space advocates

Exclusionists are prescriptivists not descriptivists; and that matters

I just came from a conference for LGBTQ+ folks and there was widespread support for aro/ace people. There were entire panels centered around being ace/aro. There were ace/aro flags being sold alongside other LGBTQ+ flags. The language used was inclusive to a spec folks. In the panel on lateral oppression, there was no mention of exclusionist or TERF ideologies (rightfully so). Panelists who were specifically invited to speak spoke freely about them being a spec or about how great they thought the split attraction model was.

If you’re a spec and reading this, just know the exclusionists are not the majority in LGBTQ+ spaces. This is the space that actually exists, not the exclusionary space they misguidedly advocate for.


anonymous asked:

Hi! I'm a nt singlet trying to learn about neurodivergence (and systems) so I can be a better ally. If you don't mind me asking, what do you think I should know about bpd (and anything else you have, because a lot of people seem to have multiple diagnoses)? Like the basics of what it is, how I can be an ally, and how I can be a good friend if I meet a borderline irl? I hope this wasn't invasive or rude, also feel free to correct my terminology because I'm really new to all this ❤

do my eyes deceive me??? a nice neurotypical in my ask box??? of course i will help u….(besides im bored and have nothing better to do)

firstly, being in a system is neurodivergent. you sort of separated the two, idk if u meant to do that.

i think u what should know is that borderlines are people too. people love to condemn us and say we’re manipulative, abusive. in reality, a lot of borderlines have high empathy for others (to the point where it hurts us if we see someone else in pain). we’re not bad people by default.

even doctors and psychiatrists call us abusive and manipulative. the belief actually comes from them. back when bpd was first coined as a disorder, it was seen as “the borderline between psychosis and non-psychosis” hence the name borderline. doctors back then couldn’t understand why borderlines kept ending up back at hospitals treatment after treatment, how we were so driven by emotion, why regular therapy would not work. they concluded that borderlines were manipulative, sought attention, and were on the borderline of psychosis and non-psychosis, deeming us “hard to deal with.”

ive heard so many stories about borderlines being treated extremely negatively back then, to the point where doctors and psychiatrists would give up on their cases, tell them they were unfixable and manipulative. if they wanted help, they wouldve worked for it by now.

thing is, borderlines don’t respond to cbt/talk therapy. psychiatrists failed to see that we weren’t failing on purpose. their treatment was not up to par. from the cbt i’ve worked with, ive noticed that cbt assumes one has a stable identity and is always aware of themselves. borderlines are not.

dbt was created by marsha linehan. dialectical behavior therapy was made specifically for borderlines. it combines elements of cbt, behavioral science, and zen buddhism. and serious…this stuff is amazing. it works. dbt is split up into four modules: mindfulness, interpersonal effectiveness, distress tolerance, and emotional regulation.

mindfulness is the teaching of always constantly checking if youre in the present. it is by far the hardest module to master, but it’s extremely rewarding once you understand it.

interpersonal effectiveness is on interpersonal relationships. y’know, because abandonment.

distress tolerance teaches you what to do in a crisis. and it isn’t cbt crap docs hand you and expect you to master in a day. whereas cbt tells you “just breathe, count to ten” when you’re distressed, distress tolerance teaches you three steps: distract, relax, and cope. distract yourself from the situation, relax using your five senses, and cope with the situation by weighing the pros and cons. i use this nearly everyday.

emotional regulation teaches you to do the opposite of what your negative emotions tell you. it teaches you that you are more than your emotions. while you may not be able to control them, you can certainly stop the snowball effect of emotions that trigger thoughts, which then trigger more complex emotions, and more complex thoughts, and so forth.

being a good borderline ally is simple: dont spread needless hate about our disorder, don’t infiltrate our spaces, and advocate for fair treatment.

if you meet a borderline in real life and you are even just a smidgen nice to them, congratulations: that borderline is your new friend. also in retrospect, don’t be mean to them. they will hate you very much.

if you ever become the fp of a borderline, always try to be there for them when they need you. encourage them to talk to you about their emotions. some borderlines are quiet and won’t talk about their negative emotions, even if it hurts.

also, they are constantly afraid of you abandoning them, it is a constant fear. reassure them as often as you can that you do not have plans to. also, don’t ever tell them they’re a handful, or “a lot,” even in a joking manner. they most likely have heard so many borderlines like them being called “abusive” and will wonder if “they are too,” because of their emotions.

