sometimes i think about the things i do and i want to punch myself in the face

I want to talk about this whole “punching nazis” thing, which I have been thinking about for some days.

To start, let me clarify that I have no moral or ethical qualms with Richard Spencer getting punched in the face on tv. I’d be happy to see it happen again.

But I do have a couple issues with much of the dialogue that has emerged in the wake of this event.

A lot of the people suddenly talking about nazis right now are people who didn’t seem to even realize they existed in this country prior to this election.

A lot of people seem to have gotten some strange ideas about how and where nazis are typically encountered, or who they actually are.

So, I’d like to talk about some of the times in my life when I’ve encountered nazis.

Before I do that, let’s try to establish a definition. There are a lot of different stripes of fascists and white supremacists out there, with varying agendas and varying degrees of organization. In the US we’ve got many types, ranging from the KKK and Aryan Nation to various unorganized skinhead rabble to the newish group calling itself the Alt Right. It seems easiest, at least for the sake of this argument, to lump those all together under one general “nazi” category. But does that really make sense? I’ll come back to that. But for now, in most of the examples I will describe below, these were people who openly called themselves such.

Also, I want to establish a bit about who I am. I don’t like to discuss any of these things publicly, but I also feel like I kind of have to, to explain where I am coming from. So: I am Jewish, I am bi, I am neurodivergent. Due to this last thing, I have certain issues navigating the physical world. I am physically fit but not athletic. I have very little self defense training. By occupation I am a musician.

And lastly I want to point out that these examples are from 15-20 years ago and describe some of my earliest encounters with these forces to provide context. And I’m going to start with some clear cut cases:

I first became aware of the existence of modern nazis my first year in high school. This was in the suburbs of San Francisco. I had a few friends who were into punk music and culture. I heard about “white power punks” and nazi skinheads who would sometimes show up at shows. When I started going out I would see them every once in a while. When I started going up to the city, at that time there were places that were absolutely notorious for nazi skinheads. I never interacted with them, I always steered clear of them, and never really fell in with the punk scene anyway. But that’s when I first became aware that there were people in modern America who called themselves nazis and directly advocated for white supremacy.

To be honest I did not think of myself as their “target” because (in my mind, at that time) Jewish culture in the SF Bay Area was practically invisible and unlikely to be on their radar. In fact I didn’t think too deeply about who their target was. I mostly thought they were crazy people who loved violence and called themselves “nazis” because it was the meanest thing they could think of, that they were in favor of “white power” because it was so obviously wrong. At this time, there was fair amount of tension in the state around the issue of immigration from Mexico. But it did not occur to me then that there could have been any relationship between the xenophobia I saw expressed by mainstream circles in conversations about Proposition 187 and the blatant, violent white supremacy expressed by the skinheads on the periphery of local punk scenes. (also please note that I am aware that not all skinheads are nazis and that there is an anti-racist element within skinhead culture as well)

In college, in Pittsburgh, I lived on a store with a convenience store on one end. One of the people who worked in this store was a skinhead who wore a jacket covered in various white power/“rock against communism” band logos. He had a group of similar buddies that often hung around nearby, a couple of whom had aryan nation tattoos. On several occasions when I woke up in the morning I would find leaflets distributed up and down the block decrying the Holocaust as a “Jewish scam to make money”. These flyers were attributed to Church of the Creator, one of the more active neo-nazi groups in Pennsylvania at that time. Every once in a while I would cautiously engage in arguments with some people on the fringes of that crew of guys who hung out in the area. Things were sometimes tense but never got physical. Soon after 9/11 most of them disappeared. I don’t know why or where to.

While traveling alone in Slovenia, I nearly ran into a parade of about 40 skinheads chanting and marching in the street while I was on the way back to where I was staying. I do not know what specific group they were affiliated with but wore patches with the common “celtic cross” symbol used by far right/white nationalist groups all over the world. At that time, fascist graffiti covered Ljubljana.

Those are just a few of the more blatant examples from that time. These experiences were not rare. The KKK and various neo-nazi groups held public parades and rallies all throughout this period, and sometimes showed up as counter protestors or forces of violence at protests for progressive causes. They marched through downtown Pittsburgh - with the local government’s blessing - and many other cities in that region.

There were protestors at those marches, and there were people who fought the nazis directly, but the general consensus in mainstream liberal circles at that time seemed to be that nazis had the right to march just like anyone else, that any violence against them would be bad. It certainly wasn’t at all common to hear college educated, NY Times-reading liberals talking about the glories of “punching nazis”. This is a problematic but very complicated phenomenon: they were to be tolerated up until the point at which they’ve come into power.

But let me explain why _I_ didn’t go around punching the nazis I saw, during those times when I encountered them personally. To some extent, part of me did follow that logic mentioned above, but that’s not the real reason. The real reason is pretty simple: most nazis are a lot better at fighting than I am, they do it more frequently, they usually travel in numbers, they are often armed, and in almost every circumstance when I’ve encountered them the odds would not have been remotely in my favor had things gotten physical.

Richard Spencer was alone and unarmed standing in front of a video camera busily talking about an internet meme while he was sucker punched. This occurred in broad daylight in a very crowded, open area with a ton of media and police present. While I applaud the anonymous puncher for seizing upon that opportunity, that’s not really a typical situation in which one encounters nazis.

Recently, Richard Spencer posted a video in reaction to this incident. In this video he mentions that the Alt Right will not succeed if they are unable to be who they are in public. I’ve seen a lot of people pointing to this video as a sign of victory over the Alt Right, a sign that they are scared. I think the latter half is true but not the former. What Spencer is saying is that they are going to ramp up security. And I would anticipate that these people will begin to receive even more protection from the current administration.

So, this is one conclusion I’d like to leave here - in most cases “punching nazis” means getting involved in serious physical violence in which your life will be at risk. And that risk is only going to increase in the future. Fantasizing about punching some idiot talking about a frog on tv is fun, but I think it ignores the realities that many have faced and many more are about to face. And while many of us have disabilities that hinder us in this department, I think it would behoove anyone who is serious about getting physical with fascists to study and learn how to do so before getting involved in a situation you are unprepared for. I would also think long and hard before making that demand of anyone else. But that’s not the most important point.

I’d like to circle back to talking about definitions. The examples I gave above are obvious. These were people who, in almost all cases, were openly wearing the actual logos of white supremacist organizations. So let me bring up a different example:

About one year after 9/11 I was in Budapest, taking an overnight train to Amsterdam. I had a spot in a sleeper compartment on a train. I got on and a couple other passengers came in. One of them was a young guy, a little older than me (I was in my early 20’s at this time). He spoke English very well and we got to talking. It turned out he was an Austrian who worked in finance. Middle management at a major bank. He bought us a couple of beers and we were getting along. Inevitably, the topic of 9/11 came up. Seemingly out of nowhere, he explains to me how “there were no Jews in the building that day”. He then goes on to explain how 9/11 and the entire War on Terror that was then unfolding was all a Jewish plot to direct money to Israel’s armed forces. And hinted that the Holocaust was a similar plot. I tried to argue with him for a bit (without letting on that I was Jewish) but it was nearly impossible to get through to him, and he soon became surly and then passed out. I tried to do the same. But what caught my attention was that this man was well spoken, dressed conservatively, he looked every bit the upper middle class finance professional. It was difficult to imagine him in a street fight. No one would have described this person as being on the fringes of his society.

Up until a year ago, if I told this story to a European, or to an American person of color, they were unsurprised. But if I told it to a white American their reaction would usually be “yeah, well, that’s Europe for you”.

But that’s never been the case.

One common narrative is that many of the groups of fascists have figured out that they aren’t going to get very far if they are seen just thugs who march around on the street wearing in leather jackets getting in scraps. many of them have figured this out some time ago, and have been infiltrating mainstream education and corporate life. And yes, that is happening.

But there is a big problem with that narrative: it ignores the fact that many of America’s institutions and businesses are, themselves, organizations that promote white supremacy. Many of our banks, many of our police departments, our prison system, much of our media. Does these mean they are all “nazis”? Not really. But what it does mean is that white supremacy is not some outside force that just suddenly popped out of Steve Bannon’s suitcase. It’s been here for a long time. It is deeply engrained in our society. Fascism is not some new danger that we suddenly need to prevent from being “normalized” - for much of America, fascism has been the norm for a very long time.

Here’s my point with all of this: sooner or later, Trump will be defeated. This regime is monstrous, but I have seen the power and anger and sheer volume of opposition to it, and I do not think that this regime will last. My worry is, once this most obvious of enemies is defeated, the liberal establishment will go right back to completely forgetting that white supremacy and fascism are a major problem in this country. The sad fact is, even when Democrats in power, even when the POTUS is the most progressive sounding person electable, the nazis are still here, white supremacy is still here, fascism is still here. And not always on “the other side”. We need to remember that, we need to keep pointing to them and ostracizing them and speaking out against white supremacy and fascism even when it looks like things are more comfortable, because that comfort is a trap.

so im absolutely obsessed with @skyesentinels ‘s youtube au and i got an IdeaTM (pls read the voltron youtube au frfr it’s s o good)

-For april fools, Keith and Pidge make a new channel for ‘supernatural hunting and alien spotting’
     -The video they post is just them running around Keith’s apartment while lance chases them while wearing a bedsheet
          -there are many gifs of lance tripping and face planting because he can’t see
-they all think it’s just an one time thing they did for a funny april fools thing but no
     -the fans won’t allow it
     
-the channel somehow gets to 100,000 subscribers, and keith and pidge get sent an actual silver play button from youtube for a channel they made as a joke
      -then they realize that they can’t just let the channel die now
-So they continue making videos
-they start out mostly the same as the first video, just obviously fake ‘paranormal activity’ while someone chases them
     -there are also many gifs of shiro dragging keith away while being the ‘ghost’
     -also many, many audio clips of keith’s high pitched screaming as this is done
-Lance is a fan favorite in these videos because he always ends up screaming and falling into keith’s arms
     -the klance shippers l i v e for this channel
-shiro is the worst to have in these videos unless he’s the ghost
     -shiro: maybe the real ghost was the friends we made along the way
     -keith: sh u t up shiro this is s e r i o u s
     -”yea i’d punch a ghost. I’d fight every single ghost in the astral plane. im not scared”
-there’s a video of keith filming lance in the middle of his morning routine and yelling “look guys! It’s a ghost, and it’s hideous
     -the rest of the video is the camera shaking while keith runs for his life
-there are x-file memes everywhere
     -every single video there are new clips on tumblr with the x-files theme playing
-g h o s t  a d v e n t u r e  m e m e s
     -”My name is Keith Kogane. I’ve never believed in ghosts until I came face to face with one. So I set out on a quest to capture what I once saw onto video….With no big camera crews following us around, I am joined only by my fellow investigator Pidge Holt and our equipment tech Hunk Garrett. The three of us will travel to the some of most highly active paranormal locations, where we will spend an entire night, being locked down from dusk until dawn….Raw…Extreme…These are our Ghost Adventures.”
     -this leads the fandom to make memes about zak bagans being keith’s boyfriend
     -lance doesn’t realize that it’s all a meme and he’s??? So confused?? Like i thought keith and i bonded???? Who is zak and what does he have that i dont???????
      -”zak bagans is my boyfriend and i would die for him” -keith probably
      -keith does have a lowkey unironic crush on zak bagans and the only one that knows is shiro
-then they start making other videos of them doing things like looking for aliens/bigfoot/mothman ect
     -everyone likes these videos too because keith almost always starts ranting that mothman is r e a l.
     -pidge does the same but with nessie
-this leads to them making videos about conspiracy theories
     -these are basically just 30 minute long unedited videos of them screaming about cryptids
-they also start doing those cursed games like the bath game and midnight game
     -they get the whole gang together to play the midnight game but it’s basically just them sitting in a dark room with candles pretending to feel stuf
     -except lance who claims he’s actually feeling things, but in reality its just keith messing with him
-their videos sometimes end with the police showing up one way or another
      -once they had to pause making a video because keith screamed so loud that his neighbors thought he was dying so now there’s footage of keith awkwardly explaining to a police officer what they were doing
      -the fandom has started making bets to whether or not the police will show up in the next video or not
-theres a compilation of videos from pidge’s snapchat that are just a slow zoom of keith’s face as he does something with the caption ‘caught a cryptid on video!!!!!!!!’
     -keith tried to get her back but he’s much less sneaky about it so most of keith’s video’s usually end with pidge tackling him
-the fans get ‘#cryptidkeith’ treading on twitter and keith wants to die
     -most of it is edits of keith’s face of bigfoot or screenshots of keith in the background of a shot with that red circle and zoom in of him (see: @keithsightings)
     -theres also a lot of keith x mothman
     -keith has never been more impressed and also disgusted by his fandom

Bad Temper

MASTERLIST

Requested: Jealous Shawn. Not sure I like this but I tried. 

Word count: 2,658

“I think this might actually be it!” I said, folding the last box together. I ran my fingers through my hair, breathing out heavily. 

I thought it would never end. No matter where I looked, there had always been more boxes to start on. But now, I’d actually unpacked the last one.

“What?” Shawn yelled from the other room, fumbling with his precious guitars as always. 

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My Dear Tumblr Friends,

Some of you have been with me for years. YEARS. And I wanna tell you a story.

A story about a girl who grew up mean, and hateful, and was almost a bully in school.
Not a steal-your-lunch-money-and-punch-you-in-the-face bully, but a girl who was rude for no reason, and who pushed people away.

I don’t want to make excuses for myself, that kind of behaviour is gross.
But I want you to know why. I was a kid who was taught that I had to pretend I fit in. Who had to be happy and cheerful and make sure everyone liked her, but no one really knew her. Because then they’d know how hurt she was when the kids would whine about having to sit with her so she wouldn’t be by herself when the rest of the class was playing basketball. Because then they’d know she was painfully aware of how different she was. 
For years I put up with boys UNPLUGGING my MOTORIZED WHEELCHAIR as I was moving because ~it was cute~ ~they’re just teasing you because they like you~
For years I put up with always being the guy’s best friend, but never being the girl friend because HEAVENS a human male ACTUALLY conSIDER being with a girl in a wheelchair (just so you know!!! still havent found one!!!!)

