hi! my name is DEADNAME
i hear it resonate through my dysphoria i recoil from my body i desperately want to hold a match stick up to my birth certificate and watch every letter blacken into ash, when i grow up to be a tombstone i want you to burn me too ignite all the dresses i wore to church
my name is WOMAN and
no matter how many times i insist that it is not i will be categorized with a quaking punch in my stomach and i will throw up SHE no matter how many times i jam this hoodie into a washing machine it will reek of MISS i am cloaked with words of caution to the public (WARNING: GENDER-NONCONFORMING) in attempts to subdue the truth because if it unraveled i would be myself and myself will shatter minds and destroy virtue because my psyche is a crime scene my humanity is a dangerous opinion and my identity is a car crash it is a siren wailing magenta it wraps around my chest like police tape i wish i could use it as a binder those knuckles feel infinitely more therapeutic than the aftershock of FEMALE i would much rather be bruised and downtrodden and battered and beaten from every centimeter of my body than to submit to the declarations of GIRL i want you to punch me again please punch me again please punch me again please punch me again please punch me again please
my name is DELUSIONAL and
i heal paper cuts with bow ties because it’s as close as i can get to a suit when me and my wardrobe are confined within the same nine square feet of wooden floor and i still come close to weeping when i get my flu shot but fill that syringe with testosterone and by god you can slay me like a beast, skewer that needle through my skin like a katana and i will embrace it i will live for the torment, pretty hurts and by god i am a masochist, to mask the sting by god i will sing like a gospel, a gospel who gets called handsome by strangers and owns a voice deep as a goddamned ravine
my name is SNOWFLAKE and
i hope i give you hypothermia, asshole.
my name is PUSSYBOY and
i drank too much lemonade at the movie theater so i must make a choice whether to get scolded and renamed PERVERT or to get pummeled until i piss myself so i decide to just wait until i get home, i look in my desk during a geometry lesson and i discover a sticky note that threatens to make my name another hashtag, the beginning of a dozen breaking news articles titled TRANNY TEEN TO BE SCROLLED PAST (followed by either victorious chuckle or exhausted sigh)
my name is YOUNG LADY and
while filling out my passport application i flooded the box with an M beside it with ink and never told my mother and i smiled to myself for the first time that week and i still don’t regret it i will never regret it because no matter how many times i hear edicts of DAUGHTER she can never take that precious M away from me
my name is SINNER and
i am a disgrace to faith a mutant a freak an abomination a monstrosity not a man just a girl who aspires to mutilate herself into an excuse for one i am a shapeshifting sorcerer you see LESS THAN HUMAN little do you know i am a FUCKING DEMIGOD and i may be the owner of weeping willow twigs for arms and i may be left on the brink of passing out when i climb up the stairs but i will grip you by the collar of your shirt and haul you into hell with me on the other side of this mirror, by god
my name is MATT.
i found this out at age fourteen. i deciphered myself at age fourteen. it’s just one syllable. it is a firecracker mistaken for a gunshot and i will leave cisnormativity riddled with bullets and the pistol’s name will be MATT, a kid from middle school will run into me on the street and tell me they can’t quite remember what my name is and i’ll shamelessly rewrite history and remind them, it’s MATT, a lady at starbucks will ask what to write on my cup and i will say MATT and she’ll spell it with one T instead of two because you know how starbucks is but i honestly won’t give a shit, it’s good enough, i will scream my revelation from my fire escape at four in the morning in triumph MY NAME IS MATT and someone will yell back from their car HEY MATT, SHUT THE FUCK UP and i’ll take it as a tribute, MATT is a MAN and HE sliced his body open and poured ecstasy inside when a cashier called him SIR that one time at walgreens, MATT is yet another piece of proof that the assignment received by some fucker in a lab coat doesn’t have to be a prison and you don’t fully understand these boxes we’re crammed in until you break them yourself, MATT’S individuality is authentic HIS love is authentic HIS reflection in the mirror is authentic and its name is MATT, MATT found out the life expectancy of a transgender person is around thirty-two years old and you better believe that MATT will live to be thirty-three and HE will give a little bit of hope to trans youth who don’t even think they’ll be able to wake up to sixteen and HE will give a big ol’ fuck you to everyone who doesn’t think HE deserves to breathe in their world for that long, by god, you better believe that MATT will live to be thirty-three, you better believe that MATT will make it to thirty-three, you better believe that HE will make it to thirty-three, you better believe that I will make it to thirty-three
Imagine: Fooling around with Sam after Dean falls asleep.
Pairing: Sam x Reader
Notes: I wrote this at 3 am.
“Can you guys shut the hell up? I’m trying to sleep.” Dean groaned from the couch. He had chosen to sleep in the living room because he had spilt water all over his bed.
