Oooo I love this song and it’s so??? Wonderful for this pairing, thank you thank you for this request!!
Kit belongs to @botany-enthused-vampire and I simply borrowed her
Dancing Series #10
Song: F**ckin Perfect by P!nk
Saeran doesn’t do much with music outside of therapy. He likes it, loves playing the drums and the guitar and even singing, but he lacks the courage to do anything where anyone can hear or see him outside of Kit. Maybe it’s because she’s the one who introduced him to it, or maybe it’s just the calmness she exudes when working with him but he’s never really felt self-conscious around her.
Which is why what he’s about to do is working at his nerves like there’s no tomorrow.
Exhaling slowly, he makes one more round of Yoosung’s apartment to make sure everything is how he wants it. Tape with a note over the light switch so it won’t be turned on? Check. Candles lining a pathway to the small kitchen? Check. Flower petals in the pathway along with a bouquet on the table? Check. Food cooked and in the oven to stay warm? Check. His hair and face and general appearance presentable? …check, hopefully. He’s not wearing anything out of the ordinary, really, just that pair of black skinny jeans Yoosung always comments on and the MCR tour shirt Yoosung had found on iBay and given him for his birthday. Oh, and the choker is the one Yoosung gave him for Christmas that has their names inscribed on the inside like the big dork he is.
Still. It’s an outfit put together with a meaning behind it.
The stool Saeran dragged with him is sitting in the middle of the kitchen, the table shoved off to the side against the wall so that he can be seen - even if that’s literally the last thing he wants right now, he knows it’s what’s needed.
He’s just taking his seat and pulling the guitar up on his lap when he hears the front door click and a soft, confused noise that never fails to bring a smile to his lips. All of Yoosung’s noises are cute. He loves every single one of them, just like he loves Yoosung.
But lately Yoosung seems to have trouble remembering that.
There’s a soft plop of what he assumes is Yoosung’s school bag and then the soft padding of feet before a familiar face enters the room, eyes scoping out the decor and settling on Saeran right as he begins to strum.
For a moment, his throat constricts and his fingers seize up and he can’t help but think well, this is it, I’m dying, before Yoosung gasps out his name, somehow shocking him into action and he continues. There’s already tears in those beautiful eyes, a hand covering the mouth he plans to kiss later.
Deep breath. In, out. He can do this.
Made a wrong turn, once or twice.
Dug my way out, blood and fire.
Bad decisions, that’s alright.
Welcome to my silly life-
It’s been a tough month, one where Yoosung’s schoolwork seemingly has not only doubled but increased in how hard it is, and he’s been struggling to keep up with that and his shifts at the clinic. It’s not new that Yoosung has self-esteem issues, but they’d almost seemed resolved when he’d made his decision to fix his life and focus on school again.
Mistreated, misplaced misunderstood,
It didn’t slow me down.
There was a test a few weeks ago that he’d barely scraped by on despite all of his hard work and that had beaten him into the ground. Saeran nearly drug him to the therapist early just to get him some help, but in the end Yoosung had picked himself back up, his smile shaky but still there.
Mistaken, always second guessing,
Look, I’m still around…
Then there had been an accident at the clinic, and somehow the responsibility to make a decision fell on Yoosung’s shoulders. The dog didn’t survive. From what Saeran understands, it wasn’t Yoosung’s fault - it was too late anyway, but Yoosung refuses to accept anything else. Every night he cries in the shower, thinking Saeran can’t hear him. He’s been losing weight, staying up gaming again.
Well, Saeran might not be worth much but he’s not about to let his boyfriend go down in flames. Not if he can help it.
Pretty pretty please, don’t you ever ever feel,
Like you’re less than fucking perfect.
Pretty pretty please, if you ever ever feel,
Like you’re nothing, you’re fucking perfect to me.
Both hands have moved up to cover Yoosung’s mouth and he’s openly crying, the tears flowing down in a river that if he were not singing, Saeran would be doing his best to kiss away. But there’s a point to what he’s doing; to this song, to him singing to him, to doing all of this.
Yoosung’s been talking like he’s worth nothing, like he should just give up. That no one should bother caring for him because he’s just a waste of breath. He’s been acting like he doesn’t believe Saeran when he says he loves him, and like he thinks everyone is lying when they say they want what’s best for him.
That will not do.
You’re so mean, when you talk
About yourself. You are wrong.