But I’m done. One day I realized I don’t care how the rest of the world sees me, it’s how I see me that matters. Once I accepted myself, once I said “yes I’m in a wheelchair and that means I’ll have to be alone in some things but that’s Okay”, life got way better. 

I look at the photo above, tiny lil’ me in a BOUDOIR shoot, something I never thought I’d do when I was in my phase of “wear whatever makes you blend in because you already stick out too much”, I’m proud of myself. I’m proud of getting through the hurtful words that get thrown at me when I’m out in public, and the words that get thrown at me online. I’m proud of working through my own mental health issues, and becoming stronger. I’m proud that I did all of this by myself. Because sometimes you have to save yourself.

I thought I had no one, but I had someone. I had me.
My chair is in this photo because it’s an integral piece of who I am. I never want to be thought of as “removed” from it. It influences who I am, what I think, how I speak, but my body is more than my chair. And it took me years, but I love it now.

TLDR; LOOK HOW CUTE I AM!!!!!

The Tree That Outsmarted Me and Punched Me in the Face

Ok so this one isn’t so much wild as it is ‘Rekina what the heck do you think you’re doing sit down this instant’ kinda deal.

Our story begins back when I worked retail.

Alrighty so quick update. The part of Saskatchewan where I live is flat. I don’t mean mildly ho hum flat I mean flat ok like the nearest slight incline(besides the dump) is nearly a fifteen minute drive. ok flat as a ruler

And because of this intense flatness we get some equally intense wind. The last few days we’ve had winds upwards of 90km (55mph) and that’s a pretty normal seen it all before kind of wind storm. Nothing out of the ordinary. But then sometimes we get even worse winds called plough winds. Now, these are sometimes hurricane force winds ok windy as all get out

These winds make a straight path across the prairies, ripping roofs off, uprooting trees, and causing general havoc ok

there’s a reason they are called plough winds they plough over everything in sight like a bull in a china shop it has zero regard for your average home or retail employee like myself

Plough winds only show their ugly faces during the summer. and in summers I worked in the garden center. 

Now, normal people would stay indoors during winds like this. Common, sesnible people would hunker down and batten down the hatches and wait for the whole thing to blow over. Not me. Not only was I at work

I was outside

That’s right folks yours truly still had to go out and water the plants in winds fast enough to shut down most cities

So there I am in my oversized rain jacket that I was practically swimming in. This thing trailed along the ground it was so big on me. I have my garden hose on and am doing my thing

First of all, do you have any idea how hard it is to water plants when the water comes out of the hose and just kinda shoots off into the distance

It’s an acquired skill to say the least k I was standing like two feet to the side of the plant I actually wanted to water

Now if that wasn’t annoying enough i also have to deal with these jerks of trees

At the back of the center is our tree selection. I’d tied them down with the full stregnth of my scout knot tying knowledge and most of them stayed secure. But there was three little jerks on the very end that would tip over, making me go and pick them up again

This happened every ten seconds.

I would go, water a plant, and then drop everyhting to pick up these stupid trees

I did this for five hours straight

Then one time while I’m picking up a fallen ash, this little apple tree gets cheeky and topples down right on top of my head.

It didn’t hurt, but those leaves are like little whips in the wind my whole face was stinging by the time I got the jerk set up right again

This tree was about to become a very big problem

See when the other trees tipped over they would politely lay in place until i could reach them, still tethered loosely to the pole. But not this apple tree oh no

Little did i know i was dealing with Houdini Incarnated into a tree.

So I’m minding my buisness watering a plant from a distance and I happen to see Houdini take the fall. Except this time something was different. This time it not only fell, but it started to roll

It had somehow jumped the little enclosure and slipped the bonds

Im still pretty chill at this point. The whole center is surrounded by a fence where could it possibily go I’ll just go get it when it hits the fence right?

Wrong.

Because I was dealing with an escape artist ok what happens next had nothing to do with me

See off in one corner we had this pile of manure right near the fence. 

This tree my little Houdini was chugging towards it at full speed, those little leaves were like sails it was just a’cruisin down aisles of bricks. It’s fine tho it’ll hit the manue and–

It hit the manure alright

It rolled up the manure pile 

and over the fence

So now The Little Tree That Could was barreling around on the highway like a phsychotic leafy bat out of hell

My first thought is if that hits someone im so fired

I scream and drop the hose and begin my pursuit because I am not getting fired over an apple tree ok no sire im going down with my dignity

So i do the only logial thing in my head

Most people would run through the open get four feet behind them and calmly make their way to the highway. Not me

I sprinted across the compound, scrambled up the manue pile, and vaulted the fence

For one glorious moment I thought I could fly.

And then I plunged downwards with a very undignified squeal.

Still I splash down into the ditch and prepare to make my heroic capture

Problem: I had just landed chest deep in slough.

For those of you lucky souls who don’t know what a slough is let me explain

A slough is what happens when stagnat water, cow crap, cow piss, and crop fertilizer mix and heat up in the sun. Doesn’t smell good.

And I just landed chest deep in the stuff. Gross doesn’t even begin to cover it

But being the trooper I am i decide I’m going to end this day on a high note and salvage my dignity

I heave myself out of the slough and take off after the tree which is dancing around the thankfully empty highway

Just one issue: Plough Winds tend to change direction

So there I am chasing this freaking apple tree around in circles and it’s winning ok every time I get close to grabbing the trunk of branch the wind throws it in another direction leaving me stumbling like a drunk moose as I try to adjust course 

This goes on for a solid twenty minutes

I’m back and forth across this highway cursing enough to make a sailor blush

And then victory is in sight my fingers graze the trunk and–

the wind stops

The base of the tree is so heavy with water that It sits straight up and whacks me across the face harder than Dwayne Johnson ever could

My momentum throws me forward, my foot catches the pot

and I sail head first into the next slough

I am now covered in disgusting, thick, sticky water and that tree is just taunting me on the road

Eventually I manage to snag the little jerk and I start dragging it back towards the compound like oh yeah who the boss? i’m the boss i caught the tree 

Just as I see  two more trees making a break for it over the fence

It was a long end of shift to say the least

I had a black eye from that tree for a week and a lovely bleeding cut on my forehead. But i caught it and I am still proud of that to this day

Sing to Me

A soulmate one shot I took a long time to write, I’m sorry it took so long, but I hope it was worth it.

Disclaimer: I don’t own the gifs/images used.

Originally posted by babywoon

You live in the heart of the city of Seoul. Cars fly over the tarmac roads and people talk loudly in the busy streets. They say that cities never sleep, and that is true. They’re loud, and polluted, and lights shine from the moment you wake to the moment you lay your head to rest. But none of that can chase away your thoughts, nothing can drown out the sound of him.

Soulmates live in this world, it’s bizarre, not not even the more intelligent of those around us can understand why such a concept exists. It just does, and everyone’s story is different.

Your Mother used to tell you of the way her eyes would change colour according to the shade of your father’s hair. She never fails to tell you the story of how she woke up in astonishment to an unflattering shade of green.

Your friend told you that she has a clock etched on her skin, it’s unclear what it means, but you both suspect it’s the time zone that her soulmate lives in.

But you? Well, you can hear your soulmate when he sings.

His voice rings in your head louder than any sound can drown out. And at first, you tried everything. You tried blasting music through headphones, sleeping, running in the loud city sounds. But nothing could stop his voice from reaching every corner of your mind.

As a child, you loved to hear him sing, as you grew older, it frustrated you more than anything. Now? Well, you’ve found peace with it. Whenever his gentle, angelic voice starts, you feel yourself relax. He’ll sing a bit of everything, but you like it best when he’s bellowing his vocal chords to romantic ballad songs.

It’s hard to describe his voice to someone, and you’ve tried many times. It changes like the weather, sometimes he’s singing silvery, so soft and light it’s beautiful, other times it’s deep and low, like literal singing sex.

It made you wonder what you were to him. Could he hear you when your strident voice emitted while you showered? Or when you were drunk and messing with your friends loudly in the streets?

You sighed as you pulled your books closer to your chest, walking towards your next class when your head filled with his voice.

For a moment, it was in your head, or so you thought. But then you realised, other people had stopped, and that was when it occurred to you that this time, the voice wasn’t just in your head. Unconsciously, you stepped towards the room where the voice sounded.

You pushed open the door to see the face to the voice you have always heard.

He sat on a desk of an empty maths classroom. He looked so focused, only to be snapped from it no you’d disturbed him. His candy floss pink hair shifted from his brown eyes as he looked at you. He put his sheet of music on the desk and slid so he was simply leaning, shoving his hands in his black jean pockets.

“Can I help you?” He sounded so casual, while you felt like you were about to faint.

“You… I’ve heard… You’re my soulmate right?”

You sounded like an idiot, you felt like a bigger one. You looked at him still, even through the pounding of your heart. He frowned.

“Sing to me, please.” He stated, it was hardly a question.

You frowned, “Me?”

“No, I was talking to the poster behind you- yes, you.”

His sarcasm made you scowl, but you took in a deep breath anyway. There was no way you could match his voice, there was no way you could even compare.

You sang a few lines, you stopped when you saw his eyes turn wide; he looked like a deep in headlights.

“You weren’t shitting me.” He breathed.

“Why would I do something like that?”

“I’m popular, you know, girls have tried this crap on me before.” he stood up and walked over to you, his hands still in his pocket. He stopped stepping when he was stood before you.

“Well, it’s a good thing you’re not stupid enough to believe them.” You responded, feeling a little breathless.

“It is a good thing.” He agreed, placing a hand on your cheek. His thumb brushed against your skin, and his eyes scanned your face. His eyes were lit like fireflies, filled with interest. His lips pouted slightly, as though he was thinking, then he smiled, and the pink in his hair flooded against his cheeks.

“I must say, you’re much more beautiful than your voice.”

“Excuse me?” You responded playfully, it was clear to you that he knew that music really wasn’t your speciality after all this time.

“Let’s just say I don’t think you’ll be winning the x factor any time soon. I’d also like to mention how inconvenient your timing is to start singing. One time, you starting singing overdose while I was in the middle of an exam, that’s if you can even call it singing, you sounded like a cat being run over by a lawn mower.”

You hit his shoulder lightly, pushing him back, laughter filling the room from both of you.

“Alright, there’s no need to be rude. I pride myself very much in my singing ability.” You told him, and he smiled.

“Me too.”

“Your voice is incredible, I mean, really.” You tell him, and his hand that was once on your cheek was now in his hair, rubbing the back of his head as the pink dusted back against his cheeks.

“You think? I mean, I guess so. I wrote you a song actually… Do you maybe want to hear it?”

It was though someone had punched you in the gut, sending your heart to your throat, you nodded, voiceless.

“I want something else before I can do that though.”

“What’s that?” You asked him.

“A date.” He stated.

“Then what are you waiting for.”

He didn’t need telling twice.

It was the middle of the day, the sun shining highly against the city buildings. You had classes to be at, teachers to please, but none of that mattered as he took you by the hand, pulling you to the doors and walking you into a new world, his world.

When We Collide (Part 5)

Pairing: Assistant!Y/N/CEO!Luke

Rating: PG-All

Parts: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4

Summary: He is the definition of high class smart ass, swimming in Dom Pierre Pérignon champagne and has never seen the shadow of poverty. She is underprivileged, lives in a messy dorm room on sale and struggles working as an assistant after being thrown out of college. But how will they collide when Luke makes Y/N pregnant after a drunkenly one night stand?

”No way! Seriously? They really kicked you out of college?”

You rolled your eyes and glared over at Nicole for being the gossip snitch, something she had been her whole life but you really had wished she would have kept this to yourself just for a while. It was, after all, pretty humiliating when you thought about it.

“You sound like you’re surprised, Joey.” You commented with a glimpse in the eye and lifted your beer up to your mouth, letting the taste explode your senses and cool down your pre-sweating forehead.

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Don’t Say Anything (part 10)

Summary: You finally decide to tell Bucky that you’ve been in love with him since the day you met but what happens when you walk in on him with a girl? And not just any girl; Natasha.

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Warnings: I CAAAANNNNTTTTTTTTT

A/N: I’m going to Pride for the first time this Saturday and I’m sooooo excited :)

It goes completely silent. Like dead silent and you hate it. Wanda’s looking between you and Natasha while your voice gets caught up in your throat.

“Nat.. I-I’m-” you stop speaking, running your fingers through your hair.

The fiery red head stood in front of you, mouth slightly open in shock. For a spy, she did not see this coming. Everything happened so fast. You didn’t mean to blurt it out. You cracked under pressure. This is exactly what you were trying to prevent from happening.

Suddenly the door bursts open and in walks Bucky and Steve, worried looks etched on their faces and guns pointed.

“What’s going on? We heard yelling.” Steve spoke first, eyes searching the room. From where they were, all they could hear was muffled yelling and they thought you and the girls were in some sort of danger. Once Steve looks at you, he lowers his gun. “What happened?”

Your eyes travel over to Nat who kept her gaze on the ground. Your heart broke. “Nat, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

Steve glances between the two of you before glaring at Bucky. “You’re not waiting any longer - talk to her.”

“But-”

“Talk to her!”

Bucky let out a shaky breath before stepping towards Nat. “Natasha can I.. Can I talk to you? Alone?”

She cleared her throat. “Yeah, we have a lot to talk about.”

You watch the two exit your room and your eyes fill with tears yet again. As your lip quivered, Steve pulled you into a hug where you let out a sob. “She hates me, Steve. I hurt her.”

“She doesn’t hate you, Y/N.” he sighed, rubbing your back in a comforting manner.

“You didn’t see the way she looked at me. She was so hurt. I betrayed her.” you cried. “What kind of friend am I?”

He shushed you, petting your hair softly as you cried your eyes out. It wasn’t supposed to happen like this. She wasn’t supposed to find out. All you wanted was for them to be happy regardless if it hurt your feelings and made you want to drown in your own tears.

Wanda slowly got off the bed and placed her hand on your back. “Are you okay?”

You step away from Steve and wipe away your tears. “I fucked up.”

“I tried to stop it, Y/N.”

“I know. I should’ve walked out or something. Anything really.” you sniffled. “Now she hates me.”

