spillyoursecrets

I’m new to this so please don’t judge….
Well im a 19 year old girl who Thot she was doin the right thing. At the age of 10 I knew what I wanted and that was to join the marine corp or go to a big college on a sports scholarship . In school I was a very athletic girl, a jock as I’m sure u would call it. I was our point guard in bball the main setter in vball the Catcher in softball and I placed 3rd in state for both shot and discus my freshman year. At the end of my freshman year I could barely raise my right arm. (I’m right handed btw) 6 doctors later we finally found out what I had, at age 14 I was diognosed with the rare winged scapula. I had one of the worst cases of it. It took them from the end of freshman year till December of my junior year to get it fixed. The doctor told me that I’d never be able to play sports again because of the surgery they had done. They took my major pectoral muscle and tubed it underneath my armpit then screwed it into my scapula. After surgery I went through 6 months of recovery and crucial physical therapy and proved to my doctor that I was able to play sports. Senior year rolls around and I finally lost the 40 lbs of extra weight I had gained from being cooped up from the surgery. I looked good and was in the best shape of my life. I felt like I was on top of the world. I could do 100 pushups right there on the spot easily. By this time I had already talked to the marines recruiter and they told me they didnt think I would b able to join because of the rare surgery/injury. I kept pushin on till thy finally would take me to meps. I beasted it up on the court in basketball averaging 17 points and 23 rebounds a game! Being only 5.7" that’s pretty good especially since there were two 6footers with me. In softball I was a pretty dam good center fielder. I could fire the ball quick and smooth. After my third game I had some college scouts come talk to me but I turned them down cuz I knew I was going into the marines. I graduate and what not and work my ass of so I stay in shape gettin ready for basic. I got set back 3 different times! Finally on jan 3 2012 I left for basic training. I was one of the top recruits due to my pft scores. I made it thru phase 2 outta 3 of trainng and I get hurt. A girl snapped my arm back during martial arts and it blew the muscle off the screws in my shoulder. The marine corp had to medically discharge me because it was so Messed up. Because of that I feel like I have failed. I’ve failed my family friends boyfriend and most of all my country. That’s how I feel most days other days I think that this was all a just a plan for me. Mayb god was trying to tell me something when I was set back so many times but I just kept fighting it. Mayb he was just trying to make me realize that I have better things ahead of me idk. But at the moment I’m just hoping that he helps me get my head straight.
I’m gonna get a tattoo with the quote
““I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.” I think it will help me break this mental barrier I have thinkin that I failed. But for now it that’s how I feel