That’s how long it took for him to finally begin to move on.
Three long miserable years that he spent waiting in vain for her.
For her to call him, text him, visit him, anything, just to show that she missed him. That she wanted him as much as he wanted her. That she needed him as much as he needed her.
It was his own personal hell.
He sat on the sidelines and heard about her in the tabloids.
About how she had moved on.
About how she was happier than she had ever been.
About how she wanted nothing to do with him.
And every single time, it was as someone had plunged a knife through his heart and kept twisting it.
Because while he was desperately waiting for her, she was moving on from him.
And then eventually enough was enough.
He decided to stop drinking to drown the sorrows. To stop isolating himself from his friends and family.
He decided it was time to get his shit together and move forward just like she did.
And then suddenly, for the first time in three years, he was happy even without her by his side.
It was as if his acceptance of a life without her opened a door that had been sealed shut.
He spent more time with his dad and the littles since they were growing up so fast.
He went to church more often and he hung out more with Scooter, Kenny, Alfredo and everyone else from my team who knew him and cared about him.
Slowly he realized that he didn’t need Selena to make him happy.
He had enough people in his life that could do that. He just needed to allow them to.
He could make himself happy.
He even managed to fix his relationship with his mother and move forward from the mess he had made.
Life without Selena was different, but it was livable.
Yet still, a small part of him couldn’t help but miss her.
She had been a constant in his life despite everything.
She was not only his first love but also the love of his life. It was something that couldn’t be helped.
She would always be a part of him. He just had to learn to live with that.
And he did.
He had just pulled up in my driveway after a long day in the studio trying to perfect yet another song about Selena.
He got out, locking the car behind him, his body freezing when he saw a silhouette on the front porch.
The moonlight reflected on her brown hair and he realized it was Selena.
“Um hey.” He said hesitantly when he approached her.
“Hi.” She gave a small smile.
“How long have you been here?” He asked, fishing my keys out of my pocket to open the door.
“Okay, well, uh, would you like to come inside?” He offered politely.
What was happening?
Why was she here?
Was this some kind of joke?
He sighed, leading her to the living room.
He didn’t have time for this game. Not anymore.
“So how are you?” Selena questioned when she sat down.
He narrowed his eyes, furrowing his eyebrows.
“Cut the shit Selena. Why are you here?"
Maybe he was being harsh. He didn’t care. She hadn’t been in his presence for more than five minutes and he could already feel the thread unraveling at the seams that held him together.
She would be his undoing. She always was.
She flinched and he immediately felt guilty. He was about to apologize but stopped himself.
He had to stand his ground. He couldn’t do that if he let his guard down.
"Absence makes the heart grow fonder. You never know what you have until it’s gone.”
She blurted two quotes and he almost stopped breathing when he understood their meaning.
“No.” He commanded, rising from the couch. He began to pace, pointing an angry finger in her direction.
“No! You are not doing this to me!"
She quickly stood up, walking closer to him but stopping when he took a step back.
She understood his reservations. She had hurt him. Over and over again.
"I’m not doing anything Justin.” Her soft voice was a stark contrast to his. It was barely audible.
“Yes you are! I thought you didn’t want anything to do with me huh? You ended it! Not me! You said that you couldn’t do that again with me! So why are you here huh? Just when I’m finally getting my life together. Why Selena? Why not when I was suffering without you?”
“I wasn’t ready Justin. I wasn’t ready to open up my heart to you again. I wasn’t ready to be hurt again. But being without you for so long…I just miss you. A lot. And every day I miss you even more. I understand that I can’t recreate what we had. I don’t want to. I just want you back. I want us back. I’m sorry.”
He shook his head. “Well it’s too late now to say sorry.”
She glared at him, her temper beginning to flare.
“What happened to your little promises huh? I’m never letting you go Selena. I’ll wait for you, however long it takes. Well here I am Justin!” She threw his words back at him.
“Why are you hell bent on torturing me?"
“I’m sorry okay? I’m sorry! I know what I said but I can’t do that anymore Selena! That was three years ago! Why did you take so long? I’m finally happy without you. I can finally be on my own without wanting to die. I can’t get back together with you. If I do, I’m going to lose myself completely just like every other time and then when you dump me, like you always do, I’m going to be the one who lost everything. I can’t put myself through that pain again Selena. I won’t. You always used to tell me I had to learn to stop trying to make others happy and put myself first. Well this is me doing just that.”
“Justin no.” She shook her head as her heart broke and her hopes fell. “I’m sorry okay? But it’s not going to be like that again. I’m not going to leave you.”
“I’m sorry Selena, but the answer is no.”
“Do you still love me?” She pleaded.
“I do.” He whispered softly, his sad hazel eyes gazing into hers. He reached out, cupping her face in his hand and using his thumb to wipe away her years. “I love you more than ever. But this is me loving myself Sel. Please understand that.”
She closed her eyes, relishing in the feel of his touch, knowing it wouldn’t last much longer.
“Can-” She cleared her throat. “Can I hug you? One final time?”
He nodded, wrapping his arms around her and holding her tightly.
“I’m sorry Selena. I don’t want to hurt you but I really can’t do this to myself.”
She breathed a sigh, pressing herself closer to him.
She unwillingly pulled away. “I guess I’ll get going.”
