still not a fan of that skirt

Batfam Embarrassing Moments at Galas


Let’s out a loud cackle in the middle of a speech praising the work of earths Green Lantern(Hal Jordan). The crowd all turns to see Bruce Wayne laughing his fool head off at the prospect of Hal, the guy who regularly runs into buildings and hums the theme song to Star Wars in the middle of battles, being given such credit.


This was when he was still a teen… he accidentally burped really loud and let out an “oh fuck I’m sorry” right in front the mayor of Gotham. The look Bruce sent him could have turned him to stone.


Popped five hot chili peppers in his mouth. He then preceded to yell my mouth is on fire, fan his watering eyes, and stumble to the drink table to chug an entire jug of water.


Tripped, grabbed the first thing nearest to him, which was a ladies skirt, and tore the dress down the back as he fell to the floor.


Was caught, by Dick, staring at a woman’s butt in a tight dress.


Gagged on an orderve and choked up the entire thing, which landed with a loud slop on the floor.


At one of the Wayne banquets, Bruce asked his kids to join him on stage. She fell asleep durn the speech and tipped against Damian, who let her fall to the floor. The crowd went silent, a look of utter exhaustion flashed across Bruce’s face, and he turned to see his kids beginning a silent argument of glaring at each other(Robin was spotted falling off a building later that night).


Got drunk. Stumbled around mumbling “Howdy, sexy lady” to everyone.


Non. He’s British perfection.

Leather Jacket

Note: I had this in my drafts for a while, then Sebastian decides to grace us with his leather jacket?? fucc me. I don’t even write about the leather jacket - it’s a slight mention, lawl. oh and since I’m sick, I don’t feel up to finishing requests. hopefully this ties you guys over! not really sure what it is, just go along with it. gif credit to owner! feedback is always welcome, I love reading your comments!! .c


The heavy sound of boots with chains hanging from the shoelace loops caught your attention behind you. Your ears perked as you listened closely. Great. He’s here. You rolled your eyes and clenched your jaw as the sound got closer.

Bucky Barnes was a regular in the local library, just like you were. He was cocky, he rode a black motorcycle, he was way too flirty, and he got on your nerves. He didn’t waste a single second to piss you off and make you equally as flustered at the same time. You hated him. Also, you liked him. You’d never admit that there was any sexual tension between you two. The last thing that man needs is a bigger head. No, not that one. But if you could feel that tension, you knew he could.

“Pornographic books again, Doll?” His breath fanned across your cheek as he leaned down, his arms either side of you, his large hands resting on the table. You scoffed and ignored the shiver that ran down your spine when he not-so-subtly sniffed your hair. 

“A friend recommended this one, Barnes. Now get away, you smell like burnt rubber.” You nudged your elbow against his chest and he chuckled, moving to sit across from you at the table.

Taking off his leather jacket and setting it on the table, he slumped back in his seat, trailing his hand through his hair as he grinned at you.

“Is that so? They wanna get you all hot and bothered with a book? I can do that with my words.” He challenged, his blue eyes boring right into yours. You inhaled deeply - not missing the way his eyes fell to your cleavage in your low-cut top as it rose with your air intake - and ignored him.

Your eyes fell back onto your book that rest on the table. It was silent for a few moments and you actually got lost in the fantasy, subconsciously biting your bottom lip. Your thighs squeezed together and you let your tongue slowly lick your bottom lip before turning the page.

This caught Bucky’s attention. He watched as your eyes skimmed across the pages, the way you slightly squirmed in your seat. Bucky leaned forward and rest his elbows on the table as he smirked at you.

“You’re wet.” Bucky stated lowly, his eyes focused on your lips. Your head shot up and your mouth was agape. Bucky bit his lip this time, seeing as you made the perfect ‘o’ shape. His mind raced with thoughts of what your mouth would feel like against his, and full of his-

“What are you even doing here? Go bother someone else!” You slammed your book closed and sighed heavily, bringing him out of his thoughts. A loud shush came from the little old lady that came around a bookshelf. You gave her an apologetic smile before she rolled her eyes and left the space.

Bucky chuckled and leaned back in his chair again, linking his fingers behind his head. His biceps looked as if they were ready to rip through the material of his shirt. And fuck, if that didn’t do things to you. “Come on, you know I love teasing you, Doll.” He licked his lips and you cursed yourself for feeling your panties get even more wet at the sight of his tongue.

You felt blood rush to your face and you creased your eyebrows. Okay, it’s time he gets a taste of his own medicine. You crossed your arms to purposefully push your breasts together. Bucky’s biceps flexed as his eyes took in the sight of your cleavage once again. That got a reaction you were hoping for.

“Instead of teasing me all the time, why don’t you do something about it?” You countered innocently, tilting your head slightly. You lifted your foot underneath the table and trailed it up along the inside of Bucky’s leg. He let out a harsh breath, letting his eyes travel up to your face. His throat bobbed as he swallowed thickly.

You bit your lip again and raised your eyebrows, looking at him with such innocence, he felt his jeans tighten completely. He sat there completely still and utterly shocked. You let your foot drop back down. Got him

Seeing as he wasn’t going to respond anymore, you picked your book up again, only now you held it up in front of your face and continued to read. If you weren’t in the library right now, you would laugh so hard you’d be crying. The reaction on Bucky’s face was award winning.

After finishing another paragraph, it was finally quiet again. So quiet, that you couldn’t hear Bucky’s heavy breathing anymore. You were able to finish a whole page without any interruptions from him. You were lucky to get through that much before. 

You slowly brought your book down from your face and looked at the empty seat in front of you. Bucky wasn’t there, but his leather jacket was still on the table where he left it.

You turned your head, looking all around you and didn’t spot Bucky anywhere, or rather anyone. Your eyebrows creased with confusion as you looked at his empty seat again. He was just here and you didn’t even hear him leave or see him get up. Where did he even go?

Suddenly, you felt something stubbly - much like a face - sliding in between your legs, slowly moving closer to your soaking panties. A gasp fell from your lips as you felt two hands rest on the outsides of your thighs, gently pulling them apart.

Your chest rose and fell quickly as his fingers dug into your flesh. You knew it was Bucky just by the feel of him smirking and his long hair tickling your skin. His warm breath fanned out across your clothed pussy, and you immediately regretted wearing a skirt today. Actually, you regretted waking up and coming to the library today.

Bucky’s tongue licked a stripe up your panties and you felt his warm breath huff out against you. There’s no fucking way he’s doing this right now. His hands made their way towards the hem of your panties and he slid them down to your ankles, trailing his lips down your inner thigh. He sat still and you knew he was resting a moment to take in the sight of you, spread out and wet.

Your eyes shut as you felt him slide his face between your thighs again. You swallowed harshly and felt his tongue lick another stripe up your pussy, circling around your clit. A moan almost made its way out of your mouth but you bit down on your lip.

Bucky’s mouth closed around your clit and he started to suck, using his tongue to lightly nudge against it. Your hand shot down to grip onto his hair, your fingers tangling into his long locks. This seemed to get him going; he groaned against you, but stopped once he remembered he had to stay quiet.

Your thighs shook around Bucky’s head and you inhaled deeply when you felt his finger circling around your entrance. He gently slid his finger inside of you, curling perfectly to hit your g-spot. A soft whimper fell from your lips and he smirked against you. He shook his head back and forth and pulled you closer with his left hand.