well, that’s what i have to say. i might do another thing like this on systems. maybe. depends.

fun fact: white privilege is real and white people need to start acknowledging it. If you’re a white person who advocates for racial equality without acknowledging your privilege, you become part of the problem, because you can’t end a bigoted system if you don’t say that it’s real. I’m white. And I know that it gives me privilege. But I also know that it is important to use one’s privilege to advocate and educate. It deeply hurts me that I have this privilege, one that I know is bigoted and should not exist, and that while it exists I will be given more opportunities than my POC friends. But that gives me motivation to fight against an bigoted and hateful system. Acknowledging your privilege is one of the first steps to eradicating it. Also, if you are a white person who is at a protest or involved in a group that is against racial inequality, accept that you are in a place where you need to step back and listen. If you are in a space that advocates for POC, you need to let actual POC share their experiences and understand that this is not a platform for you. (This goes for men who are feminists, and for cishet allies as well. )

Help Bill Nye get his documentary made!


Bill Nye, for those of you outside of America, is a mechanical engineer and the host of the most scientifically prolific show in the 90′s, “Bill Nye the Science Guy.” It’s silly, quirky, super weird, and completely scientifically focused. It was a staple for any middle school science classroom, and it shaped the lives of millions of children across the USA.

The coolest part? Bill Nye is an internationally acclaimed advocate fighting for scientific literacy, gender equality in male-dominated scientific fields such as coding and engineering, and a vehement supporter of combating global climate change… And we want to record his historic role in scientific literacy and advocation with a super cool documentary! This documentary aims to “start following Bill as he tours the globe, advocates for space policy in Washington DC, launches a satellite, hangs out with Neil deGrasse Tyson, debates climate change deniers, and attempts to fill the big shoes of his former mentor and friend Carl Sagan – all at a time when science is under attack.”


The Kickstarter only has 10 days to go and it’s scarcely past 50% funding. We need your help! AND YOU GET SOME HELLA COOL PRIZES!

So please, please, PLEASE spread awareness of this! This man mentored under Carl Sagan, debated one of the most (deluded) popular anti-evolutionists, and travels the globe ALL THE TIME to raise awareness of the struggle a scientifically illiterate world can cause. Donate what you can, and if you can’t spare the monies, please reblog! Let’s make this happen!

i CAN believe y’all made me write this

Hi everyone.  I decided to make a more detailed amendment to an earlier meta post I made because there were some deep flaws in what I wrote and I don’t feel that it succeeded in communicating what I originally intended.

I wanted to start off by saying I’m deeply sorry for one of its core failings.  I failed to consider the emotional investiture of those who identify with fictional narratives.  I used my personal viewpoint on fictional narratives and created a post that assumed it was ideal and was feasible or even desirable. Further segregation of fanworks does not ensure that they are only consumed by intended audiences, and puts a huge onus on anyone to develop a certain level of media literacy in order to just participate in fandom space.  By advocating only one kind of media critical approach to fanwork, I alienated many people and in many cases, revictimized people by using the ideology of their oppressors.  I further contributed to a dismissive environment that refused to acknowledge a growing push for change.

While I do think that media literacy is becoming an increasingly essential skill, and I do think the good representation vs bad representation argument is too frequently simplified to an idealized portrayal vs anything else argument; my original meta assumed these were foundational absolutes and were not presented in a way that invited discussion but instead were paternalistic.

It’s really very ironic because my original intent was to argue that the way and means of arguing against mlm fetishization have been paternalistic and not sufficiently intersectional.  Many people have interpreted my post to say that criticism isn’t allowed and I don’t entirely blame them because the post ended up becoming an argument from tradition and concluding that slash tropes are inviolable by the virtue of the slash fandom’s history in being an outlet that women could transform their own experiences of misogyny into fantasy.  I literally just restated the argument of the current fandom status quo. 

I never actually wrote down my real concern, which was that a large amount of the current slash fandom still only approaches fictional mlm through the lens of slash conventions. For them, slash is a vice.  They may have completely progressive and fulfilling relationships with mlm in their real lives but slash is equivalent to porn for them.  The issue with dealing with a vice is that such products don’t follow conventional psychological, social, or economic models.  One of the few universal tactics against vice is stigmatizing that behavior. I’m kind of uncomfortable with that implication.  None of the arguments or meta I had come across offered solutions for those who now cannot engage in sexualized fantasy without social consequences.  All you then do is move the problem underground.

