sprankles

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Coconut-Chocolate Dipped Cones with Homemade Sprinkles

While we may wax poetic about the works of beauty created by Christina Tosi, Amanda Rockman, and Dana Cree: there is no dessert finer* than a dipped cone covered in sprinkles.

Dipped cones are the quintessential dessert of our childhoods. Even though we grew up in different epicenters of corn and rural culture, we both spent our tweens reading books at the local pool and buying DQ with pennies saved from couches and locker room floors. That preciously scavenged buck made the sweaty midwestern boredom of August afternoons tenable– and if we could find that extra ten-cents for a side of sprinkles to dip, they transformed to pure fucking magic.

As adults, we still love the stuff but are a little put off by the weird waxes, hydrogenated whatevers, and unpronounceable additives in what should be a pretty straightforward gastronomic transaction. So we decided to make them ourselves. As it turns out: it’s absurdly easy.

Dipping a cone is as straight forward as it sounds: press a scoop of vanilla (or Strawberry-Buttermilk! or Key Lime Fro-yo!) ice cream into your favorite cone, dip into chocolate, magically made liquid at room temperature by the addition of coconut oil, and roll around in some sprinkles.

Chocolate-Coconut Dip

  • ¼ Cup Unrefined Coconut Oil
  • 2/4 cup Semi-Sweet Chocolate– the shorter the ingredient list, the better the chocolate. Scharffenberger is great, but, like, so’s Ghirardelli.

Finely chop the Chocolate or, hey, use some Chocolate Chips.

In a small saucepan, warm the Coconut Oil until it melts completely over medium-low heat. Add the Chocolate and stir until it’s just melted. Turn off the heat and let it settle down to room temp, and dip away.

This stuff stays liquid indefinitely even in a pretty chilly room, but you probably want to store it long term in the fridge (if it lasts that long). Give it a gentle zap in the microwave or re-heat on the stove to get things back to dippable.

If you’re not super into Coconut, using a lighter tasting refined Coconut Oil will work just as well– and would be even harder to taste in a darker Chocolate.

SPRANKLES

  • 3 cups Powdered Sugar
  • 1 Egg White (from a box or, you know, a fucking egg)
  • Coloring - we use about ¼ tsp of fancy powder pigments. You can use whatever you want– Beet and Blueberry Juice for the hippies,  Red Dye fucking 40 for everyone else. If you use more than 1 tsp liquid, please add an extra ¼ cup of Powdered Sugar!
  • Maybe up to 1 tbsp warm water. Maybe. But probably not.

You will also need:

  • A Piping Bag fitted with a #2 Round Piping Tip

or

  • A fucking Ziplock with the teeniest tip cut off of a corner. Voila.

Line your counters, or 4 baking sheets, with Parchment. Waxed Paper, Tin Foil, and even Silpats don’t cut it and will make your life hard, I promise.

Mix together the Powdered Sugar and Egg White until you get a stiff, but pipe-able, paste that feels a little like Peanut Butter. Add your color – if you’re working in batches, do it in different batches – and keep stirring until there are no streaks.

Fill your piping (Ziplock) bag and pipe the colorful stuff onto the parchment in thin, even stripes. You can get it super close, you can zig zag, whatever it takes to get it all emptied, just be sure that the lines of icing don’t touch.

Let dry until the piped lines are hard – which only takes about 20 minutes – and then break into small pieces with your hands or a knife.

These Sprinkles keep GREAT, but need to stay super dry. For that, we turn to our freezer. Keep them locked up tight in a bag or container, and frozen, so moisture can’t get in there and make ‘em lose their crunch.

*okay. maybe an Oreo McFlurry. but like. that’s a discussion not for here.

For asexuals, sex is like… a donut. When we see a donut, we do not have the urge to eat the donut. This does not necessarily mean we hate the donut, or think the donut is disgusting— many of us even like donuts. But we never have any urge to walk over there and eat it. Demisexuals will have the urge to eat the donut only if it their absolute favorite kind of donut in the whole world, and greysexuals sometimes will have the urge to get the donut, and sometimes not. Celibates are on diets.

Breakfast bowl of champions before it got all messy and mixed up 🙌😝 Plain greek yogurt mixed with stevia for some #greekgains topped with frozen raspberries, blackberries, pumpkin o’s from #traderjoes, sea salt caramel almond, and some spranklesss 😍💙💗💜 Ate wayyyy more toppings than what is shown here, but I just like a pretty breakfast 😆💛Time to be productive today!! I got lots to do before the weekend. So sore from #legsday yesterday but I’m gonna see what I can do at the gym 👊💪 Have a great Friday! #fitfood #fitchick #flexfood #fuelyourbody #flexibledieting #iifym #iifymgirls #eatforabs #superfoods #flexbowl #flexbowlfridays #sprankles #cheatclean #cleantreat #leanbody #leangains #balancedintake #healthyoptions #healthyfoodporn #healthybreakfast #prettyproyo

Breakfast noms before I hit the road!! 7 hour drive back to the hometown and sunny sunshine state of FLO-RIDA💛🌻🌞🏡🚙 Whipped up some #fluffcake aka #sexfood aka #sweetomelette also known as #proteincrepe 😍❤️👍 Topped with #chobani pumpkin seasonal greek yogurt, #traderjoes spiced pumpkin seeds, frozen razz and blackberries. Total #basicbitch status (24/7) but I’m okay with it😋😝😂😉 Have a GREAT FRIDAY ❤️ #flexfood #foodporn #fitchicks #fitfoodie #flexibledieting #iifym #iifymgirls #eatforabs #healthybreakfastporn #healthyfoodporn #gains #leangains #Balance #balancedintake #girlsthatbake #girlsthatworkout #sprankles #gymfood