sorry this could have been so much better

3

“This might finally be the episode where someone actually dies.”

So @roysyesterdayjam mentioned something on Twitter about a fictional universe where animated characters were the On the Spot guests and I…got an idea….

Anyway, an RT-animated villains episode of On the Spot, anyone? Maybe it takes place in some sort of Roger Rabbit-esque universe, which is totally why I didn’t do anything to Jon’s screencap except slap some dialogue on it (that’s totally the reason and not because I blew my load on attempting to draw four different animation styles shhhhhhh)

Daddies Get Insecure Too
  • Daddy: Hey baby? I'm sorry I haven't been the best lately.
  • Baby: Whaddya mean daddy?
  • Daddy: I haven't really been there for you. I know you've needed me and you've been really upset with me. I'm not doing good and I wish I could do better for you. You deserve so much better.
  • Baby: ...
  • Daddy: You're probably mad at me and you have every right to be. I want to be the best I can be for you and I'm failing at being your daddy.
  • Baby: ...
  • Daddy: Baby?
  • Baby: *hugs* I love you.
  • Daddy: I love you too. I'm so scared of you leaving. I know I can do better but I--
  • Baby: Shh. I love you. You're the best daddy I can ask for. I can't expect you to always be there for me because I know you get busy. It's my fault for always getting upset when you can't be there. I just really miss you is all. There may be people better than you but I don't want them. I want you. I love you more than anyone else in the world, flaws and all.
  • Daddy: *sniffling* I love you too princess.
Jeff Atkins Imagine #1

Yay im adding 13rw to my list of imagine… things anyways

I hope this is good because I legit love jeff but tony is my fav… and HE DESERVED BETTER and this takes place before Hannah and Jeff…. *cries*

~~

Originally posted by cynicalsunset

    Most of the time, you were the one in the relationship to get extremely mad. Sometimes your boyfriend Jeff was too nice for you, too calm for everything and that made you angry sometimes. Especially when you wanted him to yell and let his true feelings out. You could see veins throbbing in his muscular body when you two fought and it made you worried that one day he would explode. You wanted Jeff to get mad at you because it worried you if he didn’t.

And one day you had enough. You two (more like just you) had been fighting over the fact that Jeff seemed to be spending more time with Clay and his other friends more than he had been with you, and all Jeff could do was sigh and tell you he was sorry. 

“Y/N, baby I’m sorry. Clay’s been hanging out with Hannah and I know he likes her and I just want him to be happy. He hasn’t liked someone this much since kinder.” Jeff said as he watched you pace in the library, where Clay had just left from after helping him with his paper. 

There he was, giving valid excuses. Excuses that you actually thought were cute and didn’t want to stop, but you were so angry that he just didn’t tell you off. You would have liked it better. You hated that you were the bad guy in the relationship. 

“Come on, baby.” Jeff said, getting up from his seat and wrapping his arms around you from behind. He rested his chin on your shoulder as you stared ahead. “I’m sorry. I’ll take you to the movies tonight if you want? I’ll skip one practice just for you. The new Ouija movie came out yesterday and I know you want to see it.” 

You felt the heat bubble under your skin as you thought of his kindness, and when you didn’t answer Jeff placed a kiss on your temple. “You know I would spend more time with you if I could, Y/N. Please…”

“Jeff, stop!” You said sharply, pulling away. He looked at you while his jaw tightened. You could tell he was angry that you were still angry. You knew he hated that he was being honest and you were still being a bitch, and you hated yourself for walking away too. 

You ran out of the library, running at the back of Clay’s retreating backside, calling out his name. “Clay, wait up!” 

Clay turned around with his eyebrows furrowed, his mouth open slightly. “Hey, Y/N… weren’t you just fighting with Jeff?” 

“Jensen when you witness someone get into a fight you don’t ask questions three seconds later.” You sighed, before laughing at his expression. 

“Right.” He said, nodding and then continuing to walk. You walked with him, only glancing back slightly to see that Jeff was standing at the door of the library with his arms crossed. 

You turned away quickly. “You want to go to Rosie’s with me? My treat.” You asked Clay, fixing your shirt. 

“Uh, well,” Clay looked back as well but you stayed looking ahead. “I have work at seven so…” 

“It doesn’t take that long to eat a meal, Jensen. Come on.” You hooked your elbow with his and put on a fake smile, beginning to tease him about Hannah, who just so happened to be one of your new friends. 

~

It had been a few days since your fight with Jeff, and since then you had been ignoring him to your greatest extent. You wanted him to confront you, to tell you you were being a bitch, which three people had told you so far. You wanted Jeff to act normal. But yet despite the severe case of bitchiness you were showing him, Jeff still went out of his way to send you goodnight, goodmorning, and just in general cute texts. He kept apologizing, but that’s not what you wanted. You wanted him to be a human and get angry and yell, sometimes his perfect collect and physique got you. Sometimes it made you feel insecure because you weren’t like Jeff and you felt like you didn’t deserve him. Jeff deserved better

But on this particular day, after three consecutive days that you had been ignoring Jeff, you guessed it got too much for him. It was after a baseball game, and the minute that the game had ended and Jeff had won the game for the team you shot out of your seat like the rest of the crowd, yelling loudly. 

You threw your half eaten hot dog to the ground and ran off of the bleachers as the baseball team was walking to the locker rooms. Bryce Walker, a friend of Jeff’s, was walking right in front of your smiling boyfriend, both of them covered in red dirt and giving high fives away like candy. 

“Bryce!” You yelled out, catching the attention of both men. This was your last try at getting Jeff mad. At giving him a chance to explode on you. At being a little less perfect. 

“Y/N?” Bryce said with a little confusion and a lot of excitement. He held out his arms hesitantly and you shrugged before giving him a giant hug, laughing loudly. 

“Good game, Bryce! You did good out there.” Your eyes went wide when his hands lingered too low on your waist, instantly pushing him a little with laughter. “Any plans for celebration? I’ve got weed.” 

Bryce raised his eyebrows and grinned, twisting his bat in his hands. “Wow, didn’t know you smoked, Y/N! Well me and the guys are getting together for a little fun stuff. The hot tub will definitely be put to good use. Any chance you wanna share the stuff?” 

You could see Jeff out of the corner of your eye, his neck and temple throbbing with veins. He was getting angry. You still ignored him. 

“Hell yeah, I’ve got a new two piece I have to show off.” You winked cheekily and Bryce coughed loudly. 

“Of course your boyfriend would be coming too.” He said while glancing at Jeff. 

“So?” 

It all happened in a flash, one second you were walking next to Bryce and the next there was the clatter of a bat and you were swept off of your feet and thrown over someone’s back. It was Jeff and he was completely ditching his route to the locker rooms and was carrying you the direction of the parking lot, which was slowly clearing out. 

“We still on?” Bryce called out. 

You nodded while struggling in Jeff’s tight grip. Jesus, you had a good view of his ass and muscular arms. “Fuck,” You cursed. “Jeff, ease up a bit on the grip, I bruise easily.” 

Jeff said nothing but obliged to your request, his breathing hard and fast. Honestly, you were scared a little bit. You knew this is what you had wanted, but you didn’t exactly know what was in store for you. Was he going to break up with you? Murder you and throw your body in a ditch. Angry Jeff was unpredictable because he hardly ever existed. 

When you two arrived at his car he set you down a little roughly, throwing his baseball cap off of his head and running his fingers through his hair. “What did I do?” He asked softly despite his rough demeanor. 

You thought you had heard wrong. “What?” 