You rolled your eyes and Sam smirked, looking back down the the game you were seated around. You were bored and found some old timey board game, Sam suggested you try it out. You replied with a ‘why not’. It was pretty dumb, a basic roll the dice move your piece kind of thing.
“How about we make it a bit more interesting.” You huffed in boredom as you moved your piece up three squares.
Sam looked up to you, adjusting his legs. The floor was a bit uncomfortable but it was in the middle of the living room, so you had plenty of space. You would have used a table but the board was way too big to fit on any table in the bunker. “How so?” He asked with an amused smile on his face.
You smiled innocently, shrugging it. Looking back to Dean to make sure he was asleep, you leaned closer to Sam. Locking eyes with him your smile turned not so innocent. “If one of us rolls a five, we remove one article of clothing. The other player gets to choose.”
Sam rolled his eyes. “Seriously? Are you twelve?” He asked but when he saw you were deadly serious he swallowed hard and looked over to Dean, who was snoring. He sighed before his hazel eyes flicked back over to you. “Alright, sure. You first.”
You smiled and changed sitting positions, now sitting on your feet. You shook the dice in your hands and let it fall on the board with a clatter. You rolled a three and a six. You smirked in triumph and moved your piece up nine squares.
Time was slow as Sam picked up the two small cubes, shook them in his hands and let them fall onto the board. A four and a two. You mentally cursed and Sam saw your look of disappointment, smirking and shaking his head as he moved his piece.
The process repeated until you finally rolled a five. You hadn’t counted on you being the first to roll a five. And two, at that. Your cheeks heated up and you looked up at Sam. He was smirking, a look of smug success on his face.
“Screw you.” You laughed quietly and looked back to Dean, who had his face planted in his pillow. He was fast asleep. And thankfully he was a deep sleeper when he knew Sam was awake.
“Socks.” Sam said and you looked back to him, raising a brow. He just shrugged. “Don’t wanna start off too quickly, or we’d be naked in three turns.” He said and your cheeks heated up as he spoke. He sure was serious about the situation.
You took your feet out from under your thighs and removed your pink socks, tucking them into each other and tossing it towards the dining room. You’d get them later. You smirked once you were done, but the look on Sam’s face got you worried.
“And, your shirt.” He said and your breath caught in your throat. Blood started to flow between your legs and you looked at Dean again, which was starting to get annoying. Sam noticed your hesitation. “Want to go to my room?” He offered and you tried not to whimper in excitement.
You just nodded and grabbed the two dice, your two player pieces, and let Sam grab the board. The walk to his room was silent and full of tension, as you walked up the stairs you could feel him staring at you and it made your movements hurt in anticipation.
When you finally got into his room he shut the door behind you, locking it. The pieces in your hands felt extremely heavy as Sam laid out the large board on his floor, sitting down cross legged. He looked up to you and you swallowed, sitting down in the same position as you. When he didn’t speak you remembered you were supposed to take off your shirt.
You looked down to your button up silk nightshirt nervously, your trembling hands reaching up to the bottom button. It slipped out of the hole with ease and you continued on upwards, the last button leaving you almost bare. You had forgotten you had a tank top on under it and you almost laughed at the irony, you were so scared for nothing. You threw the shirt behind you, the cool air raising goosebumps on your newly exposed arms and shoulders.
Sam smirked, rolling his eyes. “Fair enough.” He sighed and put the pieces back where they were, picking up the two dice cubes. He shook them in his palms and let them loose with a deafening clack on the wooden board. You leaned forward with your heart pounding. A five and a two. You looked up to him with a wicked, cocky grin.
“Shirt.” You said and leaned back with your arms crossed, confidence back. But it quickly faded as Sam pulled the plain tee-shirt over his head, his practically impossibly perfect muscles making your mouth water. He was golden tan, his skin littered with a few scars here and there but otherwise perfect. Of course, he noticed you staring and he smiled, looking down. His smile wasn’t cocky anymore, he looked bashful. Sam Winchester? Bashful? Hah! That’s funny.
But when you saw the blush on his cheeks you knew that it was exactly his current emotion. Your heart lurched and you smiled, he was so cute it broke your heart.
“Your turn.” He said as he moved his pieces and you snapped out of your daze, picking up the two dice. You shook and rolled, getting a two and a three. You sighed in disappointment and moved your pieces, handing the dice to Sam. He got a four and a six, which seemed to disappoint him as well, and he handed them back to you.
You almost prayed as you let the dice roll out of your hands. They flipped and spun, finally deciding to land on a five and a three. You moved your pieces and looked up, biting your lip. “Pants.” Your voice was barely a whisper and he swallowed hard, glancing down at his sweatpants.
