spiral sorting

I Got You On My Mind (Part 7)

Jungkook Soulmate AU (Angst)

[Part One] Previous Part | Part Seven | Epilogue

Summary: Jungkook reveals why he rejected you. But is it enough for you to forgive him?

Word count: 1.7k words

Originally posted by jungxook

You watched, mesmerized, as Jungkook fidgeted with his hands, the chords of muscles in his forearms flexing. His gaze was downcast, his plump lower lip caught between his teeth, as he struggled to find the words to stay. You found that this uncharacteristic nervousness made him seem more genuine, but still, it was difficult for you to trust Jungkook after everything that had transpired.

After recently regaining some of your memories, the wounds Jungkook had inflicted still felt fresh. Your heart ached as if it were only moments ago that Jungkook had tossed you aside.

The conflicting memories of Jungkook warred in your mind. On one hand, Jungkook had rejected you with cutting words and a cold heart. But on the other, he had helped nurse you back to health and remained resolutely by your side. Which one was the real Jungkook? 

You wanted desperately to hold onto the version of Jungkook you had imagined as a young girl, not the one who had been sleeping with your best friend.

“She won’t believe me,” Jungkook thoughts interrupted. Your gaze flickered to his, but he was still staring at the ground, unaware that he was projecting his thoughts. You could feel his uncertainty and fear through your soulmate bond. The sudden urge to comfort him arose, but you pushed it down.

“Jungkook, I promise I’ll listen,” you said quietly. His head shot up, Jungkook’s wide eyes peering into yours. He opened his mouth, but no words came out. “I can’t promise that I’ll believe you, or that everything will be fixed, but I’ll give you this chance to explain everything.”

Jungkook sighed and looked away, his jaw clenching.

“I know I need to explain this to you,” Jungkook began slowly. “But this is really hard for me. I don’t want to show this side of myself to you.”

“Believe it or not, I don’t hate you now and I probably never will,” you said with a small laugh. “We’re soulmates for a reason, you know.”

Jungkook gave you a small smile, his gaze flickering down. “I guess I’ll start from the beginning then.”

You nodded, waiting patiently as Jungkook took an unsteady breath. He closed his eyes for a moment, before exhaling slowly and looking back at you. His eyes were raw and honest.

“The first time I heard your thoughts, I was six,” Jungkook recalled with a fond smile. “You didn’t hear me for awhile later. I still remember what you thought. ‘That looks like a fun tree to climb.’”

“That was the first thing you heard?” you asked incredulously. “I remember that! I climbed a tall-ass tree in the park, and I fell and broke my arm.”

“I know,” Jungkook replied grimly. “I felt it, too. For such an underdeveloped bond, it didn’t make sense for me to be able to feel your emotions. But I could. All I could feel was your panic and pain.”

You winced, recalling the memory from all those years ago. For a six-year-old, it was a terrifying experience.

“I was so young at the time,” Jungkook continued. “I didn’t understand why I could feel emotions that weren’t mine. I didn’t know why I could hear someone else’s thoughts. And I couldn’t understand why I cared so much about a person I’d never met.”

You opened your mouth, but Jungkook cut you off immediately. “Don’t apologize,” Jungkook said, smiling slightly. “I got over it, eventually. It got easier when you started to hear me.”

“That wasn’t until, like, a year later,” you frowned. “That must’ve been so strange.”

“It felt a little intrusive,” Jungkook shrugged. “But your thoughts were pretty entertaining. Plus, I was a really shy kid, so you were my only friend for a little while.”

“That’s really sad,” you said quietly, your voice lilting. “We didn’t have an actual conversation until we were nine.”

“We could have had spoken sooner, but I didn’t want to,” Jungkook confessed, looking away. “I learned how to block my thoughts, mostly. Sometimes I can’t, if I get too emotional.”

“Why didn’t you want to talk to me?” you questioned, a little hurt.

“It wasn’t you,” Jungkook replied immediately. Then, he frowned and clenched his fists. He didn’t speak for several moments, but when he did, his voice was quiet. “It was because of my parents. They were soulmates, but for some reason, they didn’t get along.

“My mom found out that my dad was cheating on her, and it was a mess. They divorced a few months later. My mom got custody, and my dad sort of spiralled,” Jungkook explained, his voice coloured with shame. “I didn’t know how to face my own soulmate after that. I didn’t even know if I could believe in soulmates anymore.”

“Jungkook, I’m so sorry,” you whispered. “If I had known, I would’ve–”

“No, I didn’t want you to know,” Jungkook interrupted. “You were the only person I could pretend to be fine with. You were the only person who didn’t know how fucked up my family–how fucked up I was.”