You slapped your other hand over your mouth as felt yourself getting closer to your orgasm. Bucky inserted a second finger, speedily sliding his fingers in and out of your tight, wet pussy. You tugged on his hair harshly as your eyes momentarily rolled into the back of your head and he pulled his mouth away, planting a kiss to your thigh before attaching his mouth to you again.

His tongue was long and felt so amazing, you were nearly in tears from holding in your moans. Bucky’s fingers nudged your g-spot one last time before you became a quivering mess in your chair. He kept going, pleasuring you through your orgasm as you came on his face.

Your eyes were hooded and your mouth was slightly open but nothing came out as you finished, your hips jerking a little as Bucky licked you clean. You slumped in your chair, breathing heavily, and felt him pull your panties back up. His lips planted a kiss to your clothed, sensitive clit before you felt him move away from you.

Bucky appeared out from under the table with a proud smirk, disheveled hair, and red cheeks. Then he smiled - an actual genuine smile - as he took in your wrecked appearance. He made a show of wiping his chin and sucking his finger and you sat up, feeling your thighs shake a little.

You cleared your throat, avoiding his playful stare. “What-what was that?” You whispered, bravely looking up at Bucky now. He licked his lips and chuckled deeply, running his hand through his hair again.

“I did something about it.”

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pretty easy being a pirate when one half of you is a trained sword fighter, and the other half has absolute control of the ocean

been discussing this idea with @lapisofficial and i finally decided to draw this beautiful fusion!! :)

{and yes this IS my final design for moonstone}

jon snow: hands

anon requested: hit me with that against-the-wall, i-almost-lost-you jon snow smut?

notes: smut, smutty, s m u t. i tried to, so enjoy like 1,400 words of smut not counting the cut above. enjoy!!! bc i really did omg

Jon lifted you up off you feet as you appeared before him. His arms wrapped around your shoulders, as he gasped.

You were here, he thought, she’s here.

You laughed as he kissed your cheeks, “I thought you were gone,”

You raise your brow at him, patting his stubbly cheeks. “Jon, I told you I was going home for awhile.”

“No, you didn’t.”

“Yes, I did,” you said as you tiptoed to kiss him passionately on the lips.

“I thought I almost lost you,” he continued as he broke away. He placed your hand on his chest, kissing your inner wrist.

“You overreact sometimes, wolf,” you giggled as you placed you down. You reached up to kiss his jaw, and he kissed your forehead.

He reached down to nibble down at your ear as he whispered, “Let me show you how much I’ve missed you.” He cocked his head to the side with a subtle wink and you tighten your hand around his own as he walked up the stairs with you to his room.

When he closed the door, you leaned knowingly against the wall, feeling his eyes move to your hands as you untied your coat at the tips. He took in a breathe as the coat was disregarded at the bottom, and walked over to you, his hands on both sides of your neck, “Dirty,” he whispered as you stood before him in a low cut top, showing him generously your chest.

And he began. And you did, too.

Keep reading

Devoid Of Color - Smut

Originally posted by multihxe

Author: @dumbass-stilinski
Rating: NSFW 18+
Pairing: Dylan O’Brien/Reader
Words: 4,170
AN: This was an anon request for a Soulmate AU where you didn’t see colors until you met your soulmate. I hope I did this justice because Soulmate AU’s are my FAVORITE. Love ya’ll, let me know what you think!

Title taken from Halsey’s Colors. The Veselka and Space Billiards are real places in NYC. You’re welcome.

If there was anything you wanted more in life, it was to meet your soulmate. As strange as it sounds, meeting your soulmate was a top priority in everyone’s life, because you needed to meet them in order to see color. The world was just a drab mixture of blacks and greys before that. Your mother had explained it to you once when you were small, that color would wash over your vision slowly, dull and drab, but still there. It was only when you got to know them more that the colors would become brighter, streaks of red and blue and yellow lighting up the world in full HD.

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Pairing: Kang Daniel/reader (third person)

Word Count: 2071

Rating: 18+ for sexual content

Summary: A continuation of the first part: x

A/N: sorry for leaving y’all hanging for a bit, i’ve been wayyy busy. The ending’s kinda awkward and cliffhanger-y even though there’ll be no continuation. It’s also kinda short bc ya girl is bad at writing pussy eating

Keep reading

Steven Universe Comic #2 (2017) - Outline & Review

The Steven Universe franchise’s ongoing series smashed boundaries with #2. This second issue of 2017 focuses on Stevonnie going to a dance with Kiki!

This issue was easily the best I’ve read in the comics. The paper issue I own has the cover by Missy Peña!


Steven and Connie are dismayed to find that the movie they want to see is PG-13, so they can’t get in without an adult.

They attempt to get around the rules by fusing into Stevonnie, but are still unable to produce appropriate ID.

So they leave disappointed and end up running into Kiki, who’s supposed to be shopping for prom dresses. Stevonnie gets very caught up in the enthusiasm of trying on outfits.

They end up getting invited to be Kiki’s date to the dance.

Steven and Connie are excited about planning the event, but when Stevonnie and Kiki end up in situations that feel pretty heavily coded romantic, they start to panic a little, unsure of their role and how they feel about being with Kiki.

Especially considering she doesn’t appear to know they are two younger children fused together. 

Steven and Connie must talk out the best solution to be kind to Kiki while also not betraying their own interests, and Stevonnie is able to find a solution everyone likes.

Notable bits for fans:

1. The movie the kids see is Unfamiliar Familiar, and you can definitely see how upset Connie is that they’ve destroyed one of her favorite franchises by shoehorning the romance in right from the beginning.

2. The movie clerk is still Jane.

3. Stevonnie does not know how old they are.

4. It’s canon now that Stevonnie is really excited about clothes. (And they are happy to try on dresses, suits, and any kind of clothing that’s around.)

Later, when they go on a date, Kiki and Stevonnie are both wearing corsages, and Stevonnie’s clothes are a sort of skirt-suit mixture.

(When they unfuse, Steven is wearing the dress and Connie is wearing the suit.)

This is also the first time Stevonnie has worn shoes in canon material.

5. Despite that Stevonnie’s gender is a bit indeterminate, they seem to be fine going into dressing rooms and bathrooms that are mysteriously not marked for any gender. It’s possible these spaces aren’t gendered in the SU world, even though clothing options seem pretty traditional. Stevonnie is shown in the same changing room with Kiki while they’re trying on outfits, and later Steven and Connie are hiding in the same restroom.

6. Kiki blushes subtly on several occasions while interacting with Stevonnie, suggesting that she is susceptible to Stevonnie’s charisma. They really seem to charm everyone.

7. After researching dances by watching teen movies, Steven and Connie are prepared for the dance, but Connie says she’s not allowed to be out after dark without a chaperone and they employ Pearl to provide this service. Pearl also wears her tux, which is implied to be the one she acquired in the episode “Mr. Greg.”

8. When Stevonnie and Kiki have a snack at the Big Donut before the dance (with Pearl), Lars and Sadie are seen pressing their faces against the window entranced by what’s going on.

9. While introducing Stevonnie to her friends, Kiki specifically uses the “they” pronoun. They’re really knocking it out of the park with the appropriate pronouns in this comic series.

10. Steven and Connie’s discussion of how to go forward in their lives when they’re fused is really fascinating–and has many parallels to people who live with unusual variations, including queer genders and orientations. Connie’s “Do we have to start telling everyone right from the beginning?!” comment is particularly relevant.