Change the voices, in your head.
Make them like you instead.
The rest of the song passes like that, with Saeran holding himself back from rushing forward and Yoosung gradually lowering himself to kneel on the floor before him, tears falling freely. Towards the end he places his cheek on Saeran’s knee and clutches his calf, and Saeran can tell he’s letting out every pent up negative emotion he’s been carrying around for too long now.
A good cry has been needed.
Setting the guitar aside, Saeran leans forward and tips Yoosung’s chin up, looking down at him with an affectionate smile. “Hey puppy, I love you. And I meant every single fucking thing that I just sang to you.”
“Thank you.” Yoosung’s voice is hoarse, but the emotion behind those two words is very audible. Standing, he wraps his arms around Saeran and buries his face in his shoulder, still sobbing. “Thank you. Thank you so much, Saeran, I-I… thank you.”
Have you heard any of the souls series songs that Vaatividya commissioned? Specifically "Hollow" or "The End"? I feel those fit rather well. "Hollow" talks about the story of Anri and Horace's fall and how the ashen one regrets his choices, restarting the journey to save them. And "The End" goes over the story of DS2 and how the bearer of the curse got to dranglic, the pain she and others faced will not be in vain, and how she will fight for an end.
I have. Vaati commisions some very expressive and story laden stuff.
Song Series! > Please give me some feedback on this, been debating posting it for like two days. Let me know if you liked it.
He met Y/n when they were young kids. He knew from the instant that he met her that she was gonna be the most special person in his life. The way her smile could make his day go from shit to kind of okay. She gets to him in ways no one else can.
She been my queen, Since we were sixteen, We want the same things, We dream the same dreams
“You ready?” She asks walking out of their shared bedroom.
She’s in a black rock tee shirt, dark blue flare jeans, hair teased and curled, make up done.
He locks eyes with her for a second and smiles, her returning the favor.
“Yeah, you look amazing babe.” He places a small kiss on her forehead.
“Thanks, you look great too.” She says, unbuttoning that top button on his shirt. He tenses at her touch. Goosebumps rising on his skin as if he’s cold, but it’s 80 degrees out.
They were headed out to a Nick Jonas concert, meeting a few of his buddies there. He got tickets from the label, and they get to go back stage to see him after the show.
Nick and Shawn are friends, have been since they met through the label. It’s a unspoken agreement to support the others on the label. They’ve worked together for a brief time, when they happened to be in the same place at the same time.
She’s never gotten to meet Nick, she met Demi a few months back at an award show, but she didn’t get to meet Nick. She’s screaming on the inside, she’s a huge Nick fan. Has been since she was a kid and watched his shows on The Disney Channel.
She’s trembling with excitement when they are walking to their seats, meeting up with Shawn’s friends and their girlfriends.
“Y/n looks like she is about to pass out.” Mike jokes as the lights start to dim.
“Shut up, I’m the biggest Nick fan.” She says over the bass that starts blaring though the old speakers. The floor starts to shake and the screaming gets louder. The lights are flashing making their senses act up.
Shawn watches her, watches as she sings along to the songs, dances to the beat, laughs with his friends. She fits into his world, and does everything she can to have his world fit into hers. She’s the most perfect person for him, and he couldn’t be more happy that he has her.
He knows that he has her support no matter what. She was his before he got famous and she’s still his now that he is. He knows that he has a safe place with him always, as she would always be by his side.
But he can’t help but feel a twinge of jealously as he watches her smile at the stage. She’s swaying along to the song. He needs her to look at him to remind him that she’s his. Like she reads his mind, turns and looks at him from over her shoulder.
“Gonna hold me Mendes?” She says, winking.
He doesn’t need to be told twice, he steps forward and wraps his arms around her from behind. He nuzzles his nose into her hair and inhales deeply. She smells like home, he can’t quite describe her scent other than that it reminds him of the candles his mom used to light when he lived at home.
She’s leaning back and resting her hands on top of his, his resting on her stomach. She’s still singing along, but now she’s smiling because the words remind her of Shawn.
Everybody wanna steal my girl, Everybody wanna take her heart away, Couple billion in the whole wide world, Find another one ‘cause she belongs to me
Their backstage now, in a room with a group of people. Mostly people from the record company, and a few other up and coming artists.
