spencer d

Snowbound

A/N: This is a repost of an old story that I deleted from my other blog. But it’s wintery so therefore kinda Christmasy? I do intend to write a Christmas one shot at some point.

Oh and it’s smutty…

“Y/N, we should go. The snow’s starting to get heavier.”

“But I’m having so much fun!” You whirled to a stop on your ice skates, in front of your best friend and colleague Spencer Reid.

You’d been driving home from lecturing at a college a few hours away when you’d spotted a deserted frozen lake that just called out to you. It looked beautiful, it had snowed over the last few days and it looked like a winter wonderland Christmas card. In your youth you’d been a budding figure skater until a shattered ankle had put paid to your dreams of pursuing it professionally. You still kept a pair of skates in the trunk of your car in the winter and you’d driven off the main road and found the entrance to the lake, begging Spencer to allow you to skate for a while.

He’d agreed and had found a log to rest on for a while, shoving his hands into his pockets as he watched you with a smile on his face.

You must have been out there for an hour before he called you back, snow starting to fall again quickly and the sun setting in the sky.

“I know you’re having fun, and I’m enjoying watching you. But I’m cold, and it’s getting dark. And we’re still at least two hours away from home. Plus… The snow is coming down pretty quick now.”

It was. You couldn’t skate very fast without feeling the force of the snowflakes against your face. He was right. And he’d been a really good sport about sitting in the cold. You carefully walked over to where he was waiting with your boots and plopped down next to him on the log, swapping your skates for more suitable footwear.

“One day, I will have you out on skates Spencer.”

“Sure you will. Probably on the same day you manage to beat me at chess.” He smiled at his joke and you nudged him playfully.

You trudged through the snow back to the car, your heads down against the falling snow. Now that you’d stopped moving on the ice, you were quickly cooling down.

Spencer dug in his pocket for your keys and pressed the button to release the central locking. Instead of the lights flashing and a bleeping you got nothing.

He pressed the button again.

Nothing.

Okay.

Approaching the drivers side door, you took the keys off him and unlocked the door manually, leaning over and opening his door. You both shut yourselves in away from the cold as you inserted the key into the ignition, turning it to start the engine.

Nothing happened. You and Spencer looked at each other as you tried again, pumping your foot on the gas pedal and jiggling the wheel in case you’d accidentally engaged the steering lock. Still nothing.

“Fuck.” You muttered trying again.

“Y/N. It’s no use. I’m pretty certain the batteries dead.” He pointed to the cigarette lighter which had his phone charger plugged in, his phone still attached. “I’m sorry. I thought I’d disconnected it.”

“SHIT”

“Pop the hood.” Spencer told you and you shot him a look.

“Do you know anything about cars Spencer?”

“I know a lot about a lot of things… Just do it. You might be surprised.”

Sighing, you did as he instructed, grimacing as he opened the door again and moved around to the bonnet. He stood there for a few minutes, bent over and you opened your door calling out to him.

“Anything?”

He dropped the bonnet securing it again, and got back in. “Yeah…. No.”

“So that was a pointless exercise and only ended up letting more cold air in.” You spat out.

“Hey, don’t get mad at me. We all make mistakes and I apologised. You’re the one that wanted to stop remember?”

You guessed he was right. It was both of your faults.

He pulled out his cell and dialed a number from memory, mouthing ‘Triple A’ at you.

You only heard one side of the conversation but it wasn’t sounding good. When he ended the call he shook his head.

“There’s been a huge pile up twenty miles down the road. Caused by the snow. What we’re getting here is just start of it. Apparently there’s a huge storm setting in. There’s no responding vehicle available for at least four hours.”

“You are shitting me.”

“Afraid not.”

“What about Derek? Could he come out?”

As soon as he started talking again, you realised what a stupid question that had been. “We’re still two hours away from home anyway. If there’s been a pile up he’s not gonna be able to get through either unless he goes the long way around. And if the snow is that bad….”

“I get it, I get it. We’re stuck.”

“Yep. They said to leave my cell on and they’ll call as soon as a vehicle is on its way.”

Right. You both switched your phones into ultra power saving, turning off all apps after quickly sending the team a message informing you of the situation in case you were needed. You and Spencer weren’t going anywhere for a while.

Climbing between the seats into the back, you leant over into the trunk and pulled out the emergency sleeping bag you kept in there. It was a bit musty, but nothing too bad. You always kept some emergency things in the trunk after you’d had to spend a full night at the side of a road when you were nineteen. Hopefully this wouldn’t be that long. You unzipped it and spread it out over you and Spencer looked back at it longingly.

