dragon age mod where you don’t have to see the weird sex cut scenes in Origins. Instead, you see the rest of the party all sitting around looking really uncomfortable, while the Warden and their LI go at it a few feet away. Leliana is singing to try to distract everyone. (If Leliana is the LI, Sten is singing in a perfect Leliana impression.)
honestly game designers, just make all companions romanceable, don’t question it, dont think “No one’s gonna want to fuck the dwarf/qunari/undead grandma/sentient living statue/toaster robot/radiation burn victim” bc somewhere, out there, someone absolutely does.
Origin companions react to a dwarf warden seeing a bird and screaming
Alistair: It takes him a moment to realize where their fear is stemming from, but once it registers with him he is a little confused. It is only when another companion points out that they’ve likely seen few if any surface dwelling creatures that he apologizes sheepishly and promises to keep them safe.
“After all, we wardens have to flock together. Get it, because birds of a feather? I’ll…just go away now.”
Morrigan: Her disinterest is clear, but unlike Alistair she at least has a quick grasp of the cause of their reaction.
“Tis merely a creature of the air, warden, and of which you will see many in your time here on the surface. Now come– we have more important matters.”
Leliana: Immediately she is alert, looking around for enemies, but once the source of their fear is uncovered she cannot help but laugh. Leliana feel’s terrible about it afterwards, of course -she was amused, not cruel- and promises to keep them safe from avian threats in the future.
“If we require a songbird I am here, What sparrow can outsing a nightengale?”
Sten: He is not impressed. Even a dwarf is many times bigger than one small songbird, and they have bigger issues to face. They are above Orzammar now– it is time to face those threats.
“Vashedan, there is no time for such foolishness. Control yourself.”
Wynne: For someone who has also lived in a controlled society for most of her life the mage understands how new sights can be frightening. Of all the companions she is the most sympatheitc, and moves to comfort without chiding.
“There now, no harm done. Just a song bird on her way to her nest. She won’t hurt you, any more than you might fall into the sky. It’s all right.”
Zevran: He finds the situation amusing, most of all because this is the Warden he could not assassinate. If any of this ever gets out he will never find work again.
“Truly, my dear warden, you continue to astonish. Darkspawn and bandits do not phase you, but a robin is fear itself. Only a shame you are not so frightened of Crows.”
Ohgren: He’s screamed right along with them, the haze of alcohol making the bird seem as frightening as the arch demon, and so is of little help.
“Damn surface vermin! By the Stone why can’t things stay rooted where they belong?!”
Loghain: He has very little comment to make, but a part of his mind is both amused and infuriated that this is what brought him down.
Time freezes, the sun ceases it’s journey, and for the first time in so many, many years, Shale finds someone who understands them. A connection is forged then, one that shall never be sundered, and with surprising gentleness the golem places their hand on the Warden’s head.
“Do not fear, warden. Someday all the birds shall die.”