“You were just a child,” you argued. “How could I think badly of you?”

Jungkook just shook his head. “I wanted to seem like a good person in front of you,” he said. “Even after my parents, I still wanted to believe in soulmates. I wanted to have something to look forward to. You were always so happy, it was easy to pretend with you.”

A few moments of silence passed as Jungkook tried to collect his thoughts. You wanted to reach out, to hold him, but you didn’t know if he would appreciate that.

“My mom had to work a lot to support me and my brother, so she wasn’t home often,” Jungkook continued, his voice low. “My dad picked up drinking. He tried to take us home with him, once. The police had to come.

“My brother was hit pretty hard, since he was older when it happened. I was in middle school when he started high school. He joined a gang, started getting into fights and dealing.

“I didn’t follow him, but I got involved with some pretty bad people. You know what my reputation’s like–it’s because that’s who I am. From high school till now, all I did was party. I drank, I did drugs, I slept around.”

“Why didn’t I know any of this?” you asked, confused. “In all the years we’ve been talking, I couldn’t tell that a single thing was off.”

“I showed you what I wanted you to see,” Jungkook replied with a cold laugh. “I was hoping by the time I met you, I would’ve already cleaned up my act. I didn’t expect to see you that night, and I was so ashamed of myself. And I ended up pushing you away, because I wasn’t ready for you to see me like that.

“You were the last person I wanted to hurt, but I fucked it up anyway,” Jungkook said, his words venomous. “I ruined everything before it even began. It’s fucked up, but after you lost you’re memories, I thought it was like a second chance. I know, it’s fucking disgusting, but I wanted you to see the person I could become.”

“Jungkook…”

“Look, I know everything about me is fucked up, okay?” Jungkook spat. “I don’t want to hear apologies, I don’t need pity. I don’t need forgiveness, either. This is the truth. This is everything I never wanted you to know.”

“Jungkook!” you repeated, more firmly this time. You reached out and grabbed his hand, which was clammy, and gave it a gentle squeeze. “Listen to me. All I wanted was for you to be honest with me. It doesn’t matter if you’re embarrassed or ashamed of your past, of yourself. If I’m your soulmate, I want to love all of you.”

Jungkook stared at you, his mouth hanging open slightly.

“If anything, I wish I could have been there for you,” you continued sadly. You played with his large hand, weaving your own fingers in between his. “We’re soulmates, you know? We’re supposed to support each other. There’s a reason why we’re connected, even if we don’t understand.”

“I just hate disappointing you,” Jungkook sighed, squeezing your hand back. “I was afraid to see our relationship crumble. Just being soulmates–I don’t know if that’s enough. If I’m anything like my father–which I am–then we’re doomed.”

“Don’t say that,” you scolded him gently. “I’ll admit, there are some things about you that aren’t great. But you’re more than your mistakes. You’re passionate and kind, and you’ve shown me the best sides of you, too.

“We aren’t so two-dimensional, Jungkook. I’m sure I’m not the perfect person you made me out to be when we were younger,” you laughed.

“But you’re perfect for me,” Jungkook insisted, then blushed deeply. He gulped visibly and looked away.

“Look, I don’t know if I forgive you yet,” you said, and you saw Jungkook deflate. “But I will eventually. I want us to move past this together.”

“Thank you,” Jungkook whispered, his voice cracking. He looked up at you. “I know I don’t deserve that, or you. But you’re the reason why I even try. If it wasn’t for you, I’d have probably given up already.”

“You should want to live for yourself, Jungkook,” you smiled sadly. “I am your soulmate, but I’m not your entire world.”

You pulled Jungkook into your arms, and he immediately buried his nose in the crook of your neck. You weren’t sure, but you thought you could feel wetness against your skin. Was he crying?

“You helped me a lot these past few weeks,” you continued, holding Jungkook tightly in your arms. “Let me help you now. We’ll make it through this, together. Okay?”

Jungkook nodded against your neck. And despite how terribly everything began, you were almost certain that everything would turn out just fine. With Jungkook truly by your side now, you felt strong. You were determined to unravel the mystery of the boy in your arms, who felt as far away as he was close.