“Fine… We can share. Come back here then.”

He struggled to fit between the gap in this seats, cracking his head on the roof of the car and causing you to giggle.

“Not funny, Y/N. Now share the warmth. Do you have anything else back there that could help us out?”

He wriggled next to you and you fit the sleeping bag around you both.

“I’ve got a couple of bottles of water and some protein bars. And some chips.”

“Well at least we won’t starve.”

Ninety minutes passed and you were starting to feel extremely cold. You and Spencer had sipped a bottle of water between you and shared a protein bar. Both of you had eaten a fairly large meal before you’d left for the journey home so you weren’t too worried about going hungry, you were just cold.

You and Spencer had talked for a bit but now you had your head resting on his shoulder, your arms linked together for warmth. You’d both zipped your coats up as high as they’d go and burrowed your head down into your scarves.

You fidgeted, your hands were freezing. You’d left your gloves at home and typically Spencer had misplaced his too.

“You okay?” Reid asked, his breath showing in the air.

“My hands… ”

“Here.” He took them into his and rubbed them, the friction helping a little.

“Spencer, I’m starting to worry. I’m really, really cold.” You told him and he looked down and away for a second.

“I’m not worried as such… But I’m freezing too. Erm… There is one thing… Actually. No. Forget it.”

“Tell me.. If it’ll keep me warm, I’d literally do anything right now.”

He looked unsure and you nudged him. “Spencer. Seriously. I need to get warm.”

“Okay.” He looked around the car and then back at you. “This will probably work better if you sit on my lap. It’s either that, or we collapse the seats.”

“Theres too much crap in the trunk to do that.” You started to shift your weight, getting ready to climb onto him, not even questioning him until he started to unzip his coat, removing it along with his sweater and scarf. As he started to unbutton his shirt you realised why he’d hesitated before telling you.

Body heat.

But it worked better when it was skin on skin.

Fuck it.

Lowering the sleeping bag, you followed suit; removing your coat and outer layers, stopping when you got to your bra. That was staying on.

“Trousers too?” You asked and he nodded, already slipping his off. Again you copied him and when you were both down to your underwear you climbed onto his lap, feeling slightly self conscious.

He shrugged his thick coat back over his shoulders, not putting his arms through the sleeves and you pulled the sleeping bag back around you.

“So…. I guess we snuggle right?”

He nodded, giving you an apologetic look.

Okay. Whatever.

You leant in, pressing your chest against his and resting your head back on his shoulder. Spencers hands went around your back, rubbing up and down your bare skin as you cocooned you both in the thick material.

As uncomfortable as you felt sitting on your colleagues lap, this was tons warmer. You wriggled, shuffling your knees closer to the back of the seat and pressing as close as you could.

“Don’t wriggle. Please.” Spencer sounded choked and his hands gripped your waist.

“Sorry. Just trying to get warmer.”

“I know. But….just don’t.”

“Shit, am I hurting you?” You asked.

“It’s.. not that.”

“Then what?”

He coughed, clearing his throat. “I don’t want to make this awkward because I’m finally starting to feel warm but…. Well. You’re a very attractive female. And you’re on my lap wearing very little.”

Oh.

OH!

Wait.

“You think I’m attractive?”

“I’m not blind, Y/N.”

Huh.

You wriggled again, his fingers digging into your hips this time.

“Stop it.” He hissed at you.

“What if I don’t want to?”

“Y/N. I’m not in the mood to be made a fool out of.”

“What? Spencer, I’m not trying to make a fool out of you. I just find it amusing that you’ve just admitted to finding me attractive and I sure as hell think you’re hot. And like you say, I AM sat in your lap, semi naked.”

You pulled away from his shoulder so you could look at him, grinning at the confused and shocked look on his face.

“W-w-what?”

“You heard. Don’t act so shocked either.”

When you shifted this time, he didn’t grasp you so hard, his hands still on your hips but no longer in a vice like grip.

“You think…. Me? Really?”

“I’m not blind, Spencer.” You echoed his own words.

Thinking quickly you asked him. “Triple A said four hours right?”

He nodded.

“And that they’d call when they were on their way?”

“Yes. Why?”

“I can think of another way to get warm… A lot warmer than this. And a hell of a lot funner than this too. If you’re game?”

He gulped before licking his lips.

“I’m game.” He whispered.

“Excellent.”

Lowering your head to his neck, you started to place gentle kisses up and down, nibbling softly on his ear lobe and rolling your hips lightly. He stopped trying to still your movements and instead started trailing up and down your sides, tickling your skin.

Slowly dragging your lips across his jawbone, his light stubble chafing your lips, you stopped just shy of his mouth.

