spencer hawkes

Addicting...Part 3

Sorry, guys!  I had this queued for 11:00 PM…not AM.  We are celebrating my son’s 3rd birthday today and tomorrow, and things have been hectic!  Please excuse the hiccup, and I hope you enjoy the next part of this story!

Again, I’m so sorry!  Here it is, comin’ ‘atcha!

(Part 1  Part 2  Part 4  Part 5  Epilogue)

Three days.

For three days you shook.  You shook, and you sweat, and you tossed, and you turned.

You vomited, you screamed, you cursed…

…and you even tried to hit your colleague.

“Fuck you,” you would mumble as you threw your wobbly fist out, only to be caught by Spencer’s hand mid-air as he dipped down and brushed your sweat-soaked hair from your forehead.

“Fuck you,” you would whisper as you turned over in bed, groaning with every popping ache in your body.

You felt as if you were being torn limb by limb.

You didn’t realize your team members coming and going.  You didn’t smell the flowers adorning your room, or the smell of food Rossi was bringing over to cook for freezer meals.  You don’t remember Hotch sitting on the edge of your bed crying over your experience during the case, nor do you remember J.J. coming in and recounting her experience with being held hostage herself.

You didn’t even remember wetting the bed and Spencer transferring you to the bath while he cleaned you up and fixed your sleeping space.

When you finally did come to, five days into your withdrawals, your head was aching, your throat was sore, your eyes are puffy, and your skin is clammy.

“Ugh,” you moan, slowly sitting yourself up in bed as the room begins to turn.

“Shit,” you spit quietly, pressing the heels of your palms into your throbbing eye sockets.

But like a hawk, Spencer had heard you from the kitchen.

“Y/N?” he calls out, getting up from your kitchen chair as he comes slinking down the hallway.

“Y/N?” he asks again, sticking his head into your bedroom as he takes stock of your upright figure.

You heaved a heavy sigh before standing to your feet, teetering slightly as you turn towards him.

“Whoa whoa whoa whoa, slow down,” he coos, rushing towards you as he juts his arms out, his hands grasping your upper arms as you try to get your feet from under you.

“You threw my pills away,” you bite.

“I did,” he says, studying your face, your eyes closed and heavy.

“You threw me into this withdrawal,” you groan as your head lobs forward lightly.

“I did,” he whispers, wrapping his arm tightly around your back as he uses his free hand to lob your head back before sliding his hand behind your neck, cradling your head in his hand as you finally peel your eyes open to look up at him.

“Thank you,” you whisper, almost inaudibly, as your eyes flutter closed again.

“You’re welcome,” Spencer chokes out as he takes stock of your weak body.

“I stink,” you groan as you crinkle your nose.

“Would you like me to get you in a bath?” Spencer offers as you snicker lightly.

“You’re not seeing me naked,” you huff.

“I already have,” he says before catching his admission.

He felt your body pull taut as you press your hands against his chest.

“Y/N, you can’t stand on your own just yet-”

But you succeeded in pushing him away, throwing yourself against your bedroom wall to steady your wobbling body as you furrow your brow, keeping your back towards your colleague.

“You what?” you growl lowly.

“You uh..a couple of days ago, you urinated in your sleep.  You were having a nightmare, a-a-and calling out-”

“How does that equate to seeing me naked, Reid?” you bite.

“I put you in a bath to wash you down so that I could get the bed cleaned off,” Spencer says lightly, like a wounded puppy getting into trouble for running into the street.

“You saw-”

You felt tears rise to your eyes as you think back to your captors, the way they chained you down when they had no need for you.  The way they raked you against the moldy stone walls when they wanted what you could provide for them…

You winced at the phantom pains running beneath the thick scars cascading down your back.

“Yes,” Spencer whispers, dipping his head down as he shoves his hands into his pockets.

“Well, I can clean myself just fine now,” you breathe, clearing your throat of its knot as you lean against the wall to help you along towards the bathroom.

“Y/N, please-”

“You’ve helped enough, Spencer!” you roar, your throat going hoarse almost immediately as Spencer stops in his tracks, his brow furrowing deeply in worry as his puppy dog eyes begin to set in on his face.

“Time to go home,” you croak as you reach out for the bathroom door.


Opening the door as you stumble into the bathroom, you fall to your knees as you hear Spencer scurry up behind you.

But you hold your hand out, forcing him to stop as he hovers above your trembling, weak body.

“Do me a favor?” you ask lightly.

“Anything,” he breathes.

“Call Hotch on your way out.  Let him know I’ll see the team Monday.”

“Y/N, I can’t-”

The growing red that began flushing down your neck caused Spencer to rear up and take a step away from you.

He was legitimately angering you.

And he didn’t want to cause you anymore pain.

“Ok,” he breathes, his eyes filling with tears as he digs around in his pocket for his cell phone, “Ok, I’ll call Hotch.”

“Thank you,” you whisper as you scoot your legs in, your arm reaching out as you latch on to the side of the door.


As he whips his body around, at the ready to do whatever it is you need…and silently hoping that you would still allow him to stay…his heart simultaneously leaps and drops at the same time when you go to speak.

“You check the back of the guest bathroom toilet?” you ask.

“Uh…n-…no.  I don’t think that was a place I checked,” he stammers.

“Before you leave…?  You should.”

And then you swung your bathroom door closed, shutting out your life…as well as Spencer.


My Top 10 Science Books
Death By Black Hole- Neil deGrasse Tyson
Genome- Matt Ridley
The Demon-Haunted World- Carl Sagan
Wonders of the Universe- Brian Cox
Why Evolution is True- Jerry Coyne
Hyperspace- Michio Kaku
The Journey of Man- Spencer Wells
A Brief History of Time- Stephen Hawking
A Universe from Nothing- Lawrence Krauss
The Greatest Show on Earth- Richard Dawkins (Yeah, he is problematic, but he is spot on in evolutionary biology.)

As far as T.V. and movies go I find a lot of great stuff on Netflix. I really like all the David Attenborough videos (Life on Earth, The Blue Planet, etc.) and all of the Brian Cox Videos (Wonders of the Solar System, Wonders of the Universe, Wonders of Life.)

Thank you for the great questions :)

a/n: i kind of went crazy with this! LOL. The beginning is gross, but it gets better.

prompt: Prompt: Alison makes spencer jealous and insecure about toby. (By the way I loved your chicken pox prompt) a/n: THANK YOU :D

+ Can you do the “ali makes spencer insecure and toby comforts her” one first

Alison has been making a lot of attempts to bring Spencer down since they broke away from her, but it’s not until one day in the Rosewood High girls’ restroom that she actually gets under the brunette’s skin. 

They keep silent first. Spencer ignores the blonde, but the blonde does not do the same. She watches her–like a hawk. Once Spencer is done washing her hands, she turns to Alison, who is smugly leaning against the wall, staring at the brunette with her cold blues.

“If you have something to say, just say it,” she demands sternly, crossing her arms over her chest.

Alison moves off of the wall, smiling devilishly. “I was just thinking…” she turns to the mirror, fixing her hair. “Why is it that we always have the same taste in men?” she glances towards Spencer, innocently. “First there was Ian, and then Toby…”

Spencer hardens, grinding her teeth. It’s not even the meaning of her words that aggravate her. It’s just his name being spoken through her malicious lips.

“Did Toby ever tell you?” she turns to her rival, her blue eyes a challenge, while her smile is innocent. “That he and I…well,” she smirks. “I don’t kiss and tell.”

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