling and your heart skipping beats. He gave you a purpose. He gave you that small jolt of life.

“Hey.” His voice broke your train of thought.


“Hungry ?” You giggled.


“To the pie !” Dean did a left turn and after about 20 more minutes of driving, you got close to a small diner. The smell of pie was overwhelming. It sinked into the car. You moaned slightly at the delicious smell. You realized the noise you made and opened your eyes quickly. Dean was staring at you wide-eyed, then a smile broke into his face. “Well, sweety, we gotta take this slow.” You turned a deep shade of red. “I’m just messing with you, I just love the way you blush, its very adorable.” You looked up at his words, your eyes locking. Dean joined you and began to blush, realizing what he just spilled. He quickly jumped out the car and practically ran to the diner. You couldn’t help but laugh the entire way in. You ran after him. “Wait up!”

You couldn’t help but think that Dean really is the man you’ve been waiting for your whole life. Even though you didn’t remember much, you knew you had been looking for him. But as much as it burned inside of you to just run off with Dean, you needed to find out why Castiel had your name and why you had his. It terrified you at looking for the answers but you knew you had to do it. It would eat you inside slowly if you didn’t. Hopefully, Dean would help you. You trusted him and Sam, especially Bobby. If they could help you, maybe everything wouldn’t be as bad as you thought. You’ve probably been through worse, you thought. Bobby had left out some things and you knew he did. Maybe he left them out because he didn’t want to add all these problems you had. You knew you were sick. There was no denying that. There was no denying the fact that inside you felt a certain way that would be too hard to express in words but if thoughts became actions, your head would burn into a billion pieces. Your memories may be gone, but feelings just can’t leave. You have this pit in your chest. But it wasn’t pain or anger or even happiness, it was a pit of feelings for someone else. But you didn’t know who. It couldn’t be Dean because he’d just met you, and with the guys, you just quite couldn’t get that feeling that filled that hole of insanity trapped inside you. It grabbed at your soul like a hungry rat fighting for its meals. No, you thought. No, no. I will not let these thoughts cloud my head again, not again, you thought. Not now. I’m with Dean.


I knew she was with Dean. I can hear her. But I wish I couldn’t. I wish I couldn’t feel anything. And no matter how much it pained me to do this, I will fight Dean for her. I have her name and she has mine, I have every right. But Dean is a friend and I couldn’t hurt him. I won’t do it. But I just can’t live without her. Sometimes, I guess, in life, you have to make sacrifices. I will sacrifice everything for her. I would trade my wings for her touch in a heart beat. She is the sun to my Earth. The honey to my bees. The grace to my body. She is my sole purpose of existing. She will be happy and I will stop at absolutely nothing to get her. I love you (Y/n). I’m coming for you.


Dammit. Were having another war. Fabulous.

Originally posted by pilesofsmile

Originally posted by multi----fandoms


Shout out to the reposters. Thank you ! It means a lot. @mrswhozeewhatsis @sparkzonfer @gabby913 @shippingshiperton @nitelotus @thefangirl54 @winchesterforever12 @secret-stashes @allinhishands


anonymous asked:

OQ + anything from the 1800's, please?

You did say anything!  So I hope you like it. :)

Until That Day: 

A widower and father in good health, of decent appearance and substantial means seeks a wife. She must be intelligent, in good health and be willing to become a mother to two young children. If interested, please write to the following address.

Dear Mr. Locksley,

I am writing in response to your ad which ran in the Philadelphia Gazette two days ago in which you expressed an interest in finding a wife. My name is Regina Mills. I am unmarried, mother to a seven year old son, and have no remaining attachments to Philadelphia as both of my parents are now deceased. I would have no difficulty in acting as a mother to your children if you would be willing to act as a father to my son.  I am in good health, am fairly well educated, enjoy reading, playing the piano and spinnet and do not shy away from hard work.

If you believe we could be compatible in marriage, please respond to this letter. If I hear nothing, I shall assume you have found someone else with whom to share your life. If that is the case, I wish you and your children great joy.


Regina Mills

Dear Mrs. Mills,

I was honored to receive your reply to my query, and the fact that you are already a mother makes me believe that we might get on well together. You stated in your letter that your boy was seven years old. which means he would be the oldest and would therefore bear some limited responsibilities on the farm. My children are still too young to do so, for my son is three, and my daughter is but four months old.

I must be completely honest with you, Miss Mills, for it is only fair that before you accept my proposal you become aware of facts which may well cause you to decide against me. My children have two different mothers. Roland’s mother was my beloved wife who sadly passed away hours after he was born due to complications during his delivery.  But my daughter’s mother is a singer who passed through Springfield with her touring company several months ago. I was weak and lonely and missing my wife, and the two of us engaged in the sort of relations of which I’m not proud. I thought I’d never see her again, but four months ago she showed up on my doorstep and handed me a baby she claimed to be my daughter. I have neither heard from nor seen her since, nor do I expect to ever hear from her again.  So you see, my daughter is illegitimate, but I love her every bit as much as I do my son.