“What have you gotten me into?” He muttered to himself and you bit your bottom lip, watching him as he stood up and untied the strings on his gray pants. He let them fall and he kicked them away, staring at you and waiting for a reaction.
Your throat and mouth dried, everything seeming to freeze. He was so beautiful it was unbelievable. His legs were toned as well, his boxers hiding too much. When he sat back down you suddenly felt you were wearing too much and you hoped he’d roll two fives.
Your wish came true as he let the dice fall, the tension so thick you could taste it. His eyes flickered up to yours, which were glued to the five black dots on both white dice. You slowly looked up, licking your lips and waiting for him to speak.
“Shorts.” He said and you struggled to stand, the undeniable lust making you shake. Your fingers went to the hem of your pajama shorts, slipping them into the waistband. You took your time sliding them down your thighs, letting them pool around your ankles. You kicked them away, right next to Sam’s sweatpants, and you sat back down cross-legged.
Sam’s eyes shamefully landed between your legs, which were giving him a perfect view. He shifted, swallowing hard as he looked back up to you. “Tank-top.” His voice was deep now, deep and serious. You shuddered at his voice, chills running up your spine as you grabbed the bottom of your tank-top and pulled it over your head. You heard him sigh as you threw it behind you, his eyes roaming over your bare chest. He licked his lips and looked up to you, his eyes flittering around nervously. If you hadn’t known Sam for so long you’d think he was a virgin.
You didn’t know what to say so you reached out to grab the dice but Sam’s hand grabbed your wrist, stopping you and startling you at the same time. You looked up with furrowed brows, a question forming on your lips but Sam stopped you.
“I think, we both know it isn’t about this stupid game anymore.” Sam said breathlessly, looking into your eyes. Your lips parted and your breath caught in your throat, his gaze was so intense it shook you. You could feel wetness forming between your legs and you closed your eyes, letting out a sigh. This was so much you could orgasm right then and there.
You nodded at his words and Sam leaned forward, smashing his lips against yours. His lips were so soft and plump, they matched your perfectly and you sighed into his mouth. He used one hand to run through your hair and the other to steady you at the small of your back so you didn’t fall backwards. He gasped in pain as the player piece dug angrily into his thigh and you looked down, smiling nervously. “Bed?” You asked and he nodded, grimacing.
You stood up and all but flung yourself onto his soft, comfortable bed, your legs spread wide and eager for him. His mouth gaped open and you felt self conscious for a moment, but it all ceased when you noticed his erection through his boxers. He walked forward, sinking his knees into the bed and settling between your thighs. He leaned down to kiss you, using his hands to pull your thighs around his waist. Through both of your underwear you could feel each other so well, you knew you wouldn’t be able to hold off your orgasm long once he was inside you.
Once his lips touched yours again he slowly rubbed his hips between your legs, stimulating you immensely. You gasped into his kiss, arching your back and fumbling to grab at his hair. Once you got hold of it you tugged and he groaned, removing his lips from yours to find a new target. He sunk his teeth into your neck, gently biting down as he thrusted against you. You cried out, rubbing yourself on his erection, trying hard to get any friction you could.
“Sam, enough of this.” Your voice was a whisper as he kissed and sucked on your shoulders. “Make love to me.” You said and he sat up, looking down to you.
“You’re so beautiful.” He said as he smiled, taking his boxers off. He took the liberty of taking your own underwear off, tossing it over his shoulder. He wasted no time in slipping two fingers inside you, causing you to gasp sharply. He closed his eyes and groaned feeling how tight you were around your fingers. “(Y/N), you feel so good.”
“I’ll feel even better wrapped around your cock, fuck me Sam.” You groaned and he happily obliged, settling again between your thighs and rubbing his tip against you. You gasped and moaned, hungrily biting your lip and reaching up to sink your nails into his shoulders. He pushed his head inside you, stretching you almost painfully. He waited a moment before continuing to push, finally buried to the hilt. You didn’t dare move, you knew if you did you’d cum. And you wanted to hold off on it as long as possible.
He waited painfully long before he started moving, yanking your thighs up to him. You cried out in surprise at the new angle, his head rubbed against that perfect spot and you felt yourself starting to approach your orgasm. Sam felt you tighten around his cock and he started slowly, deeply thrusting, making sure to roll his hips in a way to hit your magic spot every thrust. You soon came, toppling over that high edge. Your body stiffened and you shook, gasping and letting out a short groan before you went slack onto the mattress.
“Already?” Sam teased and you were tempted to slap him. But when you opened his eyes and saw his sunflower eyes and his dimpled smile, you couldn’t help but smile back.
“You don’t know how beautiful you are, Sam.” You said quietly and he started to move again.
“Keep talking.” He whispered with closed eyes and you grinned suddenly. Sam had a praise kink. You couldn’t blame him, he wasn’t appreciated enough.
