stick bombs

anonymous asked:

We know Lance is super smart, but... Headcanon that sometimes in everyday situations (or what counts for everyday situations when you're fighting a space war) he just loses all common sense and says and does dumb things. It happens so much and it's so funny that the team starts calling these times Lance Moments. Even when someone else does a dumb thing, it is called having a Lance Moment.

dude sorry this was one of those asks i’ve been sitting on bc i just. love to think of not only lance moments. but a whole array of paladin moments.

  • lance moment: when you get too overconfident and embarrass yourself
    • origin: “wow that’s like 1000 plus 10″, and other greatest hits
    • example:
      shiro: hey guys be careful there’s a bunch of debris up ahead
      keith: whatever i can handle it [promptly crashes into space garbage]
      pidge: LMAOOO KEITH LANCED UP
  • keith moment: when you forget all social etiquette
    • origin: just when the other kids had finally acclimated him to Teenage Interactions, he tried to fistbump a diplomat and it was interpreted as an attack
    • example:
      alien host: and here is our most sacred animal
      pidge: eww
      lance: [slapping a hand over her mouth] what keith here meant to say was,
    • pidge almost has more keith moments than keith. but keith’s are always more disastrous so he holds the title.
  • pidge moment: when you completely forget that there’s something else you’re supposed to be doing
    • origin: pidge was supposed to be developing a virus or something so everyone left her alone but after a full day somebody checked on her and it turns out she got distracted and had actually been programming a game on her computer
    • example:
      coran: oh, hunk! did you finish recalibrating the teludav?
      hunk: [surrounded by books on taujeerian biology] did i what
      pidge: AHA!! IT WASN’T ME THIS TIME!!
  • hunk moment: when you get overemotional at inopportune times
    • origin: everyone pulled off an incredible maneuver in the middle of a battle and hunk started tearing up and talking about how much he loves everyone and “hunk, i love you too buddy, but maybe save this for later”
    • example:
      shiro: …and you’re such a smart and talented young lady and i’m so proud of everything you’ve accomplished–
      pidge: ok ok i know hunk thank you but i really need to be hacking into this server right now
  • shiro moment: when you accidentally let something really morbid slip out
    • origin: after two sleepless nights, allura asked shiro if there was anything he needed and he replied in a monotone “the sweet embrace of death”
    • example:
      coran: it’s a fascinating creature honestly! once it has completed growing, it only has ten quintants before its body begins destroying itself.
      lance: goals
      keith: …are you ok? that was a very shiro thing to say.

bonus:

  • allura moment: when you surprise everyone with a previously unknown kickass ability
    • origin: the shapeshifting thing, and probably many others
    • example:
      pidge: [grabs a stick and knocks a bomb far into the distance]
      lance: what the heck
      pidge: what? matt and i used to play baseball all the time, i’m pretty good at it
      lance: god you’re such an allura
  • coran moment: when you pull a paladin moment, but play it off flawlessly
    • origin: anything he ever says. he’s making up half the nonsense that comes out of his mouth. nobody notices or calls him out on it.
    • example: there are none. coran is the only being known to pull off a coran moment.

why does no one ever like. mention the weird part of all of our childhoods where we thought we were too cool for the shows we grew up with like i Know that wasnt just an isolated thing like everyone used to make fun of dora the explorer and barney especially i remember everyone used to sing to the tune of barney “i hate you, you hate me, lets strap barney to a tree, with a great big bomb and stick it through his head, 3-2-1 barneys dead” like….. that was so fucked,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, why was that a thing……

Cherry Bomb (Taeyong x Reader)

Rating: M

(A/N) OOPS! I DID IT AGAIN!!!! I GAVE YOU A SMUT, I WROTE ANOTHER ONE…OH BABY, BABY! Anyway, here’s some yummy retro Taeyong smutty goodness. A little short and sweet, but definitely gets its point across if you know what mean :^)))))))))) Enjoy!

Originally posted by jonqins

It felt weird walking into an arcade, having not visited one since when you were younger. The welcoming sounds of heavily synthesized music, trigger clicks, and the smacking of big plastic buttons brought back a wave of nostalgia and made you smile as you peered over the shoulders of people playing. There were no kids in sight though, just people around your age who laughed and joked, drank, reminiscing in their childhood. You’d been coerced into going to a twenty one and older event at the local vintage arcade that had just opened down the street from your apartment. People were going bananas of the shiny restored arcade machines, vintage interior, and nostalgic music.