I was considering going through my original post line-by-line but I’m sure you’re exhausted enough.  Ultimately I share the same goal as many of you and that’s an increasing awareness and production of works that take mlm’s lived experiences into account.  I was overly reactionary in my initial foray into this discussion but, like for you, it’s an important topic for me.

Thank you.

Jupiter Ascending is...

Warning for minor spoilers (sorta) (kinda)

- Channing Tatum fights flying alien lizards while wearing eyeliner and anti-gravity space roller blades because he fell in love with the reincarnation of a space queen who owns the planet earth, whom he tracked down by sniffing her signature because he’s also a part wolf soldier who just wants his pack and wings back.
- The architecture and design in this film is incredible; the characters all have so much depth, even if they’re minor characters, it’s so much to pack into two hours! (It’s too much to pack into two hours, I want a 3-movie remake immediately)
- Seriously I think they cared more about how this movie looked than the plot on occasion, it’s beautiful to look at
- There’s a space DMV. With Intergalactic Advocate Bob.
- If you thought Twilight had a lot unnecessary shirtless-ness I invite you to watch a particular 30-miute segment about a third of the way in and re-evaluate your ideas of “a lot” and “unnecessary.”
- The sci-fi trope of a women as a decorative plot device is kinda reversed because I’m pretty sure pretty male protag Channing Tatum is basically just there to catch Jupiter whenever she falls (literally)
- I adore the fact that Jupiter uses a pad in first aid and all the men always give Jupiter this look when they realize what it is but can never bring themselves to actually say anything
- I didn’t know I needed this movie until I saw it and let me tell you I have NEVER paid full price to own a movie and I’m probably going to buy this as soon as it comes out, hopefully in some kind of extended-cut special edition.
- One of villains tries so hard to be as deep and troubled as Tom Hiddleston’s Loki and just can’t seem to pull it off quite as well but he still basically just comes off as a creepy mass murderer (he is) who looks like he’s in serious need of a good night’s sleep and chapstick (desperately) and who’s voice sounds like he gargled nails
- The big tough soldier boys are angsty babies cause they lost their wings and they solve it by punching each other out in a field of bees that are bowing to a space queen while being mocked by a teenage girl for their “Male mating rituals”
- You meet the pilot of the Aegis and I want a whole TV show about her and her crew to be the next generations space phenomenon that will rival of Star Trek
- The costumes, oh my sequins, the glorious costumes!
- We now know what happened to the dinosaurs
- This movie has serious drinking game potential, including “drink every time a male antagonist is dressed better than the girls at your high school prom”
- This movie is completely unapologetic in all of its glory and faults
- If you think I’ve spoiled the movie you are so very wrong because there is so much more packed into this movie. They tried to cram a Harry Potter Universe’s worth of backstory and plot into a 2 hour movie and it’s GREAT
- Basically the Wachowski’s were given a ton of money to do whatever the hell they wanted and they did just that
- Holy royalty-sensing honey bees it was great

anonymous asked:

do you think it's possible to care about trans people/be pro-trans and be a radical feminist? like i advocate for womyn's-only spaces but also advocate for gender-neutral bathrooms and spaces. i want trans people to be able to lead safe lives. is that anti-trans/anti-rad fem in anyway?

It’s not anti radical feminist to believe they should lead safe lives. I don’t think you’ll find a radical feminist that disagrees with that. We’re not these boogeyman that advocate for the eradication of trans people…we are just against gender and believe in sex based oppression which doesnt go over well with people that worship gender and deny sex based oppression. I agree there should be both women only spaces and gender neutral spaces. I also don’t think you’ll find any radical feminist that disagrees with that. However there’s a certain extent that we can support them until it becomes oppositional to radical feminist beliefs and what we believe is best for women. For example, trans ideology. That’s fundamentally anti-women. Same with most mainstream trans activism and trans activists. There is so much misogyny and male entitlement to women’s spaces, women’s labor, women’s bodies (literally, referring to the cotton ceiling). The way I see it is that there shouldnt be any discrimination against trans people, they certainly shouldnt be oppressed in any capacity and they should have housing, jobs, shelters, safe spaces, etc. but it can’t undo women’s legal rights/protections (which much of it does due to gender identity being written into law), women’s ability to name (like our ability to talk about sex based oppression, gender socialization, male privilege, etc), women’s spaces, etc. Much of what radfems believe in is actually beneficial to trans people bc we’re anti gender, something that’s told them they’re wrong their entire lives. I think the majority of trans people are a vulnerable group and that the loudest voices are the gender conforming autogynephile heterosexual male ‘trans lesbians’ which pose the biggest threat to women. When you consider that lots of trans people are dysphoric women (dysphoria being very often a product of trauma within in a patriarchal society), lesbian women, gay men, etc that are forced into transition by the current narrative and a homophobic gender essentialist society, I think that radical feminism is very beneficial in the sense that it seeks to destroy all those things and gives us the tools to analyze where it all comes from.