I cannot fault you  if you prefer to end our correspondence at this point, and I wish both you and your son much happiness no matter what you decide to do.

Yours truly,

Robin Locksley

Keep reading


This is Dean’s hair color:

This is Lucifer’s hair color:

Luci’s hair looks more gold bc of the lighting in this photo but it’s a light blond. Dean’s hair is somewhere between blond and brown (sandy brown, maybe?). They aren’t the same color. Dean’s hair is darker. Lucifer’s eyes are blue, Dean’s are green. Dean has freckles, Lucifer does not. 

Hair color on SPN from lightest to darkest-

Mary (blond), Lucifer (blond), Jack (brown-blond), Dean (sandy brown), Sam (milk chocolate brown), Cas (very very dark brown).

Stop making Dean and Lucifer look identical. Obviously ya’ll are amazing and I love you and don’t go back and change your art bc of me but seriously if I have to spend ten minutes staring at a work of art trying to figure out if it’s Dean or Lucifer ONE MORE TIME I swear I’m gonna flip. I understand if you’re not using reference but please keep this in mind bc it’s just easier if you make sure the differences between characters are clearer.

 Thank you, this has been a PSA of hair color.


“Daddy, daddy, wake up!” your son, Bobby, screamed as he bounced up onto Dean’s stomach.

Dean groaned and held Bobby’s shoulders still while he checked his watch, six in the morning, great, “Hey buddy” he smiled and tried to wake up more. 

“Daddy, it’s your special day and mommy says you need to get up for your surprise!” he squealed and let Dean pull him down into a hug which quickly turned into a tickle session, “St-stop!” Bobby laughed and kicked his feet. 

“Okay, fine” Dean said with a huge grin, “Let’s go find mommy” 

Dean let Bobby pull him down to the kitchen where he smiled, finding you in one of his shirts and boxers, “Hey, sweetheart” he whispered in your ear, wrapping his arms around your waist and kissing your neck. 

You smiled and leaned back into him, “Happy father’s day” 

“Thanks, but you know, you could have let me sleep in a little bit” he teased and nuzzle against you, relishing in the familiar smell of your shampoo while Bobby sat at the table and colored, waiting for breakfast. 

“We have lots to do today,” you said and put the pancakes on a plate, along with the eggs and bacon. You hear Dean’s stomach growl and turned around to face him, “Eat first,” you said, pecking his lips with a smile, “Then Sam’s coming over for lunch,” Dean smiled at that, “and then we are going to mini golfing-”

“That was my idea, daddy!” Bobby said through a mouthful of food.

Dean smiled, “Sounds perfect, little dude”

“And then, we are having the best burgers in town with lots and lots of pie” you finished, leaning in close to whisper in his ear, “Then you get your present from me”

You nipped his ear and pulled away with a smirk, proud to see you could still make Dean blush after six years. 

“I am one lucky man” he said with a mirroring smirk, brushing your hair out of your face and tucking it behind your ear, “Thank you”

You shook your head and pulled him close by his shirt, “Nope, thank you” 

Dean smiled and pulled you in for a kiss. It was slow and deep, passion filled as Dean conveyed exactly how he was feeling, how lucky he was to have you and a beautiful son, until Bobby started giggling and you both pulled away with a smile. 


“Night,” Bobby yawned, “You’re the best daddy ever”

“Night, buddy” Dean whispered, leaning down to kiss his forehead with a smile. It had been a long day for all of you, but he couldn’t be happier, “Love you”

“M’love you too” he replied sleepily and rolled over onto his stomach, hugging his pillow. Dean smirked at the trait he seemingly passed to his son. 

Walking back to your bedroom, he smiled when he saw you waiting for him in bed, “Well, well, well, look at my present, already unwrapped for me” he sighed and crawled into bed with you.

You giggled as he kissed your neck, “Mmm, happy father’s day, baby” you sighed and rolled him over so you were on top, “Thank you, and I love you so much” you said honestly, kissing his nose 

Dean smiled and ran his hands down your arm, “I love you too, baby, and thanks for making me a dad” he said with a kiss to your lips, “best thing that’s ever happened to me, besides you”

You leaned down to kiss him, the soft caress of lips quickly turning into something more as he tangled his fingers in your hair. You made your way down his neck, kissing and licking his scarred and freckled skin all the way to his waist band of his boxers. Stopping, you looked up and him with a sly smile, his face flushed and green eyes bright, “Ready for your present, big daddy?” you said lowly.