“WHAT DID I DO?” Jeff yelled loudly, his face going red. “WHAT DID I DO TO MAKE YOU SO COLD TOWARDS ME! I LOVE YOU, BUT Lately you’ve been acting like such a- such a- BITCH!” 

Part of you was relieved that he had called you that, but not when the guilt suddenly ate his features. “NO- no, Jeff! It wasn’t you oh MY GOD! It was me, Jeff, I was a bitch, I am a bitch don’t apologize.” 

“No, you’re not oh my God, I’m so-” 

“JEFF! Please don’t apologize! Do something! Call me names, yell at me, look at this point I don’t care! Punch me, let out your anger, Jeff! God, I hate seeing you like this, angry but you don’t do anything.” 

Jeff was confused, his chest heaving. “Baby, you know i hate being angry. It makes me feel like a bad person.” 

You let out a huge breath of air as you turned around in a circle, tugging at the roots of your hair. “Jeff,God, Jeff does that mean I’m a bad person? Jeff, you’re human it’s okay to be mad and it’s okay to yell every once in a while. Do you know how it makes me feel when you can do everything with so much kindness and positivity? It makes me feel insecure because I’m not as pure as you and I’m a big bitch. God, I love you, Jeff, but please just get angry at me. It is my fault.” 

Jeff stood there for a second, staring at you and processing your words. His eyes gazed over your face and you shifted uncomfortably after a second. Then, without warning he surged forward and kissed you sweetly and despite his sweaty hands and body he tasted like mint. 

When he pulled back he smiled and shook his head. “You ignored me for three whole days because you were angry that I never get angry? That’s kind of ridiculous, babe. Listen, I do these things, I put up with you even when you’re irrational because I know you feel bad when you do it. I know that it doesn’t matter how long it takes you always apologize. Let me guess this way your last attempt?” 

You grumbled slightly because Jeff was grinning down at you now, his hands on your shoulders as his fingers squeezed you lightly. “Yes.” 

“Baby, in so many ways it makes you better than me, because I bottle those emotions up. One day I told my mom off because I was angry at Zach and I didn’t do anything about it. He doesn’t know that breaking my lucky bat was wrong because he thought I was okay with it, because I didn’t get angry. Please, Y/N, don’t feel insecure with me. We’re both a little rusty on our humanity skills baby.” 

You nodded and Jeff did so too, placing his forehead across yours as he smiled before enveloping your lips in his, his teeth grazing your bottom lip teasingly. “I love you, Jeff.” 

“I love you too, Y/N.” 

“More than anything in the world.” You both said together before kissing once more.

“Now let me tell you how hot you look when you’re yelling, Jeff.” 

(PLS FEEDBACK IF I SHOULD DO MORE)(not edited)

Originally posted by sadiaxxstylesxxstiles

grvssi  asked:

this one is for alex directly: how does it feel knowing that your words have changed lives for the better? i found your band 9 years ago when my dad died and everything since then has been so much easier to get through. thank you. i have your words tattooed on my arm forever and it reminds me i'm alive and well every single day.

Sorry to hear about your dad, but I’m really glad our music could help you through. 

And to answer your first question it feels amazing. It’s really surreal being told that sometimes.

8

You can survive this happening to you.

I am detached
from feelings
and I’m so sorry
once again,
I let myself
get in the way
of things that
could be,
but won’t be
because I shouldn’t
say I love you
just to hear another
I told you so
letters to myself
disclosed, detached
these were supposed
to be the better days
but I’m not okay
I’m unhappy
and it’s not your fault
you shouldn’t have
to put up with me
you shouldn’t have
to love me
for what it’s worth
we could’ve been
something so much more
than just another poem
that I can’t write
these are Shakespeare’s
last words with a spin
and a twist, remembering
ways to not grab your hips
remembering ways
to not kiss your lips
there is poison slipped
into my pens,
I don’t write love poems
I write we’re kinda
fucked poems
I don’t write prose
I write the story
of the dying rose
If I give and give
If you take and take
If I love and love
and you trust and trust
which parts of us
will understand me
when I’m alone and numb
without you clogging up
my heart with another
apology that sounds like
I’m sorry, I wish we could’ve been
I wish we could be more
than just a pile of lust
and sin that won’t happen
dear Heavenly Father,
forgive me for my wicked ways
if I pray and pray
if I duck and dodge
your solemn words
that sever ties
that paint the walls
of my soul into crispy gold
into melted snow
my thoughts will follow
some lovers have hands
that I could hold
but I can’t stay
if I’m still not
over the mountain
of regrets and no,
I’ll leave by sunrise
even if your clothes are on
and we didn’t make love
we’re naked to the truth
you can see it in my eyes
I hate telling lies
so I don’t talk much
I hate small talk
so I don’t make friends
I don’t trust people
I barely trust myself
I’m a sinner that knows
how to love,
I’m an angel that fell
from above
another misunderstanding
and we’re still far from this place
baby, I’m detached from you
you deserve the moon and the stars
I cannot give you the universe
I cannot give you the sun
but maybe somebody else can
I cannot be in love with you
I cannot be in love with you
if I still don’t understand
if I still don’t know how to love myself
and if you love me for how I am
and if you have stayed this long
and if you really are in love with me
then understand that I am detached
a loop, a maze, a graze on your lips
I wear us thin into the pen
A pen is my weapon
and these words
are the cuts that I am made of
some truths sink into your skin
this love is razor sharp,
I’m out of bandages
I’m all out of love
I’m with shadows
near the shoreline
looking for inspiration
upon desperation
slowly now, slowly now
into the sunrise
one day from my ashes
I will rise, I will rise
—  detached
Shiksa Goddess - Pietro Maximoff x Reader

Words: 1136
Pairing: Pietro Maximoff x Reader
Featuring: Natasha Romanoff, Clint Barton, Tony Stark
Warnings: there is so much fluff its cliche
Requested by anon
Clint and Nat making fun of reader and Pietro for being too cutesy and for being that annoyingly sweet couple that nobody can stand for free of getting cavities.
Authors Note: So the request did not ask for this to be a song imagine, but when I read annoyingly sweet I thought of this song, Shiksa Goddess from The Last Five Years- you can listen to it here! And I have done my research, Shiksa Goddess is a term used by Jewish people to describe non Jewish people, HOWEVER THIS IMAGINE DOES NOT ACTUALLY USE THE TERM SHIKSA GODDESS OR MAKE ANY REFRENCE TO RELIGION SO IT CAN BE READ BY ANYONE! I did not want to limit anyone or offend anyone so it was best to leave religion out of this, it is meerly just the song name :) (Sorry it has been so long without an imagine out, I’ve been really sick.)

Pietro Masterlist. Masterlist.


“Hey, how’s your leg rash doing?” Natasha asked Clint as they walked around the base.

“Much better. It’s really annoying, though,” He groaned.

Natasha shook her head with a laugh. “If you were more careful and didn’t think you could slide on the grass and not get hurt, then you wouldn’t have gotten the rash.”

“Where’s the fun in that?” Clint shook his head.

Tony almost ran into the pair when he sped around the corner. After almost dropping his coffee all over the place, Natasha noticed how his eyes were bugging out. “Be warned. Do not eat food in the kitchen right now; you will only throw it up if you stay in there. Good luck,” Tony told them, and ran out of the way.

Clint and Natasha gave each other confused looks, unsure of what Tony meant. They figured he could be overreacting, as he usually does, and continued on their way.

It was later at night, so there was no surprise that there had been some drinking by many in the base. Clint and Natasha walked into the kitchen, that was connected to the common room, and found you sitting on the couch next to Pietro. It was obvious that you both had a bit to drink, as there were bottles on the table in front of you.

