still debating on whether i like this or not

dear heartbreaker,
i’ve met someone else. he’s nothing like you. he’s all debates on whether tea or coffee is better, jazz music, clammy hands when he’s nervous and baseball caps. he’s nothing like you. he is fresh air seeping into my toxin filled lungs, which are all thanks to you. he’s nothing like you. I think that’s why i like him.

i’ve learned not to expect anything from men too early. they always seem to come up short on making spectacular impressions. we’re still at bashful sideways glances, flushed cheeks  and holding hands to fill the silence, and so far it has been enough. i remember when you and i went to the beach and i kissed you ankle-deep in ocean water. you tasted like salt and oranges and smoke, and i thought it was the most heavenly thing i’d ever tasted. maybe i was wrong. because lately i’ve been tasting spring rain and strawberries and something bubbly and it’s not as bittersweet as i thought it would be.


i don’t love him. it’s impossible for me to love him now, because you will still enter my mind more frequently than i’d like and leave my hands shaking. but i like the way his smile mixes my insides so i have to smile back, and the way his fingers brush lightly over mine when he wants to hold my hand. i don’t love him, but he makes me feel nervous and giddy, just the way early love should feel. i don’t love him, but i’m not sure if i still love you.


love,
not so heartbroken

—  letters i will never send #1
He asked me if I’d go back if I could, if I’d do it all again, with his forehead pressed to mine, with his tears sliding down my cheeks. “Yes,” I said and his body shook with every unsteady rise and fall of his chest. Sympathy and pity alike tore at my heart. He still saw the good in me. He always would, no matter how many times my words hit him like a punch to the jaw, like a knife to the throat. No matter how many times I’d change my mind. He’d never understood that I didn’t want to stay. That I wasn’t one to stay.
“The only reason why I’d do it again is because it made me who I am today. The nights I spent lying awake, tossing and turning. The times I debated whether or not to call you. That hollow feeling in my chest when it was over all of a sudden. Leaving you on your doorstep with tears in your eyes hurt me as much as it hurt you.” But I don’t know how to be different, I added in my head, I don’t know how to stop running. I took a step away from him and wiped his tears from my cheeks. Then I did what I did best. I ran.
—  excerpt
n.j.

Matthias Helvar | Six of Crows

Nina | Inej | Kaz

So I am still working on the full lineup of all Six of the Crow kids together but Matthias was all done and he looked so perdy I felt like just throwing him up by himself. Also I got super melancholy working on him oh man. Poor kid. I debated a lot about whether to draw him with his long hair from the flashbacks or after it’s all been chopped off but I had to go with the latter. EDIT: Added his name. :)

They told us Eurus, Redbeard, and Sherlock were all the same person in TAB

Do you remember the part where Sherlock drags his friends to Ricoletti’s grave and we think it’s real, but it’s actually mind palace?

The grave stone says “Emelia Ricoletti, Beloved Sister”

Sherlock jumps in and starts panting like a dog. He shovels dirt with his hands, digging like a hound with paws.

Sherlock is all three people.

“My husband is three people”

The Final Problem makes sense only in subtext. Whether you think it’s John’s MP or Sherlock’s MP, that’s still up for debate. I’m officially siding with Sherlock’s because there are flashbacks to the waterfall scene from TAB in TFP, which means both of those episodes must have been experienced by the same character, and I don’t think it was John for both.

Sherlock DID have a friend named Victor Trevor, but his death happened much later in Sherlock’s life. Because of that Sherlock took to hard drugs as a young adult, not as a child. There are two separate deaths he combined together to create TFP.

Redbeard was an imaginary friend. Sherlock didn’t have friends, we know this. He wanted to be a pirate – Mycroft remembers and misses that carefree child.

So what changed Sherlock’s mind? Why did the cold, logical, calculating machine take over and get rid of Sherlock’s imaginary friend?