“sneckdown” ( combination of “snow” and “neckdown” - another name for a curb expansion) uses snow formations on the street to reveal the space cars don’t use. Advocates can then use these sneckdown photos to make the case to local transportation officials that traffic calming interventions like curb bumpouts and traffic islands can be installed without any loss to car drivers. 

From What Snow Tells Us about Creating Better Public Spaces on E. Passyunk Avenue


On March 7, 2012, Neil deGrasse Tyson submitted a testimony to lawmakers in Washington during a hearing entitled “Priorities, Plans, and Progress of the Nation’s Space Program." 

It was a compelling testimony on the past, present, and future of NASA, embodying a message which spoke for generations who’ve come and gone, and generations still to come. However meaningful and passionate Dr. Tyson’s words were (and still are), his voice was only communicated to lawmakers who already support a more robustly funded space program in America, while the politicians who needed to hear Tyson’s testimony didn’t even bother to show up.

Dr. Tyson’s words also were not broadcast for all to see. A local C-SPAN network was on hand, fortunately, to record this video, which then, was uploaded by someone on YouTube, where it went viral, acquiring millions of views spread across other users who’ve passed it along. 

During a week where we remember and honor true heroes who put their lives at risk for the greater ambitions and good of humanity demonstrated by the Apollo 1 fire - upon which we have greatly advanced and evolved in our understanding of astronaut/vehicle safety - and the fateful Space Shuttle Challenger disaster - which lifted the veil of ignorance and mismanagement that claimed the lives of astronauts and the first non-astronaut in space - dedicate 25 minutes to watching and listening intently on the words and articulation of Neil deGrasse Tyson’s advocation for space exploration.

If we depend solely on scientifically illiterate, election-cycle-driven legislators in Congress to decide for themselves how NASA should or should not be utilized, we risk enduring another 46 years of stagnation in space while other countries pass us by regarding education, innovation, employment, and human achievement. 

However, if we, as a collective democracy, decide to fight for something that will benefit us now, tomorrow, and beyond our own lifetimes, we provide meaning in our own lives. If we educate the public, we create a more informed society aware of the dangers we face through inaction and conservative thinking. We can reach Congress and educate the public globally with this film. 

Support this Kickstarter and help us achieve our $80K goal before February 1. Together, we can stake a claim toward our future, the American space program our taxes support, and endorse the #FightforSpace.

Here’s How We Can Bring People Together on the Abortion Debate

By focusing on “red states” and regional culture, Take Root has managed to create a space to talk divisive issues without the typical divisiveness. By expanding the conversation from just abortion to reproductive justice, they are able to create a space where advocates from several different fields can work together, rather than treating justice as a zero sum game. They explain their focus on reproductive justice as “the right to have children, not to have children, and to parent the children we have in safe and healthy environments.” This allows participants to “see the connections between poverty and food access in rural and urban environments, histories of coercive sterilization of women of color, the disparity in impacts of criminalization of drugs and its effects on families, gender self-determination and gender violence, and access to contraception, transition services, sexual health and consent information.” They even had sessions on climate change!

When I recently suggested that men hold themselves accountable for how many women and men feel fear in the presence of a stranger who is a man, I was told that wasn’t equality. Women need to learn to speak up for themselves … in bars, dark alleys and vacant parking lots. Some men argued that was the end game of equality: Women are now on their own — just like they wanted to be! (You’ll sense a punitive tone in some of the statements these men will make about women seeking equality. “They got what they wanted” is a common catchall response.)

I didn’t ask men to become drones serving a constantly rotating queen bee based on whichever woman happens to be standing closest to them. But that’s what some men heard: a call to subservience and submission. Not at all. What’s clear from listening to women (and men) is that a few corrective measures would help people feel safer in public spaces. Advocating for this got me a whole goodie bag of keepsakes, like emails telling me to castrate myself. Yes, I can see how that’s a totally rational response to suggesting we care about the people around us. “You should consider women and their sense of safety in a public space.” “Oh yeah, bro, and you should take a knife to your sack.”