Keep reading

Kitchen Sink.

TW: major character death, graphic depictions of suicide
Also, this is probably my longest one shot yet coming in at 1,800+ words. So, woo for that? Enjoy?
——

If they had only known.
Oh god, if they had only known.

Shiro glanced around the training arena, doing a mental head count and coming up short. They were one paladin short.

Hunk was here, standing a little ways away with Pidge, who was helping him with something regarding his armor.

Two down, and he was here.
That was three.

Keith stood brooding, his leadership position something that left him in a sour mood. Shiro was back, he should lead.

That was four Paladins out of five.
One color of the Voltron rainbow was missing. A very blue color.

Not yet wanting to cause lots of stress, Shiro walked over to Keith with a hint of worry in his tone. “Have you seen Lance this morning?”

It must have been on the new black Paladins mind as well, because Keith flinched at Shiro’s question.

The blue paladin had been last present the night before, but he had been acting very strange. A huge contrast to the typical quiet they had been getting for a few weeks.

Lance had been insisting on Hunk making the greatest Earth-like dinner just for once, so they could feast that night.

They did, it was delicious.
Garlic knots came to the party.

Lance was loud and he was joking; he was a hoard of smiles and laughter. It had made everyone suspicious at this sudden mood change but they were so happy to finally see life in Lance that they blew it off.

Except Keith. Except the leader.

He watched his teammate carefully that night, and saw that behind that laughter there was something forced. Behind the smile, there were cracked teeth.

Behind those bright eyes, something looked like it was dead, dull, and gone.

Keith didn’t say anything.

He didn’t say anything when Lance took Allura into the blue lion and for some reason decided to tell her all about how to fly her.

Lance showed her the best techniques, told some of the things Blue did and didn’t prefer, and even gave her some personal tips.

He just wanted to show his lion off, would have been his excuse if anyone asked. But no one asked.

If anyone had asked…
Oh god if they had only known.

Keith shifted in his spot, uncrossing his arms and looked to Shiro. “No, not since last night. He wasn’t at breakfast.”

A cold feeling crept through Shiro, but he nodded and patted Keith’s shoulder. “I’m going to ask the others. Maybe Lance is sick.”

Keith nodded once, before his eyes drifted to land on the door he had been staring at for hours. He waited for his friend to walk through.

“Hunk! Pidge!” Shiro called, jogging over to the green and yellow paladin with a small smile.

“Shiro!” Hunk saluted and turned to face their ex-leader, smiling. Pidge rose a curious eyebrow.

“Have either of you two seen Lance this morning? We are doing something new today and we don’t want to start without him.” Shiro went straight to the point before the worry settled too hard in his gut.

“Lance? No…” Pidge replied, looking up at the black paladin and then around as if she were looking for the missing associate, and only just noticing he wasn’t there.

“I saw Lance on my way to the bathroom sometime early this morning. He looked like he just came from the hangar.”

Hunk started, innocence in his tone, “I asked him what he was doing and he nearly jumped out of his skin. But he smiled and said he had thought Blue sent him a distress wave, but it was a false alarm.”

Shiro and Pidge shared a look, and Pidge was the one to ask. “What time was that?”

Hunk thought momentarily. How long ago had that been? Was Lance back in the hangar now?

“Ugh, I’d probably say…like a few hours ago? It felt like three in the morning.” Hunk shrugged, rubbing the back of his neck.

An odd silence passed through them and no one was sure what to do. Go look for him? He was probably still in bed, or something like that.

Allura’s voice came over the com suddenly, “Paladins, we must start training. Where is Lance? He is not answering coms and he didn’t respond to the alarm system.”

Keith looked up quickly at that, “He wasn’t answering his coms?” His purple-ish eyes went across the room to the others, and apprehension set in.

“We should go look for him.” Pidge concluded, already starting for the door with Hunk at her heels.

“Yeah, Pidge and I will check the hallways, and the hangar.” Hunk informed, the duo off quickly.

“I’ll check his bedroom. Shiro, can you check the kitchen?” Keith asked, but it was more of an order.

“Of course.” And the search was on.

Keith left after Shiro, and made his way for Lances room. It was oddly quiet, no sounds of music or Lance singing or even a shower running. It made him uneasy.

He approached the door, and knocked once. “Lance?” No answer.

The former red paladin was not going to wait around for Lance to respond any longer, so he let the door open for him and he stepped into the dark room.

No signs of anyone being in here could be found, and Keiths brows furrowed. That was odd. Did Lance stay with the blue lion last night?

If so, Pidge and Hunk would be sure to find him, right? Standing in this room, something felt wrong to Keith.

Lance had been acting pretty strangely for the past few weeks. He had gotten quieter, and ha stopped voluntarily includin himself in the others events.

Keith was the only one who noticed.
He watched each time Lance tried to become part of the group, yet dos nothing as each time his voice was silenced.

It got to the point where Lance would just sulk off to his bedroom until dinner, or even breakfast the morning after.

Keith never did anything.
Lance shouldn’t be so weak, he should force himself into the circle and not wait to be allowed in, right?

Keith realized now he should have said something. Had Lance run away? Was he just hiding so someone would finally notice him?

As if on cue, a chorus of shouts erupted in Keiths skull and he was drawn from his reverie.

“—notes in our lions!”

“What? What was that, Hunk?” Keith asked, bolting from Lances room and making his way to the Hangar.

“Lance left these notes in our lions! We didn’t read them all but I think he’s in trouble.” Hunk said, voice nervous.

“He said something about leaving a place he didn’t belong. I’m not sure but I thin—”

Suddenly a harsh gasp wen through all Paladins heads, and a faint ‘No…’ entered their hearing.

“Shiro?”

“No, L-Lance…” Shiros voice cracked.

And then they were all running. Meeting in the halls they all made a break for the kitchen and their armor boots pounded on the floor of the castle.

When they finally made it to their destination… they couldn’t believe what they were seeing.

Shiro was frozen in an open doorway, staring in at a figure slumped forward near the sink.

Lance.

And his jacket was tied around his neck and his skin was pale. His head was bowed forward, slightly tilted. He looked small and sad, as if he were sure ending to the fate that was strapped around his neck.

The jacket around his neck was tied tightly around the faucet of the sink, one sleeve tied in a half assed noose that was ill practiced.

“Lance!!!” Pidge screamed, and ran forward only to be yanked back by Shiro who held onto her an went to the ground.

Keith replaced Shiro, and stood frozen in he doorway. This…

Hunk was the one who approached Lance. He came forward very slowly and tilted his friends chin up, to look at him.

There were tear stains on his cheeks.

His tongue was swollen, and his chin wet, lips red rimmed along with his eyes. His cheeks were swollen just a little, the skin at his throat trapped and irritated by the jacket.

Hunk slowly cut it from his friends neck, and no one in that room would forget the way Lance just fell.

To his side, with deep ridges in his neck from the killing device. Hunk felt for a pulse but didn’t need to when his fingers touched Lances neck and he was freezing.

It had only been at most seven hours since Hunk saw his friend, alive and walking. This must have happened only moments after their meet.

A sob came from behind them and when Keith broke out of his daze to look, Pidge was holding slips of folded paper.

She read from one of them, and by then very one was in tears and no one had any idea what to do with Lance. They couldn’t look at him, couldn’t see him like that.

To see someone once so full of life snuffed out by his own choosing, quieter after acing a voice so loud.

It wasn’t fair.

