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March 20th: Dancing and the Idiocy of Age

“putting stuff on your head is fun. fun is good for you! […] if you find yourself getting older and less silly, do something about it.”

in september 2009 i got into the vlogbrothers, and i decided to watch all their videos from the beginning, which was one of the most important decisions of my life. i was platonically falling in love with these guys right from the start of brotherhood 2.0, but it was right here, march 20th, that sticks out

because if i wanted to explain to you why the green bros matter, i’d probably show you this video. it’s edited weirdly (it’s v youtube 07, y'know) and hank is a BABY and the first minute is mostly hank dancing to the theme tune of the US office. i doubt anyone who doesn’t know is going to watch this, but context: a few days previously hank had, as part of a challenge, had to give out peeps on the street. most people ignored him, but these punk guys took some, and kurt the punk rock nerdfighter set the Eating Peeps World Record and is a true hero. and hank talks abt that here, and talks about little kids putting stuff on their heads, and about the value of silliness and fun.

i remember hank saying once that the two most important things are making the world a better place and having fun. and i believe that, i believe that so so much, and ultimately it was him and john who taught me that lesson. i was fifteen, and a part of me wanted to be a grown up and a part of me was scared shitless, and hank told me a couple of things:

  • don’t let people look down on you because you’re young, your voice is valuable and important
  • silliness is its own virtue, and a v brave and important thing to be
  • that growing older doesn’t mean having to grow up
  • that growing older definitely doesn’t mean having to give up being silly and being open to silliness and fun

because we should be open to weirdness and difference and fun. because the things the world told me i should be ashamed of, the parts i buried deep down, hank and john told me they were the most wonderful parts about me. they exposed them to the light and told me to be proud. and god, i’m sure to outsiders the “made of awesome” stuff must seem obnoxious as hell, but i was so so sad and scared and alone and i was eating lunch in a toilet cubicle but i could come home and have these two guys tell me i was worthwhile, i mattered, i was better than okay. all the things i love most about myself are things john and hank taught me, and i am so glad they exist.

remember when hank was in college and he wrote baby i sold your dog on ebay and sent it to blink b/c i think about that All The Time and it makes me super emotional ok

b/c hank is my everything and i love blink so much but mostly it’s just. hank sitting in his dorm writing this song and thinking “this is cool and funny but i’m never going to be like, in a band” and thinking maybe blink would like it and then “this song i wrote could be a cool funny song by a real band!” which is so ridiculous and cute and both hopeful and sad but but but hank!!!!!!!!! is a fucking rockstar!!!!!! hank’s released albums hank has a //band// (also when he started recording w/ the band and was like “…i hope you guys like pop punk” don’t look @ me) the dreams hank thought were too crazy to dream came true and

his favourite band are they might be giants and i think about that a lot