sometimes-i-hate-myself-but-other-times-i-love-myself

2:01 am 7/26/16

Sometimes it kills me that I do so much shit to feel beautiful but I still can’t love myself !! after all the time and money spent maybe I shouldn’t have got a nose job ?? Or braces or hair removal treatments or hair straighteners because whose to say I love myself any more now ?? every time one things fixed I move on to another thing to hate my acne and my body shape my height it’s never ending and being so uncomfortable with myself makes me so jealous of others and it’s disgusting it bothers me to have these negative thoughts … I feel like I’m trying so hard to be beautiful in a world that tells me everything I am is ugly and it’s so defeating

ok SO nobody actually neeeeeeds to experience this mental breakthrough with me, but I’m going to say it anyway so you’re welcome to come along for the ride. I’ve always constantly compared myself to others, especially physically. I never felt good enough compared to my friends, my classmates, anybody. I hated how I looked for a long time, and I still sometimes have moments of doubt. For the most part though, I really love what I look like now. I’m proud of my big nose and my crazy hair and my small boobs and all the other tiny “flaws” that only I noticed. And I’m really proud of how far I’ve come. I can now look at myself in the mirror and, instead of nitpicking and hating what I see, love all the things that my friends and family already loved about me. Sorry this is so cheesy and cliché. (But not really, bc I think stuff like this is really important.) Thanks for reading, gang. ✌🏻️

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