How someone who was loved by others couldn’t love himself and now he was gone and nobody had the chance to say anything, to do anything.

Now, their friend was hanging by his own jacket on the kitchen sink. He had been so desperate to leave the horrid place they had made for him, so he went like…that.

Someone who used to bring so much light to a place in the darkest times, was now left in the darkness to his own demise an nobody was there to stop him.

He was that helpless, that desperate.
So lonely and so sad, to blow out the candle that everyone had been seeing by.

Oh god if they ha only known.

‘If you’re reading this, Keith, you probably know what happened. You’re probably dancing get my dead body right now anyway, ripping this up into confetti. So I’ll keep this short.

I wasn’t happy here. I didn’t feel I belonged with you guys anymore, as you cast me out and made it known I wasn’t wanted around. I wasn’t needed around.

Even Blue didn’t want me around anymore and I think that hurt the most. It really did.

I wish I could have been on better terms with you, but I understand why you hate me. I hated me too.

So I left. Sorry I had to do it in the kitchen like that but there’s not much of anywhere to hang from in this castle so I used the sink. I hope I didn’t break anything.

Isn’t that how that guy killed himself in that movie you liked? You told me it was actually a pretty popular way to go.

You know me, always trying to be one with the crowd. And Keith?

You were a great leader.
I really mean it.

P.S. Make sure Pidge sleeps. And Hunk eats, and that Shiro gets out of his room sometimes. Help Coran out around the castle. And flirt with Allura for me.’

Oh god if they had only known.

anonymous asked:

How did Az get fucked over with the Moriel thing?

-Because the relationship between them was twisted from ‘mutual interest with issues on both side and Az’s insecurity holding him back from pursuing a relationship with a woman who is ready to be with him but is holding herself back due to respecting him, his experiences and choices’ to ‘creepy, obsessive straight guy can’t take a hint and quietly pines after a queer woman for five hundred years making her actively uncomfortable with his attentions and being a contributing factor in her remaining closeted as well as sleeping with men she may or may not want to to maintain distance between them/. That’s….Fucked up on so many levels I can’t. (And this is not a condemnation of Az’s character - this is a condemnation of Maas’ writing because this should never have been done to him, it disgusts me) 

-Because Azriel was set-up to serve as a safe space for Mor in ACOMAF (he watches out for her, he supports her, he protects her, he is the one to go and talk to her and help calm her down when she’s upset and panicky. This is explicitly canon) and in ACOWAR she’s made to be afraid of him/ his outbursts. Cassian is forced between them as a buffer to make her feel safer/to relax afterwards. She sleeps with Helion/other men to remind Azriel she isn’t interested in him/to force distance between them. She is “petrified” of coming out to him. (This is a complaint beyond my Moriel shipping, obviously I shipped them romantically

-Because it’s implied that Eris knows about Mor’s sexuality and wouldn’t have touched her/forced her to be with him…But Azriel is set up as still loving her and lusting after her somehow completely oblivious to her sexuality/lack of interest in him. And I’m supposed to believe this…And be okay with it. That a man who abused her, who left her to die, who terrifies and traumatises her…Has more regard for her choices and feelings than Azriel, who was set up to love her unconditionally, to represent safety and security for her. Like. Sure.  

-Because I’m having a harder and harder time accepting the CoN fiasco as being in character for Az. It feels lazy to me. He’s a cookie-cutter copy of Rhys in that scene. I could POTENTIALLY have gone with Azriel not warning Mor about Eris the way Rhys did if it had been for her, if it had been to somehow protect her because she wasn’t supposed to be there/know until later (god fucking knows this thing is impossible to retcon) But I’m having a harder and harder time accepting him not telling her for the same reason as Rhys ‘I don’t trust you, you’re a silly, oversensitive child and I’m afraid you’re going to fuck this up for us’. Not Az, not with Mor, like, sorry. It feels like something to draw lines between them and force them apart/retcon/undo the Moriel set-up she did in ACOMAF to try and make the reveal better. 

-Because (this is my personal interpretation/opinion and not one I expect many people to share, and is something I’m having a lot of difficulty putting into words but…) A lot of the Cassian/Mor moments in ACOWAR felt like they should have been Mor/Azriel moments that were dramatically retconned/that Cassian was made far more physically affectionate and closer to Mor than initially appeared in ACOMAF to further force distance between moriel, give Mor some kind of support but strip away any potential Azriel/Mor scenes because of the “”””reveal”””” of her sexuality and Maas’ sudden desire to stop baiting the ship as much. (I loved the Cassian/Mor moments in ACOWAR, I’ve already said this but some of them felt…Like a lot more/altered from their relationship in ACOMAF which I felt demonstrated their unconditional love/support for one another while also maintaining aspects of friction and volatility that they do have. Like I said I’m struggling putting this into words but some parts felt like this was being shoved down my throat just a little too much. might just have been bad writing, might have been forcing Cass as the buffer and forcing Mor and Az further apart. I don’t know) 

-Because Moriel could have been a beautiful platonic relationship about the deep, undying unconditional love that these two people have for one another; for the lengths they will go to for one another and the things they would do and sacrifice to keep each other safe….Instead I’ve got a narrative involving a ‘petrified’ closeted queer woman and a man who can’t take a hint and obsessively won’t let her go/stop loving her despite what it does for her and like….I’m sorry but Azriel deserved so much fucking better than that. It’s disgusting. I feel vaguely ill writing all this out. 

I was happy with the Az content coming out of ACOWAR (and needing some kind of light in this black pit I probably got blinded by that to begin with) the flying lessons with Feyre were excellent, his moments during battle were beautiful, his rescue of Elain showed the compassion that he has in-line with Cassian. 

But I can’t ignore this seriously ugly undercurrent and how it transforms Azriel from a (legitimately) traumatised, insecure abuse victim lacking self worth and self esteem after the horrific abuse he endured as a child…And forces him into the narrative of the entitled straight man whose obsessive love makes a girl feel too afraid to say no to him and like…I’m sorry but in fucking up Moriel with this Dramatic Plot Twist Maas screwed over Mor’s character (infinitely more than Az’s, I’m not arguing that for a second) but it fucks Azriel’s up too. And not because ‘oh no he’s going to be so sad when she comes out to him the poor bat’ but because it turns him into an obsessive creep who, in some ways, is marked out as looking worse than her abuser. 

Bottom line is, what Maas did with the Moriel in ACOWAR fucks up Mor’s character, Azriel’s character, and the entire dynamic of the Inner Circle. I genuinely cannot believe how poorly this ‘twist’ was thought out. I feel gross now. I’m going to take a shower. 

Are there any post civil war fics where Wanda realizes that leaving with Clint was a bad idea and she should’ve just stayed at the compound? It be cool to see Wanda go off on Clint for dragging her into it. Maybe realizing that Tony might have been right and isn’t as horrible as she thinks he is?

Bucky Imagine #2 | Human Again

Originally posted by bucha-nan


“What do you feel like, Bucky? Want just a trim?”

He was quick to shake his head, the hair in question falling into his eyes.

“I want it gone. Can you,” he paused, “can you do something like you do for Steve?”

“Still fond of the 40’s cut, huh?” (y/n) hummed in thought, running her fingers gently through the long brown tresses. “Sure, I can do that. Tilt your head back a little, Sugar, so I can wash it for you.”

Bucky gently let himself lean back into the kitchen sink, his body stiff and rigid. As soon as he felt her fingers on his scalp, however, he was putty in her hands. She laughed under her breath, using her fingernails to massage a little firmer when he pushed into her touch.