- Girl in Luv

One more part to go, then it’s finished! How did you guys feel about this chapter? Are you still mad at Jungkook? His behaviour sort of makes sense now…I hope. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed this series, and thanks to everyone who stuck with it! Look forward to the last instalment of I Got You On My Mind. I’m always so thankful for the support we receive, from the replies to the fanmail. You guys are the best! Happy reading 💛

The sheer amount of YOI content on my dash just won me over and I ended up binge-watching the whole thing. And then it put me in the mood for drawing, which I haven’t done in a really long time, so…have some sketchy, sneezy Victor :)

I am yet to find a fandom where discourse doesn’t exist. 

Opinions on shit no one asked me about

-I love it when one thing leads to another in fic and things just sort of spiral out of control. Like a character feels a little queasy so they skip breakfast, which later makes them dizzy and weak and honestly everyone would have been a lot less worried if they’d have just eaten and threw up
-guilt as a reason for not disclosing injuries. “This is all my fault so I can’t take time away from fixing the problem to ask for help.”
-uncharacteristic crabbiness from the comic relief character as the first sign that something’s off
-while I love when a character collapses from pushing themselves too far while sick or hurt, I don’t see enough of the MOMENT THAT A CHARACTER REALIZES that they can’t handle this alone anymore and asks for help literally right before/as they collapse
-characters who are uncharacteristically forgetful when they’re sick and end up really frustrated with themselves
-characters trying to be responsible when they’re sick and asking for a day off, but they don’t have a fever (yet…) and honestly you’re gonna have to fight through a cold, you’re an adult, grow a pair of ovaries and toughen up. But the fever comes later and they’re all of a sudden very very sick and on top of it feeling like they’re just blowing a tiny cold way out of proportion

Someone to Stay - AU

Chapter 1

Blue fire.

The condensation on her glass trickled unheeded while Claire could not take her eyes off him.

How had walked onstage and grabbed a guitar as well as everyone’s attention in a few seconds. To think she had never heard of him before, or the band; until her friend had dragged her to the Edinburgh bar. To help her forget, if she could, at least for two hours.

Claire appreciated Geillis’s intentions as she watched him croon into the mike. His long deft fingers strummed the guitar. His tousled red waves fell into his eyes and with a quick flick of his head, his gaze met hers for a second. And how her breath had hitched.

Oh no.

He didn’t miss a beat. Claire feigned nonchalance as well and pulled out her phone. She glanced briefly at him again while the device whirred. Information gleaned from the adverts plastered on every wall. James Fraser, The Clan, band members…

Lead singer of Scottish band The Clan, 28, born in Inverness to parents –

“Claire, you promised, come on!” Startled from her stalking, Claire turned to Geillis and plunked her phone face down. A long-forgotten familiar tingling had begun at the base of her spine. She drowned it once more in whiskey. Never again.

She brushed her hair back, sipping, savoring the oaken burn. Onstage, James Fraser sang of love unrequited.


 Hey lass, come with me

Say you love me

Say you’ll be mine

Hey lass…


The barest hint of a Scots lilt made Claire smile, the first in days. She had escaped to Edinburgh after surprising Frank doing ‘research’ with his young assistant. In bed. Had banged on Geillis’s door unannounced with her bag stocked from the Heathrow duty free. G pouring straight tequila down her throat as she sobbed. Four years of her life, wasted – and for what? For who?

The rain had not let up for the better part of a week. Claire’s mood remained just as stormy. She had almost regretted crashing at G’s, thinking Ibiza might have been nicer. Until now.

The song (“Hey Lass”, furtively Googled) ended to thunderous applause from the tightly packed crowd. James Fraser smiled, bowing slightly and waving a hand to acknowledge his band mates.

“We’d like to thank ye for coming out tonight,” James smiled softly, “and here’s one for the road.”

Pulsing drums met the twang of bass. It reverberated in Claire’s chest. The band launched into another song, the last of the evening. Claire missed the intro as she focused on the way James caressed the microphone.


 Watch and learn

Hand holds steady

Thought you’d won

But here’s the burn

I know ye, more’s the pity

I’m letting go…


Here was anger, flooding Claire as the song brought forth mental pictures better left hidden. The bed in shambles. The noises. Her gasp. Their surprise. Fuck them. More whiskey for her trouble.

Geillis elbowed Claire, winking at her obvious staring of Jamie Fraser. Claire rolled her eyes, leaning in to shout over the clamor of people singing along. “Knock it off! He’s cute, that’s all.”

“I’ll say!” Geillis winked again and hollered at the stage. Claire laughed and emptied her glass. What harm could it do, this insignificant attraction?

She couldn’t help watching him. His tall commanding presence drew the eyes in. Jamie stepped out of the spotlight as the bassist broke into a solo. Jamie grabbed a bottle of water as he glanced over the audience.

