Can you imagine how drastically ga could've been changed during that ax murder house when zak was laying down had the ax next to his head and was demanding the spirit to make it fall like wtf does he think sometimes, one day soon he's going seriously get hurt from provoking and than where's he going be with his new nose chopped off
LOL yeah… sometimes he’ll ‘command’ a spirit to push him down the stairs or hurt him and… idk he must know that nothing will happen. Zak is way to self-centered to actually put himself in harm. all though, he did pick up a random snake. and jump over a puddle w a live wire in it. and lay under an elevator while it was descending. hm… maybe he just wants to die
You call Steve "punk". Have you ever slipped punk clothing into his closet? Does he wear it?
well, he absolutely refuses to wear combat boots. which i find personally offensive, because i wear steeltoe combats almost every day. but steve insists that having tromped across most of europe in steeltoes and only being saved from trenchfoot thanks to the miracle of old-timey science, he will no longer wear combat boots unless theyre the custom ones that go with his cap costume. sorry. uniform. and that since sneakers exist in the future and are, and i quote ‘like walking around with old mrs mckinneys angel cake for shoes, buck, its great’ he will not be wearing boots if he doesnt have to.
the day we talked him into skinny jeans was pretty great. have you ever seen a dog doing that high-step when you put shoes on them?? he looked like that for the first half hour or so. and then he tried to ‘jog’ up the tower lobby steps, and split his pants open at the crotch.
it was a good day for the ladies (and some of the gents. you know. the ones who didnt immediately grow inferiority complexes) in the lobby of stark tower.
it was not a good day for steve rogers.
putting steve in any kind of plaid just makes him look like a lumberjack, not a punk. so that doesnt work.
steve cant wear black without looking like a vampire, hes so pale. but one time he borrowed my dont-touch-me black leather motorcycle jacket and managed to make that look badass for a little while. and then he let a little girl in central park facepaint a sunflower on his left cheek, which pretty much spoiled and sort of badass look he might have been managing. which wasnt much, because he was still wearing khakis.
Voltron Ghost Adventures AU where all five of them are just a mess of clunky camera gear and nerves and they constantly have the weirdest experiences as they stumble into haunted houses just hoping for the best
“Pidge, you brought the night vision goggles right???” “No, you said grab provisions. I got some Skittles and a Twinkie. Why, do you want the Twinkie?” “Pidge, you had one job.”
For some reason, spirits in almost every single house grab Lance’s ass and no one can figure out why
“Jesus, Hunk, take me to dinner first” “Lance, I’m across the hall” “Ohhhh my gooooood GUUUYS A SPIRIT JUST GRABBED MY ASS”
Shiro always gets things thrown at him. like, every single time. It’s where he’s gotten most of his scars because they’ll be walking into a kitchen and a chair will come skrrrrting around the corner and fly at his face
“But why is it always me?” “Probably because you’re so offensively good-looking”
If there’s a scary doll in the house, it will find Keith. It always does.
*somewhere, Keith shrieks* “haha guess you could call Keith a chick magnet” “Lance, I hope a spirit pushes you down the stairs just because you said that stupid pun” “Y’know, Pidge, you’re always so sweet to me”
Hunk screams at any movement or creak in the house, every single time
Pidge gets into the habit of talking with the spirits like they’re her best friends and ignores imminent danger because she just explains it as them having a nice conversation
“Hunk, put me down, I’m fine, Charlene just wants to point me to where her body is” “PIDGE, THERE IS A KNIFE FLYING TOWARDS YOUR FACE I DON’T THINK SHE CARES IF YOU FIND HER BODY”
Most of the time, they just end up recording them creeping around abandoned shacks really carefully
Hunk always uses too much zoom so when he and Lance are exploring the west side of a mansion and Lance turns around and whispers “did you hear that”, all that Hunk sees on his night vision camera is Lance’s huge glowy eyes and his gigantic nostrils
At least once a week, they get locked in the basement of wherever they’re exploring and it always becomes a situation of life or death for them to escape yet they forget to plan for how to prevent it for the next time
Aries: your tears are so hot and your cheeks are flushed, you hide your face in your hands and you cry to all ends. I know you miss them, they made you feel like your heart was beating in your chest. But you were alive long before you knew you were, just as you were loved long before you believe you are.