“That water temperature okay?”

He grunted in an answer, not trusting his own voice right now. He almost whined when he felt her hands leave him but in an instant they were back, and the smell of fruit and flowers filled his nose. She lathered up the shampoo, continuing her wonderous attention on his head.

“Sorry, I ran out of the stuff I usually use for the guys.”

He shrugged as much as he could in the position he was in, not wanting to admit he actually preferred the more feminine smelling soap. She scrubbed for a few more minutes than necessary, enjoying the small sighs of contentment that he couldn’t hold in. Too soon for his liking, she rinsed out the suds and wrapped a towel around his shoulders.

“Okay, go ahead and sit up.” He followed orders, droplets of water falling down his cheeks and chin. “Whoops, sorry honey.” (y/n) dabbed the water off him with a second towel, ruffling up his hair to remove as much moisture as she could. He looked like a poodle when she pulled away, and if she would have known him a little better, she would have laughed out loud at the Winter Soldier’s current appearance.

She led him to the second chair in the middle of the kitchen, combing out the tangles as gently as she could. Bucky hadn’t been here for long, so she was careful to avoid anything that could possibly trigger him. She picked up the shiny hair shears slowly, making sure to tell him exactly what she was doing with every step.

“I’m just gonna start trimming okay?” He nodded. “Alright, here we go.”

It took the better part of an hour to work out all the knots, cutting off bits here and there to make it all easier to clip. She ran the clippers slowly across the sides, shortening them to the perfect length, but paused when she reached the top section of hair.

“How about we keep the top a little long?”

He had to force himself to answer her, too blissed out with the attention he was receiving. It had been years since he felt another human’s hand in a loving way and he couldn’t really muster a response, just hummed low in his chest.

“Mmhmm…”

She giggled, trimming the top section so it fell forward in a quiff. When he no longer felt her presence behind him, he opened his eyes, startled to see her now standing in between his legs. (y/n) was unphased by his reaction, leaning down just inches from him and tugging his hair forward in her fingers. He swallowed thickly, trying to avert his eyes but she tugged a bit harder in retaliation.

“Nu-uh, look ahead at me so I can check the length.”

This woman is killing me.

“Good, nice and even,” she patted his cheek in praise, much like he had seen her do to Tony. She grabbed a little bottle off the counter, squirting some of its contents out and rubbing it between her palms. Bucky fidgeted when she brought her hands back to his hair, returning to her previous scratch/massage motions.

“What’s that?” He asked, curious as he felt her begin to comb and shape the locks into place.

“Just a little pomade, er, I guess to you and Steve it would have just been called ‘gel’.” He could remember hair gel but never really used it, it made his hair uncomfortably crunchy. He sniffed the air, catching a whiff of the sweet fragrance when she scrunched up the sides.

“Smells good.” (y/n) agreed, grabbing a straight razor to trim the stray hairs on the back of his neck.

“It’s green apple, one of my favorites. Hold still.” The cool metal of the razor felt good against his skin and he had to admit he was a little sad when she announced that she was finished. She unwrapped the towel from his shoulders, handing him a small pink mirror. “There ya go, whad’ya think?”

Bucky was shocked to think that the man in the reflection was really him. His hair was perfectly styled, short and neat but with a new little flair. It took him back to the 40′s, before everything went wrong, and it flooded him with warmth. The feeling was overwhelming and before he could talk himself out of it, he had pulled (y/n) in for an almost bruising bear-hug.

“Thank you. Thank you for making me feel human again.” She smiled against his hard chest, returning his hug with no hesitation.

“You’re so welcome, Bucky.”


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BTS / Their S/O waking up from a coma with no memory

Request: Hello can you plz do bts and got7 reaction to their s/o in coma because of accident after arguing with them and finally wake up after 2 months and lost memory… if you could 😂😂😂 thx

Thank you for requesting this! Hope you enjoy!      

GOT7 VERSION IS HERE   

TRIGGER WARNING! accidents resulting in hospital stay. Also, a looooot of angst.


Jin

Originally posted by arkysal

When you had left your shared apartment after a huge argument, Jin didn’t think much of it. He thought the two of you would take a quick break and then make up like you always did.

So, needless to say, when two hours after you left the apartment, he received a call from an unknown number, he wasn’t expecting to hear the voice of a surgeon from the hospital, announcing that you’ve gotten into a car accident and suffered injuries so severe that the doctors had to put you in a medically induced coma.

Jin thought he completely blacked out, then. He didn’t even remember how he got to the hospital. He didn’t even remember how the doctors had to give him a sedative because he wouldn’t stop yelling at the doctors to let him see you.

Once they finally let him in, he refused to leave your side.

So, for the next two months, Jin had basically moved to the hospital. He was on a first name bases with every nurse and even befriended an old grandmother from the hospital room next to yours. She was the only reason why some days he could go hours without crying, and that was because she kept telling him that you’d wake up and he’d get a chance to apologize for all the things he said before your accident.

And finally, her words came true. Exactly two months after being taken to the hospital, you started to show signs of waking up, and within a few days, you managed to open your eyes.

“Y/n?!” he jumped up from the seat in which he was living while you weren’t conscious. “Y/n, can you hear me?”

“I…” you tried to speak but it proved to be difficult. “Where..?”

“You’re in the hospital,” Jin, understanding what you wanted to say, answered. “You’ve gotten into a horrible car crash and you’ve been in a coma for what seems like an eternity.”

“C-coma?” you asked, suddenly even more awake. “W-where’s my family?”

Although a pang of anxiety hit his stomach, Jin tried to play it off. “I’m your family, jagi. I’m right here.”

You turned your head a few inches so you could look at him better.

“I’m so s-sorry,” you managed to say. “But I don’t know you.”

Jin could have sworn your words hurt as much as the news of your car crash did all those months ago. He was glad he was sitting because his entire body had gone limp.

“You don’t remember me?” he whispered.

You could tell how much pain he was in, but you weren’t going to lie to make him feel better. So, you shook your head.

“I’m sorry.”


Suga

Originally posted by ohbaibeeitsyou

It was just another fight. Just another stupid fight. These were the thoughts that were running through Yoongi’s head while he was driving to the hospital after having received a call from your sobbing mum. He couldn’t understand anything she was saying, so he told her he’d come and hung up the phone.

Although he was expecting something bad, he wasn’t expecting this. The news that you were hit by a car after running out of your apartment because of the fight you had with him caused him such a huge shock that he jumped right into the second stage of grief: anger.

He hit walls. He threw a couple of chairs. He yelled at people.  

Only when the doctor allowed him to enter your room, he managed to calm down. You suffered multiple injuries that caused you to fall into a coma and have damaged your face, and yet as Yoongi looked at you, he still saw you as the most beautiful person on the planet.

His heart was breaking more and more with every passing day that your body hasn’t shown responses to anything he was saying to you.

And then, a month later, when he was holding your hand and softly humming a song he had come up with at your bedside, he heard a different sound.

“W-wh-what..?”

He raised his head at the speed of light and was met with your wide open eyes.

“Y/n!” he screamed despite himself, scaring you a little. “You’re awake? How long have you been awake? How are you feeling? Should I call a doctor?”

Overwhelmed by so many questions, you just stared at him.

“Wh-who… are… y-you?” you asked slowly, staring at him in confusion.

“Who am—what?” Yoongi’s excitement faded away. “I’m… wait, you don’t remember?”

You frowned, not understanding what you were supposed to remember.

“M-my mum? Where… is she?” you asked slowly.