Mycroft. He kept calling Sherlock “a stupid little boy”, saying “you always were so stupid”. Sherlock even says Mycroft thought he was an idiot. Sherlock stopped being “stupid” and tried to emulate his big brother – the only person in his life that would tolerate him. He tried solving the Carl Powers case and boom! Sherlock Holmes the little detective was born. This is why Mycroft brought up Redbeard at the wedding – “Hey, don’t get involved, remember when you had to resort to imaginary friends like a pathetic little child?” makes a lot more sense than “Hey, don’t get involved, remember your dead friend Victor who disappeared because our secret sister killed him?”.

Eurus represents the crushing logic that destroys everything Sherlock loves.

Because it’s happened before. Twice we’ve seen Sherlock’s mind explain how Victor died, we just didn’t know it.

Keep reading

The 64 Stages of Trump Grief (Campaign Launch - Present Day)

1. Laughter

2. Head-shaking

3. Disbelief

4. “…Is Anyone Gonna Stop This Guy?”

5. “Well THAT Has to Be the End of It”

6. Creeping Discomfort

7. More Head-Shaking

8. Taking to Your Friends in a Serious Tone About How This Might Be Like a Legit Problem

9. Disgust

10. Real Disgust

11. Disgust!

12. Feeling Barfy 24/7

13. Revulsion

14. Manic Laughter

15. Oh Boy, He Sexually Assaulted Women and Laughed About It With Billy Bush, I Sure Hope That Finally Ends It

16. …Nope, Still Going

17. Debating Whether Racism, Misogyny, or Stupidity is Worst Quality

18. Finding Solace in Polls

19. Shock

20. Fear

21. Disgust

22. Disbelief

23. Disgust!

24. Unrelenting Sadness

25. Cocktail of Fear, Disgust, Disbelief, and Sadness

26. Inability to Focus on Simple Tasks

27. Sad Head-Nodding at Every Revelation

28. Disgust

29. Teeth-Gnashing at Cabinet Nominees

30. “He’s a Fucking Russian Mole Why Isn’t Anyone Doing Something?!”

31. Averting of Eyes at Inauguration

32. Disgust

33. Fear

34. Deep Sadness that He Lives in White House

35. Missing Obama So Much it Hurts

36. Missing George W. Bush

37. Missing George H. W. Bush

38. Missing Reagan

39. Missing Clinton

40. Even Shitty DOMA/Welfare Reform/Kissing Gingrich’s Ass/NAFTA Clinton! I Even Miss THAT Clinton!

41. Disgust

42. Missing Carter

43. “I Gotta Get Off the Internet, Maybe Forever?”

43.1 Back on Internet

44. Shock, Disgust, Sadness, Fear, Misery

45. “We’re All Going to Die, Aren’t We?”

46. OH MY GOD HE IS SO INCOMPETENT

47. “The Racism is Worse than the Misogyny”

48. Missing Millard Fillmore

49. Sadness

50. “No, the Misogyny is Worse”

51. Giggling Uncontrollably at Something He Said that Is So Stupid It Does Not Qualify As ‘English’”

52. “I Can’t Be this Angry All the Time, I Need to Find An Outlet For My Anger, Maybe I’ll Like Get a Turtle to Take Care Of, Or Something”

53. Shock/Fear/Anger

54. Looking at Photos of Steve Bannon For Ten Minutes and Feeling Like If You Looked Like That You Would Not Consider Your Genes to be Superior to Those of a Fucking Salamander, Much Less Any Other Human Race

55. Legitimately Missing Karl Rove

56. Disgust

57. Missing George W. Bush Again Because In Retrospect At Least We Didn’t Always Feel Like We Were Going To Die

58. Sadness

59. Despair

60. A Deep, Thick, Dense Shame and Embarrassment at the Idea That A Man This Clumsy, Incompetent, Corrupt, Hateful, Misogynistic, Morally Deficient, Racist, Ignorant, Easily-Manipulated, and All-Around Ridiculous Could Be Elected President of the United States

61. That’s What It Really Is: It’s Embarrassing

62. So Embarrassing

63. I’m Embarrassed for America

64. It’s So Embarrassing

Posting my HQ Rarepair Exchange gift for Brianna ( @anime-does-it-best​ lmao) super last minute! 

