still need someone to help me though

anonymous asked:

Please help me. I have an older brother who has verbally and phycologically abused me to the point where I can't be around him without feeling scared and angry. I don't want him to be arrested (even though he's an adult and I'm just a teen) and I don't want him to die. All I want is for him to move out and only visit once a month or so. What do I do? I need him to stop. I don't know how he got this way.I don't know what to do. He hadn't physically hurt me, but still. I'm in pain. Can I fix him?

Hi friend,

Have you told anyone else about the abuse? I think that’s your first step. Whether it be a parent or therapist, pastor, teacher, etc. You need to talk to someone who can help you figure out the next step. (Though parent may be best as I’m assuming you’re both living with said parent(s) and that’s who can adjust the living situation.)

As for your second question, no, you can’t fix him. Only God can do that. What you can do is pray for him. Pray for him and forgive him (this may take time) and continue to love him from a safe distance. You don’t even have visit once a month or so if you don’t want to once he eventually moves out (or once you do–whichever comes first). That’s your choice. 

Seeing a therapist (if you’re not already) might be something to consider as well. 

I’m so sorry you’re in pain, and I’m so sorry this happened. Stay strong, friend. Keep praying and reading His Word and know that the pain does fade. (And feel free to message me privately with any more questions/updates.)

I’ll be praying for you and your family. <3

All my love,

S. 

“I need you” Sentence Starters

aka my life and yours are two parts of a whole

  • “I can’t do this without you.”
  • “Don’t let go of my hand through this, please.”
  • “If you walk away everything will fall apart.”
  • “All I want is your lips against mine right now.”
  • “It wasn’t just a one off for me; it was me hoping you’d see the connection.”
  • “We’ve been through everything else together.  This is no different.”
  • “You’re my other half.”
  • “There’s no one else I’d rather have with me than you.”
  • “You need to help me, I can’t do this alone.”
  • “I’ve never felt alone since you came into my life.”
  • “What am I supposed to do if you walk away?”
  • “This distance is killing me.”
  • “Don’t let this distance tear us apart.”
  • “I need you as much as you need me.”
  • “Letting go was never an option.”
  • “All the time did was make me realize that you’re supposed to be with me.”
  • “I’ve made so many mistakes, but you’re not one of them.”
  • “I need you to help me reach the top shelf.”
  • “Two people aren’t this made for each other so easily.”
  • “You’re worth any fight.”
  • “I’m crying on the floor and nothing’s right, but I know you can make this better.”
  • “I’m way too drunk to be driving, so I was gonna walk home– stay on the phone with me, okay?”
  • “There’s this couple’s contest, and I know we’re not dating, but the grand prize is this big ass load of food– help me.”
  • It doesn’t matter if you need me; you broke everything.”
  • “Everything’s really shitty right now.  So how about you get in this car with me and we drive to wherever for however long?”
  • “I’ll go if you go.”
  • “I’ll only do this if you help me.”
  • “I can’t depend on anyone else, just you.”
  • “Thank you for always being here for me.”
  • “You could call be at any time and I’d drop anything if you needed me.”
  • “All you have to do is show me that you feel the same.”
  • “I know that I need you, but sometimes the feeling doesn’t seem reciprocated.”
  • “I’m pathetic, because I go to you for everything, but you’d pick someone over me any day.”
  • “Can you give me a ride?”
  • “I didn’t tell anyone else I was leaving… You deserved to know though.”
  • “I’ll still be here when you get back.”
  • “Isn’t in terrifying that we both couldn’t go without the other?”
  • “This ring proves that I’m always here for you.”
  • “Come here, let me give you a hug.”
  • “My date stood me up, can you come with me to egg his/her car?”
  • “My date stood me up, can you come pick me up?”
  • “The lights don’t shine as bright when you’re not here.”
  • “I can’t deal with us drifting apart anymore.”
  • “I feel like I’m gripping with all my might and you’re not even lifting a finger.”
  • “My friend locked me outside naked.  Help.”
  • “My friend needs to see I’m dating someone so they’ll stop including me in blind dates–yes, I know we’re not dating, but still.”
  • “I don’t call you my partner in crime for no reason.”
  • “Can you come over so I don’t feel so alone anymore?”
  • “You ran to get here this quickly?!”
  • “I need you.”

Send a name and a sentence xx

How yoi plays with sports story scheme

I was wondering recently why Yuri on Ice seemed to be so different and fresh to me and why so many people get so emotionally engaged with it. There is definitely a nice animation and great characters and representation and such a beautiful love story but I felt like there was something in the narration layer that I couldn’t name until I compared yoi storyline to the most common schemes.

When you look at most of the pop cultural stories, especially those where main plot focuses on sport, you’ll see that there is that one scheme they all follow - you have a hero who has talent but lacks something (like a good mentor or hard work or confidence), he finds a motivation to win (it may be anything from parent’s death to wish to impress a girl) and he finds a dedicated coach, he trains, he loses, he learns something about himself, he wins, he gets an award. This is the basic way of constructing such stories and it’s catchy because we all want to believe that we are able to fight our weaknesses and win by ourselves. You may modify this scheme to a large extent but the main core will always be a single hero who needs to grow in order to win and actually I think that this scheme is present in Yuri on Ice but in Yurio’s not Yuuri’s story. Yurio has talent, lacks hard work and needs to learn something about himself, his skate-off with Yuuri gives him a motivation to win, he trains hard, he loses, he grows, he wins. This doesn’t make his story or his character less interesting but I wanted to give you an example of what am I talking about so I could compare it to Yuuri’s story.

So now, where is Yuuri’s plot different you could say. Well, in a way you could find all those elements in Yuuri’s story too but his development is where it all turns to be innovative. You see in the basic scheme the hero needs to learn to win by himself while Yuuri has got to that point a long time ago. He had all of that: his motivation, his hard work, most of his abilities, his own strength before he met Victor. He was fighting by himself for five years before and even if his anxiety makes him look like a weak loser it is obvious he is already beyond that “learning about myself” phase. Even this confidence Victor helps him to find he already had just hidden. Yuuri knows his emotions and some of his strengths and most of the weak points himself and either he wins or loses those minor competitions it doesn’t change him too deeply. But what Victor gives him is the belief that he doesn’t have to fight by himself anymore. Not in a “you can learn from other people” or “teamwork is important” kind of way (’cause they are still used in most of the stories) but in acknowledging that you may become better if you let someone close to you (this lesson applies to Victor to btw but he is not the main hero so I’ll skip this part). 

I won’t say this reverses the scheme completely as this is still some kind of personal development that helps to win (though the fact that Yuuri does not finally win is interesting by itself) but it definitely changes the subtext of the whole story.  We like stories about heroes fighting by themselves because we often struggle with our problems alone and we need to believe me can do it. But Yuri on Ice gives us the idea that thought you are strong enough to fight maybe you don’t have to fight alone at all. I guess this is why it has such a great emotional impact because in a world that tells you all the time that it’s only for you to win the story of someone who still needed help even if he already was strong and beautiful is really hopeful, positive and in a way more realistic then the basic “hero can only win by himself” scheme. 

There is also the whole layer of how Victor doesn’t fit to the standard portrayal of a mentor figure but I think this is quite easy to spot and maybe let’s not make this longer than it has to be but the last quick reflection I had is that the most common way of portraying romantic relationships in the sports stories is either when the hero needs to sacrifice his relationship in order to focus (which is the trope I personally hate) or when he wins the attention of his love interest by winning the final competition (so the love is somehow a reward then). What is great in Yuuri and Victor’s relationship is how Yuuri doesn’t have to win to prove his worth to Victor. Almost from the beginning, Victor knows Yuuri’s flaws and he falls for him anyway. So Yuuri is not only given support that helps him to become better but also he doesn’t need to earn that support. Which I think again is quite moving because everyone dreams of this kind of relationship. We are all scared that we are not good enough to let someone help us in the first place and this is where yoi tells us it doesn’t have to be this way.

I’m sure there are much more tropes that are reversed in yoi and there is the whole narration layer that is also quite original but as storytelling is what I have the most experience with I decided to focus on this aspect only. And I may be wrong I just like to find and discuss narration schemes so please argue if you disagree but I love the fact that even when yoi takes those basic narration schemes it uses it to send a very positive message across and for me it could be a reason why there is such an enthusiastic fandom around it - because this anime exchanges the story of fighting alone for a story about growing in a relationship though it does not change a sports story for a cheaply romantic one.

i don’t think i’ve ever seen anything as beautiful as aomine being all happy and excited when playing against kagami because he has finally found a worthy rival in him

subsubject  asked:

Can you please update the soul mark tag. It would be much appreciated😊

cant say no to this

Written in the Stars by Quixoticity (6/6 | 26,561 | R)

Derek Hale is a lucky guy. He’s got a great family, good friends, and a fulfilling job as a tattoo artist.

He’s also one of the twenty-five per cent of the population born with a soul mark.

He likes his life, but he’s waiting for his soul-match. The odds of meeting them aren’t great but hey, Derek’s a lucky guy. He has faith.

He can’t believe how good his luck really is when one day his soul-match wanders right into his studio, all long limbs and copper eyes. There’s just one problem: Stiles is there to get his soul mark covered up. Permanently.

You can’t be real by myhead_myuniverse (3/3 | 4,000 | G)

It wasn’t that he didn’t want him, want Stiles. It’s just that he was fucked up and everything that he touched died. It wasn’t that he didn’t like him, it’s that he deserved better. The human was just so smart and courageous. He was always the one saving everyone’s ass even with no powers.
He was creative, loyal, smart and caring. And he was too good to let Derek ruin him.
So he tried his hardest to stay away. He treated him like he was just an annoying defenceless human even though the wolf knew he wasn’t. He was practically certain that Stiles would survive the longest out of all of them. He tried to act like he didn’t need him, even though Stiles already saved his ass a couple of times now. His wolf was already so attached to the human that Derek still needed to work on his control every day.

In Which Laura Is Never Going To Let Derek Live This Down by Omimouse (1/1 | 1,587 | PG13)

Prompt: A soulmate fic where you’ve got “Help! Save me!” on your wrist. So you do the martial arts classes, and ROTC, and get a concealed carry permit, you are READY, you are SO up for this… and then one day you’re at a friend’s house, and someone comes pounding down the stairs laughing and ducks behind you and goes “Help! Save me!” and that’s how you find out your soulmate was escaping a tickle fight.

“Laura, for the love of god, stop laughing and get him off of me.”

Fight Fear for the Selfish Pain (it was worth it every time) by LadySlytherin (1/1 | 11,779 | PG13)

After Kate Argent pretended to be his soulmate and burned most of his family alive, Derek resigned himself to a life alone, unwilling to trust the mark on his wrist again.

Stiles Stilinski has never seen his soulmark - and never will - so he’s accepted that he’ll never know the person who’s supposedly perfect for him.

Fate is a funny thing, and it has a way of leveling the playing field in ways no one would expect.

Of Soulmates, Pseudonyms and Misunderstandings by halcyon1993 (1/1 | 10,732 | PG13)

Ever since he asked his mother one evening why she had his dad’s name tattooed on the inside of her left wrist, Derek has dreamed of finding his soulmate. There’s only one problem—the name that appears on his wrist on his eighteenth birthday is something he can’t even read.  

anonymous asked:

How do you avoid burnout during the school year? I always find myself doing really well the first semester than completely unmotivated during second semester. Also, I love your blog!!!💜💜

Hey! 