He gave her a sad smile. “Bye.”
“Bye.” She walked to his door, stopping to whisper three words before she slipped away into the Californian night.
“I love you.”
He stood in silence as the sound of her voice echoed through his head, wondering if he had done the right thing by letting her go.
seriously the fact of the matter is the fans don’t care about their happiness because they’re fucking greedy. he wants to be with Gomez, they fuck it up because she can’t handle the fucking hate! she wants to be with Justin but wants it to be private. he goes out with other girls purposely to see how the fans react. they fucking love it and preach “he’s happy. leave them be. she’s got my respect” or “your hurting Selena leave her” you all say these girls got your respect because they moved out of the way so he could take photos with fans what exactly did you expect them to do honestly? Selena has bent the fuck over backwards for 4 god damn years. she’s never been mean to them in fact she defended them saying she felt the same way about Jesse McCartney’s girlfriend back then, she’s snuck some Beliebers in concerts, when they were rude to her she killed them with kindness, she sung on stage during Justin’s concert despite how the fans treated her and so he did the same at her concert. but when she shaded his ass one mother fucking time “she’s a bitch. I hate her” “she ruined justin” “she shaded him that’s why I hate her” like you all haven’t shaded somebody once. he shaded her, she shaded him. they both fucking moved past it. so its time for everybody to build a fucking bridge cry about it and get over it. the fans DONT own him or her and NEVER will. they want him with people he’s made famous just because by being around him. they want her to move on. he loves Selena and has for 4 fucking years he NEVER made her famous. she loves Justin NOT “international pop sensation Justin Bieber” she worked her ass off for her fucking fans just like he did. she defended him in court has NEVER left his side and has stuck everything out because they obviously love each other. they can’t give up on each other because they have so much history and something is holding them together whether you agree or not THEY make each other really HAPPY. the stories made up on either are such bullshit and I judge you if you believe them. they have gone through hell and back and have came out stronger than ever. the fans need to get over it because if Justin wants Selena then dammit he’s gonna be with her. if Selena wants to be with Justin she’s going to be nobody can stop them. he’s 20 not 10. she’s going on 22. they aren’t going to be taking relationship advice from people who have NEVER experienced love. plain and simple. you all want them happy than stop the bullshit excuses of how she made him cry, guarantee he made her cry or how he’s going to break her heart because in all honesty nobody knows that and stop with the fucking bullshit ships if he wants nobody other than Selena Marie Gomez he isn’t going to leave her because you don’t like her plain and simple. she isn’t going to leave him because you think he’s a bad influence its their love life NOT yours. so let me say this clearly once more. ITS THEIR LOVE LIFE NOT YOURS SO BUT THE FUCK OUT! *drops mic*
- property of youarenoughbelieveit
Oh cause all of the downs and the uppers
Keep making love to each other
And I’m trying, I’m trying, I’m trying, I’m trying
All of the downs and the uppers
Keep making love to each other
And I’m trying, I’m trying, I’m trying, I’m trying, but
Is it too late now to say sorry?
Cause I’m missing more than just your body, hey
Is it too late now to say sorry?
Yeah I know, I know that I let you down
Is it too late to say I’m sorry now?
I’m sorry yeah
“Catch up!” Selena laughed, taking off down the sandy trail.
Justin watched from afar, shielding his eyes from the glaring sun. Her laughter warmed him. He was hit with a heat wave and reached for the nearly empty water bottle laying on the sidewalk. “Wait up, baby,” he called out.
“Nope.” Her pace slowed just enough that she could walk backwards. “Come and get me.”
He sighed, wiping his forehead with the back of his hand. “I guess you win.” Feigning defeat, he slightly turned to the side, nodding to his bodyguard. Music filled the air and Justin faced her once more. He swayed side to side, moving in an awkward string of dance moves that could only be described as chaotic.
“Oh..,” she sighed, covering her face. “Justin, what are you doing?”
“What’s that? Want me to sing along?” He smirked, belting out the lyrics as his shuffling became more erratic and whimsical. “Come back over here, Sel!”
She threw her body forward, shrinking her arms in. “Justin!” His name was interrupted by breathy laughter. “Quit it! People are staring!”
“Well if you wouldn’t run off we wouldn’t have this problem,” he berated, jogging the last few feet between them. “I still want my kiss, you promised me one when we got out of the car.” He puckered his lips, locking his arms around her waist; a boa trapping its prey.
“Hm,” she squinted against the sun, “Doesn’t ring a bell.”
“I remember it quite clearly.” His grip tightened, forcing her closer.
She gasped, slinging her arms around his bare shoulders. “Alright, alright!” She tilted her head, pressing her lips to his cheek. “Better?”
“That’s all I get?” He squeezed her sides, eliciting surprised squeals from her. He laughed, dropping his head forward. Their noses bumped and he caught her bottom lip between his, carefully dipping her and applying more pressure.
His pulse quickened and her breathing caught, almost like it had become entangled in a string that was pulled taut. He felt wildfires in his veins and she felt a Pacific wave hit her at light speed. One of his hands migrated north, resting at the base of her neck.
She mumbled some incoherent sound and he inhaled her words, pulling back just to make sure she was alright. He kissed her again, two, three times, and released her from his grip, studying her flushed cheeks.