still quite funny though

The Greek gods were chill (and slightly petty)

The Egyptian gods were….interesting, for lack of a better word.

The Roman gods were strict

The Norse gods are just utter nincompoops

Opinion: I hate when a piece of media uses a freak show as a setting even if it’s not the whole setting

I hate the whole air of “oooo aren’t they thrilling because they’re different” and the quite often blatant ableism that goes unexamined bc it’s okay this was in the past were over that now and I hate the equation that goes “physical or mental difference=grotesque and scary,” bc it’s usually about the ~spookiness or the sense of alienation

it’s just so! exhausting! to deal with if you personally have any kind congenital disability bc media already reinforces the idea that being born ~different is bad and scary and typically anything that involves a freak show is almost certainly just gonna exaggerate that to even more extremes

like I ALREADY feel alienated by society for my disabilities I don’t need a reminder that it used to be even worse

Just a little short something here. Nothing fancy or that well thought out tbh, but either way — some 2P! America :)

“I once ran over a snail with my car when I was sixteen.” said Allen.

The content smile on your face slid away and you tilted the menu downwards to stare at him, incredulous.

He wasn’t staring at you. Instead his eyes were on the laminated menu spread open in front of him.

You eyed him, skeptically, trying to assess his intentions.

He appeared to be lost in his own mind though, not at all aware of the low chatter in the restaurant as he twisted in his seat, turning the pages (once, twice, thrice, then back again).

Allen was never that well at poker faces. Usually there was something giving him away — the small glitter of the tongue piercing peeking through the corner of his upturned lips; blunt nails crossing over his right brow in a slow twist; a cock of the head that almost resembled a cat ready to pounce — something.

Honestly, anything.

But he was calm. Absolutely calm and inattentive to his surroundings.

“You… ran over a snail on purpose?” you asked, slowly, considerate, wondering if perhaps you were simply hearing things and Allen really hadn’t just commented out of the blue about snails of all things.

As if he had been shocked alive, Allen’s eyes shot upwards, the murky copper — too dark to be brown, maybeit’s not red. It must be hazel, a mix of colours that just won’t stay still. Vibrant under light — of his eyes met your gaze.

He stared owlishly, as if not understanding what you were asking of him, and for a single beat you wondered if perhaps you were tired.

The last few weeks had been stressful, and the sudden boast of insomnia hitting in the nights (studying, always studying) days before the exams had also been taking a toll. It wouldn’t be quite a surprise if you’d begun to hit the point where you began to hear whispers, of friends and family, where they shouldn’t be.

You opened your mouth to brush off the comment when Allen suddenly made a sound in the back of his throat, more of bemused laughter than anything. “I was a really angsty teen and I wanted to know what death felt like under my tires!”

No.

He had.

“Don’t judge. Don’t judge.”

thedogthatkissesback  asked:

🔥 travis

If you mean travis mcelroy hes not quite as funny as justin and griffin (still funny though) but i like him as a person and hes talked about some personal stuff before that made me realize things about myself and i like him because of that

The Summer (12/30)

The Summer (12/30) | Dan Howell has spent the last three summers at Camp Bergamot, but it’s never been quite like this before. This year, he faces a summer full of new friends, a new relationship, and an entirely new view on his own sexuality. Perhaps Camp Bergamot should be renamed camp self discovery for all the changes Dan has gone through, but one thing’s for sure - despite all the hiccups and the drama, he just might have found the love of his life. | Phan | Mature | Smut, Misunderstandings, Insecurity, Panic Attacks, Bullying, Minor Violence, Physical Fight | 300,000+ Words

Disclaimer: In no way do I claim that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil.

This Part: 8,921 Words

For reference, @phansdick is Dan, @insanityplaysfics is Phil.

