Same adventure as my previous submission, this interaction takes place before that one by 1 session. Our half orc barbarian has a… quirk. He likes to skin monsters and make clothing out of them (he has a cloaker cloak, bugbear head he turned into a hat, dragon turtle scale shield, along with other miscellaneous articles of homemade clothes) and take the left hands of humans. This sometimes causes issues for us.
Barbarian: (to water cultists who ambushed us) Do you know who I am?
Cultists look at each other in confusion before their leader speaks up.
Cultist: No, should I?
B: I’m (name) the tailor!
Gm sighs and rolls dice: Take 10 damage.
B: I throw 9 of my severed hands (he had 27 at this point, in various states of decay) at them yelling “I just wanted to give you a HAND with your wardrobe!”
Gm: take another 20 damage. Also, 2 of the cultists crap themselves so violently at the sight of the decaying hands they die.
Rising from the water like rusty invaders out of H.G. Wells, the Maunsell Army Forts are decaying reminders of the darkest days of World War II. Part of the Thames Estuary defense network, the anti-aircraft tower-forts were constructed in 1942, with each fort consisting of a cluster of seven stilted buildings surrounding a central command tower. When operational, catwalks connected the buildings. The forts are now in varying states of decay. 📸: Photo by Steve Cadman.
history of this institution goes back to the days of Napoleon, who appointed
the castle as the beggars colony for this region. Such a colony harboured the
people living in the streets, who didn’t have any means of existance. In 1826
there were 236 people in this colony, most of which were incapable of working
in the fields. They were ‘blind, senseless, paralysed, deformed, deaf,
exhausted, or suffered from consumption, epilepsy or vomited blood’. The colony
was a village within the village: all the necessary crafts were there. There
was a farm and there was even an own fire department. As of 1920 the
institution was reformed into an insane asylum, which continued functioning as
an independent community. Shortly after this reform a substantial renovation
took place to meet the new needs towards nursing. The asylum sheltered the less
severe cases of insanity. In fact there was not a lot of treatment involved…
Halfway the 1960’s the institution got too small and a new building was
necessary. The move started mid 70’s and lasted until the end of the 80’s. Some
of the building that were vacated got repurposed. The castle is under
renovation, but the asylum itself is still in a state of decay. At the time of
my visit it had just been used for a wedding ceremony and the decoration hadn’t
been taken down yet, which resulted in a few fancy pictures…
I’ve passed by this R32 a few times over the past few years. Each time I do, the car looks in an even sorrier, and decayed state. The overgrown garden is slowly consuming it. It sits outside what looks like an abandoned house in a town in south-east Gunma. A friend of mine tells me it had been sitting there long before I moved to the area. I hope that one day, someone with the funds and the know-how can save it.
hello future drunk spooky, here is a prompt: skating family playing beer pong. they wager their medals
sorry this took so long! i vastly overestimate how fast I’m able to write sometimes.
“after the party is the after party”
The after, after party for the 2017 European Figure Skating Championships is carefully cultivated chaos.
Ignition (Remix) blares through blown out speakers. Someone—Chris—acquired a whiteboard from mysterious sources. All Victor knew was that Chris had returned with a whiteboard, a long skinny folding table, more plastic solo cups than a party supply store, three rubber ducks in various states of decay, a wizards hat, and arms laced with garters and glitter.
(The whiteboard was a much bigger surprise than the garters and glitter. He’s positive Chris packed those in his carry-on. No one was brave enough to ask about the ducks. Yuuri had slapped a hand over Victor’s mouth and kept it there even when Victor licked it.)
(It’s not like he wasn’t used to Victor’s saliva.)
Chris writes down sixteen names on slips of paper and stuffs them into the hat, picking teams of two at random. Victor and Phichit both pout when they’re paired with someone other than Yuuri.
Phichit’s caught between glee and frustration. “This is gonna be a blood bath.”
