sorry dad

im dying of period cramps on the sofa and i heard someone in the kitchen and assumed it was my mom so i yelled I CAN FEEL MY UTERUS PULSING HELP and my dad came into the room with the most horrified expression on his face

so i wanted my dad to read the fault in our stars and he finished it in 2 days. today (one day after he finished) my mom came up to me like ‘yesterday in the middle of the night your dad crawled in bed crying and murmuring “she only makes me read these sad books why” and went to sleep’ and now my life is complete.