sqornshellous zeta

Everyone's jumping to conclusions.

Having two suns does not make a planet Gallifrey; it could just as easily be Tatooine.

Given the recent discovery of a diamond planet and the implication that Tatooine is not within the Milky Way Galaxy, the former does seem more plausible. However, I won’t make any more judgements until we receive word on the color of the planet’s skies.

Or maybe I’m just upset we haven’t found Magrathea.

My dad’s waiting for the discovery of Sqornshellous Zeta and its docile mattresses named Zem.

At least we’ll find Clom; we put a Disneyland over there in the future.

Wikipedia definition of Mattresses (in the Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy)

Mattresses are friendly, dim-witted, docile creatures capable of speech. They are all called Zem and live in the swamps of Sqornshellous Zeta. Many of them are slaughtered, dried out, and shipped around the Galaxy to be slept on by grateful customers, though they do not appear to mind this, one noting that since they are all called Zem they never know which of them have been killed anyway. Their main appearance is in Life, the Universe and Everything when a particular mattress (called Zem, like the rest) has a chapter-long conversation with Marvin.

Many of the movements they make or sounds they produce, such as gupping, willomying and flolloping, are so unique that etymologists have driven themselves half-insane tracking down new words for them. Words associated mainly/only with them include:

  • Flollop (v.)
  • Flurble (v./n.)
  • Flur (v.)
  • Floopy (adj.)
  • Globber* (v.)
  • Glurry (v.)
  • Gup (v.)
  • Lurgle (v.)
  • Quirrule (v.)
  • Vollue (v.)
  • Voon (interj.)
  • Willomy (v.)
  • Wurf (v.)

* Globber can also, according to the Ultra-Complete Maximegalon Dictionary of Every Language Ever, mean the noise made by the Lord High Sanvalvwag of Hollop on discovering that he has forgotten his wife’s birthday for the second year running. Since there was only ever one Lord High Sanvalvwag of Hollop and he never married, the word is only used in a negative or speculative sense, and there is an ever-increasing body of opinion that holds that the Ultra-Complete Maximegalon Dictionary is not worth the fleet of trucks it takes to cart its microstored edition around in.