Taurus: You made a rose garden with them. You each had your own, but yours were real and theirs was plastic. They kept tending them but it missed your loving touch, how could they screw you over? Love I don’t know. The universe isn’t fair; how can it be so cruel to something so precious?
Gemini: You used to talk to me, about politics and poetry. You used to tell me stories, about magic and all things pretty. You always told the story of you and them, you said it was the most beautiful one. The pen could never describe your pain, we’re in vain. Their lack of empathy to blame, you’re killing your brain. Your thoughts are violent and I know you can’t hide it.
Cancer: They said they were scared of you leaving, little did they know about how you wrote poems about their touch. How you stayed up just to talk to them, and complimented them everyday to make them feel like the world. Now you’re just another stripe on their wall, a number. It’s ironic, really. They take all your pieces one by one and then ask you why you’re empty.
Leo: They took your hand and walked with you through nights of blanched white stars and dark blue skies, you never liked boating until they took you on a cruise but they drowned you with the anchor of the ship. Now you’re a castaway on an island, you’re so isolated. What happened to your people spirit, did it go down with the anchor?
Virgo: You trusted them, you never believed in fairytales but goddamnit they were your Prince Charming. I’m so sorry they lied to you, happy endings were a religion to you but they didn’t believe in your God. I’m sorry that tears are your only remedy and everything hurts. I’m sorry that the midnight air burns on the places they’ve touched and that you don’t want to wake up in the morning anymore.
Libra: They were your favorite song, the one you kept on repeat when you were a teen. They were your high school sweetheart, they made you feel alive. They kissed your eyelids and looked at you with adoration, their back pocket held knifes you’d never seen. The silhouette you see in the dark frightens you. And you said “I don’t think people understand brokenness until they experience it, you keep getting stabbed with the broken pieces they made and it’s like a slap of nostalgia.”
Scorpio: You flinched from my touch, hid away in the dark. Little water sign with a shattered heart and atrocious eyes; I’m sorry that your trust has been crumpled like your thousands of papers in the wind. You told me you’d never love or trust anyone again.
Sagittarius: You ran to the edge the world and drowned in seas of sadness, you went over heartbreak hills and lied in beaches with suns burning your face, when you came back you were even more empty than when you left. Your eyes look so much more dull.
Capricorn: There was something enchanting about the way their eyes made your light up and their touch made you smile so broadly, now that they’re gone you’ve gone in a zone of workaholic mode. Anything to keep you busy. Anything to keep you from thinking of them.
Aquarius: You threw away your independence for them, took care of them when they were sick and tangled your hands in their bushy hair. They were your everything, your own world map with compass saying “Go find yourself.”
Where are you? You’ve lost yourself.
Pisces: The smoke from weed lingers in your home, your bed hasn’t been made in two weeks. Vodka bottles lie on the floor. You haven’t washed your hair in all of these weeks, you didn’t leave your bad. You listen to their favorite band, I told you to get outside and you said that the only oxygen you had left, abandoned your lungs. They were oxygen, they were toxic.
as an ethnic person I have way too much damn pride like I refuse to admit anything is spicy like the holy spirit could come down from heaven with a hedge of fire to put around my head bc what I ate was too hot n id still be like “na:)h fam…. im good…” if they offered me jesus tears to drink
Imirrim-Chæma-Thiridion had answered a distress call. It had probably been stupid on xir part, but what was done was done.
A small ship, even smaller than xir, had crashed on a barren but breathable-to-most-species moon in the system of Hyaldnar. Xe had been making a delivery for xir mentor when xir communication system picked it up, and since xe was barely past adolescence, the journey of not even five rotations was making xem bored and seeing a crash site would be exciting. After all, it was probably an automated distress call, nothing could survive a crash to a rocky moon.
But there xe was, standing in front of a crumpled and burned wreck and the very much alive creature that had crawled out of it after perceiving xir pod landing. Imirrim cursed xir rotten luck, now xe would have to help the poor thing. Xe had been planning on just sight-seeing the wreck a bit, maybe later contact whatever species it had belonged to to tell it had crashed, if only to look good in front of xir mentor.