Keep reading

REMUS LUPIN X READER (TRUTH OR DARE?)

ok so i’ve just watched The Amazing Spiderman and i got Remus feels while watching Peter so here you go, a young Remus Lupin imagine

also, if anyone wants part 2, it could be their date, them already being together, smut, just request and i’ll write:)

i’m sorry i posted it again, tumblr was playin with meh

word count: 1204

PART 2 IS COMING

Originally posted by meghansfox

It was a cold day of winter at Hogwarts, snow covering the windows and the grounds, so it was safe to say that not one student was outside. Of course, there were a lot of things to do in the castle, such as annoying Filch, pranks, annoying Peeves (or him annoying you), playing chess, muggle-borns playing hide and seek, there was a lot to do. But with all these things to do, there were certain people that were extremely bored.

You and your friend, Lily, were in the common room, near the fire. She had her nose buried in a book, as always, and you were simply staring at the fire with a cup of hot tea in your hands, a blanket wrapped around you. You two were enjoying the silence, although you weren’t the only people in the common room; it was quiet, and that was what you both needed.

“Oi, Evans, Y/L/N, come here, let’s play a game!” you turn around and see four boys climbing out of the portait hole; Sirius, James, Peter and Remus, the four Marauders. Sirius, being the one who called you, looked at you with a smirk on his face. “Oh, come on, it’s not like you have something better to do,” he whined. It was somehow true, you didn’t. But Lily was.

You looked at the four boys, until your eyes lay on Remus and you look away quickly, blushing. It was alright, you could blame it on the fire. “Well, I don’t know… Lily?”

“No way, I’m reading.” She shook her head.“

“Please, Lily,” you beg. You could use come distraction from your thoughts right now.

She sighed and close her book, which made a loud noise. “Fine,” she said firmly. “But if you make us break the rules…”

“We won’t, Evans, now come on, let’s make a circle,” Sirius says excitedly as he sits down on the carpet, along with the others, so you were sitting between him and Lily. James, being head over heels for Lily, sat next to her, and took out of his pocket an empty bottle of firewhisky. “I start!” yells Sirius as he spins the bottle, all of your eyes watchin it intently.

It landed on Sirius and James. “Truth or dare, young man?” Sirius cocked an eyebrow at his bestfriend.

“Dare,” he said, looking at Sirius intensely.

“I dare you to go to Filch and ask him girl advice.” He smirked, as you all let out a laugh. James agreed, and soon enough we were all in wandeing the corridors in search for Filch.

         ***

“Oh, my God,” you laugh, trying to catch your breath as you enter in the common room again.

“He said to stick a dung bomb up her arse,” James laughed so loud it echoed through the corridors.

They sat back in the circle and James spun the bottle, it making an annoying sound as it spun, everyone curious who’s going to be the next one. It stopped on James and you. “Truth or Dare, Y/N?” You quickly glanced at Remus, although you didn’t know why and catch him already staring at you.

“Truth,” you answer, moving your glance back on James.

“Do you fancy someone?” You roll your eyes at the stupid question, although a blush appears on your cheeks, knowing that the person was in the room.

“Maybe,” you answer.

“That’s not how you should answer!” James exclaims, smirking.“Who is it, Y/N?”

“Yes, I do fancy someone. I’m not telling you who it is, you’re only allowed one question,” you say as you spin the bottle. It stopped at you and Sirius. “Oh, are you joking!” you cried.

“Well, Y/N, I give you two options. Truth, you say who you fancy. Dare, you kiss him.”

“How do you know it’s a he? Maybe it’s a she, maybe I’m a lesbian,” you look at him with your eyebrows raised.

“We both know you’re not. Now, your choice.”

You sigh dramatically. You thought this was gonna be fun, you never thought you were going to be forced to admit your feelings towards Remus, or worse, kiss him. Not that it would be bad to kiss him, because quite frankly, you played your first kiss in your head a million times, but not in these circumstances. Either way, you weren’t exactly forced to do any of those, you could easily leave. But you didn’t want to be a coward. “Fine, you wanna know who I fancy?” you throw your arms in the air with exasperation, as they all looked at you curiously. Lily obviously knew, as she was your bestfriend, but the four Marauders didn’t, and you weren’t keen to tell them. “It’s one of you.”