For me, it’s the exact opposite - I’m always doing way better in summer than in winter, haha. But ok, here we go: 

  • Always have something to look forward to. Every day, every week, every month, no matter how small. The big goal is the beginning of the holidays (presumably), but you need things to keep you going until then! A café visit on the weekend, a football match on TV, a new episode of your favourite show, a nice bath - whatever works for you. Also good as a reward for studying and work you’ve done that day. 
  • Don’t study every day. I always try to have one day off from studying each week. This doesn’t contradict the “no zero days” - principle - you can be productive every day, but that doesn’t have to mean studying! You can do laundry, you can work, you can clean, you can take care of correspondence - loads of possibilities. Also, one day off gives you an emergency time frame for assignments you forgot or unexpectedly need more time for. 
  • Make time for what you love. Even if it isn’t as much time as you’d like, it will help to not make you go crazy with all your studying. I play tennis once a week - I would love to play three or four times a week, but I can’t, at least not during the semester. Once a week isn’t much, but it’s enough to keep me going. You need a balance between school and other activities, especially exercise and arts - my piano teacher knows I can’t practice as much as I’d have to when I have exams, but I still go to my lessons even though I hardly make progress then. He’s fine with it and helps me improve during the little time I can spend on it - it makes a huge difference! Not playing piano at all would be much worse. 
  • Have someone keep watch. A friend, your parents, or someone else - tell them to pay attention to what you do, and tell you if they notice that you aren’t eating well, that you don’t sleep enough, that you don’t go outside enough etc. It’s easy to forget about those things, and if you have a lot of studying to do it’s faster to eat some biscuits than to cook a proper meal. 

Good luck in your next school year! If someone else has tips, please add them. :) 

TRAUMA - Symbolism

This will be my last post on Trauma (I’ve fangirled enough and I’ll go back to reblogging gifs after this lmao)

Naturally, these are my own opinions of the MV. My Korean is extremely weak, and so I will be focusing on the actual music video and symbolism, until some sort of official lyrics are posted.

It took me a couple watches to really feel the heaviness in this song and I think a lot of symbolism in this MV shows us the dark side of stardom.

The first thing I’ll mention is a tweet by @SVTAnanas on twitter. They talk about us shipping Meanie and how it can actually have a negative impact on their friendship. Wonwoo is quite introverted and a private kind of guy. I can see how this can affect him. 

The mirrors can indicate being obsessed with personal appearance as it is their “job” to look good. In “끝이 안보여”, there’s a lyric: ‘I see myself in the mirror with several days worth of makeup. My skin is ruined and I feel like I lost my goal. The dark circles underneath just get deeper’. To this day, that lyric has struck with me. I can’t imagine how difficult life must be for idols

In No FUN, Wonwoo raps: ‘Let me ask again, Was it Fun? You think everything’s fine if the visuals are okay?’ and he goes on about having to look good everytime. This is, again, stemming from this ridiculous expectation that idols HAVE to be good looking in order to be acknowledged.

Idols spend their life as an “item” that people think they can own. 

When I saw this, I thought of the words “outside looking in”, about how we’re always looking into their lives and them letting us, having no privacy for themselves. Also the walls are green (*gets war flashbacks of 17TV*)

Vernon was also in a room full of fans. Those fans can be taken quite literally I think. The fans are pointed towards him (aka: watching him closely?)

Mingyu has ropes tied around him most times, with strings hanging down. He’s in a room, which can symbolize a private space, but the ropes and strings of expectation still hang down on him.

And, something that genuinely had me tearing up:

Despite teamwork, despite support, there is always someone who has to shoulder all the responsibility. Yes, Seventeen has three leaders, but Coups, being the oldest, and the overall leader, is a huge task. It is a giant burden, which I assume, can sometimes be quiet lonely. 

The members can go to Seungcheol for help and advice and I genuinely hope he feels as though he can go to them when he’s in need of some advice himself. 

I’ll conclude this post with a slightly more cheerful observation:

HHU speaks about being/feeling alone in this song, when in reality they’re all together and have each other to go to. It is revealed near the end that it is in fact one big room and they’re all inside it together. SVT is a family which means no one gets left behind or forgotten and whatever they go through, they will weather it together.

[Note: Coups did mention that we pay attention to the lyrics for these Unit MVs, so I’ll get on that when I have a good translation available]

on self-diagnosing

when i was about 14, i went to a mental health service and was diagnosed with major depression and generalized anxiety disorder. i got put on antidepressants that didn’t work and went to a few therapists that didn’t help me. my parents wasted hundreds, if not thousands, of dollars getting me treated for disorders that were not my true problem.

when i was 21, i went through the hardest break-up of my life. i went to a counselor who didn’t diagnose me at all - she talked to me like she didn’t care what my mental health issues were and that’s when i realized it doesn’t matter what your diagnosis is, as long as you’re getting treated for the problems that lie in front of you.

last year, when i was 21/22, i experienced a few bpd episodes. on new years, i got someone i was barely friends with to drive me over 30 minutes to my ex’s house to punch him in the face over something stupid. i couldn’t believe how manic it made me feel - i felt totally on top of the world. until the next day where the guilt swallowed me alive and i was stuck in yet another bout of depression. a couple months later, i found myself breaking down in the college stairwell over drama with another boy, calling my parents and telling them i was going to kill myself after he blocked me. they had to come pick me up because they didn’t think i would be okay if i drove.

i didn’t understand what was up with these symptoms. why did all of my depression stem from my relationships? why did i want to fling myself off of a bridge after the smallest disagreement? i was more than depressed - i was angry. i was so, so angry. for as long as i can remember, i’d cycle through the worst emotions followed by mania followed by the worst emotions. but it happened so fast, i could barely remember it by the time i got a chance to tell anyone.

i got back into therapy, into medication. i got put on a different antidepressant. i told my doctor, “you don’t understand. i have bouts of anger. do you have anything for that?” she prescribed me an anxiety medication for panic attacks.

the point is doctors do what they can to treat you. they don’t know what is going to help. they’re stumbling around blindly until they find something that works. they don’t truly know what’s going on in your head. they try to diagnose you on your first appointment at a mental health service and if you don’t portray all of your symptoms perfectly, you WILL get an incorrect diagnosis.

i never did my own research. i fed into the lie that psychiatrists/psychologists will do anything in their power to give you a correct diagnosis. i never self-diagnosed until i heard about bpd. luckily, i was already going to a psychiatrist when i heard about it, so i brought it up to him. he said, “huh, yeah, you’re probably right. that does sound like your symptoms” and prescribed me an anti-psychotic. still no diagnosis.

let me reiterate: i could have been getting the help i needed for YEARS, and i didn’t, because though i went through quite a few therapists and psychiatrists, none of them could figure out my diagnosis. it took the couple of “bpd freak-outs” i had for someone to take me seriously. for someone to finally say, “you have a lot of bipolar symptoms…” still not the right diagnosis, but it was getting closer, at least. if i didn’t have those freak-outs, i can guarantee you i still wouldn’t even have a “huh, yeah.” because in the world of psychiatrists (and a lot of times people who are anti self-diagnosis), your symptoms don’t matter until you have the worst possible symptoms, until your symptoms are outward, and that’s unfair and ridiculous.

so this is where the line gets blurred. to those who are anti self-diagnosis: am i allowed to say i have bpd because my psychiatrist told me i did but didn’t officially diagnose me? i ultimately stopped going to a psychiatrist and therapy because i spent another thousand dollars (out of my own pocket this time) to diagnose myself and i didn’t agree with the medication i was on. should i go back for one appointment just to satisfy your need for me to be officially diagnosed?

thinking back on the counselor i had when i was 21, i realized that the diagnosis doesn’t matter. but nobody takes you seriously unless you have a diagnosis and this is what’s wrong, not the fact that people self-diagnose. maybe if people took the symptoms seriously, people wouldn’t find the need to self-diagnose. maybe if mental illness wasn’t this exclusive club, people would feel more comfortable talking about their symptoms, even if they’re less drastic than yours are.

the point is this: somebody self-diagnosing doesn’t affect you. the only reason people knock people for self-diagnosing is because they want to feel powerful and elite. congratulations - you have an official diagnosis. i have three if you count adhd. but my most important number four diagnosis is being left untreated and tumblr has helped me get though a lot of my bpd-related issues and to that, i am thankful. because the resources are always going to be more important than the diagnosis and i am happy that those who self-diagnose are getting the resources they need.

I don’t know why people hate writing or have such a hard time doing it. I guess they’re not as inspired as I am when I think of you. Which is weird considering all I have to write about is the past. Past stories, past heartache, how everything we ever had and ever will have is in the past. That is a scary, earth shattering, heart-wrenching thought. That every memory I have of you are the only ones I will ever have. Except, if maybe, I am fortunate enough to ever run into you one day. It will be awkward and uncomfortable, but at least I’ll get to look at those blue eyes one more time. 
I’ve spent the last few months convincing myself that we weren’t a “right person, wrong time” situation. You were exactly what I needed at that point in my life. You helped me through some of my darkest, most dramatic moments. Even though I wish you were still around to help me fight my demons, I wouldn’t have won those battles without you by my side. 
I guess I still struggle with getting over you because it came down to me not being good enough. And that is a hard thing to cope with no matter who it comes from. But it is very hard to hear it from someone you love, someone you’re in love with. And no, you didn’t flat out say it, you didn’t have to, I could just tell
P R E S S U R E { 1 }

;series;

{Part 2} {Part 3} {Part 4} {Part 5} {Part 6} {Part 7}

Pairing: Reader X Yoongi

Word Count: 6,748

Genre: Romance, Smut, Fluff

Warnings: Smut, daddy kink, cursing

Summary: After dating for almost 3 years, the armys and Yoongi’s label have found out about your relationship. Now you have to deal with it in your extraordinarily normal life.



I didn’t mean to start dating Min Yoongi. I’d simply gone into New York City. I had taken the day off from work weeks in advance and gone in with my friends then ran into him at Bryant Park. I’d heard BTS before, but honestly, I had no clue that they were there at that time. I later learned it was for some meeting, but we never really talked about the details of one of our favorite days.

We’d made eye contact. He was in front of the fountain taking pictures of it and himself, and I’d noticed him out of the corner of my eye. When we tell this story, he likes to say that I was staring at him with heart eyes. In reality, I watched him for 10 seconds and within that time he’d notice me and given me a coy smile. Then he jogged back over to Jimin and Namjoon and I shook my head clear of that and back into my friends conversation.

I hadn’t noticed the 3 boys following us across the street into Kinokuniya Bookstore. We simply went across the street to look at the manga, figures, and all of the cute stationary. I was there with my two best friends, Alicia and Julianna. They had wandered off, crying about some manga about stray dogs and I was alone in the basement of the store, looking at the stationary when I felt a heat on the back of my neck. I always got nervous when I was alone, simply because I had some terrible anxiety.

I was the mom friend in the group, so I had to take charge in certain situations. For some reason, inside of flight I choose fight. Boy, was it the right choice. I’d turned around the see who was staring at me and it was him, Him with his blonde hair. Him with his soft face. Him with his all black outfit and snapback, hiding from the world.

Before I got the chance to ask why he was staring at me, he stepped closer and held out his hand.

“Min Yoongi.” he introduced and I shook it.

“(Y/N) (Y/L/N). Can I asked why a perfectly good stranger has been watching me like some creep.”

He chuckled. I melted. “Well, I can’t help myself to do anything, but to look at you. You kind of have my full attention and I also thought it was a little creepy. Obviously, you noticed me. So, I thought I would introduce myself.”

“What a gentleman.”

“You know, they have this cute little cafe on the top floor. Wanna come get lunch with me?”

His english was a little broken, but I managed to catch his drift and pick up on what he was saying. The way he spoke was almost rehearsed. Later, I found out that Namjoon helped him learn this little monologue so he could speak to me.

Then it was all a part of history. Our history. The six of us had a lunch together and Yoongi and I hit it off. He was trying so hard to speak my language, even though Namjoon had to help him a bunch. He was so… into me. It was crazy. I’d never had such an instant spark with someone, especially someone so reserved at first. I had always had this weird outgoing, loud guy type.

