spend money on drugs

Mixed episode things:

- Eats a whole fridge out
- Never hungry
- hypersexual
- no sex drive whatsoever
- no don’t touch me don’t even look at me
- bury me in all your affections (@strangers)
- Want to sleep literally all the time
- Not sleeping till 6 am and waking up feeling like i slept for 20 hrs at 8 am
- Motivation? What’s that?
- Getting 20 billion things done at 4 am 
- Angry and wants to fight everyone (does fight)
- Sad and wants to cry (does cry)
- Impulsive decisions??? 
- MONEY SPENDING RECKLESS WHY
- Doing like 6 kinds of drugs and making plans for more

1. My parents are lovely people and I regret treating them the way I did
2. I’ve gained some weight
3. My thoughts are not always as healthy as I wish them to be
4. I love you
5. I’m not sure if I made the right decision
6. I should call my sister more often, it’ll make us both feel better
7. I miss you
8. I’m in love with someone else
9. The thought of dying comforts me again
10. I shouldn’t spend so much money on drugs
11. I’m not proud of who I am
12. I’m terrified of tomorrow and the days after
13. Insecurities are killing me
14. I wish you loved me back
15. I want to kiss you so bad
16. I’m getting bad again
17. I want to hurt myself
18. School is about to start
19. It’ll be okay
—  19 obvious things (I’m still in denial)
Fun Toxic Thoughts of an Addict

This is amazing! I’ll be one of the few people to control my drug use. I can function while staying high. I’m not going to overdo it. I’m only going to do enough to tolerate life. I’ll only overdo it a little bit; only sometimes. I’ll never run out of money. I’ll keep my priorities straight. 

Wow, I never thought I’d spend that much money on drugs. I dont feel like going to school/work today, I’m going to stay home, do drugs, and do my own thing. Fuck everybody else. 

WHAT ABOUT ME

WHAT 

ABOUT 

ME

 I can get shit done, now! People like being around me and think I’m funny! I can even control my emotions! I never cry anymore, it’s amazing.

I’ll never snort anything, though. Only when I’m really desperate, but I’ll never let myself get to that point. NO way.

 Okay, I’ll just stick to snorting because it hits me quicker, but I will NEVER shoot up. I dont ever see myself doing that, I’m terrified of needles.

Alright fine, I’m just going to try shooting up this one time. JUST THIS ONE TIME, THOUGH.

I cant do this anymore.

Why did I let myself get to this point?

I cant believe I was ever scared of needles, I love them.

Everyone and everything else is so dumb, it’s not worth it.

I cant get out, I’ve gone too far.

Everyone can tell something’s up with me, now. 

It’s so obvious I have a problem.

Everyone else has the problem, I’m fine.

There’s no hope for me.

It’s over.

I either have to quit or… I dont even know or care anymore. Die, I guess.

I cant quit, I’ve tried to so many times… every time I dont have drugs, I’m so sick.

Nobody understands, nobody cares… I cant do this alone. I’m so alone.

If I tell them what’s wrong, they’ll just freak out.

I’m dealing with this on my own, what do I do what do I do

I need to get high, I cant deal with this

When did THESE become my problems

I’m so stupid

FUCK

FUCK

4

LADIES. SAVE YOUR MONEY.
I’ve seen a few good posts on saving and using money wisely in the bowl, but I’ve seen more about spending that hard earned money on drugs or bags or clothes or makeup or shoes or nails or whatever.
Yes, these are important things for SBs. Though honestly those are the first things I’d go shopping for with a POT/SD- they’re things he wants you to have/do so make him pay for it.
I included all those things in my spending money: if I have the cash for them, great, if not, then my SD isn’t giving me enough to make it worth my while- My priorities come first.

Since I did all this work for myself to help me budget, I figured I’d share it with you. If it helps one person sort out their finances, great.

I included my basic essentials budget along with my savings goals, what those add up to in $ and how much I’ll have at the end of a year if I were to save that much consistently (not that that will ever happen, but it gives a decent idea)

Keep in mind: I am technically financially stable, though I have no income besides sugaring, and the people I keep close are also stable. I have a comfortable savings account (a good chunk of this is in investments), a decent retirement fund (for a 20 something), and scholarships and loans cover most if not all of my tuition. My debt is minimal and I’m half hoping a SD will cover it all at once when I tell him how much it is. I also don’t have to spend a huge amount on my looks as I can survive without foundation, contour, etc, workout at home frequently and make POTs/SDs/rich vanillas buy most of my date outfits.
Thus, you will likely need to rearrange things according to your needs and priorities.

‘Savings’ covers: travel, tuition, investments, other large purchases (want to buy a house to rent out), etc.

For my basic essentials budget: I sort all my cash into envelopes when I get it, thus the major headings of Bank, Essentials, Rent, etc.

Why ‘Retirement’ is so big for me: COMPOUND INTEREST. (My retirement savings are in investments)

Okay so GTA Trevor who comes from a broken home. A father whos not there and a mother on to many drugs to really be considered a mother. He didnt want to get into the life of crime but he had to he had no other choice, his mother spends all their money on drugs. So at age 12 he starts with pick pocketing, a friendly smile and small sticky fingers being able to reach into pockets without anyone giving him so much as a glance. And they barely scrape by. At age 16 he starts robbing stores. Small convenience stores at first and slowly worked his way up. At age 17 was when he first killed somebody. While he always used a gun during robberies they were empty, just for show, but that time it wasnt. That time he had a friend with him who loaded the gun. He got nervous the cops were coming and it was taking to long so he panicked and shot grabbed money and fucking ran. Trevor still remembers that night.

Of course he still rob and pick pockets. But one night he pick pocketed Jack, theres was a hand on his wrist and threat spoken before he knew it. He dropped the wallet so quickly and started to apologize. And Jack notices how skinny he is, how sunken his eyes, his dirty hair and to small dirty clothes and she realizes that this kid either doesnt have a home or he has a real shitty one so she takes him back to the penthouse. And of course Geoff is upset, they dont need another person, but Jack manages to make him give him. So Jack makes him food and gives him some of Gavin’s clothes despite Gavins protests and lets him shower and Trevor gladly accepts it because he knows he needs it. He knows he need the food and clothes and maybe hes in the onethous of LS’s most dangerous crew but its not like he has anything to lose.
Jeremy is the first one to approach him and talk to him and while Trevor is quiet he cant help but smile at the man.

redflawedglass  asked:

My biggest thought about it is that you gave that story (Dangerous Habit) almost a happy ending, when nobody's around who can stop the Death Star and the rebellion is failing :( But Leia and Oola have no idea! They're living a better life on Malastare, realizing they're in love, not spending the money they owe Fett on drugs, etc. If Boba is still in Protect Them mode, how far is he going to take that, because I imagine that would provide most of the conflict. (cont)

2) Or Leia trying to find out about this Force, with even fewer resources than Luke had, and Boba saying Do Not Do The Thing, You Will Die, I’ll have to lie about knowing about it, etc, but he would have to come around or they couldn’t be together. :D Maybe he takes the tack of “educating” her about how terrible the Jedi were and she tries to find a different Force path. Oola supports Leia on this too, though adventuring to Find Herself doesn’t seem very practical, and they need to make money.


OH. What if Luke is a spoiled prince who’s completely oblivious to Bail and Breha’s involvement in the rebellion. He’s gambling away his inheritance on Malastare at the club where Oola works when Alderaan is destroyed and suddenly he has Defining Life Moment.