This was for your prompt of BokuOi and post-apocalyptic settings. I had a couple ideas behind this, like, in the future some disease starts spreading through cities and involves zombie-like symptoms. Oikawa, a young but dedicated botanist, has a theory on a few plants that might lead to a cure. He embarks with former college classmates to hunt down the few remaining specimens of the plant species to then bring back to his lab. Along the way he has his doubts, but he’s reassured by one of their especially resilient companions…

**also i had such an intense internal debate over whether bokuto would still be able to dye/style his hair… went with a compromise

anonymous asked:

All this Bellarke sex talk is great and all but I kinda don't want them to go there yet? If they have sex this season it will be way too soon!!! Like we still haven't even gotten explicit romo confession from either party and there's still alot of debate regarding whether Clarke even possesses romantic feelings for Bell. BC is brilliant cos it's different from the fast pace of the other ships. At the most all Bellarke should get this season is a canon declaration of feelings +/- a kiss

its been 4 seasons…im thirsty 

Is There Somewhere (Tom Holland)

Originally posted by unsatisfied-teens

Pairing: Tom Holland x Osterfield!Reader
Warning: Cursing
Summary: Tom is seeing his best friend’s little sister behind his back, since the two of them are unsure of how Harrison would react. 
Author: Dizzy
A/N: Special thanks to the anon who requested this saying, “the reader being Harrison’s younger sister and sneaking around with Tom? Maybe she’s like 18-19.”

Masterlist Request a Prompt


Is there somewhere you could meet me?

read 2 min ago

You read over the text from Tom again, debated on whether or not you could ditch your older brother while the two of you were still out shopping. and then decided on just going to see Tom. 

“Hey, Haz?” Your voice caught his attention and pulled it away from the shirts he was looking at. 

“Yeah?”

“Is it okay if I go? I totally forgot I was supposed to meet up with a friend.” You lied.

“Yeah, sure. I’ll just text Tom and see if he wants to hang out.” Harrison said, causing you to panic slightly. 

“You can’t.”

“Why can’t I?” Harrison was now fully facing you. 

You were his little sister, only a few years younger and even at 20 and 18, he could still tell when you were hiding something up your sleeve. You, he always joked, could be read by him like an open book and this was one of those times. 

“Because he’s ill, remember? He was coughing up a storm yesterday.” You replied, shifted awkwardly and bit the inside of your lip. 

Harrison saw your tell, the way you stood and the way you bit your lip. He could tell you were hiding something from him, but what it had to do with Tom, that he couldn’t quite figure out. He’s ran through the scenario of you and Tom sneaking off a thousand times, but neither you nor Tom gave any hint that you were dating, so he brushed it off. 

But now, after two months of you dating Tom, you seemed to be hiding something from him and he could tell even if he was unsure of what you were hiding. 

“Oh, right.” Harrison nodded, shrugging your odd behavior off. “Go on and go, I’ll meet you at home? Maybe we could watch a movie when you get back?”

You smiled widely and hugged your brother quickly. “Thank you, Haz. I will definitely want to go see a movie. See you at home.”

And with a finally departing phrase, you were on your way to see Tom. 

Meet me at the corner of McKinley and Saint John. You texted Tom quickly as you made your way down the street. 

Is that where you want me to pick you up? 

You read Tom’s reply and shook your head as if he was there while you walked to the corner you spoke of. 

No, I want to go to the old cinema and see a movie.

Okay…But we never go to the movies.

Well, I thought we’d change that since we never go on casual dates. 

We watch movies at home all the time. 

No, movies are playing in the background and we’re making out. Totally not the same thing.

I’ll meet you there in ten minutes, okay?

Okay. 

You shoved your phone into your pocket as you made your way into the old cinema, the lights dancing about you as you were became surrounded by the chatter of people around you. 

“Can I help you?” The girl at the counter asked you.

“Yes. Can I get two tickets to see Star Wars?” You smiled softly. 

You received your tickets and paid for them before you took a seat on the bench and waited for Tom. 

He arrived not long after, approaching you with a large smile. 

“Hey, babe. You ready to go in?” He asked, helping you up off the bench. 

“Yep. Guess what movie we’re gonna watch?” 

“Hmm… let me guess, Star Wars?” He guessed, only to receive a nod from you. “Of course, predictable.” 