 Attraction, pure and simple. That’s all it was.

 But it could be bad.

This, whatever it was, could lead to a downward spiral of sorts. Didn’t she know it all too well? How four years could mean absolutely fuck-all to someone all too willing to throw it away at a moment’s notice? And she was sure it had been more than one moment. Fuck Frank.

Claire gestured Geillis she was headed for the loo. Pushing her way through the masses, she remembered why she avoided clubs and the like.

After a quick visit, she fought against the throng at the bar and was suddenly confronted by a large man dressed all in black. He spoke into a discreet hand radio.

“Excuse me,” Claire muttered as politely as she could. When she tried squeezing past him, he put his hand on her shoulder. Claire turned, aggravated, not willing to endure a stupid pick-up line or scheme.

“The band would like to ask you backstage.” The man gestured to a curtained-off area beside the bar.

“Uh, sorry. The band?” A certain red-headed giant perhaps… No.

“Yeah. Come on.” He turned brusquely and expected Claire to automatically follow. Nothing riled her more.

“I’m with someone, actually, so-“

“Oh, they can join you,” he said dismissively.

“Well, I don’t know. Let me ask her.”

Claire weaved her way among the sea of tables and tapped her friend’s arm.

“Hey babe, almost gave you up for lost! I ordered us another round!” She tipped her glass in Claire’s direction and swallowed deep.

“G, there’s this guy who’s asking us backstage. Band wants to hang out with us.” Claire shrugged noncommittally.

“Hang out? Seriously?” Geillis snorted. “There’s a euphemism if I’ve ever heard one.”

“You mean-“

“Darling, there’s only one thing hanging out could mean. A rock band backstage? At this hour? Pffft. Now, if you want to go, get your rebound in, I’m happy to go with. Your call.” Geillis downed the rest of her whiskey tumbler.

“Oh. Well.” Claire felt disappointed. God knew why. Was it all men? She’d never even heard of the band, or Jamie Fraser, until tonight. She wasn’t quite ready to become a groupie or stick it to Frank with a one-night stand just yet.

 She caught the crew member’s eye, who waited with mild impatience on the edge of the crowd. She smiled apologetically. She shook her head, mouthing, “No thanks.”

 Such a shame, really.

So, the other day I had Harry Potter 7 on in the background while I was doodling and it got me to thinking about how much I don’t like Ron and Hermione as a couple. Back in the day I never really gave it much thought but then after Rowling was all “Ugh, I wish I could take that back.” it got me thinking that they are totally wrong for each other! Ron is one of those insecure dudes that needs constant validation and will always get all passive aggressive because he imagines that everybody undervalues him. And dudes like that NEVER change. And Hermione is just way too to self assured to put up with that nonsense. I’m just sayin, I think they would have eventually split up. And I like the idea of Harry/Hermione way better because they were always respectful of one another, and they went through a lot of the same formative experiences together and I think they would make a good match. And also, lets be fair, Ginny is a big fat nothing. 

So anyways I was thinking about all this stuff and started drawing my ideal couples for the Potter books and it just sort of spiraled out of control and I drew Harry and Hermione’s wedding and I was like oh no WHAT HAVE I DONE. IT’S SO CHEESEBALLY. I even picked theme colors for the wedding. I’m so…I’m so ashamed. 

But anyways, these are my fantasy couples for the Potter Universe: Harry + Hermione, obvy. Then Ginny realizes she’s hella gay and dates her way through the wizarding world. Here I had her paired up with Katie Bell. And Ron ends up with a nice Indonesian muggle girl who is just always so impressed by his magical abilities and dazzled by the wizarding world.  And obviously she gets knocked up right away because Weasley men do not wrap that shit up.  And then Neville + Luna because they’re my favorites. ^_^

Soooo…yeah. SORRY NOT SORRY

Last night we were talking about all the other Earth-based SBURB sessions. Now, most of them were probably screwed from the start if they weren’t part of an ectobiological loop (unless there was a rash of meteor babies delivered in the 90s, which would be kind of funny) but we thought if any of the other sessions did get very far, they’d have to deal with a bunch of the same crap as the kids without any of the inside info. So this spiraled into imagining some sort of SBURB help forum with a bunch of questions and bug reports where an increasingly harried mod keeps going ‘it’s this ONE SESSION out there fucking everyone else up, I’m sorry’


‘There’s an unidentified object at the heart of my battlefield. No one mentioned this.’ ‘It seems to be corruption from our parent session #612a2. The players are still active but are only in communication with a four person session based in the US, #413b1. I’ll let you know if they ever start answering my PMs, but for now, here’s a link to a thread with people discussing fixes that worked for them.’

