Lieutenant Hux gets a mission to pick up an asset for the Supreme Leader from the ruins of a massacred temple, and the entire course of his life is changed in one moment by the appearance of a bloodstained boy who calls himself Ben. A series of meetings and chance encounters throughout the years draw the two of them together again and again, as their relationship shifts from almost friends to enemies to something else entirely.
galactic discourse and conspiracy theories in star wars
[0300 tinfoil hat blogging voice] alright now bear with me everyone but consider this: you know how leia organa doesnt look anything like the queen and vicroy? what if (what if) shes actually the child who supposedly died with senator amidala of naboo and the organas took her in to hide her from the emperor
[co-conspirator who’s also awake at 0300 and had too much caf] okay let’s say that youre right - who’s her father??
[original blogger, tinfoil hat on more firmly than ever] okay hold on to your hats younglings but consider: you know how at the height of the clone wars she was always mentioned with anakin skywalker and there were all of these conspiracy theories and fansites that were convinced they were sleeping together? what if it’s skywalker! and thats another reason to hide leia from the emperor! she’s the daughter of a jedi!!!!!!!!
[obligatory nay-sayer voice] what?!?! please if the amidala was sleeping with anyone it was obviously skywalker’s master obi wan kenobi i mean cmon
[orginal blogger, now getting heated] princess leia looks nothing like kenobi! just look at old holos of skywalker and amidala! she looks just like them!!!! not to mention skywalker (much to obi wan “the negotiator” kenobi’s consternation) had a rather infamous temper and (if the gossip sources are to be believed) so does the princess of alderaan
[co-conspirator, now feeling the need to come to their friend’s aid] now im not saying that this is all 100% Proven but theres nothing that says princess leia cant be the child of padme amidala and anakin skywalker adopted by the alderaanian royal family to hide her from the emperor
[obigatory nay-sayer] okay you have me there but (!) what about luke skywalker? the kid who is literally claiming to be anakin skywalker’s kid and was apparently hidden on some backwater outer rim planet by obi wan kenobi for 19 years????? check and mate
[random person whos’s been watching this whole exchange] okay but hear me out okay? what if…………theyre twins and were separated at birth so they could be better hidden from the emperor and vader
honest to god………. finn is probably my favorite all time star wars character, he’s so goddamn well written with such a range of emotion and motives and morals and beliefs and john boyega is such a brilliant actor GOD I just
The assignment was to do a complete character analysis of any character my students wanted. The only real ‘rules’ were that it had to be at least three pages and have direct examples and evidence from the source material. (Page numbers, times, quotes, that kind of thing)
I can tell some students were kissing my ass with some of their papers, focusing on characters they know I like, (Most Star Wars characters, Draco, Luna, Katara) that kind of thing. But I’m grading one right now and like I don’t know if he realises that he didn’t edit this out but he starts off the paper like “Miss Draco I know my friends are writing about why Star Wars characters are so great, but honestly they’re only saying that to get a good grade from you. I’m here to be your reality check and explain to you why Kylo Ren is human trash.”
But halfway through he just… “this dude isn’t even all that bad wtf he just wants his gf that shit ain’t cool tho bro. You gotta finesse the ladies not kidnap them” and it’s turned into a total pro-Kylo paper and I’m only on page 6/14.