The team names appear from a mysterious source.
(Phichit fools no one.)
Round 1: Elimination
Match 1: Emil and Michele (Comedy and Tragedy) versus JJ and Isabella (Team JJ Style)
J.J. makes the sign of the cross then misses three trick shots.
Isabella takes out half of Emil and Michele’s rack.
Michele sighs in relief and returns to his life’s goal of usurping Sara’s shadow. Emil follows.
Winner: Team JJ Style
Match 2: Leo and Guang-Hong (Team Kitten Video) versus Phichit and Chris (Team #clapback)
“Calling a behind the back shot,” Phichit says, not bothering to look up from his phone before tossing the ball, and pressing record on his phone. It lands neatly in the cup at the tip of the pyramid. He uploads it to Instagram.
Leo and Guang-Hong go down easy.
(Neither seems very upset.)
Winner: Team #clapback
Match 3: Yurio and Victor (The Kitten and the Crone) versus Georgi and Seung-Gil (Team E.mo.tion)
(Victor cries foul at the team names.
“I am not a crone,” he sniffs, “and I resent the fact anyone thinks there’s a bigger Carly Rae stan than me.”
Yuuri pats Victor’s shoulder, not even bothering to stifle his laugher.
Yurio turns and glares at him, “you did this to yourself, Katsudon.”)
Victor’s luck doesn’t turn once the round starts. Yurio makes two out of his first three shots. Victor misses all but one.
“You can drink all the beer, since it’s the only thing you’re good at.”
“Excuse me, I have excellent hand eye coordination.” Victor sniffs. His eyes are glued to Yuuri, engaged in a conversation with Sara on the other side of the room, Michele hovering just behind.
On the other side of the table, Seung-Gil and Georgi have already started drinking. Georgi’s sobbing into his beer, Seung-Gil is staring at Phichit.
“Tell that to half the street lights in Saint Petersburg.” Yurio snarls, snapping a finger in front of Victor’s face, “Yakov should have sent you to obedience school instead of Makkachin.”
“Oh for fucks sake,” Yurio grabs a ping pong ball and tosses it towards the Georgi and Seung-Gil’s rack. He sinks it.
Winner: The Kitten and the Crone
Match 4: Yuuri and Otabek (The Odd Couple) versus Mila and Sara (Team Wonder Woman)
“We haven’t even gotten a shot in,” Mila says, eyebrow raised. Yuuri’s already cleared half their rack.
Victor wraps his arms around Yuuri’s waist from behind and Yuuri fumbles the ball into the cup in front of him.
“Really?” Yuuri sighs, then drinks it.
“We might have to give you a handicap,” Chris says, idling at the side of he table.
“He already has one,” Yurio says, “It’s called Victor Nikiforov.”
Winner: The Odd Couple
Round 2: Semi-Finals
Match 1: The Kitten and the Crone versus Team #clapback
“God you’re useless,” Victor’s on his second beer of this round. He’d have drunk more but Yurio had taken two for himself.
(“I’m paired with Victor. I’ve earned it.”)
They’re through to the championship round of the first annual European Figure Skating Championship Beer Pong Tournament.
“I am a champion,” Victor sniffs.
“Champion loser,” Yurio misses. He angrily sips his beer though the silly straw Victor had slipped into his drink when he wasn’t looking.
(He’d growled but still used it.)
“That doesn’t make any sense, Yurio. I know English isn’t your first language, but I’m pretty sure those are opposites,” Victor’s grin is insufferably smug.
“What doesn’t make any sense is how you’re so awful at beer pong. Where the fuck is all of your coordination?”
Victor taps his lips in thought, “must have used all of it on my quads.”
“Oh my god will you just take the next shot already?” Chris asks, twirling a garter around his fingers.
Victor takes it and misses.
“I call foul, Giacometti,” Yurio snarls, crushing the cup in his fist. Beer splashes everywhere.