‘One of my timeloops should’ve been stable but now the whole timeline is flagged as doomed. Our Time player has checked everything but there’s no reason for it. HELP!!!’ There’s a rogue Time hero/boss local to the 612/413 session cluster. Most of the time he doesn’t affect us, but sometimes timeloops get snagged on his localized alpha. Destroy any of the following artifacts in your session, especially the puppet, and try again.’

‘CANCER UPDATE: The 612 data corruption manifests in an extremely aggressive archagent and a rapid onset Reckoning. Do not engage Jack Noir, and do not under any circumstances let him acquire a regent’s ring. We recommend you deploy Prospit dreamers to acquire the White King’s scepter and keep it safe to delay the Reckoning.’

‘There are red squiggly things in the sky. Is that bad??’ ‘Unfortunately session 413′s archagent got the black queen’s ring and is in the process of tearing all instances of our universe to shreds. I’d recommend you pick up the pace, because we’re now on a deadline courtesy of those fuckers.’

My dreamself died and usually I just have to deal with the horrorterrors but last time I fell asleep I was somewhere else, and there were a bunch of other people there. Is this a special level I unlocked?’ ‘Somehow the 612/413 cluster…broke… death??? I don’t fucking know. Avoid any gray skinned people you see - they tend to be hostile. [Blurry photo of Vriska.] DEFINITELY avoid this one.’

And eventually it just devolves into everyone complaining about those losers from 413 who keep ruining it for everyone and you get posts like ‘Apparently every planet gets one first guardian but GUESS WHO got Earth’s and PROTOTYPED it????’ and ‘There’s a cheat that lets you godmod the whole game and we’ve been looking for it for weeks but FUCKING SESSION 413′s Breath hero fell ass backwards into it on accident those fuckers’

The mod dreams of one day finding these people to scream at them in person

anonymous asked:

I keep imagining this scenario where Lance ends up separated from the others and accidentally overhears a group of bad guys revealing their plans/giving away some kind of vital information. Like maybe Lance is in his civilian clothes (they don't know he's a paladin) and a third guard ends up catching him spying. So then Lance starts speaking in Spanish bc he knows they don't speak it and they're like "Oh, lol okay. He didn't understand what we were saying just let him go."

okay but starting out with spanish sentences that just sort of spirals down to random spanish gibberish nonsense because it’s hilarious

“Si? Ay perdon, yo no sabia que hablen ingles en el espacio exterior. cojone, si yo sabia eso, podría haberlo aprendido, eh? este imperio debería chuparme. oye, adonde yo puedo conseguir un pan con bistec en espacio???”

anonymous asked:

Eh, the thing is. I don't think Liam would support Killian's all-consuming quest for revenge against Rumple. I feel the reason why Killian went so far as a villain was because there wasn't anyone to tell him "Stop. You're going too far." I can see the brothers Jones working for Pan in Neverland so they can leave, and Liam following Pan's more dirty orders so his brother's heart wouldn't be darkened as much.

But can you *also* see Killian outwardly agreeing not to let a quest for vengeance darken his heart, while internally struggling with his demons and really kind of coming to the conclusion that he must do something to make Rumple pay for Milah’s death, even if it means keeping it from Liam? Because I can totally see that. Plus you’re assuming that this AU Liam was still straight-laced and good hearted, but the whole point is that it’s an AU. A reimagining of things. And I think Liam would definitely do villainous things if it were for Killian’s sake (I mean, he did in canon which is why he was stuck in the UW) so I think seeing them both sort of spiral into the pirate lifestyle of violence, loot, and women while still maintaining that brotherly bond (OR perhaps having a strain on their relationship!) would be so interesting to see. (Canonically I doubt that either of them would become pirates if Liam had survived. It’s just a fun idea to play with.)

My Heart Will be There

Originally posted by welcome-to-my-broken-sanctuary

Peter Parker X Reader

Kinder Than You – Part 1

Word Count: 2133

Author: Princess Kate (Just kidding it’s Writer Kate… the one who writes)

Warnings: Talks about Stress and Anxiety attacks… sorry if that offends you, but I’m talking about my personal symptoms, and I’m not trying to glorify anxiety, stress, or any other problems whatsoever. 