Dean grinned and nodded, letting his head fall back against the pillows, hand in your hair.

 “Best day ever” he sighed before it broke off into a moan. Once more reminding him of just how lucky he was. 

To the library girl, 

I think I felt a little bit in love with you. You were wearing a green hoodie, with your hair in a half messy top bun, grey-blue eyes and some freckles on your nose. You had big dark circles under eyes for studying too much probably. I couldn’t stop looking at you. God you’re so beautiful and it felt like you don’t even know it, wich makes you one hundred times more attractive. I think you caught me starring at you (at least twice), and you gave me the biggest cutest smile.

Hope I’ll see you again.


Insecurities - Preference (4/4)

(Requested for Luke but i felt like giving the other boys some love too, hope thats okay, Enjoy)

Tear after tear fell. You refection in the mirror blurring. A wall separating you from Luke, a brick curtain shielding you from his view. Blissfully unaware in the bedroom, strumming on his guitar as you cried in the bathroom next to him. His ears filled with the sweet music he was making, drowning out the quiet sobs you let out. It was just another night like the rest where you would tare yourself apart in front if the bathroom mirror. Skimming over your body with hate. A hand running through your hair as you pulled the oversized shirt over your head. Able to hide underneath it. Wiping your eyes with a tissue, fixing the mascara trailing down your left cheek. Silently accepting that you would never match her, the girl he had loved before. Believing deep down that he would never be satisfied with you. Nothing could match up to her beauty or personality. Feeling like maybe he would never smile at you like he had with her, he would never wake up; his heart beating faster when he looked over to see you next to him…


Head jolting up you came face to face with him, heart beating off the charts.

“Baby whats wrong?” Hands pulling you round to him, cupping your face as he stared into your soul. Concern washing over his features. Closing your eyes you were pulled into his chest. A hand soothing your back, the other holding you tight against him.

“Shhh let it out its okay.” He whispered into the damp bathroom air. Sobbing louder as you clung to his shirt.

“Whats wrong Y/N? Talk to me…” Finger under your chin causing you to face him your eyes glistened with tears as you began to explain. His eyebrows narrowing as he pulled away from you.

“You think i don’t love you like i loved her? You think you don’t compare to her? You think you don’t make me happy?” He quested as you stood silently.

“You couldn’t be more wrong. Baby shes my past, shes history. Of course she was part of my life but its a part thats over, done and i don’t want to go back to it. I love you, so much. Your beautiful and smart and funny. You love and support me which means so much. Don’t you dare feel like i don’t want you or you don’t compare. I only want to be with you, Y/N not her and don’t want you to be like her i want you to be you…because thats who i love.”

“But Luke..” Tears fell again as you stood feeling mote insecure. His arms wrapping you in a warm hold.

“But nothing.” He whispered into your hair, kissing it lightly and letting out a sigh as his fingers played with the ends of it. Curling strands in his finger tips.

“I love you. Your mine. No her. You. And i will do anything it takes to prove it.”

Not being good enough was just another daily struggle that you had to go through. If it wasn’t failing a test or failing to live up to your families standards, you were filled with a self hatred so strong it was beginning to rule your life. The only good thing you had left was Ashton.
But tonight he was coming to meet your family for the first time, and standing in the mirror of your bathroom you were almost shaking with anticipation.

“Y/N!!! Ashton is here!!”

The nerves rose but as you walked down the staircase your eyes met Ashton who was smiling nervously yet warmly at you. His cheeks flushed a little as he stood awkwardly in your hallway.

“Hey beautiful.” He chirped with a kiss to the cheek sending goose pimples down your spine as you couldn’t hold back from smiling widely at him.

“Beautiful? Well well well Y/N looks like you got yourself something of a blind man.” Stomach dropping you clenched up feeling fear spill into you.

Directing your eyes at Ashton who was now standing with a frown and confused eyes at the comment your older sister had made. The rest of the evening continuing in this way; mother sliding in remarks at your figure and father picking apart your future. The only thing helping was the hand tightly intertwined with yours underneath the table cloth, soothing over your skin as he held it in his.

“Are you okay sweetheart?” His voice whispered in your ear as everybody began to leave the table. Of course you weren’t, being put down in front of him was embarrassing and just added to the hate you felt towards yourself.

“Y/N?” He questioned you, softly rubbing your back. The room was no empty as a singled tear ran down tour cheek. His fingertips wiping it away swiftly.

“Shhh, its okay…” His arms wrapped around you, pulling you close to his warm body. So different from the icy atmosphere your family had created.
His hand running through your hair, as he rocked you slightly.

“Don’t listen to anything they say. Your beautiful. Your smart. Your funny. Your a little weird, but its cute. Your pretty amazing actually…and i love you thats all that matters. I always will, so promise me you wont listen to them.” Your arms wrapped tighter around his waist as he kissed the top of your head.