He can’t help but notice how most of the men, dateless or not, watch his girlfriend. How she holds herself, how she smiles, how she laughs, how she wins playing beer pong with a few others.
He’s watching her from across the room as one of the guys from the beer pong game starts to inch his way closer to her. She’s backing up just as much as he’s coming closer, and when he bends down to whisper in her ear she shakes her head no and says clearly,
“I have a boyfriend.”
Shawn smiles and knows that he doesn’t have to step in because she can hold her own, but for the hell of it he leaves the conversation he was having to go tell this guy to fuck off.
“Hey.” He says tucking his left arm around Y/n’s waist, extending his right hand out to shake the other guys hand. “I’m Shawn.” He says grinning evilly.
“Zac.” The other guys says, cowering. He shakes Shawn’s hand and tries to hold back his wince when Shawn squeezes to hard. Crushing the bones in Zac’s hand.
“Zac, this is Shawn, my boyfriend.” Y/n says with a small smile on her face.
“Yeah I got that.” He grumbles rubbing his hand.
“Maybe you should go find another girl to hit on, this one’s taken.” Shawn says passive aggressively, that way if anyone was watching them it would be seen as a normal conversation.
Zac nods his head and rushes away from them, shaking out his hand.
“A bit much don’t you think?” She giggles up at her boyfriend.
“Think I broke his hand.” Shawn says watching Zac try to open and close his hand repeatedly.
All she does is laugh and hide herself into Shawn’s side. He laughs too and kisses the top of her head. She smiles and then leans up to connect their lips.
Kisses like cream, Her walk is so mean, And every jaw drop, When she’s in those jeans
They pull away and she looks over at the ping pong table.
“Geoff and Mike wanted me to tell you to join us for a game of beer pong.” She says noticing how Mike and Geoff were waiting.
“Okay.” Shawn says smiling. “How about I get you a drink, and meet you there. And try not to get hit on by some random guy on your way over.” He teases.
“Not my fault.”
“True, you can’t help how beautiful you are.”
“Cheesy.” She laughs pushing his shoulder towards the bar.
She walks away, hips swaying. He can’t help but just stare at her, well him and every guy she walks by. The others just gawk at her ass, while Shawn smirks knowing that that ass they were looking at was his. Chuckling at the fact that he bought her those jeans because he knew they would make her ass look great.
He goes up to the bartender and orders drinks for his group, returning to them cheering as he hands the drinks over.
They play a few games of beer pong and Shawn just watches as she beats his ass. She’s on the other team and with the rate that their playing, he’ll be drunk before the game is even over.
But the lights dim. and her smile glows. The sun is setting behind her and her eyes have this sparkle that twinkle when she looks over at him telling him to
He laughs and does as told. Winking at her blushing face over the rim of the Solo cup.
I don’t exist, If I don’t have her, The sun doesn’t shine, The world doesn’t turn
Her hair framing her face, the way her face lights up when she smiles. He swears he could write a thousand songs about her. About her eyes, about her smile, about her lips. Those sweet lips that are colliding with his.
The soft moan that escapes her mouth as he pulls her a little closer.
“Ready to go home?” She whispers.
“You didn’t even really meet Nick.” Shawn says looking around.
“Why do I need a Nick Jonas when I have a Shawn Mendes to take me home?” She quirks an eyebrow. Shawn smirks and kisses her again. Harder this time.
It’s him moaning softly when she pulls away. He let’s his hand slide down to the globe of her ass, squeezing lightly.
“Gonna take me home Mendes, or do I need to find Zac.” She teases starting to move from his hold.
“Come here.” He says pulling her back, making her collide into his chest.
She’s laughing, trying to contain her giggles, but the alcohol in her system is making her feel light and happy.
Shawn takes her hand, leading her out of the room, towards the car they ordered. He would love to take her out for a midnight drive, but they’ve been drinking and she just wants to go home.
Everybody wanna steal my girl, Everybody wanna take her heart away, Couple billion in the whole wide world, Find another one 'cause she belongs to me
Her make up is gone. Her hair is in a messy bun, her glasses are sliding down her nose, and her lips are sealed to her coffee mug. She’s wearing his ‘Take Me Home’ shirt with her PINK booty shorts. Her bare feet are cold as they stand on the freezing hardwood. The tattoo on her ankle on full display.
She’s humming a Nick song, one that had been stuck in her head from the concert they saw earlier. Her hips are swaying a bit as Shawn watches her from the living room.
