spoilers: the hobbit

vimeo

(( OOC: Finally threw this crack together. *slides it across the table in a brown paper bag* )) 

@ohtheclevernessofme1972

Family

The Hobbit x Reader

“And who do you think you are? A woman, traveling in the company of dwarves? It’s preposterous!”

You hold back the urge to roll your eyes. This unibrow-man has really been getting on your nerves. Now even more so because he’s singled you out because you’re a woman. Not the first time this has happened.

Snow begins to fall gently around you, and you hold your chin high. “No reason that concerns you.” The man scowls, and you go back to stand next to your company. But you’re stopped by someone grabbing your wrist, and you’re pulled back into his leering stare.

“You will tell me, or I will force you to.” He scowls down at you, and you wrinkle your nose at the sour smell of his breath and his yellowing teeth that are too close to your face for your liking.

Thorin rushes forward and shoves him. Hard.

“You will not lay another hand on her,” he hisses.

“Or you’ll have to answer to us, brow-man!” Bofur adds, straightening up to make himself look taller. All it does, though, is puff out his chest ridiculously. You crack a small smile at his efforts.

Fili and Kili step in front of you next, and you would never mess with the deadly stares they’re sending towards the man. He slinks backwards slowly, obviously intimidated by anyone who shows even the slightest bit of authority over him. Balin takes your hand and pulls you beside him and Dwalin, who is staring down some of the people of Laketown around you.

You smile to yourself. You know that the rest of the Company knows that you can handle yourself, but they still came to your aid. You squeeze Balin’s hand a little bit tighter as you join ranks with your friends, now family. To think you almost didn’t join this quest. Who knows where you would be without your brother.

Cats Day 14

Summary: You and your son, Frerin II, accidentally turn Thorin, Kili, Fili, Dwalin, Balin and Gandalf into cats and this is the result (Spin off of The Elf and The Dwarf)

Chapter Summary: You get a very unexpected, but expected letter from Dain.

Master List - Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9 - Part 10 - Part 11 - Part 12 - Part 13


“Meow.”

You ignore it as you make your way down the hall. You still were not happy with Thorin.

Keep reading

2

bagginshield???? my city now

Middle-Earth MBTI

Bilbo Baggins of The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings has been officially retyped! And it fits him so well! I am so happy with it.

Originally posted by asstrxlxgy

Also, you will see the post has been edited to be 100% better and some characters were deleted. One, because they are already on The Lord of the Rings post. Second, or they were so minor I really couldn’t type them officially.

THE HOBBIT MBTI LINK

Galadriel has also been retyped. There was a part of me that saw INTP, but it didn’t work because she is so dominant Ni. Enjoy.

THE LORD OF THE RINGS MBTI LINK

Hairless Feet! Frodo was just hanging out with his uncle’s friend when he decided to dangle his feet in the water to cool off. (You won’t catch him going in more than that! He’s a bit scared of water.) Dwalin joins him, anticipating his surprise when Frodo sees his bare feet… He remembers Bilbo’s reaction!

Frodo is wondering if Dwalin hasn’t got hair on his feet for the same reason he hasn’t got hair on his head!

I’m trying to up my game by doing more than just single characters! I seriously need to watch more Bob Ross on Netflix for landscapes/backgrounds. XD 

I’m so disappointed when elves in fiction are merely immortal humans with pointy ears, and dwarves are just short humans with beards. Perhaps others enjoy it, but I am bored of banal human conflicts and vices projected ad nauseam onto supposedly inhuman races. 

I want to see things that really make me believe elves and dwarves and other fantasy races aren’t just disguised humans. Show me strange biology, incomprehensible minds, impossible virtues and unthinkable sins, oddities and curiosities of all kinds. 

I think that’s what drew me to Tolkien’s races, who have exactly those kinds of quirks that set them apart from ordinary humans - like dwarves having only 1/3 of their race female, or elves being capable of telepathy. I love fic that explores the consequences of these strange characteristics most of all.