“Steve’s right, she doesn’t hate you.” Wanda frowned. “Shocked, yeah. But she would never hate you.”

“Why wouldn’t she hate me? She just found out that her best friend is in love with her boyfriend. Of course she hates me!” you exclaim.

Steve’s eyebrows raise. “You’re in love with Bucky?”

Both you and Wanda ignore him. “Don’t think like that. She doesn’t hate you.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Wait.” Steve waved his hand. “You’re in love with Bucky?”

“Don’t make me repeat it.” you sigh.

“For how long?”

“Does it matter? Nothing good-”

“Five years.” Wanda cut in and you glare at her.

“Five years?!” he shouts. “Oh my god. Oh my god.”

“What?” the both of you say, watching as Steve slapped his palm against his forehead.

“Bucky, he-” but he stops himself.

“He what?” you question.

Steve cleared his throat. “That’s not for me to tell.”

“What the hell? Tell me.” you take a step towards the blonde.

He takes a step backwards. “No.”

“Steve, I’ve had enough today. Just tell me.”

“You’ll have to ask Bucky.”

You scoff. As if you’ll ever go near Bucky now. You should’ve just stayed away from him right when you found out about the two of them. Now everything’s out of control. You’re pretty sure Natasha hates you and Bucky  - Why would Bucky want to be with you now? Nothing will change with him.

Platinum blonde hair pokes into your room and the man attached to it smiles. “Guess who’s back and brought a cake… What’s going on? Why are your eyes all red?”

He fully steps into your room with a bag hanging from his wrist and you exhale loudly.

“Not now, Pietro.” Wanda says, shooing him away with her hand.

Pietro snarls. “Not now my ass, she’s crying.”

“Just go!” she points to the door.

“Like I’d ever listen to you, младшая сестра.” he scoffed, setting the bag down on your bed. “What happened.”

“She’s in love with Bucky.” Steve says as Pietro walked towards you.

“You finally told him? Did he reject you? Is that why you’re crying?” he held you by your upper arm, eyes filled with concern. You glance at Wanda then at Steve before letting out a sigh.

And you told him everything.


Bucky led Natasha to his room where he shut the door and locked it so they could have their private conversation. Bucky was nervous. His hands were shaking, his heart was pounding and he wanted to throw up.

If he even said the slightest thing to piss her off, she’d murder him. Literally. Bucky walks around her and sits on his bed, patting the spot next to him. Natasha doesn’t say a word as she sits beside him, a decent gap space between the two of them. She was thinking hard, thinking about the mini argument with Bucky 3 days ago, thinking about everything that’s happened, literally in the past hour and 30 minutes.

The brunette clasps his hands together, leaving them to rest on his lap and clears his throat. “So..”

“Do you like Y/N?” Nat asked, not bothering to waste any time. “Be honest with me.”

“I - Yeah. Yeah, I do.” he breathed.

Natasha exhaled an ‘okay’ and looked over at Bucky. “Don’t hurt my best friend, Barnes. Do you hear me?”

Bucky nods. “Yeah.”

“If she ever comes crying to me because of you, you’re dead.”

“Got it.”

“Alright.” she nods. “We’re done here.”

Natasha moves to stand up but Bucky grabs her hand. “Wait, that’s it? We didn’t even get to actually talk!”

“Because there’s nothing to talk about!” she replied.

Bucky scoffed. “There’s a lot to talk about.”

The red head sighed and sat to face Bucky. “Alright, fine. Let’s talk.”

“Thank you.” he breathed. “Before I start I just want you to know that I do care about you and you’re a great person.” Nat nods. “Okay so, before.. us happened I had a thing for Y/N but I didn’t think she.. you know, liked me back.” this made Nat scoff as she thought back to what you had blurted out earlier. “And then you came along and we got to talking which then led to.. you know and every time I was with you, I forgot about my feelings for Y/N. You were like a distraction. What we had was a.. a fling. You know that. I enjoyed your company. You filled the hole inside me briefly, the one that yearned for Y/N’s love and affection. I know this all sounds bad, trust me - and I know that messing with your feelings was a douchebag move but at the time, I thought I wanted to be with you. I told myself over and over again that I wanted to be with you and not Y/N but fuck, seeing Pietro all over her these past couple of days annoyed the hell out of me and I couldn’t lie to myself anymore - I couldn’t hurt you as well. I couldn’t string you along, making you think that I loved you when really, my heart belongs to Y/N.”

Nat nods her head. “So you were using me this whole time?”

“I wouldn’t necessarily word it like that but yeah.” he sighed. “It was a dick move, I know. It’s fine if you want to hit me or cut my balls off. I deserve it. I’m sorry.”

The red head exhales. “If I were some other woman, I’d be absolutely furious right now. I’d want to punch you, knee you in the balls so hard that you wouldn’t be able to produce children later on in the future.” Bucky chuckled softly. “But, I’m not some other woman. I’m me. And although everything you just said was fucked up, I shouldn’t be one to judge because I’ve been using you too.”

Bucky raises his eyebrows at Natasha’s words. “What?”

“I was in a bad place when we started talking. Bruce had ran off without even saying goodbye to me. I had to hear from Tony that he left. Fucking Tony. I was sad, I mean I really did love him. I get that he had to leave for the protection of everyone around him but a simple goodbye would’ve sufficed, you know?” Bucky nods. “Anyways we got to talking and all that other stuff and for a minute, you’d make me forget about all the heartbreak Bruce caused me. Just like I filled the hole in you that craved Y/N, you filled the hole in me. A distraction was what you were. You distracted me from my real feelings. I know what we had was a fling, I never saw it as anything more than a casual talk and fuck - sometimes make out sessions. But other than that, I didn’t have feelings for you. I liked the fact that you distracted me from Bruce and I guess I made myself think that I actually liked you in the process.” she ran her fingers through her hair. “And I’m sorry too.”

“Wow.” Bucky laughed, staring straight ahead at his wall. “So us dating, that was-”

“Completely idiotic and for no reason.” she finished for him.

He face palmed. “Oh my god, we’re idiots.”

“Yeah,” she laughed. “We are.”

“We didn’t even actually like each other, why did we start dating?” Bucky questioned, although he already knew the answer.

I have no idea.” Nat laughed. “Oh, and sorry about getting all mad after accusing you of liking Y/N. I guess I got frustrated that reality was setting in and the fantasy was no longer there.”

“It’s cool. Sorry for.. literally everything.” Bucky shrugged.

“It’s fine.” she chuckled. “No hard feelings?”

“No hard feelings.” he nodded before running his fingers through his hair. “Oh god, now I have to talk to Y/N. What if she doesn’t feel the same way?”

“I have a feeling she will.” the spy says as she stood up, extending her hand out for Bucky to take. “Come on, let’s go get your girl.”

The super soldier takes her hand and stands up, following her out to the hallway. “You know Y/N’s a jealous person, right? Not too jealous though but a reasonable amount of jealous.” she says.

“Yeah, it’s cute, right?” he smiled. “Ooo she’s gonna get so mad and jealous when she realizes that we’ve had sex. Plus those make out sessions and the amount of times she’s caught us. Wow. You’re in some deep shit.”

“She’s gonna get mad at you, not me.” Nat scoffed.

“You were messing around with her man.” Bucky countered.

She rolled her eyes. “Sisters before misters, Barnes. Never forget.”

“Yeah well… Bucky before Nat.” he replied, causing the red head to laugh.


A/N: OH MY GOD I’M FINALLY DONE WITH THIS FLIPPING CHAPTER AND I REALLY HAVE TO PEE SO HERE YOU GO I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS PART, IMA GO PEE NOW. TELL ME WHAT YA THINK

TAGS ARE CLOSED BC I CN’T KEEP UP SORRY AMIGOS

Tags:

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Sorry to the peeps who didn’t get tagged! Ima go pee now lmao

The Only Exception

MASTERLIST

Requested: no but a little angst never hurt anyone. also shoutout to Emily for being awesome. 

Word count: 3,001

Shawn was the kind of guy that on the outside seemed like such an innocent boy, but those who actually knew him, knew that was the biggest fake facade you could ever come across. 

I couldn’t count how many girls he had slept with only using my ten fingers. I couldn’t keep up on the names of the girls that had walked out of our front door after a night out and I surely couldn’t keep track on how many girls, he snuck in late at night when he thought I was sleeping. 

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Call Boy Winwin (Winwin x Reader)

Rating: M

(A/N) AYYY WAZZZ UPPPPPP MY BABESSS!!!! I’m back and ready to make y’all bust A NUT! People said it wasn’t possible, Winwin, an angel, a precious baby, could never be a call boy. Well…listen up children: yOU CAN DO ANYTHING U SET UR MIND TO SO HERE WE ARE! I’m super proud of this one and happy how it turned out, so please ENJOY!!!

Originally posted by fairyprincewinwin

The popular cozy cafe was ridden with customers, leaving you squeezed in a corner on a fluffy cushion with your cup of tea in hand and balancing a book on your knee. Luckily you sat directly next to a big window, allowing you a view of the whole street, where fashionable young couples and groups of friends were strutting about hand in hand, arms looped together like destiny knots.

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When intentions are lost in translation

For @snowbaz-feda day 29. Baz takes care of Simon, and Simon accuses Baz of plotting.

SIMON:

I didn’t want to go off and kill them all, I thought I could fight the beasts and chase them away, but there are too many of them and none of my spells are coming out right and there are cuts across my body where they’ve slashed me with their claws and I can’t. I can’t fight them. The sword drops from my hand, the magic spills over, and I feel the explosion at the same moment I hit the ground.

BAZ:

Snow barely makes it through the door and to his bed before he collapses, his upper body slumped across the bed with the rest of him still hanging off it, knees scraping the floor. I wait for him to heave himself the rest of the way up, but he doesn’t move. I can smell blood, and his shirt is torn in a few places.

I ignore the sensation of my fangs filling my mouth and cautiously step closer.

‘Snow?’

There’s no answer, not even a groan, and he’s still not moving. I take in the dishevelled state of his hair and the scars on his back, visible through the tears in the fabric of his shirt, and I forget all about keeping my distance and rush to his side. I grab his wrist.

There’s a pulse, but it’s slow and irregular, and he seems to be struggling to breathe.

Up close the smell of blood is stronger, and I can see that he’s unconscious. Whatever it was has seriously hurt him. He starts to slump back towards the ground and I catch him with an arm around his shoulders. I try to figure out how to move him onto the bed with the least physical contact possible. In the end, I scoop him up with my other arm under his knees, and I try not to hold him too close as I lift him up and gently lay him on his back on the bed.

I take out my wand and spell away the tattered remains of his shirt, dropping them onto the floor for him to deal with later. There are cuts and wounds all over his chest, some bleeding quite badly, and his face looks pale underneath all the blood and grime and he looks like he could be dead. There’s a strange ache in the pit of my stomach, and I won’t pretend I don’t know what it is. (It’s the feeling of seeing the one you love close to death, and realising how close you are to losing him.)

I cast every healing spell I can think of, repeating them over and over, until the scars finally start to shrink and the colour returns to his cheeks.

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Forever Mine

Summary: You and Roman broke up 4 months and you’re seeing someone new. You unexpectedly bump into Roman and his date when you’re with yours as well. As soon as your date ends, Roman takes his chance and shows you who you have always belonged to.

Based on the prompt: ‘’Ain’t nobody ever told you who your real daddy is?’’
Warnings: Pure smut omg, daddy kink, language
(A/N) So you guys voted for this prompt to be written first so here it is! Grab something to drink and to eat, because this is hella long: 4,000+ words. I hope you guys like it. I’m sorry if it’s written really messy, this is the first time I’ve written in a long time. Forgive me if this is trash😩

——————–

“This is already the third time this week you’re going out with that Bryson,” Seth said as he sat on my bed.

“I’m fully aware of how many times I’m going out with him,” I chuckled back at him as I did my make-up. “He’s a really nice guy.”

“I never said he wasn’t, it’s just…” he paused and looked at me in the mirror, “never mind.”

“No tell me, what’s the matter?” I asked confused as I turned around to face him. Seth has always been honest with me so I always listened to what he got to say.

“Aren’t you moving a bit too fast? I mean, only four months have passed since Roman and you broke up.” He carefully spoke.

“I’m not moving ‘too fast’, I’m moving on with my life and I’m sure Roman too has moved on.”

“He’s still not over you,” he mumbled quietly, hoping I didn’t hear it. I decided to not have this discussion with him and try to focus on tonight. “So this Bryson dude, you really like him?”

“I do, he’s really sweet, he cares about me, makes me laugh,” I smiled as I wore my heels.

“Roman does too, remember that time the three of us were at the lake and he pushed me into the water just to make you laugh because you felt down? Or that time when sprained your ankle when you wore those ridiculous high heels and Roman carried you on his back the entire night? Also the time the two of you were all over each other, hugging and kissing each other, causing to ignore the shit out of me.” Seth reminded me.

“How can I forget?” I chuckled, thinking back. Roman and I were super close and we loved each other so much that when we broke up, everyone was in awe, even the two of us couldn’t get used to it at first. The reason we broke up was mainly because of me not being able to get used him being on the road so often. I tried my hardest to adjust and he saw how much I effort I was making, but eventually, he made the heartbreaking decision to end things. I didn’t agree, of course, but he said it was the best for us both. ‘’Look, how unfortunate it is, things just didn’t worked out between us.’’

‘’What if he wants you back? I’ll kick your ass if you’re staying with that Bryson kid.’’ Seth said frustrated.

‘’It’s not your decision to make, but thanks for letting me know what I can expect,’’ I sweetly smiled as I hugged him. ‘’Thanks for looking out for me, but I’m a big girl.’’

‘’Whatever you want y/n, I still think you and Roman should get back together,’’ He said. As he was about to speak, the doorbell rang. I jumped excitedly and grabbed my bag.

‘’You can let yourself out right? Love you Seth,’’ I kissed his check and ran downstairs.  

‘’You’re making a mistake girl!’’ He shouted, causing me to roll my eyes, ‘’Love you too.’’ Seth has always been like a brother to me and even during the time me and Roman split up, he never failed to be there for me when I needed someone.

‘’You look stunning,’’ Bryson smiled as I opened the door.