But he just stood there. His broken heart had completely shattered by your unfamiliarity and he couldn’t form words anymore. The sound of your hospital room door opening sounded somewhere in the distance. Even the voices of the nurses who came into the room seemed to come from somewhere far away.

He felt as if he just entered his worst nightmare.


J-Hope

Originally posted by wonhobe

As soon as you slammed the door closed and left, he ran after you. He opened the door of the building to see pouring rain. Which is why it took him a moment to see you start running across the street. Running right in front of a truck.

He thought he screamed. But the only thing he could hear was the sound of the truck braking and the sound of your body hitting the pavement.

The owner of the truck called an ambulance while Hoseok checked your vitals, all while trying to control himself and not cry. At least you were alive, so that gave him hope.

Once in the hospital, after having waited for hours until your surgery was completed, he was told that you were in a coma, and that was the second blow to his self-control that day.

He couldn’t take it anymore. He broke down next to your bed.

The entire time you were in a coma, he was closed off, cold, and distant to everyone. He barely left your hospital room, and the doctors threatened to lock him up in a hospital if he didn’t get a grip on himself. Hoseok didn’t listen. He was never going to leave you.

So, he was there when you moved your hand, weeks after the accident. He was there when your heart rate sped up, along with his. He was already kissing your hand when you opened your eyes for the first time in so long.

“My love,” he said right away. “Can you hear me?”

“What h-happened?” you asked slowly and quietly, not being able to talk louder.

“You got into an accident. You’ve been in a coma for almost a month,” Hoseok explained softly, as he caressed your hand.

“Why a-are you here?”

He froze. “What do you mean?”

“I d-don’t know who you are,” you said, trying to clear your throat to speak clearer. “Why are you t-touching me?”

And just like that, the joy of you finally waking up was outweighed by the hurt. He had feared you would be mad at him because of the fight you had before the accident. He had no idea you wouldn’t be able to remember who he was at all.


RM

Originally posted by theseoks

He was the one who stormed out of your apartment. He was sick of fighting with you, and he wanted to be alone for a while.

A couple of hours later, his phone lit up with a message from your best friend. Confused, he unlocked his phone to read it.

“There’s been a fire,” the message read simply.

Namjoon froze. He dialed your best friend’s number, hoping for an explanation. She was in a state of shock and couldn’t form coherent sentences, which made him even more confused, but he managed to hear “hospital” and “coma” and that was enough to send him running.

He found your friends and family in the hospital waiting room. All of them were crying and he had just had a breakdown in his car on the way here, so he was trying to pull himself together for the rest of them, and for you.

He couldn’t help the guilt of leaving you alone after that fight, too. He felt that if he hadn’t left, none of this would have happened. Which is why he refused to leave your side for longer than five minutes. And even when your family was slowly starting to lose hope that you’d wake up, he was the one to tell them that you would. That you would never leave them.

And he was right. After two torturous months, you finally opened your eyes.

“Mum?” was the first thing you said in a hoarse voice, as your mother burst into tears and despite the doctor’s orders not to crowd you, hugged you immediately.

“Oh, honey,” she gasped, as she kissed your face repeatedly. “We thought we lost you. We really did. Namjoon was the only one giving us hope.”

“W-who?” you asked, as she pulled away.

Namjoon’s smile left his face. Your mother glanced at him and then looked back at you in confusion.

“Namjoon,” she told you, pointing at him. “He spent every day by your bedside, waiting for you to wake up.

“Mum, I-I don’t know who t-that is,” you whispered almost fearfully.

Namjoon felt sick. He knew he was about to throw up, so he exited your hospital room and dry-heaved in the hallway, replaying your words over and over in his head, not believing it.

When he finally raised his head, he saw your mother’s sorry eyes looking at him, as she had walked outside to check on him.

“She doesn’t remember me,” he whispered painfully. “Sh-she has no idea who I am.”


Jimin

Originally posted by jiminrolls

This was the first serious fight the two of you had. Both of you decided that maybe you fought because you’ve spent so much time together, so maybe you needed to be away from each other for a while.

Which is why Jimin wasn’t there to tell you to be careful when you climbed on the counter to reach the top shelf – the comfort food shelf – in your kitchen. He wasn’t there either, when you lost your balance and fell off the counter, hitting your head into the corner of the table in the process.

Frightened by the unusual banging, your next-door neighbor went to check on you, and after you didn’t answer the door, she used the spare key to let herself in. Jimin’s number was the first one she called when she found you unconscious in the kitchen.

Jimin raced the ambulance to get to your house and then accompanied the paramedics with your body to the hospital. Apparently, the concussion you’ve suffered was major, which is why, in order to avoid further damage to your brain, the doctors had to induce a medical coma.

You were supposed to wake up from it soon, and yet you didn’t. This complication lead to serious heartbreak for Jimin, who never let go of your hand.

Finally, when it seemed to him like he’d cried all of his tears, he saw you attempt to open your eyes.

“Y/n?” he whispered, his voice hoarse from all the crying. “Y/n, baby, I’m right here.”

Your eyes finally opened and you took in your surroundings. Immediately your eyes landed on your hand in Jimin’s. Confused, you tried to get it out, but your movements were still limited, and Jimin, not understanding, held onto your hand tighter.

“Can you hear me?” he asked.

Your eyes were filled with fear when you looked at him.

“L-let go of my hand,” you whispered in a low voice.

Jimin obeyed, looking back at you with just as much horror. “Jagi, what’s wrong? Do you want me to call the doctor?”

“Yes,” you said. “I-I don’t know who you are, but p-please call my family.”

“You d-don’t know who I am?” Jimin stuttered, taken aback by your statement.

He couldn’t tell if he was more heartbroken or terrified because of your apparent memory loss. Either way, now that you were awake, he wasn’t going to let you out of his sight, whether you remembered him or not. He’d put his own pain away in order to help you to remember.


V

Originally posted by chokaivlicious

The tears haven’t stopped coming ever since he saw your unconscious body in the hospital after he received a call from your parents. You had left the dorms after getting into a fight with him and told him you’d be driving to your parents for a while, but you didn’t make it. You suffered a head-on collision with another vehicle halfway there.

Taehyung knew that the driver of the other car died instantly, and the thought of losing you too was too much for him to handle.

He camped out at your hospital, doing research about people in comas, trying to figure out a way to help you come back to him. He talked to every neurosurgeon in the city and befriended every nurse in your hospital. He was getting sick of their sorry looks, though, so he just prayed every night for you to finally wake up.

And then one day you did. He didn’t even notice it at first, since he was on his laptop, reading another article about the consequences of head-on collisions. He glanced at you momentarily and then did a double-take after noticing that your eyes were open.

He nearly dropped the laptop to the floor in surprise. “Y-Y/n?”

“Am I in the hospital?” you asked quietly, your throat hurting with every word.

“Yes,” Taehyung nodded enthusiastically and proceeded to explain everything that happened with excruciating detail.

“So, you’re my boyfriend,” you concluded after his story.

Taehyung’s face fell. “I… yes. You don’t remember me?”

“I don’t remember anything,” you confessed. “I’m sorry.”

His heart started to beat faster at this news. But he did too much research about patients in a coma to give up on you just like that.

“I’ll help you remember,” he promised, taking your hand into his. “I’ll be with you every step of the way.”


Jungkook

Originally posted by jungkookfortunekookies

Jungkook didn’t realize how upset you were when you left your shared apartment. He thought the fight was blown out of proportion and was already gathering the courage to call you and apologize when he saw your name on the caller’s ID on his phone.

He picked up immediately. “Y/n? Where are you? I’ll come get—”

“Is this Jungkook?” an unknown female voice asked.