After a while of the creature gawking and baring it’s teeth at Imirrim, xe recognized the species as human, the fifth longest living space-faring species. Still, xe belonged to the second longest living, and Thalmors like xemself could outlive five humans each born at the moment of the previous one’s death. What had especially stuck from xir exobiology and alien anthropology lessons was humans’ way of expressing their emotions in strange and backwards ways, and their sheer capability to holding grudges. Great.
Imirrim approached the human slowly. It was approaching xem right back, still showing it’s teeth like it was attacking, but but humans expressed their emotions backwards, so that was good, right? Besides, the human was wounded and limping, and xe could outrun it if things went bad.
“Finally someone answered my call,” the human -a male, xe guessed- said as Imirrim was close enough. “I’ve been here for a week and I’m running out of water.”
A week? How was he alive?
“Oh, where are my manners,” the human said and extended the less damaged of its upper limbs towards Imirrim. “I’m Thomas Warren, from the human colony on Clyzma Al Carrim, farmer by profession.”
Imirrim carefully extended a cheliped to mimic the greeting, and did xir best not to flinch when the human grabbed it and shook it. “I am Imirrim-Chæma-Thiridion from planet Skismin, apprentice to the Grand Navigator.”
“It is very nice to meet you,” Thomas said and shook xir cheliped some more before finally letting go. “You mind taking me off this rock?”
Imirrim shifted xir weight from a foot to another to a third. “Sure.”
“Great!” Thomas said and pulled his lips even further back, revealing even more teeth, more than could possibly fit comfortably into a mouth that small. “I’ll be right back.” He limped back into the small shipwreck.
Imirrim was regretting this. It wasn’t customary to help strangers, especially from other species, since there was no telling what they could do. Humans had a reputation of being unpredictable, especially when wounded. And this ‘Thomas’ was covered in wounds, some looking much too severe for anyone to possibly survive.
Thomas emerged from his wreckage, carrying something that was clearly important if he was willing to retrieve it from a wreck while severely wounded. “So, Imirrim, was it? Where are you headed?”
Imirrim led the human to xir pod and helped him climb over the threshold. “Back to Skismin. You can get better help there.” If he stayed alive that long.
“Lovely, you’re a real life saver,” Thomas chuckled. “I’ll owe you one.”
To Imirrim’s surprise -and relief- Thomas did not die during the two rotations’ travel back to Skismin. He talked xir auditory membrane off and after a while filled the pod with the faint stench of alien blood, but all things considered he wasn’t the worst passenger. Once xe had docked the pod back on Skismin and had helped Thomas and his bag of belongings (which turned out to be an assortment of small possibly decorative items, data storage devices, clothes, and even a few ordinary rocks one could get anywhere but that were apparently ‘cool’) to the nearest emergency clinic, Thomas turned to xem one last time.
“If you ever find yourself in a bad spot, call me,” he said with a serious expression xe had come to recognize during their time at the small pod. “I owe you my life, just call and I’ll pay you back.”
Imirrim stared after him for a long while before turning away and heading to tell the Grand Navigator that hir delivery was received and thanked for, and to tell xir mentor about human Thomas Warren.
After xe had told hir what had passed, Imirrim asked one last question. “Master, what does it mean when a human says they 'owe their life’ to someone?”
The Grand Navigator’s age-reddened crest rose curiously. “Like you probably know, humans are known for holding grudges and for being almost insensibly loyal. While they keep in mind all wrong that has been done to them, they do not forget a good deed done to them either. 'Owing one’s life’ means you have done something to them that they regard highly of, usually the saving of a life, and that they will do anything in their power to, as they say, 'return the favor’. Did this Thomas say this to you?”
Imirrim nodded. “Right before he went with the medical staff, he said he owes me his life, and all I need to do in a time of distress is to call him and he will come.”
The Grand Navigator raised hir upper chelipeds in a sign of pride. “You have done well, my apprentice. To earn a human’s favor is a feat of great bravery and compassion. One day, you shall become a fine and daring Navigator, like the explorers before us.”