‘’Thank you,’’ I smiled. ‘’You don’t look as terrible as expected.’’ I joked. He laughed and took my hand in his.

‘’Bryson?’’ I heard Seth’s voice behind me. Oh lord, save me.

‘’Yeah that’s me, who’re you?’’ Bryson asked confused.

‘’My name’s Seth, nice to meet you. I’m y/n’s best friend. Oh and also the best friend of her ex,’’ Seth slyly smiled. I turned around and gave him a death glare.

‘’Oh well, it’s nice to meet you. Y/n told loads about you.’’ They shook each other’s hands, Seth smiling fake.

‘’Good things I hope.’’

‘’The most wonderful things, we gotta go now. Bye Seth.’’ I hastily said as I grabbed Bryson’s hand and rushed to his car. ‘’I’m sorry about that,’’ I sighed as we sat down. ‘’He can be an idiot sometimes.’’

‘’It’s fine baby, don’t worry.’’ Bryson smiled and placed his hand on my thigh. ‘’You ready to go?’’

‘’Totally.’’ I smiled back. He started the car and we drove off.

——————–

‘’Ever been here before?’’ Bryson asked as we parked the car. ‘’It opened a few months ago I think. Their food is absolutely delicious.’’

‘’Well, you made me pretty curious,’’ I smiled. He bend down and gently kissed me.

‘’Let’s eat till we can’t walk anymore.’’ Bryson laughed, making me laugh too. We crossed the road and entered the restaurant. The smell of fresh cooked tomato sauce filled my nose. ‘’We ordered a table for two,’’ he said to the waiter. I looked around while Bryson and the waiter figured things out.

‘’I can’t stop saying how beautiful you look,’’ a familiar deep voice said from behind me. My heart sank in my shoes. I slowly turned around, praying that it wasn’t who my mind immediately thought of. But as usual, the universe hates me. It was Roman with another girl, also on a date. I didn’t realize I was still looking at him until his eyes fell on mine, widened with surprise and disbelieve. If it was because of  me being with someone else or just being in shock by seeing me, I don’t know. I could punch myself in the face for not turning back right away, instead, I kept looking at how good he looked; his hair in a pulled back in a bun, his beard was trimmed,  he wore a grey suit with a white shirt.  I was speechless by the way he looked, not that he looked any different than before.

‘’Y/n, you ready?’’ Bryson asked. I quickly turned my head and nodded with a smile. I had no idea how to feel about this whole situation. Seeing Roman after four rough months filled with all kinds of emotions, left me with more feelings than I actually should have at the very moment. ‘’Babe?’’ He spoke again. Roman coughed roughly, indicating how irritated he was by how Bryson called me.

‘’Yeah I’m sorry, I was just thinking of something.’’

‘’It’s okay sweetheart, let’s sit down, we’re at table six.’’ He wrapped his arm around my waist as we started to walk to our table. I would normally never even think of turning around, but since the relationship me and Roman had was so intense and strong, I couldn’t just keep walking without a quick glance over my shoulder. He was standing there with the blonde girl at his side, looking overwhelmed.

‘’It’s an amazing place,’’ I distractedly said as I sat down, praying that Roman wouldn’t sit anywhere near us. I took the menu and my eyes scrolled over all the delicious food, getting hungry by just looking at the names. While being occupied with reading the menu, I felt people sitting at the table next to us.

‘’Have you decided yet?’’  

‘’Everything looks so nice, I can’t choose,’’ I laughed as I looked up. My eyes automatically wandered, finding Roman and his date sitting next to us. Lord why? My heart started to race, I felt myself getting hot; I was turning into a nervous wreck, scared that I might say something wrong or being too close with Bryson. I shouldn’t have these thoughts, especially when Roman was the one who ended things between us and moved on with his life as well.

‘’Are you okay?’’ Bryson asked.

‘’I’m fine,’’ I lied, biting my lip.

‘’Alright, I’ll take the steak with the salad.’’ He spoke as he put his menu down. ‘’What about you?’’

‘’I think I’m going for the spiced rice with vegetables.’’

‘’Sounds lovely,’’ he smiled and waved his hand at the waiter to tell her our orders. ‘’So, how have you been doing?’’

‘’I’ve been great. I took two weeks off though, I needed to help my friend with moving to his new place,’’ I said as I took a sip of my water.

‘’Is it Seth who’s moving?’’ Bryson asked. I could feel Roman’s eyes burning right through me, shifting in his seat lightly.

‘’Uhm yeah, it’s Seth who’s moving out,’’ I uncomfortably said. ‘’But how are you doing? How’s your job?’’ I quickly asked, trying to change the subject for both Roman and mine sake.

‘’Mine’s quite alright, just the usual. Had to explain why I was wearing a turtle neck to work the other day though,’’ He smirked, ‘’You left some marks on me which were quite visible that even your foundation couldn’t cover.’’ Bryson ran his hand through his hair as Roman almost chocked while drinking his water. ‘’I didn’t mind at all and if I could, I’d gladly show them, but when you work in an office, you gotta cover things like that up somehow.’’

‘’You’re right,’’ I smiled briefly, biting my tongue in the hope I would wake up from this nightmare. I carefully looked over to Roman, finding him frowning with his jaw clenched, obviously boiling with anger. His whole body tensed as Bryson intertwined our fingers and smiled. Roman couldn’t care less about the girl he was with, clearly not listening to her long dreaded stories she was enthusiastically sharing.

‘’I remember you having-,’’ he paused and got his phone out of his pocket, ‘’I gotta take this one, do you mind?’’ He asked. I shook my head, thanking god he couldn’t finish his sentence and smiled lightly. The waiter brought us the food right when Bryson answered the phone. I was happy because that meant I could focus on my dish instead of looking around awkwardly. It had been a long time since I’ve eaten this nice, praising the chef in my head while eating slowly. Suddenly, my phone vibrated. Thinking it must be Seth, I took my phone out of my purse. It was my turn to choke on my delicious food when I saw Roman’s name on my lock screen. He send me a text saying: ‘I wanna get underneath the table and make it hard for you to talk.’ I looked over to him and rolled my eyes. ‘’I’m sorry, it was my boss asking if I finished that project.’’

‘’It’s fine, don’t worry,’’ I said as I took another bite from my food.

‘’So back to our subject,’’ he smirked. Oh god no. I knew that if he would continue talking, Roman would defenitely say or do something to make him shut up and I’m not letting that happen.

‘’You know what, let’s talk about something else okay,’’ I suggested, sounding a little irritated. I looked at my phone again and Roman sent another text saying: ‘You look so ravishing baby, oh how I’ve missed seeing you like this.’ I ran my hand through my hair and decided to send him something back: ‘Stop it Roman.’ was all I typed before pressing send.

‘’You alright? It’s like you’re not really enjoying tonight.’’ Bryson concernedly spoke. ‘’If you wanna go, just tell me.’’

‘’No I’m fine,’’ I insisted, ‘’just have a lot on my mind, I’m sorry.’’

‘’Don’t be love, it’s all good,’’ he smiled. I could feel Roman looking at us from the corner of my eye, anger and frustration radiating off his body. This was going to be the most unpleasant dinner ever, I could tell.

——————–

‘’I wish they served bigger portions,’’ Bryson mocked as he wiped the corners of his mouth with the napkin. Throughout the dinner, Roman never stopped sending those text messages, he continued those looks and it drove me insane.  ‘’Anyways, I’m going to pay okay, be right back.’’ He smiled and walked to the cash register. I was getting myself ready to leave as I heard Roman’s date saying she had to use the restroom. Once she was gone, Roman shoved his chair so he was sitting next to me at the table.

‘’Who’s that,’’ he nodded Bryson’s way, clearly irritated. I rolled my eyes and sighed. ‘’What?’’

‘’Do you seriously expect me to tell you after not even try to contact me in those four months? Speaking of contact, why the hell did you sent me those texts?’’ I hissed.

‘’I think I have the right to know,’’ He spoke dangerously low. ‘’If I wouldn’t say anything, I’d be fooling myself.’’  He kept his eyes on mine. I was quiet for a moment until he broke the silence, ‘’Come with me to my place, let me explain everything.’’

‘’You honestly think I’m agreeing on that? Look, like I said, I haven’t seen or spoken to you in four months Roman. I can’t just ignore everything that happened.’’

‘’I’m not asking you to ignore anything,’’ he looked at Bryson who was still busy paying. I think it’s better to have this conversation at my place unless you want to be disturbed by that jerk.’’ He said annoyed. I sighed and threw my head back. ‘’Please y/n, I promise you, you won’t regret it.’’

‘’What am I supposed to say to him?’’

‘’We can also just leave,’’ his low voice spoke, making me shiver. He noticed and slightly smirked as he scooted his chair closer to me. He looked over his shoulder to see if Bryson was still busy. ‘’You coming with me?’’ he asked once again. I was gonna hate myself for the decision I was about to make. I closed my eyes briefly and nodded. I’m still weak when it comes to Roman. He sighed in relieve and stood up. ‘’Let’s go.’’

‘’I gotta tell Bryson first, I ain’t leaving like this.’’ I said as I stood up. Roman looked at me worriedly. ‘’I’ll be right back,’’ I reassured him. As I was about to walk over to Bryson, Roman grabbed my hand and made me turn around. ‘’What’s wrong?’’

‘’Nothing, it’s just…’’ He bit his lip and looked at me up and down, ‘’You look so luscious.’’

‘’I’ll be right back,’’ I lightly smiled and walked over to Bryson while wearing my coat. ‘’Hey, I just bumped into a friend of mine and we wanted to catch up, we haven’t seen each other in ages.’’

‘’Oh,’’ he looked a little disappointed, ‘’um alright I think.’’ He smiled and gave me a hug. ‘’Have fun. I hope you enjoyed dinner.’’

‘’Thank you and I did, thanks for everything.’’ I waved at him as he exited the place. I couldn’t help but feel guilty towards him. As I turned around Roman was standing right behind me. ‘’What about your beautiful date?’’ I asked.

‘’I left her some money and told her to do with it what she wanted. She seemed happier when I gave her the money than taking her out on a date.’’ He chuckled. I shook my head and grinned, walking outside with Roman following behind me. I made my way towards his car and waited for him to unlock the doors. ‘’Seems like you still remember,’’ he said as he sat down.

‘’Something such as your car makes quite a statement.’’ I said as I fastened my seatbelt. He chuckled.  I inhaled the familiar scent of his car; it still smelled new with a touch of peach. I looked around and saw he still had the car mat I gave him. Roman once spilled his drink while I was driving his car so I decided to buy another mat for him and he was so happy once he discovered it. I smiled at the memory and looked out of the window as he started to drive towards his house. What used to be a car filled with stories, laughter and sometimes even the harmonious sound between our bodies colliding together, was no longer the case; not one word was being exchanged between the two of us. We drove into his street and a weird feeling came up, nostalgia came close to describe it. As we entered his house, all the memories came up again.

‘’You okay?’’ He asked. I nodded and walked towards him into the living room. ‘’You want anything to drink?’’ I shook my head and sat down on his couch. I had so much mixed feelings right now. ‘’Thank you for coming,’’ he started as he sat next to me.

‘’You’re welcome.’’ I quietly said.

‘’I made a huge mistake,’’ He whispered, ‘’the moment I let you go.’’

‘’And it took you four months to realize?’’ I huffed as I stood up. ‘’I fought for us Roman, I wanted things to work out between us. I knew I had to adapt myself to your lifestyle and I tried my hardest.’’

‘’I know you did, I saw how much you tried and I appreciated it but do you think I liked seeing you having trouble with trying?’’

‘’You could’ve accepted the fact that I did my best? You ended it just like that,’’ I teared up. ‘’I wanted to try, Roman. I never understood why you couldn’t.’’

‘’There was a reason why I ended things, y/n. You think I liked seeing you like that? Bursting out in tears whenever I left? Feeling obligated to stay with me?’’ He stood up and walked towards me. ‘’I never wanted you feel that way, I care about you too much.’’

‘’Yeah sure, if you cared about me at all, you would’ve tried.’’ I turned around so I was facing him.

‘’You know what they say; you don’t know what you have until it’s gone and I’ve realized I need you.’’ He spoke.

‘’After everything I’ve been through, you actually have the nerve to say that now?’’ I asked stunned, ‘’Are you being serious right now or are you playing some kind of sick game because this isn’t the slightest bit funny.’’ My voice full with frustration and disbelieve. It was like I had no control over my body as my hand flew upwards to meet his face. He was quick in action and prevented my hand making contact with his cheek. His large hand wrapped round my wrist easily

‘’What do you think you’re doing?’’ he asked angrily. He stepped closer to me so there wasn’t any space left between our bodies, my wrist still in his tight grip.

‘’I-I’m sorry, that wasn’t my intention,’’ I stuttered, shocked by what I just tried to do. ‘’I should go now.’’

‘’You’re not going anywhere babygirl.’’ His pupils were blown, pure lust and fury in his eyes. Hearing him call me like that after months, made me get goosebumps.  ‘’When I saw you with that guy in the restaurant, something snapped,’’ He wrapped his arm around my tiny waist, his beard brushed against my cheek as he whispered, ‘’no one gets to touch you like that, only me.’’ His deep voice spoke. Without warning he picked me up and threw me over his shoulder as he carried me upstairs.

‘’Roman put me down,’’ I said, trying to sound convincing. He chuckled and smacked my ass. I squealed and dug my nails in his back. Once we entered his familiar bedroom, he threw me on the bed with so much force that I bounced in the middle. He started to loosen up his tie as he hovered above me.

‘’You think you could just try to hit me huh?’’ Roman growled as he grabbed both of my wrists and pinned them above my head. ‘’You were wrong babygirl, actions have consequences.’’

‘’Roman I don’t think we should be doing this,’’ I breathed heavily as he tied my hands to the bedframe with his black tie. He smirked as his hands roamed over my whole body. I betrayed myself by letting out a muffled moan. Who was I fooling? I wanted him as much as he wanted me.