(Previous) (AO3) (Masterlist)

Warnings: masturbation, ruined orgasm, unresolved sexual tension, dirty talk, scary stories

Chapter Twelve

Keep reading

The Zodiac Signs: Expectations v.s Reality
  • Aries: always yelling and is always happy. Aggressive// Just wants a hug and is super fun to hang out with
  • Taurus: Pervert. Hungry all the time. Sexy & lazy// SuuUuUper chill and a very dependable friend
  • Gemini: Super talkative and friendly but secretly evil. Annoying and loud//Cutest things in the world! Funny and good at cracking jokes.
  • Cancer: Clingy cinnamon roll that is constantly on the verge of tears//actually annoyed with the world and just wants to curl up in their bed and sleep.
  • Leo: Beauty queen that's too self absorbed and wants attention//Super Chill and very fun to hang out with. Will beat up anyone who hurts you
  • Virgo: Smart alec that isn't to be messed with//Not-so-smart alec that's antisocial and just wants some peace and quiet.
  • Libra: Perfect little angel that couldn't hurt a fly// A hot mess. just like all of us. still friendly though.
  • Scorpio: Emo. hates everything //not emo. actually quite funny and a very loyal and kind/caring friend.
  • Sagittarius: loves everybody//Secretly hates everybody. Just wants to have the freedom to do what they want.
  • Capricorn: Smart & cool. Has the glasses, bowtie, suit, everything.// Shy and awkward. Just wants to be loved.
  • Aquarius: Alien.// A very funny and cute alien. Sarcastic and will stand up to bullies for you. Knows more than you think.
  • Pisces: Cute yet dumb little muffin that has no idea wtf is going on with their life. Push over// Actually quite intelligent. Still cute. Most likely to die with 1234567890 cats. Secretly an assassin, probably.
Exposure

A Min Yoongi/Suga Fanfiction

Summary:  Exposure determines how light or dark an image will appear when it’s been captured by a camera…So why can you only see rainbows when you look at him.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13  Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18

Part 18

Drawing patterns on his chest as you use your finger to follow the outline of Kumamon on his shirt should have made you sleepy and allowed you to fall asleep beside him. But the hyper awareness of where you were and the fact that you had never actually spent the night with Yoongi before this- minus what happened at the studio- made it hard for you to slip into slumber.

He’d fallen asleep a little over an hour ago, his body laid close to the back of the sofa and his arm curled around you, the duvet swaddling you both. But despite your inability to fall asleep, you couldn’t find it in yourself to wake him, simply peering up at him every now and again to take in the soft slopes and clear skin of his face, and the way his lips pouted the tiniest bit every time he breathed out.

When a lash of rain suddenly pelts against the window you get startled, jolting against him and worrying that you’d woken him once your heart had stopped crashing in your chest. However, when you look up at him to check he was still asleep, you find him blinking his eyes sleepily down at you, sporting the most beautiful double chin as he squints to try and see what you were doing.

‘Whats going on?’ he mumbles, struggling to keep his eyes open despite himself.

‘Nothing, I just got scared by the rain- go back to sleep.’ you murmur quietly, putting on a brave face to try and reassure him, but ending up breaking out in a chuckle as you watch him desperately trying to fend of sleep and failing miserably with the way he could barely lift his eyelids let alone his head.

'Did you manage to fall asleep yet?’ he mumbles, dragging in a deep breath to try and wake himself up a bit more, and you feel his arm tighten the tiniest bit on your waist as he shuffles to readjust himself into a slightly more elevated position.

‘Not really. The rain keeps waking me up.’ You mutter, ducking your head against his chest so that he couldn’t see the white lie shining out from your eyes, but feeling him touch your hair lightly in response, the realisation that it was his lips making your whole body tremble at the thought.

‘Do you want me to put the t.v. on to drown out the rain?’ he mutters, his body shifting as he speaks, and you look up to see him reaching for the remote on the table behind his head, not even waiting for your answer before clicking the power button.

‘YAH!’ 

He shouts in surprise when the screen turns on, both of your eyes blowing wide as you see a half-naked woman writhing around on a satin bed, the phone numbers and details surrounding the cameras identifying the show as the late night adult entertainment, but Yoongi’s already fumbling with the remote whilst you bury yourself under his arm in embarrassment before either of you realise.