“Sure you’re game?” You asked once more.

He nodded in response, his lips parting as you placed yours against his.

Oh god..

Your kisses started slow and then quickly built into passionate urgings, your mouths moving against other in a way that you’d never thought you’d be doing with Reid. Sure, you thought Spencer was attractive, and you got on extremely well with him. You’d even go as far to say that you harboured a small crush for him.

You just never thought you’d act on it.

You rolled your hips again hearing him groan, a deliciously low sound that you wanted to hear again and again. Sliding back and forth gently you ground your pelvis against his lap, feeling him hard beneath you, another groan escaping his throat as you kissed.

You repositioned yourself slightly so that you were on the receiving end of the friction you were creating as you rocked your hips to and fro. A gasp caught on your lips and you felt him grin against you mouth.

Feeling bolder, he slid his hands around to your front, palming your breasts through your bra.

It was good job you were in a relatively secluded area, the windows of the car were now completed misted over.

Spencer tugged on your bra straps, sliding them down your arms and reaching behind your back for the clasp. You allowed him to remove it, making sure the sleeping bag was positioned so that if anyone did suddenly appear, you wouldn’t get shopped for publicly indecency.

Reid broke the kiss and pulled back to look at you, his eyes raking over your chest. He breathed in deeply, his eyes darkening.

“Like what you see?” You asked cockily, trying to break some of the tension.

“What’s not to like?” Spencer leant forward and pressed his warm lips to your breastbone, his hands moving over your thighs, sliding higher as you continued to grind gently against him.

“Stop moving for a second.. ” His whispered, his breath tickling your skin as he kissed his way across your chest to your nipple, lightly circling it with his tongue before sucking it into his mouth, flicking your hard bud.

“Oh fuck” You whimpered. You could no longer feel the cold, only the warmth coursing through your body. Spencer sucked harder, his tongue teasing you and sending shivers down your spine straight to your groin. His fingers moved higher up your thighs, stroking against the fabric of your underwear which you were sure had to be wet now.

“Spence… Fuck.”

His thumb grazed over your clit, making you shudder lightly. Realising he was in the right place, he started to rub over the fabric, glancing up at you as he did, biting down softly on your breast.

You started to pant lowly, biting on your bottom lip as Spencer massaged your clit through your panties.

“Oh god….oh sweet fuck… ” You gasped, starting to grind on him again. He moaned loudly biting down harder and you cried out.

“Shit. Too hard?” He pulled away.

“No… But… ” You lifted yourself off him slightly and reached for his boxers. He got the message and raised his hips and slid them down.

Resting back down, you reached between your bodies and pulled your panties to one side, using your hands to position him against your lips.

“Do we….. ?” He asked.

“Pill.” You breathed out, allowing him to slide in slowly, wincing slightly at the new sensation.

“Fuck.” Spencer groaned out.

“Yep.” You agreed and started rocking against him, his hand slipping back between you to resume it’s ministrations on your clit.

Resting your forehead to his, you moved. Rolling your hips against his and clenching around him as jolts of pleasure shot through you. He bucked underneath you, pushing himself deeper inside as you both soon fell into a perfect rhythm with each other.

Spencers fingers kept up their motions on your clit and you slowly felt your orgasm start to build, your legs trembling when it started to overtake you. You started to grind harder and faster on him, his own moans coming faster now. You came a few minutes later, crying out his name as you did. You shuddered on top of him, your thighs clenching as you continued to move up and down, Spencers hands now moving to your hips to help with your pace.

“Oh fuck… I’m gonna… ”

He didn’t need to finish, you felt him releasing himself inside of you in short bursts. You slowed your movements, bringing them to a halt.

“Well…” You breathed out. “I don’t know about you, but I’m a hell of a lot warmer.”

“Same… Almost too warm, not that I’m going to complain.”

Just then, his phone started to sing and you scrambled for it, feeling a warm sticky fluid running down your thighs as he slipped out.

“Sorry….” He said hurriedly, grabbing for his cell and answering it.

It was Triple A. They had a vehicle ready and he was on his way. He’d be about fifteen minutes, they told Spencer.

You hurriedly pulled your clothes back on and wiped down the interior windows so you watch for their arrival.

“Y/N?” Spencer asked, nerves in his voice.

“Hmmmm?”

“Was that…. Was that like a one time thing?”

You glanced back to see him looking away quickly.

“It’s an as many time as you want it to be thing, Spencer. ”

“Okay, good.”

“But Reid? Next time… You really don’t need to break my car. Just ask!”