‘’I can stop if you want me to,’’ he whispered as he started to pull back. I shook my head and bit my lip. ‘’Tell me what you want,’’ he demanded, his lips touching mine lightly. I didn’t know what to think, say or do that moment. I missed everything about him; his smell, the way his body felt, his touch. I was completely overwhelmed by everything that was happening but you didn’t hear me complaining. ‘’I still haven’t heard anything yet.’’ He unbuttoned his shirt, throwing it across the room, leaving him shirtless.  

‘’Please Roman, I need you,’’ I admitted as I looked him in the eye. The words sounded familiar leaving my lips. Suddenly, I remembered something, something he always enjoyed hearing me say, his weakness. ‘’Please daddy,’’ I whispered. His eyes widened and I could tell his whole body language changed from need to lust. A low growl left his chest as he tore the dress off my body. I was about to complain about ruining my favorite gown, but when he looked me in the eye, I forgot about everything.

‘’Look at you,’’ he licked his lips and got rid of his pants, ‘’all merciful for me.’’ He bent down and unclasped my bra. ‘’Lay back baby, let daddy take care of you.’’

‘’Oh fuck,’’ I moaned as his lips closed around my right nipple, sucking slowly while looking at me. I threw my head back in pleasure, enjoying the way his touch felt against my heated body. His large hands lazily trailed to the waistband of my lace panties, slipping his hand inside. My body tingled as my sensitive bundle of nerves was being touched after so long.

‘’You’re already dripping babygirl, you missed daddy that much, didn’t you?’’ Roman murmured. I nodded, not being able to talk. His tongue left a wet trail from my collarbone to my ear, biting on my earlobe as he pushed his digits inside of me agonizingly slow. I gasped in pleasure as I felt my walls being stretched. Since we broke up, I haven’t been with anyone else. I haven’t craved anyone else their touch but his’.

‘’Fuck baby you’re so tight,’’ he groaned as he looked down. My back arched off the queen sized bed, breathing heavily. He pumped his fingers in and out of me slowly while biting down on my neck. ‘’You love riding daddy’s fingers, don’t you babygirl? You love it when I tell you not to cum, when I whisper dirty things in your ear that turn you on and only make you wetter,’’ his deep, rough voice whispered against my skin. ‘’Tell me, who does this pussy belong to?’’

‘’Y-you daddy,’’ I whimpered. He slowly added a third finger, making me scream in pleasure. I tried to wiggle my hands free from the knot he made so I could do something. I had no idea what, maybe grab his hair or the sheets, something. Once he felt my walls clench around his fingers, he stopped and gently pulled his fingers out of me, leaving me breathless. The heat in my lower abdomen got stronger as he licked his fingers and hummed in approval.

‘’Not yet baby,’’ was all he said as he got rid of my panties and spread my legs. He dove in between my thighs, kissing my drenched pussy like he was kissing me. My head fell back and my eyes closed, letting my other senses take over. His tongue circled my clit slowly before sucking on it gently, inserting his tongue in me right after. I could feel my climax already starting to form, he never had to do much to make me cum, his voice alone was enough.

‘’Roman I’m…so…fuck,’’ I moaned, not able to make a proper sentence. The pleasure he was giving me made me feel intoxicated. He hummed against me causing my hips to rise. He placed his strong arm around my waist, holding me down. ‘’I’m gonna cum,’’ I breathed heavily.

‘’Good girls ask for permission.’’ He said as he added his fingers back inside of me. I couldn’t postpone my orgasm longer so I had no choice.

‘’Can I cum please,’’ I whimpered, ‘’please daddy?’’

‘’Cum for daddy,’’ he smirked and delved his tongue further in my entrance, making me see stats. I haven’t felt this good in a long time. He licked his lips as he crawled back up to kiss me. I groaned when I tasted myself as his tongue slipped in my mouth. We kissed for a good five minutes or so, all the anger, sadness and frustration seemed to have disappeared. I was stalking for myself; Roman, at the other hand, was still frustrated and I could tell by his whole body language. Besides, I know him too well.

As he pulled back, we were both breathing heavily while looking at each other. He climbed off his bed, pulling his pants down along with his boxers. My mouth watered as my eyes fell from his eyes to his dick. ‘’You missed daddy’s dick?’’ He purred as he started to stroke himself while walking to the side of the bed. I nodded and wiggled my hips. He chuckled and climbed back on the bed again, knees next to my body so his dick almost touching my lips. ‘’Suck it,’’ he demanded. I stuck my tongue out and licked the tip, making his head fall back. One hand found his way in my hair as the other started to rub my pussy again. ‘’Ah fuck babygirl, I missed that little mouth of yours,’’ he grunted as I moaned. I could hardly focus as he slowly rubbed my pussy. My mouth closed over his dick, sucking slowly, each time taking more of him. I looked up at him; his eyes shut in pleasure, his whole body tensed. I could feel his dick throb so I knew he was close to cum. He hissed and yanked my hair back, bending down to kiss me. ‘’You want me inside of you?’’  

I nodded, watching him walk to the end of his bed, his eyes never leaving mine. I felt so vulnerable but safe at the same time. He positioned himself between my legs, rubbing his dick up and down against my wet slit. He pushed  himself inside of me slowly. I gasped at how big he felt; like he was doing me for the very first time. ‘’Jesus y/n you’re fucking tight,’’

‘’Oh fuck,’’ I whispered. He kept his slow pace going for a while, letting me adjust to his size. After he felt like I was stretched enough, he lifted my leg onto his shoulder and started to vigorously thrust, literally taking my breath away. My head started to spin, my body tingled and I knew I wasn’t going to last long. Neither was Roman.

‘’Ain’t nobody ever told you who your real daddy is?’’ he growled, ‘’You’re mine and I ain’t letting you go anymore,’’

I moaned at the heartwarming yet extremely hot statement he made. This man is just too amazing for words and I’ve missed him. So much. ‘’I’m so close,’’ I moaned. He lightly smiled and started to rub my clit in fast motions. ‘’Oohh myy goddd.’’ My voice grew louder, my insides started to clench around him, the heat in my lower abdomen was starting to build; signing that I was close to another orgasm. Roman noticed and I could tell he was also on the verge by the way his thrusts became sloppy and slow, his breathing became heavier. His dick started to throb inside of me, pushing against my walls which created this incredibly pleasurable feeling.

‘’Cum for daddy babygirl,’’ he moaned.

‘’Romann,’’ I cried out his name as my orgasm shattered throughout my entire body. Roman followed shortly after; his dick twitching inside of me while moaning my name. As I opened my eyes, his hands were placed at either side of my face. I smiled at him and he gave me one in return as he untied my hands. ‘’I think I’ll have to stay the night,’’ I spoke as I snuggled up against him under the covers. He chuckled and placed his arm around me.

‘’I’m really sorry y/n, about everything,’’ he genuinely said, ‘’I’m sorry I hurt you and I’m sorry for not accepting that you tried.’’

‘’That’s all in the past now Ro,’’ I answered him.

‘’Good to hear, because I was thinking,’’ he looked at me and caressed my cheek, ‘’maybe we should try again?’’

He patiently waited for my answer. Not that I had to think about it, I just wanted to make him sweat. ‘’Alright, let’s try.’’ I smiled. He kissed me and intertwined our fingers.

‘’I promise you, you won’t regret it y/n, I love you.’’ He sealed his words with a passionate kiss and we both drifted off. 

——————–
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Broken Dreams

MASTERLIST

A/N: This was requested by my lovely @lovethatmendeskid and I just loved the idea. I’m super nervous, legit shaking. I really hope you like it!

Word count: 3,502

I was sitting at the dining table in the kitchen, staring over at the full plate of - by now – very cold food. Food that – once again – weren’t going to be eaten.

I’d been sitting here for hours, but I stopped counting exactly how many that had passed by now. The more seconds that flew by, the more it stung in my heart.

Keep reading

Queen || Draco Malfoy x Reader

{summary: sometimes, you fall in love with the person you least expect to be with.}

I’ve been working on the peter parker request for days now, yet still can’t find the muse to finish it and post it. So here, have this draco malfoy story instead.

this isn’t my best work like at all. I just wanted to do something to challenge myself because it’s been a rough day for me, and I find that writing always helps with making me happier.

warnings: language, and draco is going to be an annoying cunt for the first few parts of this story before turning sweet with age. draco malfoy (from what I remember with the books) is spoiled and likes to believe that the whole world is meant to be handed to him on a silver platter.

Love won’t come so easily between him and the reader, and if the subject of bullying triggers you, then please, do not read this story.

also, if you hate the enemies to lovers trope, this is definitely not the story for you.

ps house of gold is a MASTERPIECE.

word count: 4,100+

**dont repost/plagiarize this story**

——

Keep reading

I Can’t Lose Her

Part 1 (It’s really not that necessary to read it to understand what’s going on); Part 2; Part 3; Part 4; Part 5


Kim Jongdae (Chen) x Reader

Summary: Your parents gave you up so you had no choice but to become his wife.

Genre: Mafia AU, angst

Word count: 4,334 I went all out with this one 😂

Originally posted by sehunicorne

Jongdae’s POV


8 years ago

“Jongdae take a look at this,” my father said handing me a file with a bunch of papers in it.

“Darling, I don’t think you should show him this yet, he’s too young,” my mother interrupted.

“He’s has to take over the family business sooner or later, besides he already knows a lot of stuff, might as well learn how to deal with the ones indebted to us.”

My mother didn’t say anything just looked at me and went out of the room. I picked up the file and opened it. It wasn’t a big case, just some husband and wife who owns my father money because of gambling in one of his casinos. I have no idea why he would give me this, it seemed boring. My father noticed that.

“They don’t owe me that much compared to some other big shots but what I really dislike about them is the fact that they tried to run away…”

I wondered what he meant before I turned the page and saw that they’re now in completely different city. What fools. Do they really think they can escape my father this easily, he has eyes everywhere and they’re just amateurs. I understood that my father probably wants to go pay them a visit and I would gladly accompany him. I turned another page to see what they look like and to my surprise they had daughters. The older one in particular caught my attention, even though her face was expressionless, her features were delicate. I took the photo out.

“What about them?” I asked him, he picked up the picture and looked at it closely.

“We can use them to our advantage. Threatening is always easier when they have family members to worry of,” my father started laughing creepily, something that even made me feel unsettling. He stood up and called one of the drivers before gesturing for me to follow him.

“Are we actually going there now?” I questioned and he nodded. I got into the back seat of the car and checked my clock. We will probably arrive there in about 4 hours. I didn’t speak to my father anything else because honestly I preferred not to know what he’s planning. The car ride there felt like it will never end but once we were there I somehow started getting nervous. It was already dark outside and as soon as my father’s men began sprinting up the stairs the nervousness was soon replace by a pure sense of adrenaline. They kicked the door to one of the apartments open and went inside, searching for inhabitants, I wanted to go help them but my father told me to stay in the back. I saw how they ushered one man and three women to the tiny living room. I wondered how could somebody live in a place like this. My father steeped out from the shadows and I could already hear the two parents whimpering.

“Please, you have got it all wrong,” the man said.

“We were planning on paying you back,” the woman continued.

“Shut up,” my father said, pushing the two girls so they were on their knees, facing their parents. Even though their backs were to me, I immediately recognized the older one. I watched her hair go down her back and as she straighten herself I had to control my urge to come up to her.

“Please enlighten me how I’m wrong,” my father continued to mock them. “Because you clearly thought you can get away with all of the money I gave you. That’s not how this works.”

They all stayed silent for a moment and I heard another sob. It wasn’t from her though. She took the younger ones hand and whispered something to her.

“So what should I do with you all?” he asked expecting me to answer.

“Scare them a little?” I replied not sure if that’s the answer he wanted.

“Great idea!” he said, setting the gun against the back of her head. And then the quiet cries started again but by the way she was still kneeling I knew none of it is from her. She just squeezed the younger ones hand more tightly and I heard her mother say that everything is going to be okay but all of us knew it won’t and I don’t know what was going on in my head at that moment, I never dared defy my father like that.

“Wait!” I shouted and he turned to me, I had to say what I wanted quickly to avoid annoying him further. “Not this one,” I finally spoke. “The other,” I said, pointing to the younger one.

“As you wish,” my father said. I saw her turn to her sister in an attempt to stop him but the shot was already fired and only the echoes of the sound resonated along the room. Everyone was dead silent as they watched the body fall to the ground.

“Let’s go,” my father said, already going to the door. My eyes met hers seemingly for a split second but I could already see how they turned from frightened to pure hatred as she went to her sister’s lifeless body. I heard her cry for the first time as she held it. I quickly turned around. I have no idea why but extreme guilt washed over me.

“Shit,” I thought to myself going out. I couldn’t get the powerful look she gave me out of my head.  I realized that at that moment I fell in love with her.


6 year, 4 months

For the next almost two years there wasn’t a day I didn’t think about her. I wanted to meet her so badly but I knew it would never be possible after what happened. I spent my days gathering all the information I could possibly get on her. Her name especially stuck with me. I remember attending her sister’s funeral and watching her from one of the trees from a distance. Even being so far away from here I could see she had no emotion on her face. I knew that this is partly my fault but I never felt more grateful that my father listened to me on that day. After a few months, I found out that she started working to help repay her parents debts. Whenever I went to the café she worked at I was always too scared to go inside, thinking she will recognize me. At this point I knew I’m becoming quite obsessed with her but I just had to see her. Get closer somehow. My father’s health got significantly worse and I had to take care of a lot of more things nowadays but I had inside eyes even in her school. I felt like trashing the office I already had when I found out that someone is actually bullying her. I had to go there myself. Luckily on that day she wasn’t even at school. I chuckled when I saw how everyone stared at me as I pulled up in an expensive car in front of the building. I went straight to the principal and him knowing my father, well promised not to interfere. I slammed the door to her classroom open and called the bullies out. They of course didn’t want to go anywhere with me but just with a snap of my fingers, my father’s men were already at them.  Their squirms of pain and asks for forgiveness were music to my ear, as I tortured them myself in one the warehouses owned by us. Every day I was getting more and more like my father. I wondered if she ever found out where they suddenly disappeared to. I couldn’t let her be in that school anymore, so after a long argument I finally won and she was supposed to get transferred by getting a scholarship to the private school I attended. I could barely contain my excitement at the thought of seeing her more often.