“It is,” he answered, a little confused.

“I’m a paramedic. There’s been an accident. We found a girl who had suffered several injuries. She’s being taken to a hospital right now. Your number was the last one dialed on her phone,” the woman explained.

Jungkook’s heart skipped a beat. Actually, it skipped multiple beats. In fact, after the conversation with the paramedic was over, he wasn’t sure if his heart was beating at all.

Blaming himself for what happened, he hurried to the hospital, only to find out that you were in a coma and the doctors weren’t sure when you’d wake up.

Endless days of pain and sorrow followed. Jungkook tried to be the beacon of hope for your family who were seriously shaken up about this, but whenever he was left alone, he broke down in tears.

When you had finally opened your eyes a month later, he felt as if everything he prayed for finally came true.

“Y/n, I love you so much,” he whispered, feeling tears of joy sting his eyes.

“C-can you call the d-doctor?” you stuttered slowly.

“Yes, of course!” he jumped up to his feet to the emergency button next to your bed. “I’ll do anything for you, jagi. What’s wrong?”

“I d-don’t remember anything,” you said.

A smile disappeared from his face. “You don’t remember anything? Not even me?”

“No,” you whispered, scared of the fact that this stranger in front of you seemed to care deeply for you and you couldn’t even remember who he was.

Jungkook’s heart broke all over again. A few seconds ago, he felt as though he finally got you back. And now he realized that despite you breathing and talking on your own, you weren’t back to him at all.


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An Open Letter to All Puppies With Parvo Virus (That Were Unvaccinated)

Dear Adorable Fluffs,

I’m sorry.

I’m sorry that you don’t understand what is happening to you.

I’m sorry we have to poke and prod you every little bit so we can make sure you stay alive and get the treatment you need.

I’m sorry that your intestines is literally and continuously sloughing unto the puppy pad diapers that you are surrounded by.

I’m sorry I can’t explain to you why we have to draw blood so often or why you are hooked up to so many tubes and fluid lines.

I’m sorry that you feel so crummy that you won’t eat. Puppies should be able to love to eat.

I’m sorry that instead of a bright, hyper puppy you are reduced to being a miserable and dull corpse-like ball of diarrhea. 

I’m sorry that your entire body might begin to shut down and you might go into septic shock.

I’m sorry that even around the clock care might not be good enough.

I’m sorry that even the best medicine might not be good enough.

I’m sorry that even if you walk out of here alive and possibly eventually happy, you had to endure even a single second of this awful, cruel, debilitating disease.

I’m sorry that that this was most likely preventable (Yes, there are exceptions, but they are rare and almost always has a valid reason why the vaccine didn’t work- i.e. didn’t store the vaccine correctly, giving it only once without a booster, expecting it to miraculously work immediately right before or during a pravo infection etc.). 

I’m sorry that your owner didn’t believe in vaccines or that “we just want to give them for money.” (Hint: iF we ACTUALLY were in this career for the money, then why in the absolute world would we give a $20 vaccine when we could refuse to vaccinate and make $1,000-$7,000 ++ on each critical parvo patient that walked in the door?)

I’m sorry that you could have been playing with your siblings and being snuggled as a puppy should but instead I’m trying not to sob I might have to put your tiny, emaciated body into a body bag.


I’m so sorry. You deserve so much better than this.

3

Hello everyone, it’s Mina! I was supposed to do this follow forever when i hit 1k but i got lazy lol (sorry) but now i’m nearly at 1.4k so thought i need to do this asap so here goes! I just want thank you all for following me and for loving my blog! I never imagined having this many followers especially considering how somewhat new this blog is (also since my main which is “quite” old is no where near this follower count) so i’m super duper grateful!!! I’m also sorry if this post messes up your notifications!!   (i just want to generally show my appreciation for each and everyone of you by doing this post!! i love you all and hope you have all the happiness in the world!!)

Please let me know if i missed anyone! I’m super sorry if i did but i will add you! By the way if you didn’t know my main is @kyuhuyn​ cause i know some of you became mutuals on my other blog when i technically followed for this blog (if that makes sense?? lmao)

Also i always say this but i hope you guys would talk to me more!!!! I just want to make more friends on this blog, so feel free hit me up with a ask or message or something! I just want to get to know you all better!! (ngl i’m jealous of people who get like regular asks and have constant interactions with their followers! like how do you do it? where can i get this amount of love? lmao) 

Anyways I hope you all have a splendid day!!! 🙆💞💐❤️

💕 Mutuals (Your blogs are amazing i don’t deserve you to be following me, i mean i’m so trash compared to you all??)

💓 Special People (Thank you so much for being such sweethearts, i even included you if we only spoke like once or twice cause i really appreciate you taking your time to talk to me lolol)

Bold Faves (I admire you and aspire to have a blog like yours )

#

@1hwiy 💕💓 @1ovmx @1sistar @1honeybf @1boba @1aemin @1wice 💕  @1mun💕💓 @1ovenct 💕💓 @1una 💕  @1ov 💕💓  @1onelynights @1softe @1softy @2mojito 💕 @2hyungwon 💕@2ramen @2daehyun💕💓 @2gris @3blush @3aekhyun @32milk @4soju @4wish @50-km @66koi @7yn @99lee @99baek 💕💓  @10jimin💕💓

A - I

@aoca @adorue 💕💓 @amayasaizar @awboyz  💕 @akatskui @ceiun          @cheesebakedrice💕  @cafeahn 💕@chens @cusps💕 @dlwlrna 💕 @doriimer @enxis @eo-nni @flowerflufff 💕 @glossy3r @hyuns@honeymatcha @honeywands @ha-roro @haniue  @icedthaitea @iilyhee💕  @ilyoonqi💕 @in1uv @imsamuelsgf💕 @ilucafe 💕  @inhibitionbby

J - R

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Broken {Part 01}

Bucky x Reader (Soulmate!AU)
Summary: The day Bucky returned from Wakanda changed your life forever. Upon finally meeting the man formerly known as the Winter Soldier, your watch reached 00:00:00 and you came to realization that you’d finally met the man you were meant to spend the rest of your life with. But what are you supposed to do when he doesn’t feel the same?

Prompt: The soulmate clock is actually something breakable and you accidentally break yours or vice versa (taken from this post).

Word Count: 1963
Warnings: angst but also eventual fluff, I promise.

Masterlist 

Originally posted by veronikaphoenix

A/N: Honestly, i feel like this could have been written so much better but also i’ve had the nastiest writer’s block and this is the best i’ve got to show after a month of writing rip sorry guys but i still hope you enjoy! 


The tower had an unusual nervousness about it when you awoke that morning. 

FRIDAY was uncommonly silent and the rooms and halls felt large and empty, the usual bustle of friends and staff gone. Tony had called for all meetings and tests to be cancelled, everyone already overwhelmed with the flood of visitors you were to be expecting that day. 

Of course, the majority of those visitors had been assigned to you. No matter the occasion, you just never caught a break.

But the nervous energy filling the tower was suffocating and you couldn’t help but fiddle with the ring on your finger – something Steve had bought you last Christmas for just that purpose – as you walked towards the livingroom. 

Things weren’t much better when you arrived. Tony was uncharacteristically quiet as well, pacing across the living room as Rhodey watched from his seat by the couch. Nat and Sam sat just as silent and anxious at the kitchen counter, throwing you a small smile but much appreciated smile when you entered.

You hated the sudden changes in behaviour but knew that it was to be expected because today was the day that Bucky Barnes returned.

