Do you really think now is the best time for a canoeing trip?
Of course. I know how important it is to you. That's why we constantly mention our plans to go canoeing. Not a day goes by that we don't curse the newest villain for trying to destroy the town because it delays our chance to canoe.
When have we ever talked about canoeing?
This might be our only chance to go off and do this before Gideon regroups and attacks me again.
Was the canoeing trip even my idea?
Let's go make one last memory as mother and son before the forces of evil attack again and the show remembers that I'm the main character.
Oh! This is a plot dodging trip.
Obviously. And it would work a lot better if you played along.
You're still bringing your gun in case Gideon decides to poof in and attack us on the river though, right?
This is the Supernatural/Destiel fancomic I was working on. I guess I’m never going to finish this. I am so sorry (It looks cool tho now I’m looking at it again after some months of almost not drawing)
The second Gideon’s feet touched the water he started screaming and a quite flustered Belle pulled him back up again, setting him on her hip. Storybrooke’s indoor community pool had advertised for toddler swimming lessons and she had jumped at the opportunity to sign him up. Even though she was excited, her husband had held back. When she had questioned why, he had narrowed his eyes at her.
“You don’t have bath duty, Belle,” he said, “He’s terrified of water.”
“Then that’s even more of a reason to sign him up,” she had snapped back.
“To torture him?”
“No, to make him get over his fear.”
“He’s a toddler, Belle!”
This had led to a very lengthy argument that allowed their son time unsupervised to make the living room a complete mess and they both cleaned up the toys in a stewing silence. The next day, she went out and bought a pretty blue bikini for herself and small swimming trunks for Gideon. Rumple had not been happy. As she recalled the memory she looked to where Rumple sat at the poolside. Although it was humid in the large room, he was still wearing his three-piece suit and had not bothered to take off his over coat. It was fanned out, draping gracefully over the sides of the plastic lounge chair. His hands were folded over his stomach and his eyes, which Belle knew were observing her fail, were hidden behind round sunglasses.
Gideon was staring at the water, his imagination running wild. Sharks, water serpents, those nymphs Mama had read him a story about, and mermaids. Anything could be hiding in that deceptively clear water, and the toddler wasn’t having it.
Ready for another try, Belle lowered herself to the concrete pool side, letting her legs dip into the water. She shifted Gideon so he was on her lap. His brown eyes, ones identical to those she could feel watching her from the plastic chair.
“Alright, Gideon,” Belle said softly, “let’s try this again.” Gideon, who thought his mother would have gotten the message from his previous scream, was very surprised when he suddenly found the lower half of his body submerged in water.
“No!” He said the word like he was on fire, provoking several strange looks from other people in the pool. Belle brought him back to her lap, hugging him to her, but Gideon knew she was just going to try and do it again, so he struggled against her.
“No,” he said again, this time with more of a whine.
“Gideon,” his mother’s voice held a warning, “your swimming lessons start tomorrow, you have-”
This was new information to the toddler, and not news he liked. Swimming lessons? Did this woman not understand him at all?
With this inner-monologue, he squirmed harder and was able to slip under her arm and away. He was very aware of his mother chasing him, but somehow he managed to stay ahead.
Rumple saw this transpire and felt a small smile appear on his lips. He swung his legs to the side of the lounge chair and grabbed Gideon’s towel; he bent down and spread it out just in time for his son to run into it.
He stood as he picked Gideon up. Belle was close behind, looking like she was ready to fight someone. Rumple kissed his son on the head and the toddler wrapped his arms around his papa’s neck.
“He’s scared of the water, Belle,” Rumple said, voice low and husky, “don’t push it on him.”
Belle, however, had an idea. She moved into him, sliding an arm around her husband’s waist and setting her head gently on his shoulder. She was face to face with her son, whose head was on the other shoulder, and she smiled. She raised a hand and stroked his soft hair.
“Sweetheart,” she said, “would you get in the pool if Papa got in with you?”
She felt Rumple’s whole body go rigid. He was silently praying to whatever deity would listen that his son didn’t like this idea. However, Gideon didn’t hear this prayer and he nodded vigorously, a giant smile stretching his small features.
Mama didn’t any magic, but Papa did. Papa would protect him from the serpents, mermaids, nymphs, what have you….
A grin spread across Belle’s face, “Yeah?”
“Yeah!” Gideon said with so much enthusiasm that Rumple knew his fate had just been sealed.
“Belle, there are people here,” he said, trying to free himself.
The corner of Rumple’s nose twitched, “So, no one wants to see me in swim trunks.”
Belle bit her bottom lip and rose onto her tiptoes, placing a delicate kiss on his cheek, “I do.”
He looked from his wife, who was displaying oddly hungry eyes, to his son, who looked like he was in pain from watching his parents’ affection. Under both of their gazes he melted.
“Alright,” he sighed, “Let’s go buy me a swim suit.”
We’re baaaaack! At last I can leave the anti-rumple tag, which I’ve been in so long I started to get brochures about time shares, and go back to snarking on everyone. Oh, happy day! Let’s dive into that enchanted overnight wardrobe together. Ready?
Someone needs to talk to Emma about her eyebrow situation– she looks perpetually surprised and slightly upset. That’s how most Rumbellers felt all of 6A so I feel you, Emma– but Kabuki Eyebrows are not the look for spring. Change the fate on your face first, yes?
Teen!August looked nothing like either Adult!August or Kid!August but maybe that’s a subtle meta-commentary on unreliable narrators? Discuss.
Kid!Emma looks like she could punch you in the face and I admire that. It’s tough to glare in a beanie, but she’s got it down. I love that she chose her own name, too.