4 years ago

It made me quite happy to know that she’s the introverted type. Less guys approached her, less trouble for them and for me. I have heard that she needed some really persuasive convincing so she would actually go this school. Knowing her, it didn’t surprise me she found this suspicious. I stared at her from the third floor window, reading a book by one of the trees. She looked as beautiful as ever. Our uniform fit her well.

“Are you watching her again?” Baekhyun approached me. “Man, you’re so creepy.”

“Shut up, it’s none of your business.”

He raised his hands in defence.

“Relax, I’m not taking her, even though she’s a great catch but seeing how everything is going, you’re not going to get her anytime soon either,” he laughed but I quickly silenced him with a punch to his stomach. He fell down on the floor and I lifted him up by the collar.

“You dare say something like that about her again.”

“No need to get violent. Anyone would be stupid to try to do that. Do you think I want to die? You’re scary when you’re jealous,” he said swatting my hand away and standing up. “Speaking about that. I heard that some guy from her class confessed to her the other day, she rejected him though-“

But I wasn’t listening anymore. How dare someone do that. I knew who it was. I saw him trying to get all friendly with her. Luckily it was still lunch break, I went to his table and dragged him away. I saw how frightened he got by the second. I was known as quite the scary one in the school, I just hoped that rumour never reached her.

“What, what is it?” he asked me when I slammed him to the wall in one of the corners. I didn’t say anything just took his arm and began twisting. He screamed in pain.

“Did you talk to Y/N the other day?”

“Y/N? I have no idea what you’re talking about,” I twisted his arm to the opposite direction a bit more.

“Okay yes. Yes I was.”

“She’s mine,” I told him as I finally heard the bone snap. He cried out in pain and fell to the floor. “You won’t tell anyone about this unless, you have a death wish,” I said, showing him my gun.

I went to the next lesson like nothing happened. I saw Baekhyun glance at me from his table. He asked if I took care of him and I nodded. I had another worry now, my graduation is soon and she still has two years of studying left.


2 years ago

My father’s sudden passing half a year ago left me with complete control of the gang but also all the worry and trouble it came with. Before this I never knew he was associated with the other families and how closely they worked together. I needed to learn again how to cooperate and work for a common goal. The many deals and jobs my father left me with meant that I couldn’t see her as often. I sometimes wondered why she’s still not here by my side. I had so much power in this city yet, I couldn’t just go and kidnap her. At least I knew that she also graduated. I literally thought about staying an extra year in school just to be near her but my mother convinced me otherwise. It made me quite sad when I found out, she never went to pursue a higher education, when she was one of the top graduates. After all these years, her parents never learned and still gambled. Even more so, after what happened. Her heart was too kind, they didn’t deserve her. She worked two jobs just to take care of them and also pay up the debt. I wonder how she felt knowing that she’s sending the money to her sister’s killer. One day thinking about this I came up with a perfect plan to finally make her mine.


9 months ago

“You know it will never work,” Minseok said as soon as I explained to him what I was planning. “She will find out sooner or later.”

Every single one of them told me that. Why did I even bother explaining. I’m going to go through with it anyway. I have been waiting for so long as it is.

“Then I better make sure she doesn’t,” I said, putting my jacket on and going to the door.

“Jongdae don’t be stupid, she’s just a girl…”

“She’s special. You haven’t seen her on that day.”

I knew why they didn’t like this idea from the start, it was mostly because they didn’t want me to get hurt by her or get hurt while protecting her. Stupid reasons. I called my family’s lawyer and he promised to get the documents ready by the end of the month. I went back to my apartment and fell down on the bed. The room next to mine was still empty but I could already imagine her being there.


5 months ago

I picked up the papers and the photos I gathered of her throughout all these years. I wanted to burn them, get rid of them but I somehow couldn’t bring myself to do it. She looked so pretty and cute in all of them. I opened the secret drawer and put all of them in there. Today was the day. Her parents agreed to meet me as soon as I told them what I want. They welcomed me warmly and they nodded eagerly when I told them I’m willing to pay off their debt. It disgusted me how easily they accepted my offer to exchange money for their daughter, I tried not to show them this because I was also extremely happy everything is going so well. They didn’t question why I’m even doing this and that was enough for me. As I shook their hands and they signed the papers, I heard the front door of their apartment open. And there she was, almost in the same place I first met her, looking as stunning as ever in her work dress. I stood up immediately and took a few steps to her. She glanced at me then at her parents.

“Who’s this?” she asked, her voice sweet and soothing.

“Y/N this is Jongdae, you will have to come with him,” her mother explained.

“Jongdae?” she questioned and for a second, I thought she will recognize me. “Why should I go with him?”

“We just made a perfect deal and got a lot of money from him,” she was shocked by the answer.

“And you’re selling me off just like that?!” she shouted. “He could be a human trafficker for all I know, how dare you!”

I couldn’t stay here any longer, I needed to get away from her parents before I punched them in the face. I grabbed her by the arm and went to the door.

“Mother,” she cried out.

“Don’t worry Y/N! He promised to take care of you,” she shouted after her.

“Let go of me,” she said, as I took her to the car. She seemed quiet on the outside but I absolutely loved how feisty she actually is. I had no idea how to take her to the headquarters without her escaping, so I handcuffed her to one of the handles inside of the car.

“What the hell are you doing? Is this a kidnapping?” she began trashing around but abruptly stopped when she noticed my gun. I saw that she was at least a bit scared but she tried her best not to show it.

I took her to one of the rooms in the headquarters and sat her on the bed.

“Y/N I want to marry you,” I finally told her. She looked at me in disbelief.

“Are stupid or something? There was no way I’m getting married.”

And so it began. I tried to convince her multiple times and I didn’t know it was even possible but she started to annoy me to no end. Maybe this won’t be as easy as I thought it would be. I came back to the room again after a while and panicked when I couldn’t see her in it. I ran to the bathroom and saw that she’s climbing into the ventilation shaft. That was it. I dragged her out roughly and flung her over my shoulder. I left her downstairs and went to my room to calm down. I shoved everything off my table, it was easier taking it out on something. I knew I can’t show her my temper and how I actually am if I ever want to gain her trust and I needed that but most of all I needed her. I stayed away for a few hours before coming back to her. I signalled my men to leave us alone. I came up to her and saw that she’s sleeping. She looked so adorable I just wanted to pick her up and hold her close. And so I did but she woke up soon after. She stared at me with those beautiful eyes of her and her cheeks turned a cute shade of pink when I complimented her. I felt bad threatening her but she really had no more than two options. Even though I could never kill her. I watched the tears stream down her face. And here I thought I will never see that happening again. I wiped them off and after all these years of waiting, kissed her.


3 months ago

I couldn’t help but chuckle when I told her I stopped locking the door to her room days ago. I couldn’t bring myself to do it anymore. But she was even more shocked when I told her I’m taking her to party. She was gorgeous in the dress I got her that I froze to my spot. She came up to me and fixed my tie and when she looked up, she seemed so innocent, I couldn’t believe I’m lying to her. I was about to tell her everything right there on the spot, thank God one of my men saved me. I know how much she would hate me if she ever found out the truth and by now, I would probably die if she left me. I still hated the plan they come up with even though it was perfect. She was beautiful, who wouldn’t get distracted by her. I gave her a necklace with a tracker in it and prayed that she won’t get in any trouble so I wouldn’t need to use it. Unfortunately that was not going to happen. When Junmyeon came in and told me that Jimin took her to the roof I completely ignored the deal we were making and everyone in the room and ran out as fast as I can. If he as much as touched her. I don’t care if I get this war started. I kicked the door open and saw that he had her cornered. I would have killed him but somehow I was afraid to shoot someone if front of her, thinking it will trigger something. And I was right when all of it was over and she came to me that night I knew what she dreamt of.


1 month ago

I was trying to convince her to work with me for the past two months. I wanted to keep her nearby but I knew she would never accept it. She hated violence. One day she even asked me about her parents. It surprised me how much she still cared about them. As each day went by after I gave her the key to go out whenever she wanted and I saw her smile more often, it was harder to control myself. I didn’t want to push her but I loved her so much and I wanted her to know that.


Yesterday;  7 am

I woke up early because only now did I remembered that I never got her that wedding ring. What kind of a husband am I. I sat up in my bed and picked up my phone. I already had 3 missed calls. Two from Chanyeol, one from Minseok. What do they want so early in the morning? I had to go find that ring. I peeked inside her room before I went out. She looked so peaceful and cute while she slept. I could never get enough of seeing her this way.


Yesterday; 12 am

I came back after four hours and she still was asleep. I went to my office and checked my phone. 10 more missed calls. I had no plans of talking to them today, no matter how important it was. I took my cheque book and couldn’t help but take a peek at the photos I still had underneath. I still couldn’t believe I got so lucky to finally have her.


Yesterday; 10 pm

I came back as soon as I got the ring and went to the balcony with her. I knew she enjoyed the view. I didn’t know where to start, so I kept quiet for a moment, enjoying her presence.

“Jongdae, did something happen?” she asked me and I saw that she was actually worried. I turned around and practically begged her to let me put the ring on. Now she really was mine and everyone will be able to see that. I couldn’t believe she was just as happy as I am. I took her hands in mine.

 “You may have already noticed it but I’m utterly and extremely in love with you,” I told her and she began blushing. I didn’t know what to expect after that but I certainly didn’t think she would pull me in and kiss me. She kissed me. Herself. I slid my hands down her back to her waist when freaking Minseok came in and ruined the moment. As much as I didn’t want to leave her, I knew one against eleven is not a good fight. I told her not to wait up and kissed her on the forehead before going after Minseok.


Present Day; 6 am

I was so sick of this meeting and all this bullshit. I just wanted to go back home to her and hug her so tight and kiss her all over.

“Jongdae are you listening? I’m not going to repeat it for the third time,” Junmyeon said, pointing at the white board near him.

“Yeah yeah,” I told him. “So what if BTS started to move, do you seriously think we can’t beat them?”

“That’s not the point, they have allies,” he sighed before standing up. “I think we have been discussing this for too long now. The meeting is over. We will meet up later today. Don’t be late, especially you,” he said pointing at me.

I was the first one to get out of the room and was almost running to the elevator when Sehun caught up with me. I really didn’t want to speak with him right now.

“Did you hear?” he asked, stopping me.

“What?”

“Strange. I thought you will be going out for blood by now.”

“Just tell me what it is. I’m in a hurry.”

“There are some rumours going on around in the black market that Jimin issued a reward for someone who will bring Y/N to him,” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.

“Are you serious? I have to get back home. Fast.”


Present Day; 8 am

I kept thinking why would he want her so badly the whole drive from the headquarters. But the want to finish what we started was stronger. I unlocked the door and went inside. I didn’t see here anywhere down stairs, so maybe she was still sleeping. As I was going up I saw that my office door is slightly open.

“Y/N are you in there?” I asked, pushing them. I saw her kneeling behind the table. She looked up at me with those same eyes I saw 8 years ago that turned from frightened to pure anger and hatred.

“Fuck,” was the only thing I could think of. “I fucked up.”

“Care to explain what’s the meaning of this?” she said, coming up and throwing all the papers at me. Honestly, I didn’t know what to say. If she found this, she already knew everything. Why the hell I never got rid of them. She took hold of my shirt and tugged at me roughly.

“I only have one thing to ask you,” she said. “Were you really there when my sister was shot to death?”

She stared at me and I kept silent.

“I can’t believe this,” tears already formed in the corner of her eyes. “I can’t believe I was about to fall for a man who is responsible for my sister’s death.”

She let go of me and ran downstairs but I caught up to her.

“Y/N listen, if it wasn’t her it would have been you! I could never let that happen.”

She turned around and slapped me hard across the face. It hurt but I deserved that.

“And who gave you the right to decide?” she shouted and ripped the silver necklace off her neck before running out through the door. Shit if she doesn’t have that on, I won’t be able to find her.

“Y/N!! Baby wait!!”

I chased after her but she was unbelievably fast. I wondered how is that even possible since she was wearing heels. I ran after her for good fifteen minutes when I lost sight of her in the crowds of people. I punched the nearby wall with all my might, making my knuckles bleed.  I set my head against it’s coldness.  It can’t end this way. I can’t lose her now.


A/N: Dun dun duuuun, turns out Jongdae is an obsessive stalker

The Wooden Bead - Jeff Atkins x Reader

Request - “Hello can I request a very tomboy and boyish reader x Jeff?”

(I’m English so i don’t know if this will be any kind of inaccurate, I’ve struggled with using ‘soccer’ here instead of ‘football’, sorry if there are any mishaps. Also I hope this is kind of what you envisioned!)


“PARSONS, OVER HERE! PARSONS I’M OPEN GODDAMMIT!” You screamed at your teammate, who was refusing to pass you the ball.
“DON’T FUCKING PASS IT TO KING! Oh, you fucking did it. Idiot.” You spoke more to yourself.

—–

“What the hell, Parsons? You saw I was free but you blatantly ignored me?” You confronted the stocky girl in front of you. Although much smaller than her, you packed a mean punch and would be happy to show anyone what happens when they cross you. You weren’t really into stereotypically ‘girly’ things, you were more boyish in your mannerisms, look, and activities, but stereotypes in general pissed you off, despite the fact you probably fit quite well into the tomboy category.

“Sorry, I just didn’t feel like passing to you, L/N.” she brushed you off. You scoffed. She was unbelievable.

“You knew I was your best bet. I can’t believe you lost that for us.” You shook your head.

“It’s not my fault you can’t play soccer, L/N. there’s no hiding Coach’s charity case this year.” Romelda Parsons spat. There was no such thing as Coach letting on a charity case each year, she was just trying to intimidate you. The snooty brunette girl had been jealous ever since you’d joined the team, purely because you were so much better than her - maybe the best on the team, and coach paid far more attention to you than to her.

You were ready to show her.
“You little-” an arm eased you back, and another was put up to Parsons face.

“Easy, easy.” A smooth, calm voice interrupted your angry thoughts and soothed your boiling blood.

“Fuck off, Atkins.” Parsons gritted her teeth at the well-built honey-skinned boy holding you back.

“PARSONS! Over here now please!” Coach beckoned Romelda, and she almost snarled her teeth before walking off to talk to him.

