static television

Classifications of cronch

Classic Cronch™
•snow
•styrofoam
•gravel
•celery
•stepping on leaves
•beach sand

Squonch (squish-cronch)
•floam
•slime
•bubble slime
•slime with beads/sequins

Cranch (crack-cronch)
•crackling fire
•breaking pastries
•breaking sticks/twigs

•glow sticks

iCronch (ice/water cronch)
•ice
•slushies

NatCronch (nature-cronch)
•crushing pinecones
•leaves
•tree bark
•gravel
•crushing acorns
•crushing seed pods

Plonch (plastic/paper cronch)
•chip bags
•wax paper
•crinkly paper
•crinkly plastic
•those crinkly balloons

Slonch (sizzle-cronch)
•sizzling bacon
•hot oil
•opening a soda can
•sizzle

Sonch (sand-cronch)
•kinetic sand
•squishing sand
•crumbling sand

Monch (marble/bead cronch)
•wood beads
•plastic beads
•marbles
•fuze beads
•buttons
•pins
•clips
•jewelry
•glass beads

Bronch (breaking cronch)
•stepping on broken glass
•breaking cds
•snapping wood
•crushing boxes
•stepping on soda cans

Chonch (chop-cronch)
•chopping kinetic sand
•cutting kinetic sand
•chopping/cutting floam
•chopping styrofoam
•chopping vegetables

Clonch (click-cronch)
•clicky buttons
•switches
•gears
•roller coasters

Chench (chew-cronch)
•crackers
•cookies
•rubber/silicon
•carrots
•mouth sounds

Winonch (wind-cronch)
•breathing/blowing in ear
•blowing into microphone
•wind
•brushing microphone

Glonch (glitch/static cronch)
•glitching noises
•tv static
•vhs static
•chhhh sounds

Verbonch (verbal-cronch)
•making vocal cronch noises
•cronchy echolalia
•the words cronch

Scronch (scratch-cronch) •scratching hard surfaces •drumming fingers •scratching cardboard •scraping •caligraphy

some hobbies

• casual dissociation
• extreme dissociation
• rum & cola
• avoiding
• not feeling anything
• feeling everything
• feeling nothing and everything at the same time (intensely)
• melting
• sitting in a cauldron of my own bubbling disorders and illnesses
• TV static
• headaches
• Astral projection and general witchery

What the Signs remind me of (oddly specific)

Aries: The neon red that lights up a sex store sign. It is an oddly but warm light that keeps you safe.

Taurus: The tickling caress of silk sheets on your thigh.

Gemini: TV statics. The only sound in the house while a storm is bursting outside.

Cancer: The bit of light that beams through the blinds and wakes you up in the morning.

Leo: Bold fur carpets like a hot pink or thrashing purple. The ones you post on instagram with your new purchase of stilettos.

Virgo: The smell of coffee in Starbucks. Somehow it puts you in a good mood.

Libra: A China Set in some glass cabinet. It is your prized possession. 

Scorpio: The silence of yourself in a bath as you watch the water fill in your palm.

Sagittarius: The faint sound of a car speeding outside your window.

Capricorn: The dripping of a sink. It keeps you up all night. 

Aquarius: A lava lamp that is the only light provided in the room. It makes you feel so fucking cool.

Pisces: The beach after sunset. A dreary sky, almost indigo. The waters turn to a slight navy blue. .