Imirrim ruffled his crest at the praise. Maybe answering the distress call wasn’t such a bad idea after all.
Time went by, and Imirrim progressed from an appearance to a novice and on, up the ranks, and eventually landed a spot as the head Navigator on the long trade ship Pochella, traveling at high speeds through barely charted nebulas and dangerous asteroid fields. Xe plotted courses through the densest of rock fogs and past dangerous gravitational pulls, and not once did his calculations for the course fail.
Xe had lived many more cycles, many more than a human could ever live. Imirrim had counted- xe had kept a distant eye on Thomas Warren in case xe would ever have a need for the favor he had claimed to owe xem, but the need never came. He had died fifty-seven cycles after xe had rescued him, or seventy-two years, as humans counted time, and even more time had passed after that.
Still, even after all this time xe looked back at him for courage when daily life was hard and xir spirit was down. Xe had met and worked with humans many times now and they all shared the same spirit Thomas Warren had had, but none of them had left quite the same impression on xem as Thomas, who had smiled and joked through nine rotations on broken bones and told fondly of his family and farm back on Clyzma Al Carrim.
Imirrim had plotted a course through a particularly dense asteroid cloud, a course that would save the ship a lot of time and fuel. The ship was nearly out of the cloud when the proximity alarm went off and something clamped into the ship’s hull. The computer showed xir an approximate hologram of the something. It was a smaller and armed ship attaching itself to their ship.
The Cieruna members of the crew -small, short-lived, and feathery things with nimble hands and a sensitivity to electromagnetic fields- were screaming in terror. Pirates, they yelled, we can’t shake them off, we’re all going to die. Shush, xe said, we will not die. I’ll call for help, be quiet.
Imirrim galloped to the unoccupied communication post and sent a distress message on all frequencies. “This is Imirrim-Chæma-Thiridion, head navigator of the trade ship Pochella. We are inside the Halfway asteroid cloud. And we are under attack by pirates. Please help us.” Once the message was sent xe stepped away from the console and joined the crew in listening to the magnetic creaking of their hull in the morbid silence that had followed xir call.
The ship could not move, following the already plotted course with the extra weight and bulk of the pirate ship attached to them would be suicide, and finding a new safe route out without knowing the exact dimensions of the other ship was impossible, not to mention useless against the threat. All xe could do was hope for a miracle.
And a miracle xe got. Another proximity alarm sounded, and the computer showed an image of a charging mining pod, ten times smaller than the pirate ship and at least a hundred times smaller than Pochella. Outmatched, outgunned, it rammed the pirate ship and despite being hit by their lasers and missiles, it kept on pounding it with its grappling arms and mining lasers and asteroid bombs, everything it had. And finally, when the pod was leaking air and plasma and fuel into space, the pirate ship released its hold and retreated, engines sputtering and its hull dented and battered, and flew away from Pochella and the mad mining pod to safety of the asteroids.
“What was that? What happened? The Cieruna chirred and cheeped. “It is gone! We are saved!”
Imirrim was still looking at the hologram screen. The mining pod was all but destroyed in the short but fierce fight. Someone exited it, wearing a spacesuit and carrying something, and the pod engaged it’s barely functional engines and sped away leaving a trail of debris and smoke in its wake, until it finally exploded from the damage it had sustained a safe distance away.
Imirrim stared at the hologram for a moment, and shifted xir weight from a foot to another to a third. Xe input a code to the control panel and opened a small airlock near the creature that had saved them all. Xe set off from the bridge where xe was posted and galloped through corridors and climbed down stairs, until xe arrived in front of the airlock that had already closed and the creature that had successfully boarded the ship.
“Are you Imirrim-Chæma-Thiridion?” The creature asked. Xe nodded, all the while looking the spacesuited being up and down. Four limbs, two for walking and two for holding. No tail, short neck but a neck nonetheless. No added room for fins or spikes or crests. It was a human.
The human handed their possession to xem -a lumpy bag that both felt and looked like it had rocks in it- and pulled off their helmet.
The human was ruffled and grizzled and had spark burns on his face and his eyes were serious, but he was baring his teeth in a joyous smile. He extended a hand to greet xem and Imirrim took hold of it and shook it.