“Oh, really,” Chris flutters his eyelashes. Yurio is unmoved. “Care to make this interesting then? Raise the stakes a little since your already so invested.”
“Tournament winner gets gold,” Chris looks at Victor, pointedly, “all of the golds.”
“I didn’t agree to this,” Victor protests.
They ignore him.
The match is tense, stretching into two rounds over sudden death overtime.
Yurio hangs onto their medals.
(With no help from Victor.)
Winner: The Kitten and The Crone
Match 2: Team JJstyle versus The Odd Couple
Otabek sinks two consecutive shots, one of them while Yuuri’s taking off his pants to tie them around his shoulders like a cape.
Victor’s been forcibly removed from Yuuri’s side and he’s pouting against a wall—which is as close as Otabek will let him get.
(Team JJstyle is still arguing for Victor as a handicap. Yurio wants to see JJ lose bad enough he actually argues against it.)
“What the fuck Beka, how are you so good at beer pong?” Yurio asks
“I used to train with JJ,” Otabek shrugs, “someone had to protect him before Isabella.”
To Otabek’s left, Yuuri makes three consecutive trick shots, pants-cape fluttering majestically behind him.
Otabek shoots him a deadpan thumbs up with Victor completes his transformation into the heart eyes emoji.
“I love you him even more now,” Victor stage whispers, fooling no one.
“He’s the enemy, asshole.”
“I’m so gay for him.”
“Literally no one was questioning that.”
Winner: The Odd Couple
Championship Round: The Odd Couple vs The Kitten and The Crone.
“You’re going down, Katsudon,” Yurio’s fingers are primed for action, even though Otabek and Yuuri won the garter toss for first shot.
“I wouldn’t mind that,” Victor slurs, eyes, tracking up Yuuri’s body to pause at his thighs.
“How the fuck am I the one who ended up with a handicap?”
“Luck of the draw,” Phichit chirps from his perch at by center of the table, sweeping his phone to take a panorama shot of the carnage.
“It was rigged,” Yurio mutters, as Yuuri sinks two shots, while Otabek makes his first and misses his second.
“Yuuri was really popular at parties in Detroit,” Phichit confides, “really really popular.” Victor face shifts to a bewildered blend of furious and horny.
“Way too much information,” Yurio fumes.
“Re-rack! Give us a….pyramid” Yuuri yells far louder than necessary. Victor sloshes beer all over the place in his haste to comply.
Yurio makes his shots, drunk on beer, adrenaline, and pettiness. Victor—miraculously—only misses one of his, leaving them tied.
“Don’t fuck this up, idiot.”
“So cruel! I am offended, Yurio. Who knows if I’ll ever recover,” Victor cries.
Yurio ignores him, “Re-rack. Same formation.”
Otabek re-arranges the cups.
Yurio, giddy as he ever gets, almost thinks he and the idiot can pull out a victory when Yuuri and Otabek each make both of their shots, get their balls back, and sink the last three before Victor and Yurio even have a chance.
Otabek just shrugs.
Victor is frozen as Yuuri stalks over, deliberate sway in his step, predator honing in on his prey. He slides up to Victor’s front, grabs the loose ends of his now un-tied tie good, and reels Victor in like the catch of the day.
A flush blooms across the tops of Victor’s cheekbones. Yuuri’s breath hits the side of Victor’s face, “now you have to marry me asshole. It’s…in the vows,” he slurs, “what’s yours is mine. Gimme all your gold.”
Victor shivers as Yuuri leans in to start pressing wet kisses against the side of his neck.
“Does anyone know a twenty four hour chapel in Ostrava?”
Culture Shock: Everything You Need To Know About ‘The Walking Dead’
The crème de la crème of post-apocalyptic horror series, The Walking Dead is not only a bona fide critical darling but also a full-out cultural phenomenon, with a massive legion of fans who endlessly obsess over the show well beyond its weekly airtime. If you’ve never immersed yourself in the series, here’s everything you need to know to hold your own in conversation.