It’s impractical to blurt it in an introduction that you’re secretly two kids fused together, but it’s also difficult to get to know someone as an individual without disclosing something so important. When’s the right time to tell people? So many people will relate to this.

And they’re pretty worried about what Kiki will think of them, but Connie makes a good point about how THEIR feelings about the situation are relevant too.

Their conclusion that Stevonnie and Kiki should be friends, not seeing each other in a romantic context, was pretty satisfying.

This is again another casually queer comic with very accurate presentation of the characters acting like they do in the show. Recommended for fans of the show, as always.        

[SU Book and Comic Reviews]

Chanyeol’s Tongue

Rating: Mature

Word Count: 3277

Pairing: Chanyeol x Reader

Warning: explicit language; dirty talk; daddy kink; cunnilingus

Summary: Chanyeol does a lot for his fans. He knows that they love when he does little acts of fanservice. But his fanservice isn’t reserved just for his fans. Sometimes it’s for a special person he wants to impress the most.

There is nothing you want more desperately than to whack Chanyeol right upside his head. He’s not narcissistic to where he can’t think about anyone but himself. But he basks in the adoration of his fans. There were little things he discovered four years after debuting that makes the girls go crazy. His new discovery is that women love seeing him “casually” licks his lips or “randomly” stick his tongue completely out of his mouth.

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Apparently Belle’s dress in the remake is still bothering me, because yesterday I was compelled to get out my watercolors and make my own version of how I would have done it. We still have the floaty layers of fabric to make the dress move beautifully, but now there’s more drapery to make the skirt more familiar to the original. Also, the original sleeves are back since I still cannot fathom why they got rid of them in the first place.

I used a very different technique than I usually do with my watercolors - with this one, it was watercolors first and then draw the details, which was quite an interesting outcome and explains why the color is outside the lines. However, I quite like it!  

— the crimson killer (M)

Genre: Smut ➝ Vampire AU

Pairing: Jung Hoseok x Kim Taehyung x Reader.

Plot: This is the era of The Crimson Killers.

Warnings: Graphic depictions of blood and gore, character death, sexual content, Daddy kinks, queefing.

Notes: This story is set and written in 1950′s America, but the language is, in my head, spoken in English. But, of course, that is up to your own interpretation. Welcome to the Merlot Murders series and introducing: The Crimson Killers.

♡ I want to thank @bunnyart-blog for the insanely beautiful artwork inspired by this story. I love it so much and I feel awful for never promoting this on my blog. Thank you so much!

The swinging tune of The Coasters sang out into the streets of the city as he made his next move, boots crunching on the gravel and his lips puckered to a whistle, singing the tune back into his ears. It had been a long, long time since he’d come back to this place, and hell he wasn’t planning on returning any sooner than he just had.

He had things to do, places to be, things to eat. The life of an immortal gives you these chances and possibilities that the mortal cannot have; superhuman speed, the power of reading someone else’s mind, sharp fangs that could tear the throat of another being who stood in his path. All these nightmares came in the package of being a vampire, and Taehyung had just come to accept it.

“Smile more,” his friend said from beside him. “You look like you want to kill someone.”

“Funny you should say that,” Taehyung mocked, “but you know, I’m a vampire, and killing people is kind of part of the package.”

Hoseok nodded once, understanding. “Right. You’re not as old as me, the youth has yet to learn.”

“The youth,” Taehyung replied, “is learning. I’m just hungry.”

“Well,” Hoseok began, swinging an arm around his old, old friend’s shoulders, “that’s why you’re comin’ with me. You’re lucky I even got you the job- you’re gonna get free food, good money and the love from the waitresses.”

Taehyung sighed, following his friend as they walked into the driveway of the large diner, swerving in and out of pastel coloured cars parked in a messy fashion in the parking lot.

“That’s not going to help me,” he explained. “Human food just grosses me out sometimes. I mean, all that grease. It’s not my style.”

“I know,” Hoseok commented with a grin. “Pretty girlies with skirts are your style. But don’t worry- Maria works here and she tastes divine.”

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Sf9 When You(an idol) are shipped with them. (Your Bff’s)

Inseong: will giggle and grin or smirk to himself whenever a fan mentions you, thinks you two would make a cute couple himself and occasionally brings it up as a joke like “we should date since we are shipped so much.” 

 Youngbin: The more you two are shipped, the more he will gradually start seeing you as a woman and develop a crush. One day will be like “I don’t mind being shipped together just so you know.”

Jaeyoon: “Her? She’s my ugly raccoon.” But the more you two are shipped, he will start to look at you differently. “Did she get prettier? The raccoon doesn’t look so bad today.”

Rowoon: Will play along and flirt with u just for the ship and fanservice but as soon as you play along as well and hold his hands, his heart will race and start crushing on you. Thinks about it for several sleepless nights. One day will be like “Lets back hug next time what do u think?” 

 Zuho: Literally freaks df out “NO WAY! She’s not my type!!” But the more you two are shipped, he might start subconsciously eyeing u like hawk when other guys are around, and get more shy around u when u look extra pretty etc., but still try to deny his feelings while teasing u and nagging even further. “That skirt is so small, all the boys are looking!“ 

 Dawon: Lowkey smirks and like it so much, more than he should. Acts like a boyfriend yelling your name playfully across the music stage and cheering for u in front of fans and telling everyone on tv that your his girlfriend. 

Hwiyoung: Shy shy shy shy baby. “ah~no~.” Whenever someone mentions you, he goes shy. Doesnt mind how everyone thinks you two should date, but doesnt really say anything really to make his feelings clear. However when you two are together, he will be more manly and protective. 

Taeyang: Likes you for a while now before the ship but now has a reason to flirt with u even more in public even tho u punch him every single time he hugs u. You get annoyed playfully but somehow isn’t suprised because he’s so greasy and thinks its just for show until one day he actually asks u out on a date and ull be like oh shit ur really serious.

 Chani: Literally avoids whenever anyone talks about it or awkwardly gets shooked and replies with a small smile whenever someone mentions your name. Doesn’t want to make the friendship awkward unless he sees you make a move first.

softecat  asked:

idk if youre still doing this but what about best boy Mista?

Y’know what? I’m gonna roast the entirety of Buccellati’s gang.

First off, we have Giorno “Piss Drinker” Giovanna, the son of Dio Brando. Much like his father, Giorno has a questionable taste in fashion. Where did Giorno get a vest with ladybug nipples? Why does said vest have a boob window? Why does his hair have donuts in it? So many questions, but all I know is that he once stole Koichi’s luggage like a BASTARD. What the hell is your issue, Giorno?

(Not that Dio’s other children are better. Donatello looks like a tennis ball, Rikiel looks like a half-built cow cosplay (or Bruno’s brother), and Ungalo is Ungalo.)

Right after Giorno is fashion disaster Pannacotta Fugo. Holy crap would be the best term to describe whatever he’s wearing. You know how Kanye West advertises clothing with holes in them? I bet you $100 bucks that Fugo had some involvement in making it. And who the hell wears a tie UNDERNEATH their suit? Fuck Fugo, fuck his stupid hole suit, and fuck that one variant where he looks like a swiss cheese gijinka;

You wanna know the real reason why Fugo disappeared in Vento Aureo? Because everybody in Passione laughed at his stupid suit.