“I didn’t… I… I… Y/N, I swear…”

You laughed at him, seeing headlights approaching in the distance.

“I know Spencer… I know. ”

SPENCER’S TWIN IS A.D. AND WAS THE TRUE QUEEN OF HEARTS & BLACK WIDOW+MELISSA AND MONA ARE HELPING A.D.

Remember when Mona revealed to the Liars in 4x01 (“A is for A-L-I-V-E”) that Melissa was one of the Queen of Hearts, along with Wilden?

Well, no. She wasn’t.

When they were watching the tape, Emily questioned who the second Queen of Hearts was. Mona, eyeing at Spencer, responded, “Your sister.”

The video was shut down by Big A (Charlotte) before it could be proven it was her sister, aka Melissa, which is what everyone was thinking as she is Spencer’s only known sibling.

I don’t understand why they couldn’t have shown that Melissa was the Queen of Hearts to the audience if she was. That’s because she wasn’t, and it was Spencer’s twin!

Melissa and Mona, as well as Charlotte, all knew of the existence of Spencer’s twin, who is now A.D. When Spencer was questioning Melissa about her being the Queen of Hearts, Melissa abruptly kept stopping her at sentences, or not replying to some of her questions. Melissa claimed that she has been protecting Spencer since the beginning, but I think not. Not Spencer, but her twin.

Veronica (Melissa’s mother and Spencer’s supposed mother) has had cancer twice (as we know of). What if after she had Melissa, she developed cancer, and this stopped her from having children? She could’ve wanted a second child after she had beat cancer, so Mary Drake became the surrogate mother of her child. However, she fell pregnant with twins, but Veronica only wanted one.

When Spencer and Aria went to see Dr. Cochran in 7x08 (”Exes and OMGs”), the man who delivered Mary’s babies, he said he dealt with two of them. Now, if he had delivered Charlotte too, who is the eldest child, why couldn’t he have said, “I delivered two separate babies.”

Mary wasn’t allowed to keep the second baby after a while due to the strict rules at Radley, and also because she was a mental patient who had history of “killing a baby” (when that was actually Jessica). The twin was probably raised in Radley too somewhere.

Charlotte knew of the twin’s existence and the twin was the TRUE Black Widow! Sara Harvey claimed herself to be the identity of the BW to protect Spencer’s twin, whom she was good friends with herself and knew that’s what Charlotte wanted her to do.

The Black Widow had brunette hair, and her body was identical to Spencer’s structure:

Her twin’s motive would be that Spencer got to live a normal life—while she was raised in a mental institution. She was jealous and sick of Spencer. Initially, she wanted to meet her twin for the first time, but something must’ve happened that stopped her.

On the night of Jenna’s blinding, I believe her twin might’ve been watching Spencer, and/or possibly wanted to meet her. When the stink bomb set off, it burned the twin, and she was scarred for the rest of her life with them. This made her HATE the Liars and Spencer. She has despised them since then.

The BW ending scene in 4x01 (where she had a burnt mask) could’ve hinted towards this:

Of course, she didn’t have that mask when she was there the night Jenna was blinded, but the mask was burnt at the night of the lodge fire. Spencer’s twin was working in two different divisions—the “A” Team and Melissa’s alliance (with Jenna and Shana). They could possibly know the existence of Spencer’s twin too. The twin could’ve set fire to the lodge originally to get revenge on them burning her, partnering with Jenna too as they blinded her in the same accident.

In 4x23 (”Unbridled”), Veronica said to Spencer: “It was as if there were two of you living in this house—the Spencer we recognized and your evil twin. We never knew which one was coming down for breakfast.” Foreshadowing much?

Spencer was drove to madness in Season 3 after Toby supposedly died, and she was admitted into Radley. This could foreshadow her twin especially, and her twin could’ve planned this whole thing to make her end up crazy. 

Sometimes I think some scenes we’ve seen Spencer in isn’t really Spencer. For example, in the ending scene of 7x08 (”Exes and OMGs”) we see Spencer flicking through a family photo album, as if she’s searching for answers. I believe this was her twin in this scene.

I believe that it wasn’t Spencer who Toby kissed in 7x10 (”The DArkest Knight”), it was her twin! She was wearing the same sweater in this scene as she was wearing in 7x08.

“Spencer” was acting quite odd in this scene. May I also note that Spencer wasn’t wearing that sweater later on, because we later see her in a plain white sweater (the one she got shot in).

How could I forget the heart-warming scene between Hanna and Spencer in 7x01 (”Tick-Tock, Bitches”)?