You both lay in silence once he’s clicked the tv off, the awkwardness of the situation making you peer up at him with an amused smile on your face, and when you see him laid there with a stunned expression on his face, you both find yourself bursting into fits of giggles.

‘Yah! I didn’t mean to put that on.’ He tries to explain around his laughter, his embarrassment just making you laugh more as you try to suffocate your giggles into his chest, using his pyjama shirt to hide your face despite the fact you could still hear him laughing too. Although you both cut off into quick silence when you hear a shuffling noise come from one of the bedrooms, freezing against one another as you wait to see if anyone was going to come out.

‘I don’t think anyone’s coming.’ You murmur after a few minutes of waiting, turning your head to look up at Yoongi and grinning when you see that his cheeks were still mildly red, despite the smirk on his face.

‘That was quite funny though.’ You giggle, biting your lip to try and control yourself as you shuffle yourself up into a sort of kneeling position beside him on the sofa, sleep being forgotten as you watch him turn his head to groan into the pillow.

‘I cant believe that actually just happened.’ He mutters, the words muffled by the pillow, but you hear them all the same, chuckling at his embarrassment, and reaching forward to pet his head sympathetically (albeit partially sarcastically).

‘It could have been worse.’ You giggle, grinning at him once again as he turns his head to look at you, the move pushing his hair from his forehead and making you suck in a breath at how much of a difference the simple move made to him.

‘How exactly do you propose that it could have been worse?’ he asks with ironic amusement, raising his eyebrows expectantly, and you have to quickly snap yourself out of your staring to answer him, fumbling over your words.

‘Well…I mean, we could have been sat with everyone else…or we could have been doing stuff and it would have ruined the mood-‘

doing stuff’…what exactly do you mean by ‘doing stuff’?’ he asks, smirking as he shuffles into a sitting position in front of you, his gaze gleaming with excitement, and you feel adrenaline flood your veins as you scramble for an excuse, cursing yourself for rambling out the thoughts in your mind.

‘Well…I mean…uh, what if we were…-‘

‘Yes?’

Your nervousness dissipates a little as you see him smirking in amusement at your inability to speak, causing you to narrow your eyes at him, and shove his shoulder for teasing you. But you don’t expect him to grab your arm and pull you on top of him, his sudden action surprising you, and before you know it your nose is almost touching his and his eyes are twinkling up at you.

‘If you don’t want to tell me, why don’t you show me?’ he dares you, his hand sliding round your waist to the small of your back, and you feel goose bumps chase after it across your skin, your breath coming out faster as your heart begins to race excitedly, as well as nervously, at his suggestion.

‘Really?’ you whisper, slightly worried that he was just trying to tease you, but getting the thought knocked from you when he quickly stretches his neck up to touch his lips to yours, lingering with intent and surprising you by gently tugging on your bottom lip with his teeth, before slowly pulling back.

‘Really.’

You cant help yourself then. As soon as the word leaves his mouth all the pent up energy in you that had been lingering since the moment you’d woken up that morning and remembered the night before explodes within you, and you’re grabbing his head to force his lips to yours, moaning as soon as you taste the toothpaste induced minty-ness of him. When you feel his hand slide to your butt and give it a firm squeeze, you cant help but roll your hips down into his, making him huff needily into your mouth as you claw him closer to you, knotting your fingers in his hair and attempting to tangle your tongue with his as your hips proceed to take on a mind of their own.

‘Jagi-‘ he pants, his lips struggling to pull away from your own to release the word, but you’re too caught up in your actions to pay much attention to him, instead moving your mouth to suck on the flawless skin of his neck, having wanted to do it since the first time you’d kissed him, and groaning in satisfaction when he tastes and feels exactly like you knew he would. You can feel his hands pushing their way under your shirt, his fingers kneading over your skin and creating tingles that skitter over your skin to rest between your legs, one of his hands unconsciously following them as he smoothes over your ass and lets his nimble fingertips ghost between your legs from behind.

You have one hand locked in his hair and one dipped under the hem of his tshirt as you continue to roll your hips into his with his actions, having become more enthusiastic in your movements when you’d felt him grow harder against your pantie-clad core, having only gone to sleep in your panties and a shirt that Yoongi had leant to you.

