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Percy ‘this shit wasn’t in the contract’ Jackson

Annabeth 'deadass fight me’ Chase

Grover 'my enCHILADAS’ Underwood

Jason 'fuck u and ur asshole ways’ Grace

Piper 'what do you mean I can’t do that’ McLean

Leo 'this is a bad time, I'ma make puns’ Valdez

Hazel 'didn’t come back to life for this’ Levesque

Frank 'lmao wait what’ Zhang

Reyna 'I could fukin kill you’ Ramirez-Arellano

Nico 'I have a doctors note’ Di Angelo

Will 'doctors orders’ Solace

Thalia 'what do you mean punk is dead’ Grace

Clarisse 'kys before I kill you’ La Rue

Travis 'u put the bombs on the wrong hill?’ Stoll

Connor 'don’t be an idiot’ Stoll

Meg 'it’s raining trash, hallelujah’ McCaffery

Apollo 'i cant believe zeus would ever’


Chiron: Well, they finally caught the thief.

Connor: Wow, they’re really going to ban him from Camp just for stealing pudding cups and toilet paper?

Chiron: No, he was caught taking rare weapons from the Big House.


Chiron: …Have you been stealing pudding cups and toilet paper?

Connor: What? No. I - I hate pudding and I don’t - I don’t use… toilet paper.


Connor: I have one of those French thingies that shoots water up your butt.

Chiron: Bidet?

Connor: Bidet to you too.