lance: luigi with the wild wing. whispers “gotta go fast” every time he passes someone. he’s the person that has to be playing his usual character to win, and he WILL make you change if you try to take his character. occasionally chooses funky kong if he feels like being a meme instead of trying to win
hunk: rosalina with the standard kart. whenever someone calls him out for choosing the most basic vehicle he launches into 5 minute speech about how it’s the most well-rounded kart and therefore the most efficient. has said on multiple occasions that the Rosalina’s cute star friend saved his life
pidge: character varies widely, but she tends to use bikes more than karts. will choose waluigi and turn up the volume so you can hear his haunting laugh behind you as he approaches. chaotic evil.
keith: none of those mainstream characters, its dry bowser or nothing. will choose some huge bike for the aesthetic and end up turning too hard because he’s used to karts (he drives best with the wild wing and will switch to baby bowser if he needs to wipe the floor with his opponent). roars along with bowser then starts giggling. every. time.
shiro: rotates between the tiny characters and different vehicles. there’s really no reasoning to it he just. decided he’d choose a tiny character one day because no one else would. surprisingly good with the duck bike.