The boy in front of you turned to face you. His blue eyes smiled at you while his lips did the same. He was wearing baseball gear, which fitted his muscles snugly. There was no denying the fact that he was insanely attractive.

You’d seen this boy around lots.

Jeff Atkins.

Loved by everyone, baseball player, popular, and you thought; way out of your league.

“You okay?” He asked with concern laced in his eyes.

“I can fight my own battles, thanks.” You muttered slightly, but stared him down nonetheless, you couldn’t let him know he phased you.

“That’s what I was worried about,” he chuckled. “1. You absolutely wreck Romelda, 2. Coach sees, 3. You get in trouble, 4. Maybe get a suspension, 5. I don’t see you playing soccer.” He smirked before continuing, “I can tell you pack a mean punch in there, Romelda wouldn’t stand a chance.”

You pretend to ignore everything he was saying, but really you were drinking in every detail.

“I know she wouldn’t.” You said defiantly.

You paused while you watched the way he grinned at your words and scratched his chin.

“I didn’t think Baseball practice was now?” You mused.

“It’s not.”

So, what was he doing nosing in your business anyhow?

“Why are you here?” You crossed your arms, your team had dissipated back to the changing rooms by now, and it was just you and Jeff on the field.

“I like to watch the girls soccer.”

“You perv!”

“Not like that! It’s just, you’re an awesome player and I hold great admiration for you, watching you play fuels me to play my own game.” He explained.

“Don’t be silly.” You scoffed.

“No, it sounds silly, but it isn’t. There’s something so clear about your passion that just makes me want to live my life.” He smirked, noticing your expression. “Don’t laugh at me, L/N.”

He knew your name??? He was just a boy from school, a boy way out of your league, who you’d never imagined knew of your existence. But instead, he was a boy who watched every soccer practice, complimented your play, and knew your name. You had to play it cool.

“I’ll keep a straight face, Atkins.”

“I should be off, we’ll be practicing soon and I wanna get a few hits in myself before the team comes, but thanks for entertaining me.” He started off, and you felt a pang of disappointment as he turned his back to you.

“Oh, and Y/N? That goal was incredible. Best thing I’ve seen in days.”

—-

It had been a few days since Jeff Atkins had saved your arch nemesis’ life, and incidentally pervaded into your life. He smiled at you in the corridors now, and you could’ve sworn he even winked once. On Tuesday, after a few judgemental comments about your clothing, you found a note in your locker;

You always look awesome Y/N. In fact, i might have to steal some clothes sometime. -J

Which you could only assume was from the man himself. On Thursday, Atkins slipped you the last chocolate muffin in the cafeteria. And on Friday, you had practice again.

Your play was slacking, your usual fire was off and you were distracted.

“L/N- pay attention! Ball coming your way!” Jess warned. You kicked your foot out just in time, but the hit was poor. You continually looked up at the bleachers, hoping to see Jeff watching you, but to no luck. His no show disappointed you.

—-

“What is wrong with you today, Y/N?” Jess caught you up after practice. She was clearly concerned.

“I don’t know, Jess, I guess today isn’t my day.” You sighed.

“You drop your lucky charm or something?”

“Something like that.”

The team left for the changing rooms and you slumped on the bottom row of the bleachers.

“So a lucky charm, huh?” You immediately knew the voice coming from above you. You turned and saw Jeff coming down the steps.

“I don’t have one.” You were blunt, you needed to remind yourself not to get feelings for a boy so out of your league.

“Maybe you should get one, you looked in need of one.” He slumped down next to you.

“Thanks, I appreciate the compliment.” The sarcasm dripped from your tongue.

“Not because you played badly by any means, but because you looked a little lost out there today.”

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me, my brain doesn’t appear to be working recently.”

Jeff dropped a wooden bead in your hand. It was nothing special, simple, wooden, spherical, with a hole in the middle. A plain wooden bead.

“Uh, thanks?” There was question in your voice.
He chuckled.

“It’s your new lucky charm. Don’t lose it, I promise it’ll help you win the match next week.” Sincerity coated his words and his eyes bore into yours, with a jokey overtone.

“I will keep it close. But I might wash it first, if you found it on the floor.” Of course, you didn’t really care where it had been, and you wouldn’t really wash it, but you were curious as to where it had appeared from.

“Don’t worry, it wasn’t on the floor.” He chuckled again, and started to stand. “I’ll see you around, L/N. Keep an eye out for me at the match.” He winked before walking off.

—–

You squeezed the bead tightly before placing it back in your gym bag. The game was starting, and you were not ready.

Obviously, all your nerves went out the window after your third goal of the match, at only 20 minutes in.

You won, which was no surprise to everyone, except you. You spotted Jeff making his way down the stairs and ran up to meet him.

“You were right! I can’t believe it worked!” You shone like the sun from happiness.

“I hate to say I told you so.” His eyes sparkled at you.

“It’s insane, you’re magic!” You mocked, feigning shock.

“What can I say?”

You smiled at each other for a moment, basking in your happiness.

“Actually, can I admit something embarrassing?” His tone turned awkward.

“You’re not magic?” You joked. He laughed.

“No, um, actually I was really nervous to talk to you. Seeing Romelda and you at each other’s throats the other weeks sent me into immediate rescue mode, (not that you need rescuing), and I didn’t realise until the adrenaline had worn off that I’d actually ended up speaking to you, but by that point I was too far in my rescue.”

You laughed at the idea of Jeff Atkins being scared to talk to you.

“You’re just so cool. You don’t care what anyone thinks, you’re passionate, you’re an amazing player, I love your style, not to mention how smart and gorgeous you are.”
“What I admire most is honestly, how badass you are.”

You blushed, taking compliments was a struggle.

“Jeff stop messing, it’s not funny.” You rolled your eyes playfully.

“I’d never- this is the most embarrassing part-” he took a deep breath, “I sorta like you.”

You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. Jeff Atkins? Likes you?

“You do?” Was all you could think to respond with.

“Yes.” He breathed, and moved closer to you.

“Is this-” he asked as he leaned in toward your face and cupped his hand on your cheek. You nodded forcibly in consent, before he pushed his lips onto yours.

After a while, and with regret, you broke off.

“But- you’re so out of my league.” You breathed, doubting yourself.

“I play baseball, Y/N, leagues are my thing.”

——
——

“Jeff! Please tell me you sent out the invites on your way home!” You screamed downstairs at your boyfriend.

“Of course I did!” He shouted back up.

You threw various wedding catalogues off the bed to reach the top you’d been looking for, before throwing it on.

“You ready babe?” Jeff yelled at you.

“Just coming!” You yelled back, before pulling out from under your top, a string, with a plain wooden bead on it.

Request: My Whole World

Request: Can you write one where the reader is being really petty towards dean for something he did and he gets fed up in a cute and fluffy way please.

Request: Could you write one where the reader is taking a nap and she’s pregnant and wakes up to dean talking to her stomach and it’s just all fluffy and cute

Word Count: 1,673

Thank you! I hope it’s what you were hoping for. Lots of love<3

“So anyway,” You continue, dipping the spoon back into the ice-cream carton and digging out another generous mouthful, “I get into the kitchen and he’s sat there, just munching on the last cookie. I’m not even kidding. I’d been craving them for weeks and I’d finally managed to convince his protective, overbearing ass to take me out to pick up the ingredients and he eats the last bloody one.”

Sam eyes the carton, balanced precariously atop your growing bump, and smiles a little, “He can be rude sometimes.”

“I know, right? And he acts like it’s nothing, like I haven’t been dragging his spawn around inside me for… what, seven and a half months?” You sigh dramatically, “All I wanted was a cookie and now all I have is…”

“Ice-cream?” Sam quirks an eyebrow with an amused smile, but you just shoot him a sardonic glare.

“It isn’t what I want. And you and Dean are so close, this might as well be your spawn too, so watch what you’re saying.” You manage to get the spoonful of ice-cream into your mouth just in time to point the spoon at him accusatorially, but he only laughs at you – it’s been like this for nearly three days now, considering that you’re not exactly on speaking terms with Dean unless it involves backrubs or food.

“I’m sure he feels awful.” Sam attempts, picking up another plate and setting it in the warm, soapy water of the sink – baby-proofing efforts are fully underway in the bunker, which, according to Sam, means turning the place into a clean, half-decent child-rearing environment. The brothers are so concerned with making it completely perfect and safe that you’ve barely had anything to do with it, which you’re perfectly fine with at this point.

“No, he doesn’t. He feels bad that I’m grumpy with him. But he enjoyed that cookie, and I know it.” You narrow your eyes, “They were damn good cookies.”

Sam turns to you after a moment, “Y/N, can I say something without you… spontaneously bursting into tears or throwing your ice-cream at me?”

“Probably not, but go on.” You nod, scraping out the bottom of the carton and giving him a roguish grin. He offers a small, though hesitant, smile, drying his hands off on the towel draped over the oven door handle.

“I think you’re scared. About Dean, about the baby, about everything.” He watches warily as your eyes narrow, and you sit forward slowly, a protective hand moving over your stomach as if his words could somehow hurt the tiny, helpless infant inside, “And I can’t help but wonder if you’re finding excuses to keep him at arm’s length so that if something does go wrong, he doesn’t blame himself. So he isn’t so hurt by losing one or both of you.”

“Sam-“ You try, but he has a way of reading you that not even Dean has managed to grasp – he really is your best friend, your brother in all but blood – in the least weird way, considering you’ve been with his biological brother for years.

“You’re going to be fine, Y/N. All three of you.”

“All four of us.” You correct, and he gives a conceding nod.

“All four of us. We have heaven and hell on our side, Y/N. Trust me on this one, alright?” He moves half a step closer to you, the smile on his face reminding you that he’s as excited as you are for this, and has mulled over every single one of the same possibilities, “We’ve gotten through everything else. This is just another adventure.”

You let the silence hang between you for a few moments, before hauling yourself to your feet and fixing him with a look that lets him know that he’s absolutely right, but that you’re less than impressed about it.

“One of these days, Sam Winchester, you’re going to tell someone a home truth that they really hate and you’re going to get punched.” You tell him, though the smile on your face instantly negates any kind of seriousness in your statement, “And fair warning, I am going to laugh.”

“Fair point.” He smiles, stepping forward to take your shoulders in his hands and press an affectionate kiss to your brow, “Go on, Y/N, get some rest. I’m almost done here.”

He can tell how obnoxiously tired you are, and even how hard you’re trying to hide it. It’s been a difficult transition, and one you’re still struggling with, going from reckless, active hunter, to careful, nurturing mother – though it’s one you’re more than willing to make.

“Alright, Sammy. I’m going for a nap.”

***

Naps have recently – even over the last three or four weeks – have become your primary source of sustenance. Depending on the hours that Winchester junior decides to make your bladder/ribs/kidneys into his or her personal trampoline, you’re not getting as much sleep as night as you perhaps should be, which means that the couch is your new favourite spot – these days, if either brother or anyone else needs to get a hold of you, that’s usually where you can be found.

When you find that the something pulling you from the warmth and comfort of sleep is Dean’s voice, you’re less than surprised – for a man who pretty much makes a living out of being sneaky and stealthy, he doesn’t half know how to make a racket (and then some) when he wants to. What you are more surprised to find is that, from where his voice is, he’s sat on the floor in front of you with his face up close to your shirt – more specifically, to your stomach.

“… And she’s stubborn; don’t ever try to get in her way. I’ve known her forever, and I’ve only actively disagreed with her once or twice. She’s clever, too. Probably too much for her own good. And beautiful – hopefully you’ll look a lot like her, but not too much, because then you’ll be charming the living shit out of everything in a five mile radius from the minute you’re born and none of us will stand a chance.”

He’s speaking in a low, soft tone that is difficult for even you to pick up at this point, but what you do feel is his hand lightly ghosting over your stomach – at first, you thought it was a bit odd, the way he’d like to randomly feel you up, but it eventually became more endearing than anything else.

“Another thing you’ve gotta watch out for with your mom is that she’s funny. Too funny, sometimes, like when we’re in a life or death situation and she comes out with a comment and man, does it piss off whoever – or whatever – we’re hunting and it distracts us all but it just makes the whole thing more bearable. But you’ll never know any of that, anyway, if we get our way. You deserve better, and I’ll be damned if that’s not what you’re going to get. Then again, I’m probably damned anyway.”  

He sighs softly, and after a moment, you feel his nose up against your skin.

“God, kid, I hope I don’t screw you up. I hope you get the childhood I couldn’t. I’d never be able to live with myself if you were scared for one minute of it.” He’s choked up, you realise, your heart skipping a beat and stomach lurching, “Kid, you are so, so loved. Whether your mom is pissed off at me or not; whether you know it or not, you two are the best thing that ever happened to me, and I promise you, you’re not going to forget that. And neither am I.”

There’s a long moment, and he takes a deep breath, obviously trying to collect himself – you’ve heard him speaking to the bump before, of course. He’s played music to it, cranking the volume up in the Impala as soon as he’d read in one of those books that the baby had hearing organs (‘Have to get their tastes refined early, Y/N. I refuse to have a child who can’t appreciate a bit of rock.’) and belting out lyrics even when it was just the two of you – but never like this. Never with that… vulnerability; never with that kind of feeling.

You prise one eye open, watching him for a few moments, “You really just can’t let me be mad at you for more than three and a half minutes, can you?”

His head snaps up and his eyes widen as he realises that you’re awake, and have been the whole time – his eyes are still shining and slightly glazed, but he plays it off by clearing his throat and giving you a small smile.

“So you’re not mad at me anymore? I can’t keep up.” He says softly, searching for your hand, and, once he finds it, he twines his fingers with yours sweetly.

“I was never mad at you. Well… not once the damage had been done.” You concede with a smile, slowly pushing yourself into a sitting position so he can come and sit beside you, one arm around your shoulders and the other hand still laced with yours.

“I’m sorry about the cookie. I’ll go and find more, Sam and I were thinking about-“

“It’s not about the damn cookie, Dean. Not even a little.” You interrupt, pulling your hand from his to hold his palm to your stomach, “I… was being dumb. And stupid. And rude. And it was uncalled for, whether I was being funny and petty over a cookie or not.”

“Is that an apology?” His eyes widen, but a grin spreads over his face as the baby kicks against his hand. You quirk an eyebrow.

