So how about I talk about this wonderful scene in 6x12.
Killian acts so light-hearted, he laughs and tries to flirt with Emma, but it’s way too obvious and even without her superpower, Emma would realize something’s going on. She knows he’s hiding something but she can’t know exactly what, that he feels guilty for letting her father practically steal from her only to satisfy his need for revenge.
So he tries to flirt until Emma confronts him.
She’s still smiling, however. With that, Killian’s resolve breaks, and even the music shows that. Up to that point, the music is casual, almost comical even, but then it does an abrupt change when Killian mentions Archie, pause for a few seconds, and then a soft CS theme.
Killian: The truth is, I’m a bit out of sorts…
He doesn’t want to lie to her. He sounds like he’s trying to come up with something to cover it up, and luckily for him, he does have something.
Killian: … because of Archie.
Yeah, I paid the Cricket a visit because I needed to talk to him about… about you.
Technically, this isn’t a lie. Killian wanting David’s blessing, in the end, had to do with him wanting to be a part of Emma’s family, which includes David.
And that surpirses Emma. She didn’t expect that.
Killian: I thought you were gonna die. And that does something to a man. It changes the way he thinks about things… about us.
Now, if you have the video available (thanks, YouTube!) I’d like you to pay attention to how he speaks. His voice is low, soft, nervous and even breathy. It sounds like he’s forcing those words out of his mouth, as if he wants to keep his feelings safe inside the way he used to do for so long, and it’s so hard to let them out and it shows in how he acts.
Remember that he didn’t talk about that to Archie. But I know as much as the next shipper that this confession was anything but a lie or a cover. We know how much he loves her and how even the thought of her death terrified him. And it was just amazing, wonderful, absolutely fantastic that he confessed that to her, and look how hard it is for him! Killian Jones, the guy with all the bravado in the world, the one who knows the exact right words to say to someone to either scare them or comfort them, the guy who does the talk in his relationship while Emma does the doing, he can’t confess his fears to save his life. Remember how he was almost blushing and talking in big phrases when he first indirectly told her he loves her? It’s the same here, only this time he was telling her about a terribly negative feeling he had. And it’s so desperately hard for him to do that, he can barely voice his thoughts or keep his voice straight.
And when he says “about us” Emma grows even more worried. She doesn’t know how exactly her near-death experience affected his thoughts…
And really, it shouldn’t be her worry, she was the one who almost died, and that’s another reason why Killian was having such a hard time telling her that. Look how he’s trying to smile here, covering up his insecurities on that. As soon as Killian lets her know that things didn’t change in a bad way…
Killian: And he reminded me how important it was to share my feelings.
She smiles. Look at her cheekbones going up as Killian continues to be nervous as all hell.
And he breaks eye contact to look back where David just left from. No excuse to look there besides his nervousness on the vulnerability he just exposed himself.
Killian: And I didn’t want to let you in the shed without sharing them, so… feelings shared.
Emma: Well, I like feelings once in a while.
And this is absolutely wonderful. Such a short scene that barely contributed to the plot, but it was usually Killian who helped Emma get comfortable to share her feelings, the opposite is rare. And while I understand why that is, I also really cherish the fact that we got that scene. Where Killian, being absolutely nervous as if the end of the world was coming for him, confessed his fears and worries and Emma told him she appreciated it and kissed him. And it was just amazing and wonderful and everything good and pure in the world.