You shoved him playfully. “I am not predictable.” 

“You are very predictable.”

“Am not.”

“Are too.” Tom laughed at your childish antics. “You and Haz have been my best friends forever. I know you all too well.”

You pecked his cheek quickly and intertwined your hands as you two got you concession snacks and walked into the theater. 

“You’re pretty predictable too, you know.” You said softly. “I know you like the back of my hand.”

“That’s why we’re so good together,” Tom explained, “because we both know the other well and we just fit together.” 

Tom removed his hand from yours hand wrapped his arm around you as the movie began. 

You cuddled close to him, watched as light sabers clashed and characters fought. You felt happy and content, up against Tom like you used to sit with boys on your high school dates. 

In the midst of Tom pressing a kiss to your head, the door to the theater opened slowly, caused you to turn around at the sight of light flooding into the half empty theater and gasp at the sight of who you saw. 

Harrison walked into the theater, another friend of his in tow. 

“Psst. Tom.” You whispered softly. “Harrison’s here.”

“Like here in at the cinema or here as in he’s in this room?” he whispered back.

“The latter.” 

“Oh, crap.” Tom sighed. “Don’t worry, he probably won’t see us.” 

Just as Tom finished his sentence, Harrison took a seat next you and turned to you with a lopsided smile, looking much like the time he caught you out with a boy your mother hated very much. 

“Hello, Y/n, Tom.” He whispered with a nod. 

You two said nothing in response, just as Harrison said nothing the rest of the film. You wondered throughout the duration of the movie, if Harrison knew you’d be here or if he showed up purely by chance. 

Your question, however, was answered much sooner than you expected because Harrison spoke up as soon as the credits rolled.

“When were you going to tell me that you were dating Tom?” He asked you.

“I don’t know. I just thought that you wouldn’t be happy about it, since he’s your best friend and all.” You explained, glancing down at your lap. 

“I’m- I’m not mad that you’re dating Tom, I’m actually quite glad you’re dating him, you deserve a good guy like him. No, I’m not mad by that, but because you could’ve told me about it for fuck’s sake. You’re my little sister, I just want to know you’re okay.”

“I’m okay. I’m fine, Haz. I’m sorry we didn’t say anything.” 

“You’re welcome, Y/n.” He smiled and pulled you into a side hug before looking at Tom. “But if you hurt her, you’re getting ten times more pain from me than what you give her.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know. You’re her older brother, you say shit like that.” Tom laughed.

“I mean it, Tom.”

“I know you do.”

“Like, I really really mean it.”

“Oh shut up, mate. We know you wouldn’t hurt a fly.” Tom laughed. “Now, can Y/n and I get back to our date? Alone?”

Harrison laughed. “Sure thing. I’ll see you at home, remember?” He asked you. 

“Of course, Haz.” 

“Take care of her, man.” He told Tom. 

“Don’t I always?” 

City Lights

Reader x Jongdae

Summary: Monotony is something you tend to avoid at all costs, and Chen seems to be exactly the escape you’re looking for.

Genre: smut/angst

Warnings: sexual content, infidelity 

Word Count: 3,548

A/N: This fic has been sitting in my drafts since before I even started Monster, so hopefully this turns out well lmao. I was debating for a long time whether or not to continue from where I ended it, but I just couldn’t make it work. Anyway, here goes my second attempt at smut, I hope you enjoy!

Originally posted by lawlliets



You sighed quietly, staring out of the floor-to-ceiling windows covering one wall of your bedroom. It was past midnight now, yet the lights below were still bright. Vehicles still streamed through the streets like a never-ending river, and people crowded the sidewalks as they moved from place to place. You could almost imagine yourself down there now, taking in the sights, the smells, and the atmosphere of the city you called home.

Instead, you were standing in the master bedroom of your luxurious penthouse, clothed in a thin, silk robe that barely kissed the top of your thighs. Your entire being was drawn to the nightlife outside, but here you were.

You tossed a careful glance over your shoulder at the man sleeping soundly in the king-size bed: your fiancé, Min Yoongi.

