sorry i dont feel comfortable posting one

anonymous asked:

Sorry i did not mean to be rude

i mean its fine, i just want people to understand that THIS is my art platform. i dont post just because “i wanna get noticed as much as possible!1!1!1 i need an account for everything!1!” no thats not me. i post because i want people to be happy. its about quality, not quantity. (note im not saying this is what you think, im just explaining myself).

My deepest apologies

it has certainly been a long while since the last time I typed something in this website. It feels weird.

I’m really sorry but, I’m not coming back to tumblr, this will be my last post here, and I really need it to be for something important.

You have seen my many suicide attempts, my depressive and anxious behaviours, and you have also seen me doing things that werent the best to do. The things I drew/reblogged in my old enciowhy porn blog were things I saw other people draw, and liked, but didnt think too much about how it is seen by the majority of people (AKA, the bestiality porn, fin///nxjak////e, also the pe////wey fanart I drew in my old main floredoodler) I dont remember what else I did.. it was a lot of time ago.. on 2015 . I shouldnt have been so childish when replying to what people told me i was doing wrong, I should have been more responsible and I should have aknowledged what I did.. I didnt do these thought because I didnt know how, and i might have made excuses once, twice or more times. I realize I tried to run away from problems by remaking my blog. I did that twice i think.

I’d like to tell you that I have changed. Back in the day I didnt really have clear what is bad and what is good. Now I know. I will not draw certain things, because they’re not ok..

(I just noticed I might be sounding repetitive but its mostly because I still dont know how to fully express myself in words, but I do know how to express myself better than before.)

I’d really love to say sorry for doing the things I did. I apologize for making you cry whenever I posted suicide notes, and I want to apologize for drawing hurtful content.

I wish I could have a way to let you all see how sorry I am.. this is my only way to do it.

Also, for the ones who support me, I want to apologize for leaving tumblr. I dont feel comfortable being here. I will always be in a negative place in some people’s minds.. I will always be lesbophobic/transphobic/racist/pedophile for at least 1 person, and I cant change that.. I understand that if Someone becomes known, there will inevitably be people who hates them. I just am not used to hate (I grew up with it but Im not over it, and I dont consider myself strong enough to be around people who hates me)

Thank you for reading! I hope you understand that I never meant to harm anybody, ever. Its ok if you dont want to believe me tho, its up to you. I did what I had to do (accept my mistakes and learn from them)

If I excluded something you can point it out by commenting it and Ill to explain it and apologize too.

hey, um, is it ok if i confess something? this isnt easy to say, and ill try to say it as nicely as possible, but… the fact that a lot of ‘tumblr user x [insert skelebae here]’ ships have become so popular and widely accepted recently has made me feel rather… depressed. i have absolutely nothing against you or other people being shipped or anyone that wants to ship anything. in fact, i think you’re all very cool and neat people, and i admire you very much! but for me personally, its gotten to the point where i dont even look forward to reading new imagines/headcanons anymore; not just on here, but on any blog. whenever i do, i just feel intense guilt because its like the skeletons i love are already in a relationship with someone else, so i feel like im not “allowed” to be in love with them and enjoy new posts anymore… and then i hate myself just a little more because its like im inadequate; i dont “meet the standards”, so to speak. im really sorry that this message is so long and on anon, but i wanted this to be shown, in case someone else out there is going through the same thing i am. thanks for taking the time to read this.

—-

First off, I want to thank you for your confession! This is a safe place and I want everyone to feel welcome and comfortable here. 

There’s no such thing as “one skeleton” that all of us has to share. No one really owns them, except their creators. Everyone has their own versions of these characters that rightfully belong to them. Shipping ourselves with our favorite skeletons shouldn’t be causing harm to anyone and it’s purely out of self indulgence, to make ourselves feel better and happy. 

I’m sorry that it’s making you depressed and if after I reply to this message, you want to unfollow all headcanon blogs, then that’s your call, but you’re very much allowed to love your own skeleton. 

If you want to go into theoretical terms, there are an infinite amount of different versions of the skeleton to choose from because of the multiverse theory. For example, someone else’s of SF Papyrus, could be completely different from my “Rus”, even if they are both Swapfell Papyruses. 

At the end of the day, these are all just fictional characters and shouldn’t be taken seriously. Have fun at with them, because they’re fake and meant for entertainment, not to make you feel bad. 

2

Kim Yongsun. You have no idea how much you comfort us. I’d be having a bad day but watching you cheered me up. I’d be on the verge of killing myself but those thoughts go away after watching you. You help me fight through this, when no one else does. I’m sure a lot of other fans are comforted by you too in whichever way. So don’t be sorry, because you cheer us up as well. We’re helping each other. You yeba.

anonymous asked:

im super super sorry if this is rude to ask but, can we see pictures of you? youre really cute and bubbly and your voice is amazing, and im just curious. you ofc dont have to if youre not comfortable, i dont want to stress you out or anything.

lol anon that is not rude at all ^_^

I have posted selfies before on tumblr, and I have one or two on my instagram

But here’s one of me and my cat puff!

feel free to ignore the COD poster in the background.

Have an amazing day anon and thanks for the sweet message ^_^

2

i wanted to make another post…

but, on the right is myself about a year ago. i was struggling with gender dysphoria, when i had no idea it was the feeling i was experiencing. i don’t think i was EVER okay with identifying as a girl. last year, i had hit rock bottom, and im still recovering, because of my gender dysphoria and confusion. but in june of 2014, i finally figured out that i wasn’t cisgender, but that i was transgender. i felt so much more satisfied with myself. although i’m still closeted to many people in person, i have no problem dressing as i want to. i dont have a problem with being myself anymore. im convinced my identity is real, and i’m so happy that so many lovely faces on my dashboard feel the same way. coming out to my friends was one of the hardest things i’ve ever accomplished, but i did it. i feel much more comfortable and happy now.

happy trans day of visibility! your identity is valid, no matter what! (they/he)