<b>The Phantom Menace:</b> tries to flirt with the queen of Naboo. tells the Jedi Council he is "cold" when asked how he feels. 7/10 bc he is smol and good and the jedi are mean to him<p/><b>Attack of The Clones:</b> hates sand. "just being around her is...intoxicating." cries a lot. "I'm haunted by that kiss...that you should *never* have given me" anakin pls. 37/10 for pining Anakin.<p/><b>The Clone Wars:</b> now has an Edgy™ scar. causes many explosions and bad jokes. most problems he runs into are because he's v bad at hiding his marriage, fuckin dork. 9/10<p/><b>Revenge of the Sith:</b> where do i even begin. anakin NO 100/10<p/><b>Star Wars Rebels:</b> stands on top of a TIE fighter and flies it with the Force just so his cape can flap in a Cool™ way. 78/10<p/><b>Rogue One:</b> uses the Force to make his cloak flap, makes choking puns to scare Krennic. turns lights off of chest panel just to scare Rebels. literally has his fortress in the same place he fought (and lost) to Obi-Wan. a solid 59/10.<p/><b>A New Hope:</b> chokes people who insult the force. says "the circle is complete" & "when i left you, i was but the learner. now i am the Master!!". 12/10.<p/><b>The Empire Strikes Back:</b> Literally sits and waits at a dinner table so that he can surprise Han & Leia when Lando invites them to dinner??? also cuts off his own sons hand before revealing he is his father. unbeatable extra™-ness, 126/10<p/><b>Return of the Jedi:</b> chooses to redeem himself at the very last minute for the ultimate Dramatic Twist. burns on a pyre of flames. a good 30/10<p/></p>
all the telepaths aboard the enterprise always either look at spock weird or are very amused by him but none of them will tell why and it’s because despite spock’s stoic façade he is in fact just constantly screaming in his head
Here’s a happier thought: in another world, things are different.
Darth Vader takes one look at this feral fierce daughter of queens and politicians, this girl lying silver-tongued and spiteful to his face and thinks oh. And a heartbeat later he thinks Padme because this child looks so much like her, down to the imperious jut of her chin. And she looks like a boy he knew once, a boy called Anakin Skywalker, who was reckless and absurd and so strong with the Force that the universe buckled around him.
He says, “You are adopted, aren’t you,” and Leia’s eyebrows skyrocket.
“What relevance does that have,” she manages, “Lord Vader,” and Lord Vader would smile if he could. Instead he reaches down to touch her beautiful face; she flinches away, shows her teeth, and he feels his heart full up to bursting point.
He says, “None at all.”
Alderaan does not burn. Tarkin does though. He falls in two neat, sizzling halves.
“Um,” says Leia. Vader’s lightsabre burns red in her eyes.
“I’m no friend of the Emperor,” says Vader, says Anakin. And, “I knew your mother.” And then, because he’s Anakin Skywalker and planning has never been one of his strong suits, he offers her his hand.
“Come with me.”
“Will Alderaan be safe? My parents?”
My parents. Not by blood, but by choice, and that matters more.
Fans: OMG, “The Last Jedi”??? But is that singular, or plural??? Disney: I don’t knoooOoooOooOooow, is it?? :D :D :D Foreign markets: No, we actually need to know. Disney: … Foreign markets: … Disney: …FINE :<