Keep reading

Why a chapter of WtM takes so ridiculously long to write:

I decide that Katniss is going to sing an adorable German children’s song to Peeta, but I’m an enormous nerd and therefore not happy with the immediately accessible English translations (remember when I found out Füchslein means “little vixen”?) so I put the lyrics word-by-word into Google Translate and tweak the English version, debating whether or not I care if it rhymes and if I should tweak it still more to fit Panem/Everlark/etc.

[And yes, I could ask for help from a German speaker on Tumblr, but this feels like one of those things I need to wrestle through on my own, like a tricky riddle or a word problem… :P]

Case in point: “Alle meine Täubchen…

Translation: “All my doves…” 
Me: (whose knowledge of German is limited to growing up Lutheran and singing some art songs and sacred choral pieces in college) Doesn’t “chen” as a suffix usually mean “little”?
*seeks second opinion*
Google Translate: Täubchen = pigeon
Me: Um, no.
*types “translate Täubchen” into the search bar*
Google Search Result: “And Hansel answered: “I’m saying goodbye to my little dove on the roof." 
Me: 

Originally posted by 1980s-90sgifs

anonymous asked:

Hello! I can never seem to make an edit without a skirt causing mayhem, so I was wondering if you had any tips on skirt physics (like preventing clipping and such). Sorry to be a bother, and thank you.

o bro im probably like the last person u should ask bc im still working out physics and weird stuff like that (esp with my gumi bc she’s a total disaster rn) BUT some tips that might help!!!!!

i also wrote this out like b4 hand and then it wouldnt publish so here goes the second try

keep in mind i do use the skirt plugin to rig and shit but the physics i work with after

1. make the physic bodies longer width and height wise (thickness as well but that’s debatable depending on whether ur skirt is long or short)

this just helps ish and normally once u do this, the skirt should be pretty fine and dandy

2. for the moving joints, set the values to something like this:

or a value between -0.8, 0.8, -0.8, 0.8, -0.8, 0.8
-80.00, 80.00, -80.00, 80.00, -80.00, 80.00

and -1.6, 1.6
-160.00, 160 u get my drift lmao
(those are the standard numerals i use for my skirt moving joints)

i honestly have no idea what it means bc i use the japanese version of MMD for aesthetic so it’s probably something important

3. observe other people’s skirt physics- usually that helps a Lot

4. work with the physic body values

i also have no idea what these mean but these are my standards right now, however the first one 0.1 is mass so if u want it heavier make the value higher, idk why it’s set to 0.1 but that’s super light (also these are may’s secret hair physics which i stole for skirts for no reason but they work ok)

5. also don’t forget to work with the physic bodies for the legs and stuff to obviously prevent the skirt flipping into the thighs (i.e. make it thicker etc.)

6. for longer, tighter skirts (like luka’s) i tend to link half the skirt bones to one leg and the other half to the other leg (rather than the lower body bone)

this helps to prevent the leg popping through during intense motions (like gigantic OTN esp for longer skirts) as the leg will move the skirt bones instead of leg going through the skirt bones- so all the skirt physics will follow said bones (idk how to explain but u’ll see wat i mean)

* u don’t need to link the joints to the leg physics either
i can’t remember other tips i can provide but i hope this is ok man

sorry for crap quality, i’ll fix it once i have proper wifi zzz

Sorry

Originally posted by jeonify

note: late.  sorry.  

Prompt: Day 3 (9/28/16): “No offense, but I really don’t like you.” (Jungkook)

*

*

*

You are a nervous wreck as you make your way up the stairs to a trendy rooftop bar.  Of course, your body language doesn’t betray your discomfort; if anything, you slow your heel-clad strides to give the illusion of careless calm.  You had debated on whether or not to skip out entirely on this informal high school reunion.  You weren’t exactly close with anyone from back then, and you barely kept in touch with the few friends you did make.  

Still, the pettiest part of you had clawed out from the deepest corner of your heart when you saw in group chat that Jeon Jungkook was going to show up.  Nerves or not, you knew you’d be there to see him.  

And you’d make sure to get your apology.