“I am Stepa Warren,” the human introduced himself. “You rescued my grandfather from a shipwreck when he was young. He spoke fondly of you til his dying day. It is an honor to meet you.”
I started laying D&D a little while ago and during my second session our party: 2 warriors, 1 bard, 1 sorcerer, 1 rogue and a barbarian agree to take this cursed coffin that held a Lich spirit inside down into an ancient crypt. Turns out there was a large labyrinth beneath the graveyard and the walls were made of doppelgängers. One of the warriors gets taken and is pulled up to the ceiling and is surrounded by doppelgängers that take on her appearance.
Rogue: I want to climb up and get her down from the ceiling.
DM: Role for perception and athletics.
(Roles an 18 and a 23)
DM: Okay, you easily scale the wall of doppelgängers and successfully grab the real one. Now both of you are stuck to the ceiling.
Female Warrior: I want to try to break free.
DM: Strength check.
DM: You successfully break free from their grasp and the two of you are now falling.
Male warrior (Me): I would like to try to catch them.
DM: role a strength and athletics for each of them.
(For the rogue I roll a 16 and a 17.)
DM: Okay you manage to grab the rogue’s cloak and pull him up on the wall of the labyrinth. Take two damage. What about the warrior?
Me: 14 and a natural 1!
DM: (Face palms and lets out a groan) You successfully grab the warrior as she’s falling but the weight of her heavy plated armor is too much for you and rips your arm from it’s socket.
DM: However the rogue that just lit a torch cauterizes it.
Shenanigans continue on until the party meets up again. Rogue and sorcerer are trying to lift the heavy stone coffin that has the lich’s soul.
Sorcerer: Can someone give me a hand with this?
Me: I throw my arm at him and say: “Just be sure to give it back when you’re done with it.”
(DM Stares at me)
We continue through the crypt as we avoid several traps and ambushes by the undead.
Rogue: Is the reward even worth it?
Female warrior: This quest is gonna cost us an arm and a leg.
I cried so many times during this movie you wouldnt believe. Here is an unorganized list of why this movie was beautiful to me in every way.
1. Auli'i is my friend. I love her to death and hearing her speak and sing in this movie was not only surreal but incredibly emotional for me. Think of it as a proud mother but x10.
2. They brought up our lost art of wayfinding. Wayfinding is a genuinely lost art that has only recent begun again thanks to the Hokule'a. This is so important, and to see that Moana was so excited and shocked to find out her people were voyagers was truly amazing because I feel the exact same way. “Why did we stop?”
3. Maui. Maui is a myth that I grew up hearing about in betime stories. Everything that they talked about I had already known, and to see someone who you grew up learning about come to life in such a beautiful way was truly amazing. Not to mention I had completely forgotten that Maui didnt come from a God and a Mortal, he was given his power from the gods, but was born of mortal parents. I had forgoten my own mo'olelo.
4. Gramma Tala. Tala was the only one to support Moana’s call to the ocean. Many Polynesians feel this call to the ocean. It surrounds us, and it brings life. If theres a feeling I can relate to most its my need to be on the water, which is why I paddle. Also, theway they showed Tala’s aumakua (spirit animal) sent chills down my spine it was beautiful.
5. Te Fiti. In Hawaiian Te Fiti is Papa, mother earth. Watching Papa come to life after Te Ka was silenced made me cry. Papa gave me my islands, gave me my culture, and gave me my people. I love her. Also watching her lay back town to form her island was amazing because that’s also a big part of many mo'olelo- that gods and godesses lay down to form mountains and islands, and are in an eternal slumber beneath us.
6. The music. The music was beautiful. And having songs fully or partially written in Samoan(?) was amazing to listen to. To have disney publish a movie with a soundtrack with untranslated Polynesian in it was amazing of them.
7. The animation of hula. There wasn’t much of it, but the hula was beautiful and again made me so fucking happy when I saw it.
Not rly a reason but heres a nice tip: Moana doesn’t simply mean ocean, we could use Kai for that. Kai is the part of the ocean you can see. Moana is the deep sea. The sea that we voyage on.
There’s really a lot lot more but this is all I got for now yw here u go~