“Don’t push your luck. And whether I’m mad or not, you owe me cookies.”

He doesn’t hesitate to nod, leaning down and pressing a soft kiss to your lips, “Anything you want. Everything you want. I don’t care, Y/N. You – both of you – you’re my world now.”

Bedtime stories

Ta-da!! Another day, another challenge entry! This cute little drabble is for the lovely @impala-dreamer and her one prompt for all challenge - it had to be Dean x Reader, no more then 3000 words and I had to use the prompt exactly as it was given (you’ll find it bolded)

Word count: 822

Characters: Dean Winchester, wife Reader, Lucas Winchester (OMC), Sam Winchester (mentioned)

Warnings: one swear word, daddy Dean (yes that needs mentioning - your ovaries will thank me)


 Walking through the bunker, I follow the sound of laughter to my son’s room. If someone had told me several years ago that I’d be living in an underground fortress and raising a kid I probably would’ve laughed in their face. But then I met the Winchesters. It took 3 werewolves and 1 horrendous dive bar to change the path of my future, and I wouldn’t change a single second of it – well maybe the part where I got clawed to hell and back.  

After much back and forth between me and the elder brother, I became Mrs Winchester 4 years ago (well as much as I could anyway – not much you can do when the man you love is considered legally dead). And just over 9 months after that, our family grew bigger with the arrival of our honeymoon baby. 

Leaning against the door frame, I smile at the sight before me. My mini-Dean is bouncing up and down on his bed and throwing his favourite stuffed moose onto the floor time and time again as his dad tries to get him ready for bed.

Keep reading

Hate To Love You

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: Swearing, fighting, violence, blood, inury, bad blood between Reader and Bucky, mentions of breakup

Word Count: 1087

Summary: After you and Bucky breakup you can’t stand to be apart of the Avengers any longer, choosing instead to work for yourself. However when Steve asks for your help, telling you that there was no one else he could ask you agreed to one more mission. 

A/N: I’m re posting this from my old blog, so I’m going to keep the original tag post for part 2 but if you wanted to be added just let me know right HERE !!


“There isn’t anybody else?”
“Sorry y/n, Wanda’s still in Sokovia and I couldn’t get Nat back on such short notice.”
“It’s fine, not your fault Steve,” I sighed, pinching the bridge of my nose. “What time do we fly out?”
“Zero six hundred tomorrow,” He replied, the sound of relief hanging in his voice. “Thanks for this y/n, I owe you.”
“Yeah, yeah.”

I disconnected the call, feeling my shoulders slump as I leant back on the kitchen bench, already exhausted by the thought of tomorrow’s mission. It wasn’t so much the mission itself though, it would be nice to get back into doing what I’d trained for years to do, it would be nice seeing Steve again. However I was also one hundred percent sure that Bucky would also be assigned on the mission, hence why I had a blooming headache starting already.

It had been eight months since I’d last seen or spoken to him, eight months since we broke up in a fit of shouting, tears and thrown objects. It hadn’t been pleasant and as a result I’d walked straight out of the Avengers compound, fully intending to never ever go back. I had been determined back then to get out of that business completely, find an apartment in the city and go to a normal nine to five job like everybody else. However, once something was in your life it was hard to let it go, so I found myself doing odd freelancing jobs, sometimes even for Nick Fury if he asked.
I wasn’t at all surprised that he’d passed my new number onto Steve, telling him that I would be more than happy to help him out if he needed.

Pushing myself off the bench I moved to the kitchen cabinet, pulling down a glass and the bottle of whiskey I kept for occasions such as these. Uncapping the lid I poured two fingers into the glass, swallowing them down in only two mouthfuls, the amber liquid burning as it went down my throat. I looked up at the clock as I poured out a little more alcohol. Only seven hours to take off.

-

The sound of my boots on the tarmac seemed to magnify in the quiet morning, the fog still hanging low to the ground and the sun only barely peeking out in the horizon. I took a deep breath and watched as it misted out in front of me in the frigid morning air.

“Y/n!”
I spun around at the call of my name, my eyes landing on Steve, dressed up in his Captain America suit, the cap hanging off one of his wrists. He jogged the last feet between us, bringing me swiftly into his arms, lifting me up slightly off the ground.
“It’s so good to see you!” I said with a genuine smile, having only just realized how much I actually missed him. “Eight months hasn’t changed you a bit.”
He shrugged, releasing me from his grip and standing back, his eyes sweeping over my form.
“It’s changed you though,” He chuckled. “You look good y/n.”
“Thanks,” I murmured, feeling the blush creep over my cheeks.

We were pulled from our short reunion as someone cleared their throat behind us, my eyes landing on Bucky, his jaw tense and tight.
“Mind if we move this along?” he glowered, his eyes barely sweeping over me as he turned his glare to Steve.
Steve looked like he was about to reply but I cut him off before he had the chance, my hand landing on my hip as I glared back at the soldier.
“Nice to know that hostility hasn’t left your personality James.”
“You bring it out in me,” He spat back, lips set in a thin line.

Without another word he pushed past us both, making sure that his shoulder bumped mine as he passed, the nudge causing me to stumble slightly. I glared venomously at the back of his head, my hands balling into fists at my side. At this very second the only thing I wanted to do was pull the glock from where it was resting on my side and shoot a nice hole through that metal shoulder of his.

Steve squeezed my shoulder, probably guessing my train of thought, the expression on his face filled with guilt.
“Sorry y/n,” He said. “I didn’t think he’d act quite like that.”
“What exactly were you expecting? It’s not like we ended our relationship on the best of terms,” Steve grimaced and I suddenly felt shitty for taking it out on him; he wasn’t the one acting like a total dick. “Honestly, it’s fine Steve, this is after all a job and no matter how we feel towards each other we might as well be professional about it.”

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Wedding in Hawaii || Part 3

hi. part 3 is here which is also the last i think. although i may or may not will write the bit when they go home and stuff bc of the airport pictures of harry with the glasses on and stuff. i might just carry on a whole story line with them, give a girl name and then when i have ideas i just write it with them two bc i like how in love they are and i’m sad lolololol. whatcha think?? also i hope you’ll enjoy this like you did with the other 2, it was fun to be fed so good this week by the king lmao. and as well lemme know what you wanna read, if you have any ideas please send them to me so i can think about them and make it happen sometime. lotta love, xoxo -b

Part 1Part 2

Alright.

Okay.

Keep your shit together, girl.

He is only wearing a whiteish-creamish coloured suit with a baby blue shirt.

You’ll be fine, honestly.

But then his tanned skin and bright smile, his amazing emerald eyes and his mind spinning scent!

Holy cow.

I was one lucky gal as I saw Harry coming out of the bathroom, fully dressed and ready to go. He washed his hair so his curls were all over the place but it was so sexy and adorable at the same time I honestly didn’t know how he managed it all.

“I swear I don’t know how I got so lucky,” he said as he walked over to me, sneaking his arms around me and kissing my neck right up to beneath my ear then across my jawline. “You look bloody stunning,” he complimented me which made my heart flutter and cheeks flush red.

I didn’t even realise I closed my eyes and my lips parted as he pressed open mouthed kisses on my skin and his hand was squeezing my bum here and there. Being so close to him just allowed me to inhale his typical Harry smell which yes indeed it included the minty flavour or scent or whatever of his chewing gum that never seemed to leave his mouth.

“I love your ass,” he whispered in my ear as he pressed a whole lot of new kisses onto my skin. “I also love you. Like crazy.”

“I feel like we’re on our honeymoon,” I chuckled then a sigh left my lips as he nibbled on my earlobe and dragged his tongue down the side of my neck. “You’ve gotta stop this, now.”

“Do I really?” he murmured into my skin as he held me closer to his body.

“Behave, mister,” I said weakly, not being able to control myself as he took over me just by kissing my neck and gripping my ass.

How was he doing this?

“Alright-alright,” he gave in as he pulled away. His usual side smirk was still on his face then he laughed which caused his eyes to crinkle and his dimples to deepen in his cheeks. “I’d love to come back here with you for, like, a month.”

“Are you crazy?” I looked at him with wide eyes as I took my phone out of my bag. “I don’t have the expenses to afford a whole month in Hawaii.”

“I’ll pay it,” he shrugged like it was no big deal. Which I understood. He was a multibillionaire. Of course he could afford it.

He could’ve bought the entire island if he wanted to with all the money he had.

“Alright, whatever,” I laughed it off as I walked past him. “You can’t just say stuff like this. I hate it when you pay for all my stuff. You didn’t let me pay for my own plane tickets because you wanted us to fly first class.”

“So what’s wrong with that? I can afford it. I want to buy things, nice things, for you; I want to spend my money on you. I love you, of course I spoil you.”

“You spoil me too much, though. You don’t have to win me over with your money you have already won me over with your personality and I just want you to know that you are enough for me. You are an amazing man, I couldn’t ask for a better boyfriend than you and I truly mean that from the bottom of my heart.

You honestly make me go crazy, like, absolutely nuts. I cannot keep my hands off of you and I think you already know this but I can’t stop looking at you either. You are honestly the greatest, kindest, most humble guy I have ever met in my life and I’m so freaking grateful to have you. I’m so damn blessed.”

His eyes kept looking into mine as I rambled on about how much I loved him or something along those lines. I didn’t even know what I was saying because the words just left my mouth and I was hoping and praying that nothing silly was spoken by me.

“Right, this is final,” he said slowly as he nodded and swallowed. “I am for sure, like, 100% taking you to Hawaii for a whole month and I am paying it all. We are flying first class and you will not bring any money, not even your bank card. Like I am literally going to pay for everything for you.”

“Like hell you will! Calm your tits, pal. Just cause I tell you how much I love you and how amazing you are, which you should know anyway, doesn’t mean that you can just become my sugar daddy. I am not giving you sugar for money although it comes in handy sometimes…” I joked around which caused him to laugh with his head back and hand on his stomach.

It was the prettiest view and the most angelic sound I have heard that day. I loved making Harry laugh and smile and happy.

He deserved the best and I was determined to give him the best. Even if I couldn’t be considered as the best.

**

The dinner was on the beach, the sun was still up so it gave us enough light to see each other and be able to have food outside. It was lovely as we heard the tides of the sea crashing on the sandy shore and the slightly salty yet extremely fresh smell filled my lungs.

Harry was sitting on my right side while Lily was on his left side, talking his ear off which I found rather funny. Especially when he could barely control himself so his hand gripped my thigh a bit firmer as his it was resting there.

He leaned over to me when the little girl got up from the table and left with her mum to go somewhere, his nose slightly nuzzling against mine as a quiet sigh escaped his lips.

“If we ever have a daughter I do not know how I’ll cope,” he said chuckling and I joined him. He pressed his lips against mine in a soft kiss and pulled away just to do it again several times after the first one. “I love you.”

“I love you,” I smiled as my eyes fluttered open just to look right into his shining green ones.

Before I fully moved away from him I kissed his cheek which caused him to blush a little and I found that adorable. I didn’t know why he blushed whenever I kissed him but I loved it like I loved him.

“What would you like to name our daughter?” I asked him suddenly as we were both leaning back in our chairs, the people at the table were all in deep conversation about something.

“Hmmm,” he hummed, putting his elbow on the arm of the chair he was sitting on as he leaned his chin against the side of his index finger. “I don’t know, I think-, we are most probably going to change it right as she’ll be born. Y’know how random we are,” he laughed.

“Right I think we would and will probably end up doing that,” I agreed. At that point I didn’t realise we were talking like it is going to happen but to be honest we had a good relationships and I didn’t see anything that could possibly damage our bond in the near future.

Anything’s possible for us. We have the chance to create a family together in the future and that makes me excited.

“But, urm, something special I think,” I said finally, after he thought about it a bit. “I’d definitely want something for her that would suit her and a name that would be special and unique.”

“As special and unique as Bear Payne or…” I grinned at him which caused him to widen his eyes and it was the funniest thing ever. Then I clocked on. I just shaded his best mate’s son’s name and I didn’t even mean to do that. “I mean that’s not actually what I wanted to say.”

“Oh my god,” he continued to laugh as he covered his mouth with his hand. Then he put the other one over his hand that was already on his lips and his whole body was shaking as he made fun of me making fun of Liam’s son’s name.

But I didn’t really.

I thought it was cute and of course a bit unusual but definitely unique. I think it was mainly his girlfriend who decided on the name so I can’t really give all the credit to Liam for giving his son the name he got in the end.

“Stop it, Harry,” I punched his arm with my fist but I didn’t actually hurt him. This got him though because he stopped and put on a fake hurt face which made me laugh. He was honestly so goofy and playful, sometimes it just made me wanna have kids with him as I wanted to see him with them. “So, what about our daughter’s name then, huh?”

“Okay, let’s talk like adults then,” he said as he cleared his throat and a big sigh left his lips. “I would probably like to call her, um, Maya or something.”

“Maya or something?” I asked back as my eyebrow arched up higher than I could have drawn it as I was getting ready.

“I like Maya, it’s, well, I think it’s different. What do you think? Do you like it?”

“I mean it’s a pretty name but I’m not too keen on it,” I told him my honest opinion. “I’d rather call her something more-, I don’t know. Something more umpfh if you get me?”

Umpfh,” he repeated. His eyes slowly looked into mine and I already saw his smirk growing bigger and bigger. Then before I knew it his head was leaned back and he was laughing his ass off. “Right, describe this umpfh for me, please, pretty girl.”

“You’re just making fun of me, you deserve no explanation,” I told him with a serious face expression but deep down I was dying from the laughter I had to hold back.

God why were we such a goofy and childish couple? We didn’t take anything seriously, we laughed most of the time that we spent together and basically we were both just a mess as soon as we saw each other or started talking.

We could be texting and when I type out that “I’m crying I can’t cope I’m pissing myself” I’m actually like that. Some people just text that stuff, I actually feel it and do it. I mean yeah, Harry is funny…

But I’m hilarious.

I think I laugh at my own jokes more than Harry does. But then again he laughs at his own jokes too. And sometimes we laugh at each other’s – well, okay, we laugh all the fucking time I don’t even know what I’m trying to say anymore.

We’re funny and end of.