Keep reading

catskye  asked:

Hey, I can't tell whether women like Madonna and Nicki Minaj choosing to hyper-sexualize themselves to sell music is “pushing society’s boundaries by expressing their sexual freedom” or “contributing to society’s problem of objectifying women as sexual objects in order to sell a product”. So, which is it?

To be completely honest, I’m kind of still on the fence about this one (the debate between empowerment and self-objectification). 

I will say, though, that female pop stars face much more criticism over owning and expressing their sexuality than other artists who objectify women in their music videos or shows. Female dancers are regularly used as props and decoration in music videos and shows without anyone batting an eye; the real outrage is reserved for female pop stars dressing provocatively (especially if they identify as feminists). In these cases, it’s not so much the display of sexuality that elicits these reactions, but rather who is doing it and for what reasons.

Here are some relevant articles:

Women in Music Videos: Self-Objectifying or Objectively Empowering?

Are “Empowered” Pop Stars Claiming Sexuality or Giving Into the Patriarchy?

5

The moment I saw those tweets I thought, “Someday. Someday I will draw something related to this”.

And that day is today.

You’re welcome.

I’m including initial sketches for their poses under cut because I like them more than finished picture. Art is hell. 

Keep reading

Genuine question for the American comrades (and I suppose you could also extrapolate this to other countries as well, though I can only speak for the country I live in):

Do you think leftist movements should at all cater to notions of patriotism? When we eventually stand at the viable point of social revolution, supported by the grand majority of the population, whether we like it or not, nationalist idealism will still probably exist among large enough portions of the population to warrant debate on this topic. Ya know, a sort of notion that this is “the last civil rights movement” along a path towards genuine liberty, “as the Founding Fathers intended”. Or an idea that “the American Dream could be brought down to everyone”. “Workplace democracy and economic democracy are natural extensions of the political democracy guaranteed by the Constitution, and bottom-up resistance to tyranny is as American as apple pie.

Now, I don’t think these interpretations are altogether “good” per se, but I will concede that these interpretations will probably hold a lot of power for people when the time comes. Not everyone is going to have the copious amounts of ideological scaffolding that will allow them to fully see how twisted the American legacy is and to undo a lifetime of propaganda. If a person comes to embrace the material conditions for an eventual classless society, and comes to recognize the necessity for revolutionary overhaul to establish such conditions, then I’m willing to give a lot of wiggle room with regard to whether or not they’re fully “up to par” on the larger ideological framework. Much of the population will have anti-American sentiments by the time of social revolution, but not everyone will, and it’s important to recognize that you’re still going to find plenty of people with pro-American sentiments who’ll support social revolution (with ideas and justifications similar to the above). Those aforementioned material conditions of economic democracy will, in large part, help create a cultural revulsion to tyranny and imperialism over time anyway – base/superstructure at work. 

What about the flag? Of course the flag represents centuries of brutal oppression and disenfranchisement domestically and intensive imperialism abroad, but do you think there will still be enough people romanticizing the hell out of the thing? Do you think it should be nipped in the bud entirely, through vigorous information spreading from the ground floor? Should the flag undergo change or be altered entirely? If people want to keep the flag in some capacity, I’ve seen suggestions akin to this:

and I’m not altogether opposed to something like that – though at the end of the day I’d still want to see the eventual dissolving of the nation state and borders and the romanticized ideals of “patriotism”. Just as I feel that a transitory (Luxemburgist) socialist state may very well be necessary before full post-scarcity communism, I recognize that there will likely be a need for wiggle room in the eventual dissolving of “the old condition”. I would hope schools in a socialist society would, at the very least, address crimes associated with Empire in a much more thorough manner (education no longer being utilized superstructurally to uphold a capitalist class society and all) – within a generation or two, patriotism to some idealized “America” would plummet.

This debate is important to me because I find that I make more progress “converting” working class and middle class friends and family when I frame the move towards socialism, as mentioned a few paragraphs above, as complementary to the political democracy guaranteed by the Constitution and as a bottom-up resistance to tyranny. I mean, it’s definitely true in the latter case. Pardon my language, but it’s about “selling” an idea. 

I’m especially curious to see what other socialists think about this whole topic.