After Fugo comes everybody’s favorite four-hating weirdo, Guido Mista. What an appropriate first name, huh? I will give Mista some credit, though - getting rid of those sandals was a good move. He should have gotten rid of the rest of his suit, especially the helmet he wears. Is that a blue arrow on it, or is it a dick? And what kind of shirt is he wearing? A sweater crop-top? Do those even exist?

(Update: They do. Hm. Well, I guess I can roast his pants. Is he trying to pull a Dio and wear reverse-assless chaps?)

Narancia Ghirga has got the chin to end all chins. This orange boy loves Hey Arnold so much that he’s even got the shirt-skirt thing that Arnold has. Unfortunately, Narancia forgot that Arnold wears a red shirt, not an orange one. And what’s up with his shoes? Did he wrap up some onion rings with string? It’d be reasonable, coming from a man who got 28 from multiplying 16 and 55.

Up next is Leone Abbacchio, known by many as “Linkin Park’s biggest fan”. This dude’s hair is so spiky, I think he bleached an octopus and put its tentacles on his head. His suit itself is alright when compared to everyone else’s clothes, but it still looks wrong. It’s like if CD-i Link became the third member of Twenty One Pilots. The only difference is that CD-i Link would make TOP’s music good, while Leone wouldn’t change anything about it.

I wonder what would happen if Leone, Foo Fighters, and Rohan combined their egg-shells. Would Jouta pop out of the egg? I hope not.

Last, but not least, is the leader of the gang, Bruno “Zipper Fetishist” Buccellati. This coconut-head motherfucker has the second-tackiest suit in the entirety of his gang, right after Cheesy Fugo himself. What are those black things covering Buccellati’s suit? Sperm? Spoons? Stop signs? I know what needs to stop, and it’s Buccellati wearing that abomination of a suit.

Hiyori’s Invasion of Personal Thoughts

Summary: While fighting a phantom alongside Yato and Yukine, Hiyori accidentally manages to enter their hallucinations that reveal their greatest desires, some of which that catch her off guard.

Hiyori ducked at the last second, and then jumped out of the way.

The phantom wasn’t as big as some of the others that she’d fought, but it was quick with large claws, a scorpion tail, and beady black eyes. In the short time that she had been assisting Yato in his endeavors, Hiyori had quickly learned that even the less threatening phantoms were still deadly in one way or another.

Landing on her feet smoothly, Hiyori poised herself for the next incoming attack when Yato shoved her to the side, narrowly missing the creature’s tail that would have punctured both of them. “Hiyori,” Yato barked, jumping in front of her, “what did I tell you about the tail?”

“I wasn’t about to get stung,” she replied hotly. Taking a running start, she used a low balcony as a step stone and launched herself back at the phantom. Her foot smashed into the creature’s eye and it reared back in anguish.

Yato took the opening in the phantom’s blindspot to slash at its sides with Yukine. He managed to get a few swipes in before the monster adjusted to its new disability. “Bastard,” Yato spat as he limboed beneath one of the claws reaching out to get him.

Hiyori leapt at the claw, effectively using her body weight to snap it shut before it could close around her friend’s body. “Move it,” she panted, hurriedly looping his arm with her own. Yato pushed himself up off the ground and then the two of them were sprinting down the road in an attempt to find a battleground that would give them an advantage.

“Holding up?” Yato laughed through the strain in his voice.

Hiyori rolled her eyes despite the mild stitch in her side. “No more or less than normal.”

“Get ready,” he warned, slowing to a stop in the middle of the sidewalk. “It’s coming and it’s angry now.”

“Must not have liked me stepping on it’s face very much.”

“Probably didn’t like Yukine stabbing at him much either.”

“Hey,” Yukine exclaimed, his face appearing in the metal of the sword. “I can hear you talking about me.”

Yato smiled cheekily at his shinki. “Oh good! I thought you were ignoring me, you were so quiet!”

For a moment, the night seemed silent and calm; the dark aura of the phantom had seemed to disappear when the hair on the back of her neck standing up alerted Hiyori that it had finally caught up. “Yato!”

“I know,” he said. His blue eyes were narrowed and glowing. With Yukine glimmering threateningly in either hand, Yato had suddenly become much more terrifying. “It’s back.”

Hiyori made a three-hundred-sixty degree turn as she scanned the sky for the phantom. “I don’t see it,” she murmured, “but I can sense it.”

“Mhmm,” Yato grumbled. “Hiyori, stand back,” he said, using the sword in his right hand to direct which direction she should flee.

It was in that moment of Yato lowering his guard slightly that the beast surged forward. Hiyori screamed to warn them, but she was much to slow in comparison to the lightening quick phantom. In seconds it had covered fifty feet and was towering over Yato.

“Ah geez.” Yato’s back was to the creature. The phantom hissed, the pincers on its face vibrating violently. Yato barely saved himself from being nipped, but the same moment that he slashed at the phantom’s mouth, the scorpion-like tail whipped around and pierced him in the stomach.

“Yato!” Hiyori heard Yukine chorus with her as Yato’s body convulsed on the ground.

The shinki reverted to his human form and even from the distance Hiyori saw the tears rolling down Yukine’s face. “You bastard!” he screamed at the monster.

Hiyori saw the the tail moving before Yukine did, and she broke out in a run for the two boys. She had to get them out of there. If she could somehow take out the phantom, then get Yato back to Kofuku, she was sure that he could be saved.

Yukine attempted a borderline to drive off the scorpion phantom, but his attempt was weak from his fear and the scorpion tail broke through the defense and nicked the small boy in the cheek with the tip of it’s stinger. Yukine’s face contorted in pain and he screamed as his body fell on top of Yato’s.

Hiyori skidded to a semi-halt as tears flooded her eyes and her legs trembled violently. She wasn’t fast enough? Did she just witness her friends die?

The phantom turned in her direction, giving Hiyori the grounding she needed. Anger poured into her veins. Salt infiltrated her mouth and nose. Her chest burned. With a burst of new energy, Hiyori charged the phantom at full speed. Yato warned her on a regular basis not to go full power against phantoms because if her tail were to be severed then she would die, but at this point she was too clouded by loathing to think straight.

She aimed her kick for the phantom’s only functioning eye, but the beast anticipated her movements and swiped at her with a claw. Hiyori twisted her legs into a split, but the claw managed to graze her thigh, leaving a mark that resembled a mild burn.

She hissed as she alighted on her feet; her leg felt like it was on fire!

To her left was Yato and Yukine; they were pale in the face and shivering to the point that they they were sweating, but they were both alive.

“I’ll get you out of here,” she shouted at their unconscious bodies. “I promise!”

Hiyori whirled around to face the phantom again only to be met with two beady eyes. She left herself vulnerable.

And just like that, a scorpion tail plunged itself into her heart.

The first thing that Hiyori noticed when her eyes fluttered open was that she was not in her own bed.

The blankets were red and plush, much nicer than anything she would ever be able to own. The sheets were silk and the pillows were the softest down she had ever touched. A gold canopy fluttered above her, giving off a royal shine.

The second thing that she noticed was that the burn on her leg was gone and that there wasn’t any pain where the scorpion had stung her. For a moment Hiyori wondered if she was just in the midst of some elaborate dream, but she clearly remembered how real it was when she was fighting the phantom, the pain that had seared up her leg.

Was that what it felt like to be blighted?

Keep reading


Ok, so I bought this skirt off eBay on a hunch because it was pretty cheap and looked good in the product photos, but now that I got it, I’m not so sure any more. I might still be able to find something that goes with it or modify it or something, but as it is now, not a big fan. 😕


Pairings: Bucky / Reader

Warnings: Memory Loss and Fluff maybe the tiniest bit of Angst

Request: @georgiagrl1990 movie night with Bucky? 