She shows no trace of sitting in the VIP section at a Nick Jonas concert. No trace of meeting Nick Jonas. No trace of partying with some of the biggest names in the music industry.
She’s just Y/n.
She’s just Shawn’s Y/n.
He loves that he gets this part of her. No one get’s to see when she’s tipsy and trying to sober up a bit so she won’t have a hangover in the morning. No one gets to see her purple glasses, or her face free from any trace of make up.
She’s just his girl. Relaxed and free.
He can’t help to think that over the billion people in the world, he wouldn’t rather have anyone else sleep next to him every night, have anyone else to wake up next to. He just wants her.
see: that moment when you’re listening to a song and a series of lines reminds you REAL HARD of a pairing and then you have to drop everything and draw something. (this is where basically all my art comes from.)
featuring again kaz and inej from the six of crows duology! I love them… ;v;
Okay, PLEASE leave me feedback on this one. I am really excited but worried about it. Anyway, Request from the request list or your own songs
Waking up to kiss you and nobody’s there, The smell of your perfume still stuck in the air, It’s hard, Yesterday I thought I saw your shadow running round, It’s funny how things never change in this old town, So far from the stars
He can’t bring himself to open his eyes, he just can’t do it.
Opening his eyes means that he has to face the day without her again. That he has go on pretending like his life is fine and that he’s moved on when in reality he can’t get her out of his head.
It’s like she’s the song that’s been stuck in his head for days, she just keep tumbling around his brain and he can’t get it to stop.
“What do you mean Shawn?” You scream at him. “Why are you doing this? We’re happy, at least I thought so. Don’t do this.” You’re crying now.
“You don’t get it Y/n, I can’t do this to you anymore. You are here and who the fuck know’s where I’m gonna be. I can’t be this shit boyfriend that says I love you and then leaves you home alone for months on end. I can’t do it, it’s eating me alive. I’m done Y/n, we’re done.”
“Shawn, if I walk out that door,” You pause for a breath. “If I walk out that door, you won’t see me again. I won’t play this game of ‘let’s break up and get back together’ so if you’re done then you’re done for life. Say that to my face, and I’m good as gone.” She says, challenging him.
She’s hoping and praying he’ll say that he can’t say that because he loves her too much to let her leave. That he doesn’t really want her to leave. This is just the jet lag is fucking with his head.
“I’m done Y/n, for life.” He spits.
But the longer he keeps his eyes closed the more in focus that day becomes. The more he can see her heartbreak right in front of him. The more he can see himself, out of his damn mind, break her heart.
If the whole world was watching I’d still dance with you, Drive highways and byways to be there with you, Over and over the only truth, Everything comes back to you
When he does open his eyes, minutes later, he inhales and feels the burn in his chest.
The truth is he wishes he could go back to that day and change everything. He wishes he could go back and prevent himself from picking a fight, and then ending it with those fucking words.
‘I’m done Y/n, for life.’
It’s the biggest lie he has ever told in his life. He is not done. Never will be done with her. She’s his love, his one true love, and he fucked it up.
He tries to live his days with the same passion but it is impossible. She was his muse, and his reason for getting up everyday. He finds himself starting a text message to her, or his thumb hovering over her contact to give her a call.
He wants to hear her voice, and ask her questions about any and everything. It’s her that always made him feel better and now that she isn’t around there is no one to be there for him. Not even a call to his Mom or Dad works anymore, he’s just stuck in this depressed state. With her at the center of all this thoughts.
And he tried, tried to find her and see if he could win her back. To see if that was even a possibility but when he saw her, she had moved on.
I saw that you moved on with someone new, In the pub that we met he’s got his arms around you, It’s so hard, So hard
“Shawn?” You stand up to greet him.
He looks so broken, so utterly fucked.
“Y/n.” He sighs when he sees you stand up.
Instinctively you give him a hug, and you know you shouldn’t because Jeremy is sitting at your table, but you inhale his scent and relax in his familiar embrace.
“I miss you.” He whispers into you ear.
You swear that if he said the damn words. That you would, you would take him back in a heartbeat. You know it in yourself that you want to be with him, till the end of time. He just has to say the damn words and Jeremy would be kicked to the curb and never thought of again. Let’s be honest, he’s your sad attempt at a rebound, but how do you rebound after having Shawn.