He was so captivating. He still is. Anyways, that’s how it started. After that lunch, he’d invited us to their concert that night. When I carried on, stressing out about how I had nothing to wear, he just waved me off. My girlfriends laughed at my constant need to worry about the silliest things in the world, just stating “This is how I was.” and that “he’d have to get used to it”. Which he responded with, “I plan on it.”.

On the way out of the store, he grabbed my hand and led me down the avenue. We were both totally aware he had no idea where he was off to, but he’d decided I was going to get a whole new outfit then stay at his hotel. I’d felt like I’d known Min Yoongi for years. His personality just vibed with me and the hotel part didn’t even come across in a creepy way? Then we shopped and went to his show.

Obviously, the next day he was gone. Off to some other city. But he never left me. My days were full of constant texts and calls. My weeks became filled with him flying in whenever he had a day off. My months were made up of stolen kisses and my year ended up in a relationship. It was a secret and we could handle it. The constant separation made keeping this secret from his record label so much easier.

Until 2 years later. 2 years into my bliss, we were caught by one of his fans. He’d flown in for the weekend and one of them had followed the car he got picked up in from the airport all the way to a parking lot of a Mcdonald’s where he hopped into my car. We were in for some shit, let me tell you. My mentions were filled and so was my phone. BigHit now owned me in a way, sadly. After signing a bunch of contracts about how I wasn’t playing Yoongi and that I couldn’t run away with his money and I couldn’t reveal more intimate parts of him and if we got married I had none of his BTS assets and all of that dumb shit, I thought it had died down.

The armys didn’t hate me. Well, obviously some did, but the others made me feel welcome. Made me feel less scared about going public with my relationship with my boyfriend of almost 3 years. I was very straight forward with the things I could talk about and did whatever his record label asked me to. At first, it started with an hour long interview, talking about myself and us. Why we kept this all a secret and such. It ended with them surprising me with what I thought was a skype call, but Yoongi ended up being there. After 4 months.

When we were on the skype call, he told me to close my eyes for a moment so he could put on something silly or whatever. Then I smelt him, as weird as it sounds. He wore my favorite cologne and I started crying before he wrapped his arms around me. Within seconds I was buried into his chest, sobbing, as he held his hands on my face. He wiped away my tears for camera effect, but he also made sure to block my face from the limelight. He knew I’d be even more upset if there were suddenly gifs of me hysterical on the internet.

So, blah blah blah, right? Now, I’ll bring us to today. Currently, I was hiding in the fridge at my job at a super market deli. My manager knew I was in here and I was even preparing food in here to go in the showcase. Currently there were a bunch of pre-teen girls standing at the counter, all looking for me. It’d been like this for the past week and my manager Steve happened to feel bad for me today.

A few hours earlier, my twitter started to go crazy. The Big Hit account had decided to use me for some retweets and tweeted out my work address. So now it looked like I was having a fucking meet and greet, so I decided to be trapped in the fridge. Yep.

Steve walked in and kind of chuckled at me as I packed some yams into a dinner container. “I know you’re having a hard time out there, but we could really use you. It’s a little busy out there. It’s your meet and greet after all.” Then he broke into a full on laughter, patting his chest, to make sure he could still breathe at the end of it. I didn’t laugh because it wasn’t funny. Not funny at all. “I’m glad you’re sticking this out, you know, taking one for the team back here.”

In all reality, I wanted to ask to go home. It was starting to get cold and I forgot a jacket, but I needed the money. Not all of us could be K-pop idols and I didn’t want to really want to have to rely on him for money. Well, he sort of ruined my job. And my life. Maybe I could bill him for work interruption. I’ll sue him. That’s it, I’ll sue him. I’m not exactly sure for what yet, but I texted informing him about the lawsuit. He didn’t respond.

He also didn’t respond to my 20 other texts messages freaking out about the armys at my job or about how his record label was trying to sabotage our relationship. He was probably in the middle of overworking himself in whatever country he was in today. I had stopped trying to keep up with each individual one and just knew the basic area of where he was. I think it was Korea. Or maybe Japan. I knew it wasn’t America. That was in half a week.

They had a 2 weeks vacation and he’d decided to spend it with me. Every time he got a break, he tried to waste it all on me. I always bullied him into going home to be with his family or spend time with the band and the last 4 days would be reserved for us. This time he’d convinced me to let him stay with me the whole time. He’d even called my store and requested the two weeks off for me as he planned whatever he was going to do. So, starting Monday I would no longer be trapped here, I guess.

As soon as all of the dinner were packed, I stacked them onto a tray and kicked open the fridge door, subsequently hitting one of the chef’s, Mike, with it. “Ahh, she emerges.” he joked, pushing my hat lower over my eyes. “Maybe you should go say hi to them. They’ve been here since your shift started.” He nodded at the 50 girls filling up the coffee lounge outside of the deli. I swished my mouth back and forth, debating the situation. “I’ll go with you, if that’s what you need. I know you want to, nervous nelly.”

I put the dinners down and grabbed my bag on my way back to my tundra. I pulled up the step ladder and took out my makeup bag, deciding now would be a good time to look good. Of course I wanted to go meet the girls. They made my boyfriend happy and support him. They support us. I guess it really did look bad if I hid all day. I was just so anxious about the entire situation. I wasn’t the famous one. I was kind of just riding along with the love of my life who happened to be a bit popular.

I pulled off my hat and took out the ponytail within my hair. I ran my hands through it and of course it was already a bit knotted. Nothing could ever be easy in my life. Whatever, this was for him. For his label. In the back of my mind I couldn’t shake the horrible feeling that everyone out there would jump me for dating him, but they were there. Here to see me. Hell, what do I even do? I work, I’m not even in school, and I sing in a band that purely plays in my friends garage because we can’t get our act together to even have a name.

I stood up and cleared my throat a bunch. When I got nervous my voice seemed to crack and I stepped out of my tomb. “Wish me luck.” I said to the guys I worked with and they just laughed and waved me off.

I pushed open the double doors and heard a few noises come from the direction I was headed in. “H-Hey guys.” I smiled, giving a little wave to the girls as they proceeded to run over to me and surround me. First, it started slow. I thought maybe they’d kind of stare at me from a distance, but oh no. Of course nothing can be civil and easy with me, can it?

They started getting closer to me and snapping selfies all around me, throwing out questions about Yoongi.

“What’s he like in bed?” I can’t discuss that. I legally can’t.

“Is this just a publicity thing? So the armys can feel like they have a chance?” No, I’m in love with him. He’s in love with me.

“You’re so fucking pretty. It makes me feel so shitty.” I’m so sorry. I’m so so so sorry. Please, don’t feel that way. You’re absolutely beautiful.

“Is BTS gonna tour here soon?” I don’t know.

“Why have you been hiding from us? What exactly are you hiding, Y/N?” Nothing. I was so scared. I’m so scared.

I wanted to respond to everything. I wanted to defend myself. I couldn’t get a word out edgewise, everything was trapped in my thoughts. I just smiled for all of the pictures and videos they were taking of and with me. I didn’t start to cry until I heard Steve yell for me behind the deli counter, asking if I was alright. Then I became hysterical. I covered my face and closed my eyes, only to hear him running across the wooden floor. He lightly pushed through the girls and pulled me out of there, back to my safe haven of the deli fridge.

Fuck.


I’d been excused to leave work early after that and Steve told me not to come in the next day either. After a little bit of a fight about it, he told me to start my days off early and that he’d talk to his boss about asking if those can be paid vacation days. I knew he’d say no however. The store manager had been pushing for me to work more because of all of the business I’d been bringing in by simply working there. We were up by around half a grand a day and boy did that make him look good.

When I pulled into my driveway, I unplugged the aux cord from my car and dialed one of the numbers I knew by heart. Yoongi’s international number. I rarely called him without asking, but I knew he had my phone call volume on. Only when it was an emergency I’d phone him right away.

It rang three times. “Mmmm, baby? What’s up?” Oh, he sounded so sleepy. I felt bad for about 5 seconds before I started yelling.

“How could you sleep through all of my messages? Boy, have I had a day.” I unlocked my door and slammed it behind me, only locking the top lock. I threw myself on the couch as I heard him groaning about sitting up to check his phone.

“Facetime.” Then he hung up and face timed me this time. By this point, I was upside down on my couch with a red face and an angry expression. I hit the green button. “You look so grumpy.” He chuckled.

“I am grumpy. Please don’t go on twitter for a few days?”

“So, armys were at your job.” I saw his face sink a little as he leaned against the wall.

I sat upright and fixed my hair in the camera mirror. “I kind of started crying and I got excused from work until after my vacation days. They probably think I’m crazy, Gloongs.”

“You’re calling me Gloongs? Look at you. The new dwarf in Snow White. Mopey.”

“I’m gonna hang–”

“No. Please no. You’re not okay. I’m sorry this is happening. I’ll fix it.” Then he hung up.

The way he went about his life was so weird to me sometimes. Knowing him, he was back asleep already too. Sleeping sounded like a pretty good idea, actually. I knew I could never take a nap, it was something I had learned to deal with. I’d always wished I could just pass out like my boyfriend. He had this uncanny ability to simply close his eyes and be somewhere else.

I stood from the purple couch in my living room and walked the total 10 feet to my bedroom. I swung open the door and fell straight onto my bed. The phone charger I kept next to my bed was gone and then I just let out my anger by screaming. I didn’t give a fuck about my upstairs neighbor in this moment or the 5 open windows in the little apartment my mother and I stayed in.  I was just frustrated.

The plug had fallen on the floor off of my mattress, luckily. Once my phone was charging, I called up my best friend Alicia. She didn’t pick up and I knew she was also asleep. Of course two of the most important people in my life had these weird sleeping habits I couldn’t get myself into. I could barely sleep as it was, let alone throughout the day.

I called her again as fast as I could. Normally after the first phone call, she grabbed her phone to turn off the volume for the second call. I always begged her not to because if there was a second call it was important, but she didn’t give a shit. It was almost crazy to me how my boyfriend and best friend were so alike. I really couldn’t fathom how I could handle two of them let alone one, but I did it. I guess my type had changed.

I must have called fast enough because I was met with a groan and a, “Ugh, what do you need?”

“Hey,” I almost choked up? I wasn’t sad, just stressed. “Can we do something?”

“Guardians 2 just came out, if you can get us tickets.” Usually, I was met with a no and that she was going back to bed. “What’s wrong with you?”

I put my phone on speaker and opened up the Chrome browser, typing in showtimes near us. “Oh, you know. I’m just casually getting stalked.”

“Yeah? Well, that’s karma.”

“For what?!”

“Dating a superstar. A hot, lazy version of me though. Yeah. Karma.” she broke into a fit of chuckles and I heard her get up and start rummaging through her clothes. “Do I have to dress nice? Am I going to get followed by some paparazzi?” I could hear her trying not to laugh.

“I’m wearing jeans and a fucking hoodie. The next show time is in 40 minutes, I got us side seats. I’m coming to pick you up.” Then I hung up, grabbed my keys, and ran out my door.


The movie was amazing, but my phone call with Yoongi later was not. Halfway through the movie, I remembered that he had wanted to see it with me. Boy, I wasn’t ready for the angry rant I was about to get, but I stayed up til 2 am for it anyways.

“Hey, baby.” I could hear the smile in his voice. He was in the arena in whatever place he was in now, getting ready for his show. “How are you, what’d you do after our call last night? Or your day time.”

“I went to the movies with Ali-”

“No you didn’t.” Oh no. He interrupted me. He was onto me, he knew. “Are you kidding me? I planned the tour around us seeing this movie during my vacation days!” He was screaming now. I heard Hoseok in the background asking him to calm down and heard my precious boyfriend slapping him away. “You know what? I’m done.”

“Done? Dude, come on.”

“You’re fucking coming to Korea on the next flight and we’re seeing it together. You’re off from work anyways, I’m not taking no as an answer. Hoseok, please take my card and find her a flight. I’d do it, but she won’t pack anything that she needs if I hang up to look.”