This was NOT a dream! The Liars have always had dreams, such as the many that included Alison, and they always turn out to be reality. Spencer mentioned Uber A’s alias (A.D.) in the dream, yet how could Hanna have dreamt that when they were sent the first text that was signed off saying “- A.D.” after Hanna was kidnapped?

Most importantly, Spencer did not have her bangs in this scene. She has had them since the five-year time jump that started in 6B. People say that she didn’t have her bangs in this scene because Hanna wanted to remember the “clever” Spencer. She’s still as intelligent as ever, so I don’t see why it was necessary for her to not have her bangs in this scene. That’s because it was her twin!

As Jessica always said, “You can never turn your back on a Hastings.” Spencer turned her back and she was SHOT by A.D. 

Jessica knows how dangerous they can be, like Spencer’s twin. What if it was Spencer’s twin who hit Ali that night, and it was Mary who buried her alive? Charlotte could’ve easily covered for her beloved sister.

Melissa is definitely part of Uber A’s game, and so is Mona. I believe Mona is only doing so because she wants to protect the girls (by stopping A.D. doing anything extreme). However, I think she probably left the gAme after Hanna’s kidnapping. She was so distraught over Hanna seemingly being dead.

She knows she can’t tell the Liars everything though—it’ll cost her their friendship, her redeeming, their forgiveness over her being Original A, and quite possibly her life as we all know A.D. is dangerous and doesn’t like to mess around.

As for Melissa, well… bitch doesn’t care. Everything mostly points towards her and she’s one of the most, if not the, shadiest character(s) in the show. She’s always despised Spencer, and she always blames her for her unhappiness. Melissa wants to partner with Spencer’s twin because she knows how much it’ll destroy Spencer.

Melissa likes to lie, and she likes to trick others. Maybe she was protecting Spencer’s twin when she buried Bethany? She knew Spencer would find out about this sooner or later, so she told her she was protecting her and not anybody else. Really, Melissa?

If I recall, Spencer was talking to Toby in 1x20 (“Someone to Watch Over Me”) about running away, and she mentioned that when she was a child, she had a fight with her sister and her parents took her side. Yes, I believe that was Melissa, but Spencer said she ran away after that. What if her twin took her place while she was gone? She said that when she returned, her parents hadn’t even noticed she had gone. Strange much?

When Spencer first “met” Mary in 7x01, they were discussing about twins almost. Mary mentioned how much Spencer and Melissa look a little like twins. Hinting much? Could Mary possibly be Melissa’s surrogate mother too? Perhaps Veronica couldn’t have children at all. This would explain the resemblance between Melissa and Spencer. They look too much alike to not be biological sisters.

In the 7B trailer, we see A.D. slightly taking their hood aback. We can see that their hair color is BROWN/BRUNETTE.

A.D. IS Spencer’s twin. There is so much more to this, and I will most definitely expand on it soon!

Thank you for reading. ^_^

2

that green gentleman (things have changed for me) // panic! at the disco

BETHANY YOUNG AND WREN KINGSTON ARE ENDGAME

Marlene posted this sometime in October when PLL finished production. Notice how it says “safley” instead of “safely”.

Who can’t spell well? WREN!

What I love even more is that it says “By By” instead of “Bye Bye” too…

By = B.Y. = BETHANY YOUNG!

This is it guys. Bethany Young is endgame. She IS Uber A / A.D. and Spencer’s twin, and Wren is her helper… because she looks so much like Spencer!

Wonders of the Spaceways No 1 (Nov 1950) featuring “Convoy to the Unknown” by D. R. Mencet (aka John F. Watt). Cover artist unknown.

Book cover or magazine cover? 1950s British scifi was more often published as a series of paperback books and not as magazines or digests like in the US. Wonders of the Spaceways was published intermittently (no set schedule) from 1950 to 1954.

5

“On the day of the funeral of Diana, Princess of Wales—a sunny Saturday in September 1997—there was one small item that broke a million hearts in a city, and a nation, already awash in grief. A bouquet of white freesias sat atop her coffin as it rode on a gun carriage to Westminster Abbey. Nestled in the flowers was an envelope with a single word“MUMMY”— printed in a child’s hand. Walking behind were its authors, princes William, 15, and Harry, 12, accompanied by their father, Prince Charles, their grandfather, Prince Philip, and their embittered uncle, Charles Spencer, Diana’s brother. At the time, those of us covering the funeral, and millions more watching on London’s streets and on televisions around the world, wondered what these wounded young lads could possibly have said to make sense of the tragedy that befell their mother, and the circus of grief it spawned.”

