Okay, so let me tell you why I admire Okabe Rintarou.
Number one: What a good man, I mean, what a good man. I mean, yeah, he’s a hipster tsundere chunnibyou shit, but he changed his identity on a dime to keep his best friend from succumbing to despair and fading away because he loved her just so much.
Number two: When this girl he loves so, so much is killed by Moeka, he puts himself through the wringer to save her life. What does this involve? Sending his memory back in time (which, in the VN, is revealed to be an agonizing process in itself) and watching her die again and again, but he never gives up, no matter how badly it hurts or how far he has to push himself
Number three: oh god, and he agonizes, and kills himself and blames himself over all he has to do to save Mayuri, including but not limited to basically killing Feyris’s dad and restoring Rukako to a life of gender dysphoria and he feels so bad about it, oh god, these poor children
Number four: When he finally gets the opportunity to kill Moeka, the woman who killed the most important person in his life, (in the VN Makise flat-out tells him to kill her if he has to) despite all his hate and anger he cannot bring himself to kill her. he just can’t.
Number five: when Moeka lies dying (anime: shot by Mr. Braun/ VN: stabbed by Nae), in the VN (and maybe in the anime too, its been a while since I’ve seen it) he forgives her. He wonders in his head if he really means it or if he’s just saying it to make her feel better, but he says it. he forgives her and lets her die in relative peace, this woman who killed the most important person in his life to keep the most important person in hers, and I could go on forever about Okabe and Moeka’s parallels, but I’ll just leave it by saying that Okabe is such a better person than I am, because I would have killed her with my own two hands and held that festering hate from the womb to the tomb
Number five: he realizes that he loves Makise, and he still sacrifices her for Mayuri because Oh God it hurts and this is such a horrible decision and in the VN it was so hard to watch him realize and debate with himself, because fate has dictated that he can’t have them both and oh my god my son my beanpole son
Number six: He does it and she dies and he tries to move on, but he gets a chance to save her. And he tries and he fails and he almost gives up for the guilt, but Mayuri helps him. And he is broken and sad and traumatized, but he picks himself up with Mayuri’s help and he tries again
Number seven: this new attempt ends up with himself getting stabbed. and he is standing there with a knife in his stomach and the woman he loves alive and well- and he stuns her, and digs into his own wound to provide enough blood to fool his past self and save them all and oh god then he waits around to make sure it worked when he’s bleeding out and in agonizing pain
Number eight: after all this happens, he has pins made and invites all his friends to be parts of the lab- even Moeka. He has been through so much and caused them all such pain, but he’s doing his best to make it right with the tools he has been given, and oh my son I die
Number nine: AND CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE SCENE WHERE HE’S WALKING DOWN THE STREET TALKING ABOUT HOW HE’S HAPPY JUST KNOWING KURISU IS ALIVE EVEN IF HE CAN’T BE WITH HER PERSONALLY OH MY GOD
Number ten: the movie, ok, when he says that all he ever wanted was for kurisu and mayuri to be safe and it really doesn’t matter whether he fades from existence or not now i’m crying help
I just love Okabe Rintarou ok, he’s such a good and forgiving man