He was right, sadly. For such a put together person I over packed unessential stuff no matter where I was going. Day trips, week trips, I packed my entire room up for those.  “Don’t make him book me a ticket. I can buy my own.”

He broke into a fit of laughter. “Shut up, no you can’t. I got you out of work, so let me compensate by paying. You also can’t argue with me because it’s done. Check your email.”

He was right, I couldn’t. The flight was in about 3 hours and I was an hour away from the airport, so I started to pack. He scolded me about packing 3 times the clothes I needed when it only a four day trip. They had three more shows left to end their tour and would be in the same area for all of them. So I didn’t have to feel guilty about more travel expenses and such like I always did.

Of course I knew he had the money to spend and such, but that was the thing. I didn’t want to be pampered by him at all times just because he could. I liked being able to support myself and not feeling like I was using him for his money. I was so in love with this kid and I had been for the last few years and that was the last thing I wanted him to believe.

Yeah, I was working a part time minimum wage job and he was touring the world, but I didn’t need him for such small expenses. Even though I guess a plane ticket wasn’t small. On the cab ride to JFK airport, I was just enveloped in my thoughts about him that I didn’t even realize when we had arrived. I was forced out of my head by a loud honk and the man in the front seat telling me to get out. I passed up a 50 dollar bill and grabbed my larger than I should have suit case out of the trunk.

I never really began going to airports and flying before Yoongi. It was such a normal thing to him, but to me it was so extravagant. Not even including where you’re going, flying on an airplane was just such a cool concept to me. So I took it all in every time. Even if it fucked me over in the end. Which you already knew it did. I never slept, so my jet lag was extra bad during these. I just watched movie after movie, every time. There was truly nothing else to do for me than take advantage of that. I got too anxious sleeping in front of people, even if they were perfectly good strangers.


Whenever my plane landed in South Korea, I always regretted not paying too much attention when Yoongi tried to teach me the language in depth. I knew some basic terms to get me around, but he had practiced English for so long and so hard for me, that I really did feel guilty for not learning his native tongue. It seemed to always be a lingering thought whenever I was in his homeland, but he made me feel silly for thinking that. Stating that I had no true reason to learn Korean and that he didn’t want me to get good at it so he could always talk shit about me without me truly understanding. As much as I wanted to believe that was a joke, I knew it wasn’t.

After grabbing my luggage, I looked around for one of the security guards I knew would be getting me. I pulled my hood lower on my head and looked for the sign that Yoongi probably wrote. Knowing him it would say something embarrassing.  There it was. Booboo buns. He even drew hearts around it. He was such a dick, even when he wasn’t here.

I gripped my rolling suitcase with a hard fist as I walked over to the burly man and waved. He complimented me with a smile and turned his back on me to follow to the car outside. He attempted to take my suitcase from me and I just responded with, “Aniyo gwaenchanhseubnida.” Meaning no thank you. One of the few terms I made sure to know along with where is the bathroom and a few other phrases.

Once I was in the familiar black van, I finally closed my eyes. I didn’t know how far the hotel was and I didn’t bother to ask. Well, I didn’t know how to ask and I had no service here to even text Yoongi I was on my way. He definitely knew though. For a lazy fuck he was on top of important shit; like getting me around a place where I could easily end up lost. As much as I prided myself on having good direction value.

Of course I didn’t sleep on the way to the hotel when that was purely all I wanted to do. The security guard parked the car in front of the hotel and left the hazards on. He simply walked me inside and I said thank you and he passed me a card with the room number and key. From the lack of people around here, I figured the boys were at their show. It was around 8 pm here now, so it was almost a perfect time for me to sleep.

I power walked to the elevator and once it dinged I went inside up to the 18th floor. I closed my eyes on the way up as I leaned against the mirror on the side of the elevator. I hope I didn’t leave a mark or anything. I was probably all gross from that plane ride. If I had the energy I’d shower, but I just wanted to knock out and I bet that the bed here was super comfortable. Nothing like my mattress on the floor back at home. Ding. I was here. Floor 18, room 22. Of course it was at the end of a long hallway. Of course.

At this point I was almost ready to crawl down the hallway, but instead I jogged. I figured I was alone, but I was wrong. During my sprint, I ran into random man and completely ate shit and fell. He said, “Sorry, sorry.” but continued running in the opposite direction of me. Awesome. Now I was tired and bruised and probably had fucking rug burn, but I was over it.  I stood up and just pushed the thought that I got to see Yoongi when I woke up. I swiped the card through room 22 and saw it. The beautiful, big bed. The door slammed behind me and I kicked off the moccasins I’d been wearing for the past almost 16 hours. A smile loomed over my face as I tiptoed over to the empty bed and stuffed myself into it. Within a minute, I was out like a light.


I was awoken by the light turning on, but the thing that pushed me into being awake was the stench that followed it. I coughed to clear my throat and sat up. I opened my eyes to a smiling Yoongi at the foot of the bed. My eyes were still adjusting to the change, so he was a little blurry to me. “Why didn’t you shower there?” I asked. It totally wasn’t the first thing I wanted to say, but I kind of hurt a bit too much to move or yell.

“I wanted to see my girl.” His smile turned into one of my favorites. The gummy one. Then he crawled over to me, rubbing his fingers across the dimple that lined my face. “You’re so pretty… and bloody?” He chuckled, “Did you fall or something?” He peeled the blanket off of me and I was as confused as the look on his face. “Oh, come on. You fell?”

I couldn’t help but to laugh. There were a bunch of scratches on my arm from the carpet that had torn just enough to bleed. Then I just ignored it, so here we were. “Yeah, I fell. I was super tired and ran into this guy-”

“Someone ran into you?” He pulled me into his smelly arms and squeezed me. “You didn’t yell at him? Shame. I love it when you’re a firecracker.” He kissed at my cheek, towards the corner of my mouth. “Wow, I missed you.”

He continued to leave small kisses around my face and I knew I wasn’t sleeping anytime soon. I turned around so that I was looking at him and he had changed his hair. “Green?” My face lit up, “You did my favorite hair color again?!”

He bit at my nose, “Yeah. I gotta make sure this vacation is perfect for you.” He went back to kissing around my face. Whenever we met up, it always started like this. He missed the physical interaction, but never pushed me into anything, He always started slow.

“How was the show?”

“Amazing, as always, but I was so distracted knowing you were here and laying in my bed without me.” His kisses began to trail down the side of my face to my neck, his second favorite place to be at for a while.

“Can we shower? I don’t want to fuck you- No, that’s a lie. I want to fuck you really bad.”

“Blunt today?” he breathed hot air down my neck as he spoke in a sexy whisper.

“I’m gross and so are you, let’s shower.”

We both walked into the bathroom and started stripping each other. Nothing too sensual at first, until we were both in our undergarments. We both just looked at each other for a minute. Observed each other’s flaws and imperfections as if it was the first time seeing each other naked, but boy was it not. Honestly, I think that’s what made us love each other so much. Everything was always the same, but it was always new.

“God, I’ve missed you so much.” Yoongi breathed. He undid the clasp on my bra and as I took that off I felt his long fingers slide down my back to pull down my lacy panties I’d been in for probably the last day. I breathed out a gasped when he touched me. His fingers were cold even though the bathroom was slowly heating up. I pulled on the waistline of Yoongi’s boxers, suggesting for him to take them off. Even if we were caught in a moment, he couldn’t help but to slightly laugh at my little motions. I was never truly the one in charge of these situations, but considering it’s been about 3 months since we’d last seen each other, I was getting a little antsy.

He grabbed onto my hand and led me into the shower. As soon as I turned the shower on he started attacking my neck with little kisses. Nothing too aggressive, but hard enough to leave a faint bruise after each kiss. I turned around to face him. God, he was beautiful. We moved closer to each other and our lips finally connected. The kiss was soft and sweet. Then of course leave it to Yoongi become aggressive. With one swift motion, he lifted me off of the ground and made me wrap my legs around him. He pushed me into the tiled wall and I could feel him against my heat.

“You came all this way for me, I figured I might as well do something for you.” He said.

“That’s fine by me, daddy.” I teased. I could feel him fucking harden against me. It was really hot. I knew it was one of his kinks. He would never admit it to me but whenever I called him that it would almost instantaneously turn him on. Now that I did that, I knew I was in for a world of trouble. Aka, him getting mad if I called him anything other than that or sir. I did it anyways, him being mad was pretty hot in these cases.

“Yeah?” his voice was raspier now.

“Okay, Yoongi.” I smirked, excited for the outcome.

“Don’t you dare call me that now. You started this,” Yoongi growled. He let me sink a little bit again the wall, only to duck his shoulder under my left leg and put it on top. My breathing hitched as he got me into one of his favorite positions. Also because this was dangerous. We could die. Then it would be all my fault and his army would kill me.

I was taken back to the moment as he kitten licked up my slit and pulled away right before he got to my clit. He chuckled at the little gasping noise I made when he stopped and lifted up to touch me, but instead of going where I thought he cupped my chin. He smirked and kissed me so hard that I could almost feel the purple that my lip was going to be. He let go of my chin and began to lazily trail his hand down my body, making sure to go over my most sensitive parts in his little teasing session.

His eyes never left yours as he teased a digit inside, but quickly pulled it out. Before he started anything else he made sure I was secure against the wall and in his left hand. He did the same motion again with his middle finger and I gasped as the loss of touch.

“Please-” I begged, reaching for his wrist.

He slapped my hand away and squinted his eyes at me telling me to stop. This time he put in two fingers and curled them inside of me, my eyes closed from habit.  “I want you to look at me while I touch you, princess.” He scolded. I could literally feel my insides turn to mush with his words as I bit onto my lip. His two fingers slowly moved inside of me while his thumb reached up to rub my clit. He kept curling and uncurling his fingers while rubbing little circles. All I wanted right now was to moan loud and sink to my knees, but I couldn’t lose my voice yet and I was pinned to the shower.

At this point he lowered me onto the ground, still keeping my leg on his shoulder. I gripped the shower handle as he moved his mouth onto my clit, lightly sucking on it while keeping his fingers inside of me. I wrapped my leg over my shoulder. He added a third finger and continued to curl them. I reached my other hand out and ran my fingers through his hair, being careful not to pull the green too hard. I pushed my hips down and mumbled a fuck. He hummed into me as he removed his fingers and licked up me one final time.

He pulled his fingers into his mouth, sucking on them while not breaking eye contact. “Better than ever.” He let my leg down and I still needed some support. I reached my arms up lazily and wrapped them around his neck, kissing him softly. He, however, didn’t want soft. The kiss quickly became intense as he slipped his tongue into my mouth. He ran his hands up and down my back, eventually landing on my ass and gripped it like he was holding on for dear life.

The kissing stopped for a moment. “Are you sure you don’t want me to-” I pulled one arm off of him and brought it toward his hip. He reached out for it with his own, lacing our fingers together. It felt less intense in this moment, as he smiled purely and took his other hand to my cheek.

“Let me take care of you for once. Let me fuck you til you beg me to stop, (Y/N).” He spoke in is normal voice, except a little bit higher. I simply bit my lip in response. Leave it to Yoongi to always know what to say to make me wet.

He lifted my leg back up again and placed himself at my entrance. In typical Yoongi fashion, he rubbed the head up and down my folds, barely dipping inside. “Please.” I begged, barely audible. He just smiled and slowly pushed into me. Within seconds, he picked up speed. He went at a mild tempo at first then as I put my hand onto his shoulder he lifted my leg higher and all you could hear was muffled moans and groans along with the slapping of skin.

He gripped my thigh as he thrusted in and out. He never broke eye contact with me and as much as I wanted to close my eyes, I stared right at him. When I reached my high, he knew. I knew he was close too. “Can I?” his eyes darted down to his cock. I nodded as I was unable to even speak. He fucked me right through my orgasm and my nails scratched through his skin. As soon as I was done, he moaned out my name as he came inside me. He lowered my leg to a more comfortable position and then pulled out.