— Rest in Peace, Princess Diana.  (July 1, 1961 - August 31, 1997) ♡

You Make Me Wanna

Reid x reader

You make me wanna leave the one I’m with
Start a new relationship with you
This is what you do
Think about her and all the things that come along with
You make me
You make me

You’d had that song stuck in your head on repeat for the past six weeks. You knew what had triggered it and you just wanted it to fuck off. Everytime you found yourself humming it, you felt yourself getting more and more confused. It was like the damn song was mocking you.

You’d been singing it at work earning strange looks from Spencer, and you’d been singing it when you were at Chelsea’s apartment, earning curious looks from her.

“Didn’t know you were an Usher fan?” she’d asked you one night, wrapping her arms around your waist as you washed the dishes together.

“He’s okay….” you’d shrugged her off, feigning a headache and that you needed to be at work early the next day and heading off to bed.

You didn’t technically need to be there early, but Spencer was always there at least an hour before everyone else was so you’d started going in at the same time so you could spend longer with him away from the team.

Which was bad.

So bad.

You told yourself that it was just because you didn’t get to spend that much time alone with him now and that you missed your best friend. But you knew you were lying to yourself. And you were lying to Chelsea. And to an extent, you were lying to Spencer as well. Your mornings together were no longer full of the fun and witty banter, they were a tinged with a slight awkwardness. But you still couldn’t stop yourself going in early and everytime you did Spencer was waiting for you with your favourite coffee and pastry ready for you. He couldn’t stop either.

It wasn’t like you were doing anything wrong by spending time together. Not technically.

Shit.

When did this all get so fucking complicated?

Rossi’s annual fourth of July party, that’s when. Chelsea hadn’t been able to make it, she’d been called away on a business trip. So you and Spencer had ridden there together, sharing a cab there and home again.

You’d invited him in for a night cap and you’d lounged on your couch together, your head in his lap. You’d carried on drinking, watching crappy late night movies together and you both fell asleep. When you woke up later, you’d managed to twist positions and you were lying side by side. With just the light from the TV you’d found yourself studying his face, his eyes searching yours. There’d been no words between you, but you suddenly found yourself pressing your body against his, your hand tracing his jaw bone, his own hand lightly skimming up and down your arm causing your hairs to stand on end.

This was your best friend, the person that had introduced you to your girlfriend of eighteen months. She’d been a member of a book club he was part of and Spencer had known that you were bi, it wasn’t a secret.

This was the man you bitched about her to when things got a bit rough, the person you made you laugh so hard that you cried. He was the person you knew you could count on out in the field, who would come and hug you when a case had gotten too hard.

In the three years you and Spencer Reid had known each other, you’d become the best of friends. You’d learned everything about each other and had become each others rocks. You could tell him anything.

Yet that night on your couch there was one thing you couldn’t tell him. And that was that at the particular moment, you’d wanted nothing more than to press your lips to his and to kiss him. From the look he was giving you and the stroking of your arm, it seemed he was having the same thoughts. You’d lain together for what seemed like an age, just looking at each other, your breathing growing heavy as you both waited.

Nothing happened. You didn’t end up banging each other. You didn’t even kiss. But there’d been a connection there deeper than friendship. You’d communicated with each other through the small actions of your bodies that night. His fingers trailing on your arm, you gently caressing his jaw, his eyes closing as you ran your thumb over his stubble.

It was….weirdly intense. But that small moment had changed everything.

Before anything came between us
You were like my best friend
The one I used to run and talk to when me and my
Girl was having problems (that’s right)
You used to say it would be okay
Suggest little nice things I should do
And when I go home at night and lay my head down
All I seem to think about is you
And how you make me wanna

Since that moment, all you could think about was what Spencer would be like as a boyfriend. You weren’t picturing him between your legs or anything like that. Not all the time at least, although there had been one heated night alone in your bed where you may have let your imagination run wild.

You were imagining going home with him and curling up on the couch. Taking him home to meet your friends and family, spending holidays with him. You were imagining him doing everything you and Chelsea would be doing together. And in your imagination, you were happy. So fucking happy.

You weren’t certain of what exactly was going through his head, but you knew him well enough to know that SOMETHING was. His eyes would linger on you for longer and when you’d sit next to each other on the jet or in the meeting room, he’d press his leg against yours or find some reason to touch you.

And then you’d heard that bastard song on the radio one day. And the whole song resonated with you.

You make me wanna leave the one I’m with
Start a new relationship with you
This is what you do
Think about her and all the things that come along with
You make me
You make me

Spencer and you needed to talk about this. And soon. But you didn’t know how to approach the subject, what to even say?

“Hi, I know we’ve been friends for years and currently I’m in a relationship with someone you introduced me to, but I’m fairly certain I love you and I think you might feel the same?”