“You’re so gorgeous, not only on the outside, but in as well.” You panted as he thrusted inside you, slowly speeding up. Your body rocked back and forth on the mattress and you moaned. “God Sam, you’re perfect, so good, you’re so good and pure. My pure Sam.” Your voice got choppy as he sped up, thrusting harder and faster. Your cries turned to loud grunts that you couldn’t hold back, deep guttural growls emerging from Sam’s throat.
He thrusted inside you for god knows how long, it felt like hours of pure heaven. In that time you praised him, kissed him egged him on until he finally came with a loud groan inside you. His muscles seemed to bulge out from his skin and you watched him cum, the sight of it forcing you to orgasm as well. You both panted, coming down from your high, sweaty and exhausted.
When you were back to your senses you sat up, running a hand through your sweaty hair. You looked at Sam, gleaming with sweat, naked on his bed for you. You smiled at his beauty, which caught his eye and he smiled back.
“I liked that game.” He said quietly, tired from his orgasm.
“I liked it too.” You agreed and stretched, standing up to pick up your underwear. Sam sat up with furrowed brows, watching you step into them.
“Are you going to your room?” He asked cautiously and you picked up a hint of disappointment in his questioning voice.
“Well, I didn’t know if you wanted me to stay or not. I don’t want to be that annoying one time thing who thinks they can stay.” You said, looking anywhere but at him.
“It wasn’t a one time thing.” Sam said quietly. “I mean, I hope it wasn’t. I really like you. And the things you said about me… Well, I’m not good with words. I get shy. Can you just… turn off the light and sleep with me?” He asked in a hopeful voice and you almost cried at how adorable he sounded. He looked at you with puppy eyes and you smiled, nodding.
“I’ll sleep with you tonight. Scooch over.” You stepped back out of your shorts and turned off the lights before climbing into bed with him, wrapping the sheets over your naked bodies. Sam wrapped an arm around you and you rested your head on his chest, falling asleep to the steady beat of his heart.
The Dolomites cover an area totaling 1,419 square kilometers and includes nine mountain ranges. Eighteen of the mountain peaks in the Dolomites have an elevation of over 3,000 metres. The mountains, known for their rocky wall faces, glacial peaks, and lush forests, are not only made from dolomite, but also limestone.
Mountain climbing, skiing, cycling, paragliding and hiking are all popular activities for tourists in this region.
Lila decided that opera cakes were a pretty safe option to go with.
She only ever visited Paris once in her life before moving here – a short vacation away from Sicily when her mom was still around and her father hadn’t started moving around for work yet – and one of the few things she remembered was the small box of opera cakes they’d gotten at a bakery. They were cut into neat three square centimeter pieces, and for six year old Lila, they were the closest thing to tiramisu that France had.
It was a silly thing from her childhood, but it was an honest and sincere piece of her that seemed like the perfect thing to try and give back to others. Not that anyone would necessarily know that, but it was the thought that counted. So she’d gone into a quaint bakery right across the street from school and ordered two boxes of opera cakes with hyacinths and white chocolate designs drawn on the tops. Maybe the whole flower symbolism thing was a little heavy handed, but Lila could use all the help she could get at this point.
On the day when she was meant to pick them up, Lila’s nerves had made her get on the bus sooner than she meant to and catch the bakery only five minutes after it opened. She squinted through the glass and past the Tom & Sabine’s logos painted on the door, seeing no one inside. After jiggling the knob and knocking a couple of times yielded no answer, she contemplated walking off her overeagerness in the park nearby and trying not to hype up something as innocuous as pastries in her head. But, right as she was about to leave, a small figure quickly sped around the counter inside, fiddled with the keys in their hands, and pushed the door open.
“Sorry about that! We’re still prepping and we don’t usually get customers quite this – Lila?”
Lila blinked at the young girl standing in front of her and immediately recognized her from her class. She floundered for a bit and tried to remember her name. “U-Um….it’s Marinette, right?”
“Yeah,” Marinette breathed out. “Uh…hi? What are you doing here so early?”
“What are you doing here?” Lila countered. “Do you work here or something?”
I don’t understand all the fuss about prequel/ sequel.
Sure Lis bts is a prequel made by Deck Nine for Square Enix, nothing to do with Dontnod, but even if Square Enix is out for money ( guess what!) I am truly happy I will be given the chance to play once again in Arcadia Bay especially given the opportunity to fill the gaps and meet Rachel Amber.
Of course I’m disappointed Ashly Burch won’t voice Chloe but at least she has taken part in shaping her in this prequel too. It looks like Dontnod sequel won’t center around our beloved characters (I can see why) so I cross my fingers and hope for the best Chloe / Rachel / Arcadia Bay storyline.