Before putting me back onto the ground he made sure I was leaning on him and had my hand somewhere else. Fuck, he knew me too well. He hummed into my ear as my back leaned against his bare body. He ran his fingers through my hair and I felt a stinging in my eye. “Yoongi stop!” I yelled, squeezing it shut to try to comfort my pain.

“What’s wrong? Was I being too aggressive? I know it’s been a bit and I know you can barely walk right now but maybe y-”

“No, it’s not that-”

“Then what’s wrong?” He wrapped his arms around me, turning me in towards him.

“You got shampoo in my eye.”

He gulped. “I wasn’t holding the shampoo-”

“Then what’s in my eye?!” I yelled, reaching one hand up to rub it. He started to laugh.

“Babe, I am so sorry.”

For the rest of the shower, I just leaned into him after getting whatever was in my eye out. I missed being with him like this in such a personal way. We didn’t even speak, but we were so in tune with each other when we were together. He took care of me and I took care of him. In this moment, it was his turn. He knew I’d been hurting lately, mentally and now physically thanks to him. It was moments like these I was so grateful for him. I was always grateful for him.

He reached over me to turn off the water and pulled a towel off of the rack outside of it. He twirled it around me and then one around his own waist. He kept one arm around me as he patted some of the water off of himself. “You tired?” He whispered, patting me down a little bit before lifting me bridal style out of the shower.

He laid me onto the bed still wrapped up despite me still being well covered in water. He got in next to me and covered us with the warm blanket, pulling me close to his chest. He liked to sleep while in contact with me, despite what it may be. Tonight his arm was around me, but most nights his hand was on my hip or thigh . Tonight was different, he wanted to closer than usual. We which we already were. Our usual is across the world.

“Hey, Yoongs.” I whispered into his chest. He made a noise signaling he heard me. “I love you. I love you. I’m so in love with you.”

He ruffled my hair. “Shh, go to sleep.”

“Reassure me.” my unnecessary anxiety spoke out.

“I’m so in love with you. I’ve loved you since I’ve known you. You’re the strongest woman I know. You’re my sun and I love you. Darling, am I in love with you.”


Authors Note: Hey! I hope you enjoyed chapter 1 of Pressure! If you guys liked it, I’d appreciate if you let me know! I have lots of plans for this and would love to continue writing it! Thank you guys.


part 2 →

Title: The Small Stuff
Character: Shaun Murphy
A/n: This could technically count this as a part two for the last shaun story, but honestly i just wanted to write more for this bean and i didn’t wanna come up with a whole other background just yet.

It was still raining whenever your shift at the hospital ended, the sky had darkened but even still you could see the spindly patterns of rain tracks on the windows, and hear the soft roll of thunder from outside.

Stoping by your locker to put back on your street clothes never took you much time, back at med school your party trick was to be able to execute perfect quick changes.

But when you walked to the main doors of the building, a hair tie hanging loosely between your teeth as you gathered your hair into some sort of pile at the back of your head, you were somewhat surprised to see Shaun already standing there, just staring out at the parking lot.

Quickly, you twisted your tie around the mass of hair you had collected, and started to make your way over to him.

You were able to catch glances of him throughout most of the day, but they were never long enough for you to stop and say hello or even give him a simple smile of acknowledgement.

But, you had noticed that whenever he walked, it was almost with perfect posture and calculated steps, as if he was mentally graphing out his entire route wherever he went, and he never looked lost.

Which in retrospect was pretty impressive considering it was his first day here. You’d been at San Jose for a considerable amount of time, and sometimes you still forgot where certain places were.

He also almost always had his hands clasped together at his stomach, and even now as he stood facing away from you, you could tell by the positioning of his arms, he was doing it.

“Hello, Dr. Murphy.” You placed your hands into the pockets of your jeans and nodded at him when he turned.

“Hello,” Shaun replied, giving you a small smile when you met gazes before he looked down again. “Why do you call me that?”

“Call you what?”

“Dr. Murphy, you called me Shaun when you first learned my name.”

You blinked, thinking it was obvious to call him that in a professional setting. “I just assumed, because we haven’t known each other very long, you’d prefer to be called by that.”

“But we’re not working.”

That got a smile out of you. “Hello, Shaun.”

“Hello, (Y/n).” He said, his tone was lighter now.

“How was your first day?”

“Uneventful, Dr. Melendez has me on suction from now till eternity, so I suppose that’s something.” Shaun answered, ruffling up his hair.

You laughed. “At least you have a sense of humor.”

Shaun looked at you, brows tilted towards each other ever so slightly. “No one ever usually says that about me.”

“Really?” You asked, only to have him nod. “Are you heading out soon?” You deterred, deciding it was a bit early in your relationship to go digging into his personal history.

“Yes, I still have a bit of time to spare though, and I’d rather be here anyways.”

You nodded, taking a short moment to search through your bag. “You know, earlier I noticed that you were all wet from the rain, and it just so happens that I always carry a spare.”

“Why would someone need more than one umbrella?”

You couldn’t help but chuckle. “I sort of collect them, oddly enough,” You said, plucking the one you used earlier to show him. “I have a whole bunch at my place.”

Shaun looked down at your already outstretched hand, taking the umbrella from you and running his one thumb over the nylon taffeta of the cover. “I like this color.”

It was a dark blue, just a shade or two above navy.

“I agree, I used that one all the time when I first got it, just because I thought it looked pretty.”

Shaun looked up at you, his hand hadn’t moved from it’s outstretched postion. “When should I give it back to you?”

“Keep it, consider it a welcoming present.”

Shaun brought his hand back, both his hands now pressing into the material. “Thank you.”

“It’s not a problem,” You replied before heaving a sigh. “Anyways, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Can I ask you something before you go?” He said before you could get too far, continuing when you gave him a nod.

“How come you helped me earlier? I thought about it a lot today, and I never gave you a convincing reason. I could have just been some crazy person looking to steal painkillers or something.”

“Well, did you steal any painkillers?”

Shaun looked like he was debating whether you were serious or not and then shook his head.

“No.”

You laughed and Shaun was beginning to notice that you laughed a lot. When he saw you talking with the other doctors, were usually laughing, or smiling as if you were about to.

He wondered how someone could seem so happy all the time.

“Call it a leap of faith, you seemed trustworthy so I trusted you,” You explained with a small shrug. “Turns out it was a good call.”

Shaun nodded, seemingly satisfied with your response. “You managed to remember that I didn’t have an umbrella earlier,” He called out to you while you were walking to the door. “And you thought I was the observant one.“

Then came your laugh again.

“See? There’s that sense of humor.”

I can’t stop thinking about how Diana and the others wanted Charlie to stay even though his mental illness kept him from doing his job

“We can’t always be what we want all the time” just fuck me up

They wanted him to stay because he was still valuable just by existing, even if he couldn’t perform or help in the way he was meant to

This is the first time I’ve seen a superhero movie where someone failed when they were needed and couldn’t help or save the day and it was because of mental illness and the other characters acted like it was okay, it was OKAY to mess up and it’s okay if your best isn’t good enough and they were still supportive and they didn’t get angry or frustrated that he couldn’t do it, they just let life go on and they still acted like he was important and they needed him to be there because failing didn’t make him LESSER, mental illness didn’t make him LESSER.

Just one of the many, many things in Wonder Woman that makes it revolutionary

prompt #2, #29, #38 (Brett Talbot)

2.“don’t go I can’t be alone.” 29.“the problem is, if I kiss you, I don’t know that i’d be able to stop.” 38.“wow that was deep, like deeper than the pacific.” Requested by @wckedheart

Originally posted by teenwolf--imagines

“what do you guys think you’re doing?” My new friend Liam Dunbar asked me and our other friend Mason.

“me? i’m agreeing with you, i’m being agreeable.” Mason said his eyes not leaving number 28 on the opposing team.

“I’m gawking.” I said honestly.

Brett Talbot was everything your parents warned you about, he was hot with an attitude. A bad boy, and he played the part very well. 

“you think he’s hot don’t you?” Liam said disgustedly.

“no, no of course not.” Mason said looking at Liam.

“yes.” I said quickly.

“He wants to break me in half.” Liam said looking at the beautiful boy now too.

“please like he could.” I scoffed.

I wasn’t talking about Brett’s fighting abilities or stroking Liam’s ego, I was talking about the fact that Liam was a werewolf. I being Stiles little sister got him to trust me. Mason and Liam were talking but something else caught my attention. It was Garrett, and I could’ve swore he was looking at Brett. I ran over to the Devenford Prep side earning confused glances from Mason and Liam. Brett looked utterly confused when I came up to him.

“hi uh you don’t know me but I have a question.” I started looking at the tall boy.

He looked even more handsome up close if that was even possible.

“uh what?” He asked confused.

I turned around and Garrett was definitely glaring now. I could feel myself getting more nervous by the second. Garrett was a assassin and I had a feeling he was going to go after Liam tonight. I think Brett might be in on it.

“are you okay?” Brett asked turning me around so I was looking at him.

“no, uh just a silly question, you’ve never killed anyone for money have you?”

As soon as the words left my lips I rolled my eyes. I seriously did not just ask him that. Brett started to laugh.

“you’re cute.” He said laughing.

“so is that a yes, or..”

“no I’ve never killed anyone for money.” He said laughing again.

I could feel the heat rush to my cheeks as I walked away. Liam ran up to me giving me a really confused look.

“he’s never killed anyone for money.” I said shrugging my shoulders.

“why would you think he has?” Liam said looking at me like I was crazy.

Scott and I both thought Liam was the one he was after, but we didn’t tell him that. Liam wasn’t even on the list yet, but he would be and we all knew it. Lydia just needed to crack the next part of the list.

“no reason, now go out there and kick butt!” I said patting him on the shoulder.

I walked to the bleachers sitting down. I saw Violet in the stands laughing and talking to her friends like she wasn’t some psychotic nut job. The game started and Brett wasn’t taking it easy on Liam. I didn’t blame him, Liam did have some anger issues. I kept my eyes on Garrett the entire time. That’s when it happened. Garrett crashed into Liam and Brett. Brett was groaning on the field and was taken away by paramedics. I figured Liam used his werewolf strength on Brett. I looked back to check on Violet but she was gone. I ran up to where her friends were sitting.

“hey where did Violet go, I uh have something that belongs to her.” I asked forcing the fakest smile I could manage.

“she went to the bathroom, she’ll be right back.” Her friend said rolling her eyes at me.

I ran a fast as I could into the school. Liam was never the target of tonight, it was Brett. That’s why Garrett was looking at him, Brett was a supernatural creature, and Violet was going to kill him. I walked in seeing the bodies of the paramedics on the floor. I ran in the boys locker room where Brett was laying on the floor groaning in pain.

“Brett are you okay?” I asked going over and dropping down next to him.

Brett looked behind me with wide eyes. I felt something hard hit the back of my head. I could feel my vision start to get cloudy.

“what did you do to me?” Brett asked trying to get away.

Originally posted by lildoog-ish

“It’s a rare form of wolfsbane, it won’t kill you, but this will.” Violet said snapping her necklace to reveal the thermo cut wire.

She kicked Brett down so he couldn’t get away. All I could do was sit there helplessly as Violet was about to kill him.

“you’re worth a lot of money Brett.” She said wrapping the wire around his neck.

Brett’s screams of pain were the last thing I heard before my vision went black. I woke up later to someone shaking me.

“y/n wake up!” I heard a voice say.

I opened my eyes to see Scott leaning over me.

“are you okay?” Scott asked helping me sit up.

I looked behind him seeing Violet.

“Scott watch out!” I screamed.

Violet wrapped the wire around his neck pulling.

“Garrett insisted we go after the beta but why not the alpha.” She said pulling tighter.