You’d never met the man before and your friends hadn’t seen him in over two years, the last time being shortly before he’d been put in cyro. While things hadn’t ended on the most stellar note, everyone had put it behind them and they were  was happy, albeit a little bit anxious, to have him back.

You, however, were behaving oddly for an entirely different reason.

It wasn’t because you were the only one to have never met the man before and it wasn’t because in just an hour you were to face a roomful of new recruits (although both were good reasons).

It was because the small inked clock on your arm was nearly at its end; in just under an hour the digits on your skin would finally read 00:00:00.

You were going to meet your soulmate.

Keep reading

Star Above the Waters.

TW: major depictions of suicide and suicidal thoughts, major character death.

The icy cold drops of rain pierce deep into Lance’s tear strewn cheeks, pale with cold as he shivered. It was like little needles flecking his skin and leaving him numb and frigid.

Above him, storm clouds cracked and thundered and rolled, making a symphony of Mother Nature’s deadly desire.

Somewhere in front of him, the sky lit up with light like a match in a dark room, only now it was a lighting strike as it buried itself and made its mark somewhere in the world.

Good for it. It left a lasting impression when it was gone. Something Lance would never be able to accomplish.

He had tried countless times.

Either to be noticed, to be popular, to exist in the eyes of people who weren’t apart of his routine life.

He went to whatever lengths he could, tried to stay out of any negative situation.

Lance was always a people pleaser. He always did his very best to make sure everyone he encountered was left with something good to say about him when he was gone.

But any good start with anyone, would only crumble to bad in some way and have him in ruins. Failure.

It seemed like other people could do it just fine. They could be just like Lance and yet they would be the one to rise up in the world, while he was only sinking lower.

Literally and mentally.

Over the past few weeks Lance had got to thinking pretty hard about life. Not about how to go forward with it, what he could make of it, or even what he had planned in life as it went on.

Lance thought more so on the side of ending it. Which, in that way, could be counted as the same as making it better.

Or at least that’s how Lance saw it.

He’d been looking at the possibilities for weeks, like a kid in the candy store. Any way to get out of the world that he couldn’t stand up in, only put deeper and deeper into a hole that the people around him were digging for him.

In all honesty, maybe he had a shovel himself, but that had only been for a little while. It was a small shovel.

Hanging was out of the question. He read too many history books and seen too many movies to know that if it’s done with the slightest flaw, it won’t be easy.

You have to take in people’s height and weight, and the way the noose is tied in relativity to it all.

He would leave the math to Pidge.

Second option had been using those skills with a firearm that he had. But in all honesty that was too messy and he didn’t like the idea of risking it not going right, distorting his face for the rest of his life.

Although he knew the proper way was to put the shotgun directly behind his ear, he didn’t want to wimp out at something only he could control. Pull the trigger or not, there’s too much room for mind changing.

Lance had already tried pills. But he had already been on so many medications to numb the race of his heart, the workings of his mind, all the boy had gotten in return was a nice euphoria for a few hours.

The stomach pumping afterward wasn’t as pleasant, so again there is too much room for flaw. It needed to be just right.

So here he was.
Standing atop this mere ledge as the thing he loved most fell down around him.

You may be thinking that there is too much chance of let go or not let go, fall or not fall, in this scenario.

But that’s why he chose today of all days.
This ledge of all ledges. It was perfect.

Below the 3 ½ inch strip of concrete his feet balanced on, roared the sea. Lance had always loved the water.

A lighthouse. Dark. 5 pm.

Lance had learn most suicides happened between the times of noon and six in the evening, so why not just blend in with the crowd, since he could never stand out in it?

It was about 230 feet tall from the water, and here Lance stood at 198 feet above.

The boy closed his eyes, which were warm with tears but the rain made his skin cold. He felt a swaying motion, and he could hear his heartbeat in his ears.

Everything has an expiration date, whether human or animal or thing.

Nothing doesn’t not come to an end.

It can be chosen by you or for you.
Expected or unexpected.

A thought came to his head, standing hundreds of feet above the water that would soon become one with him and finalize his expiration date.

Lance had always tried to stand out, take risks, try and be noticed and try to be civil.

How come he lived in a world where ‘Take A Life’ was something all you had to do was turn on the television to hear. A social norm almost, something sad, but no you don’t really try and think about it that much.

But ‘Take A Chance’? How is it fair that it seems almost impossible, scary even. Frowned upon, because why would you do that?

What sort of world was that?

Lance lifted on hand from the hold behind him, wiping his cheeks. If he lifted the other, he would fall.

He leaned forward, his free hand swaying at his side as he stared at the back of his eyelids. That questioned repeated itself.

What kind of world is that?

Lance shook his head with a low chuckle, a sad sound that made it past his lips but was then snatched away by the wind.

A tired voice muttered, “Not the kind I want to live in.” With those words, Lance let go.

That wasn’t Lance.
None of them would believe that it was Lance, because how could it be?

It was held in a splayed out position, head back and mouth open, eyes closed.

It’s body was on the verge of turning blue, and had already bloated. It must have been there for hours.

It was dead. A dead, blue thing.

And even though it wore the same clothes, they all refused to believe it was the happy Cuban boy they had come to love and care for, even if he annoyed them sometimes.

They’d gone looking for him after he hadn’t shown up for dinner, and wasn’t back by ten at night.

Keith suggested they go out with flashlights.

Pidge who said wait a little longer.

Shiro who said he’d wait and see if he came back while they were out.

Hunk who found the note on Lances desk.
Shiro who read it out loud, and ran.
Pidge is the one who found it.

The body.

And it was Lance who was dead.

‘I knew someday I’d probably have to write a will or something, you know that thing old people write and families break over.

But I guess I didn’t know I’d be writing my own suicide note. Things had been pretty okay for me as a child.

I wanted to go to space, or become a marine biologist. Stars and water, either one was perfect for me because I loved them both.

Maybe I should say I’m sorry, because that’s what everyone else writes, but I’m not going to.

It would be like saying sorry for the milk expiring, or the toy that broke. I’m just another thing that had an end coming.

We all do.
But I’m not sorry.

I got to see the water, be apart of it, and I know I probably won’t look very pretty when you find me but I didn’t bother to put any makeup on when I woke up for the last time this morning.

Don’t worry, if you look up at night, I’ll look so much better as a star. Among those that I had always wanted to see.

Pidge, you’re such a strong woman and you’re smarter than I could have ever been. When you invent a code that makes memories a reality, please don’t forget about me by then and visit the good ones we had, okay?

Keith, at least from up here I can look down on your mullet, and pretend it looks a lot better than it actually is. Also, do me a favor and make sure Hunk is okay after this. You two seem close to an extent, he is going to need someone to go to. ((If he makes you something to eat, EAT IT.))

Hunk, thank you so much for being my best friend and my brother for all of these years. You’re a good bro, and I’ll make sure to put a good word in up here for you so you can be the Big Guy’s head chef. (Only if I get some snacks though.) I’m trusting you to keep Pidge in check, and make sure you feed those little mice in the shed. I love you.

Shiro, please please watch them all for me. And take care of yourself. I know you’ve been through a lot and I’m not helping any, but use them as your support and you as theirs. It’s okay to need someone, everyone needs another. Just make sure they have you, and each other, because I don’t want any of you to end up like me. Stay rad, space Dad.

I don’t care what you do with me, but whatever you do I want to be by the ocean. My final final resting place. Spread my ashes, bury my grave. Just make sure they play Beyoncé at the funeral.

You guys are out of this world.
See you later.

~ Lancey Lance