“Im sorry about my family Ash…”

“No. They should be the ones who are sorry. Okay?” Only nodding you both smiled at each other.

“I kinda wanna get outa here, you know any gorgeous girls who might wanna come?” He pulled a funny face at you making a giggle escape your lips.

“C'mon princess, lets go..”

Fat, ugly, wrong hair colour, disgusting accent…the list went on. Fan hate, the most awful of all. The idea that so many people behind a computer screen could make you feel so worthless was crazy. And no matter how much you tired to cope with it, the struggle to stay strong was becoming hard.

And here you stood, 45 minutes late for dinner with your boyfriend who was waiting outside the bathroom door. Hair never right, makeup smudging. Cloths becoming unattractive. Too slutty, too casual. Becoming insecure of the freckles on your nose that for some reason Calum found cute. And the prominence of your shoulders, thighs too fat, knees too big. Nothing seemed right. It was like the person staring back in the mirror was a stranger, or your worst enemy.

The rage began to build as you watched your reflection. And a blur of items flying round the room was all you could see. Picking up a bottle of shampoo you chucked it hard at the mirror, your fists following it. Glass falling hard to the ground with droplets of blood from your knuckles.

“Y/N! Y/N! Stop!!” Crying hard, you were dragged to the floor, cradled by a large body. Calum. Your breathing was harsh as he held you tight. Mumbling how it was okay under his breath. Your body calming, breathing slowing as you began to feel tired. He moved to reach for a cloth, grabbing some plasters to cover the cuts. Taking his hands in yours he cleaned you up, tears falling as he did. The breakdown past due, as your frustration had been let out.

“Do you want to talk to me about..‘this’?” He was soft not to pressure you.

“Fans. They.., they hate me. And it…, it mak..makes me…i believe them. I…i hate myself.”

“NO! DONT YOU DARE..Im, I’m sorry i don’t mean to shout. But…don’t ever say that. They are silly little girls, you are so much more than they say. I love you so much and i don’t want you to feel this way.” He held onto your body tight again, his lips pressing against your temple comfortingly.

“Look at me… Your beautiful, so beautiful and amazing. Jealousy, thats all it is. I love you so much baby..” Your breathing calmed as he cradled you against him on the cold bathroom floor.

“Lets stay in tonight yeah?” Nodding softly he kissed your cheek lightly.

“I love you, so damn much. Thats all that matters okay?”

“Damn shes fit..” Michaels rough voice sung out as he ogled some model on the tv screen. Your heart pounding a little bit faster as your eyes focused on the stick thin, perfectly made up, fluffy hared woman. Looking back down at yourself, it dropped to the floor. Your meatier frame covered by a band tee, hair pulled into a messy bun, nails chipped and makeup free face allowing a few blemished to show.

Pushing his legs off your lap, you moved quickly making for the stairs. Reaching the bathroom your hand found the makeup bag thrown onto the dresser in your bedroom. Squirting the foundation on your hand you rubbed it over your face followed by a flick of eyeliner and mascara.

“Babe…” His voice followed as he found you in your bedroom.

“What? What are you doing babe?” He looked at you confused as you watched his reflection in the mirror. Standing you began to feel embarrassed at your actions, feeling the blood rise to your cheeks. Your head fell as you stared down at your feet hearing him sigh behind you following his footsteps.

“Heyyy..” His arms wrapped around you, leaning down he kissed the top of your head.

“C'mere.” Turning you around he pulled you close as a single tear slit over your eyelid.

“Baby…no shhh..beautiful girls don’t cry.”

“Then its okay, i can cry then.” Sniffing back another tear you found the courage to look at him. Meeting his warm smile he traced his thumbs under your eyes, wiping away any loose tears.

“Are you blind? Hmm? Your gorgeous. No doubt about that. Kay?” Staring back at him he chuckled taking your loose hands, pulling them across his cheeks to wipe the excess foundation onto his cheeks. You giggled at him finding the streaks across his face amusing.

“You look funny Mikey..” You laughed.

“Oh fuck i thought i looked just 'fabulous’..” With that he dramatised the statement making you laugh even more.

“I don’t need this..” He pointed to the makeup skattered over the dresser top.

“But i know girls need this i wont stop you wearing it. But. I love you even more when i can see those cute little freckles of yours.” You couldn’t help but smile at him.

“And one other thing. Don’t you ever stop wearing these band tees…” He bit his lip cheekily.

“They really do it for me, cause i know whats under them..” Winking he caused you to bite your lip at him.

“I really love you sometimes Michael Clifford.”

“You know what? I kinda love you too Y/N Y/LN. A lottttt.. And that 'extra fi’t body of yours.”