Scott flashed his alpha eyes pulling at the wire around his neck. He turns around growling at Violet, throwing her into the wall. That was when Brett started to violently shake.

“we have to get him to Deaton’s!” I said trying to help Brett.

Derek and Stiles rushed in the locker room picking up Brett.

“you guys go, I’ll talk to the cops and make sure Violet doesn’t go anywhere.” Scott said looking at the knocked out girl.

Derek drove while Stiles and I sat in the back with Brett. Brett was still shaking violently.

“Derek you need to hurry!” I yelled trying to hold Brett.

We arrived at Deaton’s jumping out of the car. Now Brett was foaming yellow stuff out of his mouth. We lay him on Deaton’s table trying to control his convulsing.

“what the hell is wrong with this kid?” Stiles asked struggling to hold him.

“wolfsbane, she poisoned him.” I told Deaton walking over to his tools with him.

“alright we’ll have to cut him open for the poison to get out, but you need to hold him still or the incision could kill him.” Deaton said grabbing a scalpel.

“yeah Derek how about some werewolf strength?” Stiles said losing his grip on Brett.

“in case you haven’t noticed, I’m not the only one with werewolf strength here.” Derek growled.

“hold him still!” Deaton yelled bringing the scalpel closer to his chest.

“I can’t, he’s slipping!” Stiles yelled losing his grip on Brett.

Brett got up sending Derek, Stiles, and Deaton to the floor.

“Brett Stop!” I screamed.

He stopped, looking at me. He turned back around to run but Peter punched him in the face knocking him out. Deaton and I ran over to him. I held his hand while Deaton cut his chest open, releasing a cloud of yellow smoke.

“will he be okay?” I asked stroking his hair.

“yeah he’ll be out for awhile though.” Deaton said helping Stiles pick him up.

We sat him back on the exam table.

“we need to go find Scott.” Stiles said gesturing to me and Derek.“

"you guys go, he should have someone to explain all this when he wakes up. I said pulling up a chair to sit beside him.

Stiles and Derek left leaving me alone with an unconscious Brett. I put my head down on the table still feeling a little woozy from getting hit. I slowly felt my eyes fluttering shut. I woke up to Brett jolting up off the table.

"what happened to me?” He asked panicking.

“Brett look at me, you’re going to be okay. Just sit down and we’ll talk about everything.” I said grabbing his hand.

He let me take him back to the table to sit down. He didn’t let go of my hand though. I explained everything to him, about the deadpool, the assassins, everything that we have figured out so far.

“so somebody is killing us for money?” He asked looking in my eyes.

I shook my head giving him a moment to take in everything.

“i’m going to get Deaton.” I said hopping off the table.

Brett quickly pulled me back to him.

don’t go, I can’t be alone.” He said pulling me in his arms.

“of course i’ll stay, Brett someone just tried to kill you for a million dollars.” I said wrapping my arms around him too.

“Wait, i’m worth a million dollars?” He said looking up to meet my eyes.

“yep, a million, you must be special.” I said laughing at the look he gave me.

wow y/n that was deep, like deeper than the pacific.” He said laughing.

“I’m just telling you what I see.” I said smiling at him.

I didn’t realize we were still wrapped in each others arms.

“are you okay?” I asked looking down at him.

“I will be.”

We were just looking at each other. I saw Brett looking at my lips, so I started to lean down resting my lips on top of his, but Brett pulled away.

“is there a problem?” I asked pulling away looking at him.

the problem is, if I kiss you, I don’t know that I’d be able to stop.” Brett said smirking.

I bent down putting my lips on his. He stood up so he was now leaning down to kiss me.

Originally posted by pleasingpics

“you’re cute.” He said once he pulled away.

I could hear someone clearing their throat. I looked over at my brother Stiles, knowing that he fully saw what just happened.

“and I’m dead.” I chuckled grabbing Brett’s hand and preparing to face the wrath of my brother.

prompt from: https://radwriting.tumblr.com/post/161065686187/teen-wolf-imagine-prompts

so I want to explain how I do my requests. I try to do them in order of when they were requested but with dialogue prompts you have to think about the context in which the characters are saying those things and the events that lead up to them. When making my prompts it’s easier to put certain lines with certain characters so sometimes I have to really think about the writing piece. I promise i’m not forgetting about you if I haven’t done yours yet, it just means you’re challenging my writing and that’s cool because it gives me room to expand! Thank you for over 200 followers!

xoxoxox

“What’s wrong with you?”

I. Sometimes I watch the light leave my eight year old cousin’s eyes. He gets so silent. I watch him turn into me. I try to reassure him that he can speak, reassure him that he can trust me, but he just shrugs and sits still. How do I protect him from the inevitable?

II. My best friend got her heart broken by someone that shares the same birthday as me and I feel as though it’s my fault. That I have to leave her because I’m a constant reminder of the person that hurt her.

III. My mother dearest always exclaims, “you need help!” in front of my family members to embarrass me. As though I’m not in therapy, on mood stabilizers and antipsychotics. Then she acts as though I’m a burden on her shoulders, throwing my diagnosis back in my face. I don’t want to live with her anymore. She drives me to do things. She never listens and she will push me over the edge.

IV. Life doesn’t appeal to me. It doesn’t feel as though it’s my destiny. I’m a missing piece trying to fit in places I don’t belong. It’s so easy to be lonely in this lifetime. So easy to be surrounded and still feel alone.

V. I don’t believe in much, but I’m trying. Maybe I’ll find a purpose in religion, but I only ever lose myself further. I’m trying to find happiness in a body, at the bottom of a bottle, in a higher power, but I always come up empty.

“Nothing. Absolutely nothing.”

Will Solace Headcanons

mostly because i love my sun

  • Will has most of his freckles on his back and shoulders
  • His favorite album is Vessel from twenty one pilots (big ukulele sucker)
  • He only wears flip flops or hightops there is no in between
  • Refuses to believe he is sick
  • Will *with a fever, runny nose, and about thirty seconds away from throwing up*: What are you talking about, I am the healthiest person at this camp, I can work today just let me vomit in the trash can really quick
  • Also refuses to believe that he is injured
  • for example one time he got this really bad gash on his stomach during a battle and he worked so hard trying to heal other people he didn’t think about healing himself
  • People noticed he was hurt when he started to bleed though his shirt and his hastily applied bandages
  • It took three Ares kids to hold him down and two other Apollo kids to stitch him back up because he kept struggling because people still needed to be healed and ‘I AM THE EPITOME OF GOOD HEALTH GUYS JUST LET ME GO!!!’
  • His lips get really chapped very easily and it doesn’t help that he’s constantly licking them and biting off the skin as he works
  • Sneezes when he lies
  • The first real time Nico caught his eye was during the Battle of Manhattan. When Will was trying to help someone that was injured get to safety, and he ended up tripping and a monster stood over him ready to kill Will but all of the sudden a skeleton warrior kills the monster. Out of the corner of his eye he sees this scrawny kid, that radiated power, and despite the fighting, he didn’t look a bit afraid as he ordered the skeletons around, if anything he looked proud about what he had done. Will owed his life to Nico, and was smitten ever since.
  • Only starts dating Nico awhile after his dad turns into a teenager (Apollo ships it more than anyone, has written 15 haikus about their first date plus three different songs)
  • Doesn’t believe is lost causes
  • he will try to save someone even if they are long gone, because if they do die he wants them to die knowing that he never gave up on them
  • My personal favorite is;
  • Will was always self conscious about how he couldn’t fight as well as his siblings and was only good at healing so Apollo blessed him and gave him the power to absorb peoples pain, and fill them with good memories and hope
  • It works for physical and emotional pain
  • the problem is that Will has to absorb the pain that he takes so he will constantly feel waves of heartbreak and hopelessness, He will feel stab wounds that aren’t there for hours, he goes to bed with his bones on fire, and feels like his blood is boiling due to poison that isn’t running through his blood
  • He hasn’t told anyone about this blessing, not even to his siblings or to Nico
  • He can also absorb anger, because all anger comes from some sort of pain
  • But he takes peoples pain with a smile, because as long as he is doing something to help he will do anything, no matter how much it may hurt
8

LOIS:  Look, Clark, I know that I got a little thorny when you raised the red flag on A.C.
CLARK:  I was just trying to look out for you.
LOIS:  And I appreciate it.  I’ve just never had someone to help guide me through the shark-infested ocean of romance. … Not that I can’t fend for myself.
CLARK:  You know, I think I was wrong about our friend A.C.

It’s so painful to admire a celebrity and have nobody else around you understand the relationship you have with that person. Even though I haven’t met them, there’s still a connection. Their music gets me through the day and my dedication helps their career and we are both grateful. To people around me it just seems “stupid” and I need to “get a life”. Yes, I understand they don’t personally know who I am, but it’s nice to have a person out there that you can look up to and be proud of for their success. i’m so sick of people judging my love for someone famous, as if it’s childish and useless. If it makes me happy then why should it be a problem? I’ve chosen to look up to someone who adores and appreciates everything their fans do for them. I think I couldn’t have made a better choice actually, I will stand by this person no matter what, no one can change that. Why can’t people just have a little respect rather than degrading such a nice thing?

Confession

Genre: Fluff

Pairing: Jin X Reader

Fandom: BTS

Summary/Request:  the reader has had a crush on Jin for ages and just never told him - but she goes out of her way to help him out with stuff. In this instances, helping him prepare a buttload of food for a party even though she’s not the greatest cook and accident prone

Originally posted by 1oyalty

——Group Text: Bangtan Babies——-

3:12 P.M. 

Jiminie: Y/N~ 

TaeTae: She stopped responding to us…

Nams: She’s probably getting ready since she’s coming over to see Jin for the party. 

Jiminie: Hmm. probably. Do you think she’s gonna do it?

Hobi: I’m rooting for you ,Y/N!

Yoongs: You guys are so noisy, she’s probably ignoring the group chat

Taehyung: Like Jungkook?

Jimin: Why does that brat never come in here..

The cute ringtone began to lose it’s charm after the millionth time it had gone off in the short time you were trying to get dressed. You stopped to stare at yourself in the mirror, looking at the outfit you had specially picked for tonight. Taking a deep breath you couldn’t help but wonder if this was the right thing to do, but if the boys were encouraging it then you assumed it was a good sign. Today, 4 years ago, was the day you and Jin had first met. You hadn’t planned to tell him how you felt at a party but the timing felt right. It wasn’t like you would be completely devastated either, since you were happy enough to have him and the rest of them smiling around you. Something had just changed in you and you figured you had owed it to yourself to at least be honest with him.The whole group was stoked about the new comeback, along with the newly broken records, and although they were tired, they agreed to the staff members they would invite them over as a thank you. 

As you grabbed your things to leave your place, you were able to read up on the group chat you had missed before. You couldn’t help but laugh at their undeniably chaotic messages.

——Group Text: Bangtan Babies——-

3:37

You: Well i’m on my way to help cook for the party so i’ll see all of you dorks soon.

Nams: …Y/n…Cooking..?

Hobi: This is the power of love

TaeTae: Ah this party is going to be a mess-

You: wtf i’m not even that bad!

Jiminie: Maybe we were a bad influence…

Nams: I thought we agreed for the better of the world we would both stay as far away from the kitchen as possible.

TaeTae: The world is ending!!

Hobi: ???

Jiminie: lmao

You: Alright, Alright you can stop. I’m here already so one of you answer the door.

Yoongs: on it

Hobi: You were still reading the messages? Ah, you really do just ignore us

Yoongi looked you up and down as he stood in the familiar dorm doorway. You got a glimpse of the smile he was trying to hide. Your eyes narrowed in on him, following behind him as he lead you to the kitchen.

“What?”

“Hmm? Nothing, nothing.” Yoongi assured, gesturing his arm towards the door before heading off back to his room.

