This is the second time in a month I have been called “boring” or “picky” or “selective” for the things I do with my free time, but it isn’t the second time I’ve been called this in my life. I’m so done with people telling me these things, so done with people making me feel bad for my tastes and the things that actually make me happy, the things that make me feel like there’s something really warm in my chest, and I tell you I’m done.
Do I like going to libraries and museums and spending the afternoon and night at a friend’s house watching movies? Yeah. Do I drag you along with me when I go in one of my “boring cultural outings”, as you put it? NO. Do I tire you with one of my conversations about literature or philosophy or what ever other thing I’m passionate about? Fucking no. Do I respect your decisions and never get in your way? Hell yeah. I never make people do things they don’t actually enjoy. I never make people who don’t want to spend time with me spend time with me. I’m fucking perceptive and I recognise when people don’t like the things I’m talking about, and I change the fucking topic as soon as I can.
Do I respect the fact that you like clubbing and drinking with friends? Hell yeah, God knows I do that too from time to time, good for you mate. But don’t tell me I’m boring for not going to clubs until 6 in the morning every other weekend, because that’s not really my thing and even if it were I don’t have the means to carry that train of life. And don’t tell me I’m being “dishonest with myself” or “changing” or “evolving” or even fucking “turning into a proper adult already” because I like to have drinks with friends and dance in clubs too, from time to time.
You can do anything you want at any given moment as long as you’re not hurting anyone and I don’t think I hurt anyone by spending my free time in the ways that make me absolutely happy.
So from now on I’m going to do whatever the fuck I want and whatever the fuck makes me happy and anyone who tries to make me feel bad about it can go fuck themselves and find a new fucking hobby that isn’t trying to hurt others by their choices, because it’s not gonna work with me. It’s not gonna work anymore. If I want to spend hours at a library or a museum, I will. If I want to put on some lipstick and high heels and go dance with my friends at a club after having a beer, I will do it. If I want to stay at home one night having dinner with my parents and siblings and my niece and laugh lots with them I’ll fucking do it. If I don’t want or can’t go out because I have responsibilities I’ll fucking do my thing. If one day I want to spend my money in books and the next in cinema tickets and the next in a museum ticket and the next I tell you I can’t go to that fucking club because I don’t have any money left, I’ll tell you. I’ll do everything’s that makes me happy, and you can not stop me.