specked

I'm taking a break from Tumblr for a bit, everyone.

My girlfriend is considering deactivating, and after seeing Patryk’s post attacking the ENTIRE FANDOM FOR USING THEIR LAST NAMES, something most people didn’t do and my didn’t even know, I’m really fucking depressed. I’m also really stressed with school, I need to focus on that right now, exams start on Thrusday. There’s also all the angry discourse on here right now, I’m tired of seeing so much anger and hate.

I’m really sorry if this inconvenienced or upsets anyone. This will most likely not be permanent, but I really need a break from this hell website.

Have a good evening everyone, I love you all. 💕

~ Skylar

The planet is spinning on time: not a small event. All the galaxies are managing fine; the whole cosmos is doing great. But you have one nasty little thought crawling through your head, and it is a bad day! The problem is you are living in a psychological space that bears no connection with reality. And you are insecure, because it can collapse at any moment. In the vastness and grandeur of cosmic space, if you look at yourself in perspective, you are less than a speck of dust. But you think yourthought—which is less than a speck within you—should determine the nature of existence! You have lost your perspective of life: that is the basic problem.
—  Sadhguru
Quality time [yoon sanha]

Requested

summery: you finally get quality time with your boyfriend

Originally posted by ai-astro


To you, spending a day with sanha (alone) was one of the best things you could imagine.

The breeze of the winter air swooped through your hair and the soft specks of snow landed softly on the top of your head. You and Sanha were decked in army coats and fluffy scarfs, warm gloves and stuffy boots. It was heaven on a cold day like this.

Sanha had talked to you about having a walk thorough the streets of Seoul, and just enjoying time together and you couldn’t say no. All you wanted to go was to spend quality time with him, and you were finally getting it after what felt like years.


“oh, look!” Sanha heard your voice call out, he quickly turned around noticing you looking at a shop that resembled a cabin that would be found it the woods. “They sell coco” you added, turning to him. He already knew what you were going to ask, seeing your eyes get watery.

“lets go” he sighed, taking your arm so you wouldn’t get separated (but really it was just so he could steal your warmth, and the fact he liked holding you but would never admin to it.)

The chatter of the crowds got louder the more you went down the street, mostly because people were trying to steal warmth the shop brought when someone opened the doors. Sanha squeezed through, managing to pull you forward using his tall limbs as an advantage, successfully making his way in he ushered you towards seats near radiators.

The shop was cosy. The walls were a dark brown to contrast with the light floorboards, the tables were circular and all made out of spruce to match with the walls. The walls were decorated with pictures of snow and wildlife, and the windows were beautiful. They had icicles hanging from the top and a soft patch of snow to protect them at the bottom.

“hey! you didn’t make me pay for your stuff for it to go to waste!”

“Sanha stop yelling!”

Currently reading Whitman's Songs of Myself

In all reality, the majority of this doesn’t actually make any fucking sense to me.

But from the bits and pieces I do understand, he does talk about the universe and the concept of the time continuum and how every aspect, every individual speck of the universe is equally important and unimportant in the flow of things and it’s pretty damn cool.

I wish there was a “No Fear” version of this cause I feel like I’d really appreciate a ton of it if I could simply get past the language and vague metaphors.

7

Shmeeps had a little photoshoot tonight. I know they’ll probably both go black eventually but for now, I love his odd eyes. And look how small he is compared to my finger! I wonder if he’ll grow more. He’s apparently sexually mature because he’s building bubble nests, and I’d been eyeing him at the petco for almost a month and he hadn’t gotten noticeably bigger in that time… sooo idk. He’s such a feisty little boy.  

youtube

”The Speck Theory”

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Stateville Correctional Center (SCC) is a maximum security prison for men, located in Crest Hill, Illinois, about 38 miles from Chicago.  SCC was built in 1925 with an original inmate capacity of 1,506 inmates, and expanded over time to accommodate over 4,300. SCC is notable for its “F-house” cell block, which was designed after the panopticon concept. Also referred to as a “roundhouse”, the F-house cell block features four tiers of cells in a circle, with an armed tower in the center. Since the 1990s, F-house has been the only roundhouse cell block in the United States. In December of 2016, the Illinois Department of Corrections announced that F-house would be closed permanently, as part of an effort by Gov. Bruce Rauner to repair the Illinois prison system. Prison watch dog and advocacy groups have called for F-house to be shut down for years, amidst concerns for inmate safety and the long-term effects of the “cage-like, chaotic” nature of the cell block. All sounds were amplified by the high ceilings and cement, creating a “sensory nightmare”, and inmates were not able to determine if they were being watched by the guards in the tower or by other inmates at any time, so had to live as if they were always being watched. The structure will remain standing due to its historical significance, but will never house inmates again.