You pushed open the door to find Jin with his back towards you while he was trying to read the recipe out of the book, apron wrapped neatly around his figure. It instantly brought a smile to your face. 

“Your assistant is here!” You called, forgetting how childishly scared he got.

Jin’s shoulders flinched, turning around so fast it almost scared you. When he realized who it was, he tried to calm down, placing his hand over his chest. 

“God, you scared me..”

“Sorry…I’m a little late too.”

He shrugged, going over to the closet, pulling out an apron for you. 

“It’s okay, this stuff can be prepared pretty easily so we don’t need as much time as I figure.” He assured. 

You reached your hands out for it but he ignored them, going behind you. Feeling his figure hovering behind you felt safe in a strange way but you knew it was connected to the romantic feelings for him that you had been hiding. You wished he’d just wrap his arms around you instead, putting his face right in the crook of your neck comfortably-

“Can you lift your hair up for me?” Jin asked.

“Huh?- oh! Yeah, sure.”

As you did as told, his arms draped the cloth over you, putting your head through the loop. He smiled, tying the strings further down on your back.

“What did you think of the MV? I’m pretty cool, huh?”

“Yeah, I guess.” 

The sound of  Jin’s fake annoyed scoff from behind you was followed with him laughing at your odd answer. It was so easy to mess with him.

“You guess? What does that mean? I was the most handsome one in that mv!”

You snorted at his immaturity. 

“I know. I know. You’re the most handsome guy in the whole world. You’re the coolest! Oh my god, I can’t even believe i’m standing next to someone like you. Please, go easy on those less fortunate than you!” You joked.

Jin cracked a real smile again, turning you around. 

“Should I?”

Suddenly you felt yourself staring at his eyes for too long, taking in the moments you had missed for so long. They were so busy you didn’t see them much lately and you weren’t sure if this was really the time to tell him. Although, the thought of him going off and finding someone else sometimes soon was a painful one. If you didn’t do it today, who knows who could steal him away from you. He stood directly in front of you but he still felt so far away. 

It seems as though he noticed you no longer playing around, looking at you more seriously. His eyes shifted down to linger at your lips for a split second but the moment slipped through your fingers as new words escaped his lips.

“You ready to help me?”

“Okay, what do you need me to do?”

Walking over to the counter he had everything already laying out for the two of you, sorted by each thing he had planned out for the two of you. If the members knew you couldn’t cook you had no idea how it had slipped past Jin so easily.

“Well, for now I already preheated the oven but I need you to get me some eggs from the fridge while I start on this. After that you can help pick which flavor you want to make from these choices.”

With a nod you were already racing towards the fridge,grabbing the handle with no caution whatsoever, and pulling it open to find what you had been asked of. When you felt your phone vibrate in your pocket you tried to hold the carton of eggs in one hand, the other pulling your phone out to check your messages. As if gravity had a personal grudge against you, you felt the carton slip from your arms and practically splattering all over the floor and your socks. 

Jin’s shoulder flinched again as he heard the loud noise, looking over at you. 

“Ah….Y/N. Now what are we going to do? You and Namjoon seriously are way too alike.”

“Shit. Sorry, i’ll clean it up.” Grabbing paper towels you started to clean up your mess but as you reached up for a second one the whole roll moved the bowl in front of it off the table completely, letting more ingredients fall to the tile flooring. Jin just sighed, coming over to you.

“Now everything is on the floor! It’s okay, I’ll clean this up. Do you think you could run to the store for me to buy new stuff? You don’t have to pay for it, here. Just come back quickly, okay?”

You felt so dumb for knocking everything over and you now knew how Namjoon must have felt when he continuously broke things around everyone. Especially today of all days you had to act like this in front of him.

“Yeah, sure. I’m sorry-…I’ll just go. I’ll be back!” You called after yourself, running out of the house to instantly open your phone.

——Group Text: Bangtan Babies——-

4:58 P.M

You: Wow okay, I fucked everything up.

Hobi: What happened?

You: Well, I spilled half of everything on the floor, annoyed him twice, and I think I made him uncomfortable earlier. This is a mess…

Jiminie: He gets annoyed about everything

TaeTae: Yeah, he’s old

Nams: I’m sure it wasn’t that bad, Y/N

Yoongs: What did you do to make him uncomfortable??

You: I think I was staring a little…but he just changed the subject completely 

Hobi: Want me to go to the kitchen to talk to him?

You: no! It’s fine. i’ll just fix it and buy everything

Hobi: Whatever you say

As you were walking back to the dorms you felt your phone go off once more and you wondered what more did they have to say, wondering if it concerned you. You slid the bags of groceries down your arms so you were able to read your phone properly.

——Group Text: The seven dorks——-

Nochu: whoa, Y/N is going to tell Jin finally?? He needed a girlfriend anyway, he needs to get married soon lmao

Jiminie: …….Wrong group chat….

Nochu: Oh shit… 

Nams: You can’t hear it but I sighed just now

Taetae: The one time you show up in these things and this is what you contribute? At least it wasn’t me lol

Your eyes scanned over Jimin’s reply, stopping you in your place. You clicked the group chat that included Jin and the one without, trying to come to terms with this reality. If you could hurry back in time maybe Jin wouldn’t be able to read it and as you started to run towards the dorm, you tried to come up with some sort of plan to explain if he did already read it. It took minutes for you to come racing back and ringing the doorbell.

Right when Jimin opened the door for you, you ran past him and back into the kitchen. Breathless,you set the groceries onto the table to find Jin still reading through his cook book. You weren’t able to tell if he had read the messages yet, having him look up at you from the counter.

“You’re back. That was fast.”

“Yeah, well I didn’t want you to have to wait on me for too long, haha..-”

Casually he just nodded in response, coming over to check the foods you had brought back for him. You followed behind him, not realizing how close you were standing to him until he turned around to face you.

“Oh, did you get change?”

“Huh? Oh, right. Here.” You fished the change back out of your pockets and into his hand. 

“And. uh. I am really sorry about ruining everything before. To be honest, I’m not the best at cooking and I’m a little clumsy.”

Jin titled his head, smiling at you in an amused sort of way. 

“Then why would you offer to help?”

“W-well, It’s been a while since i’ve seen you guys and I wanted to hang out more.”

He put his thumb under your chin, holding your face gently in front of him.

“All of us or just me? I don’t see you visiting the others while you’re here. It’s okay,I know you missed me the most.” Jin laughed, sounding proud of himself as if he considered what he just said as cool. 

Even you rolled your eyes, knowing he’s just messing with you. 

“Yup, i’m going to go play something with Taehyung-”

“Oh come on, I was kidding! I missed you too.”

The words had you locked in, but Jin was just focused on continuing his plan for the party as he kept cooking and preparing everything. You walked over to sit on the countertop to watch him, noticing his phone next to your hand. You tried your best not to gain his attention. 

“Yeah, I’m sure you did, i’m pretty cool to hang out with you know.” You added, reaching your hand over to press the home button on his phone.

It felt as though your heart dropped, seeing he had no notifications for the messages, telling you that he had already read through them. Your face was instantly blushing and you nervously couldn’t even look in his direction anymore. So focused on what he might have been thinking when he read it, you didn’t even hear him ask you a question. 

“Y/N? Did you hear me?”

He noticed your different expression and the deer in the headlights look you had going on. 

“What’s wrong?”

He must have not mentioned it when you walked in because he was hoping you wouldn’t bring it up either. Maybe he was hoping you wouldn’t say it because he didn’t feel the same and didn’t want to let you down. The negative possibilities easily started to out weight their opponents as you felt your own tears hitting your legs underneath you. 

“I-I’m sorry, I think I forgot something at the store-”

Before you could slid off of the countertop, Jin stopped you, putting his hands on both sides of you.

“Wait, talk to me. What’s wrong? Did I hurt your feelings earlier? I wasn’t mad or anything.”

“It’s nothing, I’m sorry.I don’t even know why I started crying. I’m fine, really.” You said as you tried to quickly wipe the tears from your cheeks, feeling even more like an idiot. 

“Is it because Jungkook ruined it?” He asked, moving his head in front of your gaze so he was able to fully look at you.

Hearing him acknowledge it struck you in surprise as you could only look back at him. You shook your head.

“You would have known either way and maybe this was better. I don’t have to hear you tell me that you don’t like me back but at least I got my answer. As long as we’re still friends, it’s okay, right?”

“You wouldn’t have heard it anyway. Am I that bad at flirting?”

“By flirting did you mean, hand kisses and winks that you give you everyone?”

Jin nodded, knowing you were right, trying to come up with something that would prove how much he likes you more than everyone else.

“But wait did you mean-”

“How about a real kiss?” He suggested, making you a blushing mess once more.

He hands were already propped up on the sides of you and his face was only inches away from yours. The thought of it already had your heart pounding in your chest, feeling your hands clench. 

“-…that you like me?”

Jin’s handsome smile appeared again as he watched you stiffen in front of him at the words. Even for him it was too cheesy of an atmosphere and he turned his head away from you to snicker. You took notice to how red his ears were, knowing he’s practically all talk. He faced you again, trying to shake off his own nervousness.

You felt his fingers slip past your hair, grazing your neck until he held it gently to pull you closer to him. You closed your eyes as he leaned in closer to you, feeling his warm lips against yours. Casually you let your arms fall around his neck, feeling him deepen the kiss first.  Before you could enjoy any more of it he pulled away only enough to speak. 

“I didn’t say anything, not because I was going to reject you, but because I wanted to hear you tell me you liked me. I wanted to see your face when you said it to me and so I could tell you how much I liked you.” 

You gave him another quick kiss. 

“How much do you like me?” You teased.

At least now you had gotten your answer, and even if it wasn’t how you expected to tell him, you made sure to thank Jungkook for his mistake.

“I like the things you do more than I like my own face or cooking, or the rush I got from performing. I liked you when we hung out the first time at the coffee shop across the street and I liked you the last time we hung out when you cried into my chest about missing all of us before he went for the months long tour. I liked that you would always listen to me play the guitar for you when I was still learning, and I liked that you would try whatever I made for you when you came over and complimented me all the time. But you, I was in love with you.”

anonymous asked:

I say a lot of negative things in my daily life. I try to play it off as a joke, like I'm ripping on myself. "This is never gonna get better," "it's not like it matters if it gets done right now." I hadn't actually thought anything about my saying that to myself on a near daily basis until you reblogged that badge. My saying those things is hurting my attitude and mental health and the way I work my job. I've got to do better. I've got to feel better

!! it’s really true!! I fell into that mindset too without meaning to bc it really snuck up on me, and before I knew it I was really believing that I’d never get better. When I first found out that there were people like me who felt the same way, I was really happy, because I felt like I wasn’t alone, but finding other ppl with the same illness isn’t the same as finding other ppl with like, a shared obscure interest. Mental illness isn’t normal and it isn’t harmless either, and you can’t just say “hey there’s other ppl like me! Loads of ppl feel the same way so I don’t need to explain myself to anybody anymore or try to get better, this is who I am” because you’re never going to get better ever with that attitude. When I started seeing a new wave of positivity posts looking down on an anti-recovery attitude, it really was a wake-up call for me, because I hadnt even realized that I had fallen into the pessimistic outlook of “this is just who I am and I’m doomed to be scared forever”. Because it’s NOT who I am. Mental illness doesn’t define who you are, and it might feel like you’re being optimistic by accepting that you feel like shit and always will, but you’re really not. Accept that you have issues that make your life difficult, yes, but they can’t hold on to you forever.

Because you CAN get better. It’s not going to be easy, it might take a really long time, but it’s a slow process yknow?? it’s ok if you have a hard time doing things but just because you have a hard time doesn’t mean you’re never going to be able to have a better time. you CAN put in effort to get better, starting with the little things like reaching out to a friend even though it’s scary to be the first one to talk, or forcing yourself to finish a small task you keep putting off, or even doing some research on counselors in your area so one day you can phone one and get some professional help.