A/N: HECK YES!!! Two parts in two days! I’m feeling very generous lately… Just kidding, I wanted to surprise you guys since you seemed to like this idea so much… Like I said, sorry about the warnings, but this was originally supposed to be like a way to channel my insecurities, if y’all would remember from part 1. OH YEAH I FORGOT TO MENTION PART 3 IS ON IT’S WAY!!! If you want to be tagged, just asked, I’m totally cool with that… And I’m actually really proud of my ending quote thingy, and yes, I DID COME UP WITH THAT LAST PART BY MYSELF… And I also don’t know why I make these so long since no one is reading anymore, but if you are, Please let me know if you like these little author insights… And go read the stupid fic already.

You were in the kitchen, making a batch of lemon cupcakes while Clint’s kids were watching a movie in the front room. The filling, a raspberry reduction, was almost done, and you were almost ready to start the buttercream frosting. Your phone beeped and a text popped up from Clint.

“Hey, we’re almost home, can you come open the garage?” You read quietly out-loud. You walked into the front room, turned off the TV, and picked up baby Nathaniel. “Cooper, Lila! Your parents are home!” You laughed at their excited faces, and followed them into the garage, pushing the button to deactivate the security system. The kids rushed to their parents as the car rolled in. You put Nathaniel down, and let him toddle towards his parents. You heard the timer go off for the cupcakes, and you slipped back inside. You smiled at the sunny yellow look of the treats. These were Peter’s favorite of the snacks that you would make regularly. When he was younger, he would try to stuff the entire cupcake into his mouth. It was hilarious to watch, but eventually, he learned to savor them, even if that didn’t stop him from eating most of the batch at super-speed. The thought of Peter made you hold your necklace, the one he had given you on your 14th birthday. You missed Peter loads, but the pain was a lot better being far away from him. It had been nearly 3 weeks since you left Stark Tower, and surprisingly, Nat had only accused Clint of kidnapping you a couple hundred times. You started frosting a cooled batch of cupcakes when someone poked your insides making you jump. You nearly dropped the cupcake, and turned to see Clint’s face grinning at you, and you stuck your tongue out at him. Clint had always taken a liking to you, and sometimes treated you like one of his kids, or other times, like his little sister. Overall, your relationship was very strong, like his and Wanda’s. Laura walked in grinning, and you ran up to hug her. Laura had been your mentor with Natasha before she retired, and she was very protective of you too. That’s why you loved coming here when you could sneak away from New York. Lila and Cooper treated you like their big sister, and you were the only person that baby Pietro (as you referred to him, since that was his middle name) would go to besides Laura and Nat. 

“Hey, Y/N! How were the kids?” Laura asked, hugging you tightly. Clint was inspecting the cupcakes for the one with the most frosting, just the way he liked them. Finding a suitable one, he picked it off the counter and bit into it.

“Perfect, as usual.” You smiled, genuinely. 

“Speaking of perfect,” Clint said through a full mouth. “I talked to Steve on Saturday. It seems your excuses were all too perfect. Why didn’t you tell us about the Peter thing?” His looked at you with raised eyebrows, and behind you, Laura was glaring at him. She had told him explicitly not to bring it up bluntly, knowing you would get flustered. Your hand flew up to fidget with your necklace again. It always reminded you of him, but you had been too attached to leave it at home, or even take it off. 

“I didn’t think it was that big of a deal.” You mumbled, lying. Clint and Laura looked at each other again, knowing how much the fight was bothering you.

“Apparently he’s been bugging everyone at that Tower to try and find out how you were doing, since you haven’t been answering any of his calls, either.” Clint poked, and you looked at the floor, biting your lip.

“Y/N, we’re just worried about you. Everyone is.” Laura said, putting her hand on your shoulder. “It’s not healthy to keep all your emotions wrapped up like this. I know it’s hurting you, but Peter is your best friend.”

“And your crush.” Clint wagged his eyebrows as he finished his second cupcake. You and Laura gave him the exact same expression at the same time, and he held back a laugh. 

“There isn’t exactly a lot to talk about.” You said, subconsciously rubbing the fading bruise on your cheek. Clint opened his mouth to retort, but the timer went off for another batch of cupcakes, so you slipped behind him without another word. 

***

“Bye! I’ll see you guys when the team comes out in a few months!” You called giving Lila, Cooper, Clint, Laura, and Nathaniel a last hug. You climbed into the quinjet, and waved good bye through the window as you flew higher and higher. You sighed happily, missing them already. You were about to settle back to write, but your phone beeped from the depths of your bag. You seriously considered ignoring it, but that always ticked Tony off when you ignored his texts, so you fished around for the device, found it, and clicked it on. A text showed up on the front from Aunt May, and you read the message.