“I miss you too.” You let yourself say into his chest, quiet to where he can hear it but Jeremy can’t.
He sighs and holds you a little tighter. That’s when you hear someone clearing their throat. That’s when Shawn pulls away to see Jeremy.
“Jeremy.” He politely smiles and extends his hand to Shawn.
With broken eyes and a rough voice Shawn goes, “Shawn, the ex.”
It’s becoming more and more real for him now. You’ve moved on and he doesn’t have the chance to win you back anymore, he won’t ruin your happiness, not when you aren’t happy with him anymore. Although what you had said last time is still true, you are happy with Shawn.
“I should go.” Shawn says starting to walk away.
“Wait.” You can’t let him leave.
“Bae if he wants to go, let him go.” Jeremy grumbles.
He’s still disgusted with Jeremy. She deserve’s so much more than some guy that calls her Bae. She was his Darling and Love, Babe or Baby. Never his ‘Bae’, because what respect does that actually hold.
The idea of some other guy with his arms around her, or hands on her makes him sick to his stomach. But that’s the price he pays for the mistake he made.
The thought of some other guy making her smile or laugh. Making her breakfast in the morning, or dinner at night, or her midnight snack for her late study sessions.
He wonders if he’s met Jessica, if she’s stayed the night on her couch when he was there. Does he know that when Jessica is there that he has to have a bottle of wine ready for when the two decide to for go with homework and sit and gossip. Does he know that she hates cheese with her wine and that she would rather have chips and dip. Does he know that she likes to have two over easy eggs in the morning with two slices of white toast smothered in butter. Does he know all the songs she sings in the shower; Walking on Sunshine, Sex On Fire, Love On The Weekend and when she shaves she sings Did I Shave My Legs For This?
Does this new guy know everything about her, does he know her quirks.
And the last thing Shawn can think of is if this guy knows the secret to turning her on.
And I know that it’s wrong, That I can’t move on, But there’s something about you
He can’t bring himself to go out, and try and move on. He can’t do it, he’ll plan a night with the boys and then the guilt starts to haunt him and he can’t do it.
Because he’s in Love with her and doing that is no better than cheating on her when you were together.
In his head, he’s in love with her and the only person that should be on the receiving end of that is her. It’s that simple.
You still make me nervous when you walk in the room, Them butterflies they come alive when I’m next to you
He walks in Mike’s house, bearing a stupid housewarming gift his mom told him to get. He didn’t know what to get, she would have done the shopping and would have gotten the perfect gift.
“Hey Shawn.” Andrew smiles walking over, handing him a drink.
“Hey.” He nods, taking the drink and peering over the rim to notice it’s just a beer.
“Glad you made it.”
It’s the first time he’s gone out, that doesn’t include a work thing. He didn’t want to come but since everyone from work was going it would have be completely rude to skip it.
That’s when he hears it, her laugh. He can’t tell if it’s just in the back of his head or if it’s really her. He looks and turns around in a hurry.
“She’s here.” Andrew says softly. Shawn’s head snaps to the side to meet Andrews gaze. “She’s good Shawn, she’s doing good.”
“Did she bring,” He starts but can’t finish it.
“A date? No, came by herself.”
“Oh.” He says, a sigh of relief leaving his lips.
He turns back around and makes eye contact with her. Her face lighting up a bit. He doesn’t even say goodbye to Andrew he just goes straight to her.
He’s stomach a pit of nerves, butterflies making his hands shake.
“Y/n,” He starts.
“Who?” She looks around.
“Oh god,” She laughs nervously. “I don’t know, haven’t know for about two months now.”
“Yeah after you left he got all mad and I broke it off. Not even really anything to break off we had gone out on a date and that was it.” She shrugs.
“Oh.” His smile perks up.
“Yeah, anyway. How are you?”
“Not the best.”
“I’m sorry to hear that.”
“How are you?”
“Good, I’m back at school. Got my own place, actually I’m living with Jess.”
“I’ll have to drop off some wine.” He chuckles, she pushes his shoulder.
“That’s not funny, but we would appreciate it.”
Over and over the only truth, Everything comes back to you
“It was good to see you.” She says walking away.
He thought he had a chance, a chance to win her back. He would have even just taken being her friend again.
“Hey.” He calls out, not letting her leave this time. He can’t screw it up like he did the last time. “Can I call you?”