The show is based on the comic strip Marmaduke: Anyone familiar with Marmaduke’s wacky capers with the Winslow family in the Sunday funny pages will certainly experience some déjà vu as they watch The Walking Dead’s cast of kooky zombies try to navigate life in the human world, as virtually all of the show’s plot points are taken directly from the classic syndicated comic strip. Lucky for fans of the series, creators say they have enough Marmaduke source material and madcap misadventures to make the series last at least 12 more seasons!
The show centers around Sheriff’s Deputy Rick Grimes, a character who possesses the world’s last remaining bottle of shampoo: All of the zombies have dry, brittle hair and desperately want to use Rick’s shampoo, leaving him constantly on the run from hordes of dandruffy zombies.
The whole show is probably just one big, fucking metaphor for something: You gotta figure, right? Maybe something with colonialism or climate change or us-versus-them political divisions or some shit? Whatever the fuck it is, there’s a cautionary tale in there somewhere.
In the Walking Dead universe there is no word for “zombie,” so the characters refer to them as apples in various states of decay: Tune into an episode for five minutes and you’re bound to hear a line or two like “That Honeycrisp is brown and ready for the compost bin” or “That Braeburn’s definitely got some soft spots” in reference to the zombie “walkers” plaguing the show’s dark and barren landscape. It definitely takes a bit of getting used to, but once you’ve got the lingo down, it makes the show all the more engrossing.
The characters in The Walking Dead are aware of Chris Hardwick’s Talking Dead aftershow and regard Hardwick as an omniscient but unfeeling god: All of the Walking Dead characters regularly watch Chris Hardwick’s official live aftershow Talking Dead, baffled that a perky comedian is dissecting their every action and laughing at their gruesome deaths. “If he knows so much,” Rick is often heard to mumble, “then why doesn’t he help us?”
The crew gets meat at midnight, but they never can go far. They hold each other too close and lie about who they are. Rows of perfect houses, but the mothers still want more. They chain smoke in the bedroom and there’s fights behind the door.
But fate is a cruel mistress, girl, the prettiest in the world. She dresses loosely in a bathrobe with her hair up in curls. Because we were kissing for hours with her hands in my trousers, she could not contain herself, suggests we go back to her house. But here it comes, this is the crux, she vomits down my rental tux.
Milkshakes and cat eyes, lipstick and french fries. Internalize so much but so little. Don’t make us feel belittled world. Sneaking cigarrettes at lunchtime, sun feels safe and sublime. Pink sparkly sunglasses, lemonade by the pool.
And all we see, are kids in buses longing to be free. Some cities make you lose your head, endless suburbs stretched out thin and dead. And what was that line you said? Wishing you were anywhere but here. You watch the life you’re living disappear. And now I see, we’re still kids in buses longing to be free.
Once again I find myself in an insane asylum… Does anyone else begin to see a pattern here? :-)
vast neotraditional ensemble was built in the 1920’s as a neuro-psychiatric
hospital and consists of several pavilions in the northern part of the park
surrounding the castle de Spoelbergh. The pavilions are separated by a
rectilinear pattern of alleys, a remainder of the original 19th century
landscaping of the castle park. After Karel de Spoelbergh died in 1907 without
descendants, the castle and park became the property of the nearby university.
It was given in leasehold to the Sisters of Charity to establish an insane
asylum. The clinic became part of the university psychiatric department until
the several divisions were divided over different hospitals by the end of the
1990’s. The last pavilion was closed in 2007. The pavilions all have a H-shaped
plan. They are functional, brick constructions of two to three floors with mostly saddle and
shield roofs. The
site is momentarily under renovation and is being developed into a housing
project. The work on some of the pavilions has already been finished and they
are now inhabited by young families. This particular pavilion, Saint-Cecile, is
the last building that is still in a state of decay.