sorry it doesn't look all that great

what sucks is that around my family I will go days without smiling, having emotion, and will look like a beat up tired shit and they don’t say anything. they literally don’t notice shit and all summer I was in my room talking to one person(but that person is great just saying) and I constantly looked like shit (bags under my eyes, dry ass skin, chapped lips, wearing bum clothes) I was like this for like 3 months and they literally didn’t think anything of it, I’m still like this but I have to go to school so I seem more normal or whatever, it just shows how they don’t care and realize anything worth shit.

One day my dad came home from work and he opened my door and thought I was crying (I wasn’t tho) cuz I wiped my eyes and he asked “are you okay?” And all I said was “yea” and he was like “okay” and then left It’s so fucking stupid, even the fact tht he would actually expect that I would simply say “well turns out I have depression and social anxiety! And that dying sounds like heaven compared to living!” My parents don’t actually care and are so clueless, it’s like my dad thinks that as long as he asks how someone’s doing then he’s done something good in the world or whatever the shit.