No-no, lance with a fake mermaid tail that he wears in the water and entertaining kids. A hose that constantly provides air so he can stay underwater for long periods of time. Swimming with peaceful fish in a large tank.
Okay I absolutely LOVE THIS so give me an entire Voltron aquarium AU
Voltron Aquarium was owned by Alfor, but he retired and his best friend Coran took over
His daughter Allura wanted to take over because she studies zoology but she’s still young and in school and Alfor wants her to graduate ,so Coran takes over so he knows his staff will still be taken care of
Allura still plays a huge part, she’s one of their best animal handlers and she teaches a lot of programs for local schools
Shiro is their primary physician for the animals, so he and Allura usually work together a lot to see if problems are medical or behavioral and just generally make sure the animals are happy and healthy
Hunk works there too, as a sort of grounds keeper and technician to make sure the outdoor displays look nice, the exhibits have proper lighting and temperatures and space and nothing is broken
And during the summer they offer boat tours! They have a boat they keep at a local marina and Hunk drives the boat while Allura teaches programs
Pidge can’t work there because she’s still in high school, but she volunteers there every weekend bc she’s a huge nerd
Sometimes she helps Allura teach programs and she knows all the animals and could babble about their ecosystems for hours
Keith is a marine biology and environmental science student at the local college and is there basically all the time because he has a membership that gets him free admission
Shiro is his best friend from childhood and they both grew up on the beach and developed a love for aquatic life so they both study it
So Keith goes there to hang out with Shiro, lend a hand when it’s needed bc he knows the whole staff and aquarium pretty well, but mostly he just hangs out by his favorite exhibits while doing homework
A local extremist “animal rights” group and publication called GALRA holds protests outside the aquarium saying that holding animals in captivity is wrong
The staff is annoyed and Pidge fights them a lot bc they work with a lot of conservation groups to create animal welfare programs and protect water rights, and their animals are all well taken care of with appropriate exhibits
Nevertheless GALRA is loud and public, and so they notice they’ve been losing money, especially on the days when the protestors are there
So they need a big new idea that can bring people in, but it has to be something they can be public about without GALRA condemning them and making things even worse
Hunk is the one who suggests it, he knows his neighbor is obsessed with ocean life and is a professional mermaid
It’s perfect because the aquarium needs a non-animal based exhibit and Lance has been struggling to make ends meet
He works during the day as a fitness instructor, and he’s studying at the community college nearby, but the mermaid thing is mostly just a hobby that he and his partner Plaxum do every once in a while
He and Plaxum get hired as a mermaid duo to perform shows fairly regularly
Keith shows up one day and notices it’s really crowded and is like ???? because he doesn’t know of any new exhibits or anything
So he goes exploring and sees one of the pools is occupied by two people
He looks around and there’s no staff around, are these people trespassing? So he goes over and starts telling Lance that guests can’t just jump into the pool, and there’s a crowd gathering so he needs to get out before he gets in huge trouble
Lance just looks all confused, then laughs and is like “Come back in 20 minutes”
So Keith gets all annoyed and leaves but he can’t help it, he’s curious, so he comes back later to see that these people are still in the pool, only now he notices they have mermaid tails and are putting on a whole show
And look, Lance may have just been doing this mostly as a hobby, but dang if he isn’t good at it
Turns out Lance is studying ecology and biology and like wow, he knows what he’s talking about
He and Plaxum look so graceful performing these shows, and he is really good at charming the audience and putting on a very convincing act while also teaching kids about marine ecology
At first Keith thinks it’s silly but I mean, Lance is very attractive and the mermaid costume is doing wonders for him
And Lance has his whole mermaid act, so he is very sassy and fun and teases Keith when he gets caught staring at them and pretending not to be invested
But like he’s clearly there with Plaxum and so he kinda just observes from afar
Except he’s there late one day, and sees Lance leaving after a show, and Keith realizes this is his first time seeing Lance with clothes, and his hair is dry and kinda curly from the water, and he looks tired but so so cute
So Keith is like whoaaa okay run away but nope, Lance sees him and starts up a conversation
And it turns out the mermaid persona is like, exactly that, a persona? And Lance is actually very sweet and soft-spoken and nice and wow Keith is done for
Keith just so happens to start hanging around the aquarium during every show, and Lance is an oblivious idiot who thinks he’s there to watch Plaxum and be a fish nerd
Cue some good old fashioned mutual pining
Until one day, Keith is hanging around waiting for Shiro to clock out and notices Hunk talking to Lance
So Keith starts to walk over and Lance doesn’t notice and Keith overhears him talking about how cute some guy is and how he’s there all the time but he only ran into him the one time and he can’t be flirting while doing a show
Keith is all :( because Lance likes someone else
And Lance still doesn’t notice him and is like “I don’t even know his name! I just call him cute mullet boy with the red jacket in my head” and like
Cue Hunk looking behind Lance to Keith, with his mullet and his red jacket and a freaking lightbulb goes off
So Hunk is like “His name is Keith” and Lance is like ?!?!?! you know him?! Can you introduce me?