I don’t know why they needed a magic chisel when Pinocchio could just chew the scenery all the way down to Storybrooke. But while I disliked the O.G. bobble-headed liar I really liked Wish!August, daddy issues and all. I even liked that Original!August was typing on the Mystery Fakeout Typewriter in the garage so he wouldn’t wake his Papa. Such a nice boy. I guess this episode was about Redeeming Non-viable Stubbly Love Interests– I’m not sure we needed that, but it was nice to see. (Now, where’s Walsh?)
Wish!August carved a wooden swan (ship name call-out!) out of instinct, and Wish!Robin had his feather and didn’t age (along with Wish!Sheriff Nottingham), implying that there IS a connection between the Wish!realm and the “real” realm. Maybe all Wish!Robins go to heaven?
Wish!Robin is bitter and salty and somehow I liked him better than the real thing. Wish!Robin and Regina had more of a believable connection in this episode than all of S3-5 for me, which just goes to show when you slow down and have people talk to one another instead of just screaming at monsters in the same frame magic can happen.
Regina gets hit with the Anti-magic Slap Bracelet of Convenient Plot-points … but wasn’t that brought to Storybrooke by Greg/Tamara/Peter Pan? How would it appear in the Wish!verse? (Cue Wish!Rumple reading “Circuitry and Plot Holes for Dummies.”)
I know we’re supposed to sympathize that Regina’s super glum that this realm seems to be “better off without her” but, you know, she DID drop a lot of bodies. I want Regina to love herself and re-integrate post-haste because it’s healthy … and also because Split!EvilQueen has killed three people and screwed with Belle. But I am here for Happy!Regina– let’s see more of that this season.
Wish!Hook was there for comedic effect, and it worked for me! Nice to know he’s still got his swagger in this realm; I didn’t even mind the potbelly. What would you rather, a bag of bones?
Speaking of which … So Wish!Snow and Charming never checked Regina’s tower for prisoners, which is why Wish!Belle starved to death along with who knows how many others? This is why Regina is mayor. This is why Regina will ALWAYS be mayor. Remember in S2 when the curse broke and everyone was running around trying to find their loved ones and Charming just gave a speech about hope, when it turned out Regina had binders that scrupulously recorded everyone’s real name, cursed name, and address because she’s a giant nerd who takes her real-life SIMS game seriously? Regina may kill the odd peasant when she’s having a bad day but she’s the Project Manager Storybrooke needs, is what I’m saying.
If Belle was dead for 28 years when Rumple found her skeleton, how did he know it was her? Did Belle claw a goodbye message in the walls before she died? “DEAR RUMPLE SORRY WE NEVER BANGED XOXO BELLE.”
Also, that wasn’t remotely a full skeleton Rumple dropped on the ground. What did he do with the re– you know what? I don’t wanna know. (Note to fic writers: I don’t want to see the words “sad wanking” and “tibia” in the same sentence, okay? O-KAY?)
Gideon wants to be a hero, like his mom, by stabbing someone, like his dad. I love it. Gideon is a tall emo drink of Angsty Monk and I totally would– but where are his lips? #PoofGideonLips2k17
When Rumple had his tete-to-eyes-all-the-way-up-here-tete with Gideon and went: “You’ve been alive for 28 years, I’ve been alive for centuries. There are things a man learns …” I thought for a second it was going to turn into a rather-late-in-the-day explanation of the birds and the bees. “Your mother has written this pamphlet with some of her favorite positions, but you have to be a bit flexible to– wait, where are you going?”
Do you think Belle has her wardrobe categorized by mood? Her white fur coat ensemble was filed under “I’m Trustworthy But I Like to Bang Dangerous People.”
Unless the script read: “RUMPLE sneaks off STAGE LEFT while BELLE awkwardly goose-steps off STAGE RIGHT” the director has some explaining to do. That was the worst example of “walk casual” I’ve ever seen, unless they just had an angsty parental quickie in the alley or something.
Speaking of weird directorial choices, where’s the missing scene between Belle and Gideon? At the well Belle intimates that Hook/Charming “betrayed her trust”– but she just asked them to hold off until she could talk to Gideon. That was during the day and then all of a sudden it’s night, Belle’s changed outfits, she hasn’t talked to Gideon, and she says she “protected [Gideon] knowing what he wanted to do.” Er, was this off-screen? I know a lot of Rumbelle is reading between the lines but sometimes things need to make it in the episode, you guys. Maybe next episode will have a Belle/Gideon conversation and they didn’t want to be too repetitive?
Way to ruin your mom’s clock tower, Gideon! I know some people were mad at Belle for staying on the Jolly Roger in 6A instead of in her library apartment … but do you know how many times the clock tower has been broken into by villains? Maid!Joanna died there, Hook was tied up there, Rumple tried to massacre nuns there, Maleficent was in the basement for 28 years, I think Dark Swan hung out there once … Belle would never get any rest up there, is what I’m saying.
Charming is going off the rails on a sleep-deprived crazy train and I’m here for it. But remember, Snow is the brains of this particular operation. Tag her back in before you drop of exhaustion, yes? No more than three Red Bulls at a time.
I’m all for the message that you can change your fate, but this is intimating the writers are taking “Killing Emma” off the table of options, no? That leaves either depowering-via-shears, sleeping curse until a “cure” is found, or some kind of Hail Mary-Margaret shenanigans in the finale involving a mass-TLK or something. *bites fingernails* I can’t stand the suspense!
Because she loves him. She loves him, you know? She’s not gonna let him control her, or be her “everything”, you fall in love with someone and there’s a commitment there.They made a commitment with their marriage to each other, support and be there together, through ups and downs, through thick and thin. It was made a long time ago, and through all the bad he has done, it’s always been with the guise of protecting her. It’s never been with destruction in mind, or causing harm and pain towards her.