‘Jagi, careful-‘ he gasps when he feels you nip at his neck, and so you quickly move to connect your lips back with his, removing your hand from his soft stomach intending on bracing it on the sofa beside his head, but before you could stop yourself you’d leant on the remote and the television springs to life once again, but this time instead of silence, grunts and groans fill the room.

‘Shit!’

You both begin to scramble for the remote, getting tangled in a pile of limbs as you fall to the floor in pursuit of the small device. But before you even manage to grab it, you hear a door slam and footsteps approach from down the hall, with Jin coming into view before you have chance to do anything.

‘Guys, can you please keep it down- holymotherofgod, WHAT ARE YOU WATCHING!’

(T.B.C)

anonymous asked:

I don't like this, but for me it seems like rather solid ground to end BG without HL speculations going wild. Especially if you read the last line. mtv(.)co(.)uk/zayn-malik/news/zayn-malik-comes-clean-about-louis-tomlinson-and-harry-styles-relationship

So this one was published today (just for the record, because it seemed like the first wave of these articles already passe by now to me, i don’t know), and you might be right. Yeah.

Zayn Malik comes clean about Louis Tomlinson and Harry Styles’ relationship

It’s been a month of ups and downs for Directioners. First, their tear-stained final OTRA show in Sheffield, then Zayn Malik’s candid interview with Fader. In addition to his mesmerizing motorbike photos, Zayn is ready to lift the lid on what’s really going on between Louis Tomlinson and Harry Styles

But die-hard Larry shippers will be disappointed to hear that the rumours may be nothing but hot air.

‘There’s no secret relationships going on with any of the band members,’ the 22-year-old told Fader.

‘It’s not funny, and it still continues to be quite hard for them.’

Though he doesn’t mention Louis and Harry by name, Zayn went on to make some pretty sweeping statements about the band.

‘They won’t naturally go put their arm around each other because they’re conscious of this thing that’s going on, which is not even true,’ says Zayn.

‘They won’t do that natural behaviour.’

But Zayn is quick to reassure fans that their dedication is appreciated.

‘It’s just the way the fans are,’ he says. ‘They’re so passionate, and once they get their head around an idea, that’s the way it is regardless of anything.

‘If it wasn’t for that passionate, like, almost obsession, then we wouldn’t have the success that we had.’

But you know what they say, don’t trust anything unless you get it straight from the horses mouth. Come on Larry, let us know!

Quite funny that Naruhina fans are still impatiently waiting for more.

Even though they are canon, married, have children, got their own movie, kissed, fluffy and romantic moments.

It’s like it’s never enough to repay the 15 years of painful waiting.

WE STILL WANT MOAR!!!!

Emma grins as she walks into Regina’s office holding a gift bag behind her back. She waits for Regina to notice her, the brunette finally lifting her head from the mountain of paperwork surrounding her to smile and say, “Hi Emma.” 

God Emma loves hearing her name tumble from Regina’s lips. There’s just a way that Regina says it that makes her heart flip. “Hi,” she says before holding out the gift bag, “I got you something…well technically my Mom did.” 

Regina frowns worriedly, “Is this another of her “yes I am supportive of my daughter’s relationship with Regina” gifts?” 

Emma nods, “Probably. Just think, it can’t be worse than the last one though I still think that was quite funny.” 

“She sent a barbershop quartet to the office so they could sing to me that it was okay to love you,” Regina points out. 

“It’s her way of being supportive,” Emma replies, “I mean it’s a little over the top but at least she’s not running after us shooting arrows.” 

“Good point,” Regina concedes before opening the gift bag and then quickly closing it, “Have you seen this present?” 

“It can’t be that bad,” Emma tries. Then Regina pulls it out…a Christmas sweater. 

Both of their faces pale at the realisation. 

“Oh no…..not again…..” Emma whispers. 

Regina nods with a dramatic frown as she replies, “I think she’s planning another family Christmas photo.”