“No, Y/N, you have to tell us-”

“Says who?” you say as you get up.

“T-the game? Y/N, come on! Don’t leave us like this,” Sirius whines. “It’s not fair. At least give us a clue!”

You thought for a bit. You had to say something that none of them would get it, only Remus. He’d be the only one who would get it, because of course, it’s about him. There was something that he onle shared with you. “It’s the one who has a stack of chocolate,” you smile playfully and go towards the girls’ dormitories.

“But none of us has that!” you hear Sirius yell after you, but you were already in your room, ready to sit on the bed, when you hear steps rushing up the stairs and then the door opens, Remus standing at the entrance, panting.

“Y/N,” he said breathlessly. “I mean, I-um, there is no one else with a stack of chocolate by any chance, is it?” he asks looking at you hopefully, a slight blush covering his cheeks.

You take a step closer as you were both a few inches away from each other. “From all I know there’s only you.” You shrug.

“Well, I-I, um, I… don’t know what I’m saying,” he laughs and clears his voice.

“Just say it.”

He opened his mouth to say something, but decided against it and closed it. Instead, he placed his hands on your waist and brushed his lips against yours, pulling you into a deep kiss. As you weren’t expecting that, you took a few seconds to answer his kiss and move your hands to cup his cheeks, enjoying everything you ever imagined these past few months.

As you pull away, your hands still remain on his cheeks and his on your waist. “The boys are probably mad because I have a stack of chocolate and I didn’t tell them,” he said and you laughed. “If you haven’t noticed yet, I like you too, Y/N.”

“I do now.”

“Then go out with me! W-we could go to a bookshop, I know you love books, we could also get tea and we could just read-”

“Remus,” you said firmly. He looked at you concerned. “That’d be amazing, but don’t stress that much for me, please. It’s just me, Y/N.”

“The fact that it’s just you, Y/N, absolutely drives me crazy,” he whispers before pulling you into another kiss.

Law Abiding Citizen, Episode 4
  • Russ [with a bomb]: So, is this like a GPS tagging device essentially?
  • Doug: Yeah, exactly, that's exactly what it is.
  • Russ: So I can just tag him, and...
  • Russ: *sticks the bomb to a nearby civilian who immediately starts panicking*
  • Doug: Yeah, tag him, and he'll go...
  • Russ: And then Uber comes?
  • Doug: Uber comes and picks him up if you call them now, so...
  • [The bomb detonates, killing the civilian]
  • Doug: ...now Russ. Russell. You've killed an innocent man with an explosive device. That was ill-advised. That was immoral!
  • Russ: No, you said it was a GPS, Doug!
  • Doug: Russ. I AM A DEMON. WE'VE BEEN DOING THIS FOR A WHILE. I LIE TO YOU. YOU KNOW THIS.
On Gem Navi and Blockhead

I think I figured out why I don’t like Gem Navi/Aquamarine and Blockhead/Topaz’s designs. It’s simple really. They aren’t original in the slightest. Blockhead literally looks like Jasper with a buzzcut, a nose, and gems for ears, and she even takes the whole “fusion that can pass as a single gem” thing from Garnet. And Gem Navi is arguably worse in this regard, being a combination of Lapis’ water wings and color scheme (seriously, why not use blue and green, or even a turquoise color?), and Peridot’s stature and, if the leak is to be believed, personality. Navi is literally just a Lapis with gremlinitis and a wand that raided the wardrobe of Veronica Sawyer from Heathers. And that’s why I don’t care about them as much as say, Bismuth, the Rubies, Centipeetle, or Jasper. They have nothing new to offer us, no new concepts, aside from maybe that weird thing Topaz is doing to store humans in her body in a leaked screenshot. Other than that, that’s it, and I generally don’t find them interesting simply because they are just bootlegged versions of Jasper and a combination of Lapis and Peridot, but without any of the charm. We’ll see if that changes, but for now, I am more excited to see Pearl and Garnet’s sandcastle than I am for these two, aside from the rare unintentional funny moment. (Blockhead leaning in from the corner anyone? Hilarious)