“Hey, Y/N! Listen, I know you’re out of town, but we seriously need a shopping trip! When do you get back in?” May’s happy disposition shown through the text, but you cringed inwardly. You loved May, and she had always taken care of you like she was your mom, but you worried if she would ask you about Peter. You hadn’t taken it very well when Clint had interrogated you, and you had spent that night tossing and turning while memories of the fight swam around your mind. But it was May. She would know not to ask, right? You bit your lip, and texted back quickly.

“I’m flying back in right now.” You read quickly, and pressed send. It was only a second before you got a reply.

“Okay! It’s been long enough! How about tomorrow, Friday, since you guys have school off. I can pick you up at the Tower, I think Peter is going over there for his intern thing, anyway.” You sent affirmation to the plan, and sighed at relief that you would be able to avoid Peter. You settled back into the comfy interior of the jet, and watched the rain that had just begun to pound at the windows. 

***

“What do you think of this dress, Y/N?” May held up a very tight and form-fitting red dress, that would probably look amazing on you, but you were too self-conscious. You wrinkled your nose, and May put it back smiling. It was Friday, and you were having a great time, and Peter hadn’t been brought up once.

“So, why haven’t you been coming over lately? What happened between you and Peter?” May asked, trying to act nonchalant. Your heart dropped, and you knew your mind had spoken too soon. You looked at May, who was looking at you. 

“Pete- he didn’t tell you what happened?” You asked slowly, surprised that she didn’t know. Peter would always tell May everything. 

“Oh, he told me alright, but I want to hear your side.” May said, flipping through a few more dresses. She looked up at you suddenly with a gray sweater dress. You shook your head, trying to think of something to say.

“Um, I don’t… Well, I…” May smiled at your stumbling words. “What I mean to say is, I was just bugging Peter, obviously, and I sort of happened to walk in on this thing that Peter-” 

“He made out with Liz.” May said, her eyes shining with mischievous intent.

“Well, uh, yeah,” You said, laughing with wonder at how she knew that. “And, uh, Peter just got really mad, and it sort of spiraled into the big fight, and then…” You stopped talking, your side and cheek aching at the memory of what happened next.

“And then?” May asked, wondering what you were talking about. Peter hadn’t mentioned there was a second part to the fight.

“I-uh, I left.” You said, not thinking you would make it through the rest of the full story without breaking down. May knew you were hiding something, but she knew Peter had obviously really hurt you, in multiple ways. So she dropped the topic. The rest of the afternoon passed without mention of Peter, and May took you out for a shake before she dropped you back off at the Tower. On the way back to the Tower, May and you were talking in the car about a movie that you had been meaning to watch forever. 

“Oh, I bought that movie ages ago! You should come over tomorrow night and watch it!” May offered. Your face lit up with excitement, but then you remembered that Peter would probably be there. May saw your excitement dim as you bit your lip, and her concern about you heightened. “Peter won’t be there, he’s sleeping at Ned’s tomorrow night.” You hesitated, but then decided against your doubts. 

“Okay! As long as Peter won’t be there, I don’t want to press my presence on him.” You said, looking out into the bustling streets of New York. May smiled sadly at you, worried about how much Peter had affected you. Before long, you arrived at the Tower, and you said goodbye to May as you hopped out of the car. You ran up to your room, and fell back on your bed. You were alone, and the band of your anxiety quickly tightened around your chest, making it difficult to breathe. You froze on your bed, trying to get a grasp. These had been happening since the fight, but you used every last drop of your energy, and even dipped into some of your power’s supply to keep yourself looking normal and happy around everyone else. You looked at the wall, and counted to 10, the way Bruce had taught you when he found out you had anxiety and severe stress. The hyperventilating stopped, and the shaking started. These symptoms were the ones caused by stress, and you stood up quickly to stretch and try to relieve the tension. Spots started clouding your vision, and you fell back on your bed, trying not to think about how Peter would’ve helped you if he didn’t hate you.

***

“Peter, I’m home!” May called as she entered the apartment. Peter was sitting on the couch, his knees pulled up to his chest and his face in his hands, the way he curled up when he was worried about something. 

“Hey, May.” He said, his voice muffled and dejected. She put her bag down, and sat on the other side of the couch. 

“I was out with Y/N today.” She said. Peter’s head popped up at the sound of your name.

“She’s back? How did she look? What did she say? Is she okay? Where did you guys go?” Peter asked, the questions that had been building in his mind for a month came swirling out. May smiled sadly, the same way she had looked at you earlier. 

