spiderpool x

You're not rival for me
  • Me: *reading fanfics in class in my phone*
  • Substitute teacher: Student give me your phone and pay attention to the class.*take away my phone*
  • Me: *take out the other phone*
  • Substitute teacher: Pay attention!*take away the other phone*
  • Me: *take out the iPad*
  • Substitute teacher: The fuck?*take away the iPad*
  • Me: *take out the iPad mini*
  • Substitute teacher: Stop!*take away the iPad mini*
  • Me: *take out the laptop*
  • Me: You're not rival for me *continue reading*
  • Substitute teacher: She's always like this?
  • Student 1: Only when is about gay ships
  • Student 2: You're lucky that she bring all her stuff
  • Substitute teacher: Why you said that?
  • Student 1: Yesterday she only bring one phone
  • Substitute teacher: And?
  • Student 2: How do you think our teacher end in the hospital?
  • Substitute teacher: Oh
  • Peter: Don't say a word!
  • Wade: ....fergalicious.
  • Peter: I said no words!
  • Wade: Oh, I see how it is. Two weeks ago, playing Scrabble, it wasn't a word, but now it is. How convenient for you.
  • Wade: I can say things that will haunt you
  • Peter: Sure, man.
  • Wade: An octopus is just a wet spider.
  • Peter: What?
  • [later that night]
  • Peter: [staring at the ceiling] ...fuck

“I’m sorry for my husband’s behaviour. You’ll be nicer, right Tony? Welcome to the family, Wade.”

“Dont feel too welcomed.”


  • Wade: What's your biggest fear?
  • Peter: Being forgotten.
  • Wade:
  • Wade: Fuck, that's deep. Mine is the Kool Aid Man, but I feel kinda stupid about it now

SuperFamily texts!

“What have you done Wade?!” Peter exclaimed

“It’s just dinner with your parents, babe.”

requested by @evilday-emeralds

do you have a request? message me!

Fuck it.
—  Me, as I’m about to search my OTPs tag

is falling asleep whilst reading smut at 2am classed as virtual sleepy morning sex?