AN: A nice bit of fluff goodness with Bucky and Reader. Request for the ever so beautiful @georgiagrl1990

Go ahead a check out my masterlist over here… MASTERLIST 

And please add yourself to my taglist…. HERE 

@just4muggles @morganlb23 @yet-another-lockup @theraputicwritings @unevenpages @littlepartofheaven @itsbubbaog @this-is-bucky-barnes @cassandras-musings @callmebucky-doll @frostbyte-horan @queendarkmuffin @justsomeboringperson

Tuesday was your favourite day of the week. You knew this was an unorthodox opinion and probably wasn’t shared by many people. If you’d picked Friday of course this would have been easy to explain, Saturday as well for completely obvious reasons. Tuesday though, beginning of the week so people were still recovering from the weekend and not fair enough into the week for people to have started looking forward to the weekend.

You were an epic Tuesday fan though, you always left your office in the evening with an extra skip in your step. Happily going to the grocery shop to stock up on mint choc chip ice cream, bags of Doritos and a 6 pack of beer.

You’d go back to your apartment, dump the groceries and kick out of the heels you wore in the office. Changing your skirt and blouse for the comfortable yoga pants and oversized t-shirts you wore at home.

You got home usually at about 7:30pm the knock on your door came roughly the same time every Tuesday evening at about 8:15pm. This was the reason for why Tuesday’s were so wonderful for you.

When you opened the door Bucky was stood there, hoody pulled up over his head shadowing his face and regulatory gloves covering his metal armed hand.

Every single Tuesday if Bucky was in New York and not on mission he would come to your apartment. The both of you would turned off your phones so no one could get in touch with you. You had a landline if it was an emergency. Then you would curl up on your sofa with nothing but junk food and watch movies until early in the morning.

It was quite regularly that you would wake up in the morning having fallen asleep on top of Bucky on the sofa. You never slept better than you did on a Tuesday evening on top of him, listening to the steady thump of his heart and feeling safe and protected wrapped in his arms.

“Hey doll” Bucky leant forwards and gently kissed your cheek, he stripped of the hoody as you closed the door behind him coming up to rest against his back, pressing your face into the space between his shoulders. “You alright?”

“I missed you”

He loosened the grip you had around his chest to turn around so he could face you, bringing his hands up to cup your face. He’d taken the gloves off as well, comfortable enough around you to not care about his metal prosthetic. “I’m here now”

Smiling you gripped his hands in your own, taking them down from your face to pull him from your hallway into the living room. Snacks and beer already on the coffee table you sat on the sofa with Bucky sitting down beside you.

“What’s on the viewing list for tonight doll?”

You’d been working through Empires list of the 100 Greatest Movies. So far Bucky had loved Toy Story gotten completely confused by the portrayal of Nazi’s in Inglorious Basterds and had down right hated Silence of the Lambs. Turned out the super soldier was not a fan of horror movies. Tonight’s offering was number 41 on the list ‘Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind’.

“It’s the same actress from Titanic” you pointed out as Kate Winslet came onto the screen.

Bucky’s nose scrunched up adorably. “The ship one? Totally unrealistic”

“Hey” you brought your legs up onto the couch using one foot to kick at his thigh. “That’s one of my favourite movies. Don’t you go criticising it Barnes”

He grabbed your ankle to stop you kicking him anymore. “You know my Ma told me about that day, when the news came through that it had sank”

The reminder of just when he had been born hit you but was soon replaced by curiosity. “What did she say?”

His thumb was rubbing circles onto the skin of your ankle as he paused thinking about memories long since hidden. “No one really believed it at first, not until the other shop docked with the survivors. Afterwards there were lies and stories about cover ups.”

“So not much has changed really?”

He smiled ironically “power still corrupts and people with money still rule”

“Well that’s cheery”

Bucky just shrugged, eyes going back to the movie playing on your TV set. About half way through you twisted around so you could lean against him, Bucky’s arm coming around your shoulders so you could settle comfortably against him. He’d popped the top off of a beer and had the bottle dangling from the fingers of his left hand.

You hadn’t actually thought about what this movie showed until the end and Bucky was remaining silent. It was only then that you thought about the memory loss and the machine in the film. About the idea of wiping the memories of someone you used to love. Sure, the people in the movie had done it voluntarily but even so.

“Bucky? You alright?”

His hand tightened on your shoulder. “Would you forget me?” he asked you. “if whatever we have ended badly, would that be enough for you to want to wipe out your whole memories?”

“No” it was a flat statement of absolute certainty. “There is nothing you could ever do that would make me want me forget you James Barnes” when he still didn’t move, tension still in his muscles you reached up grabbing his chin to force him to look at you. “You planning on breaking my heart Sergeant?”

His lips twitched at your poor attempt at a southern accent. “No doll” he reassured you leaning down to kiss the tip of your nose. “I ain’t gonna break it”

“Want to watch another one?”

He was silent a bit longer before shaking his head. Instead he twisted his own body getting his legs up on the sofa one on either side of you, he moved you around so your back was pressed to his chest as he wrapped his arms around you.

You understood his need for touch, knew that he’d been starved of affection for too long and after all it was no hardship for you to simply lay there in his arms. Enjoying the feel of his all around you. He was safety and warmth.

“Have you been busy?”

“Me?” you asked although the question was largely rhetorical “no not really, the university is always quiet over summer so its mainly just the occasional tourist and Ph.D. students”

“and your thesis?”

Groaning you shook your head on his chest “lets just not go there”

His chest rumbled in silent laughter but he did at least manage to keep any other comments to himself. Which was a good job because the subject of your currently stalled Ph.D. thesis was a sore one.

The two of you lapsed back into silence and soon the silence changed to drowsiness and then sleep.


You only woke because your pillow was moving, why was your pillow moving? And why did your pillow smell like Bucky?

Your eyes flickered open and through blurry vision you saw Bucky’s face hovering in front of you. He was crouched beside the sofa and you were now laying only on the cushions with him pulling a blanket over your shoulders.


“Shhh, it’s alright doll go back to sleep”

“You have to leave?”

He nodded “I have to leave”

“No” you gripped onto the collar of his t-shirt like a child refusing to let go of him. “don’t want you to go”

He kissed you softly, his lips moving over yours sent warmth all the way down to your toes. He uncurled your fingers from his shirt and then kissed each of your fingers as well. “You know I don’t want to”

“I know” sighing you pulled your arm back into the warmth under the blanket as he stood pulling his hoody and gloves back on.

You couldn’t watch him leave you once more so instead you closed your eyes as his footsteps grew quieter and then you heard the soft catch of the door.

Yes, you loved Tuesdays, they may be your favourite day of the week because Bucky was there. Wednesday mornings though, well they broke your heart each and every time.


I came across a VERY cool find: a photo tour of the WWE warehouse! The photos above were taken inside the warehouse which holds billions of dollars’ worth of memorabilia, including rings, props, cages, caskets, you name it! There are more photos from the tour here. Definitely worth checking out! Here’s the write-up from the tour:

Back in March WWE and Charity Buzz ran a bunch of Superstars for Kids Auctions which had different Meet and Greet Opportunities. One that really caught my eye was a Tour of the WWE Warehouse and it would be hosted by Howard Finkel and WWE Warehouse Archivist Ben Brown. I wound up winning this auction. Dont ask me how much!!! lol. Although myself and cousin split it. Also it did all go to charity.