So Hunk is like ummmm introduce yourself
And Lance turns around and realizes Keith has been eavesdropping and wow they are both very gay
So they start dating and they’re the ocean’s greatest power couple
Anyways Lance’s exhibit does wonderfully and GALRA can’t fight them on it and the protestors stop showing up so business is doing really well
And it’s happy and gay and mermaids bring everyone together!
Can we just discuss this? This was when she saw Rhea on her phone talking to Kara, and when she asked, Rhea blatantly lied to her face. Lena KNOWS she’s lying (and TBH, she always knew in the back of her mind that Rhea is shady), but she chooses to ignore it. She struggles, but she still turns away and continues to work. She wants SO BADLY to believe that someone (besides Kara) is truly good, and truly believes in her. She turns away, knowing better, because despite everything, Lena Luthor has a hopeful optimism that trumps her rationality simply because her heart is desperate for love.
This also ties into the headcanon that Lena knows Kara is Supergirl, but is in a bit of denial about it, simply because she wants to believe her life can be normal, for one second. For one second, she can have a friend who doesn’t have any ulterior motives, and doesn’t have a past that is tangled with her last name. Kara is her safe place, a place to go to hide from the reality of her life, and admitting she’s Supergirl adds layers of complications that I don’t think she’s ready to face. Lena Luthor is smarter than everyone, but she chooses to overlook certain things, almost as a reflex, to protect her heart.
So here is a langsty idea: Lance finally breaking down but at something small
Lance sits, cross-legged opposite of Blue. He was holding a paintbrush dipped in polish to her claws.
He diy’ed some polish and made it to be highly resistant to damage. Swords? Lasers? Bullets? Not a crack in sight. It was tougher than nails.
“If only it could help with my self esteem right, Blue?” She raises a mental eyebrow, unimpressed by the joke. He chuckles.
“A few more strokes…”
“…and…we are… done.”
Lance leans back grinning as he admires his work. Nicely done. Sky blue was definitely her colour. Blue thrums in agreement.
Lance had waltzed into her hangar a few hours ago declaring that it was spa day. He had spent it repairing, cleaning, and buffing out the dents in Blue.
This wasn’t a rare occurrence. They would usually do this every once a week or after a mission that leaves her badly wrecked.
He does it with joy. He does it remembering the days on Earth cleaning the heck out of his house with his family.
But today he was doing it as a distraction.
“You are sad.”
A loud metal clang echoes throughout the room. Lance winces.
He was so caught off guard by the blunt statement that he dropped the metal lid used cover the container full of paint.
The floor was blue.
‘Why can’t you do anything right?’
“Fuck,” He cursed under his breath. Everything building up from the past week spilled over at the minor inconvenience.
“Fuck,” A tear threatened to fall, prickling at the corner of his eye. This wasn’t suppose to be a big deal. This wasn’t suppose to set him off. The lid rolled away from his grasp as he tried to pick it up.
‘You should be more like Keith.”
“FUCK,” He gave up chasing the lid, choosing to slam his leg into the metal can and it flew into the air and across the room.
He could almost catch a glimpse of the bright sky back on Earth. It fell back down, wet against his face like rain.
The paint stung.
Every breathy gasp held frustration. He repeats the word over and over until the it was strange on his lips. He basked in the bittersweet relief it gave him.
“Lance,” something in Blue`s voice grounded him,
A soothing hum reaches out, washing over him through the bond.
His pulse evens out
Lance paused for a good few ticks before proceeding to lie flat on his back on the floor. The only thing that reached his ears were the ocean waves hitting against rocks through their bond. He stayed like that for awhile; staring puffy eyed at the white ceiling.
I am So Done with these criticisms I keep seeing like “It was good and all but Diego Luna didn’t work for me casting-wise, he was too wiry and soft-spoken, not action-movie enough” and I’m like??? SPY???? That’s the point????
Honestly people need to stop forcing the Hypermasculine Jason Statham Aesthetic bullshit irrelevantly onto characters that bear literally no comparison.