Nah.

That was not how to do this.

But you had to something. It wasn’t fair on anyone, especially not Chelsea.

Things hadn’t been great recently, even before that moment on the couch. You’d been drifting apart, not spending as much time with her as before. And now, when you were with her you wished you weren’t.

You couldn’t even pin point what was wrong, it just wasn’t the same anymore. But you couldn’t bring yourself to do anything about it. You both kept trying to make it work, because you did still love her. She was a great girl and for the most part, your relationship had been great. She was kind and considerate, funny and loving, and the sex was unbelievable.

Except you hadn’t let her near you since that moment on the couch and that was six weeks ago. You didn’t dare. You couldn’t trust yourself not to close your eyes and to fantasise that it was someone else doing those things to you.

Did he sit at home wondering this same things?

Now what’s bad
Is you’re the one that hooked us up
Knowing it should’ve been you
What’s sad is I love her but I’m falling for you
What should I do
Should I
Tell my baby bye-bye
Should I
Do exactly what I feel inside
‘Cause I
I don’t wanna go
Don’t need to stay
But I really need to get it together

You were minutes away from leaving work for the day and you’d just finished up in the ladies restroom when Emily walked in as you were washing your hands.

“Hey Y/N,” she greeted you.

“Hi Em,” you gave her a smile back. You liked Emily.

She was about to go into the cubicle when she paused, turning to you at the last minute.

“Y/N. I don’t wanna pry but… You know I’m here for you if you ever wanna talk about something right?”

She must have seen your face drop in shock. How did she know?

“You’ve not been yourself lately babe, that’s all. You’ve been quiet and I can see those cogs turning behind those big eyes of yours. Is everything okay at home, is it you and Chelsea?”

Oh god. This was why working with profilers was the absolute worst sometimes. But still. Maybe a fresh perspective could help. And Emily wasn’t one to judge people.

“I don’t know Em, that’s the problem. I just…..oh fuck, it’s all a bunch of shit,” you were struggling to hold it together now and your friend walked towards you and rested her hands on your shoulders, squeezing them lightly.

“Hey… Just breathe okay. You don’t have to tell me, just know that I’m here for you.”

“Em… I… I… think I’m in love with someone else. I haven’t, I haven’t cheated on Chelsea, I swear. But… If the opportunity arose, then I’m not sure I could stop myself again. I love her but… I love him too.”

“Oh honey.” She pulled you in for a hug, smoothing your hair down, “Does this other person know? Do they feel the same?”

“I think so. I can’t be sure because I haven’t actually asked them. I’m scared of the answer.”

“Y/N, I can’t tell you what to do here. But I remember someone saying once that if you fall in love with two people, pick the second one. Because if you truly loved the first person that much, then it wouldn’t have happened. You’re sure it’s love and not obsession or infatuation?”

You nodded, now you’d said those words out loud, you knew it was true. “It’s love, Em.”

“Then you need to have a conversation with Chelsea about this. It’s not fair on her and you’re not being fair to yourself either. Even if this other person doesn’t feel the same, although if my suspicions are right about who it is, then I’m fairly sure they do. But even if they don’t, it’s not fair on either of you for you to stay in a relationship with someone if you have feelings that strong for someone else.”

She released you from her embrace. “Talk to Chelsea. And then talk to Re… him.”

She knew, and the flicker in your eyes as she started to say his name just confirmed it.

“I… I will. I’m just scared to. I don’t wanna hurt her.”

“Y/N. You’re hurting both of you by not doing anything about this. And you’re hurting him to. I’ll be home all night if you need someone to talk to, or to cry on and to feed you wine and ice-cream. Okay?”

“Okay. Thanks Em. I know that you’re right.”

You make me wanna leave the one I’m with (oh baby)
Start a new relationship with you
This is what you do
Think about her and all the things that come along with
You make me
You make me

You’d pulled yourself together and had gone back out into the bullpen, gathering your things ready to go. A shadow fell across your desk and you looked up to see Spencer stood there, his messenger bag over his shoulder.

“Any chance I can get a ride?” he asked softly and you nodded. He didn’t live far out of your way.

The drive to his apartment was silent. The whole way you could hear you both going to start a sentence so many times and then stopping. This was not going to be easy, at all. As you pulled into a parking space outside his building, you took a deep breath. Staring straight ahead and not looking at him, you blurted out.

“What would happen if I wasn’t with her? If we broke up?”

He didn’t speak for the longest time, but he made no move to exit your vehicle.

“I think….I think… It depends on why you broke up,” he said quietly.

