space emperor

Another Humans are Weird post

So, I’ve seen all of the stuff about aliens being confused by smiling and laughing, and that’s cool, but… what about when it’s just… not used to denote happiness? Just bear with me here.


Just when Xealten thought xe had humans figured out…

Laughter was for happiness, as was smiling, but the deep, low chuckle coming from Human-Selena’s mouth was sending every survival instinct in xir body on high alert. The invaders looked thrown off, too. It was predatory, almost, primal and scary beyond all reason. Which is why none of them reacted fast enough to avoid the heavy pipe in Human-Selena’s hands.

She looked down at their unconscious forms, the pipe swinging loosely from her fist. “Guess they didn’t read the human guide, huh?” She turned back towards Xealten, muttering something that sounded like “Weakest ones, my foot,” though judging from the illogic of the statement, xe supposed xe could have misheard.

Human-Selena smiled at Xealten, a hint of that predatory smile still lingering, but faint enough it probably wasn’t directed at xim.

“Let’s go find where the rest of these bastards got to, shall we?”

Xealten followed, making a mental note to update the guide when this was all over.

Space Mall (Voltron Legendary Defender) Paperback – December 12, 2017 

Kindle: $5.99
Paperback: $6.99
Hardcover: $17.99 

What’s the only thing scarier than Emperor Zarkon? Space Mall Cop Varkon, and he has it out for the Paladins of Voltron in this collectible chapter book retelling of the hottest new Netflix series, Voltron Legendary Defender from DreamWorks Animation!

Welcome to the Space Mall, the universe’s last resort against fair-priced goods. Here, you can purchase a whole set of Teludav lenses, all for the low, low price of your first-born child—or being the shopkeeper’s butler for one year. While Shiro works on forming a stronger bond with the Black Lion, the other Paladins navigate the galactic Space Mall, and try to avoid getting caught by Varkon (and his trusty hoverbike) in the process!

This paperback edition includes exclusive Voltron decal stickers, and a new, never-before-told story from the Space Mall!

Keep reading

i will help you swallow your hesitation. you’ll trust me. (x)

Long ago, before Haggar was, well, evil, she was a scientist. Driven by the phenomenons of the world, she was determined to uncover their secrets. Then the revolution started, the beginning of the empire, the new age. She was happy to be left alone to her research, going unnoticed by the new, developing world. And then he started whispering in her ear.

“We’ve heard of your research; you seek answers to mysterious and powerful things.” Of course she did; she was a scientist.

“You know that the Paladins will never let you continue your research. Not once they’ve realized how dangerous those secrets can be.” She supposed that was true. However, the Paladins were reasonable, and anything she discovered would be put to benevolent use.

“You will be imprisoned. Look what they’re doing to me.” Well… Zarkon had a point. “Swallow your hesitation. Trust me.” And so she did.