Notable inmates at Stateville have included:

Richard Speck – In 1966, Speck tortured, raped and murdered eight student nurses from the South Chicago Community hospital. His sentence of death was overturned and he was given eight consecutive life sentences instead. Speck died of a heart attack in 1991.

Nathan Leopold and Richard Loeb – Of the famed Leopold and Loeb, two wealthy University of Chicago students who kidnapped and murdered a 14 year old boy, because they believed their wealth and superiority allowed them to commit “the perfect crime.”

In 1994, serial killer John Wayne Gacy was executed at Stateville.

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It’s Like The ‘Watch The Throne’ Of Tender Punk Poems is a split chapbook, written by myself and Misha Bee Speck. It contains poems both short and long–16 poems by Misha, 12 by me. It is the first official release put out by Bone & Ink Press, my new small press that will be publishing chapbooks of poetry, non-fiction, and experimental genres.

These tender punk poems are about gender and sex, about blood and heat, about dreams and anger and aching. They’re about what it means to live in a body and build a life as the world burns around you.

36 pages, ½ legal. Printed on white paper and staple-bound, then adorned with sparkly cardstock (you can choose gold or silver) and ribbon.

Available for $8 on Etsy.

Something that’s been on my mind a lot lately is how a lot of people fundamentally don’t understand the reality of anti-Semitism. Here’s the thing: aside from Israel, which is a tiny speck of a country, there’s no country in the world where Jews are more than a small fraction of the population. We’re talking less than 1% most places, and a whopping 1.8% in the US.

It would be one thing if no one bothered us, but Jews have been discriminated against, oppressed, and murdered consistently for millennia all over the world. There’s this idea that Jews control the world, but first of all, that’s an anti-Semitic trope that you should be very wary of believing, and second of all, if there are Jews in powerful positions, it’s probably in large part because we’ve had to grab as much power as we can to protect ourselves. Even then, many times throughout history, it wasn’t enough, and we couldn’t count on the people around us to help. 6 million Jews were murdered while much of the world stood by, and that was far from the first time people hadn’t cared enough to help.

That’s why it makes me feel so sad and isolated when anti-Semitism is left out of the causes by people claiming to fight for marginalized groups, as it was at the march I went to yesterday and very often is. It feels like we’re on our own again, and do you understand how few of us there are? We can’t save ourselves alone, and it’s absolutely getting worse in many parts of the world.

This is an issue in itself, but it also connects to how people see Israel without taking into account what it means to many Jews. Israel as a state literally exists because the world felt bad about letting the Holocaust happen. Many people, including my grandparents, moved there because their neighbors in other countries had turned their backs or even helped in the murder of their families and friends. My mom visited Israel recently and she said she heard so much more French than she used to there. That’s because the increased anti-Semitism in France has caused a lot of Jews to no longer feel safe there, and so they moved to the only place where they could escape that. A lot of Jews would be perfectly content living in other countries if they didn’t face so much anti-Semitism there.

That’s what it comes down to, that Israel is the only place in the world where Jews are not a tiny minority that faces at best unconscious prejudice and at worst outright violence from other citizens. But even then, it’s a place where there is a danger of violence, and much of the Arab world wants to wipe Israel off the map entirely. Think about how that feels, knowing that a lot of people think the only place where you can completely belong shouldn’t even exist.

I think a lot of Americans have strong opinions of Israel without knowing anything about the history or current reality of the region, which is a whole separate rant, but what I think the colonialist view that a lot of people have misses most is that this isn’t a case where a colonizing power can withdraw back to their home country. This is a case of people who have no other home country, or whose home countries have made them feel that they don’t have a place there, or who have been kicked out of so many countries they no longer have a home. This is a very important and very overlooked point to understand.

I also think that a lot of criticism of Israel is rooted in anti-Semitism that people don’t even realize they’re playing into, like the Jews rule the world trope or the downplaying of how the hatred of other Middle Eastern countries for Israel a) influences the situation & b) is based on hatred of Jews, and it’s frustrating that people don’t see that. As you yell about privilege, make sure you realize your own in being able to not see subtle (or sometimes really not subtle) currents of anti-Semitism in the way people talk about the world. That doesn’t mean there’s no valid criticism, but criticism that doesn’t take into account the complicated reality of the situation is counterproductive because it just makes Israel feel more attacked. (I’m looking at you, UN.)

I have a lot more to say, but I’m running out of steam, so in summary:

1. Please remember Jews when you talk about fighting oppression, because we not only don’t rule the world, but we’ve been fucked over by it too many times to count and there aren’t enough of us to fight anti-Semitism on our own.

2. Check your privilege and really think about what it’s like to be a religious/ethnic minority that’s a tiny, tiny fraction of the world’s population and yet disproportionately hated.

3. Acknowledge the role of anti-Semitism in both how the world views Israel and how Israelis and many Jews feel about the country, because they really can’t be separated.

(Written by my sister and posted here with her permission.)