“Does that matter?”

“Yes. Because… You might be ending it because you’re just not happy with her. That doesn’t mean anything for m….. I mean, I’d be sad for you and her, but I don’t know what would happen.”

Okay. You could see what he was getting at. He was asking for a reason you’d end it.

You shifted in your seat and turned to look at it.

“What if it ended because I had feelings for someone else. Feelings I don’t want to hide anymore, feelings that have probably been there for a lot longer than I’d care to admit but only came to light recently… Say on the fourth of July.”

Theres was no way you could be anymore obvious here without coming out and saying it. But you didn’t want to, not whilst you were still in a relationship.

“Then I’d… I’d be happy. And… I think that you and this person would be wonderful together. It’s probably all he’s been thinking about for a while now too, but he’s just not wanted to say anything. He was scared of having his feelings rejected and he knew that it would be wrong to say something because you’re with someone else.”

Nicely done Spencer. Refer to yourself as ‘he’ so as to avoid actually saying it.

God this was so fucked up.

“Spence… Are you… Are you in all weekend?”

Because there was a definite chance you’d be turning up at his door.

He nodded. “All weekend. Doesn’t matter what time it is.”

“Okay.”

“Okay….Y/N…?” his brown eyes connected with yours as he opened your car door.

“Be sure she’s not what you want. And be sure that he is…..” He gave you a pained expression as he slid out of the car and shut it, not looking back as he walked into his apartment.

You drove around the streets for an hour after that. You needed to think, come up with a speech. You went back and fourth in your mind, still not sure what to do even though you knew you had to do something.

Emily was right. It wasn’t fair on anyone.

Finally, you found yourself outside Chelseas building, not even remembering driving there. You trudged into her building and up the stairs, not using your key to open her door. It didn’t feel right anymore.

You knocked and she answered a few minutes later, a smile plastered on her face.

“Y/N, hey! Did you forget your key?”

You held up your hand to show her it, already separated and off your key ring. Her face dropped when she saw that, and you felt your heart begin to break.

“Chelsea… Can we talk?”

At this point
The situation’s out of control
I never meant to hurt her but I
Gotta let her go
And if she may not understand it
Why all of this is going on
I tried
I tried to fight it but the feelings just too strong

Three hours later and you were now outside another apartment door.

That had been one of the hardest things you’d ever had to do. Your eyes were red and puffy from crying and your make up was streaked down your face, but here you were.

She’d asked, of course she’d asked. “Is there someone else?”

You couldn’t lie to her, not now. “Yes. But we haven’t done anything, I swear.”

“It’s Spencer, isn’t it. Who would have thought it, the man that introduced us, being the man you leave me for. Guess I’ll be changing book clubs.”

“Chels……”

There’d been shouting, she didn’t believe that nothing at happened. Spencer had apparently been acting off around her the last few times he’d seen her. You couldn’t blame her for not believing her. You weren’t sure you would either if it were the other way around. Finally, you’d left. She’d pack up the things you kept there and leave them at the front desk of your building and could you please do the same.

You’d nodded sadly, hating every minute of this. She looked so…. Broken. And you’d caused that.

But you needed to do it, and when you walked out of the building, you felt like a weight had been lifted.

You hadn’t intended on going straight to Spencer’s either, you’d go home or to Emily’s. But ten minutes later and you were outside his door, waiting for him to answer.

He did, quickly; almost as if he’d been waiting for you. His eyes raked over your face, taking in your tear stained cheeks. He went to open his arms to you and then hesitated.

“It’s done Spencer, me and her are over,” you whispered, watching as he breathed a sigh of relief having the confirmation he needed, and then pulled you to him enveloping you in his arms.

You make me wanna leave the one I’m with
Start a new relationship with you
This is what you do
Think about her and all the things that come along with
You make me
You make me wanna leave the one I’m with
Start a new relationship with you
This is what you do
Think about her and all the things that come along with
You make me
You make me

It was done. You could say it.

“I think I’m in love with you, Spencer.” You murmured into his chest.

“I know that I’m in love with you, Y/N.”

I just realized something: Reid has a grief color. Whenever someone close to him dies, he’s wearing purple.

The wife of the leader of this team who has always welcomed them with a smiling face and open arms? Purple.

His best friend in whom he confides his fears and his desires and who’s usually down to watch all five (5) hours of Solaris in it’s original Russian? Purple.

The love of his life, and the only one who really understands Thomas Martin? Purple.

Boss lady who was lowkey a witch but really did mean well and loved all of her idiotic FBI children? Purple.

Distant, kind-of-a-dick, king of chess? Purple.