I arrived at WWE Headquarters at 9:40 for the scheduled 10am Meet time. Right from when you get off the exit for WWE HQ you can see the building with the WWE Flag at the top. Its such a cool sight! They had us park in the visitors section of the garage. When we entered the hallway from the garage there were various WWE photos of superstars and events lining the walls on the way to the lobby. I asked to use the rest room. I had to take the elevator to the second floor. Inside the elevator they have WWE Programming playing on a small LED screen above the door! Really cool. Once off the elevator, like the previous hallways this one was also lined with different event and superstar photos. Just really cool.

In the lobby they have the life size statues of Andre the Giant and Bruno Sammartino they had on display from the past two Wrestlemanias. They also have a giant size poster of the upcoming PPV for the month. So its currently a Payback poster. First our escort from WWE came down and introduced herself. Shortly after Howard Finkel and WWE Warehouse Archivist Ben Brown came down and said hello. Howard Finkel remembered me from past conventions and last years Wrestlemania Axxess VIP Backstage Tour. After we said our hellos, we all got into a waiting SUV which took us to the WWE Warehouse!

From the outside you would never guess this was the WWE Warehouse. It has no markings at all indicating WWE. Inside the warehouse is huge. Aisles and Aisles of three tiered shelves with nothing but WWE Equipment and Memorabilia. The first section had a bunch of unconstructed rings. The wood for the rings, the ring posts, ropes, ring steps etc. Also in this section was the Punjabi Prison set which was cool to see in person.

The next section had one item I hoped would be there. An actual WWE Ring!!! Ben Brown said they use the ring for training sometimes when wrestlers are in the area. So I asked to make sure if it was ok to get in the ring to take a picture, and they said it was ok. Now I have been inside Indy rings which was cool, but this was an ACTUAL WWE RING. Such a cool moment. i have to say to, the mat was alot harder with alot less give than I thought there would be.

The next section over had alot of cool random stuff. Some of the cool highlights were the original King of the Ring Chair used on TV, the old Wrestlefest Arcade Game, random promo posters, an old Saturday Nights Main Event Entrance Sign and even an Arena used sign from the FINAL WCW PPV. Greed.

Next they had the last remaining piece of the old school blue steel cage, an unconstructed hell in a cell cage, an old original WCW logo sign and the giant fist which used to be part of the Smackdown Set on TV. Ben Brown said the thing weighs 6,000 pounds. They also had a pile of event used barbed wire baseball bats, sledgehammers and other weapons. Back in 2009 at the Bragging Rights PPV they had RAW vs Smackdown and the winner got a Trophy Cup. That was there also. One of the coolest pieces to me was the Original Tumbler used at the early Royal Rumble PPVs which wrestlers would draw their numbers out of.

Another section had all the old caskets used in Undertakers various caseket matches. A few that stood out were an oversized casket used for Big Show, the big black coffin used at the 98 Royal Rumble for Undertakers match vs Shawn Michaels. The one Kane lit on fire at the end. It was all burned and still had the holes Kane put in it with an ax. Another was the one used for Mark Henry at Wrestlemania 22. The lady from WWE who was our escort took a photo of all of us by it and tweeted it from the Official WWE Twitter account. They also had the 2 coffins used in the background during the funeral parlor skits from the early 90s.  Another Undertaker piece was the the big Undertaker logo that was set on fire on Raw back around 1998.

Probably the coolest piece there was the actual ring used in Madison Square Garden for Wrestlemania 1. It was not setup, but you could see all the pieces.

The final couple sections had more random props or event used memorabilia. Slammy Awards, Saturday Nights Main Event Neon Sign. HBK Ring Worn Entrance Gear. L.O.D. Shoulder pads. Damien Sandows MITB Briefcase, Brutus Beefacke Clippers, Andre the Giants and Buddy Rogers boots. Old Womans title from the 50s. John Cenas original US Spinner Title. They even had the actual “contracts” used on WWE TV at contract signings. Two that stood out for me where the Triple H vs Brock Lesnar for Summerslam a few years back and also the Hulk Hogan vs Vince McMahon for Wrestlemania 19 which Hogan made Vince sign in his own blood by busting him open. The contract still had Vinces dried blood on it from 11 years ago!!

I saw so much stuff in the warehouse, yet there were still TONS of boxes unopened that contained even more memorabilia. Some boxes even the Archivist Ben Brown admitted he had not even got around to opening yet. You could spend days upon days in this place. Any true old school WWF fan would LOVE this place.

At the end of the tour Ben Brown gave me an actual event used RAW Ring Skirt which is really cool. After the tour we went to lunch at a BBQ place called Dinosaur BBQ. I never heard of it before, but it was really good food.

After lunch Howard Finkel and Ben Brown said they had one more place they wanted to take us. They brought us to the WWE TV Studios where their HUGE video vault is. The vault room alone was worth the visit. Row after row of shelves from floor to ceiling of ALL the WWE,WCW, AWA, Memphis etc. wrestling tapes. I even saw a shelf with TNA & ROH logos. It was crazy to think that pretty much almost every piece of wrestling footage ever was stored in that room!! The guy who showed us around the TV Studio was George from the duo “George & Adam” from the mid 90s. They played WWF Superfans and did small skits which aired during WWE TV then.

After the TV Studio they took as back to WWE HQ where we then parted ways and started the drive home. I have to say this was an AWESOME Experience. Seeing all those props, sets and pieces of memorabilia brought back so many memories. Definitely worth it to me.

One thing I left out from the TV Studio was one of the areas they showed us was where Lord Alfred Hayes, Sean Mooney or Mene Gene would do the Updates segment from the control center with the tvs in the background. They still have that room just with updated screens.

Also the area Todd Pettengill used to do WWF Mania from. That area is still there also.

Also, I got a kick out of this. Read the “contract” from the 2012 SummerSlam match between Triple H and Brock Lesnar:


So, this is my first attempt at a standalone smut, so hopefully it’s okay! Let me know what you think!

You sighed as you left work, waving goodbye to your colleagues. Thank God it was the weekend and you wouldn’t be due back in again until Monday. You climbed into your car and sat with your head against the steering wheel. It had been a long week for you, with your boss being more of an asshole than usual and deadlines upon deadlines stacking up against you and any plans for a social life, or even just half an hour of peace without anything work related rudely entering your mind.

You were pulled out of your thought as your phone began to vibrate on the passenger seat next to you. It was your boyfriend of several years. Josh had finally gotten a break from touring, even if only for a couple of weeks, and for that, you were grateful.

“Hi Josh, is everything okay?”

“Hi baby, everything is great, I’ve just got back from hanging out with Jesse and Ashley. Just wondering if you’re hungry?”

You’d already eaten dinner, one of the admin guys had just turned 30 so they had ordered in pizza for the whole office. You’d maybe had a slice or two more than you intended, but fuck it! You had earned it from all the hard work you had been putting in!

“Hmm, I’m not hungry for dinner, but there should be stuff in the house for us to make sundaes if that’s okay?”

Josh quickly agreed, stating that everything would be ready for you coming home. Josh did sound pretty excited on the phone, although you weren’t sure if that was because you were coming home, or because Josh had an excuse to eat ice cream for dinner. Possibly the latter.

The message tone rang out whilst you were driving home, tempting you to check the screen, but you persevered until you had pulled up outside of the house you both shared.