I’ve been dealing with anxiety my ENTIRE life, and it manifests in many ways, but I’m doing a lot better with it now than I was years ago, and that’s because I started making more efforts to face my fears. I’m scared of doing some things that other people find really easy, and sometimes I ask someone else to do it for me, but I found that avoiding doing something just made me more afraid of it, so I forced myself to do it anyway even though I was scared and it didn’t cure me the first time, or the second time, or even the tenth time, but every time I did it, it got a LITTLE bit easier, and that’s a good thing. You don’t need to jump in to doing things headfirst, and it’s definitely ok to still take time for yourself and ask others for help, but refusing to get better because you’re convinced it won’t happen is bad. It is. You gotta have faith in yourself that you can recover one day, and try little things one step at a time, and years from now you’re gonna be soooo glad you did

REQUESTED - Familiarity (1/2)

Request: So, i don’t know if u take requests, but, i would like to make one. I saw u liked some Peter Parker X Reader stuff ( I’m not a stalker, I SWEAR) and i was wondering if u would do a one-shot or something like that about the reader being Peter’s classrommate but for some reason being called to the avengers, and he is there in his suit and he keep seeing her in the school wondering why she was there? pls? - Anon

Pairing: Peter Parker X Reader

Word Count: 2,174

Warning: None, just cursing (Tell me something new)

(A/N): I’M HAPPY BECAUSE THIS IS MY FIRST REQUEST AND AAAAAAAAAAAAA <3 (Btw, It took me a long time to choose ONE gif, I’ve been looking gifs for a looooooong time by now.)

Part2 | Masterlist


Originally posted by peterparkerimagine


“Peter Parker is staring at you again.” My friend said under her breath, making me raise my eyes to where I knew the boy were before she even finished her sentence, and as if he heard her and saw me catching him staring, his gaze turned to the book in front of him. I chuckled at his red ears, and that seemed to make him even more embarrassed.

“He’s cute.” That time, I was the one staring. Not that I haven’t done it before, Peter just had this thing hidden under his soft, cute and “harmless” surface that always made my detective side itch.

“And you are totally calling him to a date.” She said, smiling at my arched brown “I know you have a crush on him; I’ve seen you looking at him before, Y/N. Don’t even try to lie.” I giggled and shrugged my shoulders, hearing her huff “If you don’t go there and call him, I will for you. However, I’ll make it from right here. You know how my voice is powerful.” She just winked at me with a smirk, fuck.

“I hate you.” I groaned while getting up and taking a breath before walking to where he was sitting, he had earphones but that didn’t stop him to look at me surprised when I sited in front of him, trying to give my best smile. He took his earphones slowly looking around to see if there was someone else before looking back at me “Hey, you’re Peter Parker, right?” Of course he was Peter Parker! Fuck, the teachers knew his name just because he was always late!

“Huh, y-yeah…”

“I’m-”

“Y/N… I know you.” I laughed at his embarrassed face, and took a time to study him from close. He had muscles, even though they were hidden under coats of shirts and of a hoodie.

“So, I thought you were really cute and I know you are fan of the same things as me, so I was thinking, would you like to go out with me to the arcade on the center of the city?” He almost choked with my boldness, but please, I ain’t got time to be playing a shy ‘let’s be friends’ girl.

“I-I w-would l-love it! W-when?” I smiled from ear to ear and took his notebook from the table and a pen to write my number

“Today at seven?” He nodded like crazy with his head and that made me smile more before sliding the book back to him and say in my most ‘I’m sexy’ voice “I’ll be waiting for you, Peter.”

I heard him gasp in surprise while I got back to my table, finally feeling my cheeks blush when seeing my best friend laughing like crazy, curled on the books, almost sobbing

“I-I love you, Y/N. You are my spirit animal!” I just chuckled, going back to my studies, proud of myself to be able to call the boy I liked on a date without squeaking, even though I was an agent, I was still a human with awkwardness.

I had to run to my apartment, for the first time happy to live alone so I didn’t have to explain nothing to no one. I smiled at my on reflection; it was still me. Comfortable, pretty and with analytical eyes.

When I opened my door, ready to run to catch a bus, I stumbled into a massive chest. Jesus Christ, that man was a fucking wall!

I looked up at the both man, frowning my brows and locking my jaw. They were familiar, but I didn’t know them.

“Excuse me, are you Y/N?” The one I had hit asked, blushing slightly at my angry gaze. I studied him more, strong, blonde, and a little shy.

“Captain America.” I said, crossing my arms and checking the other man, it didn’t took me long to recognize him. “Tony Stark, A.K.A Iron Man. What do you want?” The Captain glanced surprised at the Stark

“Do you mind if we came in?” He asked and I looked at the time, I had half an hour to be there

“Actually, I do. Look, I would be pleasantly happy to welcome two heroes at my home at any day. But I have a date with a boy I’ve liked for a while, and I’ll be late if I don’t go right fucking now.” I said, making Tony Stark lower his glasses and smirk slightly. Oh, for fuck’s sake, is night. Why is he wearing sun glasses?

“We want your help.” He finally said, making me frown my brows

“Three minutes, and here, in the hallway. By the smell, my neighbors are too high to understand anything.”

“Look, I’m not sure if-”

“Two minutes and forty seconds.” I crossed my arms, seeing Stark giggle

“I like her. We want you to be part of the new Avenger’s intelligence. Natasha Romanoff heard of you from S.H.I.E.L.D, they got an eye on you. But well, we are quicker.” My jaw almost fell to the ground. Ok, one thing was being an ‘agent’ slash ‘hacker’, other was being An Agent. “But, we need you right now.” A groan came out of my mouth, I didn’t want to turn Peter down! Especially because I was stupid and didn’t ask his number, so if I called him by the number I got, it would be weird!

“Fine, but I have to set a new fucking date with Peter.” I mumbled while searching my phone in my bag, Stark and Captain America glanced at each other in surprise.

“Language.” Steve whispered and I smirked

“Fucking language, I know. My grandmother would always scream that I fucking cursed too much, but she would curse in between phrases- Oh, hey, Peter!” I smiled at myself when my phone ringed right when I was ready to call him

Huh, Hey, Y/N… So… Huh, S-something happened and… huh, I can’t go… Sorry.” He mumbled looking nervous, I sighed, trying to look disappointed “I’m really sorry

“It’s okay… Huh… I guess I’ll have to… Hm, I don’t know.” I smiled at my own sad impression, tilting my head to give a challenging glare at The Captain, which looked surprised at me “Huh, another time, then?” I could even hear him slapping himself and screaming at something to muff his words.

I would like that. Sorry again.” I just turned the phone down, trying to sell better my “hurt and disappointed”, smiling at both man and crossing my arms again

“Okay, we can go now.” Stark just laughed as if he had won the lottery while the Captain smiled slightly at me and pointed at the corridor, asking without words for me to get out.


The whole trip on Starks car he would been giggling and smiling, while Steve Rogers - I found his name when he pulled his wallet to see something. Well, I got quick eyes. -, was staring at me and blushing when I smirked at him

“Soo, what is so bad that made the two Avengers go knock personally at my door?” I asked, trying to extract something of them before getting there

“It is a security failure on the government and we know you are a good hacker and… ‘Detective’. So, we want your help” The Stark said ironically, making me arch my brow

“Are you mocking my abilities? You know I can read you now and hack your precious high tec car, right?”

“Sweetie, I’m a well-trained man and that build the intelligence of this car to be-”

Tony Stark is currently single, he is a playboy, he has trust issues, haven’t slept in four days, he likes to eat donuts hidden from everyone in his lab, he wears his iron suit to try to make up the fact that he is a selfish, old man that uses sunglasses at night even though, he looks stupid doing it.” The robotic female voice of his car said, I looked up from my phone with a small grin on my face.

He narrowed his eyes at me while Rogers looked out of the window to try to hide his smile, and by his locked abdomen, I knew he wanted to laugh.

“You know, I really liked you.” I laughed and shrugged my shoulders

“Don’t worry, as long as you don’t doubt me, I’ll be good.” He tried to control his smile, but well, sassy people get along. “By the way, what will I gain with this?”

“Isn’t making good with your abilities and acknowledgment, enough payment?” Rogers said for the first time, making me arch one eyebrow at him

“Can I eat acknowledgment? Can I pay the bills with acknowledgment? I don’t fucking think so.” Stark laughed at my sentence

“She has a point. But, let’s just say your payment will good enough for you to go to a good college.”

“I won’t have to pay for it, I’ll enter with a scholarship.” I mumbled after a few moments, not being able to maintain silence

“Congratulations, you must have earned it.” Rogers said and I blushed slightly with that, I wasn’t used to people congratulating me for this kind of things. “You leave alone?”

“Yes.” I didn’t answer anything than that, it wasn’t something I liked to come up with.

When we finally got to the Avengers tower, I took every way I could run if they were trying to catch me. Well, people are weird, who knows, right? Caution is never too much.

I was welcomed with all the Avengers in the room, fuck they were tall!

“Everyone, this is Y/N, she’ll be helping us with our problem.” I studied everyone, Natasha Romanoff was the one that actually caught my attention, because she had something in her posture that made her stand out.

“I’m late, sorry!” A muffed voice was heard and everyone turned their gaze at Spiderman, he was still in his suit and stopped when saw me. Jeez, I know I am pretty, but don’t have to stare so much.

“Spider boy.” Stark smirked, making me look more into the boy, familiarity.

I controlled a smile when noticing something very interesting.

“So, what exactly you guys need my help with? Even though the boy I have a crush on was the one who turned down on me, I’m still not cool with being brought here just to stand and stare at heroes.” Spiderman gasped, making me control even more the laugh that wanted to explode.

“It’s the codes, someone is breaking them and releasing secret missions and… Other things, to the outside.” Natasha was the one to say it, I have to admit it. Being close to my favorite Avenger made me want to freak the fuck out.

“Is there a laptop or something like that?” She pointed with her head to the Kitchen’s counter, there was a silver laptop on it.

“Hey kiddo, Natasha tried before, don’t feel disappointed if you can’t, kay’?” One of them said, Sam Wilson, had been military.

“Okay.” I mumbled and started to work

“This might take some time, so, do you want us to call someone to warn that you won’t appear?” Captain America said, crossing his arms while I denied with my head, still focused on fixing the problem.

“Nah. And this tactic to make me say what you want, won’t work.” I heard a female laugh that I deduced to be Natasha’s.

“I like her.” I heard her say, I worked for a few more moments, with all the avengers watching me closely.

“Can I have some water, please?” I asked, hoping that it would make at least one of them get out of my back. That was making me nervous, shit.

“Spider, you heard the girl.” The Stark said and I rolled my eyes, the only one that was away, that stupid billionaire brought him close. I thanked when a cup was settled next to my hand

“Done.” I said tapping the last time before finally reaching to the cup of water.

“What? Already?” Someone said, I looked up from my shoulder, seeing that The Winter Soldier was the one to say it. “Natasha took hours and she failed.”

“Mind if I take a look?” She said, still surprised while I denied with my head, turning on the seat to face the others still drinking my water.

“So, how do I go back?” I asked, walking around the living room and receiving chocked gazes

“She did it.” Romanoff said “She even found the IP adress of the ones who broke it… How?”

“It wasn’t hard, actually. But the explanation would take longer than the actual deed.”

“I’ll take you home.” Stark mumbled, still surprised. I smiled at everyone

“You know I could have done that from home, right?” He laughed cheerfully while coming close to me, ready to lead me to the elevator again.

“Y/N, you just saved our asses so good! Thank you!” Sam Wilson said and I just waved with my hand

“It was nothing. Well, see you guys when you need me again. Less you, Peter. See you at school!” I smirked at a chocking Spiderman and followed Tony Stark, he was laughing loudly.

“I definitely like you.”