“She’s, um, she’s physically okay as far as I can tell,” Peter looked down again, knowing that you weren’t physically ‘alright’ thanks to him. May continued on slowly. “Peter, she seems really stressed, like the way she would get when she was younger. I think she was trying to hide it, but her hands and shoulders were shaking, and her lips were raw from biting them so much.” Peter put his face back in his hands, and let out a shaky breath. He had done this to you, and it had all been for Liz Allen. He wished he could go back, to save you from all this. 

“Peter, I’m really worried about Y/N. And you. Neither of you know how to survive without the other, and I know you can fix this. She thinks you hate her.” Peter flinched at the sentence. He felt it was too late. Maybe if he had caught you before you left, it wouldn’t be too late. But it was, and he had stopped trying to contact you a week after you left. He had given up on you, even though you had never given up on him. It killed him, just thinking about it. He got up from the couch without saying another word to his aunt. He walked into his room, and pulled out a paper he had saved from one of your old notebooks. He fell back on his bed with it, and read the note with the swirling hand-writing.

Friends forever, 

Never apart.

Maybe by distance,

But never by heart.

It was on of your favorite little quotes, but you had added something to the old saying.

He may not love me

But I do not care

For wherever he is

My heart will be there.


@miss-nerdalots @143amberrose

WELL, I posted it to twitter, so might as well post it here too….
This started out as me just trying to draw Dodomeki Choromatsu in my style….and then, well, it spiraled from there.

It was sort of an experiement in colour and mood lighting, as well as to see if I could still actually line art! At least, that’s my excuse……….

I’ll let you decide the context of the situation he’s in, hoho….*sweats quietly*

so do you imagine that when lena and kara get together 

or even when they start just hanging out and stubbornly not noticing how much they’re pining after each other

that eliza just casually starts momming the hell out of lena too

remembers how she takes her tea or coffee and makes/brings her a cup when she needs a refill like nbd of course hon

lowkey brags on how awesome lena is, nonchalantly squares up with people who disparage her

values and seeks her opinion on sciencey things, sends her dumb science jokes

cheerfully includes her in all invitations to family things

leaves her her own handwritten ‘don’t forget your gloves again, i saw this thing and i thought of you, i hope you have a good day today!!’ post-its next to kara’s and alex’s and maggie’s

comes up to her after yet another attempt on her life and just fucking gathers her up in a hug ‘i’m so glad you’re safe’ and when lena’s a little stiff with shock she’s like ‘oh my god are you hurt let me see honey where does it hurt?’

and lena’s sort of spiralling into ? ???? ???????? ????????? ?????????? and then what ??? are you ?? wanting from me? what is it you want

just waiting for the other shoe to drop because this is not how a mom acts

this is not how her mom ever acted

but it doesn’t stop and eliza never asks for anything and as far as eliza’s concerned she’s acquired another daughter

2

“Whether we turn to the dark or to the kiss of another;

Let us know this for leavetaking,

That I may not be heavy upon you,

That you may blind me no more.” 

~ Leave-Taking by Louise Bogan

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anonymous asked:

do the two a/b/o series on ao3 happen in the same continuity or are they different AUs altogether??

well eventually the a/b/o nonsense tag will have all the a/b/o nonsense - including the NiF fic – in it. The only fics that are officially a series are the Katsudon-hime&Baby ones. The Yuri fic and the Victor fic are separate for now.

anonymous asked:

7 PLEASE PLEASE PLESSEE

AU Mini-Fic challenge

7: Fake relationship AU

Summary: Dan has to go to his school reunion, and when he realises everyone but him seem to be settled down and married, he convinces Phil to pretend that he’s Dan’s husband for the night.

Words: 3,294 (not so ‘mini’ then, oops)

Sorry this took so long, I hope you like it! <3

* * *

“Listen, Phil. I need your help,” Dan said as he walked into the room. He switched off the TV and turned to face Phil, ignoring his noises of protest.

“I was watching that!” Phil whined with a scowl, but Dan just crossed his arms and sighed. He looked serious about whatever he was about to talk about, so Phil shut up and waited.

“My friend is having a big reunion party next week, where everyone I knew from school is going. It’s going to be hell, just full of people I hate having competitions over who’s the most successful now and who’s the most important.”

“So don’t go,” Phil said, frowning. He was still mad at Dan for interrupting his TV show, just so he could whinge about his old friends.

“I have to, I promised,” Dan said sullenly.

“So…how does this effect me?” Phil asked, raising an eyebrow. Dan began to blush as he fixed his eyes on the floor, shuffling uncomfortably. 

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