~ The door is open baby, meet me in the kitchen

You grabbed your handbag, locking the Audi and making your way to the front door. Pushing open the front door, you were greeted by the sounds of soft romantic music coming from the kitchen. The kitchen door was closed, but you could see a dim glow coming from under the door. You quickly removed your coat, kicked off your high heeled pumps and dropped your bag in the living room.

When you opened the kitchen door, you were not greeted by the view you were expecting. Instead of Josh sitting by the kitchen table, with two bowls of ice cream, the view was something far different. Stood in front of you, Josh was wearing nothing but a pair of low slung boxers, a tiny apron and a chef’s hat. Displayed on the counter tops behind him were a variety of condiments and sprinkles, including your favourites: maraschino cherries and Nutella.

“Instead of making a sundae, I thought maybe you’d like something else for dessert?” Josh stepped towards you, pulling you in for a passionate kiss, which quickly turned to a full blown make out session.

Just as you began feeling dizzy from the lack of air, Josh moved away from your lips, trailing kisses and little nips down your neck and along your collarbone. You moaned a little at the sensation.

You felt something cold against your skin. Looking down, you watched Josh spray a small line of whipped cream from a can down the opening of your shirt, stopping just at the swell of your breasts, before licking it off of your body, watching you intently.

He slowly unbuttoned your work shirt, sliding it down your shoulders before removing your bra. Josh pinched your nipples just the way you liked it, you could feel him pressing against your hip. Clearly he was enjoying this as much as you were.

“Wait here, I want to try something.” Josh disappeared quickly into the living room while your eyes were trained on his ass. You’d spent many a hometown gig, hiding in the wings at the side of the stage watching that ass as he drummed on top of the crowds.

When Joshua entered the kitchen again, you noticed the black tie in his hands. Your stomach flipped a little. You and Josh had discussed (at length over text and skype) trying being blindfolded, and maybe even having your hands tied behind your back, but you hadn’t expected it to happen so soon.

“Trust me?” Josh asked, checking you were comfortable. You nodded quickly as you began to feel excited. He tied the tie around the back of your head, covering your eyes, before continuing to play with your breasts. At first, you could feel Josh’s skilled hands and fingers teasing, pinching and squeezing gently. Then you could only feel one hand on your left breast, still teasing.

“Do you want some ice cream?” You opened your mouth expecting to be spoon fed by Josh.

You were startled as a cold, wet mouth latched itself onto your breast, sucking gently, his tongue swirling around your nipple. You could feel the excitement pooling between your legs, squeezing your thighs together in the hopes of a little friction.

Josh took a large spoonful of ice cream, feeding it to you, before feeding himself another and working on your other breast, giving it just as much attention.

Just when you were excited enough by the attention Josh was lavishing on you, his mouth began to move down your body, trailing kisses down your stomach. He paused to unzip and remove your skirt.

“I’m so lucky you’re mine,” Josh sighed. He had always been a fan of your legs, whether it be in short skirts, a spare pair of his shorts or just when his face was pressed between them.

He slid his hands into the waistband of your tights. You expected him to peel them down slowly to tease you, just like he usually would. It was obvious Josh would be full of surprises tonight as he gave them a quick yank. You could feel ladders beginning to form in the tights. He pressed one hand against your stomach, holding you still as you began to squirm a little, the other hand bundled up in your tights as he tugged hard against them ripping them down the left side.

Josh’s teeth nipped at your right hip as he grabbed at the remaining tights with his teeth pulling them away and tearing them fully from your body.

You heard a little fumbling, causing you to lift the makeshift blindfold and peek a little. Josh was stood by the counter, can of whipped cream in one hand and a jar of Nutella in the other. He turned around, catching you red handed. He gave you a look which was intended to be firm, but you could tell by the smirk on his face that he was amused by your actions. He took a few steps forward, laying the sweet condiments he held on the countertop next to you.

“No peeking or you get punished. Turn around and move the tie back down.” You complied with Josh’s request, turning around to face the kitchen cupboards and pulling his tie down to once again cover your eyes. You could feel Josh step behind you, his breath on the back of your neck, slowly running his hands up and down your sides-

A sharp stinging sensation swept across your ass. He had just spanked you! His palm rubbed softly against the sore spot, before slapping down firmly once again.

You had to admit you were enjoying this more than you had expected. Josh turned you around again, so you would be facing him. You heard him chuckle a little as he hooked his fingers into the sides of your underwear, ripping them off of you as well. He began to kiss from your mid calf to the inside of your thighs, stopping just before you could get too excited.

You could feel a sticky substance (which you could only assume was the chocolate-hazelnut spread) being smeared up the inside of your thighs before Josh’s tongue slid up slowly. He teased you with his tongue, peppering little bites along the way. Once one thigh had been licked bare again, he moved to the other side, mirroring his movements. He moved away again shortly after, for just a few moments before you heard him again.

“This ice cream is delicious, do you want more?”

Before you could answer, you felt a cold wet kiss directly on your core. You gasped as Josh’s tongue darted out, flicking against your already swollen clit. The ice cold sensation on your heated core, along with Josh’s previous teasing had you almost tipped on the edge already.

You moved one hand to the back of Josh’s head, tangled in his hair holding him firmly against you as he licked and sucked. Your other hand pulled the makeshift blindfold off, you didn’t want to miss this view. You looked down, Josh was happily buried between your legs, pulling away to smile at you quickly, before re-attaching himself, and slipping a finger in between your folds to pump slowly.

You began to grind a little against Josh, only encouraging him as he slipped a second finger inside you and began to pump a little faster.

It didn’t take long before you were seeing stars. Josh pulled away, wiping his mouth and kissing his way back up your body, your legs shaking a little in the aftermath.

“You taste even better than ice cream baby.”

Josh spoon-fed you another mouthful of ice cream, which was now melting in the tub, before launching his lips back on your own. You still held the tie in your hand, and you were about to put it to good use.

“Now it’s your turn.” You pushed Josh away a small distance, maybe just a few inches, before wrapping his tie around his wrists, making sure it wouldn’t hurt him, but would hold tight. You pushed him back until he was sat on the island table in the centre of your cosy kitchen. Giving him one final push, Josh fell back until he was lying fully on the table, with his arms above his head, and his legs dangling off of the edge of the table.

You moved over to the side counters looking at the assortment of toppings before deciding on a few. You took a large spoonful of Nutella, dolloping it directly onto Josh’s smooth chest, spreading it out.

Next, you picked up a bottle of sprinkles, shaking them over the chocolate-hazelnut mess you had made. Finally, you finished off your masterpiece with a little of the whipped cream and a few cherries.

You could see that Josh was beginning to get impatient, straining a little against the tie restraint. You giggled a little, picking up Josh’s phone from the side and snapping the perfect picture. Just a little reminder for later.

You dipped your face down to meet Josh’s lips, kissing him hard before moving back over his chest. You licked wide strips down Josh’s chest, stopping just before the waistband of his boxers. This continued until all the Nutella had been removed. You wanted to tease him just as much as Josh had teased you.

“Baby please, enough teasing!” Josh had lifted his head just enough to see you, grinning at him, your face only inches away from where he wanted you to be.

“I don’t think so… if you keep moaning, maybe I’ll blindfold you as well! Or just tie you up and leave you here?” You smirked as you heard his slight whine in response to you.

