srsly not ok

club penguin bans sentence starters
  • "i'm a fucking piece of pizza,"
  • "holy shit toto, we sure as fuck ain't in kansas anymore,"
  • "i ain't fucking with these christmas lights anymore,"
  • "why is the only angry one black?"
  • "get in loser, we're going sledding,"
  • "jesus fucking christ, that cookie hot as shit,"
  • "ah yes, my meth lab is ready,"
  • "i need this life vest 'cos i'm drowning in the pussy,"
  • "i could kill you right now, no one would wear you scream,"
  • "i could go back and pretend to be you,"
  • "fashion police, you're definitely under arrest,"
  • "you're tearing this family apart, ___"
  • "what do you mean you're being murdered? that's illegal, people can't do that,"
  • "i'm wanted for stealing yo girl/boy,"
  • "wanna hear a joke? your future,"
  • "i would like to order all the money,"
  • "when i see stars i think of you. because you're only beautiful from a distance,"
  • "do it for the vine,"
  • "you dress like an idiot,"
  • "girl/boy, are you because i want to take you out,"
  • "hey you forgot something. your social life,"
  • "help me hide this body in here,"
  • "did you just propose, using emojis?"
  • "do drugs they said. it will be fun they said,"
  • "it's called capitalism,"
  • "thank you for helping me commit cannibalism,"
  • "shit, we on national television,"
  • "bitch, throw one more snowball at me,"
  • "can you leave my house please?"
  • "i'm sensing you're a bit of a bitch,"
  • "can i pay you in swag?"
  • "excuse me, do you know where i can find the booty?"
  • "what the flipper?"
  • "santa isn't real,"
  • "what do penguins do in a race? they peng-win,"
  • "a milkshake ain't a goddamn pizza,"
  • "locked up because my eyebrow game was too strong,"
  • "man, look at all this fuckin' dope,"
  • "fuck it, i ain't running,"
  • "hey, do you wanna join my gang?"
  • "i'll ask my mom,"
  • "smooth as butter,"
6
  • Sarada: (frowning)
  • ChoCho: Sarada, do you want some chips?
  • Sarada: Not really, ChoCho, why do you ask?
  • ChoCho: Because you act too much like your dad when you're hungry.
  • Sarada: Oh. (eats a potato chip)
  • ChoCho: Better?
  • Sarada: (smiles brightly, like her mom) Better.
shinee goes on a midnight adventure (at taemin’s suggestion)

taemin:

  • shinee: “taemin-ah………………….. this is paris baguette” 
  • tae: yep 
  • ot4: “you said we were going on an adventure and kept saying trust the drive over wHY are we at a paris baguette” 
  • tae: *jazz hands* ~adventure~
  • buys a loaf of bread 
  • tbh he just needed to buy bread for toast and it’s fun to buy things in the middle of the night 
  • but FINE
  • hands out slices of bread to quit their complaining 
  • honestly if they didn’t want to come they could have not come (ot4: you herded us into your car and drove away / minho: *head pops up* i was promised ice cream) 
  • buckles the seat belt over his loaf in the car 

onew:

  • ???? 
  • it’s 12 
  • since when was paris baguette open this late
  • staring helplessly at the menu bc all the good breads are gone (even the choco cones noooooo) and he can’t even get coffee at this hour taemin why would you do this to him 
  • stressed (jong: you ok??? / onew: i don’t knOW what i want)
  • should…. he buy a cake? is that an appropriate response to this situation
  • thank god they head over to the convenience store (jong: just back away from the cakes hyung) 
  • happily makes the got7 mark meal (ot4: you know how to make that??? / onew: it’s almost as if i have a magical box called a smartphone and can access the internet!!!! and get the recipe!!!! wow what a concept!!! / taemin: …. i politely decline to drive you back / onew: no wait) 

jonghyun:

  • taemin cannot be trusted 
  • in a huge sweater so he tucked his hands into the sleeves and keeps slapping any member in the near vicinity with his large penguiny arms (minho: *ties the arms together* / jong: well, fuck) 
  • pulling only made the knot tighter
  • aegyo-ing so someone will untie him
  • no mercy tho (free jonghyun sos) 
  • while struggling: “OMG SRSLY I WANT SNACKS TOO”
  • taemin takes his wallet from his back pocket (tae: *waving jong’s credit card* jonghyunnie hyung is buying~~~~~~~ / ot3: WHOOOOOOO) 
  • AGAIN. TAEMIN. CANNOT. BE. TRUSTED.
  • actually did end up paying tho even when he was (finally) freed
  • no one actually untied him he just realized he could just take off the sweater and problem solved (key: *whispers* ……..babo) 
  • throws corn chips at tae’s head while he drives 

key:

  • can’t believe they actually left home to do this, these frikken weirdos he associates himself with 
  • there’s little clay dinosaur keychains that are next to the cashier and he is sweating trying to convince himself that he should not buy them omg
  • casually grocery shopping at the mart 
  • minho peeks into his basket: “milk, eggs, ketchup???” / key: let me live 
  • why is his basket so heavy 
  • looks down and there are sausages, chips, and string cheese that he did not put in there
  • ot4 were playing a game to see how much food they could get in before he notices 
  • they’ve gotten real good at acting innocent that he’s not sure exactly who started it but he just blames taemin and makes him carry the basket from then on (taemin: WAI / key: if it isn’t directly your fault, it’s indirectly your fault, so in conclusion it’s your fault) 

minho:

  • armful of energy drinks like yes i’m going to need all of these
  • “i’m calling collect on the ice cream you promised me tae” / taemin: *slides over jong’s card* / minho: “pleasure doing business”
  • comes back biting into a jaws bar (it’s a sherbet-y orange/strawberry flavored bar that’s shaped like a shark! v good) 
  • so since they came out here (key: we’re 5 mins from our dorm) they should just chill (key: we could walk back if we wanted to) 
  • there’s a street vendor near by so he buys odaeng (fishcake) and fried things and they all sit at the tables outside the convenience store eating them 
  • he bought each member the drink they like (srsly after 12 years of knowing each other it’s like second nature) and passes them out 
  • this is actually pretty nice (taemin: YES ADVENTURE~~~ SUCCESS)