You slipped your hands up his thighs, sliding just under his boxers and dragging your nails back down, scratching a little and never quite touching exactly where he wanted you to touch.

You took a mouthful of the peppermint chip ice cream, which had so far remained untouched, swirling it around your mouth until you were sure that your mouth would be chilled enough to give the desired effect.

You slowly pulled Josh’s boxers all the way down his legs, before dropping them to the floor. Pre-cum glazed the tip of his cock, as you leaned towards it and started to suck gently, approving moans slipping from Josh’s open mouth as you began swirling your tongue around gently.

Josh’s fingers ran through your hair, tugging a little harder as you began to take him deeper and deeper, inching your way to base of his cock.

You moved away for the briefest of moments to grab the small packet on the side counter and a clean tea towel, causing Josh to groan at the lack of contact.

“Hold on. It’s my turn to try something new now.” You demanded, you knew Josh liked it when you took charge. You rolled the towel until you would be able to use it to your advantage. Moving round to the top of the table where Josh’s head rested, you motioned for him to lift his head. As he complied, you laid the towel over his eyes, knotting it at the side of his head, allowing him to rest his head comfortably back on the kitchen table.

You moved back down until you were between Josh’s legs once more, trailing your fingertips slowly towards his enlarged cock. You lifted the small packet from earlier, emptying about half of the contents into your mouth before continuing to suck gently.

“Oh my God! Is that… pop rocks?” Josh moaned, recognising the slight popping sensation. “It’s different… not bad though!”

After a couple of minutes, you then shifted your focus a little bit more on your techniques rather than the theatrics, meaning it wasn’t long before Josh was like putty in your hands, moaning your name and bucking his hips.

“If you move your hips once more, I swear I’ll give you a reason to move them!” You tried to sound domineering, though the slight snicker from Josh proved otherwise.

“Yeah, like you would!” He scoffed back. You slapped your palm down hard against the side of his thigh, the stinging sensation moving across your hand as you made contact with his bare skin.

“Try me?” You smirked back, knowing you had the upper hand again. Josh tried to wiggle his hands out of the tie still wrapped around his wrists. You used the moment of distraction to your advantage and took Josh’s member fully into your mouth, hitting the back of your throat as you sheathed your teeth with your lips, and began sucking harder, moaning a little enjoying the effect you had on Josh.

You could feel his legs clench a little around your waist, still dangling off the end of the kitchen table, knowing Josh was edging closer to his climax, you upped your game a little.

You pulled away, grabbing Josh’s hands and pulling him towards you until he was stood upright again, removing his blindfold so he could see you sink down to your knees again and finish him off, maintaining eye contact the whole time.

His hands held you in place by the back of your head while you swallowed the salty liquid which came in thick spurts, making sure not to let a single drop fall from between your lips. Josh sat back upright on the table, stroking his fingers up the outside of your thighs and along your backside before resting at the curve of your spine.

“That was incredible baby. Have you been planning to do that all day?” You giggled, nodding your head in agreement.

“At least in the car on the way home. Once the idea popped into my head, it was hard to get rid of it.” Josh took a spoon of the, now fully melted, ice cream and dribbled it onto your chest. He dipped his head, kitten licking at your chest, swirling his tongue around each nipple in turn, until they were once again stiffened peaks. Josh’s hand trailed back down towards your core, once again, a familiar slickness spreading between your thighs. Josh soon found the source of the wetness, his fingers parting your folds and playing with your clit.

Josh licked his lips, grinning at you, showing the perfect pointed teeth that you loved so much. “Did I really make you this wet baby girl? Did I do this to you?”

Josh slipped a finger inside of you, adding another soon after stretching you a little.

“How do you think you’d like it if I tied you up and fucked you hard against this table? Make it so your legs tremble and you can’t even walk? Make you see stars when I pound into you and make you scream my name?” Josh removed his fingers from you, causing you to whimper at the loss of contact. He pushed you away a little, before walking past you, towards the front door.

Josh returned a few moments later, with your heels from earlier in his hand. “Can you put these on please? It’ll make the height difference a little easier.”

You followed Josh’s request, slipping on your heels on, allowing you to almost see eye to eye with Josh. He turned you around until you were facing away from him, feeling his member pressed hard against your backside.

Josh slipped the tie around your wrists, looping it around several times before tying it tight enough to make sure you can’t wriggle free. Josh pushed you forward gently until your chest was resting on the table, before surprising you with another firm smack to your backside.

Josh rubbed his erection against your core, teasing you, making sure you were even wetter than you had been all night. He rocked his hips back and forth, so, so achingly slow, pausing for just a second at your entrance, before continuing to tease you further.

“Josh… please just fuck me already-” You whined, the desperation in your voice catching you off guard and surprising even you. You noticed you were pushing back against Josh, even grinding a little, hoping he would give up the foreplay.

“Baby, the whole neighbourhood will know my full name by the time I’m finished with you.” Josh smirked, you could hear it in his husky voice. He didn’t wait for you to reply before he pushed into you, causing you moan loudly.

“That’s right baby, I want to hear your sweet moans fill this kitchen.” Josh again slapped his hand against your rear, before pushing into you up to the hilt, filling you completely. Josh began to build up a steady rhythm, working up to a fast pace.

You could feel the tops of your thighs hitting against the table every time Josh thrust into you. Josh’s hands were gripping your hips too, his fingertips squeezing tight against the mounds of skin. He was going to leave bruises on you by the morning for sure. Little reminders of the passion you had shared that night. It wasn’t long before you could feel your climax approaching for the second time tonight.

“Fuck, you’re so tight. You feel so good squeezing around me. I’m almost there baby, just hold on a little longer.” You barely held it together long enough for Josh to finish as you came undone around him, your legs trembling underneath you in the aftermath, just as Josh had promised. He pulled out of you, scooping you up in his arms and carried you to the bedroom you shared, before laying you on the bed.

“That was amazing, how long have you been planning that?” Josh shrugged in response to your question, climbing in besides you and wrapping his arms around you, before answering you.

“I get bored on tour and sometimes my mind wonders, y’know!”

“Well Joshua, can’t wait to see what else you’ve been thinking about on tour!” You smirked, cuddling closer to him as he ran his fingers through your hair.

“Just wait until tomorrow baby…”

Headcanon SPG day-to-day/non-performance outfits:

  • The Spine wears a dress shirt and slacks every day cause he is Respectable and Boring. 
  • Rabbit dresses the way I wished I could dress when I was 14, like a Hot Topic exploded. Leg warmers and fingerless gloves and graphic tshirts for days. If Ebony Darkness Dementia Raven Way wore it then Rabbit probably has too. Except fishnets, those always snag in her joints. 
  • Upgrade doesnt need clothes because she’s too busy being a dragon. But when she does turn back into a robot who looks like a girl to visit home or explore Kazooland with The Jon she likes rompers, or overalls paired with a floral top. 
  • The Jon still wears slacks, suspenders, his feathered hat, and canvas sneakers just like his stage outfit, but with a fun or bright tshirt instead of a dress shirt. Occasionally he swaps the slacks for a skirt. His socks almost never match. 
  • Hatchworth hasn’t really updated his fashion sense since the 1920s, it was behind the times even before he was put in the vault, and he is quite happy to continue wearing sweater vests and knickerbockers thank you. He has become a fan of fun patterned socks however. His favorite pair has little sandwiches on them. 
  • And finally you cannot tell me Zero’s wardrobe isnt still stuck in the 90s. And he wears his own merch without shame.